Bound By Compassion
by Ravenwiccn
Summary: Leigh Hawke tries to find a way to survive in Kirkwall while keeping her secret. Along the way she finds love in the arms of a possessed apostate.
1. Chapter 1

Leigh Hawke and her companions were leaving the Hanged Man after returning from the Wounded Coast. After a few rounds of drinks the group called it a night. Leigh and her sister Bethany only had a little ways to go to get home. Varric and Isabela both had rooms at the Hanged Man. Aveline and Fenris left together heading for Hightown. Merill had left hours earlier. Anders would make the lonely walk to Darktown.

"If you wait for a few minutes for me to get Bethany back to my uncle's I can walk you home Anders." Leigh did not like the idea of any of her friends being alone especially with all the slavers, carta, and thugs running the streets at night.

"I can take care of myself Hawke. I am a big boy. Thank you though." He bowed to her and went to leave. Leigh sighed then wrapped her arm around her sister's shoulder leading her home.

"You seem worried sister. Anders has survived this long alone I am sure he will be fine."

"I know Beth, I know. You know me I am forever the older sister. I don't like to see any of my family alone."

"Well you could always follow him to make sure he gets home safe." Leigh smiled at her baby sister. Once Leigh made sure her Bethany was safe at home she ran after Anders. The shadows were much deeper on this moonless night so ever the rogue she blended into to them. It did not take her to find the mage. As she feared he had gotten himself into trouble.

"We know your a mage. Now you are going to pay us protection or we will turn you into the Templars." The Coterie was well known for extorting money from anyone they could. Leigh fumed. They had gone to far this time attacking a man who did nothing but help people. Also the fact she counted him as a friend meant they were messing with her too.

"If you value your lives you will walk away now." From where Leigh was standing she could start see the faint blue glow erupt on Anders' skin telling her Justice was trying to break through. Anders leveled his staff at the thugs readying a spell. He did not realize one of their archers had him marked until the arrow went into his shoulder. That was all it took for Leigh to make her move. She flicked a miasma grenade in the middle of the crowd and ran for her friend.

Anders fell to his knees, his staff arm completely useless. Tears welled up in his eyes from the miasma and his lungs began to constrict. A firm arm wrapped around his waist and started lifting him up. He tried to pull away, but had no energy to fight.

"Run!" It was all the shadow said and he obeyed. He could hear the Coterie thugs yelling, but none seemed to follow. The shadow weaved him through the cramped throughways of Darktown til it found a hiding spot near his clinic. Once the coast was clear she went to assess his wound. "I'm a big boy he said, can take care of himself he said. Maker, Anders you almost got yourself killed." The flippant bell like voice of Leigh greeted his ears.

"Hawke?"

"The one and only."

"You followed me?" His voice sounded more surprised than angry. His shoulder throbbed and he let out a hiss when he tried to move. Leigh's firm hands pushed him back to sit down on some crates.

"Yes, and before you start yelling at me let me at least get that arrow out of your arm and bandage it." She routed through her pockets and found a leather tie wrapped around a piece of wood. "Here bit down on this while I pull the thing out." Doing as he was told Anders watched her eyes as she went to work breaking the shaft of the arrow before pulling it out. Her left hand sought out one of his as her right gripped the arrow. With one quick pull she had the arrow out, but not before he crushed her fingers in spasm. "Quite a grip you have for a mage."

"I didn't hurt you did I?"

"No, believe me my brother use to do far worse." A sad smile played on her lips then disappeared as quickly as it came. Taking pieces of her cloak she began to bandage his shoulder til she could get him back to his clinic. "Carver use to come home all the time with cuts and broken bones. My mother was not keen on the sight of blood so it was up to me and my father to fix him up. At first I was just the distraction, then after my father passed I became the healer. You learn a lot when your family has to stay isolated from everyone for fear they would call the Templars to take your sister away."

"I know, believe me I know. Is your brother here in Kirkwall too or did he stay in Fereldan?"

"He...he died when the darkspawn overtook Lothering."

"Hawke, I am so sorry. I didn't know."

"It's okay. I try not to talk about him much for Bethany and my mother's sakes. He was Bethany's twin and my parents only son." Anders left hand moved up and touched her cheek. He could feel her tears. For as strong as she acts he knew there was a human under that sarcastic rogue exterior. "Carver and I always butted heads. He hated the fact that when my father died I took on the roll of keeping all of us safe. He thought he should have been the man of the house, but he was only fifteen. He was lucky if he knew his arse from his elbow."

"You miss him don't you?" All Leigh could do was nod. A strangled sod broke from her lips as she fought to contain her tears. "Leigh, I..."

"Please, don't. I...I can't cry in front of you."

"Why? Your human Leigh you can cry."

"I don't want to cry. I hate crying. The last time I cried was when...was when my father died. I have to be strong for my family, for my friends. Crying solves nothing."

"And who gave you that fool notion? We are all adults Leigh we can help you by sharing the load. You don't have to do this alone."

"I can't fail again. If anything happens to any of you it will..." The last of her resolve faltered and she let her grief take hold. All Anders could do was pull her to him with his good arm and let her cry on his shoulder. Her body shook as she cried. Years of pent up grief and fear reared their ugly head.

"Shhh, I'm here." It sounded silly to say it, but deep down he meant it. Her arms wrapped around his waist like he was her anchor in this sea of grief. After what seemed like hours her sobs quieted and her breathing leveled. She looked up at him then turned away quickly. Wiping her face with what was left of her cloak.

"Anders, I am so sorry. You shouldn't have to deal with this."

"Leigh I told you about Justice and you barely batted a eyelash. It is only fair that I be here for you. You have saved my life from those thugs in the streets. If anything I owe you much more than lending you my shoulder to cry on."

"You owe me nothing. All the stupid trouble I get you all into I surprised you don't all tell me to go to hell."

"What is life without a bit of trouble? It makes things less boring. I don't regret anything I have done in the time I have spent with you. I don't think the others do either. Well maybe Fenris, but, no I will behave myself." A smirk twisted on her lips. "See there is the smile I was hoping to see."

"I swear the two of you remind me of Bethany and Carver. Always at each other' s throats, but when push comes to shove you will have the others back." She shook her head and laughed. "We better get you back to your clinic and really get that wound cleaned up and re-bandaged."

"Do you think the coast is clear?"

"Yes I do. The Coterie is mostly lazy, they are most likely gone by now. Wait here I will go check to see if the way is clear." Even without her dark cloak she blended into the shadows very well. He lost sight of her within seconds. After a few agonizing minutes of waiting she returned and led him home. "Alright take your shirt off."

"What?"

"I have to check your shoulder and I can't do that with you heavy robes on so off with your shirt." Leigh stood in front of him with her hand on her hip giving him the "you better do what I say" look. "Now where do you keep your bandages?"

"They are in the back room. Cabinet on the left." She walked away and he began to take off his top. With a swift motion he sent a healing wave through his arm. "I guess she forgot I can heal myself. I can have some fun with this." Justice growled in the back of his head, but he didn't care. Most people he knew would not have come after him to make sure he made it home alright. The last time he had that was when he was with the Wardens. He missed the Commander the most. Ashlyn Therin had been a true friend. She even covered his escape when he left to come here. Leigh was an amazing woman. He tried not to be attracted to her, but he knew it was impossible not to like her.

"Alright let's take a look." Leigh with bandages in hand had returned. Anders had shrugged the robe off of his good arm, but it was still on his right shoulder. "Here let me help you get that off." Ever so slowly she eased the shirt off his shoulder. It took all his self control not to laugh his head off when she finally noticed he was healed. "Maker, how stupid can I be? I forgot you can heal yourself. You could have said something."

"And miss the look on your face?" Anders began to laugh til he couldn't breath or see from the tears his laughter had brought. Leigh gently smacked him in the back of the head and glared at him. "Oh don't be mad I was just having a little fun. Maker, I haven't laughed like that in a while."

"Evil little apostate."

"Hey now, no need for name calling. It was just a joke Hawke." She walked away from him for a moment then turned around. She had a mischievous look in her eyes. Anders gave a audible gulp knowing full well she would get him back for this.

"Your gonna pay for this you know that right?"

"Yes, but it was worth it." She smiled at him and shook her head. "Do your worst, my lady." Without warning she closed the distance between them crushing her lips to his. Anders froze, then relented reaching up to pull her closer. The feel of her fingers tracing circles on his chest drove him mad. With a growl he pulled her into his lap, releasing her mouth so he could plant kisses down her neck. Leigh moaned softly as she tangled her fingers in his hair.

"_Maker, he can kiss. There is much more than meets the eye with this man."_ Anders claimed her mouth again and put much more passion behind this kiss. She felt his hands begin to roam her body finding the ties that held her in her leather armor. His fingers worked diligently to dislodge her. A sharp knocking at his clinic door broke the two apart. Leigh looked like a child being caught sneaking a cookie when she was told not to. She untangled herself from the mage and straightened her armor.

"Healer? Healer, please I need your help." The sound of a woman's voice came from the other side of the door. Anders quickly dressed and went for the door. Leigh grabbed his hand before he could open it.

"What if it is the Coterie? Let me open the door." She unsheathed her dagger and prepared herself. Slowly she opened the door to find a woman not much older than her holding a child.

"Please is the healer in. My son, he is with fever." Leigh stepped aside and let the woman in. Anders took the boy from her arms and began healing him. All the rogue could do was watch. This was something she use to watch her father do. There were times she would have given anything to have her father's gifts. To her there was no finer gift than that of a healer.

A few hours later when the boy out of danger from his fever Anders noticed Leigh was gone. He had been so busy healing the boy that he did not notice her leave. "Well that is a little rude she didn't even say goodbye." _"She is still near by. There is something off about her. Almost like a echo." _"What do you mean echo?" _"I can feel a touch of magic in her, but it is bound, hidden. She is trouble my friend." _"Are you sure?" _"Yes." _Anders touched his lips, he could still taste her. Deep down he wanted more, but he would not drag her down with him. He went to his cot and tried to rest a little. His dreams were haunted by her, but for the first time in a long time he did not want to wake up.


	2. Chapter 2

**I forgot to put this in the first chapter so here it goes. I own nothing Bioware owns it all. I am new to this and any critics would be appreciated. Thank you to those who have put this on there watch list and those who are reading. **  
>The Deep Roads were not what Leigh had expected. She knew it would be dark, but not this dark. After Varric's brother left them down here to die she wanted nothing more than to see the sun again. They had made camp and it was her watch. A figure moved out of the corner of her eye and was coming toward her. She tensed and began drawing her daggers.<p>

"Nice night isn't it?" Instantly she relaxed hearing Anders voice.

"If you could call it night. I have lost track of time down here." He gave her a sad smile. "I want to thank you for coming with us."

"I promised myself I would never come down here again, but how could I turn such a pretty girl down when she asked me so nicely." Leigh felt her checks get hot as the blood rushed to them.

"I am glad I left Bethany home for this. If I never see a darkspawn or a demon again it will be too soon. Now I know why my father always was so serious when it came to training my sister. He wanted her to be safe."

"Bethany told me your father was also an apostate. I admire him for never getting caught. I myself escaped seven times."

"Seven? Wow you would think they would have given you points for trying after three."

"You'd think, but the last time they were going to put me to death. If it hadn't been for the Wardens I would be tranquil or dead." She wasn't sure if it was the fire light or shadows, but she could have sworn he had a small smirk on his face.

"I feel there is a story behind that. My father told me how he escaped. I never thought he was telling me the truth til I found those letters he wrote. I still can't believe a Templar helped him get away. The man went so far as to pay for both of my parents to get to Ferelden."

"My most spectacular escape was swimming across lake Calenhad. It took them over a month to find me." Leigh chuckled a bit. "Unfortunately they always found me." The bitterness returned to his voice. "I envy your sister having someone who could teach her away from the Circle."

"My father never wanted any of us to be born mages because of the what that would mean for us. When Beth started to show signs of it...well I guess that was the beginning of the end. Carver started acting out. My parents were worried all the time and then there was me trying desperately to protect everything."

"You put too much on yourself Leigh. You take care of everyone and leave nothing for yourself. It is not healthy."

"Your one to talk. Helping people for nothing, being a tireless advocate for mages, and not to mention running around with us, you do a lot too."

"Running around with all of you has been fun, well up til now. I had forgotten how good it feels to be fighting along side good people."

"I can't remember a time when I had this many people around me that I called friend. I always had to be careful on who I trusted." Leigh absentmindedly played with the amulet she always wore. A sad look crossed over her face, thinking about her past. "I made the mistake of falling for a man and it ended rather badly. He tried to take both my father and sister away. I hide my sister, but my father was...he did not have much time left."

"Most people do not understand the plight of mages, they just think we are all out to control the world. If that man had truly loved you he would not have hurt you like that." A dark laugh left her lips and hot angry tears threatened to break from her eyes.

"I am not sure Templars are capable of love." Leigh felt Anders stiffen next to her. She knew how much he hated the Chantry's little lap dogs. "I never meant to care for him the way I did. I started out using him to see if they knew about my family. I thought he was different, I thought wrong. I was young and stupid, falling for the fairytale of a noble knight. Now I see them and all I can think is...Oh Maker here I go again. You don't need to hear this. I am just rambling again. You really should go try to get some sleep we have another long march into Maker knows what." She did not look up into his eyes, but he could hear the anger and pain in her voice. Her long fingers continued to twist and play with her amulet.

"That amulet, I have never seen anything like it before. May I?" Leigh nodded and lifted it off over her head. It was a silver disk with a blood red stone set in the middle of it. Strange markings adorn the front and a small inscription was engraved on the back. He could feel intense magic coming off of it. It felt warm in his hands. Anders turned it over to read the inscription. "To have compassion is to have life. Never forget." He looked into her eyes questioning the meaning of the words.

"If you don't live a life with compassion you are better off not living at all. It is to remind me of who I am and where I came from. My father use to tell me out of all the spirits in the fade Compassion was the strongest. It made demons quake in it's wake. He said there was no greater feeling than that of having love for your fellow men, whether they were elf, dwarf, mage, or even Qunari. If you could find it in your heart to be open minded you would live a full life."

"Your father was a wise man, Leigh." He handed back her amulet.

"I miss him so much. You know you remind me of him sometimes. I guess it is a mage thing." Leigh could have sworn she saw a slight blush start to burn on his cheeks. "I...I never got to apologies for what happened between us. I did not mean to kiss you...I mean I did, but..." A finger gently hushed her.

"You don't have to apologies to me. If I had not wanted you to kiss me I would have stopped you. Maker knows I have tried to talk sense to you about wanting anything to do with me. You deserve to be happy and safe, not hunted and hated."

"I am not afraid of that or Justice for that matter."

"You should be." Again he shook his head bitterly. "You are so stubborn."

"I'm not and I refuse to let him be a wall that you try to put between us. He does not scare me and neither do you." She rose off the rocky ground and started to walk away.

"Where are you going?"

"To wake the others we need to move on. I want to get home and sitting here is not getting us anywhere." Leaving him to his thoughts she went to wake Fenris and Varric. Once all of them were up they started their long march again. Leigh took point followed closely by Fenris. Varric and Anders stayed further back.

"What did you say to her Blondie to light that fire in her eyes? I have never seen her like this." Anders sighed at the dwarf Varric. "Come on spill."

"It is nothing. She is just...Andraste's knicker weasels! She does not see how dangerous it is to be associated with an apostate. It could get her killed and she doesn't even bat an eye. I don't want to see her hurt. Leigh deserves better." Varric laughed and slapped his hand on Anders' back.

"Her sister is an apostate, so is Merill and you think she is afraid of hanging around you. What she really should be afraid of is getting your melancholy attitude, Blondie."

"I am not melancholy!" His voice echoed through the cavern much louder than he wanted it to. He cringed when Leigh turned around and stared at him. "Maker's breath, now see what you did Varric."

"You did it yourself Blondie." Anders stopped dead and let the others walk on ahead. He heard a rumble before Fenris yelled. He saw the elf push Leigh out of the way as the rock creature rolled over Varric and Fenris. It headed straight for him, with nowhere to run all Anders could do was wait for it to reach him. Justice tried to burst forward, but was too late the rock wraith was upon him before he could raise his staff.

OoO

The force of Fenris' shove sent Hawke flying into the wall. It knocked the wind out of her, making it hard for her to move. Through pain teared eyes she watched her friends be barreled over by a creature made of large rocks. It's last victim was Anders. A burning rage welled up in her as she willed her body to move. With her companions now taken out of the picture the rock wraith and it's minions turned their attentions to her. Leigh's side ached and she found it hard to breath, but the sight of her friends laying there defenseless was all needed to spark her into action. She ran at the creature, both daggers bared not caring if she could kill the thing or not. She had to get to Anders and wake him up, at that point she would even welcome dealing with Justice.

The rock wraith made a move for her hitting dead air. She had disappeared only to reappear next to her fallen mage. Her father always said her magic was the ability to move unseen, unnoticed til it was too late and you found yourself on the business end of her daggers. "Anders, wake up! Please, please wake up!" Leigh's voice was bordering on hysterical as she gently smacked his cheeks. Blood was flowing slowly from his head. At least he was still breathing, albeit raggedly. "I am not losing any of you to this monster. Anders please." When her pleas went unanswered she knew she had to try another approach. "Alright Justice I know you are in there. I don't care if you hate me, but if you don't help all of us are dead. Are you going to let this demon win? Get up!" Nothing happened and the last of the hope she had left dropped back into her stomach like chunk of ice. A loud rumble sounded behind her and she threw herself in a defensive position in front of Anders. "I will not die down here and neither will my friends. Come and get me." "_Maker please, help me. I can't lose them. I won't!" _The last thing she remembered was a bright light before she was knocked out. Everything fell away and she no longer cared if she did not wake up.

OoO

Varric woke in a pile of rubble. Everything hurt, but he was alive. A low gravelly groan from his left told him Fenris was still in the land of the living too. "This is why I am glad I was born top side. I really hate this place. You alright?" Fenris hissed as he tried to move his broken arm.

"Could be worse. Where are the others?" Varric turned and looked around the cavern all he could see was rocks of varying size strewn like tossed pebbles. He eased himself off the rubble he had been sitting on top of.

"Hawke! Anders!" Only silence answered him. "This is not funny you two. Come on out." Varric and Fenris looked at each other then moved to find their missing companions. "If they are hiding I am going to kill them."

"I will help you." Further down the cavern they found Anders. It took all of Fenris' self control not to kick the mage. He let Varric tend to Anders while he continued the search for Hawke. "Hawke!" A groan then a flash of blue light told the elf Anders was at least awake and able to heal. The throbbing in his arm made him want to scream, but he had to find Hawke. A glint of red caught his eye. He made his way slowly over to the shining object only to find a amulet. Anders and Varric joined him as he stared quizzically at the necklace.

"That's Leigh's," Anders started looking around them frantic to find their leader. "she has to be around here somewhere." The three men spread out beginning their search again, Anders cast a light spell on some of the larger rocks around them to illuminate the cavern. His heart began to pound in his chest as the feeling of dread rose. He had to find her, she had to be alive there was no other option. He could not lose her, not now. "Please, let her be alright. Maker, she has to be alright."

"Over here, I found her." Varric's voice boomed from a distance. Both Anders and Fenris broke into a full out run. There in front of of the dwarf was the very still form of Leigh Hawke. Her face was covered in bruises and dirt, but the rest of her looked unharmed. The mage fell to his knees right next to her. Before he could do anything her body moved up, dagger drawn. Fenris was faster, he stopped her from slitting Anders throat with his good arm.

"It's us Hawke." Her eyes were spinning around wildly in her head. The low gravel of the voice made her pause. Her vision became clearer finally seeing the concerned faces of the three men around her.

"Fenris? What the hell happened?"

"We were about to ask you the same question. How is the name of the Maker did you kill that thing?"

"I didn't do it. I think...," Her eyes shifted to Anders. She knew Fenris did not know about his extra passenger and with the way he felt about mages she was not about to mention it either. "I think Anders might have come to enough to stop it. I saw a bright light then I passed out." She ran her hand over her neck and panicked. "Where is my amulet? Oh Maker, I can't lose that. It's the last thing I have left of my father." She tried to stand and fell over into the waiting arms of all three men.

"Is this it Hawke?" She looked up at Fenris as he held the chain in his metal encased hands.

"Yes, thank you. I don't know what I would do if I lost this." He slipped it into her hands so she could return it to the rightful place on her neck. "Are the rest of you alright?"

"Other than our pride and Fenris' arm we are just fine." Varric smiled at her and she returned his. The tight feeling in her chest started to subside. Dread made way for relief, her friends were standing in front of her more of less unharmed. After Anders healed Fenris' arm and made sure they all were up to the trek, he sat down next to Hawke.

"See why I hate the Deep Roads?"

"I am starting to share that feeling. Thank you and please thank Justice for us too. I tried to wake you up, but I couldn't. I was desperate enough to try to get Justice to show himself."

"Your welcome." Inside him Justice squirmed. "_I did not stop that creature. I was uncontentious with you. There is something going one here that does not sit well with me."_ Anders stuffed his own doubt down chalking it up to they were damn lucky to be alive.

"Hey Hawke, come take a look at what that thing was guarding!" She made her way to the back end of the cavern and had to stop her eyes from popping out of her skull. A pile of treasure was tucked off into a corner. "Now this makes it almost worth it." Hawke clapped Varric on the back, giving him a warm smile. It was indeed worth it. There was enough there to have them all set of the rest of their lives. As much as she wanted to put Bartand's head on a pike for leaving them to die, she could not be more pleased on how it has turned out. Life for once was looking brighter. She could not wait to get home and share this with her family. She finally could keep her promise to her father and take care of her family. Finally she could have a future without fear of it all being ripped away.


	3. Chapter 3

It had taken Leigh and her friends at least a few weeks to get back to Kirkwall. The treasure they had found would help buy back her family's estate and she hoped it would also protect her sister. She failed to keep Carver safe, but she would be damned if she was going to lose Bethany. The closer they got to home the faster she wanted to get there. After battling darkspawn, demons, and Maker knows what else down in the Deep Roads, Leigh desperately wanted a nice hot bath and a good meal.

"Hey Hawke, can we slow down, I have short legs remember." She turned and saw Varric panting, as he strained to keep up with his longer legged friends.

"Sorry, I just want to get home. We will stop for a bit and take a break."

"Thanks, my poor bunions have bunions. Here take a look at this." Leigh crouched down next to Varric as he pulled a small trinket from his belt pouch. "Do you think Sunshine will like it?" Leigh smirked at hearing the pet name the dwarf had affectionately gave her little sister. The trinket was silver, encrusted with small precious stones. It sparkled in the sunlight, casting of a prism of light onto Varric's face.

"I think she will love it. You know us Hawke's we love shiny things. We are like dwarves that way."

"Oh, is that why you have a thing for sparkle fingers over there, because he glows?" Leigh's face went from amused to embarrassed in seconds flat. Even under the dirt and blood she knew he could see her blush profusely. "Ah, my dear Hawke you give to much away and you call yourself a rogue." The hearty sound of his laughter made both Anders and Fenris look from their resting places. The crimson flush grew deeper on her cheeks and she attempted to hide her face behind her hair.

"Shut up, Varric." This spurred the dwarf to laugh louder. "I swear by all that is holy if you don't stop I will..." She stopped when the shadows of both of their companions passed over them. Leigh quickly jumped to her feet and stomped away from the others.

"What did you say to her Varric?"

"Nothing much Blondie, I guess our dear Lady Hawke can't take a joke. We should get moving again, it should not be too much further to Kirkwall." The rest of the journey home was made in silence. Once the gates of Kirkwall were in view Leigh gave a sigh of relief. It took all her will not to break into a run to get home faster. After a brief conversation they all parted ways to clean up and rest. The plan was to meet at the Hanged Man later that night a celebrate. Leigh felt like she could have walked on air as she headed for her uncle's house.

"Mama, Bethany I'm home. You will never believe what happened to us." When no one came to greet her she went into the room she and her sister shared. "Mama?" A pitiful sob met her as she walked through the door. Her mother was sitting on the edge of Bethany's bed holding the staff her father had made. "Mama, what's wrong? Where is Beth?" All her mother could do was sob louder.

"The Templars came and took her away just this morning." Her uncle's voice made Leigh jump. "Where the hell were you?"

"I...we ran into some complications down there." Leigh's mind swam with visions of her sister being forcefully ripped from her mother's arms and a surge of rage began to crawl up from her gut. "Who took her?"

"It doesn't matter. He said we were lucky the Viscount owes you or we all would be facing the hangman's noose." Before her uncle could blink Leigh's hands were on his shirt and her teeth were bared.

"Who took her? I want a name, now!"

"Kni...Knight Captain Cullen. He took her to the Gallows." She released Gamlen and headed for the door with murder on her mind. "Where are you going? You can't help her now, it is too late." She did not hear him or her mother's cries for her to come back. All she could see was red and a past she thought she had long buried.

"_Cullen? Maker, help me. Scratch that Maker help him."_ "Hawke!" Leigh did not hear Aveline. "Hawke wait!" Leigh turned to face the Guard Captain. Her eyes narrowed and her knuckles were pure white from clenching her fists into tight balls.

"You knew didn't you? Why didn't you warn her?" The rage in her was nearly at the boiling point. "I asked you to watch over my sister and you couldn't even do that." Aveline stepped back like she had been hit. "Get out of my way Aveline or I will make you."

"Hawke there was nothing I could do. They did not inform me til after she was taken. I would have protected her if I could have. They knew we are friends so I was left out of the loop. I am so sorry." The look on the guard's face told Leigh she was telling the truth. Of course she was, Aveline had never lied to her.

"It is not your fault, but I am not letting this slide, they will know they have made a enemy."

"Think before you do this. You have two other friends who the Templars would love to get their hands on. What do you think they will do to Merill or Anders? You start a war with the Templars it won't end well for any of us."

"I...your right, but I still have to confront Cullen. He owes me for saving his sorry ass and I aim to collect."

"How the hell do you plan on doing that? He can't get her out of there for you."

"He can make sure she is safe. A life for a life. Please let me pass." Aveline searched her friends eyes. She let out a sigh and moved to let her friend pass. "Thank you," Leigh started off in the direction she had been heading before turning back to Aveline, "Aveline, I would have done something stupid if you hadn't stopped me. I still might, but again thank you. Please can you try to comfort my mother, my uncle sorely lacks the skill."

"Of course, please behave I don't have enough pull to get your ass out of the fire if you decide to commit murder." The rouge nodded to her friend and disappeared into the crowd in Lowtown. Flashes of her old life played in her head, a life she had tried so hard to forget. The life she had when she was at her happiest. Her father was still alive, her family was in tact and well established in Lothering. Leigh had found a man she thought she could learn to love after losing the man who captured her heart and soul. She had given Cullen everything, her heart, her body, even her confidence, then he betrayed her by hunting her family. Leigh had hoped that when he had been sent to the Tower on Lake Calenhad she would never see him again, he would disappear from her memory. Fate had other ideas. When trying to help a young woman find her wayward Templar brother Leigh ran into her old flame again, even saved his life before realizing who it was. She was thankful that she had a hood covering her face so he would not know it was her.

"Cullen." His name come out of her mouth like bitter root. She had not even noticed that she had made it to the Gallows, til she heard the monotone voice's of the Tranquil that wandered the square. Leigh knew where Templar Hall was after Anders pointed it out to her one morning while buying potions for the clinic. A resurgence of fury woke in her. Part of her wanted to storm in there and take as many of them as she could before they could drop her. The sane part of her knew if she did that her sister would be in danger or worse killed because of her actions. After taking a few deep breaths she walked up to the gate of the Hall. "Excuse me Ser, could I have a moment of your time?"

"Can I help you serah?" The Templar in front of her was hardly old enough to be considered a man, let alone wield a sword. Leigh by most standards was considered a extreme beauty. Her black hair, porcelain skin, and her haunting gray eyes which looked like they could pierce into your soul. She never really ever tried to use it to her advantage, always preferring stealth and skill to help her obtain what she needed. Leigh gave the Templar a bewitching smile as she began to play with the front of his breast plate. A rolling shiver went right through the poor man and he became putty in her hands.

"I was told to talk to Knight Captain Cullen, but I am not sure where he is. Is there anyway you could point me to him or ask him to come out here and meet me?"

"He is in the Hall processing a new mage. I would let you pass, but the Knight Commander would have my head, serah. I could ask him to come out and meet you once he is done. May I ask who is waiting for him?"

"I would prefer not to give my name right now, but give him this, he will know who it is from." She handed the Templar an earring. A questioning look passed over the his face, but he took the earring from her hand.

"It might be a bit before he comes out."

"It is fine I can wait. Thank you, Ser for your help." She watched him go through the door knowing it would only be a matter of time before her ex-lover would come to see her. Leigh stuffed her rage down, a angry rogue normally ended up being a dead rogue. She had to be smart about this, for her sister's sake. It did not take long for twilight to settle on Kirkwall and still Cullen had not come out. Leigh stayed in the shadows watching the doors for any sign of movement. Her patience paid off long after the square emptied and night had fallen. Cullen was not in his armor as he looked for her.

"Leigh?" The sound of her name coming from his lips made her body shiver against her will. He walked deeper into the shadows giving her every opportunity to take his life if she had wanted to. "Leigh, it's Cullen, please come out you have nothing to fear from me."

"No I don't, do I? Only poor defenseless mages do." A small feeling of satisfaction came when he jumped at her voice. "It has been a long time Cullen."

"I did not know what to think when Simon handed me the earring I gave you all those years ago. When we parted last you told me you never wanted to see me again, how long have you been in Kirkwall?"

"Over a year. My family and I came here after the Blight took Lothering." She kept her voice neutral, it took all of her will to do so, but so far she was not going to let her anger get the better of her.

"I prayed to the Maker you were safe when I heard about Lothering. I...I have missed you Leigh." A bitter laugh sounded form her and echoed off the stone walls.

"Is it me you missed or was it the fact I was the only person who let you touch them?"

"No...why would you think that?" Confusion and pain crossed his face as he reached for her. Leigh flinched and backed away.

"Why! You have the balls to ask me that. You and your Templar friends came to my home and tried to take my father away from me. It did not matter to you that he was on his death bed and could not fight back. It was painful enough to watch him waste away, then I had to hear your leader say he would put him out of his misery. Like my father was a lame horse and not a person. Now I come home from risking my neck in the Deep Roads to try to make a better life for my family and I find my sister had been taken just this morning by low and behold you. And you have the gall to ask me why. You sodding bastard!"

"Bethany is your sister? Leigh I had no idea, I swear I did not know."

"Bullshit! I came here with ever intention to kill you Cullen. If it wasn't for the fact you owe me for saving your sorry ass a few months ago I would."

"What do you mean you saved me? When...how?"

"Remember Wilmod? The one you went after by yourself like a fool." Cullen nodded numbly. "The hooded woman who came to you rescue, well that would be me. My sister and I both saved you from becoming a snack for those demons. You owe me and Bethany for your life, now what I want is for you to make sure my sister remains safe in that hell hole. If you will do that I will call us even and spare your life."

"Leigh...you have my word. No harm will come to her as long as I draw breath."

"That is all I ask, but know this if I hear that she is hurt or worse I swear I will tear Kirkwall apart and take every Templar with me." She finally stepped out of the shadow she had been standing in. Letting Cullen get an eye full of her.

"You have changed since I saw you last. If it is possible you could rival Andraste in beauty. I never wanted to hurt you Leigh, I loved you. I still love you, whether you believe it or not. Your sister will be safe, the First Enchanter has already taken a liking to her. He is rather impressed she know as much as she does."

"My father taught her and he was a good man, a good mage, not the monster the Chantry tries to make free mages out to be."

"Mages can be dangerous, I have seen it with my own eyes."

"Well if you did not treat them like they were less than dirt, you might not have the crazed ones who turn to blood magic just to be free. I guess your lyrium addled mind can't grasp that." The look of hurt that played on his face made her regret saying it. Deep down she could still remember what it was like sitting up with him when he went through withdrawal. Pangs of longing hit her, but she shook them off. She needed to get away from him, from the feelings he was waking in her. "I need to get back to my family, what is left of it. Goodbye Cullen, remember if anything happens to me sister you will be the first I will find." Leigh backed into the shadows again, disappearing into the night leaving a very shaken up Cullen alone. After she made sure she was far enough away she let herself break down and cry. She wandered Kirkwall alone because she could not face her mother. She did not care where she ended up or if she lived to see the dawn.

The word of Bethany's capture had spread to almost all the rest of Hawke's companions. Anders and Merill were nowhere to be found. Knowing full well they must have heard about the raids on mages and were in hiding, Varric paced the floor in the Hanged Man. He made a mental note to add this to one more thing his brother's treachery had cost them. The trinket he was going to give Bethany was clutched firmly in his hand, to the point it bit into his skin.

"There has to be some way to get her out of there, right? If we could get her out I can get her on a ship til things blow over."

"If we try to help her Isabela we will get her killed. The Templars will not show mercy." Aveline sighed, knowing the pirate's intentions were in the right place.

"I know, it's just...well it ain't bloody fair. I never got to take her shopping or show her how to land a man, then steal him blind. She had such potential." Before Aveline could chew her out Isabela jumped up to greet the man that walked through the door. "Anders bout time you got here."

"I was swamped at the clinic. I didn't even get through my door before I was bombarded by patients." He looked around at their faces and at once he knew something was wrong. "Why does it looked like someone died?" It dawned on him he had not seen their fearless leader, a cold feeling ran up his spine. He asked the question he wasn't sure he wanted answered. "Where's Leigh?"

"We don't know. The Templars took Bethany this morning, right before all of you got back." Isabela slung back her drink and shook her head sadly.

"What!" He could feel the slow burn of anger make it's way through him. Justice squirmed, but he held him back.

"I saw Hawke right after she found out. I have never seen her like that ever in the time I have known her. She looked haunted and murderous at the same time. I talked her down as much as I could, but...I should never have let her go off on her own."

"I doubt even you could have stopped her Red, she is not one to be talked out of anything once she set her mind to it."

"I know, but if something happens I will be the one who has to try to bring her in. I don't want to do that Varric."

"I know Red, I know. Now that your here Blondie, we best go looking for her before she does something rash and we lose her too." Varric had not even finished his sentence and Anders was already at the door. Panic was setting in and he did not completely know why. He cared about her sure, all of them did. She was a capable woman whose compassion knows no bounds, but it was deeper than that. This feeling was new, strange, almost painful at least now fearing losing her. This feeling made it hard to keep Justice at bay. "Blondie wait, you can't just go running around out there all willy nilly or you will end up in the Gallows too. We need to go together, safety in numbers."

"Sorry , I am just..." The look on the others faces told him they felt the same. "We need to find her."

"Let's go. Knowing Hawke she probably headed for the Gallows to give the Templars a piece of her mind."

Let's hope that is all she did." They left the Hanged Man heading toward the Gallows. As they rounded the corner Aveline who was in the lead slammed into Merill. "Merill! Are you alright?"

"Yes, but Hawke isn't." The guard hauled Merill to her feet. "I followed her after I saw the two of you talk in the marketplace. She went to the Gallows and waited to see the Templar who took Bethany. I stayed hidden. The Templar came out, they talked, she yelled at him and then she left. She wandered a while then she went into the Chantry."

"Is she still there?"

"She is, but she started to tear the place apart. I tried to stop her, but she ignored me. Sebastian stopped her and asked me to come get her mother. I have never seen her like that. Poor Hawke, she looked so lost."

"Aveline go get Leandra. The rest of us will go ahead and see to Hawke. Hopefully we can calm her down. I am taking bets on if she gave Chantry boy a black eye, any takers?" Varric was trying to be funny, but even his voice sounded thick with worry. It did not take the group long to get to the Chantry and the sight that greeted them made even Isabela gasp. Sticking out of the large ornate wooden doors were Hawke's daggers buried to their hilts.

"Maker's breath!" Leandra breathed. Aveline put her hand on the older woman's shoulder and guided her into the chapel. The scene in front of them would have broken the heart of a cold hearted man. Leigh was on the floor in front of the statue of Andraste with her arms wrapped around her knees. Sebastian heard their footsteps as they got closer and got up to meet them.

"She has calmed down a bit, but I fear she would hurt herself if I let her try to go home. I thought it best to send for her friends to help her. The Grand Cleric was with her only a few moments ago."

"Thank you for staying with her til we arrived." Leandra went to her daughter's side and wrapped her arms around her. Anders shifted back and forth on his feet, he was uneasy being here. Images of his friend Karl played in his head. Leigh had been so kind to him after that, now it was his turn to help her. He watched her mother try to coax her to come home, but Hawke would not move or talk for that matter. Even Aveline could not get her to move. After a deep breath Anders went and knelt in front of her, taking her hands in his. Leigh looked up at him and her expression broke his heart.

"Leigh we need to get you out of here. Your mother needs you, we need you." She nodded slowly and moved to get off the floor. He pulled her up and let her wrap her arms around him to steady herself. "It is not your fault, it is theirs. Never forget that." He whispered in her ear. She pushed back from him to look him in the eye.

"They will have to get through me to get to you or Merill. I will not let them do this again." Her voice was shaky, but her eyes started to show the strength he had come to know. "Sebastian, please forgive my destructive outburst. I will pay for whatever damage I have done."

"You have nothing to apologize for Hawke. I am here if you even need to talk. You helped me with finding the people who murdered my family I owe you a great deal."

"Thank you Sebastian." She gave the exiled prince a small smile. He bowed and left them to go clean up the mess she had made. A small twinge of jealously ran through Anders til she rested her head against his neck. He tightened his embrace around her waist and led her out of the Chantry. He wanted nothing more than to take her pain away. He had not meant to, but he cared for her more than just a friend. After getting her home safe Anders headed back to his clinic. He tried to quiet his mind and Justice. He kept thinking back to her visit after Karl died. The image of her fighting the Templars was burned into his and Justice's memory, but the conversation they had after here in the clinic was even clearer.

He was pacing the floor waiting for the Templars to come. He knew after what Hawke's little group just saw they would turn him in. Even after her hushed words telling him to honor Karl's request to end his life Anders did not trust Hawke enough to put it passed her bringing the Templars down here. A soft knock on the clinic door made him pause. Freedom's Call was leveled at the door as it opened slowly.

"Anders?" Leigh poked her head in, he could still see stains from the Templars' blood on her face. It looked like she had tried to wipe them off, but failed. "Anders, are you here?" He stayed in the darkness that encompassed the back part of the clinic afraid to move. Leigh set her dagger belt down on one of the crates and slowly walked toward where he was hiding. "Maker where is he? I hope the Templars haven't found him." From his position he could see the look of worry on her face, but not fear as he would have expected if she was bait to trap him with. She searched the other side of the place and stopped when she came to his desk.

"_Shit! She is going to see the manifesto."_ Leigh sat on the edge of the makeshift desk and started to read. Her head gave involuntary nods as she read the first few paragraphs.

"This sounds like something my father would have written." Anders could not take it anymore and came out of the shadows.

"Is it now?" Leigh jumped a bit and put the pages down. "Why would your father right about freeing mages?"

"Because he was one. He was an apostate."

"He was?"

"Yes, he fled with my mother to Ferelden so they could have a life together. I hate the very idea of any mage being locked up or...I'm so sorry about your friend Anders. He deserved better than that."

"You mean that don't you?"

"Yes I do. If that happened to my sister, Maker I would bath this city in blood for revenge. It is barbaric." The passion of her words set him more at ease. Anders sighed and sat down next to her. "I do have to ask though, what was the turning all blue and glowy in the Chantry?"

"Ah that, well I..." He took a deep breath trying to think of the words to explain his fuse with Justice. A warm hand took his and gave it a gently squeeze. He looked up into Leigh's ghostly gray eyes. He saw no fear in her eyes and the words started pouring out of his mouth. Leigh to her credit sat and listened keeping her face neutral. Once he had finished talking she said something that caught him completely off guard.

"So that explains the whole sexy tortured look."

"I guess I should look in a looking glass more often. I had not thought I would ever find a woman that would see pass what I just said."

"You will find Anders not much phases me. When you grow up on the run and watch your sister set your brother's bed on fire, not much gets to you."

"You are unlike anyone I have ever met Hawke."

"What is it with everyone calling me Hawke? I do have a first name you know, there are times I would like to hear it."

"And that name would be?"

"Leigh."

"Alright Leigh I will try very hard to use your first name from now on. My maps are your and so am I if you have need of me."

"Thank you Anders and don't worry your secret is safe with me." Leigh stood up giving his hand on more squeeze. "Also if you ever need any help let me know. I am no healer, but I can bandage like a pro."

"Be careful I might take you up on that." He watched her head for the door and he found he did not want her to leave. "Leigh..."

"Yes?"

"Thank you, for your help with Karl. He was a true friend and you were right he deserved peace."

"Your very welcome. I will come by and see you tomorrow, unless you want to meet the rest of us at the Hanged Man tonight. We normally play Wicked Grace and drink, but we have a good time."

"I don't think they would want me around."

"Why because you glow? I will keep them off your back and it will give me a chance to properly thank you for the maps."

"I...I will be there then. Til tonight Haw...Leigh."

"See you tonight Anders." A small smile crept up on his face thinking of that day and everyday since. Seeing her like that on the Chantry floor tonight hurt. The way she clung to him made her seem so fragile. He hated leaving her in that hovel of her uncle's, but bringing her here would have been worse. Justice began nagging him about the thoughts he was having about Leigh, but again he ignored his passenger. Anders spent the entire night staring at the ceiling aching for a woman he knew he could never have.


	4. Chapter 4

The three years after the Deep Roads was a whirl wind for Hawke and her friends. She and Varric worked tirelessly to sell the artifacts they had found. Once that was done Leigh petitioned the Viscount to get her grandparent's estate back. It took time, but finally all the pieces fell into place. During those three years Leigh became closer to all of her companions. Whether it was helping Aveline with situations her guard was not quite qualified for, teaching Fenris to read, or going for walks with Merill, Leigh found a sense of contentment. None of them would ever replace Bethany, but they made it easier for her to cope with the loss. The last few months she had been running around with Isabela learning how to become a duelist. A small part of her wished she could be as free as Isabela seemed to be. Do what you want, be with who you want with no real care or fear of consequence, but Leigh could never be that cut off from people. It was not who she was and to her it seemed a little lonely. After three years Leigh could not see her life any other way then what it was now.

A soft knock at her bedroom door rousted her from her dreams. Her mother's soft voice sounded from the other side of the door. "A messenger dropped off a letter for you. It looks important." Leigh opened her door and her mother shook her head. "You look a frightful sight when you first wake up my darling. If I am to ever find you a suitor I will have to make sure they never see you in the morning."

"I spent most of night helping Anders in the clinic. I got in maybe two hours ago."

"You have been spending a lot of time down there helping him. He seems to be a nice young man, very handsome and a bit dangerous so I hear."

"He is not dangerous, just dedicated." Leandra gave her daughter an appraising look before laughing and shaking her head. "What? Why are you laughing?"

"I think I should hold off on finding you a suitor. I think you might have found one already. The only advice I can give you me dear is it will not be a easy life loving an apostate. If I was given the choice to be with you father again or marry the Comte, I would choose your father every time. Just be careful, he is a target for the Templars."

"I'm not sure if it matters anyway. He...I'm not sure if he feels the same way. I just feel more alive when I am with him, even if it is helping him patch up a refugee or sitting with him in the Hanged Man with all the others."

"He would be a fool not to feel the same, but I am bias. Have you told him how you feel?"

"Maker, no! I wouldn't know what to say."

"I am sure you could figure out something to say, but I will let you handle this yourself."

"I appreciate that, Mama. Let me see what the message is." After getting dressed Leigh headed down the stairs to her desk. It was the letter she had been waiting for. "Mama, when is the next time you will see Bethany?"

"Today, why?"

"She will be receiving a new staff and I want to know if she likes it. I did not have it enchanted since I did not know what she would want, but since I can't go visit her myself I hope it let's her know I still think of her."

"I am sure she will love it."

"I have to go pick up the other two later today."

"The other two?"

"I had two others made. One for Merill and another for Anders."

"You take such good care of everyone. You are your father's daughter." Leigh gave her mother a quick hug before heading to the cellar. It was a quick way to Darktown since it opened out right near to the clinic. Both of the doors were closed telling her that Anders was most likely sleeping. He had had a rough night of healing. With it being winter there were many people suffering from frostbite and sickness. Last night he barely was able to keep up with it all, having used up his store of potions. Leigh quietly opened the door finding the place dark. All the beds were empty save one. She could hear him tossing and turning. He had told her since becoming a Grey Warden he has not had a good night sleep. Too many nightmares about darkspawn and Archdemons he told her.

"_I am going to let him sleep. He always looks so tired. I will come back later hopefully he won't be bombarded with patients."_ As she went to leave she bumped into a small table knocking the glass containers that were on it to the ground. The sound made Anders shoot up from his bed, the blue glow of Justice illuminated the room. Leigh barely got out way of a lightning bolt. She backflipped over one of the cots, but lost her footing on one of the bottles that survived the fall off the table. Another bolt missed her by inches, the smell of ozone burned her nose. "Anders wait, it's Leigh." He hesitated as he tried to get back his control. The blue light faded pitching the room back into darkness.

"Le...Leigh?" Gingerly she got off the floor and went to him. Her hand found his shoulder, even in the dark her awareness of her surroundings was keen. "Here let me light a lamp." The light of a small lantern cast a dim light to the room. "I...your not hurt are you?" His expression and his voice were pained.

"No, just my pride and my backside." She gave him a warm smile. He opened his mouth to say something, but her finger silenced him. "It is not your fault. I should not have come in here knowing full well you had a very long night. I was clumsy and knocked over the glass. So don't you dare try to apologize." He looked away from her, guilt on his face. Leigh raised her hands to make him look at her and noticed her one hand was bleeding badly. "Maker, how did I do that?" Anders head snapped back to face her and saw her hand. A large piece of glass was imbedded in the palm of her left hand. The cut was deep almost to bone. Strangely even now that she had noticed it there was not pain.

"Come over here near the light so I can get this fixed up. Does it hurt?"

"No, I did not even know I had hurt myself." Anders went to work cleaning the wound out before sending healing magic into the wound. The magic felt warm as it flashed over her skin. His touch was light, passing over her skin as the skin rewove itself whole. "I'm sorry I startled you. It was my fault." He just looked at her and shook his head.

"There all better." His hand lingered on hers, his eyes silently pleaded for forgiveness. Again she gave him a smile that could melt all the snow on the Frostback Mountains. She took his hand and brought it up to her lips, kissing it before she let it go. Both of them blushed.

"I came down here to see what you needed since I am heading to the potion maker near the Gallows. I know we used most of your store up last night. I did not want you to have a run like you did and be without."

"Are you sure you are a human?" A questioning look crossed her face. "I am just asking because I have only ever met two people like you. Your compassion knows no bounds."

"I can not sit by while my fellow countrymen suffer, not if I can help. As my mother said I am my father's daughter. We did not want for much when I was growing up, but even when we had hard times my father always tried to help people worse off than ourselves."

"I am sorry I will never know him." A shadow of sorrow shown on her face. Anders wanted to kick himself, first off for the attack and secondly for bringing up something the caused her pain. "Well, now that I am awake I can go with you to get the supplies. That is if you want me too." He gave her a look that made her knees weak.

"Of course, I always welcome company, but I ask for one condition."

"That being?" He crossed his arms over his chest readying himself for another fight about why they could not be together.

"You come back to my home and get a good meal in you before you come back here." His arms fell and he relaxed, thanking the Maker for small favors. He did not want to fight with her, not after Justice almost killed her.

"If that is what you wish then yes I will. Be warned I can eat more than my fair share."

"Good, you are getting too thin. It will be nice to see you eat for once. Let us be off then, I would leave you staff behind if I were you. There are a lot more Templars stationed outside the Gallows now. I don't want to give them any cause to try to take you. It would kill me if the Templars lock you up or worse."

"As you wish." He did not like leaving his staff behind, but Leigh was right it would be too dangerous. Knowing her she would try to defend him and get herself hurt or worse killed. His stomach turned even thinking about it. If he died for the cause he has been fighting for so be it, but he made a silent vow that he would burn the world to keep her safe. Even if that meant his death, for her he would die and not think twice about it.

The walk to the Gallows was uneventful yet freezing The crisp winter air chilled Leigh down to the bone. She cursed herself for not wearing a thicker undertunic. She rubbed her arms in an attempt to warm them up. "Maker, I hate the winter. I can never get warm." She heard Anders give a low chuckle before wrapping his arm around her. He was warm despite the icy wind. Leigh pressed herself closer to him not caring if it was improper to do so.

"I will say the winters here are worse than the ones in Ferelden."

"When I was younger my mother could not get me back into the house when it snowed, now all I want to do is sit by the fire snuggled next to Tovis."

"Tovis?" She saw the jealous look on his face and started to giggle.

"Tovis is my Mabari hound. So wipe that look off your face." "_What are you doing Anders? She is a distraction you do not need. Our cause suffers while you pine after her."_

"_Shut up! My private life is none of your business. If I want to pursue her then I will."_

"_Do you think she will do what needs to be done? Will she be willing to do whatever it takes even if it means the lives of innocents?" _

"Are you arguing with him again?" Her voice snapped him out of his war with Justice.

"Is it that obvious?" Leigh nodded and gave his hand a squeeze. "Sorry, he thinks been out here with out my staff is dangerous. He does not approve." "_That is not what I said!" _

"Well I will protect you, so tell him you will be fine. I will not let the big bad Templars get you. Speaking of Templars they are out in force." The Gallow's square was filled with Templars some coming on duty and some coming off of it.

"Let's not draw too much attention to ourselves shall we."

My thoughts exactly...shit! Will I never be rid of him?" The anger in her voice surprised him. He followed her line of sight to find out who she was talking about. The Templar had his back to them so Anders could not see his face. "You were in the Circle in Ferelden right?"

"Yes, why do I have a bad feeling about this."

"He was a Templar there, I don't want him to get the chance to recognize you. Let's try to go around this way."

"Why do you hate him so much?"

"Other than he took my sister from me, I...I use to love him." Her voice dropped to a whisper. He could hear her grind her teeth. If looks could kill the Templar would have keeled over by this point from both of their looks.

"So he is the Templar you told me about? Do you want me to shoot lightning at him?" Despite the anger coursing through her veins she laughed at him.

"No, Maker you will have them all descend on you like vultures. I appreciate it though. It is times like these I miss Carver more than ever. Even though he was younger than me he played the protective brother, especially after my father passed."

"Brothers do that, at least from what I have been told. The faster we get the potions the faster we can get out of here. Damn, here comes trouble." Leigh saw a Templar coming their way. She blow out a sigh of relief when she saw it was Ser Thrask.

"Ser Thrask, it is nice to see you again."

"And you too Serah Hawke. Your sister was very happy with her new staff. The other things you ordered are waiting for you at your estate."

"Thank you, I am glad you could help me with this."

"It was my pleasure after all the help you have given me. You have done this city a great service. I must to go to my post before the Knight Captian see us talking. Good day Serah."

"Good Day Ser Thrask." She watched Thrask walk away then turned to Anders. "I wish all the Templars were like him maybe then the world would be a better place."

"For a Templar he is not half bad, but he is still a Templar. So what did you order that you had to get his help to do it?

"The staff for my sister and a few odds and ends that are hard to come by, nothing important."

"Why do I have the feeling you are being sneaky?" Leigh just gave him a disarming smile which made his stomach flip. He had noticed that she did not smile at anyone else like that, just him. "Ah, it looks like Solivitus is at his stall we should get what we need and get out of here. This place is making me jumpy."

"Your right. Get whatever you need for the clinic, my treat."

"You are too good to me you know that right?" She just laughed and pushed him toward the vender. Solivitus greeted them both, then went on to show his wares. Many of the potions Anders needed cost much more than he himself would ever be able to pay. Leigh seemed unfazed by the price as the order grew. "Leigh are you sure you can afford all this?"

"I am sure, you need them, as do the people you help. It is my way of giving back to my countrymen who have not had the luck I have these last few years. I have no skill for healing or politics, but I can do this for them and for you. So please get what you need, I don't care how much it costs if it helps." He just stared at her in appreciation. "I like seeing you smile, you don't do it near enough."

"I very few things to smile about, but you my dear lady are one o thhose things." A flush of color blessed her cheeks. Her eyes even seemed brighter as she stared into his eyes. His resolve was crumbling and he knew it. How much more could he take before he gave into his want of her? He had only met one other person like her in his life and she had driven him just as crazy, but he had to leave her behind to save her from the Templars. "It looks like we have all we need for now, shall we." Anders waved his arm in front of him and bowed slightly before giving her his arm. To the outside world they would have looked like a young couple out for a stroll, though the Gallows was not the most romantic place for a walk. Neither of them noticed Cullen had spotted Leigh and was now heading in their direction.

"Leigh?" What brings you he..." Cullen was struck speechless. He knew the man who stood in front of him. Anders was thinner and older than he remembered, but he knew it was him. A cold feeling of dread hit him. Before he left Ferelden Cullen had heard rumors about the runaway mage. Most were not pleasant and now to see him arm in arm with Leigh, Cullen was not pleased to say the least.

"Is there something you need Knight Captain? I have much to do and have no time to dally." Leigh kept her voice steady, but her eyes burned with annoyance. She felt Anders grip on her hand tighten. Both men stared at each other waiting for the other to make a move. "Cullen, please I do not have all day. What do you want?"

"Leigh, I...I need you to come with me so we can speak in private."

"Whatever you have to say can be said in front of my companion. We hide nothing from each other."

"He is an apostate." A bitter laugh left her mouth.

"My, my do all you Templars see apostates lurching in the shadows. My friend here is no apostate, now if you have nothing else of intelligence to say then we will be on our way." Leigh turned on heals and went to walk away, but Cullen grasped her arm. "Let go Cullen!"

"He is a monster. Has he told you why he left the Wardens? Did he tell you what he did to Rolan?" She heard Anders breath hitch, and though his face remained placid his eyes shown fear.

"I have known him for three years Cullen, He is no monster." "_Oh but I am Leigh. You did not see what I did. Maker, if you knew..."_ "Now let go of me or so help me Cullen I will knock you flat on your arse."

"You would side with a malificar, a murder?" Faster than either man could see Leigh's hand made contact with Cullen's cheek. The sound of the slap caught some of the other Templar attention, bringing them running to aide their captain.

"How dare you! I side with a friend, one that has never given me a reason to doubt him. You on the other hand Cullen have all but torn my heart from my chest on more than one occasion. I learned from you to never, ever trust a Templar. You call him a murderer, well so am I Cullen and so are you." The other Templars surrounded them. Anders was desperately fighting to stay in control of Justice. Letting loose would be a mistake, but he would be damned if he would let them lay a finger on Leigh.

"Leigh, please be reasonable, I know you were raised by a mage, but he will get you killed. I won't let that happen, even if you hate me forever I will not let him hurt you." Leigh caught the blue flash in Anders' eyes. She prayed the Templars hadn't, so far it looks like they haven't. His body was shaking against her's and the grip on her arm got tighter, almost painful. "Step away from him, Leigh." Cullen's voice was soft and pleading. If she did not think of something soon she would lose him to the Templars. She was not willing to let that happen.

"No, you have to go through me to get to him Cullen. I don't think the Viscount will be very happy if you kill a noble. Do you?" The death grip on her arm was becoming unbearable. The fine blue glowing lines were starting to appear. She put her hand on the side of Anders' face hoping he was not to far gone. She leaned into him whispering in his ear. "Please, don't do this here. I won't let them take you away again I promise. You have to trust me." Anders turned his face to look her in the eye, pleading her to stop him. Leigh pulled his head closer to her and kissed him sweetly. The blue glow stopped as fast as it had come. She heard Cullen growl, but ignored him. Once she knew he was under control again she turned to Cullen, who looked like she had just ripped his heart out. "My friend and I are leaving. You have no proof of what he may or may not be, so you might be making a mistake one that will cost you dearly. Call off your knights." Cullen waved the knights off. "Thank you, come love we have places to be." She pulled Anders away from the square and the Templars. Neither of them talked til they got back to her estate. When they entered to estate Leigh was revealed to find her mother was out and would not be back for a while. "Bohdan please bring us some fruit and wine. We will be in the study."

"Yes, messere." She was grateful that the dwarf did not question the look on her face. She could only guess from the range of emotions that were running through her how they played on her face. Anders had seemed to calm down the further they got away from the Gallows. He could read the look on her face as one of relief and embarrassment. Leigh went to work on the fire in the study making sure it would not die. Anders sat down in one comfy high back chairs and just watched her.

"He still loves you." Leigh sat across from Anders in her study and let out a sigh. "That kiss you gave me stunned him."

"I did not know what else to do without screaming at Justice, which would have made them more suspicious."

"Well it got my attention." The smirk on his face told her he was not upset with her for the kiss. "So what is the story behind you and the Knight Captain?" Leigh rubbed her fingers on the bridge of her nose trying to think on how to talk about Cullen.

"He was posted in Lothering for a time before being sent to the Circle. Carver was his friend and introduced us. It wasn't love at first sight or anything like that, but he was kind and did not have the same view most Templars have about mages. There is five years between us and I was young, too young to get involved with anyone, but I did. Maker, what a fool I was."

"I doubt you were a fool. Love is a gift or so I have been told. I have never been in love." He was lying, but she did not need to know that. "So you fell for him, how did he break your heart?"

"I guess it is only fair me telling you this because you were honest about Justice. My father was dying for a blood infection, how he got it I would much rather not get into right now. He was not long for this world and the Templars came. I was thankful Bethany was not home at the time. Their leader spouted off the rules of the Chantry to us trying to make us give my father over to them. Carver and I refused, my poor mother was deep in grief and could only cry. The Templars grabbed us so the leader could go get my father. He was greeted with a man who was wasting away and could not even lift his own head. Cullen was with that group of Templars. I never told him about my family. I never truly trusted him. When the leader come out of my father's room he said and I quote "I can put him out of his misery for you then take his body so you don't have to deal with it. Apostates do not get proper funerals they are not worthy of them." I wanted to rip the man apart for talking about my father as if he were a lame horse or some pathetic creature not worthy of mercy and peace. Carver bless his soul, ran them off somehow I was too upset to hear what he said. My father went to the Maker two days later. We gave him a proper funeral and after the pyre was in embers Cullen came to see me. I screamed at him and even went as far as throwing my dagger at him. I missed, but he did not try to come near me again. I gave him everything I had and I felt he had betrayed me."

"He was lucky you missed, I have seen you throw those things you never miss."

"I was upset and it was seven years ago I was not as seasoned as I am now. So that is the story. Part of me will always care about him that is what stopped me from killing him the night he took my sister. Also the fact you and Merill would be without someone to watch over them if I went to prison." She smiled and shook her head. "I don't have any right to ask you this, but what was the thing about the man Rolen?" Anders grimaced as the memory of what he did played in his head again. "You know what, nevermind. I don't need to know. I trust you Anders that is all that matters."

"You shouldn't trust me. He was right I could hurt you or worse. You deserve better." Leigh closed the distance between them and cupped his chin forcefully making him look her in the eyes.

"We have been through this. I do not fear you or Justice. If I thought for a second you were not a good person I would have left you behind three years ago. I care about you, out of all of my friends I feel closer to you. Why do you keep pushing me away?"

"I do it to protect you. It would kill me to see you get hurt because of me." Leigh knelt in front of him still holding his chin and kissed him fiercely.

"I don't need to be protected from you." Before he could answer Bohdan came in with the refreshments. "Thank you Bohdan. Where are the packages that were delivered today?"

"They are by your desk Serah."

"I will be right back." Anders watched her leave the room. "_You are acting like a love sick adolescent." "I know, I know, just shut up Justice." "You are faltering from our mission." "I know full well what we are fighting for. She has just as much stake in this as I do. Leigh is the one bright point is this damned city. I will not lose her!" _"I have something for you. I hope you like it." He is eyes fell on the cloth wrapped gift. From the look of it he knew what it was, but was not prepared for what he saw when he unwrapped it. The staff was made of a rich cherry wood with a onyx core. It was a almost exact replica of the one he had now style wise, but this one was well made.

"Where did you get this?"

"I had it made for you, it is not enchanted since I did not know what you would want, but Sandel can handle that for you. Do you like it?"

"It is the most thoughtful thing anyone has done for me in a long time. Thank you." The smile that adorned his face was worth the world to her. "_She got me a gift. Maker, doesn't this woman know I can only resist so much before I break."_ "Is this what Thrask helped you with?"

"Yes, he has been very helpful. I wanted to do something to thank you for all the help you have given me these past three years. When ever you need me I will be there for anything. I hope you know that." "_You don't know what you are saying Leigh, but I am a selfish man I can't stay away from you. Nor do I want to try anymore. Andraste forgive me, I love her."_


	5. Chapter 5

Anders paced the floor of his clinic, his anger rising by the moment. Since spring had broke over Kirkwall he had noticed more and more mages in the Gallows walking around with tranquil brands on their heads. Most of them were good mages who had passed their Harrowing. Chantry law made it illegal to make a mage tranquil if they made it through the Harrowing. He had heard from his associates in the mage underground who had been doling out this atrocity. Ser Alrik, the same Templar who had made his good friend Karl tranquil. The rage boiled in his blood, making him thankful he had not patients in the clinic. The warm salty breeze blew in from the bay overpowering the smell of rot and despair he had grown accustom to. He took a few deep breaths to calm his fury. He had to have a clear head to put a stop to this or he would get himself killed.

"Sovereign for your thoughts?" He had not noticed Leigh standing in the doorway watching him pace. Her voice eased some of his rage. With her around he could think clearer, it was harder to lose himself to Justice. An idea hit him for a second, then was dismissed just as quickly. He wanted to ask her help, but he feared for her safety if it went badly.

"I guess I am just going a little stir crazy with nothing to do. Please come in, I can make us some tea if you have time to stay." She pushed off the door jam and walked up to him like a stalking cat. Her new leather armor was light weight and showed off her curves. She had chosen dark charcoal gray making it easier for her to hide in the shadows. The shoulders were cut out as were a thin line that showed her belly button. The long leather vest coat dragged on the floor and swayed with her hips. Anders cursed in his head as naughty thoughts came to mind. She was driving him mad more and more each day.

"Tea sounds lovely, thank you." She looked around and noticed again no patients were present. It was just the two of them. "It has been a while since I have seen this place this quiet. No wonder you are going crazy."

"You would think I would welcome the peace of it, but it is too quiet. It makes me think that something disastrous might happen." She sat down on his cot not realizing it. When he turned back around he froze for a moment. More thoughts that were not proper came to his mind. They were alone after all, why shouldn't he just give into her. He shook his head to clear away the lustful images and handed her a cup. "How are things up in Hightown?"

"Snooty as ever. My neighbor told me off for having all manner of people coming in and out of my house. She swears I am running either a brothel or a mercenary band. My poor mother had to try to calm her fears. It did not help that Isabela was there at the time and cursed out the old bat out. I had to bite my lip to stop from laughing. I never wanted to be a noble, but my mother is happy that is what matters. She has lost so much since my father died. She deserves to be comfortable and I am glad to be out of Gamlen's house. He is family so I do care about him, but he is not my favorite person." She wrinkled her nose and gave a mock shutter. "So if you are so bored fancy coming with me and doing a few jobs?"

"I...I have something I wanted to ask you first, though it might be dangerous." He shifted his weight and stared at the floor. He heard the clink of her cup as she put it down, then the groan of his cot as she stood up to come over next to him. With her being shorter than him she could look up into his eyes even with his head hung low.

"All you have to do is ask, whatever it is I will help you. Even if it is to put Meredith's head on a pike." A nervous laugh broke from his lips remembering what he said to her the first time he met her.

"Have you been up to the Gallows lately?" She nodded placing a hand on his forearm. "Have you noticed all the Tranquil that are now walking around of late?"

"Yes I have. Bethany has stated some things about it in her letters. She questions why there are so many and even stated who she thinks might be doing it. It is rather alarming."

"Did she say who?"

"A Templar named Ser Alrik. Nasty piece of work that has been in the Gallows for years at least that is what Thrask has told me."

"Yes he is. I have had a few run ins with him these last three years. He is making Tranquil out of mages who have passed their Harrowing. By Chantry law they should be safe, but they are not."

"What do you mean run ins? Has he come down here and threatened you?" A warm feeling ran through him at the sound of her concern and outrage.

"The last time he came after me was when he set the trap for me with Karl. Though the coward did not show himself that day. When I first came to Kirkwall he tried to hunt me, but could never find me. I heard he even went as far as requesting my phylactery from Ferelden. I guess they did not give it to him or he would have caught me years ago." The look of horror on Leigh's face made him stop and stare at her.

"Please don't tell me this. I worry enough that the Templars might take you away when I'm not around. You make me want to lock you away somewhere to keep you safe."

"No one is locking me away again, not even you sweetheart." Anders poked her with his elbow gently and gave her a warmhearted smirk. "Though I bet you would treat your prisoners better than any Templar ever would."

"I guess you will never know since you won't let me keep you prisoner." Leigh batted her eyes at him as a wicked smile adorned her face. "_She is baiting you." "I know she is. Thank you for stating the obvious Justice." "I will never understand mortals." "Come on you can't tell me that spirits don't know about love." "Only the spirits of compassion know what love is." Do I detect a bit of bitterness in that statement?" "That is none of you business, as you so enjoy telling me." "Ah, a sore spot I see." "As your companion Aveline likes to tell you, Shut it Anders." _"Hello...Anders?"

"Sorry, blanked there for a moment."

"Justice giving you hell again?"

"No, yes. He was just voicing his opinion, rather loudly I might add."

"It is not a problem, I have gotten use to it these last three years. So back to the matter at hand. Is there anyway to prove he is doing this without permission of the Chantry?"

"I have a way of sneaking into the Gallows, but you have to swear never to tell anyone about it. It is a way for the Mage Underground to get mages out and free." Leigh crossed her heart comically, but her eyes told him she took this all very seriously, as he knew she would. She had done so much for mages since coming to Kirkwall, most of the time without any sort of reward.

"We will go tonight. Should I ask Varric if he wants to come or do you just think we can handle it." The thought of doing this alone with her was very appealing to him. Out of all their friends, Leigh was the sneakiest. She even gave Isabela a run for her coin, but there was safety in numbers.

"I think just you and I should be able to handle it. It will be a quick sneak in and out hopefully. I will meet you up by Tomwise after sunset."

"I will be there."

The day seemed to drag on for Anders as he waited for nightfall. He filled the hours with menial tasks around his clinic. Once sun began to set he made his way to the elf's stall. His mind was thinking ahead to what they would have to do he did not notice where he was going til he slammed into Leigh. The top of her head cracked him hard on the chin making him see stars.

"Anders? Maker are you alright?"

"I will be once I stop seeing spots in front of my eyes. Has anyone ever told you that you have a hard head?"

"More than once. I am so sorry I wasn't paying attention. Do you want to sit down for a moment?" He chuckled and shook his head.

"No, just remind me to never get you mad enough to headbutt me. You know if we ever need a battering ram we could use you." She glared at him, but a small smile pulled at the corners of her mouth. He winced waiting for her to smack him, instead she rose up on her toes and kissed his sore jaw lightly. A small shiver of pleasure ran through him. He hoped she did not notice, but knew better. Leigh noticed everything.

"If we use anyone as a battering ram it would most likely be Fenris or Aveline. They have the most armor and enjoy plowing through things. Are you sure your alright?"

"I am fine. We should go and get this done as fast as we can. If we get caught I want you to run. I don't want you to get hurt."

"If we get caught then we fight our way out, together. I will not leave you behind to their mercy." Anders gave her a annoyed sigh, but did not argue. They made their way to the secret entrance located in a very dark, desolate corner of Darktown. The tunnels were well lit much to their surprise. "I thought this was a secret tunnel why are there torches lit?"

"These tunnels are also used by lyrium smugglers who supply the Templars. We need to be careful." Leigh was able to sneak them around most of the smugglers. Further in they heard the screams of a woman pleading for her life. A cold feeling came over Leigh, it was the same feeling she always got when Templars were around. Anders ran off ahead of her before she could stop him. He stopped at a passage door and carefully looked around the corner. There stood a small group of Templars surrounding a young girl. She was on her knees sobbing and pleading to go home. The girl looked younger than Bethany it was all Leigh could do to stop herself from running in the room.

Justice began to push at Anders to act. It took all of his will to hold back. He knew if he attacked he might hurt the girl or worse he would hurt Leigh. He wished they had brought others with them now at least then if it turned to a fight they had help. The more he listened to Ser Alrik's threats to young mage the harder Justice fought him. He wanted to run even though he knew it was a cowardly move. This is what he was fighting, corrupt Templars who used their position to oppress mages. So hard was his struggle that he did not notice Leigh creep into the cavern. Both of her Dalish daggers drawn and ready. It wasn't til her voice boomed in the room that he lost all his control.

"If you dare touch that girl I will slit your throat Alrik. Now back away."

"You will die for trying to help this blood mage escape." Alrik pulled his sword readying his attack.

"What, no I am not a blood mage. Please messere help me. I just want to see my parents again." Alrik turned and backhanded her. A roar from behind her left Leigh's blood cold. The cavern was bathed in a bright blue light making even the Templars back up in fear."

"You will never touch another mage again!" Anders ran passed her straight for Alrik. She knew he would never stand a chance against them all, even with Justice's power to help.

"_You can't kill them all Hawke. Some of them are innocent. They are following the orders of their superiors." "I will do my best, but if they force me to I will not hesitate to save him or that girl. They are my priority." "Understood, I will help if I can."_ A sense of calm came over Leigh as she fought to hold off the other Templars. Using her knock-out flasks and pressure point blows she made short work of the half dozen Templars that surrounded them. Her battle was over before Anders' was. She could only watch the man she has come to care for trade blows with Alrik. She could see he was wounded, but he made no attempt to heal himself, he just kept fighting. "_If he keeps fighting like this he will lose. Those wounds are sapping his strength." "Then I guess it is up to me to stop it. I will not lose him, I can't." "I know Hawke I know."_

"Give up mage you can not keep this fight up for much longer." Justice growled and charged at Alrik hoping to knock the heavily armored man off balance. His staff missed it mark and he saw a flash of steel heading for his neck. The twang of metal hitting metal rang out loudly in his ears as a jagged dagger stop the sword from hitting it's target. Alrik flew back from a snap kick to his face. Leigh had placed herself between Alrik and him, she was panting and sweaty, but otherwise unharmed.

"Try that again, I dare you."

"Out of the way bitch and I will finish this. Your little daggers are no match for my armor." Leigh gave Alrik a wicked smile before running at him. Alrik readied his shield and sword to defend off her attack, but he was not prepared for what she did next. With a flash of smoke she vanished right before his eyes. His eyes went wild looking around for her. "Show yourself!" Justice moved forward to start the fight again, but another flash of smoke made him hold his action. Alirk's eyes went wide and he tried to scream. All that came out was a bloody gurgle as Leigh's dagger twisted in his lung. Her other dagger moved quickly across his throat finishing him off.

"You will never hurt another mage again Alrik. Maker have mercy on your soul." She let his body fall to the cavern floor. "Justice let Anders heal himself now. Justice?" A small gasp of fear came from were she had left the girl.

"Get away from me, demon!"

"I am no demon!" The anger in his voice. "Have you never seen a spirit of the Fade. I feel the Templars hold on you, you are their slave."

"Anders stop the Templars have been taken care of."

"She is theirs and should not be aloud to live."

"She is a mage and she is also the reason you are fighting. Do not turn on her now Justice or you are no better than a demon." Justice turn around and snarled at her. At least with his attention on her the young mage was safe for the moment.

"I told him you would be trouble, that you would not understand our cause. If you side with them than you will share their fate." Justice raised his arm to call forth a spell as Leigh readied herself for the attack. If she fought him she knew she might have to hurt him or worse. It was not a thought she liked, then again neither was dying.

"Anders please don't do this. Please come back to me." She turned to the young mage who still was horror stricken by the sight in front of her and screamed. "Run as fast as you can now!" The girl did not think twice , she bolted like a scared rabbit and disappeared through the passageway. "It is just you and me now Justice. I don't want to fight you, but I will." Tears streamed down her cheeks. "_Please I can't hurt him. I will never forgive myself if I do." _Justice let loose a bolt of lightning at her, the air sizzled around Leigh, but did not hit it's mark. A red bubble surrounded her, protecting her from the blast. Her amulet pulsed like a beating heart making Justice pause with confusion. A thin beam of light burst from the red jewel hitting the mage in the heart. The blue light in his eyes faded as he fell to his knees. The shield that had been protecting Leigh dissipated as did the glow from her amulet. "Anders?" "_He will be fine Hawke, I only stopped Justice by making him sleep for now. You need to get him out of here soon. More Templars might come looking for their fellows." "I don't understand. Why his he so violent?" "Justice when mixed with fury turns to vengeance. Vengeance does not know mercy it is too blinded by hate. Anders hatred for what has been done to him has twisted Justice in to Vengeance." "But why am I or you not the same way?" "I am not bonded to you like they are. We are two separate entities. We can discuss this later. You must hurry now and get him away from here." "Thank you Pash, if you hadn't stopped him I..." "Do not think about that now, he is safe and will not have the blood of you or that girl on his hands."_

Leigh made a sweep of Alrik's corpse. She kept one eye on the very still body of her friend and another on the other passageway. She found a letter the explained everything. Anders had been right, at least partially. Alrik was behind the Tranquil Solution, but it was his brain child and his alone. The part of her that felt a little sorry she killed him quickly died. This man was a monster there was no getting around it. A low groan from Anders made her return to his side. He sat up slowly with her help and looked around the cavern. The bodies of the Templars were strewn every were, but to his surprise he saw very little blood. A look of shock and dismay came to his face as he remembered what he had done. He tried to stand up only to fall back to his knees. All his strength was sapped from his muscles. He felt like he had been hit by a Templar's mana drain.

"Don't try to stand yet. You are injured. Here drink this it will help." Leigh handed him a elfroot potion to drink. His hands shook so badly that she had to help him. His wounds started to close and the strength returned to his body.

"Maker, Leigh...I almost...what have I done?"

"You tried to protect the mage. All but one of these Templars are alive. I killed Alrik not you so please don't beat yourself up." He looked at her like she was mad. Had she not noticed Justice tried to attack her or the girl? How could she be so forgiving?

"I almost killed that girl...and you! I need to get out of here. You have to stay away from me before I get you killed." He jumped to his feet and ran from her before she could stop him. His heart raced as he ran. Leigh's voice followed him, but he had to get away from her. Anders knew he could not trust himself around her anymore. He loved her too much to lose her.

All Leigh could do was watch him run away from her. Her heart broke to see him like this. "_Maker, this is a mess. When they wake up they will remember what happened and hunt me down. Shit! Shit! Shit!" "Where is your faith Hawke? Do you not remember one of my many talents is to make people forget?" "I remember, but how will they forget when Alrik is lying there dead?" "I will give them a different memory. Mortal minds are fragile things and subject to gentle urging. I will make them think they were attacked by lyrium smugglers and you came in to save them, but you were too late to save their leader." "Pash you are amazing, you know that right?" "I promised to protect you and I will stand by that vow. You are important Leigh, never forget that." "I am not sure I am that important Pash. I just can't stand to see good people kept oppressed and treated worse than livestock." "He is lucky to have you even if he can not bring himself to see it."_ Leigh let out a sigh and watched the red tendrils of magic touch the unconscious Templars. She knew she had to leave soon before they came to. Then she had to find the young mage if she could and help her escape Kirkwall before the Templars found her. Lastly she had to find Anders and try to talk to him. The red glow faded and she went to leave, a shadow passed in front of one of the torches catching her attention. The string of curses that left her mouth would have made Isabela blush. The shadow stopped dead and held up it's hands.

"You always did know how to curse, Leigh."

"Cullen?" Leigh stood her ground as he headed for her. She was in no mood to fight anyone else tonight, least of all him. "What brings you down here so late at night?" Her voice dripped sarcasm, but lacked her normal snarky flare.

"I found I have a group of missing Templars and one missing mage so I came looking for them. And here I find them dead and you standing over them covered in blood. Now what am I suppose to think about this Leigh?"

"They are alive Cullen, well all but their leader. I was exploring these tunnels seeing if there was anything valuable that I could sell and I stumbled upon them. I was able to chase off the lyrium smugglers that did this, but I was too late to save him. The blood is from fighting, it is not theirs. See for yourself." Cullen went over to one of the Templars and found him still breathing with only a few bruises here and there. "As for your mage I did not see them."

"I apologize then and offer my thanks for you aide to my men."

"Your welcome. I will take my leave then if you have it from here." He closed the distance between them much faster than she thought he could move in his heavy armor.

"Please wait, we have to talk." Leigh waited for him to continue making no effort to try to leave. She had had enough of running from him and the way he made her feel. "I know you hate me, but I never meant to hurt you. Not in Lothering or here in Kirkwall. I never wanted it to be this way." The way he looked at at her brought back memories of warm summer nights sitting on the roof of the Chantry. They use to just lay in each others arms watching the sun go to sleep and the stars come out to play. The hate she had for him melted away. She had a sneaking suspicion Pash had something to do with easing her rage. She would have to thank her later.

"I...I don't hate you Cullen. I said those words out of anger. I was young and still reeling from my father's death when I told you I wished you just die. I regretted the words as soon as they left my mouth. I loved you and I was hurt by what transpired. With what happened three years ago, well I am glad it was you and not some one like Ser Alrik that found Bethany. At least with you I know you would never hurt her. As for what happened a few weeks ago, I trust him."

"You love him, don't you?" She heard the hurt in his voice, again a old feeling squirmed in her gut. Even after everything Cullen still had a place in her heart and always would. He was her lover, but before that he was her friend and confidant, just like Anders was now. It was not lost to her the similarities of these two men whom she had come to care deeply for. Both were forced into a life they did not want, both were passionate about what they believed and both cared for her well being.

"I care for him, yes, as I cared for you. He is not the monster you claim him to be. I have lived around magic all my life Cullen. It is dangerous in the wrong hands, but in the right hands like my father's it is a blessing."

"He is a very lucky man to have you on his side. You have nothing to fear from me. I can not bare to take anything else from you. I know you will never feel for me what you did before, but I don't want to be your enemy. Is there anyway we can at least be friends?" She did something he was not expecting and took both of his hands in hers.

"I would like that. Hatred takes too much energy and poisons the soul. I don't want to live like that." The smile that broke out on her face was the first real one he had seen from her in over seven years. He had missed that smile the most out of everything he left behind in Lothering all those years ago. "I have to get back to my home before my mother sends the guard to come find me. I know the Knight Commander has forbidden that I be able to see Bethany, but if I give you letters from me to her could you deliver them for me. I miss her."

"I can do that for you. I might even be able to let you see her, but I will have to work out how. I know you did not get to say goodbye and I regret that more than you will even know."

"Thank you, I really mean it Cullen. I am glad to call you friend again. I have missed you." Leigh hugged him tightly before leaving the cavern. He watched her go back into the tunnels and vanish into the shadows. He shook his head then returned to his downed men. "_If I did not know better I would swear she could work magic with the way she can just vanish without a trace. Maker, please watch over her with Anders. She has no idea what he is capable of, but I will not hurt her again. Never again."_


	6. Chapter 6

After finding the young mage and helping her get to her family, Leigh made her way to the clinic. She had to see Anders. The look on his face when he ran from her back in the cavern disturbed her. It was look she normally saw on people who were at the end of their ropes, right before they hung themselves. She saw that look more often than not since coming to Kirkwall. It made her miss Lothering even more. Life was not perfect there by any means, but it was a lot less desperate. She stopped on the stairs near the clinic and took a few deep breaths. She had no idea what she would find when she opened that door and it scared her. With shaky hands she pushed the door open. The sight that greeted her worried her. Anders was rummaging through his things, discarding what he did not want on the floor. The clinic looked liked a dust devil tore through it, glass bottles, papers and cots were strewn everywhere. He had not heard her come in the room or if he did he did not acknowledge her presence. Leigh was torn between wanting to hold him or shake sense into him.

"Anders, please talk to me." He kept working on finding whatever it was he was looking for. Leigh was at the end of her patience, she grabbed his shoulders and spun him around to face her. "Look at me dammit!" His eyes glassed over and he slowly pushed away from her.

"You should not be here. I...I could have killed you. I am a monster Leigh. Everything has gone wrong, this is not how it was to be. I thought I was helping a friend and in turn he would help me, but I sullied him with my anger. I can't keep pretending that I am a good man anymore." Leigh took his face in her hands forcing him to look her in the eyes. He saw pain and sorrow, not revulsion which she should have. "How can you stand here and look at me like that. I tried to kill you!" His voice sounded like it did the first time she met him. A mix of him and Justice she never realized it before today.

"No Justice tried to kill me or should I say Vengeance did, you did not."

"We are the one and the same now so yes I did try to kill you, and this is not the first time it has happened. I will not let you put yourself in danger anymore. You need to stay away from me." He pushed her back gently and tried to get away from her, but Leigh was not dissuaded by his argument she pressed the issue.

"I told you I am not afraid. What more do I have to do to prove to you I will not give up on you? Do I have to sign it in blood, sell my soul, please Anders tell me what it will take to prove to you that your worth it?"

"Maker's breath you are a stubborn woman. Leigh, please listen to me. If you stay around me I will get you killed and that will kill me sure as any Templar would. I care too much about you to see you hurt especially if it is by my hands. I am not worthy of your trust or your compassion." Her eyes narrowed at him and her body shook with anger.

"I wish you could see yourself as I see you Anders. Maybe you would see you are worth my compassion and trust. I have felt like I have been beating my head against a wall with you these past three years, but I felt it was worth it. Your my friend, the one I feel closest to. I find myself falling for you and you keep me at arm's length. Now both my head and my heart are bleeding and I am at a lose for why."

"Better they metaphorically bleed than actually. I told you before I was not good for you and I care for you enough to not let you be dragged down with me. You deserve better."

"Who are you to tell me what I deserve? I have given up so much for others and the one thing I have ever wanted for myself I am being told I can't have!" Her world felt like it was crashing down around her and her heart felt like Fenris had just ripped it out of her chest. The tears she had been holding back burst forth and her body quivered with anger. "I wish I had died in Lothering it would have been kinder than feeling this."

"Never say that. This world would be a darker place without you."

"If I am such a bright light then why do I feel like a failure? I failed to help my father and ended up killing him. I failed to protect my siblings, Carver is dead because of me. Bethany is gone to the damned Circle because I wasn't here to protect her. How can I be this great person that everyone thinks I am when I can't even protect what I hold dear?"

"What do you mean you killed your father? I don't understand Leigh."

"The Templars found us one day. We had gone to Redcliffe for supplies just him and I. He heard someone needed his help so he went and I waited for him. When he was gone for hours I went to look for him. I found him surrounded by Templars, they drained his mana leaving him helpless. I screamed and flew at them, but I wasn't strong enough to stop them. They stabbed my father in the stomach and left him to die. I couldn't help him, I was no mage, no healer. I gave him a few potions and let him rest." Her eyes turned dark and haunted. A look of shame was on her face, but she continued. "I left my father and went after them. When I found them most were sleeping. They just stabbed a man and left him to die in front of his daughter and they were sleeping as if nothing happened. I found the one who hurt him and I slit his throat, but not before one of the others heard me. I killed them all and I enjoyed it. If I had not left my father's side I could have helped him stave off the infection that would later take his life, but I wanted revenge for what they had done. They took my father from us, but it was my fault because I wasn't strong enough to stop them.

"How old were you?"

"I had just turned seventeen."

"Maker, you were still a kid you can't blame yourself for that."

"Can't I? I failed him." Anders tried to console her, but she flinched away from him. "No, you have made yourself very clear that you do not want me around you. Don't make this harder for me. I have...I have to go." She stormed toward the door only to pause for a moment. "I have your proof of the Tranquil Solution. It was his and his alone and now he is dead. The mages of Kirkwall are safe for now. Good bye Anders and Maker watch over you." She ran from the clinic, taking the passage near the there to her estate. Her mother heard her footsteps and came to greet her. Leigh ran right by her mother and went to her room she slammed the door before collapsing against it sobbing uncontrollably. Her heart shattered and not even the sympathetic words from her spirit guardian could take away the pain.

It had been weeks since Anders had seen Leigh or any of their friends save Varric, who visited at least once every few days. He had wanted to go see her after their fight so many times, but knew it was too late. She most likely moved on to Fenris or even Sebastian, both of them had vied for her attention and could give her what he could not. He spent his days writing when he had no patients to heal. Normally he liked the solitude, but he missed her. Raven or should he say Ahslyn was right he really could be a selfish bastard at times. Just the thought of The Hero of Ferelden made his mood even more sour than it had been. Anders rubbed the bridge of his nose and tried to use some of his magic to stop the dull headache that was threatening to put a stop to his work on his manifesto. He finally gave up and went to lay down in his cot. His thoughts wandered back to his time with the Wardens. It wasn't long til he was fast asleep.

"_Anders behind you!" Raven's voice made him turn his head and see a ogre running at him full bore. The spell he flung at the creature just bounced off of it armor and it kept coming. He knew there was nothing he could do against this armored giant, he was going to die down here in the Deep Roads. A flash of black flew past him, daggers bared. The small framed woman threw herself at the ogre digging her weapons into it's gray skin. The ogre roared in pain and fell backwards. With one quick movement the rogue stabbed the creature through both eyes before it could rip her off of it's chest. The ground shook under Anders' feet as it hit. "Come on the others need help." He was not given time to process what had just happened, they had to press on._

"_Raven, they have us closed in there is no way around them. I counted over four dozen and at least three more ogres. We are not going to survive this." Nathaniel growled in frustration. He was not ready for this to be the end, none of them were._

"_We have to bottle neck them somewhere then you, Anders and Velanna can pick them off. Oghren, Sigrun, Justice and I will keep them off of you. I fought the bloody Archdemon, I will not die at the hands of these creatures and neither will any of you." She put her hand on Nathaniel's arm and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "We can do this Nate, I know we can." She turned to her friends and gave them all a speech Anders will never forget. "I chose all of you for your courage and skill. Wardens do what must be done so that others can live as they are meant to. We sacrifice so our families might never know the horror that we face everyday." She rubbed her face with her cloak to reveal her unpainted face to all of them for the first time. Anders heard Nathaniel gasp and he wondered why. She was a beautiful woman with pale skin, dark blue eyes and dark red hair. "I could have stayed at the Palace in Denerim, but my place is fighting by your side. If I die I know my husband will still be alive to rule our kingdom. I do not fear death as much as I fear these bastards destroying all I hold dear. We can not give up without a fight."_

"_Ashlyn Cousland! Maker's breath!"_

"_Wait Ashlyn Cousland, you don't mean Queen Ashlyn do you?" Anders' mouth fell open almost comically as he looked between his two rogue friends. _

"_Yes Anders, she is our Queen." Nathaniel looked at the ground so as not to make eye contact with the woman whose family his father murdered. _

"_What is the name of the Maker are you doing fighting darkspawn?" The others were just as dumbfounded as Anders was. "Your a Queen for Maker's sake, what is this some kind of challenge because court got boring?" The commander rolled her eyes and sighed. Her fingers went to the bridge of her nose as she thought what next to say._

"_I told you I would rather fight than watch them destroy everything. I had no choice in becoming a Warden, but I do not regret it. Ferelden needs it's King more than it needs it's Queen. The entire world thinks I am dead. I was only known as Raven to them, the Hero Of Ferelden. I knew if they found out I lived through something I should not have they would have taken me away. I couldn't allow that, not when I am needed here. I trust all of you with my life. Yes, even you Nate. Your father's sins are not yours. I want to see a day when the Couslands and the Howes are friends again. We all have things we are fighting for, whether it is for your clan or your country. We can do this, let's show them why Grey Wardens should be feared."_

"_I stand with you Warden. This corruption can not be allowed to go on."_

"_Thank you Justice. Your sword is always welcome." The rest of the Wardens chimed in and the battle was joined. They fought for what seemed like days. All of them tired and bloody by the time it was over, but very much alive. Anders wandered away from the group to think. He was exhausted, but Raven's or more properly Ashlyn's words rang in his ears still. She fought for love and to protect her kingdom. The others fought for things that meant something to them, but what did he fight for? All his life he had looked out for himself. He had friends in the Circle, but they were there and he was here. He never cared about anything except being free. Had his life been so empty that nothing mattered to him. "Are you alright Anders?" Ashlyn stood behind him still covered in blood and nursing a broken arm. She told him to save his strength for the others. He could heal her later after he rested._

"_I am fine Rav...Your Majesty." She let out a friendly chuckle and sat beside him in the rock._

"_You may call my Ashlyn or Ash. We have spilled blood together, you don't have to be formal." For all her ferocity on the battle field she was very soft spoken when it came to talking to them. This woman, this queen did not fit the stereotype of a noble. He had always believed they could care less about the common folk, especially mages. No one cared for the plight of mages, but here she was treating him like a equal. It had him at a loss. _

"_May I ask you something then Ash?"_

"_Anything."_

"_I know you gave us that rallying speech, but what are you really fighting out here with us for? You could be at the palace eating roast quail and screaming at your elven servants. I don't get it."_

"_I would never scream at our servants elf or otherwise. I have a dear friend I call sister who is a Dalish elf. I am here because my husband needs to be where he is. If the Orlesian Wardens had not all been killed I...I still would have come."_

"_But why risk your life?" He could not comprehend her reasoning._

"_It is who I am. I can't stand by and not help if I can. You did the same when I first met you. I told you to run, but you stayed and helped get people to safety. I conscripted you to save you from that bitch of a Templar because I saw the bodies of those she claimed you killed. They died by swords not magic, but I doubt she would have listened. I stood beside you when she tried for a second time to take you away because you are my friend and a good man Anders. You have compassion in your heart, you just have to stop hiding it behind sarcasm. You are not that hard to read. Do you remember what happened at the Circle with Uldrid?"_

"_I still have nightmares from it. Wait, you were the Warden that stopped him and saved us. You had Wynne with you and two others."_

"_Yes, I remember seeing you there too. You worked tirelessly to heal those injured by even the Templars. I saw the good magic can do. I know there is a darker side to it too, but most of the mages I have ever met have been good like you."_

"_You have more faith in me than I do in myself." Her good hand gently rested on his shoulder and her expression was one of kindness._

"_What do you want out of life Anders? What are you striving for?" He thought for a moment on what he did want. No one has ever asked him that before. It was always order after order in the Circle. He had not been allowed to dream of life any other way. He had had the thing he wanted over four years ago in the shape of a fellow apostate. His Dove had saved his life just like Ashlyn had, but also made him believe in true love for the first time in his life. The thought of her made his heart ache knowing she was in the south when the horde stormed through. He prayed she was alive, but deep down he knew not much survived down there. _

"_All I want is a pretty girl, a descent meal and the right to shoot lightning at fools without being pounced on by a Templar." He waited for her to tell him to dream on, but her answer surprised him._

"_Then strive for that. Find that pretty girl who can cook and fight to see mages free so you can shoot lightning at fools and not get in trouble. Alistair and I are trying to change things for mages as well as the rest of Ferelden, but change is a slow process. With the country still healing from the Blight and Loghain's treachery we have a long way to go. Become a advocate for mages. Show the world how wonderful they can be. You have a kind soul Anders don't waste it being bitter, do something to change it. You have a friend in me and I am always here to help." She wrapped her arm around his shoulder and shook him in a friendly manner. He smiled at Ashlyn for lighting the spark in him. For making him believe he could change the world into a place safe for mages._

"_My Lady your husband is a lucky man."_

"_Yes I know and so does he. I miss him so much, but having you all around me makes it easier. We are lucky to have good friends."_

"_When we get back to Vigil's Keep I will drink to that." They both laughed and went back to join the others by the campfire. _

Anders awoke to a loud thumping noise at his door. He rolled out of his cot and grabbed his staff. If the Templars wanted him they would have to fight him.

"Anders, are you there...please you have to be there, oh this is bad. Anders, please it's Merrill." He ran ripping open the door before grabbing the elf's arm and pulling her in.

"Merrill? What in the name of the Maker are you doing here, alone?" He looked her over and she reminded him of a scared rabbit.

"It's Hawke, she has been hurt badly in Lowtown. You have to come and help." His eyes went wide, then he put a vice grip on her upper arms. His voice came out in a growl.

"Go and grab whatever potions I have in my back room and hurry." Merrill did as she was told then led him to where Leigh was. He was not prepared for the scene in front of him. Sebastian sat behind her holding her against him as blood dripped out of her mouth. She had at least half a dozen arrows in her torso. One was very close to her heart. He moved on instinct trying not to think about who he was healing. Her eyes opened and she smiled at him.

"Just cou...couldn't stay away...could you?" More blood ran from her mouth and she bit back a scream as he pulled one of the arrows out. Her blood covered his hands as his magic poured into the wound. He started with the worst one first and worked his way down. The pool of blood around her was alarming, as was how pale she was. Her skin was ice cold to the touch. Anders had to be quicker than her blood lose or Leigh would not survive. "_Help me! I am losing her!" _His answer came with a boost of power from Justice. One by one her wounds were closed, but she need to rest and so did he. He used all his mana and then some to save her. Leigh opened her eyes slowly and saw Anders fall over from exhaustion next to her. She weakly reached out her hand and brushed a lock of hair from his in front of his eyes. He was panting and shaking, but he gave her a lop sided grin before passing out. "Please Fenris help Sebastian carry Anders back to my home. Aveline and Merrill can help me." Leigh passed out before she got his answer.

Leigh opened her eyes and tried to bolt out of her bed, but firm hands gently pushed her back down. She rubbed her eyes to make sure they were working right for the person who was sitting next to her she never thought she would see again. He tsked her when she tried to sit up again this time she eased herself back down to her pillow. Her chest ached making her remember what had happened to her and why he was here. Once she was healed he would be gone. She let out a whimper when she shifted herself.

"Are you in pain?" Anders leaned over her checking her bandages.

"No, I'm fine. Not that I am ungrateful, but what are you doing here? I thought you did not want me to be around me."

"Did I say that?" She glared at him and he held his hands up in surrender. "Alright I did say that. I'm an idiot Leigh, always have been. I have spent most of my life looking out for just myself. It scares me to care about someone else, to have them rely on me. Then there is Justice who one more than one occasion has tried to hurt you. I would never be able to forgive myself if I let that part of me hurt you."

"You care about me?"

"Of course I do. How can I make this right? How can I get you to forgive me for being a total and complete ass?" Leigh closed her eyes trying to fight the urge to laugh and cry. A small sweet smile played on her lips.

"For starters I would like..." Her cheeks turned dark crimson and everything inside of her wanted to disappear through the floor. "a kiss." The last word come out softer than a whisper. She looked up at him waiting for him to tell her no, but he just stared at her. Before she could say anything else his lips were on hers. His kisses were soft, but made her head spin or that could be from the blood loss. She wrapped her arms around his neck ignoring the twinge of pain her ribs gave her. The sound of someone clearing their throat made them break apart. Leandra stood in the doorway with a tray of food.

"I am glad to see you are both feeling better. I have lunch if your hungry." Anders stood up and let Leandra place the tray on her daughter's lap. "Anders may I have a word?" He nodded and started following Leigh's mother out of the room.

"Eat up I will be right back." Once outside of the door he braced himself for the dress down that was surely coming. He decided to head it off for as long as he could. "She is doing much better, she will be back to saving Kirkwall in a week or two."

"She is very lucky to have friends like all of you. Though I am surprised that you were dragged back into the mix. She told me you were leaving Kirkwall because of the Templars coming after you."

"I was in the process of leaving, but I found I couldn't. There are so many people here who need me, I could not abandon them." As much as the lie shocked him, he was not going to tell Leigh's mother otherwise.

"She was right, you are just like my Malcolm. He was a healer also. Leigh use to watch him help people then come home and tell me that is what she wanted to be when she grew up, a healer. She was not swayed from it even though she was not born a mage. When Bethany started to show her powers Leigh was a little jealous, but she always took care of her sister. Bethany could no longer go to the sermons at the Chantry, but Leigh found a way for her to enjoy them without fear of the Templars. They would climb on the roof of the building and listen. Her compassion for others knows no bounds."

"We are all very lucky to have her as a friend my dear lady."

"She loves you, I hope you know that. The night she came home and told me you were leaving she cried for hours. Her eyes did not have the same shine they normally have. I think it broke her heart to see you go." A look of pain crossed his face. He had hurt her and he hated himself for it.

"She has nothing to fear I am staying. After what just happened she needs my healing skills. For as many people that love her, there are twice as many that want to hurt her. I wasn't there for her and she almost..."

"You got there in time young man do not think about the alternative now. She is here, alive because of you. Now go enjoy lunch with her. I am going out with Merrill to get food for dinner. I invited everyone to join us tonight. I am not as good of a cook as Leigh, but with Orana's help I should do fine." He went back into Leigh's room to find her standing up and fully dressed in her finery. She turned her body to watch him walk in and almost screamed from the pain her wounds caused her. Anders ran to her his hands glowed with healing magic to ease her pain.

"You should not be out of bed yet. You could reopen your wounds. I was only able to heal them so far the rest has to be due to taking it easy, giving you body a chance to rest." He helped her back to the bed much to her protest. She gave him the look of an annoyed child, but obeyed. "Why did you tell your mother I was leaving Kirkwall?"

"It was better than telling her we had a fight. She would have marched herself right down to the clinic and dragged you back here by your ear. I shouldn't have lied to her, but I did not want her to try to fix things when you don't want to be around me."

"She really would have dragged me back here by the ear?" Leigh giggled at his mock horror as he held his ears. "I do want to be around you. I have always wanted to be around you."

"Then why push me away?"

"I did that to save you from what I am. As much as I claim not to be, I am an abomination. I can't control it all the time and you have been on the receiving end of it more than once just for trying to stop me. I wish I had met you before I fused with Justice. I never would have done it if I knew I would have someone like you in my life."

"Why does Justice hate me so much?" Anders felt Justice squirm in his mind. "_I do not hate her." "Could have fooled both of us there my friend. You have tried to hurt her at least twice." "I helped you save her life a few days ago. I find her a distraction to our cause, but I do not hate her." "Then you tell her you don't hate her." "Then I will." "Wait, shit!"_ The blue cracks started to form on his skin and Leigh backed away from him. "Justice?"

"Yes. I do not hate you Hawke. I find you a distraction for Anders and our cause, but I do not think you worthy of hate." "_He will not hurt you, talk to him."_ The soft murmur in her head gave her courage to stand her ground against Justice.

"How am I a distraction to him?"

"He thinks of you often when he needs to be planning out how we can free the mages. You take him with you to traipse around Kirkwall, keeping him from our goal. His mind wanders to you more than often than not. Some of those thoughts are not proper and should not be thought of." Leigh's eyes widened and the blush began to crawl back up her neck. "_For the love of the Maker, Justice please don't tell her this. I am begging you." "You told me to talk to her so I am talking." "She does not need to know I fantasies about her like that, thank you very much. She is going to look at me like a lecher from now on."_

"I ask for his help because he is a healer, something no one else can do since we lost Bethany. If he would let me I would help him with his plans to free mages from the Chantry. I have always believed they should not be caged as they are. If they were allowed to be free while being trained maybe more of them would not turn to blood magic or demons. I want a world that Anders, Bethany and Merrill can walk down the street without worrying about being attacked for what they are. I know I am no mage, but I do understand more than you think. As for what ever he thinks of me or what he imagines, well just shut your eyes and cover your ears." The blue glow faded as Anders wrestled back control.

"I am sorry he caught me off guard. He didn't upset you did he?"

"No, he was on his best behavior. Though he told me you haven't been." He winced making her giggle.

"Tact is not one of his strong points. Again I apologize for all of it."

"No harm done. Here you better help me eat some of this so it doesn't go to waste." She handed him half a sandwich and he ate it down greedily. He had not eaten much while keeping his vigil over her. Leigh leaned her head against his shoulder. She still felt weak from her injuries, but her heart felt like it could soar. She had him with her again. The hole that had been in her heart the last few weeks was closing and she felt she could breath again.

"I am not going to push you away anymore. Once your healed we can talk about us if you want to. After dinner tonight I am going back to the clinic since you are out of the woods. I want you to stay in bed and rest for at least another two weeks. That is not a request you could set your recovery back if you try to move around too much. I will come and check on you when I can."

"I understand. I promise to behave myself, for you. If you need anything let Varric know and he will get you supplies since I am out of commission."

"I will, now you need to take a nap as do I. Healing is draining so no more running into arrows please."

"Believe me I don't want to know how that feels again." She stifled a yawn. He smiled and tucked her into her bed. "You can stay you know, the bed in the guest room is not as nice."

"I think your mother would skin me alive if she finds me in her daughter's bed even if nothing happened." Leigh's eyes pleaded with him to stay. "Alright turn off the puppy eyes I will stay, but you are resting or I will leave." He sat against the headboard and felt her shift herself to rest her head on his chest. The feel of her weigh on him felt wonderful. It did not take long for him to drift off. He loved her there was no denying it now. He wanted her in his life. It would be the one selfish thing he would now allow himself. Having her would keep at least a small part of him human. That part would always be hers as long as he lived.


	7. Chapter 7

Leigh was feeling almost back to normal since going after those mercenaries that stole the Qunari poison. She looked at herself in the mirror and saw that her wounds were gone. She did as she promised and rested for two weeks. Now she was starting to get stir crazy from all the sitting and sleeping she had done. She made her way down her to her desk to see a huge pile of letters and notes for help. She let out a heavy sigh and started to read them all, seeing which ones needed her immediate attention. A knock on her front door brought Bodahn from the study where he was dusting. A young elf girl stood there looking frightened, her eyes darted back and forth as he led her into the main room.

"Serah, another message for you. Go on she is quite kind you have nothing to fear." Leigh stood up and greeted the girl with a warm smile. The elf's stance eased a bit as she handed Leigh the letter. Upon opening the letter and reading it a look of worry began to show. She opened her desk drawer and gathered some coin for the young messenger.

"Please tell Arianni I will be there shortly and this is for you and your family. I thank you for bringing me this." The elf nodded and clutched the coin to her chest. Leigh knew that she probably had never seen that much coin in her entire life time. Once the messenger is gone she ran up the stairs and changed into her armor. The letter had her more than worried. Feynriel had gone to sleep and not awakened. The letter said Marethari was on her way to help, but Arianni thought she might be able to help too.

"Leigh where are you going?" Her mother stood in her doorway with a look of concern. "Are you sure you are ready to jump back into the fray?"

"I am fine Mama. I don't think this request requires me fighting anything. It is just a meeting in the Alienage with a person I helped a while ago she just wants to talk. I just don't want to be caught with my guard down so I am going ready for anything. Please don't worry so."

"I am your mother, it is my job to worry. You are all I have left Leigh, you will have to forgive me if I am protective."

"I know Mama. I will be careful. I have to go. See you later tonight." Leandra watched her daughter run down the stairs and out the front door of their estate. Every time Leigh left her mother wondered if it would be the last time she would see her eldest alive.

"Malcolm she is too much like you. Maker please watch over my little girl and bring her home safe to me."

With Fenris and Sebastian in tow she stopped at the Hanged Man to ask Varric to join them. The dwarf was happy to see Hawke up and about again. He joined them down in the main room of the bar once he made sure he had everything he need for this mission. Hawke had been very vague about what they would be doing so it was best to be prepared for anything.

"I am surprised Blondie isn't following you around like a lost Mabari. Where is he today?"

"This request is something I did not think he would be comfortable with so I did not ask him to come."

"What are you hunting mages and don't want to hurt his feelings?" Disdain dripped in Fenris' words making Leigh bristle a bit. She shot him a withering look and he shut his mouth. She liked Fenris, but his dislike for mages regardless of what he suffered under Danarius rubbed her the wrong way.

"No Fenris we are not hunting mages. Nor will I ever unless they are like Danarius."

"Then may I ask what we are doing? It looks like we are staying in Kirkwall and heading to the Alienage. Please tell me you are not dragging the three of us to see Merrill."

"No we are not going to visit Merrill, if that were to case I would have left your moody ass at home. There is something else I have to do and I wanted people I knew I could trust if it goes wrong."

"Hawke could you sound more ominous, what is going on?" Varric gave her a look of concern.

"I will fill you in once we are there. I need to find out everything before...it doesn't matter what ever it is I have to help." The three men all exchanged looks of question and concern. Their normally confident and sarcastic leader looked worried. Something they did not see very often and it in turn worried them. Arianni was pacing in front of her home, her face was drawn tight with worry. She looked up and saw Leigh heading toward her.

"Thank the Creators your here. The Keeper should be arriving shortly." The older woman hugged Leigh tightly and started sobbing on her shoulder.

"What happened to Feynriel?"

"He went into a dream and has no come out of it. It has been two days. The Keeper said he is battling in the Beyond, but the longer he stays in his dreams..."

"The less likely it will be that he will wake from it." The elf nodded and sobbed louder. "Did the Keeper tell you how we can save him?"

"She said someone must go in after him and stop the demons that have him trapped, but it has to be someone he trusts and he trusts you Hawke."

"Hawke you can't go into the Fade it's sacrilege." Sebastian crossed his arms across his chest. The look of fear on his face was clear.

"If that is the only way to save him then that is what I will do. I am not asking anyone else to go with me."

"You would go into the Fade alone? Are you mad?"

"Yes, Sebastian I am quite mad and surly, don't forget surly." He gave her a look of utter horror that made her sorry she said anything. Leigh liked Sebastian, it was just he was too wholesome for her. With his looks and his accent he could have any woman he wants, but his vows to the Chantry took that option away years ago. "I'm sorry, I am a little on edge I should not be joking about this. I understand your concern, but I can't just stand by and let this boy be taken by demons.

"This could end very badly Hawke for him and for you. I don't want to see you controlled by a demon either." His face softened as did his stance. Leigh took his hand trying to reassure him she knew what she was doing, even if she had no clue how she was going to save the boy.

"That is why I brought the three of you with me. Fenris if anything should happen I know you will do what must be done."

"Hawke I...I understand. I hope it does not come to that."

"I hope so too. Ah, it looks like the Keeper is here. I want you three to wait outside while I talk to her and Arianni. I will come out when I know what the plan is." She followed the two elven women into the small home and listened to what had to be done.

"He is what the Tevinter's call a Somniari. A dreamer."

"A dreamer?" Leigh had never known the real name of them, but she had heard of dreamers before. The cold pit that was starting in her stomach got worse.

"In the Beyond Fenyriel has great power, that is why the demons want him. A dreamer abomination would be nearly unstoppable." _"So I have heard before. Maker's mercy, this is not going to be easy." "You have nothing to fear Leigh, I will be there with you." "You don't know how happy I am to hear that." "You should have asked the healer to join you." "He...would have tried to stop me and Feynriel needs help. If I hadn't had you all these years this could be me." "You will never have to fear that anymore. Your will is too strong for them to take over unless you let them."_

"What do I have to do?"

"You must go into the Beyond and help him wake. He needs someone he can trust and he trusts you more than anyone else in his life right now. This will not be a easy task it carries a heavy price should you fail.

"I understand, let me talk to my friends and I will be right back to start the ritual. The sooner he is free the better." Leigh went out to talk to her friends after a heated argument with both Sebastian and Fenris she went back into Arianni's house to prepare.

"We need to get Blondie here now before she does something we all will regret." Even before Varric could finish his sentence Fenris took off toward Darktown. As much as he hated Anders, he knew the mage was to only one who could keep Hawke safe in the Fade. It did not take him long to reach his destination. The clinic door was closed, but it did not stop him, he threw the door open much to Anders surprise.

"Fenris? What in the name of the Maker are you doing here?" He leveled his staff prepared for a fight, but the look of pure fear on the elf's face made him ease if only a little.

"You have to come with me mage, Hawke has gotten herself into more trouble than any of us think she can handle. She plans to enter the Fade and help out that half breed mage she saved three years ago. I don't know much about the Fade, but what I do know is she does not belong there."

"She can't be that foolish?" The look on Fenris' face told him otherwise. "Who is going with her?"

"No one. She told us she could not in good continence ask any of us to go with her. She...she asked me if things went wrong to end her." Anders blood ran cold. "I do not want to hurt her mage. You have to help her."

"Where is she?" Fenris led the way back to Lowtown, it was all Anders could do to keep up with the lithe elf. His mind reeled and fear clutched at his heart. He avoided the Fade like the plague since fusing with Justice, but for her he would storm the Black City with out regret. He prayed they were not too late. "_Leigh what have you gotten yourself into this time. I swear she is going to be the death of me." I told you she was a distraction." "Not now Justice, I need your help not your nagging. The Fade is your territory. I need to know I can trust you to protect her." "You have my word Anders. I will see no harm come to her." "Thank you my friend."_

Leigh drank down the sleep potion Marethari had given her and felt her limbs go numb almost immediately. She was glad that they had made her lay down or she would have fallen flat on her face. A heavy feeling came over her eyes and she let herself drift off to sleep. She was gone from the waking world when the door flew open as Anders and Fenris stormed in.

"You are sending me as well Keeper. Hawke is no mage and does not fully grasp what could happen to her in the Fade."

"I have another bottle of the sleeping potion. You should lay down before you take it." Anders took one last look at Leigh before drinking down the potion. Her face was placid and her chest was rising and falling evenly. "We have not started the ritual yet, she merely sleeps." He nodded and tipped the vial back, the sudden lurch of the ritual starting made his stomach turn. Justice pushed forward as they entered the Fade. Anders conscientiousness slipped into a deep slumber.

"Well this was a wonderful idea I had. Maker, I hate the Fade." A soft chuckle came from behind Leigh making her turn around. The figure that stood before her was a sight to be seen. A silvery apparition stood a few feet away from her. Long hair went right down the spirit's back and her eyes had a warm red glow to them. She held a flaming long sword in her hand, but wore robes instead of armor. She gave Leigh a warm smile before placing her hand on the rogue's shoulder.

"You have nothing to fear in the Fade anymore. Demons can not stand against you here."

"I know Pash, but it still makes me uneasy."

"We need to hurry the boy will not last much longer."

"Wait I feel something else here, what is that?" Leigh spun around and let out a squeal. Pash hid behind one of the stone pillars ready to attack. "Anders? What are you doing here?"

"I am Justice and he asked me to protect you. Who were you talking to a moment ago?" Eerie glowing eyes moved around the room searching for owner of the other voice.

"Pash you can come out. It's Justice." The spirit stepped out and Leigh could have sworn she saw a look of pain cross over Justice's face.

"As you can see she has a guardian here brother. We must hurry before we lose the boy." Justice opened his mouth to speak, but Pash cut him off "I promise we can converse afterward, now is not the time." Justice nodded once, not take his eyes off of Pash. The three went deeper into Feynriel's dream The sloth demon was easily dispatched as was the desire demon. The last demon proved to be a challenge. Pride demons were the strongest of all the demons in the Fade.

"What have we here? Another dreamer come for me to make a meal of. I thought the boy was strong, but you are stronger." A feral growl hissed through Leigh's teeth. Both Pash and Justice stood in front of her blocking the demon from his prey. "These spirits are no match for me mortal. It would be easier if you just gave in. I can give you power beyond your greatest expectation."

"No thanks, I pass. I like the way I am, but if you would just die already that would be great." A dark laugh from the demon sent a chill right down her spine.

"I was not giving you a choice mortal. You will be mine." The demon reached for Leigh only to have Pash thrust her sword at him. He wheeled back then charged at the spirit. A large clawed hand raked across Pash's back making her scream in pain. Justice jumped into the fray using what ever spells he could to slow the demon down. Leigh ran to her fallen guardian's side.

"Pash? Holy Maker, I didn't think spirits could bleed." Long gashes dripped a golden liquid from the spirit's side. They did not look very deep, but Leigh knew they had to be painful none the less.

"Only when fighting our brethren. Demons use to be spirits before they were corrupted by their jealousy of mortals. Leigh you must end this. You have power here. Justice will not hold out much longer, you must believe in yourself. Use the gift the Maker has given you." Leigh stood up and ran toward the struggling Justice and the demon of pride. Justice was using every spell he had to defeat his foe. The demon just laughed and shrugged them off.

"Give up, you can not defeat me. I can see right through you brother and you are not better than I am. You are warped by the human you inhabit. You are a demon, why protect this mortal?"

"I am not a demon! I am Justice, nothing you say will make me believe otherwise." The demon wrapped it's large clawed hand around Justice picking him up off the ground. Leigh heard Justice scream in pain as the life was being squeezed out of him. She took a deep breath calling her powers to the surface. Flames wreathed her hands catching the demon's attention.

"Let him go or so help me I will make you pay!" The demon just growled before he threw Justice aside like a limp rag doll. Leigh watched in horror as his body landed and stayed still, too still. She let out a scream of rage. "Come and get me if you dare bastard."

"I will enjoy taking your powers mortal. I told you they could not protect you from me. When I am done with you I will feast on the boy as well." Leigh flung both her hands out in front of her. Balls of flame hit the demon full force and he staggered back. He tried to beat out the flames with is hands, but it began to spread across his flesh. Howl of pain and rage came from the demon as the flames licked greedily up his body. He charged at Leigh, but she was ready for him. She waved her hands again and the ground beneath his feet shook as vines caught his legs. She jumped out of the way as he landed face first in front of her. "How...how can you do this?"

"I will not let you hurt Feynriel or my other friends. You will die demon and it will not be pleasant." Leigh made a fist and the vines tightened their grip on the demon. He let out another howl, but she was not about to let up. "How do you like feeling your own medicine?" She drew her hands up over her head calling a storm of fire down from the sky. The demon's dying pleas were washed out by the roar of the flames. All that was left of the demon was embers and ash. "Pash are you alright?"

"I am fine. We need to check on Justice. Both of them ran to the fallen form who had still not moved. Pash ran her hands over his broken body sending red waves of magic through him.

"What would happen if he died here?"

"He would return to the waking world none the worse for wear, save a bad headache. I think that is what you call it. He was never in any real danger. The demon can not take over a body that has already taken a spirit into it."

"And you could he have killed you?"

"Perhaps, but I doubt it. You did well. Your powers have grown here even without practice." Leigh still looked worried as she stared at Anders' face. "The mortal who owns this body is sleeping he did not see what you did here. When Justice wakes we will have to convince him to keep your secret. Your world is not ready for the power you can wield yet. There are too many people who would want to use you or worse end your life. This is the reason why your father asked for my help. This is the reason why you are bound."

"I remember. I have no desire to be hunted anymore than I have been. Between the Templars dogging my friends and then all the other people I have pissed off I am tired of running." Pash gave her a solemn smile and went back to rousting Justice. It did not take long til he was sitting up on his own. He looked behind him to see the still smoldering embers that were once the pride demon. Justice jumped to his feet bring himself to his full height to tower over Leigh. His eyes stared balefully at Pash.

"Peace brother, the danger has passed for now."

"Were you the one who stopped the demon?"

"No, it was Hawke. She was born a mage, but because she is like the boy Feynriel her powers had to be bound to keep her from becoming a danger."

"Hawke is no mage. I have seen her fight in the mortal world and she has never shown use of magic."

"I said her powers where bound, so no she would not be able to use her magic in the waking world. None the less she is a mage. Since she could not use her powers she had to learn other skills."

"How is she bound? To keep a mage from their powers is to be made Tranquil. She is no Tranquil." Pash have a short peel of laughter. "This in no laughing matter sister. I need to understand this to see if she is a danger to us."

"You mean to you and your host. Hawke is no danger to anyone save those who try to hurt her friends. I agreed to help her father bind her powers as long as she keeps her amulet with her the powers she has will not manifest. If it is lost or broken then her powers will come back with a vengeance and I will be gone. My fate is tied to hers."

"Why would you do this?"

"Why would you join with the mortal you are merged with? I did it to save her from ones who would try to hurt her." Justice scoffed at Pash and she glared at him. "I am a spirit of Compassion. I care what happens to mortals."

"As do I. I believe mages should be free. They deserve justice." Leigh could only watch as the two spirits traded volleys back and forth. She sighed and went to look for Feynriel, she found him back near the main room pacing.

"Feynriel the demons are gone your safe."

"Maker, I need to get out of here. All I hear are people screaming trying to get away from the demons. I can't take this anymore, please Hawke you have to kill me. Please I can't live like this."

"You can master this. I know you can. If I kill you here you will become Tranquil out there. You will feel nothing if that happens."

"There is no one who can help me. The Dalish have tried, but even they do not understand. No one does."

"I understand." The boy stared at her disbelieving. Leigh stepped away from him and started waving her hands til the scene around them changed. Instead of the Gallows they stood in a field surrounded by woods. "I am just like you Feynriel. I was much younger when the demons started to whisper to me. I was not strong enough to stop them, but I had a guardian here in the Fade. I was lucky, but you are so much stronger than I will ever be. You have faced this alone and still they have not trapped you. You have to find a teacher that can help you and I fear you won't find it with the Dalish or in Kirkwall."

"You could teach me."

"I am still learning myself. I have avoided the Fade for a long time because of what I am."

"Maybe in Tevinter I can find a teacher."

"They would know more of how to help you. I had my father to help me when I was younger, but when he died I stopped coming here."

"Your father was a mage?"

"Yes and my sister also. It runs on both sides of my family. It was inevitable that at least one of us would be born with magic."

"You have been a greater friend than I thought I would ever find here is Kirkwall. I swear someday I will be able to hopefully return the favor. You give me hope that I can do this. I have to go and start my journey Hawke. Maker smile on you and please tell my mother I love her."

"I will, take care of yourself." He smiled at her and faded away as he woke from his dream. Leigh could hear the spirits still snipping at each other. "Maker they fight like a old married couple. I guess I should break up the lovers spat before they come to blows." Leigh had never seen Pash this outraged in a long time. Her normally angelic face was twisted in annoyance. "Aren't you two done yet? I would like to go back to the land of the living sometime soon if you please. I am sure I will be plenty chewed out when I wake so listening to you to fight like you have been married for years is not helping me."

"Did you speak with the boy?"

"Yes and he is going to learn from the Tevinter mages how to control his powers with any luck they can help him."

"I hope they can. I have convinced my brother to not tell anyone your secret for now. He has also agreed to not attack you anymore if he can help it. We will talk soon Hawke." The dream began to fade and the sounds of the real world broke through. When Leigh opened her eyes she saw five pairs of eyes staring at her warily. A groan from behind her told her Anders was waking up. She braced herself for the tirade she knew was coming from him. When she turned her head to look at him, his eyes confirmed it. She wished at that moment she had stayed in the Fade. She would have rather listened to Pash and Justice fight then hear disappointment or anger in his voice.


	8. Chapter 8

Leigh remained lying on the floor of Arianni's home. She felt disoriented from being in the Fade. Her limbs felt like lead and her stomach was threatening to revolt against her. She cursed herself for trying to sit up too quickly when she woke. Marethari placed her hands on the sides of Leigh's neck to try to ease the discomfort she was feeling. It subsided a little, but she dared not move. Leigh opened her eyes again and found Fenris kneeling next to her. His face was a mask of worry and annoyance. He looked her over like he was waiting for her to turn into an abomination. She tried to give him a reassuring smile, but even the muscles in her face protested any type of movement. She took her eyes of the elf and sought out her other companions. Sebastian was on the floor praying, at least that is what it looked like. Varric was pacing in front of Arianni's kitchen table muttering to himself. Lastly she laid eyes on Anders who was trying to get over his own bout of disorientation from coming back from the Fade. His face looked pale and sweaty. His body was shaking, but she could not tell if it was from the Fade or anger.

"Is she possessed?" She recognized the gravelly voice of Fenris. Leigh wanted to answer him, but another lurch in her stomach made her keep her lips shut.

"I do not know. This sickness could be cause by the fact she is not a mage. The Beyond is not a place to be tread lightly."

"Well what about him? Anders looks sick too, but not as bad as she does."

"The Fade is disorienting Fenris. I have avoided it for years. To go back and have to jump right into a fight makes it worse. Leigh has never been to the Fade so it will take her longer to get over feeling. If you give me a few more minutes I can test to see if she has any extra baggage." Anders voice sounded weary, but the side effects of the Fade were wearing off. He could at least stand. "Maker, I haven't felt this bad since I lost the drinking contest with Oghren."

"_Oh, if you only knew. Pash can you do anything to make this feeling go away?" "Not without drawing the attention of the Keeper or Anders. You will have to suffer through for now. It will pass. You haven't been in the Fade since your father died seven years ago. I am surprised you have what is the phrase, oh yes, kept down your lunch." "Please don't remind me I should just throw up and get it over with, but I am not doing that in front of these men." "I think they will understand." "I would rather not find out." _Her stomach lurched again and this time she knew there was no stopping it. With all the strength she had she scrabbled to her feet and ran for the door. She made it outside before spewing all the contents of her stomach on the ground in front of Arianni's home. Gentle hands rubbed her back as another wave of retching hit her.

"I would say this is what you get for worrying me, but I know you will only kick my ass later." Leigh wiped her mouth and tried to stand up to face Anders. Her legs felt like she had no bones in them. She stumbled into Anders nearly knocking them both over. "Slow movements Leigh. If you try to push through this it will only make it worse." She groaned and let him lead her back into the house.

"So mage is she possessed?"

"No, it is as the Keeper said she is suffering from being in the Fade. I want to get her back to the clinic and watch her just to make sure she is alright. Will one of you gentlemen be willing to carry her there?"

"I will." Sebastian stepped forward and mentally Leigh smacked herself.

"Great so I can throw up all over you nice white armor. I can walk on my own thank you very much. I will just need someone to keep me from falling over."

"It is better you don't. Don't be stubborn , that is what got you into this mess in the first place. Go ahead and pick her up." Anders nodded at Sebastian and Leigh could only grumble as she was lifted off the floor. She closed her eyes and tried not to think about the swaying motion of his walking. She started to hum to herself to keep her mind off of her stomach.

"What are you humming Hawke?" She opened her eyes and looked into Sebastian's impossibly blue eyes. She gave words to the melody she was humming and a smile spread over the Chantry brother's face. "I did not know you knew the Canticle of Benediction?"

"I use to be a good little Andrastian. Some things never leave you. My sister and I use to sing the Chant together when we were both children. Our favorite was "Here lies the abyss, the well of all souls. From these emerald waters doth life spring anew. Come to me, child, and I shall embrace you. In my arms lies Eternity." Leigh's expression turned sad

"Are you alright Hawke?"

"I'm fine just thinking about my father. Since he was an apostate we could not have the Reverend Mother preside over his funeral. I had to be the one to read the scripture."

"I am sorry Hawke." The look of pity in his eyes was genuine and she settled her head back onto his shoulder. Her nausea was passing and her limbs didn't feel quite so heavy. She wanted to tell them she could walk on her own power, but she held her tongue. She knew they were nearing Darktown when the smell hit her. She hated the fact that her countrymen were shoved down here like rats. If it wasn't for Anders a lot of them would have died years ago.

"Let me set up a cot for her and find some clean linens." Anders disappeared into one of the back rooms of the clinic and came back with a arm full of clean, but dingy looking sheets. Sebastian lowered her down after the cot was set up. She gave his hand a squeeze.

"Thank you Sebastian."

"Your quite welcome Hawke. I am glad you came back from the Fade safely. It is not a place mortals should tread. It is the realm of the Maker we have already poisoned it once with our sin."

"Well I guess then mages are his chosen because they can go to the Fade and stay awake." The royal archer gave her a confused look, but she caught sight of Anders over Sebastian's shoulder and he had a smirk on his face.

"I will take my leave of you now. Feel better and you know where I am if you need me." With Sebastian gone it left Leigh with Fenris, Varric and Anders to deal with.

"How ya feeling Hawke?"

"Like my head was trampled by a ogre, but otherwise not bad." Varric barked out a laugh and slapped his hand on her shoulder.

"That proves you aren't possessed. No one other than you would make that joke." He leaned in and whispered in her ear. "I am going to take Fenris home to give you two a chance to talk. You should have seen the look on Blondie's face when he came into that house."

"Thank you Varric," She sat up and gave Fenris an apologetic look. "thank you too Fenris."

"Your welcome and Hawke I am glad you are alright." She waited patiently for Anders to start yelling at her, when he remained quiet she began to worry he was so angry with her that he was giving her the silent treatment. She swung her legs over the cot and stared at his back. His shoulders were shaking a little. Leigh couldn't take the silence anymore and decided to break it.

"Anders? I know your mad, but I had to. I couldn't let that poor boy be taken over by demons."

"You should have come to me for help instead of trying to do it alone. Maker's breath Leigh, you have no idea what could have happened to you. We could have lost you."

"But you didn't, I am still here and as far as I know demon free." Anders frowned at her and she winced.

"This is no laughing matter dammit. Do you know what you put us through? Fenris was upset enough to come get me. That man hates me, but he was so scared of losing you he put that aside."

"I...your right. I just could not let Feynriel be destroyed by those bastards. He did not ask to be born with powers. It is not his fault, just like it isn't your fault, or Bethany's, or my father's. Instead of being helped he would have been feared for the powers he had in the Fade."

"Why?"

"The Keeper called him a Somniari..."

"A dreamer? No wonder the demons wanted him. Mages like him are rare. Most don't survive their minds are too fragile."

"So the Keeper told me. Now do you see why I had to do this?"

"No, but that boy is very lucky and so are you. Justice told me you handled yourself well. You did not listen to the demons' offers, but you still should not have done it."

"We will have to agree to disagree on that. I'm sorry I worried you and everyone else." His amber colored eyes turned soft as he cupped her face. She could feel a spark of magic in his touch. Her eyes half closed and she let out a sigh of relief. The pounding in her head was gone. "Maker, that feels so much better."

"I bet it does. Now I want you chew on these mint leaves to settle your stomach, then I want you to rest for a bit where I can watch you. You get in too much trouble left to your own devises."

"Yes father." She gave him a crooked smile which he returned. "At least my mother is not expecting me back til after sundown." She nibbled on the leaves and she found the juices did settle her stomach, they also made the bad taste in her mouth go away.

"I will wake you well before then I promise. I don't want you mother coming down here wagging her finger at me." Leigh gave a short laugh before letting her body ease back down on the cot. She felt safe having him watch over her while she slept.

After sleeping for a few hours Leigh woke up to find herself alone. Anders was at his desk when she drifted off to sleep, but now he was nowhere to be found. Her heart tripped a few beats as she fastened her daggers back to her side. She came around the privacy curtain and found him kneeling in front of what looked like a bowl.

"What are you doing?" Anders stood up dusting his knees off with a sheepish look on his face.

"It is silly, but I was putting out milk to see if I could entice a cat to come visit. I miss having one around, but I think the refugees have scared them off. Or maybe eaten them."

"Merrill told me there was a litter of kittens down near the merchants in Lowtown. Maybe you could take one of them."

"I wonder if there is an orange tabby." His eyes became thoughtful for a moment then he shook his head. "You know I have been meaning to thank you. You have stuck your neck out for the mages here and you didn't have to."

"They deserve to be free. It would kill me to see the Templars take you away. I grew up watching my father having to look over his shoulder all the time and it just got worse when Bethany's powers started to show. I see what it has done to you. Your tired all the time because I know you don't sleep soundly for fear they will come for you in the night."

"I wished more people believe like you do that we should be free." Leigh placed her hand on his arm and looked up into his eyes. The closeness of her made his heart start to race like a scared horse. She smelled like lilac and sandalwood. "You know you are driving me mad right?"

"What?"

"I have tried very hard to keep you at arms length. You deserve a normal life, not hunted and hated like you would be with me. I want better for you than what I can give you."

"I have never had a normal life. If I did finally get to have a normal life I would go crazy. It is my choice and I choose to love you Anders." His eyes went wide at her confession of love. He had never heard anyone other than his mother and his Dove tell him they loved him. None that he thought meant it anyway. Love was something taboo in the Circle.

"You love me?"

"Yes, I do. I do not go into this blindly. I know what a life on the run means and I don't care, what I do care about is you. It has been a long time since anyone has stirred up these kind of feelings in me. I was young when I was with Cullen and I look back now seeing that it was more a physical thing than emotional. With what I feel for you it is so much more than just wanting to take you to bed. I want a life with you."

"You know what I am, you have seen what I can do if cornered. I don't want you to wake up one day and regret being with me."

"Well we would have to start before that could happen." She gave him a seductive smile and the last ounce of his resolve was gone. Anders rushed at her planting fevered kisses on her lips. At first Leigh was stiff with surprise at his advances. All coherent thought was gone as desire took hold. They broke apart to breathe, he cupped her cheek and rested his forehead against hers.

"This will be a disaster, but I can't live without it. I can't live without you. If your door is open tonight I will come to you. If it is not I will know you finally heeded my warnings and let me go. You better go home for now before you mother comes looking for you."

"I will be waiting." Leigh kissed his cheek before walking out of the clinic. Her mind raced as she ran to get home. She felt like a love sick teenager, but she didn't care. The feelings she had for him were much more than just a simple roll in the hay. She realized she had nothing to wear other than her old linen shirt and a pair of patched trousers to sleep in. Not exactly the sexiest thing for a man to see a woman in. "Balls, where the hell do I buy a nightgown at this time of the day?" She could ask her mother, but then questions would be asked and she was not ready for that. Aveline did not look like the type that would know either. That left Isabela. Inside Leigh groaned she was not keen on talking about this, especially with Isabela. She changed her course and headed for Lowtown to find her fellow rogue. She hoped that Isabela would not pry too much, she did not want to have her euphoric mood killed by anything.

Anders went to the Blooming Rose to get himself cleaned up. It was the only place he knew of that would not ask questions about why he wanted to take a thorough bath. After the workers filled the tub with steaming water they left him alone. He eased himself into the tub and let out a content sigh. He had forgotten how good a hot bath felt. After scrubbing himself clean and drying off he looked at himself in the mirror. He had changed so much in the past four years. The man he had been was gone and the person in his place was someone he never thought he would be. He wondered what Ashlyn would say if she saw him like this or his other Warden friends. Anders continued to look at his reflection and let out a exasperated sigh.

"What the hell does she see in me?" "_I still do not understand why mortals act this way around the opposite sex." _"Act like what?" "_Like blithering fools." "_Thanks Justice, so now I am a blithering fool? Then why in the name of the Maker did you decide to join with me then?" Justice was silent for a moment, but when he answered Anders heard a hint of sorrow in his voice. It was something he had never heard from him before. "_If there was a way for me to give you back your life as it was before I would. I have found that I have become as much a prison for you as the Circle was. You have emotions running through you I have no names for and have never felt before, they are disquieting." _"I am sorry my friend. This is not how I saw this playing out when I offered to be host. It is my fault that you have been corrupted." "_I thought I was stronger than your anger, it is as much my fault. My companion in the Fade would have been a better at this than me. She had helped many mages through out time. I was a fool to think I could ever do what she did."_ "Your companion? You mean another fade spirit?" "_Yes, a spirit of Compassion. We normally travel alone in the Fade. Sometimes like spirits will travel together, but she stayed with me. Her constant desire to to help people use to confuse me. I use to think your kind was beneath us and not worth her time, but she never faltered. She was the reason you found me in the Fade helping the people the Baroness held hostage." _"Why didn't we see her there with you?" "_The despair of those who were trapped hurt her. If she lingered to long she would lose herself to that feeling, it could kill her. She found another charge who needed her more, but she bid me to stay and help. Once the Baroness was defeated I was to find her, but as you know I was trapped in your world." _"You love her, don't you?" "_I did not know what love is til I tasted Kristoff's memories and now yours. I was devoted to her, call it what you will." _Silence stretched out between them. Neither knowing what to tell the other. Justice was the first to break the quiet. "_Hawke is waiting for you. I will sleep to give you privacy. I still find her a distraction, but she proved herself in the Fade. She is a worthy companion." _"Thank you Justice, this is important to me. She is important. I love her." "_I know."_

Leigh tried not to fidget as Isabela was putting makeup on her. The pirate had been ribbing her for past hour about her coming rendezvous with their healer. Leigh took it in stride only because she needed Isabela's help. It had been a very long time since she had to primp herself for a night with a man. Deep down she was grateful for the help. Isabela knew exactly where to go to get a sexy, but not outlandish nightgown.

"Stop fidgeting Hawke. I am almost done."

"If you made me look like one of those girls from the Blooming Rose, so help me Isabela I will scream."

"Ye of little faith. I know how to make you look pleasing to a man. I will admit you don't need much to make you irresistible to anyone. Anders would be a total idiot not to be attracted to you, that or he likes men." Leigh opened her eyes and glared at the her Rivani friend. "Don't give me that look. He only has eyes for you. Believe me I have seen women try to catch his eye, but he wants you."

"Were you one of those women?"

"I have to admit yes I was. He shot me down faster than Varric shooting off Bianca at some thugs. I was a little put off til I saw him staring at you. I knew then he wanted you and I backed off."

"He really stares at me when I am not looking?" Isabela snorted a laugh at her friend.

"You call yourself a rogue? I swear you are oblivious. Now go look at yourself in the looking glass and tell me what you think." Leigh went to her mirror and gasped. She was wearing the gown and it hugged every curve on her body. The silver color of it matched her eyes and went well with her pale skin. Isabela gave her a little bit of color in her cheeks and a smoky look to her eyes. Her lips looked plump with the hint of mauve color. Leigh's hair framed her face in soft waves that cascaded down to her shoulder blades. She looked beautiful.

"Isabela, you do good work. Maker, I don't think I have ever looked like this. Thank you so much."

"Your very welcome. Now Hawke your not still a virgin are you?" Leigh let out a snort and rolled her eyes.

"I have been with a man before. So no worries about giving me the talk. I do appreciate it though."

"Good. Well I will leave you to enjoy your night. Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Isabela gave her a wink and left. Now there was nothing to do but wait til Anders arrived. She prayed he would show up soon. She felt like she was going to burst into flames if she waited too much longer. She busied herself with pacing in front of her fireplace, it was all she could do while she waited for the man she loves to show himself.


	9. Chapter 9

The waiting was killing her. It was well after most peoples bedtime and Anders still had not shown himself. Thoughts raced through Leigh's head. Did the Templars find him? Was he hurt or stuck healing someone at the clinic? Did he decide that it was better not to come? Her heart began to sink down to her toes as she paced in front of her fire place. Her room felt like the walls were closing in on her, so she went to stand out on the balcony overlooking the small courtyard of her estate. She had not had any time to clean it up since they had moved in here. It was overgrown with ivy and out of control rose bushes. She would have to remind herself to ask Merrill for help in turning it into a well groomed garden. The cool night air felt good on her skin, but she still could not get comfortable. She wanted Anders to be here now. The anticipation was slowly driving her mad. She looked up at the sky and sent a silent pray that he would walk through the door soon.

Anders stopped at the entrance to Leigh's home afraid to try the door. Would it be open or worse locked? He could not decide which one would hurt more. He took a deep breath and held it as he turn the doorknob. The door opened slowly without so much as a creak. Inside it was quiet. Bohdan was nowhere to be seen neither was his son. The house was dark save for a few candles burning to light the stairway up to the top floor. He slowly shut the door behind him and ventured in further. His heart hammered in his chest as he climbed the stairs up to Leigh's room. Half way up the steps Anders noticed her door was open. Both relief and dread filled him. A sound of soft footfalls made him freeze on the stairs. They came from behind him making him spin around. A very large brown hound stood at the bottom of the stairs staring at him. The dog appraised the person in front of him with curiosity. Being a cat person Anders could not be sure if the dog was readying to attack or just trying to size him up.

"Easy boy, I was invited." Tovis cocked his head to the side and let out a soft whine. After a few more seconds of man and beast staring at each other Tovis broke the gaze and headed back to his bed by the fire place. Once the dog had curled himself back up Anders stared back up the stairs. It did not take him but a moment to make it to the door of Leigh's room. The sight that greeted him was something he was not expecting. The woman he loved was standing by her fireplace staring into the flames. The light of the fire danced off of her gown and her skin bathing her in ethereal light. She looked deep in thought. She was the most beautiful woman that he had ever laid eyes on. His feet carried him into the room of their own will. Leigh must have heard him because she turned just after he crossed the threshold of her room.

"You came!" In her voice sounded relief and joy. "I thought you might changed your mind." Seeing her turn to face him fully only made him ache for her more. The nightgown hugged her ever curve and dipped enough in the front he could see the swell of her breasts. He felt like he was walking into a dream. That she would disappear in a puff smoke if he tried to touch her. A warm smile donned his lips as he stopped just shy of her.

"Justice does not approve of my obsession with you. It is one of the few thing that we disagree on."

"I was about to come looking for you. I was worried something happened to you."

"When I was in the Circle love was just a game. It gave the Templars too much power if there was something you could not stand to lose." His face turned sad and he turned away from her. Leigh saw pain etched in his eyes. "It would kill me to lose you." She closed the distance between them wanting to make that pain go away.

"You aren't going to lose me. I am here and always will be." His hand reached up to cup her cheek. Leigh felt waves of magic flow into her skin from his touch. A shiver of pleasure ran down her spine.

"No mage I have ever known has dared to fall in love. This is a rule I will most cherish breaking." His lips met hers in a tender kiss. Leigh's arms wrapped around him pulling his body closer to hers. Anders deepened the kiss and all doubt fell away. He wanted this, he wanted her now and for the rest of his life. Leigh broke the kiss long enough to shut her bedroom door. She did not want to be interrupted by anyone. She returned to his side and took him in her arms again. The slow tender kisses made way for more forceful passionate ones. Hands roamed over trembling bodies of their own accord. Leigh tried to undo the clasps that held his heavy coat on his body, but her normally deft fingers fumbled. She felt him smile against her mouth as his hands captured hers. "Let me do that." The tenor of his voice sent shock waves right to her stomach and below. With a few quick flicks of his wrist he had the clasps undone and shrugged himself out of the coat. Leigh's hands pulled at his linen undershirt so she could feel his bare skin. He shuttered under her cool fingers as they moved up his stomach to his chest. She felt his heart thrumming under his skin and knew hers was racing just as fast. Without breaking their kiss she started to walk backwards to her bed and he willingly followed kicking off his boots as they went.

Leigh laid herself down on the bed and pulled him down with her. Anders sought out her neck placing kisses from her jaw to her shoulder. A soft moan escaped her lips as he lightly nibbled on the sensitive skin where her neck and shoulder met. He watched her eyes roll up in to her head in ecstasy. The feel of her silken gown under his fingertips was driving him crazy. It was a barrier he wanted gone, but he was not about to rush this night. He had learned the longer the foreplay the better the ending. He shifted their bodies so they could be beside one another. Their eyes met and both could see the fire of passion in the others eyes.

"I love you." Leigh's voice was a trembling whisper. Anders placed his hand on the side of her neck and let it slip down her bare arm. A glittering trail was left in it's wake. It made her skin tingle. He did the same to the front of her neck to the top of her gown. Each touch made Leigh's breath hitch and her body shiver with pleasure. An amused smirk came to his lips while he watched her reactions. "That's not fair, you have a advantage I will never have." Her voice came out breathless and shaky.

"Would you like me to stop then?" His voice was husky with want.

"Not on your life. I have never felt anything like this before." Taking that as permission he pulled up the side of her nightgown and ran his hands from her knee to her breast leaving that same glowing trail on her bare skin. "Holy Maker." She pulled at his shirt til she was able to get it over his head. It was his turn to moan when she placed hard wet kissed along his chest and neck. Her hands gripped his neck possessively and pulled him closer to claim his mouth again. Anders was a bit surprised at how comfortable she was with this. Instead of being shy she was forceful. Her fingers played with the Tevinter Chantry amulet she had given him. A thoughtful smile came to her face. "I thought you said it was too dangerous to wear this?"

"Well, it was a gift from a very ravishing woman so I decided what the hell." His own fingers played with her necklace, but his face turned from joking to sincere. "The fact it came from you means I would wear it regardless if it meant death for me or not. You have stood beside me from the beginning even after I gave you every reason not to. I..." Her lips cut him off with a soft sweet kiss. Leigh did not need to hear those words to know he loved her. He was here that is what mattered. The kiss became more forceful again before Leigh broke away to roll off the bed. Anders propped himself up on his elbows watching her with confusion on his face. She gave him a devilish look as she hooked her thumbs on the straps of her gown. She pulled the straps off her shoulders with a agonizing slowness til her gown fell to the ground like a silvery puddle. She wore nothing under the nightgown and Anders felt a wave of heat travel from his stomach to his nether region. Her body perfect as far as he was concerned. It was supple and well proportioned. He could not take his eyes off of her as she took off her amulet and placed it on her dresser. Her eyes sparkled as she crept up the bed to were he was laying. She looked like a cat stalking it's prey which only made ache more for her. "I guess I am over dressed." She nodded and began to untie the string that held his trousers on his body.

Leigh did not look at him while she hooked her fingers on the pants to pull them down. He lifted his hips off the bed to make her job easier. Once both his smallclothes and pants were discarded on her floor Leigh crawled up the bed to hover over him. Anders tangled his fingers in her hair bring her naked body against his own so he could taste her lips again. She rocked her hips against him teasingly and she heard him growl into her mouth. Anders couldn't take it anymore his head felt like it was spinning and ache between his legs could only be quelled by sheathing himself in her heat. With one swift movement he wrapped his arms around her and pinned her beneath him. Anders bit her lower lip as he eased himself into her center. Her back arched off the bed to let him fill her completely.

Their bodies moved slow not wanting to rush the feeling of ecstasy they both had. Anders rocked his hips down as Leigh rolled hers up to meet him. Her nails raked his back while his mouth busied itself with her nipples. Her moans became higher in pitch with each thrust. She ran her fingers through his hair and lifted his head up to hers. He planted kisses as he went up to her lips. Their kisses had been heated before, but it did not compare to them now. Tongues battled, teeth nibbled and hands roamed while their bodies remained connected. Leigh pushed his shoulders so that she could flip them over. She sat straight up on his lap and slowly moved her hips in a circular motion. His eyes fluttered closed and a low groan sounded from him. Sweat began to trickle down her chest making her body slippery as his hands moved up her stomach to cup her breasts. Leigh could feel herself building to her release. Her hips rocked harder and faster against him, her breath coming out in pants and she moaned loudly. Anders felt her insides tighten around him and his hands gripped her hips holding her hard against him. Leigh's head fell back and she cried to the heavens when she came. Anders was not far behind her. He ground his hips into her with one last hard thrust and his essence flowed into her. Leigh lowered herself onto his chest trying to catch her breath and slow her heart. She felt his arms wrap around her and placed a kiss on the top of her head. The sound of his heart thrumming under her ear lulled her to sleep. Anders stayed awake a little while longer watching her sleep. He brushed her hair out of her eyes and saw a smile playing on her lips. It made his heart swell to see her happy. The fluffy comfort of her bed made it hard for him to stay awake. His eyes started to close and the last thing he remembered doing before falling asleep was covering them up.

Anders woke to the feeling he was being watched. He shot up in the bed and it took him a moment to remember where he was. Looking to his left he saw Leigh was no longer in bed. A soft whining sound made him look to the end of the bed. There stood her Mabari hound Tovis staring intently at the mage.

"What did I take your spot on the bed?" The hound tilted it's head then gave a small growl. "I will take that as a yes. Sorry old boy, but three would have been a crowd." The dog let out a humph and left the room. "What do these people see in dogs? I will never understand it." Finding himself alone made Anders feel a little bit put off. He saw her gown hanging on a hook near her dresser which meant to him she was up and dressed for the day. "Guess I better get dressed as well and go back to my hovel. It was nice at least to sleep in a warm soft bed for one night." It did not take him long to find his clothes and start putting them back on. He had everything on save his boots and his coat when a voice sounded from the door way.

"You're leaving already?" He turned to find Leigh in her house finery holding a tray of food in one hand and a bottle of wine in the other. "I thought you would at least stay and eat before going back to the clinic for the day." Something in her voice told him he had hurt her feelings.

"I...Maker I am bad at this." She stood stark still like a scared deer. Her eyes seem to plead with him not to break her heart. "I told you I have never been in love before and I don't know the proper way to act in all this. We never stayed the night or even more than the time it took to...well when I saw you weren't here I thought it was my cue to leave." Leigh let out a strangled giggle and put the tray and wine down and made her way to him.

"I thought you might be hungry when you woke up so I made breakfast for us. I don't want you to go unless you want to." His gaze shifted to the tray and his mouth began to water. There on two plates where eggs, bacon, what looked like homemade biscuits and some fruit. "Eat at least before you leave, please. You don't eat enough." Her concern made him feel like a cad for thinking she wanted him gone after their lovemaking the night before.

"Blame Justice, for that. Fade spirits don't have to eat to live, so when he is helping me heal he seems to forget I need to rest or eat."

"Well next time I talk to him I will be sure to tell him to give you a break. Now eat." Her voice sounded firm, but her eyes had a hint of mischief in them. Anders sat on the edge of the bed and took the plate she offered him. The first bit of the food seemed to melt in his mouth. He could not help himself and let out a groan of enjoyment. It took all his will power not to gobble the entire meal down greedily. Leigh picked at her food while she watched him eat. A small swell of silent pride came over her as she saw his eyes roll back into his head with each bite. "Has it been that long since you have had a decent meal?"

"Not really, the meal your mother made for all of us was very good, but this, this is heavenly." A flush of crimson rushed up her face

"I am glad you like my cooking. I thought I would have been a bit rusty since I haven't had any one to cook for for a while. Orana does most of the cooking for my mother so I just stopped."

"You cooked this?"

"Yes." "_Decent meal check, pretty girl? Definitely check and the right to shoot lightning at fools I am still working on, but two out of three isn't bad at all."_

"You know what they say about feeding strays right?" She shook her head and gave him a questioning look. "Once you feed them they never go away."

"Good because I don't want you to leave."

"You want me to stay here? With you?"

"Yes Anders I want you to stay here with me. In this house, in this room and in my bed. I love you and I want you to stay."

"You know that what you want will put you in danger. If the Templars find me you could be hung just for knowing me let alone having me in your home."

"If the Templars take you from me then I would welcome death. I don't want to have them over shadow our lives. You are safe here with me. I won't let them take you away and if they try then I will fight to keep you safe."

"Your crazy, but I...I love you I have been holding back saying it. I wanted you to have a normal life not stuck with a fugitive with not future." She cupped his chin and gave him a a slow passionate kiss.

"You have a future and she is sitting right here. It is still somewhat dark out so why don't we go back to bed for a little bit before the day jumps up and bites us."

"Sounds good to me. Should I leave my clothes on or take them off?" His eyebrow arched as he gave her a devilish grin.

"I think off, yes off would be better. This way we won't have to remove them and take precious time away from ourselves."

"I like the way you think Leigh. No wonder I love you."

"I love you too and always will."

Leigh flopped herself down on one of the benches at the Hanged Man. It had been two weeks since she had asked Anders to stay with her and those two weeks had been busy. Between helping Aveline and hunting down a deranged killer Leigh felt like she wanted to go to bed for a year and take Anders with her. She had not told anyone about their relationship yet except for Isabela. It surprised Leigh a bit that the lady pirate did not spread this piece of gossip, all she did was smile and wink.

"So Hawke how are things?"

"Things are fine Isabela. How are you?"

"I would think it would be more than fine since you got the man you want. So how is he?"

"He is over there ask him yourself." Leigh knew what her friend meant, but she was never one to kiss and tell.

"Oh your no fun. What are you afraid that some of the others won't approve?"

"I am sure Fenris will just jump for joy and Sebastian will give his blessing. Neither of them like Anders much and then there is Aveline who has taken it upon herself to act like a protective older sister to me. I just want to keep it under wraps for a while longer."

"Isn't it obvious those two have a thing for you? You should see the way the choir boy looks at you, it is all puppy eyed and sweet. Then there is mister broody, he stares too, but his is more of a straight lust thing. That and he wants to keep you away from Anders."

"Maker's mercy this is all I need. This could get really awkward and ugly."

"But it'd be one hell of a show."

"Thanks Isabela what are you going to do sell tickets?"

"Maybe I would make a lot of coin that way, but oh the humanity of wasting three perfect male bodies."

"Your horrible, but right. It would be a shame to mar those bodies. Thank you by the way."

"For what?"

"For not telling anyone about us yet. It was hard enough trying to explain to my mother why he was moving in."

"What did your mother say?"

"She...she found us in bed together one morning last week."

"You two weren't engaged in anything were you?"

"Maker, no just sleeping in each others arms, albeit naked, but that is besides the point. I hadn't had a chance to tell her with us running around so much. She just laughed and walked out of my room."

"No screaming or telling him to get his hands off her daughter? I must say I am a little let down by her." Leigh rolled her eyes at her fellow rogue.

"My mother married a mage. She just told me I was a chip off the old block. She did tell me to lock my door from now on though." Isabela gave a hardy chuckle making all their friends turn to look at the two women.

"What are you two over there whispering about Rivani?" Varric looked over his mug of ale before taking another sip.

"Oh nothing Hawke was just telling me about something she use to do back in Ferelden. I just found it funny."

"It is nothing really I was just telling Isabela how I use to get the Templars to chase me when they got too close to my family." All eyes were on her now and she cursed in her head for even bringing it up. Taking a big gulp of her own ale to stall for as long as she could, hoping they would let it go, but she knew better. "You really don't want to hear this do you?"

"It would be a great side story for my epic tale I am spinning about you." She glared at her dwarven friend, but he just laughed at her.

"Fine, fine I will tell you. At least this way I will know there might be some truth to the tale. I was about ten I think. It was when the Templars were doing a huge sweep for apostates after they had a rash of blood mages surface. Our neighbor was a mean old bastard and he hated my father, so he told the Templars he was a mage to get rid of him. Now he did not know my father was really a mage, he just hated him that much. When the Templars came to our house my father and sister ran and hid, but the Templars were close behind them. I ran as fast as I could to catch up to the Templars and screamed bloody murder. I told them I saw a monster in my neighbor's field and led them there. You should have seen the old man's face. I had never seen that color puce on anything before. He cursed and screamed my father was the one they wanted. Then he made a mistake and tried to hit me for lying. The Templars grabbed him and took him away for a few weeks so they could test him."

"So the Templars never found your father or Sunshine?"

"No, but the old man was found out to be a blood mage that had killed a few families in the Bannorn."

"Your shitting me?"

"Maker's honest truth. No wonder the bastard hated my father and this is also the reason that I hate most blood mages." Merrill looked up from her mug and Leigh could have sworn she saw tears in the elf's eyes. "Oh Merrill I didn't mean you. I still have hope that you will give it up, your magic is powerful enough without using blood to fuel it. Plus you are way to sweet to be a blood mage." This made Merrill smile even as most of the rest of their companions gave Leigh a exasperated look. Leigh wanted to change the subject before this turned into a fight. "So Aveline any more information come across on what happened to Ser Emeric?"

"No, It looks like he was murdered by those shades. I have the Knight Captain breathing down my neck to find the culprit, but we have no new clues to who could have done this. Sorry Hawke."

"Your doing everything you can, don't be sorry. We will find whoever it is I am sure." Leigh let out a yawn, feeling the combination of the day and the ale catch up with her. Her eyes met Anders'and he nodded telling her it was time to call it a night. Well everyone I'm beat so I am going to go home for the night I shall see you all tomorrow. Anders do you need me to walk you back to the clinic?"

"That would be lovely, yes. Shall we be off then?" She rose from the bench and headed for the door with Anders not far behind her. Once they had both walked out the door Varric turned to the others shaking his head.

"When are those two just going to give up this charade and tell us they are together already?"

"So you all know?"

"Yes Rivani we all know. It is hard not to notice how close they stand next to one another or the looks they give each other. Why how long have you known?"

"Oh not long, but I bet it was longer than any of you." The pirate queen slung back her glass and gave Varric a wry smile. "I think they look cute together and maybe Hawke can make him loosen up a bit. I remember him being a lot more fun before he left Ferelden. I swear Kirkwall just sucks the fun right out of people."

"I wouldn't say that." When Varric looked down the table and saw the sour look on both Fenris and Sebastian's faces he corrected his statement. "Well then again maybe it does." Fenris jumped up from his seat and stalked out the door. Not too long after Sebastian bid everyone a good night and left also. "Why do I have a feeling those two are not going to let the lovebirds be happy?"

"Give it time Varric they will get over it. Well that or Hawke will put them both in their place. She is very protective of Anders and he is not helpless either."

"I hope your right Red or Kirkwall is in a lot of trouble and we have enough of that already. No use worrying about it now, we will just have to be ready when it happens. I am laying bets that is the shit does hit the wall that Hawke will be the one who puts a stop to it."


	10. Chapter 10

Anders hands rubbed the back of Leigh's shoulders as they headed for their home. They had spent the last half of the day searching for the blood mage Gascard Dupuis. They had found him hiding in Darktown from the Templars who think he was the one who murdered Ser Emeric. He had offered to use his blood magic to help them find the real killer, but Leigh had no desire to let him. Blood magic had always made her uncomfortable. She tolerated Merrill's because the elf did not use it very often and she had hope that maybe with enough support she would give it up.

"All I want to do when we get home is take a nice hot bath and slip under the covers. I don't care if it is not night yet, this hunt for the murderer is driving me nuts."

"How can you be sure that we just didn't leave the man who did this back in Darktown?" Leigh stopped walking and turned to look at Anders. He did raise a good point. For most people they would not be able to tell if the man had been lying or not, but she was not most people. Because Pash could look into the hearts of mortals. She could tell Leigh he was not lying.

"Just call it rogue's intuition." Anders rolled his eyes at her and pushed her forward toward home. "It is frustrating not to be any closer to finding this animal. It is tricky enough for people around here without having some deranged idiot making it worse."

"We'll find him Leigh. He will make a mistake sooner or later. Hopefully it will be before anyone else gets hurt."

"I hope so too. I have enough to worry about with the Qunari." She rubbed her temples as just the thought of them made her head ache. Anders covered her hands with his and sent soothing waves into her temples. The dull ache in her head began to ease. Leigh let out a content sigh as she leaned back into his chest. When he was done working his spell Anders wrapped her in a tight embrace. "You always know how to make me feel better."

"Someone has to. You run around helping all of us and never really ask for anything in return."

"I have what I need right in front of me." Her fingers played with the feathers on his jacket. The warm bright smile she gave him made Anders give her a soft kiss on top of her head.

"Is that why your mother sat me down last night and gave me the "if you hurt my daughter speech"?" Leigh looked up at him and her eyes narrowed ever so slightly.

"When did she do that?"

"After you went to sleep I went down to the larder. Your mother was sitting in the study and she told me she wanted to talk."

"Maker, what did she say?"

"She asked me if I was as serious about you as you are about me, to which I answered yes. Then she told me not to break your heart, to which I stated I would try my hardest not to. She talked about your father and what a great man he was. She told me I reminded her of him. She also told me she was happy you had so many friends to count on."

"Growing up we couldn't stay in one place to long for fear of the Templars. I couldn't make friends because I knew I would one day have to leave them behind. This is the first time I am not afraid to put down roots and let people in. So did she say anything else?"

"Just for me to take care of you. She worries when you go running out the door on some mission. She fears each time will be the last she sees you alive." Leigh frowned at that news.

"Why hasn't she told me that?" Before Anders could answer her a figure walking by them caught his eye. He cursed softly under his breath making Leigh look behind them. A small gasp came from her as she saw her sister. It had been over three years since she had last seen Bethany and in that time she had changed. Leigh wondered why Anders had cursed then she saw who was standing beside Bethany, Cullen had noticed them and stopped. He gave Leigh a polite smile as he walked toward them. Bethany on the other hand had a very sour look on her face. It was one her sister had never seen before. "Bethany!" Leigh went to hug her sister, but Bethany flinched away from her. "Bethany? What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Ser Cullen can we go please?"

"In a moment. You should say hello to your sister Beth." Cullen gave Leigh apologetic look.

"Hello, there happy can we go?"

"Bethany why are you acting like this? I haven't seen you in years and you act like I am some evil creature."

"I am not acting like anything, sister. I wouldn't want to keep you from making a name for yourself."

"What the hell is that suppose to mean?"

"I have been in the Gallows for three years and not once have you come to see me. It is like you forgot I exist. You are too busy getting coin and making a name for yourself to be bothered with your baby sister."

"That is not true. I miss you every day Beth. There is not a day that goes by that I don't wish you were with me and Mama. How can you think I would ever forget about you?"

"Forget I said it then. I want to go Cullen please now!" Leigh grabbed her sister's arm a heartbroken look on her face. Bethany shook her off and glared at her. "I use to feel sorry for you having to give up your life to take care of me, but I wonder how long did it take you to forget about me. A day, a week maybe it wasn't even that long. I wish it had been you the ogre got instead of Carver at least he wouldn't have abandoned me. You go live your normal life Leigh, maybe if you had been born a mage you would understand, but then again maybe you wouldn't." Leigh backed away from her sister as if she had been hit. Anders stared at Bethany as she stormed away for them. He wanted to go after the girl and shake sense into her. How could she think Leigh abandoned her to the Gallows?

"Leigh I am sorry. I had no idea she was this angry at you. Had I known I would never have forced the issue." Cullen's voice was soft.

"She hates me. I haven't come to see her because that bitch Meredith won't let me. I..." Her voice died in the throat as she fought the tears that were starting to fall down her cheeks. Her body quaked with anger. To have her own sister turn on her was something she never thought would happen. Leigh's eyes narrowed at the retreating form of Bethany. She wanted nothing more than to run after her and make her understand. She wanted to tell her everything, but she couldn't. Being bound did not allow her to speak of what she was. It was a promise she and her father had made. To break it would have terrible consequences for everyone she held dear.

"I think you better go Ser Cullen." Anders took Leigh in his arms to lead her home. He tried to keep his voice level, but fell short. He hated to admit it, but he was jealous of Cullen for being with Leigh even if it was years before he had met her. He also loathed the Templar for hurting her both back then and when he took Bethany away. Justice screamed in his head to take vengeance for those trespasses alone, but for Leigh's sake he held Justice in check.

"I will talk to her Leigh. I promise." Leigh nodded and clung to her love's coat. Her hands twisted in the fabric as she tried to stop herself from shaking.

"Please just take me back to our home love, I want to forget this day ever happened." Cullen winced hearing her say their home. She had done what he hoped she wouldn't. She fell for Anders even after his warnings. Fire raged in him as he watched the mage kiss her forehead, whispering it would be alright. Without another word Cullen turned on his heels and followed after his charge. "I swear if I ever get the chance I am going to make Meredith pay for this."

"I will help you." She gave him a weak smile knowing full well he would make good on that statement. "I know what we can do, we can make a straw doll of her and place it in front of the Gallows. I will set it on fire and then we can watch her blow her top from a distance." Leigh stopped mid stride and stared at him opened mouthed. A small hysterical giggle escaped her lips before turning into a full out laughing fit. She could picture the Knight Commander raging and yelling. The picture in her head was priceless.

"Your utterly mad you know that right?" He gave her his signature smirk and his eyes twinkled with a mischievous light. "I love you for it though. Sane is boring."

"Then you will never be bored with me my lady. I have never been sane."

"I wouldn't have you any other way. I want to get home and talk to Mama, maybe she can talk some sense into my darling sister." He nodded and wrapped his arm around her waist as they walked back to their home. It was still strange to call it that. He had not had a real home since he was a boy, it was both comforting and a bit scary. It did not take them long to thread their way back home. Even from outside the thick door Leigh could hear her uncle yelling at someone. After the day she had this was not something she needed. She was quite prepared to go in there and throw Gamlen out on his ass.

"No Le- An- Dra. Stupid dwarf."

"Uncle do not ever call Sandal stupid again or I will kick you from one side of Kirkwall to the other. Now what are you doing here and why are you yelling at the boy?"

"I came here looking for your mother. She never showed up for her weekly visit. Do you know where she is?"

"I haven't seen her since we left this morning. Maybe she went out to the market and lost track of time. Let me see if Orana or Bohdan know where she might be." Leigh headed for the kitchen since it was close to dinner time. Both the dwarf and the elf were busy making different dishes. "Have either of you seen my mother since this morning?"

"She said she was going out to see your uncle, mistress. She left the house after the flowers arrived late this morning." Orana went to fetch the flowers to show Leigh.

"Flowers? Does she have a suitor that she hasn't told me about?"

"Here they are mistress. White lilies and so beautiful too." Ice shot down Leigh's spine and her stomach felt like it fell to her feet. "_No, they can't be from that murderer. It has to be a coincidence that's all, right? Right?"_

"Did you see the person who delivered them?"

"They came by messenger. It was one who has been here many times before. Jareth I think his name is."

"He is that young boy who I see running around Hightown right?"

"Yes messare."

"Bohdan could you please go and get Sebastian and Fenris for me? I am sure my mother is just shopping, but I would still like help tracking her down. If nothing else it will put my uncle's mind at ease." With a nod the old dwarf disappeared through to door to do as she asked. Without realizing it Leigh began to pace the kitchen. Her mind played out scenarios both good and bad.

"Love, are you alright?" Anders voice made her jump.

"These arrived for my mother this morning after we left." She handed him one of the lilies and it took him a moment before his eyes went wide.

"White lilies. Leigh you don't think..." She cut him off before he could put into words what she feared.

"No, they might just be from a suitor or maybe a neighbor. There would be no reason for her to be a target for that monster. Right?"

"We should go out and look for her. I sent your uncle home just in case she shows up there." Fear nipped at her mind, she gripped Anders hand tightly. She was happy to have him as support. If she had been by herself she would have gone over the edge by now. After meeting up with Sebastian and Fenris they went and searched Leandra's normal haunts. They headed to Lowtown last when everywhere else produced nothing. Varric and Merrill met up with them after running into Gamlen.

"We asked around if anyone had seen her Hawke, but nobody has." Leigh gave a stiff nod to the dwarf and kept walking. She feared if she stopped her fear would freeze her to the spot. As they cleared the lower part of the market she heard her uncle's voice. She found him standing in front of a young street urchin with his hands on the boy's already torn and tattered clothes. He shook the boy viciously as he screamed at him. Leigh grabbed her uncle and spun him away from the boy into a nearby wall.

"Enough, you can't expect him to answer you if you are going to throttle him to death."

"He said he saw your mother here earlier today, but won't tell me where she went or who was with her. Little bastard is holding out for coin when your mother's life is in danger." Gamlen glared at the boy. Leigh gave her uncle a warning look and turned to the boy. She knelt down to his level so she could look him in the eye.

"The woman you saw earlier was my mother and I am very worried for her safety. I will make it worth your while if you tell me what you saw." Leigh opened her hand and the boy's eyes widened. What was there could feed and cloth his family for almost half a year.

"I saw the lady walking to the slums over there and some bloke came up to her and asked her for help. He was bleeding so she let him lean on her. I didn't see his face, but I know he was human. He was too big to be an elf. They headed that way." The boy pointed in the direction of the foundry district. Leigh felt like her heart was hit by a frost spell. "He was bleeding pretty bad and stumbled a lot." She handed him the coin and gave him the best smile she could muster.

"Thank you now run along home the streets are not safe after dark." Her eyes scanned the street til they found a small puddle of blood. She torn off in the direction with her friends close behind her. The more blood she found the faster she ran. The trail led her straight to the foundry she had been in over three years ago searching for another lost woman. Now it was her mother who was missing and she prayed she was not too late.

The group fought their way through the tunnels underneath the foundry. There was no denying that the person responsible for this was a blood mage. They had already found the body of the woman they had seen in Gascard's home. The body was whole save for the feet were missing. Further down the tunnels Leigh found something that made her blood run cold, Her mother's amulet. It had been a gift from her father with three stones on it representing Leigh and her siblings. She clutched the trinket in her hand to her chest.

"This is my mother's. We need to hurry." She ran off ahead of the others. Varric and Anders shared a look. Both knowing if Leandra was hurt or dead Leigh would never forgive herself.

"I got a bad feeling about this Blondie."

"Me too, this place just feels wrong, evil." They heard Leigh scream and it set them all running. "Holy Maker!" Leigh was surrounded by shades, abominations, and a rage demon the two rogues broke to one side while the mages and warrior rolled to the other. "Leigh get out of there!" She did not wait for him to finish his sentence, a cloud surrounded her and she vanished only to reappear behind the rage demon. She struck with both blades in it's back twisting them as she went. The demon turned to attack her and was hit by a freezing spell. Leigh whipped her head around and saw Anders standing a few feet from her with his hand out.

"Hey Hawke, I could use a little help here." Shades surrounded Varric backing him into a corner. Leigh rolled around the frozen demon letting Fenris finish it off with a mighty swing. She raced across the room, flipping over the shades to land in front of of her friend. Her blades lashed out at a blinding speed, slicing and stabbing as they went. The sounds of arrows screaming past her head made her duck down to give Sebastian a clear shot. As the last of the shades faded back into the earth the group tried to catch their breath.

"Does anyone need healing?"

"I think we are all fine, but Hawke you will want to take a look at this." Leigh walk up behind Fenris and found him looking at a painting. Her hand flew to her mouth to stifle a scream.

"That looks like my mother! What the hell is going on here?"

"It looks like he lives down here. I found a few books on necromancy on the shelves as well as other volumes that should not have ever been written. I want to set fire to this entire library so it doesn't fall into anyone elses hands." Anders turned and gave Merrill a look and she just nodded. The look on Leigh's face made the elf not want to argue.

"When we leave here you can torch whatever you want love. Right now I want to find the animal who is doing all of this." "_I feel blood magic up ahead and pain, so much pain. You must tread carefully." "If he has hurt my mother there is no carefully, he will pay in blood." "It will not ease the pain to kill him." "I don't care." "Yes you do."_

"_I can feel the blood mage ahead of us my friend." "So can I, he is powerful. We have to make sure we protect our friends." "They are your friends not mine, but I will do as you ask." "I am worried about Leigh, she looks like she is ready to explode." _Justice stayed silent not knowing how to answer. He could feel her anger, her thirst for vengeance if her mother is hurt. Leigh headed to where the power was coming from, it did not take her long to find the mage.

"Leandra said you would come for her. She has so much faith in you." Leigh could see the form of a woman sitting in the chair right behind the blood mage. "Your mother has become part of something bigger than herself. I pieced her together from memory, now I have my beloved back with me. I have touched the face of the Maker and lived." Before Leigh could retort the woman rose from the chair, her movements choppy. The woman turned around, Leigh shrieked at the sight. It was her mother's head sewn onto a patchwork body. It was a cruel mockery of life. With a feral snarl Leigh flew at the mage daggers bared, he quickly threw up a shield around himself. She stopped just short of hitting the shield and watched him cut his palm open to call forth more demons before he backed away from the fray.

"Fenris watch out!" Merrill threw a stonefist spell at a the desire demon that appeared behind him. Sebastian and Varric covered Anders and Fenris as they cut through the swarm of demons. "Anders, move back and heal I will help Fenris." He nodded and fell back from the battle as Merrill stepped forward. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Leigh charge the shielded mage again this time she broke through his shield. She slammed into him throwing them both through a magic barrier that cut the room off from the tunnels.

"Leigh! We have to end this now. She doesn't stand a chance against him." Anders fought like a man possessed to get to the woman he loves. The waves of demons seemed unending and his fear began to rise.

Leigh shook her head to clear it after breaking through the barrier. She could hear Quentin laughing at her from a few feet away. Gritting her teeth she rose to her feet, her knuckles white from gripping her daggers too tightly. "_Pash you have to unbind me." "Your powers are untested outside of the fade." "I don't care. This man butchered my mother, Pash. I can't defeat him like this. Please you have to let me do this. If I lose control you can rein me back in." "If you build up enough power I will not be able to stop you." "I can do this please." _

"I will not let you take her from me little girl. You and your friends will die here and my beloved and I will live our lives in peace." Quentin stalked around her, sneering as a ball of lightning formed in his hands. "Don't worry I won't let your bodies go to waste. I will give my beloved a family to watch over." His maniacal laughter stoked the rage Leigh was feeling. Waves of calming magic from her amulet muted it down. "_You need to keep your head and not let your rage dictate you actions here or you will lose control of your powers. Remember what your father taught you."_ Leigh took a deep breath and tried to center herself all the while keeping a eye on the mage.

"I will not let you hurt anyone else. You butchered these women. Your a monster." She felt a surge of magic begin to course through her veins. Pash has released her powers. Leigh sheathed her daggers and stood up to face her mother's killer.

"I am not a monster. Would you not give anything to have the person you love with you again?"

"I would not kill innocent people to bring back a loved one. You demean her memory with this senseless act. Now you will pay for what you have done to all those women." Quentin screaming with rage and threw the lightning ball at her. With one fluid motion she batted it aside. His eyes grew wide with shock, her eyes glowed a hellish red and a wicked smile crossed her lips. Her skin looked like it was cracking and red lines ran over her. "As you can see you I too can use magic and I am sure mine is stronger than yours."

"I doubt that child. You just got lucky blocking that blast. Though it seems you have communed with demons too. What right do you have to condemn me?" A low evil laugh sounded from Leigh, her hands became wreathed in flames. The flames made clawed gauntlets over her hands.

"I have communed with no demons. This power is all my own." She lashed out at him and the gauntlets left deep gashes on his chest. Quentin stumbled back holding his chest, fear shone in in his insane eyes. Desperate to stop Leigh he cast another blood spell. Tendrils of blood wrapped around her and began to squeeze. Leigh found it hard to breath, rage welled in her and her powers began to reach their peak. In the back of her head she heard Pash screaming at her to calm down, her survival instinct was taking over. Just before she gave in to her powers she heard her father's voice as if he was standing right next to her.

"Do not give in to you anger and fear. It makes your magic sloppy and unpredictable. You control it, it does not control you. Your power is a gift and a curse. Do not let it be more of a curse than it has to be. Always use it with a clear head, Leigh. Out of the three of you children you have the most level head on your shoulders. I am so very proud of you, never doubt that. Let your magic serve what is best in you, not that which is most base." With a deep breath Leigh reined in her magic and focused it on the blood ropes that held her. She dropped to the floor holding her side were the tendrils cut into her. She was bleeding , but not badly. Quentin was looking pale from blood loss and she could feel his magic fading.

"Wh...what are you? It can't end like this not when I am so close to having everything I want."

"I am the daughter of one of the women you murdered and it will end, you have a choice how it ends. You can surrender and I will let the Templars have you or you can fight and I will be forced to kill you. I will be far more merciful then the Templars since you killed one of their own." A look of hate stuck on the blood mage's face. he howled, running at her with a small work dagger. Leigh side stepped him and plunged her own dagger deep into his heart. His hand slowly touched her face before he fell limp in her arms. Leigh gently set him down on the ground and sank to her knees. The sounds of her friends battling echoed through the tunnels. On shaky legs she got to her feet and headed to help them. "_Thank you Pash." "You are welcome and I am proud of you. You kept your anger in check." _"He was insane with grief and not worth losing myself to."

Anders fought to keep his friends standing against the demons. His magic was almost spent and they were out of lyrium potions. His focus was pulled in too many directions. He wanted to go find Leigh, his fear made his magic not as potent. The fact he had felt a massive surge of magic from the direction he had seen Leigh disappear to did not help the situation. He saw the barrier that she went through fall and a dark figure moving in the tunnels headed toward them. A skeleton warrior ran at the tunnel and fell back with a dagger in it's head. Leigh limped out of the shadows holding her side and covered in blood. Relief washed over him seeing her alive. She looked at her friends and gave a weak smile seeing they were all alive and well. The sound of uneven steps behind her made her turn around. The patchwork woman with her mother's head stumbled and fell into her arms. Leigh sank to the ground cradling the woman to her.

"I knew you would come and save me." Leigh brushed some stray hairs from her mother's eyes as she shook her head viciously.

"I wasn't fast enough."

"This was not your fault Leigh. At least I will see your father again and Carver, but you will be here all alone."

"I am not alone. I'll be alright Mama." Anders felt helpless. He knew there was nothing he could do, but his heart hurt seeing the pain this was causing the woman he loves.

"His magic was keeping her alive Leigh. There...there is nothing I can do."

"I know, love." Leandra's clouded eyes looked up at Anders and she gave him a motherly smile.

"You take care of my little girl. Promise me."

"I promise." Leandra closed her eyes.

"I love you Leigh." Her mother took one more quivering breath then was silent. Leigh leaned forward and rested her head against her mother's shoulder and cried. None of her friends wanted to move or speak. The only sounds were from her sobs. Anders was the only one who stood close. He looked back at the others, Merrill was crying and Varric did his best to comfort her. Sebastian was on his knees giving a silent prayer to the Maker for Leandra's soul. Fenris just stared at the ground not knowing how to act. They all had cared about Leigh's mother. She had welcomed them all into her home, she fed them, listened to them. She was a mother to all of them and now she was gone leaving them all with a hole in their hearts.

With not knowing what else to do Leigh's friends began to search through Quentin's things. They found Leandra's body on a cot in another room. Fenris grabbed Merrill by the arm and made her look. His lyrium tattoos glowed with his anger.

"Do you see what blood magic does? Take a good look because this is where you are heading. No good comes from this."

"Fenris let her go." Leigh stood in the doorway her face tracked with blood and tears. "Sebastian I need you to go to the Gallows and talk to Knight Captain Cullen. Please tell him to bring my sister here. We are giving these women peace without having people gawk and gossip about what happened to them."

"I will be back soon. I will also find Aveline for you."

"Thank you, Varric please go get Isabela. I want her here as well. The rest of us will will begin to make the pyres."

"On it Hawke." He gave her hand a squeeze and took off. Leigh turned to Merrill who looked like she wanted to just disappear.

"Fenris should not have done that Merrill. You are nothing like that man and if I have anything to say about it you never will be. Help me make my mother's pyre." Merrill nodded biting back tears. Leigh slipped her arm around the elf, both of them leaning on the other for support. By the time Varric and Sebastian returned the pyres had been assembled. Bethany leaned heavily on both Sebastian and Cullen. She looked around the room for her sister who was finishing the pile of forbidden books that would be the blood mages pyre. Leigh dusted off her hands before heading into the tunnel where she had defeated Quentin. Alone she dragged his body to the pile. Anders ran over to help her lift the larger man.

"Your sister is here with Cullen. You should go to her. I can finish this."

"I don't think my sister wants me anywhere near her right now. Aveline and Isabela are with her, she does not need me." The tone of her voice and the blank look on her face worried him. She was pushing through her grief instead of letting it come. Grabbing both her hands he pulled her to him holding her tightly. She struggled a little then went limp against his chest.

"You do not have to be strong for any of us, even Bethany."

"I will grieve, but not here, not now. I have to ask Sebastian to give last rights." She tried to push him away, but his grip tightened.

"I will ask him to do that. Go to your sister or I will drag you over there." The finality in his voice told her he meant it. She gave a curt nod and went to Bethany. The younger woman threw herself into her sister's arms and sob openly. Leigh smoothed her hair, telling her everything would be alright. Even if she did not believe it herself.

"Why are you giving him a funeral? Let him rot he deserves no better."

"If I leave him here to rot I will be no better than him, Beth. I leave it up to the Maker to punish him. My conscience will be clear."

"You sound like father." This brought a smile to both the girls faces. "Leigh, I'm sorry. I didn't know she wouldn't let you see me. I thought you were glad to be rid of having to keep me safe."

"Your my sister I never want to be rid of you. We are all the remains of the Hawke family."

"What about Uncle Gamlen?"

"He is nothing like us Beth. He has no sense of what it means to live on the run or sacrifice for your family." Bethany just nodded and let her head fall back onto Leigh's shoulder. They stood in silence til the last ember burned out. Leigh thanked Cullen for letting her sister say goodbye to their mother. Half their mother's ashes went with Leigh the other half with Bethany. The walk home was long and quiet, no one wanted to fill it with useless chatter. Gamlen was waiting for Leigh when she arrived home. She told him Leandra was gone, but did not tell him all of what happened. He blamed her at first, but she knew he did not mean it.

"At least you killed the bastard. I hope he suffered. You girls are all the family I have left. I know it does not mean much, but I am here if you need me." Leigh walked him out and retired to her room. There she let it all sink in, there she let herself have her grief. She did not hear Anders come in their room. He just sat next to her and pulled her close. The tears flowed freely and he just let her vent and scream. Words failed him, but there were no words to make any of it better. All he could do was be there for her, hold her when she cried, let her beat her fists against his chest when her anger flared again. She fell asleep in his arms clinging tightly to him as if he too would vanish on her. She had lost almost every thing and with each thing taken from her, a piece of herself went with it.


	11. Chapter 11

Leigh wanted to kill the woman in front of her. Mother Petrice stood next to the Grand Cleric with a smug look on her face. Petrice thought she would blame Saemus Dumar's death on Leigh. The rogue would have none of it. She was glad Sebastian was with her to witness it all. He had not believed her til they found the lost Qunari delegates being held by chantry fanatics, led by none other than Ser Varnell. Petrice's little lap dog. The Grand Cleric stared at the carnage in front of her and shook her head sadly.

"Serah Hawke has even turned Brother Sebastian against us with her lies."

"What do you say of this Sebastian?"

"Mother Petrice is lying Your Grace. She killed Saemus and planned to blame it on Hawke. She had been behind this all from the start. If I had not seen it with my own eyes I would not believe it either. She let innocent people be murdered just to start a war to wipe out the Qunari."

"People are leaving us and going to the Qunari. It is a sin that can not be allowed to continue."

"We must pray for the lost. If the Maker sees fit they will return to us. Send for the Captain of the Guard. This young mother has erred and will pay for her crimes against the city." The Grand Cleric began to walk back up the stairs. From the shadows a arrow screeched and hit Petrice in the stomach. Leigh recognized the arrow as being Qunari. The creak of a bow told Leigh that the young Mother's time was up. The second arrow struck Petrice in the head. The archer nodded at Leigh and she nodded back. She had learned enough from Fenris that this was justice to the Qunari people. She did respect them, even if she did not completely understand their culture. Her only complaint was how they treated their mages. It was barbaric and in her eyes wholly unnecessary. This city was on the verge of ripping itself apart and it was only a matter of which side would strike first. The people or Kirkwall or the Qunari.

OoO

"You pace any more and we will have to buy a new rug, love." Anders had watched her pace for over an hour from his desk in their study. The threat of Kirkwall imploding weighed on her mind.

"I swear this entire city is going to the Void. I am this close to heading back to Ferelden."

"Without me?" He put his hand over his heart and gave a mock look of hurt.

"Never without you. Your stuck with me."

"Stuck with you, huh?" Anders closed the distance and kissed her deeply. They haven't had many chances to just be alone together since Leandra died. His clinic had taken a up swing of patients and Leigh was busy with the entire Qunari mess. When they finally turned in for the night neither of them had the energy for anything other than sleep. "Well since we are stuck together how bout we take this to our room?"

"I thought you would never ask." Leigh jumped up and wrapped her legs around his waist. He had a feeling they were not going to make it to their bedroom. With one hand he held her to him, with the other he cleared off his desk in their study. He felt her smile against his lips, her hands twisted in his hair in attempt to bring him closer to her. "Maybe we should shut and lock the door. Our luck someone will barge in on us and get an eye full." Anders plopped her down on the desk and locked the door.

"If anyone knocks I swear I will set them on fire."

"Not before I tack them to the wall. Now get over here." He did not have to think twice, stepping between her legs his lips searched hers out again. Leigh let her hands slip under his coat and run up his chest. In the short time he had been staying with her he had put on some much needed weight. Instead of feeling his ribs all she could feel now was the taunt muscles over them. She felt him shiver under her touch. Their clothes came off with blinding speed both needing to feel the others skin pressed against theirs. Anders lifted her off the desk and spun them around pressing her back against the wall. Leigh let out a whimper with every thrust. It did not take either of them long to reach their ends. Her voice was breathless and her limbs felt like rubber. He eased her down til her feet hit the floor. Leigh felt him plant a kiss on her forehead before handing her discarded clothes back to her.

"I am never going to think of this desk the same way again or this wall." She gently smacked his arm before kissing him sweetly.

"You know we do have a lot more rooms in this house that we could...well you know." He threw his head back and laughed.

"Are you trying to be the death of me? I need a chance to recoup before we go at it again. You seem to forget I am older than you."

"Couldn't tell that by me. If I remember correctly weren't you the one who pushed for us to do it five times in one..." His finger silenced her

"And I am still trying to recover from that. If I had known you in my prime woman you would have been in trouble."

"Maker's breath you make it sound like your in your nineties. You can't be that much older than me."

"I am in my thirties and you my dear are still in your twenties." She rolled her eyes at him, but let it go. She did not want to ruin the blissful feeling she had. Leigh knew all to well that with all the tensions building in Kirkwall it was only a matter of time they would be out fighting again. She leaned her head against his chest and hugged him to her.

"I love you and that is all that matters."

"I love you too." Anders looked around the study and sighed. "Could I ask you to help me pick up this mess I made?"

"Of course. I can't have you throwing out a hip on me can I?" She giggled as she dodged crumpled balls of paper.

"Hold still dammit."

"What's the matter love can't hit a moving target?" He gave her a wicked smile and hit her with a glyph of paralysis. He heard her growl and her eyes glared at him.

"Now what did you say about a moving target?" Since her lips could not move all he could hear was grumbles. With a wave of his hand he released her.

"I have said this before you are an evil little apostate."

"And you my dear are an evil little rogue. We make a great pair don't we?"

"Yes we do. I am glad to have you here with me."

"I am glad to be here." Justice stirred a bit, but it was not to chide him on her being a distraction, which was surprising. _"She makes you happy." "Yes she does." "You should ask her to join in our fight. She would make a useful ally." "I can't do that to her. She has enough on her mind with the Qunari." "That threat will come and go, but our fight is far from over. She has already proven that she shares our views. Her position protects us from the Templars for now. Why not ask her?" "I am quite prepared to give my life for this cause, but I will not let her be pulled down with me. She is not a mage, this fight is not hers to fight. The fact she does makes me love her all the more, but she can walk away from this without having to worry about being hunted." "Are you so sure?" "What the hell does that mean?" "I am just saying there is more to her than what is seen by the outside world. Even if you tried to send her away do you think she would run? Do you think she would abandon you or anyone else she holds dear?" "No, and that is what scares me the most. To lose her at all would kill me." _

"Tell Justice I said hello." Leigh's voice broke him out of his conversation with his other half. She had a thoughtful look on her face as she looked up at him, pages of his manifesto clutched in her fingers. "While you two were talking I read some of this. It is very well written love, but a bit preachy. If you would like I could help you tone it down, at least for the common folk. I'm not so sure they will be able to get around those big words."

"You think it is preachy?"

"Not in a bad way. You raise very good points, but if I have learned anything from these last few years is that if you preach at a politician they tend to get a blank look and stop listening after a few moments. If you can get the commoners on your side it forces change that can not be ignored. There are more of them than there are Templars or clerics. Those are the people you have to reach first is the little guys like you and me."

"You should have gone into politics Leigh." He looked over his writings and saw what she meant. It was written for a highly educated person not the common people. _"I told you she can be a asset." "Fine I will let her help me with this then and nothing else. She says hello by the way." "I heard." _"Alright my lady let's get started." Leigh pulled up an extra chair and leaned into him while they went over his manifesto. It felt good to have her help him. He pushed all thoughts of what he and Justice had discussed aside. He never wanted to think about losing her and strangely he could feel Justice felt the same way. Here in the peace before the storm their lives felt normal. He was just a man sitting next to the woman he loves discussing something they both felt passionately about. It gave him hope for the future.

OoO

For the third time in her life Leigh found herself surrounded by the sounds of people screaming and dying. The smell of burning flesh and garbage filled the air. For a moment she could have sworn she was back at Ostagar with Carver, but she wasn't. She was running beside Aveline also a survivor of Ostagar and their opponent this time was not mindless darkspawn, it was very ruthless Qunari.

"We need to get to the Keep and assemble the guard."

"That is if we survive getting there Aveline. I didn't know there was this many of them here." The two women stopped to catch their breath. Leigh looked around the corner and saw Varric, Fenris and Anders fighting a small group of Qunari. "Well at least we have a little help now. Come on I think they might need our help." Aveline let out a shrill whistle making the large men turn their attention to her. She charged slamming her shield into one and rolled around to stab another. Leigh struck from the shadows, slicing the back of one's knee making him fall before she slit his throat. The air around them crackled and the hair stood up on the back of Leigh's neck right before a spell slammed into them. Through the haze she saw a Saarebas readying another spell only to have it sputter out. A greatsword pierced through his chest before slicing off his head. A hand appeared in front of Leigh's face and she took it. She was not ready for who she saw on the other end of that hand.

"I am Knight Commander Meredith." Leigh could only stare. There were many things she wanted to say to this woman in front of her, most of them were not very nice. "I know you. The name Hawke has been seen on many reports that pass along my desk."

"I'm like a bad copper I keep turning up." Meredith appraised the younger woman who stood before her. Even under her piercing gaze Leigh did not flinch. She kept eye contact even smiled at the Templar.

"So it seems. They have taken most of the nobles to the Keep."

"Then that is where they plan on making their stand. Though I did not take them as being the type to hide behind human shields."

"It does not matter they will not take Kirkwall. Not on my watch." It took all of Leigh's self control not to roll her eyes at the woman.

"We need to move the longer we stand here the more danger everyone is in. I thank you for the save Knight Commander. See you up at the Keep." She had noticed Meredith's eyes pass over Anders. Inside she cursed for not getting him out of there sooner. Leigh took his hand and led him away while the rest of her friends followed. She gave one last look back at the Templar before breaking into a run. "Self righteous, stuck up, no good, rotten bitch!"

"Tell us how you really feel." Leigh could only glare at Varric. Her sense of humor had just flown right out of Kirkwall and she was not sure when it would be back. "What? At least the Queen of Ice saved our hides. Now we just have to make sure to save everyone elses."

"I hate it when you bring logic into everything. I much rather just hate the woman and wish to one day see her head on a pike. Your right though we do have to try and help those people the Qunari have at the Keep."

"Do we have a plan? Or are we just trying not to get ourselves killed." Leigh gave a dark chuckle and slapped her hand on Fenris' back.

"Think the latter Fenris and we should do fine." He rolled his eyes, but smiled. "It looks like they have blocked off some of the routes to Keep we will have to go around. Varric, Anders cover us."

"Aveline and I will clear the way. Hawke clean up if we miss any." Leigh felt Anders hand squeeze hers. She looked up into his eyes and look she saw there mirrored her own. She stood up on her toes and let her lips brush against his before she whispered in his ear.

"We will make it through this. So no bad thoughts okay?"

"I wish I could share your optimism Leigh. I have to say it just in case...I love you."

"Love you too, now cover us." The fighting intensified the closer they got to the Viscount's Keep. The last group they came upon was already in the thick of a fight with some of the mages from the Gallows. "Maker they're getting slaughtered." Out of the corner of her eye Leigh caught sight of her sister battling for her life. Without thinking Leigh charged in that direction. She could hear Varric yell something, but she could not make it out. It did not take her long to realize what he was yelling. She felt the same charge in the air that had happened earlier telling her that one of the Qunari mages was very close. She whipped around and saw him hiding in the corner. "Shit, alright you son of a bitch come and get me." _"Their magic is raw and primal. When I say move, move." "Got it." _Leigh could hear the sounds of battle all around her, but she kept her focus on the Saarebas. _"Move!"_ Leigh rolled to her left and dodged the huge ball of lightning. She planted herself in the shadows hoping to use them to her advantage. The light from a fire ball gave away her hiding place. She cursed knowing she did not have a prayer to dodge this attack. Closing her eyes, waiting for the pain to come she heard a sick wet sound. Opening her one eye she saw Cullen standing behind the now falling form of the mage.

"Are you alright?" Cullen was covered in blood and favoring his left arm. Leigh looked over his shoulder, another Qunari warrior was heading their way. She sidestepped Cullen and threw her dagger, hitting her target right between his eyes.

"I'm fine, but you look like shit. Where are the others?"

"Of the group I brought with me, I'm the only one left."

"Then fight with us." He nodded heading back to what was left of the mages. Bethany ran up to them and wrapped Cullen in a tight embrace. It seemed she had not seen her sister standing there at all.

"You're alright. I thought they had got you." A flash of crimson ran up Cullen's face, trying to break the awkward moment Leigh cleared her throat. "Leigh! Maker, I should have known you would be in the thick of this."

"They did not give me much choice, or should I say Isabela didn't give me a choice."

"Isabela? What does she have to do with this?"

"Long story, let's just say she took something from the Qunari and they are pretty pissed that they can't get it back."

"What a mess. So what is the plan? How do we stop this?" Leigh smiled at her sister. Bethany's time in the Circle had matured her. She was no longer the shrinking violet she use to be.

"We need to get to the Keep and rally Aveline's guards. After that I hope we can try yo talk the Arishok down before more people die on both sides." Bethany left to take to First Enchanter Orsino and Leigh grabbed Cullen's arm. "Can't stay away from Hawke women can you?"

"I..." Leigh held up her hand to silence him.

"As long as she is happy I am happy, but so help me if you hurt her, I will make this look like a skip through the daisies." He gave her a nervous laugh and held up his hands.

"Understood, ah here comes the Knight Commander."

"Just bloody lovely. She is just going to make this worse. We can't go barging in there like a drunken bronto. This is going to take tact, something she lacks."

"I agree. You always had a silver tongue, I say this show should be yours."

"Lucky me."

"Hey Hawke, they're falling back to the Keep." Varric's voice came from where the surviving mages were standing.

"Aveline do you see any of your guards?"

"No, and this is the only way in. We need a plan." Meredith and Orsino began snipping at each other. Leigh listened for a few seconds before stepping between them and raising her hands. Orsino silenced, looking at Bethany who nodded and smiled at her sister. Meredith stared with a slow rage in her eyes.

"You two at each others throats is not helping. I have had dealings with the Qunari so I am leading this. If you are not going to help then get the hell out of my way. We need to be careful, I don't want to lose anyone else."

"Why should we follow you? You were not born here, what do you care if the city falls?"

"Well Meredith, I live here now and my mother hailed form here. I just got my home the way I like it, so I do care if the city falls. Now help or shut up."

"What do you need of us Serah Hawke?" Orsino was enjoying seeing someone stand up to the bane of his existence.

"We need a distraction to get past those guards."

"Then I shall give you one." With a smile Orsino walked out to face the small group of Qunari. He called forth fire and unleashed it against them. The distraction worked as all the guard ran to take out the lone mage. Leigh and her friends slipped past them and into the Keep. Bodies lay everywhere and blood splattered the walls and the floors. They met resistance in the main foyer. The battle was over quickly, though Leigh could tell her friends were tiring. Her muscles felt like lead and she knew they were out of any potions that would be useful. Her eyes fell to Anders who looked exhausted having used his magic just to keep them up on their feet. She hoped Cullen was right and her silver tongue could get them out of this without further bloodshed. Taking a deep breath she pushed open the doors and was not prepared for the greeting she received.

"Here is your Viscount!" The Arishok threw the head of the now late Viscount at the crowd and it landed at Leigh's feet.

"What have you done?"

"Serah Hawke I knew you would come."

"You have destroyed any chance of us ending this peacefully. Why?"

"Without the the Tome we can not return home. For years I have sat back watching as these bas waste their lives. We have been threatened, killed and yet I do nothing. I will not stand by and watch any longer."

"Then I will have to stop you." The Arishok smiled then nodded to his honor guard.

"Then prove yourself or kneel with your people." The five companions made short work of the honor guard. "You truly are basalit an, worthy of following. You know I can not return home without the Tome and I cannot stand by anymore while this city spirals down further. What would you have me do?" The sound of a scuffle caught everyone's attention. Leigh turned to see Isabela saunter in with the Tome in hand.

"I can give you and answer for that." She handed the book back to the Arishok. "You will find it is mostly undamaged."

"We will return home then, with the thief." Isabela baulked, as Leigh pushed the pirate behind her.

"She stays here. You have your Tome back be happy with that."

"We do not suffer thieves either she returns with us or you battle me for her alone, to the death."

"No if you duel anyone you duel me. I'm the one who took your stupid book, I'm the one you should fight not Hawke."

"You are unworthy. What is your decision? Will you fight or will you give her to us?"

"I will fight, but I would like a moment to prepare." He nodded and Leigh went to talk to her friends. "Whatever happens I want you all to get Isabela out of here. If they take her with them she will die and there is no way I am letting that happen." Aveline opened her mouth to speak, but Leigh held up her hand. "I know what she did was wrong Aveline, but it was before we knew her. She is my friend and I do not leave friends behind. Now if you all can give me a minute with Anders please." They left the two lovers alone.

"You can't do this. He will kill you love."

"Do you trust me?"

"Yes, but..." Her finger touched his lips to quiet his protest.

"Then trust me to do this. I have tricks up my sleeves, I know I can beat him." Anders leaned his head against hers, his fear began to build. He felt her fingers thread through his hair right before her lips met his. The kiss was sweet, but had a hint of desperation in it. When it broke Leigh let out a sigh before letting him go. "I will be fine, so don't worry so. I will be back before you know it." He nodded swallowing hard. His mouth was so dry he could not speak. She left his side and went to stand in front of the Arishok. "I am ready."

"Then let us end this once and for all." The fight started in the throne room, both combatants matching each other blow for blow. Leigh had the speed, but the Arishok had the power behind his swings. With a high snap kick she sent him through the doors that led back to the main room. His men closed the doors to ensure no one would interfere in this duel. Having battled most of the day Leigh's body was stiffening up. Her energy was failing her. The Arishok on the other hand was not as battle worn. He pressed this advantage, many times coming close to impaling her on his massive greatsword. He lost sight of her for a few moments when she hit him with a miasma grenade.

"_This is not going well." "Really, I thought it was going great." "Sarcasm is not helping Leigh. You have to end this and soon or you will not survive this." "I know, I know, but he is much faster than I thought he'd be." "He is a powerful adversary, but he does have weaknesses. You must exploit them." "I am trying...shit he found me got to move." _

"You hide like a coward."

"No I was just planning my next move. I never back down from a fight you should know that by now." Leigh ran and vaulted over the railing landing seamlessly on the lower set of stairs. She needed to gain the advantage by having more things around to stop his powerful swings. The cramped courtiers gave her the better maneuverability. "Come and get me." She readied herself for his charge holding her daggers at the parry angle. He swung his ax down with such force she needed both arms to stop it. With both of her daggers busy holding the ax from splitting her in two she had no chance to stop the greatsword that lunged forward into her stomach. Leigh let out a gurgling scream, blood welled up in her throat and she sagged against the Arishoks big frame.

"You were a worthy adversary Serah Hawke. May you find peace in death." He withdrew his blade and Leigh tumbled against the wall. Her hand pressed against her abdomen trying to stop the gush of blood that was coming with every breath she took. With fading vision she could only watch the Arishok head back to the throne room.

"_Get up!" "I...I can't. Lost to much blood. Sorry Pa...Pash you're going to die along with me be...because I wasn't fast enough." "Use your magic and heal yourself." "I am not a healer . It was something my...my dad...he did not have time to teach me. I...I don't know how." "Break the stone on your amulet." "But that would mean..." "I know what it means and I am willing to take the risk. I will not let you die this way. You were protecting a friend." "What if I corrupt you like Anders did Justice?" "I am willing to take that chance. I know more about mortal emotion than he does. Break the stone!"_ Leigh's blood slick fingers fumbled trying to pull the amulet over her head. A horrified gasp made her turn her head to find her sister staring at her wide eyed.

"Leigh, oh Maker, no, no, no." Bethany ran and fell to her knees by her sister. "Just hold on I will heal you. Please Maker give me strength to do this." Bethany did not look at the wound for fear she would lose her concentration. Her hands glowed bright green, but the wound was so severe that it was not closing fast enough. "Leigh where is Anders? I can't stop this by myself I am not skilled enough."

"He...he is in there. You can't go in...they will ki...kill you. Get my...amulet, break the stone."

"Your not making any sense."

"It...it's the only way to help m...me. Please, Beth..." Leigh's breathing became more labored and shallow. "I...ca...can't let her die."

"Let who die? Leigh? Leigh!" Leigh slumped over and her breathing stopped. Bethany cut the leather tong that held the amulet and smashed the red gem stone against the mortar wall. She pressed the stone into her sister's hand and waited. She did not see Cullen come in behind her. She jumped when his hands touched her shoulders. "She's gone." Bethany's body shook as she stood up clutching her staff firmly in her hands. "I will make those horned bastards pay. Stay with her Cullen."

"Bethany you'll need my help. You saw what they can do. Your a strong mage, but not that strong."

"Your right. I wasn't strong enough to save my sister, but I know I can burn them to ash before they lay a finger on me. Stay here, please. I owe Leigh this much. She gave up most of her life to keep me safe and I could not return the favor. I will not fail in this." The look on her face told Cullen not to argue. He could only watch as she stormed toward the throne room. His eyes moved to the still form of his first love and tears started to slip down his cheeks.

"Maker take you into his arms Leigh. You deserved better than this." A bright red light over took the room, blinding Cullen and sending him reeling to the far wall. The last thing he saw was a shadow standing in front of the light before he fell unconscious. 


	12. Chapter 12

Anders could only stare at the doorway he had seen Leigh go through what seemed like ages before. The longer she was gone the more his blood ran cold. Justice squirmed impatiently wanting nothing more than to be set loose on the Qunari. When the Arishok walked through the door and not Leigh, Anders fell to his knees. He could see the blood still dripping from the greatsword, knowing full well it was her blood. He did not look at the others for fear they would confirm his worst fear. Leigh was gone. He could hear Justice scream in his head. It was a scream of pain that echoed his own.

"Your champion is dead. Bring the thief we are leaving." The other Qunari nodded and went to grab Isabela. She drew her daggers taking a defensive position.

"You horned son of a bitch, I will gut you for what you have done." Her words came out like venom. The pain and hatred on her face was plain to see.

"You were the one who brought this upon her thief. It was your doing." Hot fat tears streamed from the pirate's eyes. She knew he was right. She did this to Leigh and there was no way to make it right. The daggers clanged on the floor, Isabela had no desire to fight. Her grief was too much, the Qunari who took her into custody had to half drag her. Before the Arishok was able to reach the door it blew in. Shattered pieces of wood and stone rained in on the stunned crowd. Bethany stood in the doorway with her staff leveled at the Arishok.

"I am going to kill you for what you did to my sister." Her voice was raw with rage. "She did not deserve this. She has never done anything, but help people and you kill her."

"You are not worthy to fight saarebas step aside now."

"You will fight me or die where you stand. I am not afraid of you." The Arishok drew his weapons and charged Bethany. She did not have time to react when the smoke bomb went off right in front of her and hands moved her out of the doorway. The crowd watched the Arishok disappear into the smoke only to fly right back out of it. Blood arced from his nose as he fell onto his back. He quickly scrambled to his feet weapons ready.

"I wasn't done with you yet." Anders head snapped up as did the others. Out of the smoke a very battered, but very much alive Leigh stalked out. "When you duel to the death you better make sure the person is truly dead before you claim victory." For the first time they all could see a look of fear in the Qunari. The Arishok himself looked to be in shock.

"Im...Impossible, I killed you."

"Yet here I am walking and talking." She gave the large man a feral grin and waved her hand to egg him on. "Come on coward fight me." The fear was now gone in the Arishok replaced by rage. He charged again, but this time Leigh was ready she flipped over his head and grabbed both of his horns. Her momentum slammed him back to the ground with a bone jarring crash. She somersaulted to her feet drawing both her blades. The Arishok got to his feet slowly, shaking his head to try to clear it.

"You are full of surprises human, but it is time to end this."

"I couldn't agree more." Leigh stood her ground this time when he swung at her. Again she had to use both daggers to stave off the blow from his ax, but this time she was able to maneuver herself in such a way that his attack with his sword was useless. Leigh lashed out kicking him in the knee. The sicking pop it made echoed through the throne room, as did his scream of pain. Knocking the ax out of his one hand, she brought her left dagger down across his chest. Hot blood splashed on her leather armor, but she paid it no mind as he tried to swing his greatsword at her. Leigh parried it, sending it flying into the near by wall. The wound she had given him was sapping his strength. The Arishok picked up his ax, but could not get to his feet. Leigh attacked again blocking his swing and burying her dagger deep into his chest. Blood started flowing out of his mouth, just as it had done hers when he had tried to kill her. With a flick of her wrist she twisted the dagger in deeper causing him to fall back onto the floor. "You should have just taken the bloody book and left. I did not want this."

"We will return one day..." His eyes rolled back into his head before he took his last breath. Leigh turned her attention to the Qunari that held Isabela. She took a threatening stance and they released the pirate.

"Take your Tome and leave now." The Qunari nodded and sank into the shadows. The nobles who had been standing there silently erupted into applause and yells of appreciation. Leigh sank to the floor breathing a sigh of relief. Bethany was the first to reach her. She crushed her older sister with a hug.

"Your alright, I thought you were dead."

"I would have been if you hadn't come in when you did. Your healing skills are better than you thought."

"Wait where is Cullen? I asked him to stay with you while I...there was no way for me to win against him was there?" Bethany looked back at the body of the Arishok and shivered.

"Cullen is out there. I think one of their fighters knocked him out because I found him out cold when I woke." Bethany got to her feet and ran out to find the Templar. She returned a few moments later with Cullen. His arm was draped over her shoulder as she helped him to a seat. Anders in the meantime wrapped his arms around Leigh crushing her against him.

"Are you hurt anywhere other than your head?" Bethany began healing the gash on the back of his head.

"No, I didn't see who hit me. I just remember a bright flash of red then a shadow before losing conciseness." He looked up and saw Leigh standing behind her sister and his bottom jaw almost fell to the floor. "Leigh! But you were...I thought you...thank the Maker your alive."

"I have Bethany to thank for that." From behind them Leigh heard armor clacking. She turned and saw Meredith and Orsino come in followed by a hand full of Templars. Meredith looked around and was struck speechless for a few seconds. Her eyes fell on Leigh who had a triumphant look on her face.

"Is...is it over?"

"It is over. The rest of the Qunari are leaving for good. Kirkwall is safe for now, but the Viscount is dead." The nobles began to murmur. Leigh could hear some of them calling for her to take up the office of the Viscount.

"It looks like Kirkwall has a new champion." The Knight Commander turned on her heels and started to walk out of the throne room. She stopped and looked at Bethany healing Cullen. "Knight Captain when you are on your feet again please escort the First Enchanter and his student back to the Gallows. I have to make sure the rest of the city is secure."

"Yes, Knight Commander." When Meredith and the nobles were all out of the throne room Leigh collapsed on the floor. Her adrenaline had worn off.

"Love, are you alright? Are you hurt?" Anders hands touched her face and she felt his healing magic running through her. He frowned and turned his attention to her side. The wound was half way healed, but still needed much healing.

"I am just exhausted. I lost a lot of blood before Bethany healed me."

"I need to get you home. A few days of rest and food will help." Leigh cupped his chin before planting a soft kiss on his lips,

"I'm sorry I worried you."

"Just don't do it again, even Justice was upset." She gave him a weak smile and leaned into his chest. Bethany and Cullen came over to where they were. Bethany's mind was reeling. She still could not figure out how Leigh was still alive. She knew it wasn't from her magic, not completely anyway.

"What was in that amulet?" Leigh turned her head up slowly and met her sister's eyes.

"It was a spell from Papa. A very powerful restoration spell." Anders looked down at his lover with a raised eyebrow.

"I've heard of enchanted amulets, but never anything like that. How did he manage that?"

"Your asking the wrong person. I know nothing of magic remember."

"Where is the amulet now?" Leigh dug the disk out of her side pocket and handed it to him. The magic it once held was waning. "_Justice can you tell what spell it might have been?" "It is as she said, a restoration spell. She is very lucky." "I am the lucky one. If she had died...I don't even want to think about it." "She is here and well take solace in that." "I am believe me."_

"Well what is the verdict?" Anders just shook his head and let out a light chuckle.

"I wish I could have learned from your father. He was quite a healer."

"Yes he was." Leigh felt Bethany's hand on her shoulder. The sisters shared a look before one of them spoke.

"If you ever do that to me again Leigh I swear I will heal you just to kill you myself."

"I have no plans on throwing myself on any blades anytime soon." Anders and Fenris helped Leigh to her feet and supported her weight between the two of them. Varric joined them after he finished calming Isabela down. Aveline had left them to talk to her guard and find Donnic. Bethany hugged her sister tightly then went with Cullen and Orsino.

"Let's get you home, love. You need to rest." With eyes half closed Leigh nodded. The last of her energy was spent. She felt someone sweep her up and carry her, but anything after that she was oblivious to as sleep took hold of her. "_Thank you Pash and I am sorry you are now trapped here." "You are welcome. I do not see myself as trapped. I see it as a learning experience. I can learn much from you and you can learn from me. We both need rest. Sleep and give you body a chance to completely heal." _Anders heard her mumble something while he carried her back home. He chalked it up to her being over tired. Once he got her out of her armor and into bed he went back to the others waiting in the sitting room of the estate.

"How is she?" Isabela's voice was shaky and full of remorse. She did not even look up so she would not have to look Anders in the eyes.

"She will be fine. She just needs rest. I am going to stay up with her for a bit, but I am also exhausted. Could I count on all of you to take turns watching over her when I sleep?"

"Sure thing Blondie. I will go get Merrill and Sebastian to help also. Broody and Rivani will stay with you til I get back."

"Thank you Varric. Isabela could you try to track down Bohdan, Sandal and Orana?"

"On it." Without another word the pirate disappeared out the door. Anders turned to Fenris who had been very quiet since they entered the Viscount's Keep.

"I need to go to the clinic and get some supplies. Would you sit with her til I return?"

"Of course." Anders left through the cellar while Fenris went to their room. He quietly pulled up a chair and sat beside the bed. His hand wrapped around hers making her stir a little. Fenris kept his voice a barest whisper so as not to wake her. He prayed, thanking the Maker and who ever else would listen for her still being alive. He did not notice Anders standing in the door way watching. The mage decided to let Fenris have his time and went back to the study. He sat down at his desk and let his head rest on his arms. The tears he had held back for most of the night came unbidden. He was not sure how long he had been sitting there before he felt a nudge at this side. He looked over and saw Tovis staring at him. The hound cocked his head to the side and let out a faint whimper. In the dogs eyes Anders saw pain and worry.

"I feel the same way boy, but she is still here with us." Before he realized what he was doing Anders hand went out and started scratching Tovis behind the ear. The hound leaned into his fingers and gave a content whine. "I guess this means you are starting to like me." The answer came in the form of Tovis jumping up and licking his face. Anders held his hands up and gently pushed the dog away. "Alright, alright I like you too. Just don't get any ideas of being let back into the bed. Sandal would miss you." As if right on cue Anders heard the main door open and Sandal's call for the dog. Tovis padded off to play with his friend leaving Anders alone again. He took the opportunity to get some rest. The day had taken it's toll on him both physically and emotionally. He let sleep take him hoping to forget the nightmare of almost losing the woman he loves.

OoO

Leigh slept for the better part of three days. She got up to eat and to see her friends who came to see how she was doing, but most of the time she had no energy. Anders spent most of those three days hovering by her side, making sure her wound was healing properly. The inside damage was all but healed, but she had a nasty scar that still looked angry. On the afternoon of the third day she heard raised voices down in the main room. Stiffly she got out of bed and went to her door to listen.

"You do not deserve her." She heard the familiar lilt of Sebastian, but he sounded angry.

"And I suppose you do?" Leigh quietly opened her door and crept to the banister. She saw Anders standing with his arms folded over his chest glaring at the prince.

"At least she would not have to worry about meeting the hangman's noose. You will get her killed."

"I wonder something Sebastian, are you more upset she chose me over you or is it because I at least stand up for my convictions while you hide behind the Grand Cleric's skirt?" With a loud growl Sebastian grabbed Anders and slammed him against the wall. A flash of brown barreled in the prince latching on to his arm. Tovis did not take kindly to anyone hurting his mistress's companion. He clamped down hard on Sebastian's arm making the prince cry out in pain. "Guess he doesn't like you either." Anders sneered.

"Tovis release, now!" Leigh stood half way up the stairs and had a look of anger on her face. Tovis let go of Sebastian and slunk away back towards Anders. "What in the name of the Maker is going on?" Slowly she made her way down the stairs all the time her body ached.

"Nothing we were having a discussion and it got a little heated. You should not be out of bed Leigh."

"Bullshit, let's try this again. Why did you slam Anders into the wall?" Her eyes burned into Sebastian waiting for his response.

"I...I over stepped my bounds. I apologize ser mage. I let my temper get the better of me."

"Apology excepted. I did not help matters any." Leigh noticed the blood dripping from the prince's forearm. She gently took his hand and looked it over.

"Let me go get something to wash this out with so Anders can heal it. Can I leave you two for a moment with having to worry about coming back and finding you two at each others throats again?"

"I can go get it love you should not be moving around too much."

"I am tired of laying around. It is just in the kitchen I will be fine now stay put and behave or so help me I will beat you both to death." Both men nodded not wanting to anger her further. She went to the kitchen for her tincture of witch hazel to clean the wound. She put a pot on the fire to warm up some water to help with the washing off the bite. As she waited her anger still boiled. "I swear they act like roosters strutting and pecking. I will never, ever understand men." She rummaged in one of the cabinets for some clean linens to use, once she found them Leigh turned her attention back to the pot over the fire. Her ire still did not subside as fast as she would have liked it to. The more she thought of it the more she wanted to go back out and give the prince a piece of her mind. She closed her eyes and tried to calm her rage, but it would not cool. A dull roar made her eyes snap open. The sight in front of her made her scream as a rage demon slide it's way to her.

"I can feel your anger mortal. It is delicious." The demon blocked Leigh's only exit out of the kitchen.

"Get away from me demon!" It snarled at her and kept moving forward. A freeze spell hit the demon from behind as Anders and Sebastian burst through the door. The demon made one final swipe at her leaving a long set of burn marks on her arm. Sebastian held his shot for fear he would hit Leigh.

"Hawke, you have to get out of there I can't take a shot."

"I can't he has me blocked in." Her arm stung and her other wound did not allow her to evade the demon. It loomed over her not wanting to give up it's prey. "Anders help!" The fear in her voice brought Justice to the forefront. The blue glow clashed with the red aura of the demon.

"You will not have her demon. I will send you back to the Void." The demon turned it's attention to Justice and gave Leigh enough room to run. Sebastian took his shot just as she was able to reach his side. Between the two men they made short work of the demon. Justice turned back to them and started to walk forward. The prince leveled his bow at him. He had never been privy to seeing Justice, he always thought it had been a joke about Anders because of his dedication to mage freedom. Now he could see it was very real. Everything he had learned being a brother in the Chantry told him this was no different than a demon possession and he would not let this thing near Leigh.

"You will come no closer abomination."

"Sebastian, he is not an abomination. Please don't do this." Leigh struggled to get to to her feet. She hissed at the pain in her side.

"He is no different than that creature who attacked you. I will not wait around to see him turn on you."

"He will not turn on me now lower your bow." Justice held his hand out readying a spell. Leigh slide between the two and held out her hands to both. "I will not let the two of you kill each other." Tears began to well up in her eyes. "I have lost enough dammit, do not do this to me." Sebastian looked pained as he lowered his bow. Justice followed suit and put his hand down.

"I...I will leave. You know where to find me Hawke if you need me."

"What about your arm? You can't leave it like that."

"I will have one of the lay healers take a look at it." He bowed and slipped out of the kitchen leaving her alone with Justice. She fell to her knees trembling and crying. The blue glow got closer as Justice knelt next to her. His arm gingerly wrapped around her pulling her closer.

"I am sorry." His voice was soft, it took her by surprise. "We never meant for it to be like this."

"I know. They don't understand and I am not sure they ever will. I'm not afraid of you Justice. They don't see what I see. I see a good man in front of me and a benevolent spirit. The Chantry did this to him , made him hate with such conviction that it effected you too. I hold no love for what is done to mages. I stopped believing in the Chantry when the Templars hurt my father." Leigh shifted herself and hissed. The blue glow faded and the amber eyes she loved so much returned.

"Let's get you out of here so I can heal those wounds." She nodded and let him help her to her feet. She tried to walk, but ended up stumbling into him. As gently as he could he swept her up in his arms and took her back to their room. His hands glowed as he called forth his healing magic. Tending to the burns first then her older wound. "Your side is almost healed. Just a few more days of rest and I think you should be able to start kicking ass again."

"Watch out Kirkwall here I come." She laughed a little then her face turned serious. "If you two had not come into the room when you did..."

"I would like to know how in the Void that thing got into the house? Did Merrill do something and it just decided to linger til it found easy prey or is there something much darker working against you?"

"I know Merrill would never do anything to call a demon into our home. Maybe it was conjured by a blood mage I have gotten on the bad side of." She shivered at the thought.

"Most likely. You should rest I will check in on you in a bit." Her hand shot out and grasped his.

"You know you can stay and keep me company now that it is just us."

"Til the next one of your friends comes in and tells me I am not worthy of you."

"Please tell me you don't believe that." The look on his face told her he did. She let out a ragged sigh and pulled him down to sit next to her on the bed. "Why do you think you are not worthy of me?"

"Because of what I am. I can never give you a normal life. You should be able to live without looking over your shoulder all the time. With me you could get hurt or worse if I was ever caught. I love you too much to let that happen."

"I have looked over my shoulder all my life Anders. I know no other way of life. I have just as many enemies as you do and not all of them are Templars. You want to know the reason I love you as much as I do? It is because I see the good that you do. You heal the poor and forgotten, you risk your life to save other mages from the Templars. You do all this good and yet you will not allow yourself to have something of your own. Aside from my father you are the most amazing man I have ever had the privilege to know. If that does not make you worthy than I do not know what will."

"Maker you must think I am a fool."

"No, I just think you are trying to be chivalrous, but I am not looking for a knight in shining armor. Had one of those before and it ended very badly remember. I want you. You may not be perfect, but you are prefect for me." Her fingers curled up under his chin turning him to face her. "I wish you could see yourself as I see you."

"And what do you see?"

"I see someone worth loving." She leaned forward without breaking eye contact. "I will never think you are not worth it, ever."

"Even if I do something to break your heart?"

"Even then. I will stand by your side til my dying day."

"That day almost happened. Promise me you will not go off and do that again."

"I swear I will never duel an Arishok again by myself." He gave her an annoyed look making her hold up her hands in surrender. "Alright, please don't look at me like that." The sides of his mouth turned upwards and she began to laugh.

"I love you, even though you drive me insane sometimes." He stood up and went to the door.

"Where are you going?"

"Nowhere, just shutting and locking the door." She watched as he shrugged out of his coat and kicked off his boots. "Now my love you need to lay back down and get some sleep."

"I'll be able to now that your staying in here with me. I find I can't sleep when your not in the bed with me."

"Funny thing is I can't either." He held out his hand and helped her up so she could get changed into her night clothes while he turned down the covers. Once they were both settled under the covers Leigh let herself drift off to sleep. She felt Pash stir in the back of her mind. She had been quiet for the past few days.

"_I am almost afraid to ask this question, but it was me that brought that demon here wasn't it?" "Yes, I am afraid so. Your anger at Sebastian summoned it." "How do I stop it from happening again?" "You need to find a teacher to instruct you how to control your magic. Your connection to the Fade is strong and you must learn to guard yourself now. My powers can no longer bind your own since we are now of one body. You must tell him what you are Leigh. He can help you through this." "What am I suppose to say, oh by the way I am a mage who had her powers bound by a spirit that now shares my body? He will have kittens." "I don't think that is a possibility. He is human and a man. I know enough about mortals to know that much." "It was a sarcastic remark Pash. I need to learn to control this first before I tell him. He is worried about me being in danger enough without this." "Then who will teach you if not him?" "I could ask Merrill to help me." "I do not think it is wise to have the blood mage teach you. She can barely control her own powers let alone teach you to control yours." "I trust her Pash. She can help me." "The choice is yours, but I still say you should tell him and let him help you." "When I am healed I will go to Merrill if she can't help me then I will tell him."_

"Love your talking in your sleep." Leigh opened her eyes and found him staring at her with a look of concern.

"What was I saying?"

"It was mostly mumbles I could not make it out, but you never did it before."

"I keep seeing the fight with the Arishok in my dreams. It..."

"I think I understand. He is dead Leigh and you are here safe with me."

"I know, but all the death he caused. I can still see the Viscount's face."

"Shh, I'm here." She hated lying to him, but she was not ready to tell him everything yet. Truth was it wasn't completely a lie. She did see the faces of the dead when she closed her eyes, she could even still feel the blade as it went through her body. She gave a involuntary shiver and a few seconds later she felt him use a warming spell. Leigh tilted her head up just as his lips brushed against her forehead. With a content sigh she laid her head back down on his chest letting his heartbeat lull her back to sleep.


	13. Chapter 13

"Would you please stop fidgeting?" Anders gave Leigh a stern look, but it was offset by the fact he was smiling.

"I can't help it. I am going stir crazy being laid up in bed yet again. Maker I swear this is done to me on purpose."

"I know love, but I am not letting you go out and do anything without making sure that wound is healed. It is a miracle all your organs are still in one piece."

"I just want to go and visit Merrill. How much trouble can I get into doing that?"

"Knowing you a lot." Her hand shot up and gently smacked his arm. "Hey, there is no need to smack me, especially when I am telling the truth." She let out a huff and tried to stay still for him. The longer she stayed coped up in her home the more chance there was of another demon coming to call or worse her powers flaring causing her to hurt someone. She had only ever used them in the Fade at full strength and only hand full of times in the real world. Those times she was damn lucky that it did not backfire on her. Anders hands swept over her now healed over wound in her abdomen, even the scar looked like it was fading away. He could not help but glance at her and see her lips were puckered out in a pout. Inside he laughed seeing her look like a small child that was not getting her way. "Well it looks like you are all healed my love."

"Well that is because I was in good hands all this time." Her smile had returned and the pout she had been wearing was all, but a memory.

"Please tell me you are going to behave yourself and not run into anymore swords."

"I will behave. I am just going to see Merrill and you my dear have to go make sure you have no patients waiting for you down at the clinic while you have been up here playing nurse maid for me."

"I know, but...I nearly lost you Leigh. Can't I be the least bit cautious about letting you out of my sight?" Leigh stood up and wrapped her arms around his waist.

"Yes you can, but you can't keep me safe all the time. I am like you, I hate to be locked up even by you." Anders shook his head and chuckled at her.

"Using my own words against me are you?"

"Maybe."

"I hopefully will be back before sunset if I am lucky. Varric said once you were well enough he wanted all of us to meet at the Hanged Man to celebrate the Champion of Kirkwall."

"Then we will not disappoint. I will come back here and get you after sunset." They said their goodbyes and Leigh headed to the Chantry. She felt she had to check on Sebastian, since it was her hound that bit him regardless of why. She also wanted to clear the air about why he attacked Anders in the first place. Sebastian was normally very gentlemanly, but the look on his face when he slammed the mage into the wall was anything but. She valued the prince as a friend and confidant. He had helped her through the lost of her sister and her mother. The last thing Leigh wanted was to lose him because she chose someone else to be with. As she walked up the stairs she saw a line had formed outside the doors. "Confession day. Great this is going to take a while." She waited in the shadows til she saw the last of the faithful go in. Once she was certain it was clear she went into the Chantry. "Excuse me, could you tell me where I could find Brother Sebastian?"

"He is up talking to the Grand Cleric. You can go right up Champion." The young lay sister bowed to her, it made Leigh a little bit uncomfortable. She did not feel like she was above anyone even being a noble. She could hear Sebastian's raised voice coming from above her.

"I do not do this blindly Your Grace. I want to reaffirm my vows. Let my cousin rule, I do not have the stomach for dealing with the backstabbing nobles and..."

"You have done this before Sebastian. Those vows are not to be made then thrown away on a whim."

"I...yes, Your Grace."

"Ah here is your friend Hawke. Maybe she can talk some sense into you." The Grand Cleric threw her hands up in frustration and took her leave.

"She seemed frustrated with you. What did you do?" Leigh kept her voice friendly and soft.

"She thinks I am being foolish for giving up my claim to Starkhaven's throne."

"Can I say I agree with her? Your country needs you."

"What would you have me do Hawke? I made vows to serve the Maker and his bride. Am I to throw them away so easily just to take what was never to be mine to begin with?"

"Your people will suffer under your cousin's rule. I have heard some nasty things about the man and this was even before I became a noble. Maybe you were never suppose to be the one to rule, but you are now. And correct me if I am wrong, but I thought you were free from your vows."

"I was, but I am going to take them again."

"Please tell me this has nothing to do with me." When he did not look at her she knew it did. "Oh for the love of...why? What makes me so bloody desirable?"

"Hawke I..." Leigh threw her hands in the air just as Elthina did moments earlier and started to walk away. Sebastian's hand caught hers before she made it to the stairs. "Please let me explain, just not here."

"Where pray tell would you like to discuss this?" He led her to what looked like a small dormitory room. "Is this your room?"

"Yes, since I am one of the few men who lives here so I am lucky enough to have my own room."

"I never knew they were so bare and plain."

"We take a vow of, poverty, chastity, and faith. The Maker gives us all we need."

"A simple life." He smiled and nodded. "So are you ready to explain to me why?"

"I did not want to fall for you Hawke, it just happened. When you came to me and told me that you had taken care of Flint Company I was blown away. Here was this beautiful woman who avenged the killers of my family. Then you went with me to confront Lady Harimann and talked me down afterward. The grace you show to everyone is something to be seen. You treat all of us like family. How could I not want to be with a woman like you?"

"I am nothing special Sebastian. I was a dirt poor refugee from Ferelden. My father was an apostate as is my sister. I have nothing to offer someone like you."

"But you can offer something to Anders?"

"That is none of your business. I love him, he loves me that's all I need."

"What he is will get you killed one day and I don't want to see that. I care about you too much."

"Sebastian...I'm sorry I can't be what you want, but I don't want to lose you as a friend. You have been here for me through some of the worst times in my life. I can never repay you for what you have done for me."

"You never have to. I did it because I care for you not to have something over your head."

"I know." Leigh took his hands and squeezed them. Before she knew what was happening his lips were crushing hers. She felt his arms wrap around her back as he pulled her against him. He smelled like incense, leather and wood. The scent filled her senses and her body relaxed into his. Somewhere in her head she suddenly realized he was not in his armor. The cut of his muscles could be felt under his soft linen shirt, it made Leigh shutter. Sebastian deepened the kiss and ran his hands along her stomach. Anders face flashed in her mind and she pushed Sebastian back. "I can't do this."

"Forgive me, I never should have...I know you love him, but...Maker, please forgive me."

"There is nothing to forgive. This never happened."

"It never happened." The look on his face broke her heart. He looked like she had just ripped open his chest and danced on his heart. Part of her wanted to hug him, but she was not sure she would be able to stop him if he kissed her again. She wasn't sure if she would want to. She could not say the thought had not crossed her mind when she first met him, but his vows and her attraction to Anders made it impossible. Every woman wants a prince to sweep them off their feet at least one time in their lives. Leigh was no different hence why she was drawn to Cullen years ago.

"I better go." She backed her way to the door with her hands up. Before she left the room she tried to think of something to say. "Sebastian if things had been different, I would have chosen you. I know it does not help the matter at all. You are a good man and your people would be very lucky to have you. If you need me you always know where I am. I will always be here for you, but I can't be with you the way you want me to." She ran before he could speak and headed for Lowtown. She wanted nothing more than to forget what had just happened. In the back of her head she could hear Pash, but she ignored it. She did not want to think about what had just happened for fear she would turn around and make the biggest mistake of her life.

OoO

"Merrill are you home?"

"Back here Hawke. I am working on the eluvian." Leigh stopped in the doorway and leaned against the door jam. Merrill finished what she was doing and put a drape back over the mirror. "Let me clean off a space for you to sit. I am so happy you are alright after the fight with the Qunari."

"I am doing well as far as Anders has told me. I was lucky."

"How are things with Anders? I heard he lives with you now. Are you two getting married or is it just a physical thing?" Leigh nearly spit out the water Merrill had offered her, instead she choked on a bit of it. Merrill jumped up from her chair and went to help Leigh. "Oh I'm sorry did I say something wrong again. I am still don't know how to act around people."

"It's...it's okay Merrill. I love him and I want to spend the rest of my life with him, but the Chantry will never allow us to marry. He is a mage and it is against Chanrty law for them to marry."

"I am so glad he finally stopped being stupid and told you he loves you. He seems so much happier now. It is a nice change from him being grumpy."

"It is nice to see him smile more than he has since I've known him."

"I'm sorry I didn't visit when you were hurt. I have been so consumed with trying to fix the eluvian that I have lost track of what day it is."

"Well is there any way I could pry you from it for a while? I need your help with something."

"I do need a break. What is the mission?"

"No mission I...I need you help with something else."

"What is it?" Leigh held out her hand and called forth a fire ball. Merrill's eyes went wide and she backed away.

"I need you help to learn to control my magic." The fire ball died when she closed her hand and she waited for Merrill to calm down.

"By the Creators, but your not a mage how...why...are you possessed?" Leigh gave a dark laugh and stood up.

"Sort of. It is not a demon though so please don't look at me like that. If you let me I will explain." Merrill sat back down and listened as Leigh told her everything. To her credit the elf stayed calm through the whole explanation. "So that is it, I was born a mage and now I need your help. I have never learned to control my powers outside of the Fade and I already unknowingly brought a demon from the Fade into my home."

"What type?"

"A rage demon. I was angry about something that had happened and it attacked me. Thankfully Anders and Sebastian made short work of it. I don't trust myself and I don't want to worry Anders anymore that he already is. I trust you Merrill, will you help me?"

"I'm no teacher. I would have made a horrible Keeper, I am not sure how much help I would be to you. Hawke you would be better off learning from Anders."

"That is what Pash said too, but he is always on edge and I afraid this might send him over it."

"Who is Pash?"

"She is the spirit. I could not say Compassion when I was a child so I called her Pash. She said it is endearing."

"Is she nicer than Justice?"

"So far yes she is. She is better with human emotions than Justice is." Merrill's face showed signs of relief. She had seen Justice just once and he had threatened her. If Leigh had not been with them to talk him down, Merrill had a sneaking suspicion that she would have been hurt or worse by Justice.

"Well that is good. I could show you how to do a few spells. Most of mine are primal spells and some elemental."

"That's good because I think that is the type of mage I am. I was very good with fire, ice and stone in the Fade."

"Well the day is still young we can go and see what you can do."

"Let's go." It took over an hour for them to get to Merrill's secluded practice hideaway. Leigh could see scorch marks and bits of stone that had been blow apart by the stonefist spell. "You have been busy."

"Fighting along side all of you has made me practice controlling my spells better. Remember when I almost set Fenris on fire, well I don't want to do that again. What would you like to start with first?"

"I need to understand the basics mostly. I was always good with fire so I know how to call it, but my emotions seem to send my magic into fits. I need to rein it in."

"Then we should start by getting you to feel the emotions that set your magic out of control. Anger is always a good one. Rage demons are the weakest so let's start there." Finding things to make Leigh angry were not hard. She dredged up things from her past that outraged her. The first that came to mind was the Templars who hurt her father. Merrill watched from a safe distance just in case something went wrong. Leigh struggled to control a fireball and it ended up sputtering out on her.

"How do you do this? Maker this is hard."

"It is just like when you learned to fight with daggers, it takes practice and patience. You are new to this it will take time." Leigh stared at her hand and tried to call back the fireball, but it would not light. She took a deep breath and tried again, this time it ignited and held. "Now toss it between your hands and try keep it the same size."

"Like this?" She tossed it back and forth before flipping it in the air and catching it behind her back. Merrill began to laugh.

"Yes that will do. Are you sure you have never used your magic before?"

"I have, but only a few times. The last time was to help a wayward apostate that happened to wander into Lothering." A small secret smile came up on Leigh's lips. "I stopped the Templars from hurting him by hanging them from the tree in the woods, naked."

"Naked?"

"I didn't hurt anything, but their pride. The mage and I laughed for over an hour over it." Merrill tittered and Leigh let out a rolling laugh. "I haven't thought of that in years."

"You look a little sad."

"Not really, I was happy to help him escape, but there was a part of me that wanted to go with him. He was charismatic and handsome. He knew so much more about the world than I did."

"You sound wistful when you talk about him." Merrill came and sat beside her on the boulder Leigh had perched herself on. "He sounds like he was special to you."

"He was. I know I was just a stop in the road for him, but he marked my life. I will always remember him."

"What would you do if you saw him again?"

"I would hope to find him well and free. I was so young when I met him. I have learned a lot since then and I am with Anders now. I would not give up my life with him for anything in Thedas or anyone."

"I know it is none of my business, but was that mage your first?" The crimson flush ran right up to the very tips of Merrill's ears after she asked that question. "What I meant to say was he...by the dread wolf you can stop me anytime now." Leigh just laughed and waved Merrill's embarrassment off.

"It is fine Merrill I don't mind talking about it. I am not ashamed of my past. Was he my first, yes he was. What can I say I have a thing for blonde haired, brown eyed runaway apostates." A thoughtful look played on Leigh's face as her memories of the man resurfaced. Merrill hated to bring her friend back to the present, but the day was ending. Being on the coast was not good after dark.

"The sun is going down Hawke. We should get back." The rogue sighed and got to her feet

"Yes we should. Thank you Merrill for helping me. I just want to learn enough to control it then I promise I will tell Anders. If it is alright with you we can try to meet here away from the others til I get more comfortable with my powers. I am not ready for the world to know what I am yet. If the Knight Commander finds out it will not end well. I want the woman gone not dead."

"I am the only one who knows?"

"Yes, I have never told anyone. Not even my mother." Merrill jumped up and hugged Leigh tight.

"I have never had anyone trust me like this before."

"Merrill I trust you with my life. You are my friend and one of the kindest people I know aside from Bethany."

"You don't know how much that means to me Hawke. You have always treated me kindly and supported me even when everyone has told you not to. I will never forget this lethallan."

"Lethallan?"

"It means cousin or kin. That is how I see you, like a sister. All of you are my family now."

"You are my family. I would never have been able to make it this far without all of you." Leigh threw her arm over Merrill's shoulder and the two women began to head back to Kirkwall. After the hour walk back she left Merrill with Varric at the Hanged Man. "I have to go home and get Anders. I should be back within the hour."

"We will start without you two then. Almost everyone else is here, save Choir Boy. He said he had something else to do."

"Oh, I guess it is just as well. He doesn't drink anyway."

"Neither does Blondie, but that is his loss."

"You know why he can't, Justice won't let him."

"That spirit is such a killjoy. Go and get your man Hawke. We will try not to get too drunk before you get back."

OoO

"Love are you home?" The Hawke estate was eerily quiet. "Anders?"

"Up here." Leigh ran up the stairs and went into their room. She stopped dead when she saw him. The dark circles under his eyes made him look decades older.

"You look so tired. Are you alright?"

"I had a boy come in that was mangled in the mines...he didn't make it. I wasn't strong enough." She could see the tears in his eyes and she hugged him to her.

"It is not your fault. There is only so much magic can do."

"It does not make it any less tragic. He should have never been in those damned mines in the first place."

"Aveline and I are planning to write to the powers that be in Ferelden and see if we can get some of our people home."

"One can only hope they will come for them. I never thought I would even miss Ferelden. I hated it there and now there is a part of me that wished I had never left. Though if I hadn't left I never would have found you and I can't imagine my life without you."

"I know how hard it had been for you here, but I am glad you came to Kirkwall. Are you up to going to the Hanged Man for drinks and cards?"

"I could use a break from this. Justice has been very quiet so maybe I will be able to have a few mugs of ale. I probably lost my tolerance, so I will pass out after half a one."

"You better not pass out on me. I won't be able to carry you home and I don't want to stay at the tavern for the night."

"Aw, don't you want to be near the dregs of Lowtown?"

"No, but I don't mind being near a mage from Darktown." Her fingers played with the feathers on his coat. "Very near." Her lips brushed his chin inciting him to dip his head down so his lips could meet hers. She pushed all thought of Sebastian from her mind.

"If we don't go now, I doubt we will make it at all. I am very tempted to carry you up stairs and ravage you."

"We could do that, but then Varric will come looking for us." He opened his mouth in rebuttal, but her hand came up to silence him. "We both know he will." Anders leaned his head against her shoulder and sighed. His breath tickled her skin. "We can go get nice and tipsy, then we come back here and..." She whispered in his ear and his face perked up. Leigh had a sly smirk on her face as he stared at her hungrily.

"Minx! How am I to concentrate about anything else now?"

"That was the point love, that was the point."

**I want to thank everyone that has been reading this and sticking with me so far. To all those who have added me to their alert and favorite list you have my deepest thanks. It has been years since I sat down and wrote any kind of fan fiction or story of my own making. It feels good to be doing this again. I also have to thank Bioware for making a world so rip with possibilities for fan writers. They might own all rights to it, but we get to play around in the world they created. Again thank you for reading and I hope you continue to enjoy.**

**Raven **


	14. Chapter 14

_Leigh woke to find she could not move. Her head throbbed and her vision was blurry. Ropes held her hands behind her, a wooden pole pressed into her back. Her hand instinctively went to find the hidden dagger she normally had concealed under her belt, but found it wasn't there. She thrashed around trying to loosen the bonds that held her when she heard a voice telling her to stop._

"_You'll hurt yourself if you keep doing that Mercy." The man who spoke was also tied to a pole, hands bond like hers, but he looked like he had taken a severe beating. Dried blood was matted into his hair and his face was a swollen mess. _

"_Maker what did they do to you?" The voice coming out of her was not her own. She wondered if something had been done to her throat to make it sound so different._

"_I tried to cover your escape my love, but I see I failed. They are planning to burn us, just like they did Andraste. I doubt we will get the same act of mercy from them though."_

"_Why are they doing this to us?"_

"_The leaders of the Chantry fear the power you wield. They do not want to give up their power over the people of Thedas. You are a threat to them."_

"_I have only ever served to help my fellow man. I am no threat to them."_

"_One of the soldiers informed me that the Divine and her zealots want to change the laws your mother put into place. They want all mages to be confined and controlled. The work you have done is being undone. They are turning my fellow Templars into mage hunters, not protectors."_

"_How foolish can she be? This will only insure that the Maker will turn away from his children again."_

"_You are the only one who could challenge her. She removes you then mages do not stand a chance." The man's battered face turned sad. "I failed you."_

"_You did not fail me, you have never failed me." Leigh tried to blink back tears, but they made steady streams down her cheeks. "I...I love you."_

"_I have always loved you My Lady. I will die with only one regret, that I was not able to save you."_

"_What a touching display." Rage built up in Leigh's chest as the older woman slowly walked out of the shadows. "This knight has betrayed the Chantry and you my dear have failed in spreading your blasphemy to bring people to your cause."_

"_You will waste away in the Void if I have anything to say about it. You will bring another war to Thedas doing this. Mages are not slaves. My mother fought to free people from tyranny and you would become no better than the magisters who held you under their boot not long ago. If you do this you insure the Maker will never turn his favor back to his children."_

"_You would say anything to save your own skin malificar." The bond man roared and struggled against his bonds._

"_How dare you call her that! Do you know who she is? You damn yourself and all who follow you. Justice will come to you all one day and we will be here to see it."_

"_I doubt that highly. I sentence you both to death by flame. I will give you a few moments to say your goodbyes. I am not heartless." Leigh watched the woman leave and fear gripped her heart. She tried to use her magic, but she couldn't. She felt a empty feeling when she tried to use it._

"_They put a binding spell on you. Your magic is useless." She looked down and saw the same amulet that she had always worn, but the stone was not there just symbols._

"_I am so sorry, my love."_

"_I'm not. I don't want to live if you are not here. I gladly go to the Maker's side because I know you will be there with me."_

"_Always. They will never find them know that. They will be safe." Her thoughts went to two small children. She had to stifle a loud sob knowing she would never see them again. Her eyes met his and she could see the same look in them as hers did._

"_I do not fear death." Their executioners returned carrying torches. _

"_For the crimes against the Chantry your sentence is death. May the Maker have mercy on your souls." They lit the tinder under the man first making Leigh listen to his screams as the flames consumed him. The last thing Leigh felt was the flames lick her body and her own screams._

Leigh shot up from her bed screaming. Her skin still felt like it was on fire as she scrambled out of the bed and she hid herself by her desk. She did not hear the door burst open or Anders calling to her. He found her shaking uncontrollably and still screaming in the corner of the room. When he went to touch her she shrieked and shrunk away from him. Her eyes spun in her head not being able to focus on anything.

"Leigh, it's me. It's Anders." "_Maker, what is wrong with her?" _

"Ser Anders I heard screaming is..." The sight of Hawke on the floor made the question die on Orana's lips. "Holy Maker."

"Orana, I need you to get Aveline now. Go!" The elf ran out of the house as fast as she could. "Leigh, please love look at me." He held her face between his hands and tried to get to her to focus on him. She struggled against him like wild animal caught in a trap. He felt the sting of her nails against his cheek. All he could do was hold on to her, making sure she could not hurt him or herself. It seemed like eternity had passed before the heavy footfalls of Aveline sounded up the stairs.

"Anders, Orana said you nee...ded...my help, what is wrong with her?"

"I don't know, she was fine when she came home. I stayed up a while longer and she went off to bed. I heard her scream and I found her like this. It is like she doesn't know who I am or where she is." The fear on his face made Aveline edgy.

"She doesn't respond to you at all?"

"It is taking everything I have to stop her from hurting herself or me." Aveline knelt down next to them trying to think of what to do.

"Hawke, it's Aveline. Your safe, can you tell me what you see?" Leigh's eyes stared out beyond the guard in front of her, staring at something that wasn't there.

"Fire." Her voice was the barest of whispers.

"Fire?" She shared a look with Anders who had a look just as confused as hers. "Is there something you see that is on fire?

"They...they set me on fire."

"Who did?"

"Templars." The word left her mouth is a wail and Leigh collapsed, sobbing into Anders. Her hands twisted into the fabric of his shirt, holding on to him for dear life.

"Templars? Why would...that makes no sense? Hawke look at me." When she didn't Aveline took another approach. One she knew would get a reaction. "Hawke look at me!" the guard's voice boomed through the small room making even Anders jump. This caught Leigh's attention. Her head snapped up and she stared at Aveline. "That's better. Now what happened?"

"I...I'm not sure all I can remember is fire and Templars." She looked up at Anders and winced. He had scratch marks across him cheek and some of them were bleeding. "I did that didn't I?" Her fingers raised up to his face, but she stopped herself.

"It's fine. I am more worried about you. It did not even look like you knew who I was."

"All I could see was fire and I heard laughter. Like who ever set me ablaze enjoyed seeing me suffer."

"You said that Templars did it."

"I saw armor with the flaming sword on the front of it." Leigh closed her eyes and tried to piece together the dream. "Wait someone else was with them and woman. She said I had to pay for what I had done. She called me a malificar."

"Unless you are a mage I doubt that will ever happen Hawke. I think you have been reading too many of those stories Varric found for you and your imagination got the better of you." A heavy gauntleted hand patted her on the shoulder before helping both her and Anders to their feet. Leigh went and sat on her bed while Anders walked Aveline to the door. "I will be at the Keep if you need me. I need to go get some sleep. I trust you have it from here?"

"Yes, thank you Aveline for coming as quickly as you did. I couldn't reach her, but I had a feeling you could."

"I'm glad I could. I did not like seeing her like that. As long as I have known her she has always been for the most part level headed and calm. What I saw in there was anything but."

"I know, even since the battle with the Arishok she has been different. She is much more wary of everything almost to the point of being jumpy."

"Take care of her Anders. She is the one person who can hold this ragtag group of ours together. If we lose her..."

"We will not lose her." Aveline nodded. Know he would do what ever it took to keep Hawke safe.

"Good night Anders." After he made sure the door to the estate was locked again Anders headed for their room. He found Leigh still sitting on the bed, biting her lower lip and looking deep in thought. He went and sat next to her and waited for her to speak. He had forgotten the marks on his face still needed to be healed. His concern for her made him forget his pain.

"I can't shake the feeling of the flames burning me. My skin still feels hot." His hand touched her bare arm, but her skin felt cool to his touch.

"It was just a dream love."

"It seemed so real." She pulled her knees up to her chest and rested her chin on them. Her eyes caught sight of the scratch marks she had left on his face. "You'd better heal those before they scar." She felt his magic pulse as he healed himself. "I can't believe I did that to you, I am sorry love."

"It was nothing I can't fix. I was more worried about you hurting yourself." Leigh blew out a ragged breath. She hated that the dream effected her this way. She had had nightmares before, but nothing like this one. Anders wrapped his arm around her waist pulling her closer to him. "I am worried about you. You haven't been yourself since the fight with the Qunari. Even the others have seen a change in you."

"I guess almost dying changes a person." "_You must tell him Leigh. Keeping this secret will only make things harder in the long run. He can help you." "I...I'm afraid I will lose him." "Do not be ridiculous, he loves you. Merrill has taught you all she could over these past few months. She is still learning herself. You need him, as he needs you." "What I am to tell him, oh by the way love I am a mage surprise?" "Sarcasm is not helping Hawke." "Don't think you using my surname is going to get me to snap to attention." "It is either you do this or I will." "You wouldn't?" "I would, but I would rather you tell him. I do not think he will take it well from me." Fine, bossy pain in my ass." "There is no need for name calling."_ Leigh was so caught up in her argument with Pash she did not hear him talking to her.

"Leigh, did you hear me?"

"Huh, sorry I...my mind is still hung up on the dream."

"I was saying you need to get some rest, the circles under your eyes are trying to compete with mine."

"I can't go back to sleep right now. My mind will not quiet."

"I could give you something to help you sleep."

"I would rather not." He gave a aggravated sigh, but did not push her. "I need some tea. Would you like some?"

"No." The look on his face told her he was worried and a bit annoyed with her. "I think I will go back to the study and read." He got up and left her alone in their room. She waited til she heard the door to the study close and she crept down the stairs heading for the trap door that led to the cellar. She did not notice Anders was watching her from the shadows. She slipped down into the dark stairwell without a sound and went to the secret room she had found years ago. In the room she stored her father's old robes and magic supplies. The only other person who knew of this room had been her mother. Anders followed at a safe distance through the dark corridors. It was so dark he almost missed the room she had disappeared into. The room was small, but immaculately clean. Leigh was kneeling in front of a chest.

"I wish you were here with me Papa. I feel so lost. I know I have to tell him, but I'm afraid." She rummaged through the chest and pulled out a set of mages robes. Her father had them made for her right before he died. He patterned them after her favorite rogue leathers. "You never got to see me wear this or...or see me become the person you wanted me to be." She stood up and placed the robes on the small potions table before she took her father's staff off the wall. Anders had never seen anything like it. He realized the light in the room was coming from the staff. It gave off a soft warm glow. "Please give me a sign I am doing the right thing."

"Leigh." The speed in which she whirled around with the staff made her looked like a practiced mage. Her eyes went wide seeing Anders standing in the doorway.

"Anders, what are you doing down here?"

"I was about to ask you the same thing. May I?" His hand wrapped around the staff over hers. She let him take it and watched as he looked it over.

"It was my father's. It was one of the few things we were able to take with us from Lothering."

"And the robes?"

"They...they are mine."

"Yours?" She turned away from him to gather her courage. "Love please talk to me."

"I have something to tell you and I have no clue where to begin."

"You know you can tell me anything." She held out her hand in front of her and ignited a fireball. The look of shock that crossed his face would have been comical to Leigh any other time, but she knew this was dead serious. "Maker's breath!" She closed her hand and waited for him to recover. "How?"

"I was born a mage, but my magic started to manifest itself when I was four."

"Four? Most mages do not coming into their powers til they near adolescence."

"So I have been told."

"You have been hiding this from me the whole time?" He began to shake with anger.

"When you met me I could not use magic. I was bound to protect my family."

"There is no way to bind a mage's magic, unless you make them Tranquil."

"Fade spirits can if they are strong enough. My father had no choice, I was a danger to myself and my family."

"Your father did this to you because he thought you were a danger?" His voice raise and she could hear the echo of Justice ringing in it.

"I had a nightmare and my magic went crazy. The next morning our neighbors informed my father that the trees in the woods near by were turned upside down. I did that without knowing it. It took a few more incidents before he figured out what was happening. My family had to move because of me. I put everyone in danger of the Templars finding us. They would have killed my father and me as well."

"You were a child, all they would have done was throw you in the Circle."

"Not if they found out how powerful I was. The trees I turned over, well lets just say it was about four acres worth give or take." His eye brows shot up and his eyes went wide. The look on her face told him she was not kidding about the trees. His head spun trying to take this all in. He was torn between wanting to scream at her and wanting to embrace her and never let go. "They never would have been able to hold me, let alone control me. The rite of Tranquility is useless on me as well, my will is too strong or at least that was what I was told." Anders fell silent and began to pace in the little room. "My father knew if the Chantry got their hands on me I would be dead and if someone else got their hands on me I would be used as a weapon. I didn't get use to having my magic so I really didn't miss it. I sure as hell didn't miss the constant whispers from demons trying to possess me."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I wasn't allowed to, even my mother had no idea. My father told her it was him that caused the trouble. When I was bound I made a promise that could not be broken to never let anyone know what I was. I wanted to tell you that first day after I went to help you with Karl. I wanted to let you know I understood better than anyone what you are. You've had Justice in your head for what six maybe seven years? I have had the spirit that bound me in mine for over twenty years." His head snapped up at this piece of information. The cold look in his eyes made Leigh want to shrink into the wall. "_Well he hates me, are you happy now?" "He does not hate you, he is just confused and afraid, mostly for you I might add." _

"This spirit, has been joined with you for over twenty years?"

"No, she was inside the amulet I use to wear. The stone held a piece of the Fade so she could always be with me."

"Then how could you hear her?"

"She was very powerful and also very kind to me. I don't understand how I was able to hear her, I just could."

"When the stone was broken did she return to the Fade or did she die?"

"No to both."

"Then..." Realization crossed his face and his eyes turned sad. "She is in you."

"She saved me. I would have died that day. It was never anything either of us wanted. I have seen what happened to you and Justice, I am so afraid I will..."

"Corrupt her."

"I didn't mean...this is all coming out wrong." Leigh's anger flared and she punched the stone wall beside her. She heard the sound of her bones breaking, but she was too angry at herself to care. She raised her hand to hit the wall again, but his caught her wrist.

"Stop!"

"Why should I? It is very clear you are pissed at me."

"I am not, this is just a lot to take in. Let me take a look at your hand."

"No."

"Leigh don't start acting like a child and let me see your hand." She thrust her arm out to him, but did not look at him. "You nearly shattered your knuckles. Maker, what am I going to do with you?"

"Gift wrap me and leave me in front of the Gallows sounds appropriate." His magic sputtered and his anger began to rise.

"That is the most asinine thing I have ever heard you say! I would rather cut out my own heart than ever let those bastards touch you. I would cover this city in blood to prevent anything ever happening to you."

"And this is the reason I was afraid to tell you any of this. I don't want you to become so on edge that I lose you." Leigh brushed a lock of hair out of his eyes with her good hand then rested it on his cheek. "If I lose you it will kill me." Anders eyes fluttered closed, a heavy sigh escaped his lips and her leaned into her touch.

"So you never learned how to use your magic. I guess I have a lot of work ahead of me teaching you."

"The only place I was safe to use my magic was in the Fade. My father and Pash would instruct me. I was good with primal and elemental spells."

"Pash?"

"The spirit, I couldn't pronounce her name when I was younger. Compassion is a large word for a four year old." He started to laugh.

"That is what the inscription meant on your amulet."

"It was to remind me what was sacrificed so I could be safe."

"So no one else knows?"

"Well..."

"Who else knows?"

"Merrill. I went to her for help. I thought she could teach me enough to control my magic since she and I have the same powers. And before you start about blood magic, she never even brought it up. She knows how I feel about it."

"How long have you been learning from her?"

"For a few months now. I knew I had to do something after the rage demon. I did not want to let anything like that happen ever again."

"That was you that brought that thing here? You are lucky you weren't possessed." Leigh just stared at him with a amused look on her face. He noticed and remembered. "Right, you already are. You didn't think I would help you?"

"I knew you would, but I know you too well love. You were already worried about what would happen to me if the Knight Commander decided to storm the estate and found you here. Now that I am unbound we are in more danger and I fear you will do something that will get you killed. I thought if I could learn to control my magic, I could take the some of the burden off your shoulders. I don't want you to feel you have to protect me all the time."

"I love you, so I do feel I have to protect you now more than ever. I was fighting to free mages, but after what happened with that girl in the tunnels...I walked away. I can't control myself or my anger. I don't want you to have to pay for that."

"It is my choice."

"I know better than to argue with you, but please tell me you will let Merrill and I teach you before you go and show off your new found powers."

"That is the plan. Maybe between the two of us we can get her to give up blood magic."

"If anyone could do it, it would be you love." Anders started healing her again. "You said your father was a healer, did he teach you?"

"He never got the chance. Pash can heal, but I don't know if I can tap into that." She felt her bones start to comeback together. The pain began to ease wiping the grimace off her face. "That feels so much better."

"Well stop punching stone walls and it wouldn't hurt in the first place." The playful tone in his voice was back, but his eyes still showed worry. "I know Justice has opinions about people, to the point he goes to far. Do I have to be prepared for Pash to do the same to me?"

"She has taken a very hands off approach when it comes to me, but this is still all very new to both of us. I don't know what will happen and neither does she." "_Would it ease his mind if I talk to him?" "I can ask." _"Would you like to talk to her?"

"I..I'm not sure, she isn't going to fireball me is she?" Leigh could not help it and let out a giggle. "It is a legitimate question, especially after what Justice has tried to do to you."

"She will not hurt you Anders. Pash is very kind and very patient. She has to be to deal with me all these years. As you keep telling me I am quite stubborn. I will be listening so please don't fret."

"Alright, I will talk with her." Leigh closed her eyes and relaxed so Pash could come forward in her mind. "_Please be nice to him." "I will not harm him Leigh. He is a good man with a noble heart. He just needs to let go of his rage." "Maybe we can help him with that and it will make Justice less volatile." "Perhaps."_ Anders watched her skin crack with power like his does when Justice bursts forward, but instead of a bright blue glow hers was a warm red one. When her eyes opened he could see they were red also. It unnerved him a little to see the woman he loves look like this.

"Greetings healer." Pash's voice was warm and airy. It sounded far younger than he had expected.

"I don't know how to greet you. When I met Justice he was trying to saved trapped souls in the Fade. He wasn't much for small talk."

"You may call me Pash. I would first like to thank you for all you have done for Leigh."

"I haven't done anything, but love her."

"You have done more than you know. You were there for her after they took her sister and after her mother's death. She blames herself for both, though there was nothing she could have done to prevent either instance. Love is a powerful thing. Those who know it are richer for it and those who don't live half lives. You have brought her back to life, when she thought all she had was the burden of being the constant protector."

"She has given me far more than I could ever give her. She accepted what I was without question or concern. Justice gave her every reason to walk away, but she stayed even when it could have cost her, her life."

"My brother sees everything as black or white, right or wrong. Justice does not know how to fathom the mortal heart. He has tasted memories and feelings, but can not grasp them. Being what I am I know of love, mercy and passion. I also can step away from the not so pleasant emotions. He is not to be faulted for not understanding. He was not made to know these things."

"You speak of him as if you know him." The look on her face became thoughtful for a moment. In her eyes he saw something he could not quite put his finger on. It looked like sorrow, but he wasn't sure.

"I know him well. He was my companion in the Fade. He never understood why I tried to always help your kind when they traveled through our home. He thought I was wasting my energy on mortals, but he never abandoned me."

"I am sorry for what I have done to him. I never wanted this for us. I thought I was helping a friend and he in turn could help me."

"I know, neither of you is at fault. I know all too well why you hold so much anger in you. I have seen many times the evils heaped upon mages. It was never meant to be like this. They took the teachings of Andraste and twisted them to serve their own purpose."

"What? I don't understand."

"She meant for ever mortal to live free not just the ones who were born without magic. She wanted a world where magic was a gift not a curse. The reason she fought the Tevinters was to be free, not only the slaves they coveted, but also to make Thedas into a place where everyone had the same freedoms."

"How did it all go wrong?"

"Fear, pride, jealousy, take your pick. Andraste held no ill will towards mages."

"That is not what what the Chantry preaches. They said she wanted mages controlled so they could not rise to power again."

"That is what they want you to believe. They leave out that she had a daughter who was born a mage and took over after they burned her mother."

"Maker's breath! If her daughter was a mage then how was the Chantry able to do this to us?"

"They hunted her down, killing her and her Templar. With them gone there was no one to dispute the changes made to the Chant of Light. The faithful of today have no idea they are following a lie at least where mages are concerned."

"Is there any proof to this, I mean is it written down anywhere."

"After this long a time I doubt it would matter."

"Your right, what matters is changing it now."

"What matters is protecting Leigh and getting her ready for what will come. I can feel the unrest in this city, it will not take long for everything to fall apart." The story Anders had just heard from Pash resonated in his head.

"Wait the dream Leigh had about being burned by Templars, was that what happened to Andraste's daughter?"

"Yes, it was not my intent for her to see it, but my memories are now hers." "_So that is what that was." I apologize Leigh, I know it was a horrific thing to go through." _"We will talk again Anders for now take the book in the chest and read it. It will give you a better insight to what Leigh is and other things."

"Thank you, and thank you for saving her life. I don't know what I would do without her."

"You are welcome." The red glow faded and Leigh's haunting gray eyes returned to normal. She swayed on her feet and fell into his waiting arms.

"Maker, that felt weird. It is like watching myself over my shoulder, but not being able to do anything."

"Welcome to my life." Once she got her bearings back Leigh took her mage robes and her father's staff, while Anders took the book. She closed the secret door behind them and they returned to the larder. "If you wear those you won't be able to fight like you normally do. They will not protect you at all."

"I am going to modify them and add leather under the bodice. It might take a while, but it is doable."

"First you need to sleep and so do I."

"Are you alright with all this?"

"That your a mage?" She nodded, biting her lower lip. "Leigh, you are the most important person in my life. You have stood by me when I gave you ever reason not to, why do you think I would abandon you over this?"

"I don't, it is just...I have never had much luck in people sticking around. The fact that all of you have this long seems like a miracle to me."

"We all love you, in our own ways. To some of us you are like a sister, to me you are my other half. You keep me anchored. You completely own my heart Leigh, no other woman can ever say that, not even my mother."

"Then I am the luckiest girl in all of Thedas and no that is not a joke. If there was any way to marry you I would jump at it in a heart beat. I hope one day it will be possible."

"I do too, now off to bed with you before you fall over."

"Only if you join me."

"I wouldn't have it any other way love." They ascended the stairs to their room arm in arm. Neither knowing what the future would bring. The only thing they knew was they would face what ever came together.


	15. Chapter 15

"Hawke there is trouble in front of the Keep. Orsino and Meredith are at it again." Aveline's voice rang through her home and Leigh slide down the banister of her stairs. Anders thankfully was not home to hear this. He had just recently been pulled back in to help the Mage Underground again. It had been three years since the fight with the Arishok and the city was on the verge of another war. This time between mage and Templar. With the Viscount dead Meredith stepped into the vacuum of power like a over eager child. Her policies were crushing the mages and the mages were now fighting back.

"That bitch should just step down and let someone else govern over Kirkwall."

"She is trying to keep the peace, but the mages are making it difficult." Leigh felt a bit of shock go through her hearing the familiar lilt that came from the foyer doorway. There stood Sebastian Vael in all his splendor. They had been avoiding each other for a long time. She talked to him when she would go make her secret visits with her sister in the Chantry. Cullen's and his doing for which she was grateful. Leigh had not seen him much over the last few years. He came with them for some of their adventures, but he never came to see her at the estate anymore. Not since she had stood between him and Justice. The kiss they had shared weeks later was never spoke of as promised, but their was still tension from it between them. Recently he had traveled to Starkhaven to gather support, Fenris had gone with him at her request so the prince had someone watching his back.

"Sebastian, what a pleasant surprise." She went up to him and gave him a friendly hug. "I wasn't expecting you back for another week."

"Things went better than planned. My allies are falling into place. Hopefully it won't be long."

"I'm glad it is going well for you. I wish it would do so here."

"We should hurry Hawke, before it gets ugly. Even the nobles are out there. I fear no good will come of this." Leigh nodded and followed the Captain of the Guard out to the square. Sebastian fell in step next to her. He watched her expression as it turned into a mask of annoyance. He could hear the raised voices up ahead of them. Orsino was spouting his views as Meredith countered them. Orsino's face lite up when he saw Leigh approaching.

"And here is the Champion of Kirkwall. I would like to see what is her thoughts on all this. Or do you fear what she will say?"

"Leave the Champion out of this Orsino. She has no opinion on this matter." Meredith's glare tried to burn into Leigh. It was like she was daring her to speak. Leigh smiled at Orsino, but her face turned hard when she turned to the Knight Commander.

"I can speak for myself Knight Commander."

"And what are your thoughts in all this?"

"I think you have gone to far Meredith. The more you push the mages the more trouble this city will have. You need to step down before we have another war on our hands. I for one would rather not see that."

"And you think the mages spewing their views is helping the matter. Chantry Laws are clear in this matter. Magic is to serve man not rule him." Leigh began to laugh at the Templar's words.

"Most mages I have met just want to be able to stay with their families instead of being locked in a prison. You rip them from their mother's arms and expect them to stop being a person, to what serve the very people who will not give them that right?"

"It is clear where you stand Champion, but you do not understand the danger of these people."

"I do understand full well what happens when a mage falls to blood magic, but I wonder how many would turn to it if they had the same freedoms that are given to the rest of us? They are no different from any of us." Meredith was speechless. She had always thought that Leigh Hawke was nothing but a low class refugee from backwater Ferelden. She did not expect a well spoken, well educated woman to be inside this woman. "You hear dark rumors here in the city of both sides. If you speak of what is to be feared all the time you diminish what good is being done by both sides." The crowd parted as the Grand Cleric walked her way to the debtors.

"My, my what a commotion you all are making. Orsino do you think this wise?"

"I...no Your Grace." He bowed and stepped back.

"Please everyone return to your homes. This will not be decided today." The older woman turned to the fully armored Templars. "Young men please escort the First Enchanter back to the Gallows. Gently if you please."

"But he deserves to be clapped in irons for trying to start a riot." Elthina shook her head sadly at the Knight Commander.

"You are not helping matters either my dear with your temper, now go back to the Gallows and calm down like a good girl." Inside Leigh was rolling with laughter, but she kept her face neutral as not to make the situation worse. Meredith stormed off as the last of the nobles scattered back to their homes. "Thank you for stepping in Champion, this city has had enough trouble."

"I agree Your Grace. Is there nothing you can do to stop this?"

"You must think I hold more power than I do. I am just a servant of the Maker. I can only suggest and guide them." Leigh bowed and excused herself from the conversation. She thought the Grand Cleric was a kind woman, but her refusal to make Meredith take her choke hold off the city was not helping. She sighed and wondered how long it will take for the city to implode. She felt arms wrap around her and a soft kiss landed on her temple. Leigh twisted her torso and saw the face of her lover smiling down on her.

"I heard you dress down the Knight Commander. She looked like she was ready to burst into flames."

"I behaved myself thank you. I could have laid into her much more, but it is like talking to a wall. She will not listen." Out of the corner of her eye Leigh saw Sebastian with his fists clenched as he watched them together. "I am glad you are home."

"Hm, and why is that?"

"I have missed you the last few nights, well I should say half the nights."

"Sorry love, there is a lot in the clinic for me to do." She knew it was code for let's not talk about it here. "I have no patients right now so I am all yours for a few days."

"All mine huh? I will just have to find something for you to do to keep you out of trouble." He smiled warmly at her before kissing her deeply. Anders kept his eyes open and he winked at Sebastian. He enjoyed making the prince jealous, but more over he liked to see him angry.

"Hawke when you have a moment I would like to speak to you at the Chantry, alone if at all possible. I must take my leave, I hope to see you soon." She swore she saw steam coming out of Sebastian's ears as he walked away. Aveline cleared her throat and shook her head.

"If he'd just scream it from the rooftops he would be less obvious."

"Obvious about what?"

"Hawke you can't tell me you haven't noticed that Sebastian can not take his eyes off you and when ever your with Anders he excuses himself from the group. I think he is in love with you." Anders scowled at the still retreating form of the exiled prince. "Please do not throw a fireball or lightning at him. I don't need that mess to try to hid."

"He will behave Aveline. I know Sebastian thinks of me as more than a friend, but I don't see him as anymore than a brother of sorts. He knows how I feel about Anders and will not push the fact."

"Just watch yourself and Anders. Sebastian is very invested in the Chantry and he knows full well what Anders is. I don't want to see any of my friends hurt."

"I will Aveline. I don't want to see anyone hurt either."

"I need to get my morning reports done. I will see you later."

"Bye Aveline. So my love, do I really have you for a few days all to myself?"

"Yes, and I could think of a few ways to spend it." Leigh jumped up and wrapped her legs around his hips and her arms around his neck. "I see you are on the same way of thinking I am."

"Great minds think alike." She whispered in his ear. "I have missed you. I know you said don't ask, but is everything alright?"

"It is becoming more difficult to get some people out of there. We are having to use different methods to achieve our goals."

"I wish I could help you, but I understand why you don't want me to. I just worry one time I will wake up alone and it will be forever." Anders rubbed the bridge of his nose trying to alleviate the dull ache in his head. He hated seeing her worry about him like this. He hated even more leaving their bed in the middle of the night while she still slept. She never complained or asked too many questions, but he knew it was weighing heavily on her. He could not let her get involved with his plan. Her hands would be clean of any wrong doing on his part. This was something Justice and he agreed on. Neither Leigh nor Pash would have anything to do with what they were planning should the worst happen. He felt her palm lay flat on his forehead and a small wave of magic surged into his skin. The ache vanished immediately, he could see the slight red tint to her eyes, but there was no other sign of Pash to be seen. They had learned to work in harmony together unlike he and Justice. For a while it had gotten better. Pash was able to temper Justice for the better part of the last three years. It was only when they came across a group of young mages who had been beaten and left to rot by some Templars about four months ago, had Anders anger spurred Justice to become Vengeance once more.

"You need to be careful doing that out in public Leigh. What if someone saw?"

"No one saw I made sure and you needed it. Your getting those circles under your eyes again and you are not eating enough. Please don't throw yourself back into this so much that I lose you to it."

"I am trying not to. How about I cook tonight and we have a night in to ourselves? We could send everyone out for the night and it will just be you and me."

"I would like that, but if you try to run off tonight and play hero to the MU, I swear I will bolt your feet to the floor." Her playful smirk had just enough hint of that she meant her words. Anders threw his hands up in surrender before sweeping her off her feet and heading for their home. He was not sure how much time he had left with Leigh, but he would make it count when he could. He owed her so much more than that, but for now this was all he could give. His heart ached every time he looked at her and he had to remind himself she was the reason he was fighting. She was the reason he had to do what he was planning. Anders swore to the Maker he was not going to lose her to the Templars and he meant to keep that promise even if it meant his death.

OoO

Anders had returned home after being away for a few days to find Leigh was not there. It was the middle of the night and she was still not home. Fear and panic set in as he went to wake Bodahn to find out if he knew where she had went. He found the dwarf in his room, it took all his will power not to violently shake the poor man awake.

"Bodahn wake up!" The dwarf opened his bleary eyes and blinked a few times trying to focus.

"Master Anders?"

"Sorry to wake you, but do you know where Hawke is?" Bodahn still trying to wake up thought for a moment then went out to get the note for Anders that Leigh had left.

"A woman asked Serah Hawke to find her brother. She left late this afternoon for the coast. She told me to give you this letter should you return and she was not here."

"Thank you." Anders read the note and his heart jumped up into his throat.

**Hello love,**

**I was approached by a woman named Delilah Howe. She has asked me to find her brother Nathaniel. He was last seen in the Deep Roads where Bartrand left us to die. I took Varric, Fenris and Merrill with me. I hope to be back as soon as I can. I asked Aveline and Isabela to keep a look out for you. I hate leaving you, but this woman was very worried about her brother. Stay safe my love.**

**Love always,**

**Leigh **

"Maker what was she thinking? How long ago did you say she left?"

"A few hours before sunset messere."

"If Aveline or Isabela comes to check if I am back let them know I went after Hawke. She has no idea what she is getting herself into." The dwarf nodded and helped Anders pack a bag for the trek he was going to make. He threw Leigh's old rogue cloak over his shoulders and pulled up the hood over his head to hide who he was. He hoped some of her lessons in stealth paid off so he would not be caught by any unsavory characters. "Take care of the estate while we are gone."

"Of course Master Anders, you take care of yourself out on the road. Night is not a safe time to travel alone."

"Neither is traveling in the Deep Roads when you are not a Grey Warden, but I must go after her." He ran out into the darkness and headed for the coast as fast as his legs would carry him. "_How could she be so foolish?" "Darkspawn are far to dangerous for her to be fighting even if she finds Nathaniel. She is not a Warden. It was sure luck that the Taint did not take her the last time she was down there." "You are not helping Justice. I am worried enough. What in the name of the Void is Nate doing here?" "Maybe he is looking for us." "I hope not I really don't want what happened to Rolen to happen to him. I always liked Nate, but I will not go back to the bloody Wardens. Not when I have to protect Leigh and make sure the Templars never lay a hand on her." "We will never let that happen. She is too important to the future of mages." "I was more thinking the reason is because I love her and it would destroy me if I lose her." "I know my friend." _It was times like these he was glad the Warden Commander had them do forced runs to bring up their stamina. He was at least a half a day behind them and had to make up ground. He hoped he caught up to them before they went underground or he might never find them.

OoO

"Hawke behind you!" Leigh rolled to her left and barely dodged the charging ogre. They had found Nathaniel Howe, but were now surrounded by a army of darkspawn. The ogre crashed into the wall right behind her. She scrambled to get some breathing room between her and the monster.

"Varric cover me, I have to bring that bastard down before it kills us all." She heard the thunk of Bianca being reloaded and then saw the hurlocks that flanked her fall with arrows in their heads. One of the arrows belonged to the Warden she had promised to find the other being from Varric. Leigh somersaulted between the ogre's legs and lashed out with her daggers cutting into the back of his knees. It fell forward and she jumped on it's back. She brought her blades across it's throat and watched the black ichor splash on the stone floor. With a shutter the ogre died and Leigh sprinted to help Merrill who was being overrun by darkspawn.

"Duck Daisy!" The elf fell to the floor as a hail of arrows rained down on the mob surrounding her. She felt someone pull to her feet making her run with them. She and Leigh hid behind a pillar trying to catch their breath.

"By the Creators there is no end to them."

"We need to get over to the men and stay together. Then they can't pick us off one by one." Leigh looked around the pillar and saw an opening. "We need to move. Now!" Leigh pushed Merrill in front of her and covered her as she ran. The rogue stopped and fought two darkspawn that tried to grab both women. Merrill made it to the others, before turning and seeing Leigh was not behind her.

"Hawke run!" Leigh barely heard Merrill over the growls of the hurlocks that were surrounding her. With her escape route cut off Leigh stood her ground. The ground rumbled beneath her feet hailing the appearance of two more ogres.

"Shit! This is not good." She saw a dark figure running full bore at her. Leigh didn't get anytime to react as she was knocked out of the path of the orges. The dark figure caught the brunt of the hit from one of them only to be tramped by the other. Leigh rolled to her feet to find herself surrounded again. She looked over to her friends and saw they too were being overwhelmed. "Maker save us."

"Hey you ugly blighters why don't you come over here and get a taste of ole Ogrhen." A dwarf in full armor stood a few yards from where Leigh was fighting for her life.

"Sigrun help the rogue, Ogrhen take down the ogre on the left I'll take the one on the right. Velanna get them on their feet if they're injured." Leigh could tell the one barking orders was a woman, but her face was covered by her hood. The female dwarf stood back to back with Leigh and they slashed their way out of the squad of darkspawn that accosted them. Once they were free Leigh went to find the figure that had been trampled by the ogres. She found the body back near the stairs at the far end of the hall. The dark cloak wrapped around the body made her pause.

"_That's my old cloak...No please tell me he didn't." _Leigh fell to her knees and removed the hood to reveal Anders face. "No, no...Anders wake up. You can't do this to me." She saw his body was severely broken and he was bleeding from his nose and mouth. "He is still breathing, okay we can do this. You have to stay with me, do you hear me Anders you don't get to leave me behind. You keep fighting." A hand on her shoulder made her whip around ready to fight.

"Wait, I am here to help. I am a healer."

"Help him please, I can't..." Velanna did not look at the face of the man she was healing she just got right down to it. Leigh handed her what lyrium potions she had to keep the magic flowing.

"Shit! Hawke, Broody is down!" Leigh left the elf warden to get her other fallen friend.

"Varric, Merrill this way." She met them half way and helped Merrill drag Fenris over to the healer. Velanna stood up and faced Leigh.

"He is too far gone for me to help him. If we had our other healer still with us he could have saved him, but he has been gone for years. Even if I could save him I can feel the taint in his blood. To heal him would bring him nothing but suffering" Varric looked down at the fallen man and his eyes nearly popped out of his head. He opened his mouth, but Leigh cut him off.

"Thank you for your help. My friend here can heal. I think your fellows need you more than we do." Velanna nodded and ran back the other Wardens. "Merrill, Anders taught you how to heal right?"

"Yes, but I am not that good at it. His injuries are far too grave. I would end up killing him."

"I want you to help Fenris his injuries are not life threatening, but we need him up because I am not sure how many more of those things are out there." Leigh turned back to Anders' prone form and rested her hands on his chest. His breathing was becoming more shallow. "Varric if you put what I am about to do in your stories about me I swear I will make this look like a bloody tea party." Her hands began to glow with healing magic and Varric's jaw dropped to the floor.

"Maker's breath Hawke how...?"

"Bethany wasn't the only one of us kids born a mage. I just hid it better." Her eyes closed in concentration, she could feel the broken bones and torn muscle knitting back together as she poured more of her mana into him. It had taken the better part of a year to learn how to even tap into healing for her, but once it took she was almost on par with Anders. In her mind's eye she could see the intricate workings of his organs and how to piece them back to being whole and functional again. Under her hands his chest started to rise and fall normally. The blood that had been seeping from his nose and mouth ceased and retreated back where it belonged. Once she knew he was completely healed she let herself sit back and caught her breath. Joy soared in her heart when his eyes fluttered open and fell on her. "Welcome back to the world of the living." He sat up slowly, groaning and rubbing his head

"What happened?"

"You got trampled by not one, but two ogres you twit. What in the name of Andraste were you thinking pulling a stunt like that?" His head cleared enough for him to remember that he had come here to help her and that he had pushed her out of the path of said ogres.

"I was trying to save you. Remember I am the Grey Warden, it is what we do."

"I am also a rogue which means I was waiting til they were committed to charging me before I vanish in a puff of smoke and stab them from behind." Both of them glared at the other for a few seconds before she threw herself at him and kissed him fiercely.

"If this is the reaction I get for being stupid, I think I will be stupid more often." The sound of a ogre's death roar made Anders sit up more and look over Leigh's shoulder. He blood froze in his veins when he saw his old comrades standing over the dead monster. "Andraste's tits what are they doing here?"

"I guess the same thing I was. They just seem to show up right after the ogres tapped danced on your head." The look of fear in his eyes made Leigh worry. "Keep the hood up and try not to draw attention to yourself. I can see they are the last people you want to know you are here and I don't want to have to fight them to keep them from taking you."

"Blondie aren't these suppose to be friends of yours?"

"In another life yes they were, but...I killed any chance of them trusting me ever again." Varric's eye brow arched up, but he let it go. Now was not the time for stories. "Shit, more darkspawn."

"Can you get Fenris to his feet it looks like we are going to need the help." He turned and went to work rousting the elf. Leigh stood up when she felt all the hairs on the back of her neck stand at attention. She could feel dark magic hiding somewhere on the far side of the hall. Out of the settling dusk could be seen five emissaries floating towards the battered Wardens. She heard Nathaniel shout out a warning.

"Emissaries in the clear!" All the Wardens readied their weapons, but most looked to spent to keep up the fight. Out in the middle of the hall Leigh spotted Anders' staff and his pack. Without thinking she ran for it, dodging spells as she went. Anders' panicked yells echoed off the wall of the chamber, but she did not slow. Leigh slide and picked up the staff placing herself between the darkspawn and the Wardens. She stood defiantly staff in hand and readied her spell.

The Warden Commander watched the rogue run out in front of her before she could give her orders to her fellow wardens. "What the hell does she think she is doing? She is going to get herself killed. Nate cover me I need to go help her."

"On it Raven." Drawing her daggers she ran full speed to aid the other rogue she narrowly missed yet another stampeding ogre. It cut off her path to Leigh as it turned and tried to get it's rotting hands on Raven. "Commander more in coming"

"By the blood of the Maker there is no end to them. Fall back and find cover. Now!" Raven gritted her teeth and prepared to start the deadly dance with the behemoth in her way. "_I might just have to break my promise to you Alistair. I don't know how we are going to survive this one."_ A sharp whistle sounded of the walls getting everyone's attention. The Wardens fell back to where Leigh's friends were hiding trying desperately to catch their breaths before the next wave overran them.

"Wait I thought she was a rogue, how is she doing that?" None of Leigh's friends decided to answer. Anders pulled the hood down lower on his face to keep from being seen. He wished he had Leigh's way of becoming invisible, especially when Velanna saw he was standing there. "And how are you on your feet? Your injuries were very severe." Velanna looked thoroughly confused to see Anders up and alive.

"I...My friend here is a pretty good healer." He dropped the octave of his voice to hide who he was.

"She did you no favors, you have the darkspawn taint running through your veins." Nathaniel cleared his throat to stop Velanna from being any blunter. "What? You have seen what the taint does when you are not a Warden. It would be kinder just to slit his throat right now."

"Velanna, enough. We might not make it out of here as it is. If he starts to turn we will end it, but we need as many hands as we can get right now." Anders shifted his weight nervously hoping they would drop the subject.

"What is the Commander doing out there?"

"What she does best killing darkspawn. It is like watching a master painter paint, she does it so well." Sigrun gave a grim smile to her fellows. "Though I think that girl out there would give her a run for her sovereigns. Doesn't she remind you of someone?"

"Yes she does." A strange expression came over Nathaniel's face. "Even that staff looks like his, but Anders is gone Sigrun. He is not coming back."

"I...I know. Justice too." He solemnly nodded and continued to watch the fight. Leigh was holding her own against the five emissaries as Raven slowly took out the ogre piece by piece. Leigh stamped the ground with Ander's staff and the whole place began to shake violently. It got the darkspawn mages' attention. She swung the staff in a wide arch and connected with the closest one to her. She hit it with such force that it cracked the creature's neck. The others threw spells at her, but could not hit their mark. Leigh was too evasive.

"Merrill I need your staff."

"Why?"

"I need to help her. I can feel more of them coming." He dropped his voice on the last part so the other Wardens did not hear.

"Alright, but be careful."

"I will and get Fenris on his feet. We will need his sword soon." Merrill handed him her staff and gave him one last worried look. He raced out of the hiding place and first blasted the half dead ogre with a freezing spell. He knew the Warden fighting it would be able to finish the monster off. It did not take him long to get to her side. She threw him his staff and took Merrill's in return. "Having fun dear?"

"Loads." She linked her arm in his and pulled him out of the way of a burst of lightning. "Where are they all coming from?"

"With all the Wardens here it is like a beacon to them. We can feel their presence and in turn they know where we are too."

"We need to end this before one of us gets killed." Anders bent almost backwards to avoid being seared by a fireball, but it caught the cloak he was wearing. He tried to beat the flames out and only succeeded in spreading them. Leigh cut the tie that held it on him and pulled it off. "Cat's out of the bag now. Just fight, we will deal with your old friends later, if we survived that is."

Raven shattered the ogre after the hooded mage shot it with ice. She receded back to the others to regroup. Every part of her body ached, it had been too long since she had fought like this. Life at court had not given her much time to hone her skills. Also the fact she was now the mother of a very energetic little boy made being here all the more difficult. She never would have agreed to this if it had been anyone else but Nathaniel she would have stayed home. She was a Warden that would never change, but her loyalty was to the people she conscripted. They were as much her family as her original companions from the Blight.

"We need to get out of here and now."

"We can't they are blocking the exit with a barrier. The only way we could is..." Nathaniel's voice died when he saw a person he never thought he would ever see again. "Anders?" Raven's turned her head back to the fight that still was taking place. The sight of the man they all had thought dead struck her speechless. Nathaniel wasted no time after seeing his old friend fighting for his life to run out of cover and start shooting at the emissaries. The other Wardens followed right behind him. Raven and Sigrun went to the left, both throwing smoke grenades to confuse their prey. Ogrhen charged head on swinging his ax and slicing the darkspawn in half. Velanna hung back throwing heal spells when needed. Varric stood guard while Merrill tried to wake Fenris. The dwarf watched the battle unfold before him. Hawke and Anders almost looked like they were dancing together. They moved as one never missing a beat, he would cast a freezing spell and she would follow with a stonefist to shatter whomever he froze. It would make for one hell of a story if Hawke had not threatened him with death to keep her secret. Her safety was his utmost concern. Without Leigh their merry little band of misfits would crumble and Varric much liked having his dysfunctional family in tact.

"Leigh we need to take out the one that is staying in the back. He is the one that made the barriers."

"Watch my back. I think it is time to show them what a real mage can do." Leigh took a deep breath and focused her mana. "_Fire or lightning?" "You have always liked fire Leigh, I would say stick with what works." "Fire it is then." _Fire wreathed her hand and her eyes glowed red. Her target snarled at her and she just smiled. "This ends now!" Her hand rose in the air and a fire storm erupted over the last of the darkspawn's heads. The cavern filled with their dying shrieks and the smell of rotten burnt flesh. The sounds and the smell would be enough to haunt Leigh's dreams for the rest of her life. When the flames subsided having no more fuel to burn Anders turned to face his fellow Wardens. Their faces were unreadable to Leigh and her fear of them taking him away or killing him made her put herself between him and them. Both sides stared at each other waiting for the other to speak or make a more. "_Someone is coming Leigh and his thoughts are dark." "More darkspawn?" "No, much worse." "What is worse than darkspawn?" "A Templar."_


	16. Chapter 16

Anders did not like the look on Leigh's face. It was a cross between rage and horror. His eyebrow arched up in question and she mouthed the word Templar to him. His stomach fell to his feet, he pulled her close to him whispering in her ear his plan to get them out of this. Her eyes showed no hesitation only love and determination. He nearly forgot about the other Wardens til he felt a cloak fall on his shoulders and the hood pulled over his head to hide his face.

"Just stay still and quiet." Nathaniel's voice sounded from behind him. It did not take long for him to realize why they closed ranks around him. The Templar he knew well enough from his time after Raven left as their Commander. Addler a pathetic little shit of a man who followed Rolen around like a little lost Mabari. He idolized Rolen and took his oath as a hunter of mages very seriously.

"Well, well Nathaniel I thought I was the only one to survive. I guess I was wrong." His voice was like nails on a chalkboard to Leigh.

"Yes Addler you were wrong. I am surprised to see you here, I was led to believe you were transferred to Orlais after I became Commander in Ferleden." That news came as a surprise to Anders who was now squeezing Leigh's hand. Justice was fighting for control and it took everything in him not to let the spirit have it's way. Pash felt the struggle in the mage and sent calming waves to Justice. He still raged, but stopped pushing to be free.

"I am here on business for the Chantry."

"You are a Warden the Chantry has no claim to you now."

"I am a Templar and I have a obligation to find that monster you let loose on the world."

"And what monster would that be?" The steely voice of Raven made Addler jump.

"I..." The painted face she wore was unnerving at best to those who knew her, but to those who didn't Raven looked like she could be your worst nightmare. Addler found his barrings and continued. "The apostate Anders. There are rumors he is alive and well in Kirkwall. That he has the ear of the Champion and she is protecting him." A evil laugh escaped Raven's lips and she shook her head.

"Anders is dead. If he wasn't you would have found him by now with his phylactery right?"

"For some reason his phylactery is missing."

"Must have been all the moving around it did. The Chantry should keep better care of those things."

"We will find him if he is still alive and he will pay for what his did to Rolen. If you protect him so will you." In a blur a dagger was at his throat. Raven had a handful of his hair tipping his head back.

"You dare threaten me you little piss ant. I survived Ostagar and the bloody Archdemon. Do you think I fear you?" He stuttered and shook in her grasp. "You have no idea who I am or what I can do. You threaten my family I will end you and display your body were everyone can see. Now I suggest you leave and slink back under the Divine's skirts before I change my mind." She released him and he fell to his knees.

"You would protect a murder, an abomination?"

"I would protect a friend from over eager zealots, yes. I know full well that the Chantry waited til that dim wit took over when I left to send you and Rolen. I also know both of you made it clear to Anders you were there to find any excuse to kill him. So the way I see it you pushed him into killing Rolen, if that is what really happened. I think they ran afoul of darkspawn and were killed. I saw the bodies and it looked like something decided to use him as a chew toy. Darkspawn like to bite and claw, but you wouldn't know much about that would you? I doubt you have battled them much being that you prefer the cowards way." If looks could kill Addler would have been dead by now. Anders had missed seeing his old commander in action. A swell of gratefulness rose in him and Justice hearing her dress down the Templar. Addler's eyes fell on Leigh and a wicked smile came to his face.

"Then I will leave, but that apostate will be coming with me." A feral snarl came from Anders and he stepped between the woman he loves and Addler. "It is my right as a Templar."

"She is Grey Warden prospect you have no right to her." Nathaniel pushed the Templar back and drew his dagger. "I suggest you leave now or we will make good on the promise Raven made and leave you here to rot."

"This is not over."

"Yes I think it is Addler. You are very outnumbered and out classed. The Chantry needs to learn there are certain places their laws do not reach. The Deep Roads is one of those places." Addler opened his mouth then shut it and stalked away. Once Raven was sure he was out of earshot she began laughing. "I swear when the Maker was passing out common sense he must have been off taking a piss."

"How he has survived this long is still a mystery to me. I was very happy not to find him on my roster when I was promoted."

"I bet Nate. Now to the other matter of a wayward Warden." Anders stiffened as Raven approached him. This time it was Leigh stepping in front of him and baring her teeth.

"I will not let you hurt him." A amused smile came to the painted woman's lips.

"I have no intentions of hurting him. We thought he was dead, killed by darkspawn." Anders put his hand on Leigh's shoulder and gave it a squeeze.

"It's alright love. I owe them an explanation." Leigh refused to move and even went as far as wrapping her arm around his waist possessively to keep him close.

"It looks like Sparklefingers has a girlfriend." The glare Anders shot Ogrhen would have killed a lesser man.

" Leave her out of this Ogrhen." The dwarf gave a hearty laugh and slapped Anders on the back.

"You always had a way with the ladies." Raven cleared her throat and unhooked her dagger belt letting it fall to the ground. Her hands went up in a sign of friendship.

"We thought you were dead Anders. What happened?" Anders drew in a ragged breath and tried to think of the words to explain what he had done, what Justice had done. He felt Leigh's lips touch his jaw before meeting his ear.

"I'm right here, tell them."

"I...Raven I never meant for this to happen. Justice was dying in Kristoff's body..."

"I don't understand Anders, we found Kristoff's body and returned it to his wife."

"I know, being stuck here in our world Justice would never be able to return to his unless he had a living host. I...Maker forgive me I couldn't let him die."

"You joined with Justice? That's why you ran?"

"No, I ran because what Addler said was true I killed Rolen and the other Wardens with him." A broken sob came from Anders as he fell to his knees. Leigh took his face in her hands kissing his forehead before holding him to her. The other Wardens looked appalled, but Raven had a sorrowful expression.

"Did Rolen attack you Anders?" His eyes lifted to his old commander's face.

"One of the new recruits followed me and Justice and saw what I did. They went and got Rolen who in turn brought a few of the others who seemed to be his friends. They surrounded me...and Justice came forth. He was trying to protect me, us, I had no control. Once it was done and we both calmed down I saw what we did and I couldn't face any of you after what I did. We were to ashamed." Raven knelt down next to him and placed her hand on his shoulder.

"If Rolen attacked you then it was his fault and the others that died are also his fault. He had it out for you from the beginning. I wish I had been there when he came to the Keep I would have had him thrown out on his arse. Being a Warden is not to be used to further the Chantry's laws. Wardens have always been outside the realm of normal law. You are one of us and Rolen broke his vow to maintain that brotherhood. You were helping a friend taking Justice into yourself."

"I..." Inside Anders' head he felt Justice's emotions, they matched his. Raven had risked a lot to conscript him and even more defending him against Rylock when she tried to take him away. She had excepted Justice for what he was and treated him with respect and dignity. The Commander was one of the few people in Thedas both of them respected. It hurt to think they disappointed her or worse lose her trust.

"I am not sure if Justice can hear me or not, but I am glad you both are alive."

"He can hear you Commander." Raven looked at Leigh and smiled. The way Anders held on to her and she to him reminded the commander of herself and Alistair.

"I am glad he found someone to take care of him. Anders was always a handful, but well worth it."

"He is still a handful, but that is one of the reasons why I love him." A memory flashed in Leigh's head as she looked at the other rogue's face. "I remember you from Ostagar, you and the other Warden stopped me and my brother from beating the piss out of a Templar."

"That was you? Maker I should have just let you kick is ass maybe it would have prevented him from causing all this trouble now."

"Wait...that was him?" Leigh's motioned to were Addler had slithered away to. The other woman nodded. "Now I wish I had. Carver wanted to tie him to a post and leave him for the darkspawn."

'After what he did to that mage I would not have blamed him. Alistair and I just did not want you two to have to fight the rest of the order stationed there."

"What did Addler do to a mage?" Anders could tell Leigh did not want to tell him.

"He...hurt her, badly. She was not much older than Bethany." The blue cracks started to form on his body. Leigh heard gasps from some of the other Wardens at the sight of him. Anders shook with rage and stood up.

"He will pay for what he did!" Justice's voice boomed through the cavern, he turned to storm after the Templar. Leigh ran and stood in his way pushing back on his shoulders.

"You can't Justice what if he wasn't alone? I will not lose both of you to the Templars. Please don't." Blue glowing eyes glared at her as he pushed her out of the way roughly. Leigh landed hard on her backside yelping in pain.

"Justice that is no way to treat a woman. I order you to stand down now!" Raven was right in front of him now her expression one of authority.

"He must pay for what he did Commander that girl deserves justice for his unspeakable act of cruelty."

"He will my friend, but not by you. I swear he will and you know full well I keep my promises, but as long as he works for the Chantry it has to be done cleanly. You do Anders and yourself no favors or the people you call friends."

"I...yes Commander." Nathaniel helped Leigh to her feet and Justice gave her a apologetic look. "I am sorry Hawke. I let our anger to get the better of me."

"It's fine, I understand believe me. I want him gone too, but your Commander is right, if he dies now they will continue to hunt us."

"Hawke? Your thee Hawke, Champion of Kirkwall?"

"It's just Hawke or Leigh if you prefer."

"If the tales are true then you deserve your title. You have done well despite the odds against you. Qunari are tough your lucky to be alive."

"It was close, but I had a good healer taking care of me." A ghost of a smile came to Anders face with Justice still in control. Sigrun walked up slowly to Justice giving him a quick hug.

"I missed you my friend." He smiled down at his friend realizing he had missed them more than he had thought possible. Sigrun and he had always got along.

"And I you Sigrun. I have missed all of you, as has Anders."

"Both of you will always have a place with us Justice." The blue began to fade and brown eyes returned. Anders took Leigh in his arms apologizing in hushed whispers. Leigh answered them with a loving kiss. Nathaniel and Raven shared a look both smiling. Someone had done what none of them had thought possible, tame Anders' heart.

"I am going to go check to see how Merrill is doing with Fenris. You need some time to talk with your friends."

"Thank you love, I will be along shortly." The other Wardens surrounded him as he watched her walk away toward Merrill and the others. "Maker I almost lost her today." A shiver of fear ran through him and he felt a hand on his shoulder. Nathaniel had a smirk on his face as he shook his head.

"You are one lucky son of a bitch you know that right? When we came up to that massacre we all thought you were dead. You really are like a cat with nine lives."

"If it had not been for Justice I would be dead. Rolen decided to use me as a new sheath for his sword. I should have come back and found at least one of you to let you know I was alive. All of you were the closest thing I had to family since I was taken to the circle."

"We are you family Anders and no matter what you have done we will be here for you."

"I do have a wonder Commander, why are you here?" Nathaniel crossed his arms over his chest while looking at his former commander.

"Well when I get a frantic visit from your wife and her grandmother saying you are over due to return home, I thought I better come get you. Shyira is due in less than a month and she would like the baby to at least get to know his father." Anders looked at Nathaniel in shock.

"You're going to be a father? Andraste's tits man what the hell are you doing down here risking your life?"

"It was a order from the First Warden believe me I had no planned to be here this long. As it is I will miss the birth since it will take me at least three weeks to get back to Denerim."

"Shy is here in Kirkwall."

"What? How?"

"She came with the King who is here to bring our countrymen home."

"Who is with your son them back home if you are both here?"

"Wynne and Eamon are watching over our son and probably spoiling him rotten."

"Maker I am gone for six years and you all have gone a reproduced. I guess congratulations are in order for both of you."

"It took a while for Alistair and I to be blessed with our son, but he was well worth the wait."

"At least you were in good hands with Wynne there." Raven nodded and watched the blue glow return to Anders' eyes and skin. "Commander I need to make a request of you. I have suppressed Anders conciseness so he does not hear what I have to ask. He is planning something that will set a war in motion to free the mages, but it will cost him everything. I know of the plan and I think it should be carried out, but there are somethings that can be prevented. You are the only ones I know that can pull this off."

"Tell me what he is planning and if it is in my power I swear I will help." Justice leaned in closer to the other Wardens to fill them in on their friend's plan.

Leigh made it to where the others were still holed up. Varric looked jumpy, but relieved to see her. His view had been blocked by the pile of darkspawn bodies that covered the cavern floor. Merrill was holding Fenris in her lap as she tried to bring him around. She had a relieved expression when she saw Leigh round the pillar.

"Thank the Creators your alright. Where is Anders?"

"He is talking to the Wardens. They needed to catch up. How is Fenris?"

"He is coming around albeit slowly. Are the darkspawn gone?"

"Their all dead Merrill. Here you need this back." Leigh handed the elf back her staff and sat down next to her. She was covered in blood and ash, her body ached from fighting for what seemed to be days. "I am never , ever coming back here again. Now I know why Anders hates the Deep Roads."

"Hawke can I ask how it is you can use magic?" Varric collapsed Bianca and slung her on his back.

"It is a very long story Varric which I will tell you, but not here. I am not ready for Fenris to know or anyone else for that matter."

"I understand Hawke, Broody would throw a fit if he knew since we all know how he feels about mages. I don't fancy having to stop him from putting a fist through your chest or Blondie's"

"I appreciate that Varric." A low groan came from Fenris as Merrill helped him sit up. "Welcome back, did you have a nice nap?"

"Did I miss all the fighting?" His voice sounded almost disappointed.

"Yeah you did, but we are all still alive that is the good news." Leigh hopped up to her feet and held out her hand to both the elves and helped them up. "Let's head over to the Wardens just in case there are more of those things down here."

"Sounds like a good idea." As they headed to meet up with the others Fenirs stopped dead. "What is Anders doing here?"

"He came looking for us, since he is a Grey Warden he knew what we would be up against and did not want to lose any of us. He was the one who got trampled by those two ogres."

"That should have killed him."

"The Warden healer is good at what she does. Come on you can give him dirty looks later when we are far from here."

"I do not give him dirty looks." Leigh tilted her head toward Fenris and barked a laugh. "Alright I do, but I know what he means to you. I might not like him , but I don't want him dead. I don't want to see you hurt Hawke." Her arm wrapped around and hugged his shoulder bring a rare smile to Fenris' face. The conversation they walked into was strange at best.

"Well at least you aren't wearing those girlie robes anymore."

"Mages wear robes Ogrhen. We really don't have much choice when we are in the Circle." Leigh's voice came from behind them and it sounded amused.

"What kind of robes did he use to wear?" Anders gave a warning glare to the dwarf, but it only helped spur him on.

"He wore this awful frilly thing with fur shoulders and bare arms. It was purple I think." Varric nearly fell over from laughter. Merrill tittered and covered her mouth to stop herself from laughing outloud. Ever Fenris had a amused look.

"Maker don't you know that archon robes just screams "I'm a mage come and get me". At least I never saw you in those things or I might not have been able to keep a straight face the first time I met you."

"Ogrhen I am going to kill you." The dwarf laughed as Anders chased after him yelling the entire time. Raven came up to Leigh's side shaking her head.

"Those two are worse than children sometimes, but it is nice to see a bit of the old Anders shining through. He looks so tired and worried."

"It has gotten worse these past few months. I had almost gotten him out of his self destructive phase, but recently he has thrown himself back into trying to free ever mage in Thedas. It is something I support since my sister is a mage and so was my father. I don't want to lose him to this. I love him too much."

"He is lucky to have you. Please know that if you ever want to come back to Ferelden you will be welcomed with open arms as will your friends."

"Thank you Warden Commander."

"Please call me Raven. I was asked to send this to you, but since you are here now here you go." Leigh took a letter from Raven and read it. She looked up with a quizzical expression.

"Why does the King want to see me?"

"You have a reputation here in Kirkwall. I am not sure how much you know about his rise to the throne, but he was a commoner too whose father just happened to be the late King Maric. He and you are not that dissimilar."

"I have heard that he is the common man's king. The refugees here have nothing but good things to say about him. I would be honored to meet him as would my friend Aveline. She also survived Ostagar."

"I will let him know that you will be coming to meet him."

"I guess we should stop them from killing each other huh?"

"Yes we should. I will get mine if you tackle yours."

"Deal." Both rogues ran to stop the mage and the warrior from killing each other. The cavern rang with laughter, taunts and annoyed yells. The group made their way back to the surface and parted ways. The Wardens headed a different way to Kirkwall. They had much to discuss and plan.

OoO

"Do you really think he is capable of doing what Justice said, Raven?"

"I am not willing to chance it Nate, we have to help him whether or not he knows we are. He is our brother, our friend and I will not lose him to this."

"I use to think he was a selfish prick, but the years have changed him, that woman has changed him."

"Yes she has. You and I both know what love can do to you and I honestly think he loves her with ever fiber of his being."

"So what are we going to do to pull this off?" Raven turned to her party and looked them all in the eye. They all knew that look and were prepared to do what ever it took to save their friend.

"Nate you are going back to Kirkwall with me so you can be with Shyira. I will let Alistair know what is going on. Sigrun I need you to find our friends from the assassin's guild they should be hiding out in Lowtown as well as finding the pirate Isabela. Tell her I sent you and that I need a favor. Have her meet me at the Viscount's Keep at night."

"Got it, what do you want me to tell the guild?"

"Tell Asha to find Nate and he will fill her in. None of you can be seen talking to these people. I don't want word getting out not with that sniveling idiot Addler lurking about. He most likely is allying himself with that fool Meredith."

"What about me and elf girl here? Are we just suppose to sit here with our thumbs up are arses?"

"No Ogrhen I have a task for you two as well. I have heard rumors a friend of ours is holed up on Sundermount. I need you two to go enlist his help as well. I know you and Zevran never truly got along, but his skills will be needed for this."

"Great we get to go drag back the knife happy fairy. Alright, come on Ve lets go take a stroll up the mountain."

"Be careful and take care of each other out there." Velanna pushed the dwarf in the direction they need to head and waved him along.

Yeah, yeah we'll behave ourselves. She never let's me have any fun anymore." Raven heard Ogrhen grumble til he disappeared around the bend of the road.

"We need to get back before Alistair has kittens."

"Then let's be off and pray we can do this before it is too late."

"Have some faith Nate. We have been in tighter spots before and came out alright."

"Yes, but this time it might be something we can't get ourselves out of once it happens." She could not argue with his logic since deep down she knew there was a chance this would not work, but ever the leader she was not about to let one of her friends down. She prayed to the Maker to give them the time they would need to put all the pieces into place, for Anders' sake as well as the sake of all who were now involved. She had seen enough carnage in her life to fill ten lifetimes and most of that was in her first year as a Warden. The thought of more made her blood run cold.

OoO

Kirkwall loomed ahead of them, it had taken nearly a week to get back. It would have been sooner, but they ran into some problems on the way. First of which was a raging storm that kept they holed up in a cave for a day, second a group of slavers who decided it would be a good idea to fight them. The last time Leigh had been this happy to see the City of Chains was after their last little trip to the Deep Roads six years prior.

"I need a stiff drink and to crawl into my bed in the Hanged Man for a week after all that. I can walk you home Daisy."

"That would be lovely Varric thank you."

"I will see you two tomorrow and yes Varric I will give you a blow by blow description of the fight since you could not see it where you were holed up." The dwarf smiled before taking Merrill's hand and walking her home. "Fenris do you need us to walk you back to your place?"

"I should be fine Hawke." He gave a small bow leaving Anders and Leigh to walk alone.

"I can't wait to get home and take a bath."

"Hmm, I might just have to join you."

"Well I do owe you for coming to my rescue and almost getting yourself killed by ogres, I guess I could spare some room in the tub." Anders rolled his eyes at her, but could not help the grin that had planted itself on his face. They had not had much time to really talk about what had happened down in the Deep Roads. Leigh had so many questions running through her head about his old life before she met him. Now was as good a time as any to start. "The other Wardens seemed more like a family than a group of soldiers. All the stories I had ever heard were they are all stoic."

"We were a very unique group. At first most of us hated each other, but none of us ever crossed Raven. She was the center for all of us. She knew how to get the most out of us without being a bitch about it. She saved my life more than once, I owe her a lot."

"I caught a little bit of her fighting when we were down there. She makes me look like a child with wooden daggers." Anders snickered seeing the deflated look on Leigh's face as she thought about his commander's fighting ability.

"She was assassin trained, your not so don't beat yourself up love." She sighed and leaned into him as they walked home.

"Why don't you talk about your time with the Wardens?" He stopped dead not knowing how to answer her. "It seemed liked they all were very happy to see you. I don't know if I would be able to just walk away from my friends like that."

"You heard what I did to that Templar, well what Justice and I did. I couldn't face them. I was afraid I would hurt them like I..." Her hand went to his cheek and he covered it with his own. "There is no way around it Leigh, I killed Rolen, not only killed him I ripped him apart and enjoyed it. He was a sodding bastard, but he did not deserve that." Leigh opened her mouth then closed it. Her normally bright eyes darkened and she stared at the ground.

"As someone who has personally killed a whole group of Templars, I am not one to judge. If it had been me in your shoes, I would have done what you and Justice did."

"But you killed yours with blades not magic and your bare hands." Her face flushed then went pale. She had never told him how she killed them, just that she did. "Leigh?"

"It's nothing. Just thinking." Horror spread across his face thinking she was upset about what he had done all those years ago. Leigh noticed and mentally kicked herself. "You did what you did to survive. He attacked you first Anders, as far as I am concerned you did nothing wrong so please stop beating yourself up about it." This brought a sigh of relief from him. "We need to go get cleaned up."

"Why the rush other than getting the grime off of us?"

"We have a audience with the King of Ferelden and I don't want to make a poor showing."

"He wants to see us, why?"

"I don't know, your commander gave me the letter that he wanted to see me."

"Then we best get cleaned up and make our way to wherever he wants to meet us." He looked down at his free hand and winced. It held the remnants of her old cloak. It was torn and half burnt, the dark ichor from the darkspawn stained it also. "I think you old cloak is a loss. I'm sorry." She took it from his hands and stared at it. He could see her eyes glass over with tears, but she did not let them fall. "This meant more than just being your favorite cloak didn't it?"

"Carver gave this to me right before we went to Ostagar."

"If I had known...I never would have use it. Leigh I am so sorry."

"It kept you safe while you were coming to get us. It is just a thing Anders, I have my memories and they can not be destroyed. Carver and I were always butting heads, but we always looked after one another."

"I wish I had been able to meet him and your father."

"Carver would have given you a hard time and my father...he would have made you work to prove you were worthy of me."

"So do I live up to what he would call worthy?"

"Yes you do and even if he did not approve I would still love you."

"Good to know." His lips brushed her forehead as they entered their estate. Tovis greeted them by jumping on both, a large paw on each of their shoulders. "Did you miss us?" A happy bark echoed in the main room as Anders scratched behind the hound's ear.

"Am I turning you into a dog person?"

"Not really, but he did endear himself to me when he defended me against Sebastian. I still prefer cats, no offense boy." The hound barked again and got down from his standing position. "See we have an understanding." Leigh walked up the stairs shaking her head and laughing. Anders followed after her ready to help her get their bath ready. As tired as he was he wanted to see what the King of Ferelden wanted from Leigh. He prayed it had nothing to do with him and what he did or was planning to do.


	17. Chapter 17

The Keep was buzzing with people when Leigh and her companions entered. Anders stood close to her since the place crawled with Templars. Varric's hand itched readying for anything. Three raised voices caught Leigh's attention, two armored people and one in skimpy leathers were deep in a loud conversation.

"We have to go after them Aveline. Hawke has been gone for too long." Sebastian looked like he would explode. Aveline rolled her eyes and stopped in the middle of the stair way.

"I don't even know where they went. They could be anywhere. None of us went with them the last time, so how pray tell do you expect me to find them?" Isabela just watched the two volley words back and forth. Her eyes drifted around the main room of the Keep and landed on Leigh. A wry smile graced her lips as she pushed in between the two arguers and headed to were she stood.

"Hawke it is about bloody time you got back. It has been right boring here without you." The rogue gave her friend a quick hug and a peck on the cheek, before Leigh was crushed by a armored body. Leigh heard Anders growl from behind her, but the vice grip embrace she was in made it hard to turn her head let alone breath. "Hey don't crush the poor woman, let her at least say hello to all of us first." Sebastian blushed and let Leigh go.

"I am happy to see you all too. Sorry it took us so long to get back, we ran into some complications."

"Where are Fenris and Merrill?" Isabela's voice was laced with concern. Leigh knew why, she had a thing for Fenris and was very protective of Merrill.

"They are home resting, both are fine." The rogue blew out a sigh of relief and put her devil may care face back on. "Aveline I am glad I caught you here, I was told to meet the King of Ferelen and I want you there with me."

"I had heard he was here, but I have yet to see him. Why does he want to see you?"

"I have no idea, but who I am to refuse. He is our king." Aveline smiled at her and nodded in agreement.

"I thought I was the only one who still felt like Ferelden would always be their home."

"I will always be a Ferledan. It is in my blood and bone. One day I want to return, but for now Kirkwall needs me more, plus my family is here and I will not abandon any of you." Leigh threw her arms over both Anders and Isabela's shoulders and smiled. "Now I just have to figure out who the King is and talk to him." Anders scanned the room and found the king standing off to the side with a few people around him. One he recognized as Shyira, Nathaniel's now wife and she was very heavy with child.

"He is right over there love. We should go and get this over with." The group made there way to where King Alistair was standing talking in hushed tones to his adviser. He noticed the small crowd moving toward them and raised his hand to silence the conversation.

"Hello King Alistair, my name is Leigh Hawke. I was told that you wanted to meet with me." She gave the appropriate bow which he returned with a smile.

"It is nice to meet you Champion of Kirkwall. I do indeed want to meet the woman who clawed her way up from nothing to become one of the most respected person in all of Kirkwall."

"I have done what I thought was right Your Majesty."

"Then you have done more than most will ever do in a lifetime." Aveline knelt down in front of the king bowing her head.

"It is an honor to meet with you Your Majesty. I was at Ostagar, as was Hawke. What we faced was there was horrible, but I am glad you survived."

"Thank you as am I. The man responsible has paid for his crimes." Alistair stared at Hawke trying to recall if he had seen her at Ostagar. He could not find her face in the ocean of faces he had seen there. "So you were at Ostagar as well?"

"Yes, I was a scout and spent most of my time in the Wilds dodging darkspawn, but I do remember seeing you there. You had to wrestle my brother to the ground to stop him from beating a Templar to a bloody pulp."

"Now I remember you. My friend stopped you from doing the same."

"Yes she did."

"Is your brother here with you?" Leigh's face turned sad and she shook her head.

"He died when we were trying to flee Lothering."

"I am truly sorry."

"So Alistair is is true what they all say, is it good to be the King?" Isabela gave a smug smile and winked at him.

"Why I am not surprised to see you here Isabela. It has been a long time."

"Very long if I remember, how is your blushing bride?" Leigh could have sworn she saw the king blush for a split second. She was a little shocked to see that Isabela knew him.

"Quite well as far as I know." His eyes turned to Anders who gave a very quick nod and a small sigh of relief escaped his lips. "So what are you doing in Kirkwall?"

"I am following this crazy woman." The pirate play punched Leigh in the shoulder and giggled.

"Watch that one she will steal you blind in Wicked Grace."

"Hey, I only do that to teach you a lesson and it was only that one time." Alistair snickered at Isabela, but his face turned serious when he saw someone stalking toward them. "_Meredith is coming." "I thought I felt evil heading this way." "She is not in a good mood." "Is she ever Pash?" _When Pash did not answer Leigh knew Meredith was right behind her. She spun around and could see the Knight Commander was seething.

"What is the meaning of this?" In her hand she held what looked to be a missive with Ferelden's royal seal on it.

"I thought I worded it quite plainly Knight Commander."

"I will not help a country who lets fugitive mages in so they can hide. At least five have done just that this past month alone. You call yourself a Maker fearing man yet you let this happen."

"Unlike you I do not see blood mages in ever shadow Meredith. Those fugitives you speak of were native Fereldans who returned to Kinloch Hold as soon as they landed. I requested to have our mages back and was denied. The ones who have returned do not have kind words about the Gallows or their keepers."

"You dare insult me here, I should have you tossed out on your royal ass for this. You should be grateful I took in your mages and ignore the fact that you have an apostate here with you now." Leigh stiffened and looked to Anders. She put her hands on her daggers and prepared to fight if she had to.

"Shyira here is a Keeper of the Dalish clan in Ferelden. Her clan helped stop the Blight or it would have spread even here to Kirkwall. You should be thanking her not threatening her." The jovial king that had been in front of them moments ago was now visibly angry. He put himself between Meredith and the elf hoping to dissuade the Templar from trying anything.

"Her position carries no weight here. She is an apostate and belongs in the Circle." The gravelly voice from behind them made Meredith jump and reach for her sword.

"She is the wife of a Grey Warden and not subject to anyone's rule Knight Commander." Nathaniel stormed up and stood almost nose to nose with Meredith. His face was twisted with rage. "I dare you to try to take her and my unborn child from me Templar." Alistair put his hand on Nathaniel's shoulder and pulled him back.

"Easy Nate, she won't. She knows full well that she can't." Nathaniel backed up and went to hold his wife.

"You are just as much a fool as your late brother was. I have no time for fools. You will not receive the help you asked for here."

"My, my I was lead to believe Kirkwall was more hospitable than this. I guess I heard wrong." Another voice, this time airier, but no less angry. Leigh saw a woman dressed in regal splendor standing behind Isabela. "As I have heard Knight Commander your tenure as Viscount has been rather embarrassing for Kirkwall. Do you think it wise for you to stay in power when the Chantry is not to be ruling over the commonwealth like this?"

"This is going to be fun." Isabela whispered in Leigh's ear and giggled. "She will rip that bitch to shreds just with words."

"And you would be?"

"Queen Ashlyn Therin."

"Then you are this fool's wife, how proud you must be." Ashlyn smiled politely thought her dark blue eyes shined with rage. She glided right up to the Templar and stared her in the eye.

"My husband is no fool, you are the foolish one. The harder you press the mages the worst Kirkwall is becoming. Your pride is hurting the very people you claim to be protecting. We have no such problems in Ferelden since the Tower has been made more open. It has be made so families can come visit their kin, true the mages are not allowed to leave, but it has made it easier on them to be able to see the people they were ripped away from. Maybe you should try acting like a person instead of a self righteous tart and just maybe you will see that what you are doing is wrong." Meredith's eyes went wide and her nostrils flared like those of a raging bull.

"I... ..I will not stand here and be belittled by the likes of you." With that she stormed back to the Viscount's office leaving the Queen with a smirk on her face.

"Sorry my husband, but I could not take her calling you a fool." Alistair took her hands in his and kissed her cheek.

"That was quite alright, it was well worth the sight of her struck speechless."

"You always knew how to back someone off without kicking their arse Ash."

"Isabela, how are you?" Ashlyn gave the pirate a tight hug while Varric and Leigh exchanged confused glances. "When I heard the Siren's Call was lost on the coast I had feared you were gone."

"Lucky for me I can swim."

"Yes lucky indeed." Ashlyn gazed at the group in front of her and spotted someone she had not seen since she was little, but there was no mistaking who he was. "Sebastian Vael it has been a very long time."

"I'm sorry My Lady, but my memory is bad. You say you know me?"

"Maybe this name will ring a bell, Ashlyn Cousland."

"Maker's mercy, yes, but the last time I saw you we were both very young. How is your brother Fergus?"

"He is doing well. Being the Teryn of Highever keeps him very busy. I was saddened to hear about your family. If there is anything you need when you take back Starkhaven please let me know. We don't have much right now, but I know full well what it is like to have to take your homeland back from traitorous snakes."

"Thank you, I have not yet decided if I want to take the throne back in Starkhaven yet. I am not sure if I have the right."

"I have told you this before Sebastian, you do have the right and you would be a good ruler."

"Thank you Hawke, I...I will think about it." Ashlyn could see the look the prince was giving Leigh and she made a mental note of it. She also made note of Anders reaction to the prince.

"So Serah Hawke, it is nice to put a face to the name our people have been talking about these past three years. You have done well for yourself and for your fellow countrymen. We thank you for that. Ferelden has a long road to go in recovering from the Blight."

"I do not see myself as a hero Your Majesty. I just have done what I was taught by my father. Help those who need it, and act with grace."

"Your father was a wise man. Is there anything that you need from us, as I told Sebastian we do not have much in the way of supplies, but what ever we can do within our powers we will do."

"The only request I would have I am not sure is in your power Your Majesty. My sister is in the Gallows and I would like for her to be transferred to the Circle in Ferelden, as well as Knight Captain Cullen. I know she will be far safer there than here. I fear for her while she is under Meredith's control."

"I understand and I will petition the Grand Cleric on your behalf. Elthina is a reasonable woman, I am sure I can see it done."

"Thank you Your Majesty. I will in your debt if you can." Leigh bowed, but Ashlyn put her hand on her shoulder to stop her. Leigh looked up into the queen's eyes and saw that she had seen those eyes before. The Warden Commander had the same eyes. She gave the queen a questioning look and was answered by a wink.

"You and I are a lot alike Hawke. We both know what it is like to fight for our land and our family. Nothing is more important than that. I have something to ask of you if I may?"

"Anything."

"Watch over your friends, protect what is yours and please remember you will always have a home in Ferelden when ever you need it."

"I will, thank you."

"Nathaniel I think it is time to get your lovely wife back to the inn to rest. It was a pleasure meeting all of you and may the Maker watch over you all." Nathaniel clapped a hand on Anders shoulder and smiled.

"Stay out of trouble old boy and I hope that I will be able to see you soon."

"I will try Nate. If you are staying in Kirkwall until your baby is born I am sure you will." Shyira took Leigh's hands and beamed at her.

"Thank you for returning my husband to me serah. I can never repay you for this."

"You never have to. It was a pleasure to meet him and help him come home to you. Congratulations on your little one."

"Ma serannes, lethallan."

"Come my dear you need to get off your feet. See you around Hawke." Nathaniel lead his wife out of the Keep followed closely by the king's advisers. Alistair held his arm out to his wife and she took it gracefully. Once they were out of the Keep he saw a look on Ashlyn's face he knew well. It was the look she use to get before a mission during the Blight, so he stopped walking and cupped her chin in his hand.

"What is wrong my love?"

"We have a problem and Anders is right in the middle of it, but I don't want to speak of it out here in the open. There is no knowing if Meredith has eyes and ears around."

"I thought he was dead."

"The blonde man standing next to Hawke, that was him. He pulled a Wynne, but with Justice."

"Andraste's flaming sword what possessed him to do that?" Ashlyn shook her head and laughed. "What is so funny, Ash really this is serious?"

"What possessed him? Really Alistair that was not one of your better lines." In spite of himself he laughed realizing what he had said. "He was helping a friend, but somehow his anger toward the Circle and the Chantry warped Justice into Vengeance. At least that is what Justice told me."

"I need a drink, I hope Ogrhen gave you some of his special brew."

"I have some yes, let us be off then so I can fill you in."

"I am glad you made it back to me in one piece love, I hate not being able to watch your back anymore."

"I know, I miss having you with me, but a Warden's job is never done. You have responsibilities now that can not be ignored."

"It doesn't help me not worry. I was hoping that when the Archdemon died we could just grow old together without worrying about all this again."

"We will, but right now one of our brothers needs us and I will not abandon him."

"There you go being all noble again, making me love you even more."

"I love you too and I can't wait to get out of these damned clothes. Now I know why I always preferred wearing my leather armor to wearing finery."

"I can help you with those clothes." Alistair flashed a lecherous grin before taking his lady's hand and leading her back to the royal ship.

OoO

"So that was the King and Queen of Ferelden. I will have to say they are a refreshing change from the stuck up nobles around here." Varric mused as they headed out of the Viscount's Keep. He, Aveline and Leigh walked together ahead of the others. Isabela and Anders were deep in conversation and Sebastian looked deep in thought.

"They did seem to be too good to be true, didn't they?"

"Yes Red they did, but if it helps get Sunshine out of the Gallows I won't knock it." Aveline gave a nod and turned to Hawke.

"So how were the Deep Roads?"

"Oh you know full of darkspawn, large spiders and rotting corpses. A perfect place to have a romantic lunch."

"Hawke your horrible."

"Sorry Aveline, I am tired, sore and a little punchy. I am happy to be back here in the sunshine and somewhat fresh air."

"We are happy to have you back. If you were gone any longer Sebastian would have stormed after you, though we had no idea where you were. When Bodahn told me Anders went after you I feared the worst."

"I am sorry I worried all of you."

"Just don't do it again or I swear Starkhaven won't have an heir because I will end up strangling Sebastian."

"How long did he pester you?"

"Everyday after the first week." Leigh rolled her eyes and shook her head.

"Maker, I love him like a brother, but he sometimes doesn't get it does he? I'm not fragile or stupid, I can take care of myself."

"He loves you Hawke, even after you told him to back off. I know you told me not to act like the protective big sister, but there are times I want to smack some sense into the boy." Leigh rubbed her forehead to try to stem the headache that was now creeping up on her.

"How do I get it through his thick skull that I can't be with him? I love Anders and yes I do love Sebastian too, but it is not the same type of love."

"It is his problem not yours. He will either respect your wishes or you might have to send him away."

"I don't know if I can do that."

"You might have to Hawke, I hope you don't for your sake, but be prepared is all I am saying." Leigh sighed and the pounding in her head became worse. She wanted to lay down in her nice soft bed and draw the curtains. She looked back at the others who were trailing behind and caught Sebastian staring at her. She was thankful Isabela had Anders full attention or it could get ugly really quick. She slowed her pace and let everyone else get ahead of her and the prince.

"You look deep in thought Sebastian. What's wrong?"

"I...it is nothing Hawke, just thinking."

"Out with it Vael. What's on your mind?"

"Just thinking about Starkhaven and what both you and Ashlyn said. I keep waiting for a sign from the Maker to tell me what I should do. I feel lost."

"Maybe the Maker wants you to make your own decision on what you want to do with your life. I still stand by the fact I think you would make a good ruler. Your fair, kind, but shrewd enough not to be taken advantage of. You are a rogue after all. I have heard some tales of your wild days, most of them from your own mouth. You do yourself no good by turning your back on your past and your birthright."

"Is there nothing in your past you wish you could forget?"

"Your asking if I have regrets, yes I do. I have learned from those regrets and do not let them hold me back. You are not the boy that went through life doing whatever and whoever you want anymore. You have grown up and yes the Chantry helped with that, but if you had wanted to stay that same selfish boy you would have."

"You sound like the Grand Cleric."

"She is a wise woman and she cares for you very much."

"And I for her, as I care for you. She did ask that when you returned if you had time to come talk to her."

"Do you think it is something that can't wait?"

"I am not sure. I know she wanted both of us there. It has something to do with a letter she received from the Divine, that is all I know."

"Then we should not delay. I will have Varric make sure Anders gets home safe and I will go with you to the Chantry."

"I will wait for you over there then. See you soon Hawke."

"Anders."

"Sorry love, what is it?"

"The Grand Cleric wants to see me and you need to check on the clinic. They must be going crazy without you."

"Why does she want to see you?" His eyes narrowed with suspicion at the thought of her going to the Chantry alone.

"It is most likely someone needs my help and she is going to fill me in on it."

"I don't like it." Her hand brushed his cheek trying to quell his unease. His posture relaxed a little, but his expression did not.

"You make it sound like I am walking into the lion's den."

"More like a snake pit."

"Anders, really Elthina has been nothing but kind to me, even after I trashed the place when they took Beth. If she needs me to do something to help someone I will. Plus it might help grease the wheels to get my sister out of the Gallows and back to Ferelden. She will be far safer there than here."

"Your right love, I'm sorry I guess I am just overtired from all the traveling and fighting."

"I promise I won't be long and I won't disappear again without make sure you know where I am going before I leave."

"I appreciate that. I will take the passage way from our home to the clinic. It is safer that way. I hope not to be long."

"Alright, I will be along soon." She stood on her toes and gave him a lingering kiss. He broke it too soon for her liking, his eyes had lost more of the light they use to have. She made a mental note to speak to him about what was bothering him when they were alone again. She watched him walk away, his walk was heavy like a man who had the weight of the world on his shoulders. When he vanished from her sight Leigh went to join Sebastian. He saw the worried expression on her face even though she smiled at him.

"What's wrong Hawke?"

"It's nothing just worried about Anders he is not acting like himself lately."

"He does seem to have a lot on his mind."

"Hmm." Leigh tipped her hand to signal Sebastian to start walking.

"It is not my place to say anything, but he is foolish to treat you the way he does."

"I really do not want to go into this again please. I know you hate him Sebastian."

"I don't hate him Hawke, I just don't think he is right for you. Your life is in danger everyday you are with him."

"He is worth the risk." Sebastian blew out a ragged breath and bit his lip. There was so much he wanted to say. He knew if he did he would lose her and that was something he did not want. He only nodded and faked a smile. The Grand Cleric was waiting for them when they arrived.

"Ah Serah Hawke, thank you for coming so quickly."

"It is my pleasure Your Grace."

"I would not normally bother anyone with something like this, but your influence in Kirkwall is well known to both sides."

"Both sides?"

"The mages and the Templar, also those have taken sides are looking to people they trust. From what I have been hearing most trust you."

"I make no secret of what side I have chosen. My sister is a mage and I fear for her safety while she is in the Gallows."

"I know dear, the thing I ask of you and Sebastian is to meet with a agent of the Divine. She is here in Kirkwall to see if action is called for against the city."

"What, why?" Sebastian and Leigh yelled in unison. Elthina held up her hand to quiet them enough to continue.

"The situation here is almost at a boiling point. The Divine wants to make sure it does not go that far by any means necessary. I would like both of you to convince the agent that drastic measures do not have to be taken. I do not want the people here to suffer, any of them.

"You don't think the Divine would attack Kirkwall without provocation?"

"That is why I ask this of the two of you. Each of you sees one side of the debate and I am sure that working together you can stem this."

"When are we to meet this agent?"

"Tonight in the throne room of the Viscount's Keep. The door has been locked since the Qunari murdered Dumar, but I am sure between the two of you it will not be a problem."

"Your Grace?"

"Use the skills you acquired before you came to us Sebastian, I am sure they are not that rusty." Leigh laughed as her friend's face turned a distinct shade of crimson from Elthina's words.

"As you wish. I will meet you tonight after dark at the Keep Hawke. You should go home and rest."

"I will see you then. Good day Your Grace." Leigh bowed and left Sebastian with Elthina.

"If you stare at her with any more intensity my boy I think she will burst into flames."

"I...Maker forgive me, I can't help it."

"I am not blind Sebastian, I know you love her, but isn't she pledged to another?"

"She is, but he does not deserve her. He is a apostate and her fame will only protect her for so long. If the Divine truly does marched against Kirkwall I fear she will try to protect the mages and kill herself in the process. If that happens I will never forgive myself."

"Sebastian, she is well aware of the dangers her choices. She and I have talked at length on them. She feels this man is worthy of her, that he completes her. Hawke is a very compassionate person. She has seen the best and the worst of magic, and her faith in those around her who weld it has never wavered. She shows a strength that could be measured against our Lady Andraste. She cares for you very much, but she can not change her heart and neither can you. Do not push her to become something she is not. You will end up losing her, be thankful you have her as a friend and confidant. That is a blessed thing to have."

"I...I understand Your Grace. I must go and pray for guidance and forgiveness."

"Desire can be a wonderful thing Sebastian, but it can also twist a person til they forget why they wanted the thing they covet. Do not let it twist you." He bowed and headed back to his room. Once he was alone Sebastian threw himself on his bed and tried hard to ease the pain that his heart was in. Leigh's face kept flashing in his mind and he growled in frustration. He rolled off the bed and fell to his knees to pray. He prayed for the pain to ease, for him to be able to just be Hawke's friend and not want anything more than that. He prayed to make the hate for Anders fade. He could not lose her to his own pride and desire. He also did not want to lose her to the violence he was sure was coming.

OoO

"Behind you!" Leigh heard a stifled scream as a lightning bolt hit Sebastian square in the back. He collapsed into a smoking heap at her feet. The mages who attacked them surrounded her. "Why are you doing this? I am on your side, but this in not the way to prove you should be free."

"We know you are here to talk to the agent of the Divine, don't lie to us Champion. You sit in your mansion while we have to hid and fear for our lives. We will not stand aside anymore."

"You are just making things worse for the mages still stuck in the Gallows. Your actions are not helping."

"You know nothing about being a mage. We should be the ones in charge not them."

"Your wrong, I know more about being a mage than you know." The blood mage just gave a dark laugh and shot his hand out at her. A blast of cold hit her threatening to freeze her solid had she not ignited a fire spell around her. The mages took a few steps back in shock. "Now stand down I don't want to have to hurt any of you." The leader did not heed her warning and attacked with a lightning spell. Leigh held out her palm and drew a shield over her and Sebastian's limp form. She stepped out of the shield and drew her daggers.

"The pious Serah Hawke is nothing but a blood mage acting like a average person. You will pay for siding against your own kind." Before he could speak his next spell a dagger slit his throat. He had been so busy talking that he didn't see her move at breakneck speed at him. The other mages never stood a chance either. She made short work of them. Her body quaked with anger and sorrow for having to kill them, but they gave her no choice. Leigh fell to her knees next to Sebastian after she finished the last of the mages off. She was so busy trying to bring him back around that she did not noticed two more mages sneaking up on her. The sick wet sound of blades going into their throats made her wheel around blades drawn.

"Peace friend, you must be Serah Hawke." The red haired woman in front of her gave Leigh a warm smile.

"And you would be the agent of the Divine."

"You may call me Sister Nightingale or Leliana if you prefer. I knew they would try to kill me, but I was not expecting for them to turn on you."

"Well they did. So you set me up?"

"No I wanted them to find only me here, but you came earlier than I was expecting. I am sorry."

"I am use to it by now. If it isn't one side trying to kill me it's the other."

"Is Brother Vael...?"

"No he is alive just knocked out. It is nothing that I can't fix."

"If you are sure?" Leigh nodded and stood up to face Leliana. "You must try to persuade Elthina to leave Kirkwall and go to Orlias. She is not safe here anymore."

"So the Divine thinks that Kirkwall is a lost cause."

"Not yet, but if things do not improve she will do what must be done."

"Is there no other way? The people here have been through enough."

"It is not my choice."

"There has to be a way to prevent all out war. If Meredith can be taken out of power things might die down enough for talks to open up and both sides to find peace. As long as she stays in power this place is always going to be in danger of all out war."

"Meredith is a devote member of the faith."

"She is also bat shit nuts. She squeezes the mages and they fight back. It is a vicious cycle. It has to stop. She thinks she is doing what is best, but she has lost sight of her humanity."

"I can see you have chosen your side. If you care for Elthina beg her to leave. I fear she will try to stand between both sides and lose her life in the process. I have pressing matters elsewhere. Maker watch over you Serah Hawke."

"You too." She did not watch the sister leave. Her concern was Sebastian and how she was going to get him to his feet and get him out of there. He was far larger than herself and his armor made him even heavier. "_There is someone else here hiding in the shadows Leigh." "Great, hostile?" "No, but if you would let me deal with him it will be less messy." "Have fun I am tired of all this right now. Just do me a favor when your done help me with Sebastian." "As you wish."_ Leigh let Pash take over and her conscience slipped into a deep sleep. "You can come out Anders she is sleeping." He stepped out of the shadows , but kept his distance.

"What is she doing here?"

"She came on the request of the Grand Cleric. We wanted a peaceful resolution to this, but the mages would not listen."

"I saw."

"And yet you did not come out of hiding to help her, I wonder why?"

"I didn't want her to see me working with blood mages."

"I see, you are walking a dangerous line Anders. You should tell her what you are doing instead of leaving her in the dark. She has a stake in this too."

"I have to keep her safe. The less she knows the better." Pash could only look at him sadly. She knew better than anyone what he was planning and she also knew all to well what it would cost him.

"If she lost you she will not be safe. Her rage and sorrow would consume her and there would be nothing I could do to stop it. She would bring this city to it's knees before anyone could stop her. You have not seen her at her most powerful, it is terrible to behold."

"She told me she had never really used her magic until after her battle with the Arishok."

"She is ashamed of what she did, but she did tell you part of it. The Templars that hurt her father paid for what they did a hundred times over." Anders flinched at Pash's words. "After she had done it she vowed never to let herself become that person again. I have helped her as much as I could, but with us fused as we are it is hard to see where she ends and I begin. Just as it is for you and Justice, strong emotions make normal people do things they normally would not, but for us it is different. Those emotions change us into demons or as close to demons as we can get."

"I can't stop this, it has already been set in motion."

"Then tell her before it is too late. She will understand."

"No she won't. It breaks my heart to hurt her, but this is more important than me, than her. It has to do with every mage in Thedas."

"I understand, but I am not sure she will." The red light dimmed a little in her skin. "Aveline is coming. Let me do the talking."

"What, she doesn't know about you..."

"Hawke! What is going on in here?" The guard captain's eye scanned the throne room and made not of the dead mages. Anders opened his mouth to speak, but the sound of Leigh's voice cut him off. He saw the red was gone from her skin, but he knew Pash was still in control.

"The Grand Cleric asked Sebastian and I to meet with a Agent of the Divine. The meeting was set for here, but it seems these mages thought I was the agent. With all that is going on in Kirkwall they are combative against everyone ever the ones who are on their side. They attacked, knocked Sebastian out and I killed them."

"Flames! And what are you doing here Anders?"

"He was our back up just in case. I told him to stay hidden unless I really needed help." Aveline stared at him and he nodded going along with the lie. "The agent told us that the Divine has her sights on Kirkwall if things get any worse."

"That is all we need. I swear this place has gone to the Void in a hand basket since Dumar died."

"I agree, Meredith has to be removed from power."

"If only we could, but we would need a strong noble to take her place." Aveline knelt down next to Leigh and checked Sebastian. "Anders you should check him over and make sure he is alright. I will clear the main room of the keep in ten minutes. I expect you all to be gone by that time."

"We will be thanks Aveline." Pash waited for her to be gone to let the glow return. "Do you want to heal him or should I?"

"I'll do it, I don't want to take the chance he sees you using magic. Leigh was lucky in the Deep Roads that Fenris knocked out so she didn't have to try to explain."

"Then I will let her take back over."

"How will we explain me being here?"

"She did leave you a note telling you where she was going. I guess you did not get it."

"I haven't been home yet since this morning."

"I suggest you start spending more time there if I were you. She is starting to worry you are going to leave her one day and never return."

"I...I will try." He started to heal the prince and Pash receded back into Leigh's mind. He felt her hands on his back and could not help from smiling.

"I see you got my note."

"Yes I did and I swear you get into trouble when I am not around."

"I don't mean to. I tried to talk them out of it."

"I know you did love, I came in after the last one fell. I stayed hidden because of the Chantry agent."

"I don't blame you at all. I wish I hadn't been here either." A groan told them both Sebastian was coming around. He blinked a few times and let his vision clear.

'Hawke, Anders? Maker what happened?"

"Someone turned you into a lightning rod my friend, but lucky you did not take the full brunt of it. I left Anders a note to where I was going and he showed up right after the agent left."

"What did she say?"

"That the Divine is watching Kirkwall and it is not good. She is preparing to march against us if the situation gets any worse. She told me we have to convince Elthina to leave and go to Orlias. She is not safe here."

"Maker have mercy, we should tell her right away."

"First we make sure your okay, then we can go."

"He's fine Leigh, the spell did very little damage."

"Thank you Anders."

"Your welcome Sebastian. Leigh I will meet you at home." He held his hand out to the prince helping him off the floor then turned to Leigh and did the same. He pulled her a little harder and slammed her into him before giving her a bruising kiss. He knew it was cruel to kiss her in front of Sebastian, but a small part of him liked seeing the pain on the prince's face. "I'll be waiting for you." Leigh's face flushed and she felt dizzy from the kiss.

"I...I'll be home soon." She blew out a long breath and watched him leave. "_I hate it when he does that. I can't think straight afterwords."_ "_I think that was his point." "I know, but Maker, he drives me crazy." _All Leigh could hear was a rolling laughter from Pash in her head. The kiss had made her forget Sebastian was standing there with her til he cleared his throat.

"We should go see Elthina." He stalked past her and she had to run to catch up. The set of his jaw told her he was upset so she kept quiet. The walk to the Chantry did not take long and she waited patiently as Sebastian went to find the Grand Cleric. Once she was in front of both of them they told her about the Divine's plans. After hearing they wanted her to leave her flock behind and leave Elthina chided them and refused to leave. Sebastian's eyes pleaded with Leigh to make Ethina see reason, but she knew it was no use. Pash told her the Grand Cleric was not leaving no matter who asked her to. She would not leave her people to this war to suffer without her.

"I am Grand Cleric and my word is final Sebastian. My fate will be the same as my flock if that is the Maker's will." She left them both to return to her chambers. Sebastian balled his hands in tight fists and growled in frustration.

"If this comes to war she will be ripped apart and yet she will not leave."

"It is her choice. She is not a fool, she knows what it means."

"If she is not leaving neither am I. Starkhaven be damned, it can wait. I will be here to shield her from the mages."

"What do you mean shield her from the mages?"

"It is their fault, if they would just see reason..." His words were cut off by a hard slap.

"It is not all their fault! Fault lies with both sides Sebastian. Tell me this if it was you or someone you loved would you want to be locked up and treated like they are. I am not saying how they are going about it is right, but I understand. I would be fighting if it were me. If there was any way to get my sister out of that shit hole I would. I hate the fact it has come to this, but Meredith is making it worse. She needs to be stopped and her power over Kirkwall striped." He rubbed his cheek and smiled in spite of the pain.

"Why don't you become the Viscount, or should I say Viscountess."

"You can't be serious."

"I am, you see both sides and are respected by many on both sides. Your compassionate, but tough, I think you would do well."

"How pray tell do I go about doing this? I know nothing of politics and ruling a city."

"Leave that to me. I remember enough about it to help you."

"I don't know about this Sebastian."

"It will get Meredith out of power and hopefully appease the mages enough to get them to open communications and stop hurting people. It is a win, win situation." The hope in his eyes softened her positions against trying to dissuade him from his plan.

"Alright, but not today. I need to go home and sleep."

"I will talk to the nobles on your behalf and get their support. Rest well Hawke."

"I hope this works or both of our names will end up being mud."

"Have faith."

"Your faith in me is enough. Thank you Sebastian."

"Your welcome." Leigh could only shake her head as she left the Chantry. Her mind raced at the thought of being the leader of Kirkwall. If it would help cool the mounting tensions in the city it would be worth it. She could protect Anders and Merrill even get her sister out of the Gallows possibly. Filled with both hope and dread she ran to her home. Seeing Anders waiting for her at the top of the stairs made her feel better. His long absent warm smile was there as he held out his hand for her. The spark in his eyes was also back. Before she could tell him anything he swept her off her feet and carried her to their bed room. All thoughts of being the Viscountess washed away when he kissed her. Sleep would have to wait, as would anything else. It was rare for them to be able to to catch a moment for themselves. It was rarer still for him to show signs of his old self.

"So are you all mine today?" He gave her an amused smirk.

"I am."

"Good lock the door and get your clothes off."

"My we are a bit forward today."

'Shut up Anders and get over here."

"Since you asked so nicely..."


	18. Chapter 18

The dreams were always the same. Fighting, death, and then fire. Leigh woke up in a cold sweat as she always did after those dreams. Of late she had been waking up alone, but this time she felt arms wrap around her. She leaned herself back into warmth those arms gave her. In moments like these she could pretend nothing was wrong. That she wasn't losing him to his cause or to Justice. She wanted to freeze time right here and never let it start again. In these most private of moments he was still her Anders. Not the abomination that everyone feared he was or the apostate hunted by Templar and Wardens alike. He was gentle and kind, everything she needed and wanted. She knew full well this will not last. She was losing him to everything and could not stop it.

"Another bad dream?" She nodded and drew a thin breath.

"It is always the same. It always ends in fire."

"They are just dreams love. I will never let anything happen to you." She smiled and twisted a little in his arms so she could see his face. His hair had come undone in the night's activities. She loved how it framed his face coming just to his chin. Her finger twisted in that hair and pulled him down to meet her lips.

"I know you won't. I just wish they would stop. I am afraid to sleep sometimes, because I know most mornings you won't be here to comfort me."

"Leigh...I want to be here, but..." Her fingers touched his lips to silence him.

"I know you can't tell me what you are doing or where you go. I understand, but it does not help ease my fear." She sat up and untangled herself from his grip. She got out of bed and went to the window to see the moon still hanging high in the night sky. She heard him get out of bed and felt the heat of him behind her, but she did not turn around. "I was thinking of leaving this place to my cousin and heading back to Ferelden. I want you to come with me."

"You would leave the others, your sister?"

"I'm not sure how much fight I have left in me Anders. Sebastian wants me to become the Viscountess and bring peace back to Kirkwall. I'm not sure I can."

"When did this happen?"

"Yesterday after the meeting with the agent of the Divine. He said it would be a perfect solution. Meredith would be gone and the mages would settle down. I am not so sure about either happening. Meredith might step down, but she will go right back to the Gallows and continue what she is doing now, just with less power. The mages would see this as nothing more than more empty promises. This is so frustrating!"

"What do you want to do?"

"What I want is to live a simple life with the man I love and forget about all this. But I know I can't and it kills me." She could not help the fat, hot tears from falling. Anders stood there helpless. He had caused these tears and he knew he would cause more before this was through. She turned around and buried her head in the crook of his neck. Her tears soaked his skin, but he didn't care.

"Shhh, love please don't cry. I'm sorry." His words sounded hollow even to him. He was sorry he was hurting her, but the cause he was fighting for was for both of them. If he could somehow bring freedom to all mages it would be worth it. Her sobs died out and she clung to him like he was going to vanish in a wisp of smoke if she eased her grip.

"You warned me, and I didn't listen. You told me over and over again you would break my heart and I thought I could stop it from happening. How foolish am I?" He opened his mouth, but words failed him. A loud pounding at the front door made them both stiffen. Leigh wrapped her house robe around her and headed for the door. Bodahn beat her to the door and looked up at his mistress warily. "Who's there?"

"Warden Commander Nathaniel Howe sent me serah. His wife is in labor and needs a healer." Leigh narrowed her eyes at the door and drew one of her hidden dagger that she had in strategic places all over the estate just in case. She opened the door and found the person she was talking to was none other than Sigrun. "Please we need Anders help." Leigh did not even get a chance to turn around to yell for him, he was right behind her with his bag and staff ready.

"You go I will be along soon. Sigrun were are they staying?"

"The Demon Slayer at the docks. It is the royal ship."

'Lead the way Sigrun." Leigh did not wait to see them leave, she ran up the stairs taking them two at a time to get herself up faster. She put on one of her old linen shirts and a pair of old leather pants. Her dagger belt she threw over her arm and her father's staff was now slung on her back as she slide down the banister.

"Bodahn we'll be back. Hold down the fort." The dwarf nodded and watched her leave. She caught up to Anders and Sigrun right before they reached the docks.

"By the Stone human did you fly here?"

"Yes, you could say that. I know a few shortcuts on how to get around the city quickly. Just in case we need a fast escape." The closer they got to the royal ship the louder the screams got. Leigh shivered a bit at the sound. Anders moved faster than she had even seen him move before, as he cleared the ramp in two strides. Leigh saw King Alistair trying to hold back Nathaniel every time his wife screamed. Sigrun told Anders where to head, but she did not follow, she went and stood by Nathaniel. Leigh followed Anders and stopped dead when she got to the room. Shyira was panting and moaning, her small body was being held up by both Velanna and Queen Ashlyn.

"How long has she been like this?'

"About an hour. The labor was going along normally then..." Anders ran his hands over the very swollen belly of the elf and his eyes turned dark with worry. "What is it?"

"The baby did not turn the right way. It is trying to come out backwards and her small body can not take that. I need to try to turn him around before we lose them both." Another scream of pain made Leigh feel ill. She backed up and stayed out of the way. "Lay her down on some blankets. The rocking of the ship is not helping, but there is no way we can move her. Velanna get something for her to bite down on. Ash please hold her down. Leigh I need your help." She hurried and knelt by his side and tried not to let him see the fear in her eyes. "Your hands are smaller than mine, I need you to...reach in and turn the baby around."

"I...yes, okay." "_Pash help!" "I am right here. I know you can do this." "I wish I did." "The poor girl is afraid enough she does not need to see a red glowing woman in front of her." Just listen to what he says and you will do fine."_

"Everyone ready? Alright, Shy everything will be alright I promise you. I need you to relax as much as you can to help us." The elf nodded and gripped the queen's arms. Leigh heard the queen talking softly to Shyira and it surprised her a little.

"It's alright. I'm right here, just like you were there for me when I had Duncan." Shyira let out another scream as Leigh's hands slipped into her. Anders used his magic to ease the pain.

"Leigh slowly move him around so his head is facing you." Leigh nodded not wanting to try to speak. She never in her lifetime thought she would have her hands inside another person's body. She had seen her father do it, and Anders as well, but she was no healer. She could feel her body shaking and she tried to keep her hands steady as she slowly moved the wriggling baby around. She caught Anders smiling at her for a split second. His brow was furrowed with concentration. Once he was satisfied that the baby was in the right place he poured more of his magic into Shyira. "Alright Leigh." She pulled her hands away and grabbed a towel. "Shy I need you to push."

'I can't..."

"Yes you can. Your a strong woman, you have to be to put up with Nathaniel. Now push." The elf gritted her teeth and bared down. Leigh moved out of the way and let Velanna take her place to help Anders. After a few more minutes of pushing the sounds of a bleating baby filled the air. Velanna wrapped the wiggling little babe in a towel and cooed at him. "You did good Shy. He is a beautiful little baby." Shyira smiled weakly at Anders and laid her head back.

"I'm going to go tell the proud papa the good news." Leigh started to head for the upper decks of the ship til a feeling a dread hit her. "_Something is wrong Leigh, her life force is fading."_ The sound of worried yells echoed behind her and she spun around heading back to the room.

"Anders do something!"

"I'm trying, she is bleeding out faster than I can heal her. Velanna help me!" Both mages poured healing magic into the small paling body of the elf. "Come on Shy, you can't do this to Nate. He didn't fight his way back from the blighted Deep Roads to lose you now."

"It is not working, we're losing her." Anders began to glow bright blue. Justice lent his power, but left Anders in control to heal.

"Maker please..." Velanna felt someone tug her out of the way and she nearly screamed at the sight before her. The red glow clashed with Anders blue one bathing the room in a eerie purple glow. Leigh or rather Pash knelt down and held out her hands over Shyira. Ashlyn and Velanna could only watch. "Can you save her?" Pash only smiled, her hand glowed a bright white as she held them over his hands. The room filled with a blinding flash and disappeared just as quickly.

"Your time in this place is not over yet child of the Dales. Wake and greet your son." Shyira's eyes fluttered open and she slowly sat up off the floor.

'What...what happened?" The cooing of her baby was the only answer to come to her. Both Velanna and Ashlyn still stared at Leigh, trying to figure out just what had happened and what she was. Shyira even gave her a wary look and scooted back towards her friends. "What are you?"

"I am a spirit from the Beyond."

"Not that I am ungrateful, but why did you help me? I always thought spirits did not care about mortals." Pash gave a soft laugh and shook her head.

"Most do not and those that do are called demons, who only want to possess what they can't have. I am Compassion, the essence of love and mercy."

"But you possess Serah Hawke do you not, doesn't that make you a demon?"

"It would if I was in control of her. She asked me to help, but this body and her life are her own. I make no decisions for her, nor do I ever want to." Anders could feel sadness in Justice as Pash spoke, and guilt. She was far stronger than he ever could be. She did not lose herself to Leigh's emotions like Justice does to his. "Leigh is very special to me, as are those she loves. I wish no harm to anyone."

"You said my time was not up, how would you know that?"

"It is what you mortals call...a figure of speech, but I was right since you still live." Ashlyn met Anders' eyes silently asking for an explanation. It did not go unnoticed by Pash. "I think I will let Leigh explain she is less unnerving than I." The red glow faded leaving Leigh clutching her head.

'Maker I hate that." Anders could only give a weak laugh. "It's not funny, my head feels like it is about to split open."

"I know, welcome to my life." Velanna leaned over and whispered in to the queen's ear.

"I don't know whether to think this is romantic or to be scared shitless?" The queen shrugged her shoulders. She was not sure how to feel either. She was very grateful that Shyira was alive as was her son, but the sight of two spirit possessed mages was a little unnerving even for her. Wynne's spirit had never manifested itself in front of her.

"I need some air." Leigh stood up and teetered a bit, but righted herself quickly. "I will tell Nathaniel to get himself down here." Anders stayed and made sure Shyira was completely healed.

"Well Anders it certainly seems you have finally found someone that is just like you."

"No, she is better than I will ever be Velanna."

"Why would you say that?" The elf folded her arms against her chest and gave Anders a look he remembered hating when they were Wardens together.

"She has much better control over herself then I do. She did not grow up in the Circle, so she was not spoiled by them. She grew up free." Shyira gave Anders a sad smile. She had spoken to him at length years ago about some of the things he had endured. She wanted to understand why he hated it so much and got a pretty good picture of why.

"Your free now Anders, you must let your anger go."

"I'm not free Shy, I know it appears so, but I am just as caged."

"By Hawke?"

"Maker, no! She is the only salvation I have had these past six years. I love her."

"Then let it go what happened before. Take this fresh start and run with it."

"I...I want to but..."

'But what? Stop punishing yourself and be happy dammit."

"And the new mother has spoken." Ashlyn put her hand on Shyira's arm to calm her down and to also hand her the baby. Nathaniel stood in the door way and smiled.

"Hawke told me I needed to get my arse down here and meet my child. So is the baby a Thomas or a Talia?"

"Thomas." The normally stoic Warden broke out in a goofy fatherly grin.

"Careful Nate your face might crack if you smile anymore."

"Shut it Anders." His voice lacked any kind malice. He clapped the mage on his back making Anders yelp. "I can never thank you enough my friend."

"You don't have to thank me Nate. I was happy to help. You are a very lucky man my friend."

"I know. Hawke is waiting for you on the deck. She looked a little green."

"First time helping with a birth."

"Tell her I said thank you as well."

"I will." Anders excused himself from the room so the happy parents could bond with their baby. Ashlyn and Velanna followed right behind him. Ashlyn broke off to find Alistair and Velanna went to speak to Sigrun. "Leigh?"

"Over here."

"You alright?"

"Other than the splitting headache I'm fine. I'm sorry if Pash scared them."

"I don't think she scared them, just surprised them. She saved Shyira's life. I have never seen healing like that before."

"She called it Mercy's Touch. She used it on you in the Deep Roads after the ogres used you as a kickball."

"I will have to thank her when I see her next. You did really well in there."

"I was scared out of my wits."

"So was I the first time I had to help deliver a child, at least you had some experience watching your father. I had to stumble through with only a kid to help me."

"They look so happy." Anders winced when he saw the expression on her face. She was envious of Nathaniel and Shyira, but her face also showed sadness. He reached for her, but she shrugged out of his reach. "I am going to go home."

"I'll have Sigrun walk me home later then. I want to stay and make sure Shyira is alright."

"I will see you at home then." She didn't look at him as she left. Her shoulders looked slumped and her walk heavy. Anders' self loathing hit a all time high watching her walk away.

"You know Anders for being one of the smartest men I have ever met, you have to be the dumbest shit to let her walk away like that." He jumped and found Ashlyn standing against the railing of the ship.

"Commander I...I didn't see you standing there."

"I have told you before Anders you can call me Ashlyn or Ash, we are friends you know." He nodded numbly. His expression reminded her so much of Alistair's when she first met him. The kicked puppy look broke her heart. "Why did you let her go like that?"

"She...I...don't know."

"She loves you, you do see that right?"

"Yes and I love her, I don't see what you are..." Before he could register what she was doing Ashlyn's hand whacked the back of his skull. "Ow, what did you do that for?"

"That was for being a dumb shit."

"Maker, I never thought someone so small could hit that hard."

"Would you like me to call Sigrun up here and let her have a go."

"No, no that is quite alright. She hits harder than you do." He rubbed his head and hissed. "I am going to have a bloody lump back there thank you very much."

"Keep it up and I will make your other head match."

"What the hell did I do?" The burning look in his Commander's eyes told him she knew what he was planning to do. "Shit, he told you didn't he.

"Yes, he did. What are you thinking Anders? You will throw away everything good in your life for what?"

"I don't expect you to understand Ash, you have lived free your entire life. Mages don't have that luxury."

"Anders, I get why you want to do it, but that is not you. The man I know hated violence, especially against innocents. What happened to him?"

"He lost hope somewhere along the way that there would ever be a peaceful solution to this. The day I fused with Justice is the same day the man you knew died."

"He did not die, I still see him in flickers and shadow, but he is still there. It is not to late to stop what you are planning."

"You told me to fight for what I believed in. To try to change how mages are treated and now you are telling me not to fight?"

"Anders you are a smart man, you can fight this fight without violence."

"How,when they treat us like rabid animals? I've seen people treat their pigs better right before they slaughter them for dinner!" Their loud conversation brought most of the Wardens up from the lower decks. Even Alistair had come up to see what was going on.

"So your answer is to prove them right?" Anders growled in frustration, but it was just his, Justice stayed quiet. The spirit's respect for Ashlyn was too great for him to lash out at her. "Come with me for a moment."

"Is that an order Commander?" She glared at him, but shook it off. A wicked smile graced her lips as she grabbed his ear and dragged him with her below decks. It is not take her long to get him to what looked to be a study aboard the ship. She released his ear and went to a chest filled with scrolls. After rummaging through it for a few moments she found the bunch she was looking for.

"I want you to read this."

"What is it?"

"I found it in an old temple where Andraste's ashes were kept. At first the sister thought it was a recounting of Maferath's last days. Once she broke the cipher she found it was something totally different. She tried to get a copy to the Divine, but she was told to drop the subject. A contract was put out on her life and luck had it that is was someone I knew that took the contract and talked to me before he fulfilled it. She is safe for now, but the Chantry wants her silenced because of what is in these scrolls."

"How will this help me?"

"Read them and see. Our ship will be here for a few more days then we are heading back home. Come back and talk to me before we go." Anders stared at the scrolls in his hands and wondered what could be on them that would cost a sister of the chantry her life. He did not realize Ashlyn was standing right in front of him til her arms wrapped him in a friendly embrace. "Even after what you did and what you might be planning to do, I am still your friend Anders. We have been through the Void and back together. I have no regrets on conscripting you and saving you from that stupid bitch of a Templar, just for your own sake and that of Hawke's please read this and reconsider. You know I will always be here when you need me."

"I know, Ash. I can never repay you for what you have done for me, for us. I will read this and come back I promise."

"Go home and for Maker's sake take care of that woman who loves you so much." He gave a quick nod and left the ship. Ashlyn stood on the deck and watched him disappear into the night.

"Everything alright my love?"

"I'm praying it will be Alistair. I gave him a copy of the scrolls we found in Haven. I'm not sure if I did the right thing though." Alistair sighed and wrapped his wife in a tight hug. She turned in his arms and laid her head on his chest.

"He is a very lucky man to call you friend. You are always looking out for everyone, making sure they are safe and protecting them if they aren't. You need to have faith he will do the right thing."

"And if he doesn't?"

"Then he better remember who to turn to get his arse out of the fire." Her dark blue eyes twinkled in the moonlight as she stared up at her husband.

"You know me all too well."

"I know you never leave anyone you care about behind. You will fight to the bitter end to see that everyone is safe. It is one of the reasons I love you so much."

"I love you too."

"Come to bed, it has been a very long day and night." Ashlyn stood on her toes and kissed her husband's cheek.

"Yes it has." And she had a strange feeling this wasn't the end of it, but tonight she pushed her dread aside, tonight she would be happy for her friends.

OoO

"Leigh?" Anders wandered around their home trying to find her, but she was nowhere to be found. He flopped himself into a chair and rubbed the bridge of his nose. It had been weeks since Ashlyn and the others left. He had read the scrolls and it only helped fuel his anger. The Chantry had lied, not surprising to him, but what they did made his blood boil. They condemned a innocent woman to die just because they feared her powers. He remembered Pash had told him a little bit of it, but he had not completely believed her, now there was no doubt in his mind. Ashlyn had given him a few copies of the scrolls to do with what he willed, and he had seriously thought about taking it to the Grand Cleric. He knew it would do nothing, so he left it alone. Why would she believe a mage?

"Blondie you home?" Varric's voice broke into Anders' trail of thought.

"I'm in the study Varric." The dwarf stood in the doorway shaking his head. "What?"

"You look like shit Blondie. When was the last time you slept or bathed?"

"I...don't remember."

"Not good." Anders stretched and yawned. "Hawke wanted me to come check on you while she is helping Aveline with a little problem."

"So she thinks I can't take care of myself now, wonderful." Varric's normally friendly demeanor turned serious.

"She, like the rest of us are concerned for you or has Justice sucked all the life right out of you. Your moody, surly, and you are treating Hawke like shit. She has been spending most of her time either at the Hanged Man or the Chantry just to keep herself busy. As much as I like talking to her, I would much rather not have to see her with the far off look that she has been getting since you threw yourself back into the whole mage thing."

"I am doing this to protect her! You think I don't know I am breaking her heart? It is killing me to see her hurt, especially when I am the one causing it."

"You know she would hit you right now if she was here. Hawke has never been one who needs protecting. She is quite capable of taking care of herself."

"She has no idea what is at stake Varric, what they will do to her if they find out what she is. They won't take her to the Gallows or make her Tranquil, they will kill her. She is too dangerous to them."

"You don't give her enough credit Blondie, this is not the first time she has fought against Templars or impossible odds. She is a survivor."

"You know better than anyone there are things you can't survive." Varric held Anders' gaze, even when a bit of Justice started to surface.

"If you think spirit guy scares me think again Blondie." This time Justice could not be held back. He burst forth and menaced toward Varric. To his credit the dwarf held his ground, though inside he wanted to run screaming. "What are you gonna do Justice squash me like a bug, fry me with lightning, or bore me to death with your rants about injustice." A loud growl sounded from Anders followed by a bolt of red light hitting the mage in the chest. Varric spun around to find Hawke standing behind him glowing a hellish red.

"Are you alright Varric?" The voice coming from her was not the one dwarf knew. He nodded to scared to reply any other way. His eyes fell on the now limp form of Anders splayed out on the study floor. "I am sorry to say Justice does not understand sarcasm. He takes things too literally."

"I hate to ask this, but you aren't Hawke are you?" The woman gave a short little laugh and shook her head.

"She told you of the spirit that helped her bind her powers when she was younger, yes?"

"Yeah, so you are she?"

"Yes Varric I am she."

"Is this a new mage thing, instead of demons the new rage is spirits?"

"It is not what either of us wanted. It was the only way to save her life after she was run through by the Arishok. I am not like Justice, I prefer to just watch and only step in when I have to." Her red eyes turned to Anders and sighed. "When Justice or Vengeance I should say comes forth I can stop him for a time and make him sleep."

"A handy person, or spirit to have around nowadays, Mister Grumpy is around a lot recently."

"I know, Anders has been driving himself to exhaustion and can not hold Justice back like before. I apologize on his behalf. Justice was not always thus. He is a very honorable, just not use to human emotions."

"And you are?"

"I have had much more experience with mortals than he has."

"Well, I guess Hawke was right saying that she and Blondie had a lot on common." The red glow faded and Leigh's gray eyes looked sad.

"Varric I am so sorry. You could have been hurt."

"Well you saved my ass, so don't worry about it. Do you need help getting him up to bed?"

"No, I will wait til he wakes up and help him there myself." Varric turned to leave, but Leigh stopped him. "How are you not phased by all this?"

"Hawke being your friend these past six years has never been boring and it has given me plenty of material for my stories. The main reason this does not make me run away screaming is your my friend Hawke, and as much as I act like I don't care, I do." Leigh smiled and hugged her dwarven friend.

"I don't care what anyone says Varric, you are the best friend anyone could ever have."

"And so are you Hawke, I was trying to remind Blondie of that, but Mister Grumpy decided he did not like my tone. Just don't give up on him yet, Choir Boy is not nearly as fun."

"Varric, there is nothing other than friendship between Sebastian and I."

"Tell that to him. I better get going Hawke before Isabela cleans out all the sad sops at the Hanged Man. I will see you tomorrow."

"Night Varric, and thanks again." Varric tipped his hand and bowed before letting himself out. Leigh turned and gave Anders a sorrowful look. She went upstairs and got a pillow and a blanket for him. After propping his head up with the pillow and covering him with the blanket she went to his desk and looked over his manifesto again. "Oh Anders, what is going on with you?" His writing was getting more and more erratic. Some of the paragraphs made no sense and others were more like threats than points of discussion. Beneath the manifesto she found the now well worn scroll that Ashlyn had given him. Leigh settled herself down and began to read the accounting of the last days of Andraste and the tale of her daughter. As she read it she felt Pash become restless in her head. A large wave of sorrow hit her like a charging ogre making her stop reading because of the blinding tears that came out of nowhere. She wasn't sure if Anders had heard her crying or if Pash's spell had finally worn off, but soon she felt his arms around her pulling her close.

"Love what's wrong? Why are you crying?"

"I...it's not me, it's Pash, some...something about this scroll upset her." She handed him the parchment trying desperately to stop her sobs. "What is it?"

"It was found by the Wardens during the Blight. It was a ancient scroll written in cipher to hide it from the Tevinter Imperium. It accounts the last days of Andraste and the life of her daughter."

"She had a child?"

"Yes, and the Chantry covered it up."

"Why wouldn't they want her bloodline to live on?"

"Not if the child was a mage. A very strong one at that. From what I gathered from this scroll the woman was said to be the daughter of the Maker and her power was unmatched. She was feared by the higher ups in the fledgling Chantry. They hunted her and her Templar husband down, burning them like they burned her mother."

"Holy Maker!" Leigh's mind raced. Her dreams came flooding back to her.

"Leigh?"

"The dreams I have been having, this is what I had been dreaming."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, tell me in this scroll did it say she confronted her mother's betrayer and spared him?"

"You mean Maferath, yes...yes she did. How did yo...you haven't even gotten to that page yet?"

"I don't know, but I have been dreaming about this for three years now."

"Since you joined with Pash am I right?"

"Yes, but what would that...oh you don't think..."

"Only she could answer that."

"Right now she is being very quiet." Leigh took the scrolls back to finish reading them later. "Is Justice calmed down now?"

"For now, I have to go find Varric and apologize. I wasn't even mad at him, neither was Justice really."

"Then why did you look like you were going to incinerate him?"

"It was something he said. It made me angry."

"I know Varric can say things that make you want to rip your hair out, but I can't imagine what he could have said to you that would have pissed you off enough to let Justice hurt him." Anders turned away form her, but found her hand gripping his chin quite tightly.

"Oh no you don't, what did he say that set you off?"

"He said you were spending a lot of time at the Chantry."

"Yes I have, because of my play for the Viscount's seat. I have been trying to get the support of the Grand Cleric and some of the other nobles. Best place to get them is at the Chantry during confession. They already have guilty consciences why not use it to my advantage. Why would me going there make you upset?"

"I...it's nothing." Her grip almost got to the point of being painful on his chin. He knew the look she was giving him well, it meant just spit it out before I get really angry. "Alright, you win just stop looking at me like that. I'm afraid I am losing you. Not just to me throwing myself into the cause of the mages, but to Sebastian as well. He has so much more to offer you then I could ever do."

"Sebastian is a friend and will never be anything more than that Anders. Yes he is helping me try to sway the nobles, but that is all. Even if he was trying to take me away from you, he would never be able to. Your the only man I want in my life, even when you try to fry one of our friends." Anders gave her a weary smile, but his eyes twinkled with light.

"I know I say this too much, but I'm sorry and I love you."

"You can never say I love you too much. And you don't have to apologize to me, but I would to Varric."

"I do have to apologize to you, I know your suffering in silence while I, as you say throw myself into the cause."

"I know you are helping our fellow mages, who need you right now. I know what you are doing is important. I just hope when this is all over you and I can leave this damn place and make a quiet life back in Ferelden."

"I'd like that, but what if you do become the Viscountess?"

"I will hold the seat til the city is stable enough for me to appoint someone to take my place. I am not doing this for the long run, I don't have the stomach for politics."

"That could take years."

"Not with the help I am getting from Varric and Sebastian. Tops maybe a year possibly two if I meet firm opposition."

"There will be because of your views on mages. Most people are afraid of us."

"Right now more of them are afraid of Meredith and you would be surprised how many of the nobles have mages in their families. They tire of the abuses that their kin are forced to endure at the hands of the Templars."

"Then why haven't they tried to change things?"

"I don't know, but between the two of us maybe we can."

"You as the public face and me behind the scenes."

"Why not, you hate to have too much attention on you."

"That I do."

"So together we can do this."

"I am starting to think as long as I have you I can do anything." His lips searched out hers making her drop the scrolls in her hands. He went to reach for them to give them back, but she stopped him.

"Why don't we just leave that where it is for now, I have a better idea." He could see the lust in her eyes. It had been a long time since they had shared each others company in that way. His cause and her responsibilities being Kirkwall's champion have kept them apart.

"And that idea would be?"

"Meet me upstairs in a few minutes and you will find out." She gave him a seductive look and left the study. He cleaned up his mess in record time and raced up the stairs to be with her. Even after these past three years every time with her was like the first. His heart tightened with pain thinking about the future. Anders knew he did not have one, but he would make sure Leigh would. She would hate him for it, but this is how it has to be. There was no turning back.


	19. Chapter 19

"_Where in the Void? Anders found himself in the Fade. It had been years since he had been awake in the Fade. Normally Justice was in charge whenever they were here and he slept. He forgot how strange and disorienting it was. Everything around him shifted and he felt like his stomach had dropped to the floor. Once he got his bearings again he looked up and saw a young boy run by him followed by a group of demons. Anders tried to move and help the boy, but his body would not move. He heard the child scream as the demons surrounded him, laughing wickedly. _

"_There is nowhere to run little mage. Just give in." The boy coward in fear as they closed in around him. Anders screamed in frustration. His body still would not move, he would have to stand here and watch this poor young mage being devoured by demons. _

"_Stay away from me!" The boy curled himself into a ball and began to sob. _

"_Step away from the mortal demon, now." The flat voice of Justice sounded from Anders' left. He watched the spirit walk in a purposeful stride, sword drawn and ready to slay the demons. He looked like he had when Anders first met him, covered in heavy armor, a helmet covering his face._

"_You have no business here brother, this tasty morsel is ours."_

"_I will not warn you again, back away from the boy." The rage demon rounded on Justice only to feel his blade in kind. The other demons decided to take care of the threat before returning to the boy. Justice made short work on the demons, but missed the pride demon sneaking up behind the boy. The boy yelled for help and it came in the form of a flaming sword slicing through the demon. Once the creature's two halves fell away the boy's savior was reveled._

"_Are you alright?" The spirit was a woman holding her hand out to the frightened boy to help him off the ground. "I will not hurt you, my friend and I are spirits, not demons."_

"_What is this place? Why am I here?"_

"_You are in the Fade. The land of the Maker and the reason you are here is you are a mage."_

"_I am not! My Da says mages are cursed and evil. I don't want to be that."_

"_Mages can be evil if they so chose to be, but they can also be heroes." The boy looked at the spirit like she was daft. His eyes flicked back to the armored man standing not far behind him and fear began to creep into his face again. "He will not hurt you."_

"_I want to go home."_

"_I know you do little mage. Here let me help you to your feet." Her hands gently took the boys' and she smiled. "Ah, healer. That is what you will become. A great healer."_

"_A healer." He wrinkled his nose and made a disgusted face. "Healers are old batty mages in the stories my Ma tells me. They never get the princess and end up dying."_

"_Sometimes that is true, but I can see a strength in you. You will not be one of those old batty mages, you will be hero."_

"_Really?"_

"_Sister?" Justice shifted his weight uncomfortably. "We need to move on."_

"_I will follow once I know this young man is safe and understands."_

"_I will wait for you at the gate then." The woman spirit turned back to the boy her smile was warm putting the boy at ease._

"_Walk with me child. There is much to talk about." Anders eyes went wide as he started to remember this. That boy was him. It was his first time in the Fade. He had almost forgotten it. He could not for the life of him wonder why he was thinking about this now. _

"_Why is this happening to me?"_

"_You are chosen."_

"_What if I don't wanna be chosen?"_

"_I am sorry to say that it can not be undone. You are a mage, with that comes a tough road to walk. I will not lie to you, you will be feared and hated by most. Your gift is both a blessing and a curse."_

"_Will those things follow me around again?" The boy jerked his head toward the demon corpses._

"_Yes, demons want to gain access to your world. They try to join with you here in the Fade, take over your soul and hold you inside your own body to use your power."_

"_That...that does not sound good."_

"_It is not." His face fell with worry. The spirit put her hand on the side of his face. Anders remembered her touch was warm and soothing. "I can however make it so none of them will even be able to touch you."_

"_How?" Her finger traced a symbol on his forehead. It felt tingly and a shot of heat went through him. "What did you do?"_

"_The mark I have put on you will protect you from any demon no matter how strong. They will never be able to possess you."_

"_How will a mark help me?"_

"_It is the mark of the Maker. It marks you as one chosen by him. It will protect you here in the Fade and in years to come out in the waking world."_

"_Are you the Maker?" The spirit laughed and it sounded like the tinkling of bells going off._

"_No I am just one of his children. Just as you are. Never fear the Fade, for as long as I and my brother are here you are safe." The boy gave her a quizzical look, but the spirit just pat him on the head. "It is time for you to go back to your own world. No matter how dark it gets remember there is always hope." Anders watched his younger self fade away. He sank to his knees and shook his head._

"_There is no hope, not for me, not anymore."_

"_Are you so sure? The voice made him jump up to his feet staff at the ready. Before him stood another spirit, much different from the one who marked him years ago. Her features were much less ethereal. Her face was kind and beautiful, her body was clad in a dress that looked like liquid silver. Aside from Leigh this woman was the most captivating creature he had ever seen. "There is always hope."_

"_I...I don't believe that anymore."_

"_Why?"_

"_Nothing ever changes. No matter how hard I fight they always win. At first I just made a game of running away, playing the rebellious child. Then I joined the Wardens and relished the fact the damn Templars could not touch me without starting a war. After Ash left I had no shield from them again. I don't blame her, not in the slightest. She had her own family to start and Ferelden to help rule. I thought joining with Justice was the answer. I help my friend and he in turn helps me fight for the plight of mages. I ruined him and myself for what? I can't even see the goal anymore. I can't discern justice from vengeance anymore."_

"_You are agonizing over what you have to do." _

"_Yes, and I don't know if I have the strength to do it. If I go through with this, I will end up doing something I never thought I would do. I am a healer not a murderer, but I can't see any other way to get them to stand up and take notice. That mages will not be pinned under the Chantry's thumb anymore. We will not suffer their abuses anymore."_

"_Sometimes there must be lose for people to take notice. How many innocent mages have lost their lives to the law of the Chantry? How many innocent families have been torn apart? Innocents die everyday, it is not right, but it happens. You always have a choice on how you want to fight this war."_

"_I see no other way."_

"_Then you must do what you think is right." Anders sighed and buried his head in his hands. A buzzing started to sound somewhere deep in his head and steadily grew. He looked up at the woman standing next to him._

"_Why am I hearing the sound of darkspawn? I am not...I was at home at my desk." The woman just smiled as his dream began to fade. The buzzing was now almost deafening in his head. "Wait!" The woman vanished as did the Fade around him. The sensation of something tickling his face was the last thing he felt before he woke up._

Anders' eyes flew open. He could still hear the buzzing hum in his head, but his vision was blocked. What appeared to be a feather was blocking his view. He bolted up from his slumped position at his desk. A cloaked woman sat at the edge of the desk kicking her legs back and forth in a lazy motion.

"I did not mean to startle you Anders. Bodahn let me in."

"Ash? What in the name of the Maker are you doing back here?"

"I have some Warden business here in the city, but wanted to stop and check on you."

"You mean see if I am going looney right?"

"Too late for that I'm afraid my friend. You were looney when I met you seven years ago and from what Wynne has told me you have never been sane."

"Thanks a lot Commander."

"You look tired my friend and it looks like you need to eat. Please tell me you are not trying to waste yourself away and what is with the all black clothing?"

"I'm not really. It's just I have so much to do and so little time to get it done. I sometimes go days without eating or sleeping. And the clothing, well I...it was time for a change."

"You look like a mad old crow."

"So now I am looney and mad, wonderful. Merrill use to say my old coat reminded her of a crow in anteing."

"That is one way of putting it, so now you are done anteing. I thought we all agreed that the dark and brooding one was Nate and you were the sarcastic funny one. When the hell did you two switch bodies?"

"I'm not the same person you knew Ash, I have seen too much and done too much. That Anders doesn't exist anymore." More than anything she wanted to slap him silly, but decided to take the more loving approach.

"You know I could give you something to help you sleep. It was something Leliana would give me when I was having trouble right after the Blight ended."

"It's fine. I need to get this done Ash. I don't care if I lose sleep or thin out a bit."

"A bit? Maker's breath Anders, I have seen darkspawn emissaries that look healthier than you do right now!" The concern in her eyes made him wince. No one before Ashlyn had ever held his total respect and only a few after her hold it now. He knew this woman had walk through fire with him after he was conscripted. She had no way of knowing he would be valuable to the Wardens, let alone survive everything they went through. Looking into her eyes all he could see was her concern and love for him. It made him feel like a total ass.

"Ash..." Her hand went up to stop his speech before he could even begin.

"Anders, take it from someone who almost royally screwed up her life. This is not who you are, this cause will kill you and those around you." He opened his mouth to protest, but she cut him off again. "Let me finish, I know Justice has pushed you to go to the extremes you have. He does not understand that change does not come swiftly. Even if you go through with you plan today, it could take months, years and possibly decades before anything changes. If your lucky it does and if your not it could become worse for your fellow mages. Then oh look, your gone, dead and they are left trying to pick up the pieces you left in your wake."

"So you are trying to talk me out of this again. Don't you think I haven't thought of that? Don't you think I haven't agonized over what could happen especially to the people I love. I could be leaving a world were Leigh is either a hero or a monster for what she is. I am doing this for her, for Shy and Velanna and all other mages. You have no one to blame but yourself for what I have become."

"Oh this should be interesting. How am I to blame for you becoming a complete and utter prig?"

"You told me to fight for what I believe in, to stand up and not take it anymore. So Commander I say it again this is your fault. I was quite happy being a selfish bastard til you planted the seed in my brain and now...if I turn back what will you think of me?" Tears streamed down his face and his shoulders shook hard. Ashlyn jumped off the desk and pulled him from his chair, embracing him. His head rested on her shoulder while her hand smoothed out his hair.

"Anders I would never think less of you no matter what you have done or will do. Why would you ever think I would?"

"Everyone eventually thinks I am not worth the trouble. My father surely thought that when he called the Templars to come take me away. You were the first person who ever put their faith in me and it would hurt both Justice and I to lose that."

"I still have faith in you and always will. Your father was foolish to throw away such a wonderful person out of fear. Too many people fear what they don't understand and what they covet. You have mages who want nothing more than to be normal and you have normal people wanting to be mages just so they can abuse the gift they have been given."

"I know. Look at Leigh. Most of her family are mages, herself included, but she had to be bound to protect her from the ignorance of the Chantry. I want her to be safe Ash, I need her to be safe. She is the most important thing in my life. She woke something in me I thought was dead after I fused with Justice. Even when I pushed her away again and again, she never gave up on me. Even now she still comes back no matter how much I am breaking her heart."

"She is a strong woman who loves you very deeply."

"I know, but I also know I am hurting her and there is only so much a person can take. She deserves better. Leigh deserves someone like Sebastian Vael, he can give her a better life."

"Do you really think that? Maker's blood Anders, Sebastian is a brother in the Chantry and if he knew what she was, don't you think he would turn her in. He would be honor bound to do so. I could see he was watching her that day in the Keep. His eyes betrayed him, he loves her, but love can only take one so far. What I saw between you and Hawke was much more than that. Very few people even find their soulmate Anders. I found mine, Nate found his and Maker help you, you found yours."

"I never really believed in soulmates and destiny til..., but that was a long time ago and a lot has changed."

"Til what?"

"Nothing." Ashlyn raised her eyebrow and stared him down. He cringed remembering full well what that look meant. Her painted face made it all the more potent. "Alright, alright just stop looking at me that way. I swear they should put you in the Chantry as the Divine. You could scare a confession out of anyone just with that bloody look."

"I inherited it from my mother. Fergus and I never got away with anything when she was around. That look alone made you confess to things you haven't even done yet." Anders chuckled along with Ashlyn for a moment, but he stopped and sighed.

"It was my fifth attempt at escape from the Tower. It was also my longest time staying out in the world before I joined the Wardens. I had six Templars hot on my heals when I ran through this little town in the south. I have no idea what it was called I just know it wasn't far from the Wilds. They cornered me, beat me and proceeded to try to rape me, but I was saved by an apostate. She had more power than any mage I have ever met before or since. She took me to her home and her family let me stay the night, even packed a bag for me with food and potions. Her father and sister were also..."

"Also what Anders? Why do you look like you have seen a ghost?"

"Ash what towns are near the Wilds?"

"The only one I knew of was Lothering, but it was destroyed in the Blight. It was right outside the Wilds. Most people steered clear of anything to do with the Wilds because of the legends of the witches." Anders jumped up from his seat and went to find Leigh's book on Ferelden she had found recently. He thumbed through the pages and stopped on the page that held the map. It was a newer book and did not have Lothering's location.

"Do you remember where is was this book doesn't show it." Ashlyn leaned over his shoulder and ran her finger over the page.

"Here is Ostagar. And up here would have been Lothering. It is south of the Bannorn and west of the Brecilian Forest." Anders felt his heart skip a beat and he placed the book back on the shelf slowly. "Anders, for the love of the Maker what is it?"

"How did I not see it? Am I that blind?" Ashlyn took his shoulders and shook him a bit to get his mind to snap back. "I need to go." He grabbed his staff and bolted out the door of the estate. Ashlyn fast on his heels.

"What the hell? Anders?" "_Maker, he is faster than I ever thought possible. This is what I get for making him run with the rest of us all over Amaranthine. Where is he headed?"_Anders did not slow his pace til he got to Hanged Man. Ashlyn followed him in and wrinkled her nose at the smell. It reminded her of the Pearl just dirtier. The men in the place stared lecherously at her and she was thankful she was not some shrinking flower. One of the drunken men tried to catch her wrist and caught a fist right in the face. Ashlyn looked up, smiling at the person who had laid the man out flat. "Hello Isabela."

"Hello yourself, what is Feathers all ruffled about?"

"Damned if I know. I was talking to him and all of a sudden he took off like a demon out of the Void. Where the hell is he going now?" Ashlyn saw Anders ascend the stairs and disappear. "I guess we should follow him."

"He must being going to see Varric, he has a permanent room here. After you Queenie." Ashlyn scrunched her face at the rogue who just laughed and pushed her along. Half way up the stairs they could hear Anders raised voice and both woman picked up their pace.

"What do you mean you don't know where she is?"

"Just what I said Blondie, I don't know where she is. She stopped by here early this morning and told me she had something she had to go do. Hawke told me she would see us all later when it was done."

"Did she say what she was doing?" Varric opened his mouth then snapped it shut. "Varric please where is she?"

"She got a letter from the Knight Commander requesting her presence." Anders blood ran cold at the thought of Leigh going to the Gallows.

"Why did you let her go alone?"

"She wasn't alone Blondie. She took Red and Choir Boy with her. She did not want to ask anyone else just in case Meredith decided to be nasty. She worried it might be a trap, but with the two she took she thought Meredith would think twice before trying anything."

"Maker's mercy how can she be so reckless. She just walked into the bloody wolf's den."

"It is not like she is a mage Anders there is nothing the Templars can do to her, just Bethany." Both Anders and Varric shared a look at Isabela's words. "What was that look for? Alright boys spit it out." Ashlyn put a hand on Isabela's shoulder and whispered in her ear. "Your fucking shitting me, there is no way she is a..." Three hands covered the pirate's mouth before she screamed out the Leigh was a mage.

"Keep your voice down Isabela. We don't need the entire world knowing what she is." Anders glared at Ashlyn, but the Warden held his gaze.

"She is her friend and deserves to know the truth."

"Isabela is not known for keeping secrets Ash." The pirate rolled her eyes and shook them all off her. She stood in front of Anders and jabbed her finger in his chest.

"I never told anyone about you and her being together in the beginning. Who the fuck did you think helped her get ready for you that night, hmm, yeah that would have been me. She trusts me enough for something like that then you can trust me not to tell anyone about what she is!"

"I...I'm sorry Isabela. I'm just worried, as strong as Leigh is she has no idea what Templars are capable of. They won't take her to the Gallows if they find out. They will kill her, she is too strong to be controlled."

"Wouldn't they just try to...make her Tranquil?" Isabela's voice dropped off and filled with dread.

"That would be worse than death. She would stop being who she is."

"I know and if that were to ever happen I would kill her myself just to put her out of her misery." He was not expecting to hear that from Isabela. She was always such a selfish woman. He knew she was Leigh's friend, but he never thought Isabela felt the same way. "Oh don't give me that look, the girl almost bloody died when she fought the Arishok because of me. Then she risked herself again to save me from Castillion when he came for me last month."

"Isabela might be a selfish bitch most of the time Anders, but she is loyal to those who have shown her friendship. Alistair and I trust her completely."

"Thanks Ashlyn."

"Your welcome. I will see what I can find out about what the Templar wanted with Hawke. Stay here and wait for me to return and that is an order Anders."

"Yes Commander." He sank into one of Varric's chairs staring at the floor. Ashlyn motioned for the two rogues to follow her for a moment.

"Keep him here and distracted please. I will be back as fast as I can." With a whirl of her cloak she was gone leaving Varric and Isabela with a very agitated Anders.

"I know she is his old Warden Commander, but I didn't know you knew her too."

"Oh she and I go way back. I taught her how to be a duelist. You will never find a finer rogue Varric. She puts the two of us to shame and that man of hers, I get gooseflesh just thinking about him."

"Wait you and he...what the hell did she think about that?"

"Oh Varric, don't tell me you have never had a threesome." The dwarf's eyes went wide and he shook his head.

"I guess I should not be surprised at all. So what do yo suggest we do to keep him here?"

"Not sure but we will think of something."

OoO

Ashlyn stayed in the shadows near the entrance of the Gallows. This place made Kinloch Hold look welcoming. From where she was she could see everything. The abundance of Tranquil made her stomach turn. She was happy it was not like this in Ferelden anymore. The decision both her and Alistair made to open the Tower, letting families visit with their loved ones was frowned upon by the Divine. She had sent missive after missive ordering them to put things back the way they were or face harsh action. Ashlyn was never one to back down from a fight especially one she knew was utterly stupid. It wasn't like they had freed the mages, though she would be all for it if they could. It was their ultimate goal in the long run to see mages living free, without fear of being dragged off again, but these things take time and patience. The sight of a dark haired man exiting the Gallows made her move from her hiding place. She waited til he had cleared the gate heading to the water to talk to him.

"I will have to say Nate, Templar armor does not suit you."

"How in the Maker's name do they wear this damn suit? It is heavier than Ogrhen and I feel like I am baking in it."

"I never did understand how Alistair was able to walk around in that let alone fight, but you and I wear light armor, so I guess we are just not use to it. What did you find out?"

"Hawke was asked by Meredith to find some runaway mages. She found three, two were blood mages and attacked her the third the Knight Commander is convinced Hawke aided his escape, but she can't prove it. Now she is looking into something for the First Enchanter."

"Did you give Ser Cullen the letter for him and Bethany Hawke?"

"Yes and he was very pleased to be getting out of here. He was even more pleased to see so was Bethany. At least they will be out of harms way when this place goes to the Void."

"Yes, now we put the other part of our plan in motion. I brought you a change of clothes so you can move around better. Sigrun is waiting for you in the tunnels under the Chantry. I have to tell Anders that Hawke is safe so he doesn't proceed with his plan before we get our end done."

"I knew the first day I met him Anders would be trouble, but he is one of us and for better or worse I am proud to call him friend. He saved my son and my wife I can never truly repay him for that."

"This will be a start then. Just be careful that sniveling shit Addler is still hanging around the city trying to find him, but with out his phylactery he hasn't got a prayer."

"What did happen to Anders' phylactery I wonder?" A wicked grin broke out on Ashlyn's face making Nathaniel chuckle.

"It's good to be the Queen."

"And to have sticky fingers I see."

"I wasn't about to let the Templars try to find him if he was still alive. They would have killed him and told us about it later."

"You knew didn't you, about what he did?"

"Yes, and I covered his trail. He was so ashamed of what he did to Rolen and the others. He felt he couldn't face us, but you know me I have many spies around Ferelden. It did not take me long to find him. I helped him find passage on a ship and let him go."

"He really is one lucky son of a bitch I hope he knows that. I will see you at the rendezvous point in two days Commander. And thanks for the change of clothes. There was no way I was going to be able to move quickly and quietly in this."

"Your welcome see you in a few days." Ashlyn headed back to the Hanged Man. She was so deep in thought that she did not see the group coming toward her when she rounded the corner. She slammed right into a well armored body and barely was able to keep on her feet. Her arms pinwheeled to catch her balance, the sound of armor crashing to the ground followed by a soft curse. "I am so sorry, I was not looking were I was going."

"It is fine neither was I." The soft accent greeted her ears. She looked down to see Sebastian sitting on the ground. Three others helped pull him up to a standing position. "This is not a good place to be lost in thought I am afraid. The pickpockets will steal you deaf, dumb and blind if you are not careful."

"I am normally much more careful than this. Again I am sorry serah." Leigh who had been standing behind Sebastian stepped out with her dagger drawn.

"Make sure you still have your coin purse Sebastian, she might have lifted it when she bumped into you."

"I am no thief thank you, Serah Hawke. Wardens don't stoup that low." Leigh's eyes widened and she put her dagger away.

"What are you doing back in Kirkwall?" Ashlyn could hear and see the fear running through the woman and she knew she would have to put her mind at ease.

"I am on Warden business. I was heading back from the coast and stopped by to see Anders for a moment. Just making sure he is alright."

"Your not here to take him back are you?" Leigh's voice was tight and her eyes pleaded with the Warden.

"No, his life is his own now. If I was to take him back certain people would want to hurt him and I will not allow that to happen."

"Thank you, I was afraid...I can't lose him."

"I know how you feel Hawke. I would not want anyone to take the man I love away from me either."

"Hawke I need to get back to the Chantry for vespers."

"I understand. I appreciate your help today Sebastian." From the look on his face Ashlyn could see that Sebastian was hopelessly in love with Leigh and it hurt him to hear her talk about Anders. He stole on last look at Leigh before he left. "Are the Wardens still trying to find things in the Deep Roads Commander?"

"Commander?"

"I am the Commander of the Grey in Ferelden. Or I should say I was, now Nathaniel is the Commander. And no there is nothing to find in the Deep Roads. Whatever drew them there seems to have been moved, the ones we fought were stragglers."

"Large group for being just stragglers."

"You saw Ostagar. Darkspawn like overkill, you either run into a horde or a small group. There is no rhyme or reason to them, they just are. The reason why I am here in Kirkwall was to drop off a letter to the Gallows."

"About?"

"Your sister is to be moved to Ferelden in two weeks, as is Knight Captain Cullen." Leigh could not help herself, she embraced the Warden tightly. Once she realized what she was doing she quickly let go.

"Sorry, I am just so happy they both will be out of that horrible place."

"Both will be sent to the palace in Denerim. Bethany will study under Senior Enchanter Wynne and hopefully will take over for her as the royal mage when the time comes. Cullen will be there to appease the Chantry, but his role will be that of companion not guard. The Knight Commander here was not thrilled about it to say the least, but the Grand Cleric approved it on both sides."

"When you see the King and Queen please tell them they have my undying gratitude. Marker's mercy two more weeks and my sister is free. I...I have to go and find Anders, he will be happy as well."

"Then I suggest you turn around and head back to the Hanged Man. He is there with Varric and Isabela."

"That's strange, normally the only way he leaves the house is to..." Ashlyn cut her off when she saw the other two companion's eyes perk up in interest. She knew Aveline was the Captain of the guard here and the sour faced elf she had gathered hated mages for some reason. Anders never did go into detail about why and Ashlyn did not push about it either.

"He wanted to talk to you, at least that is what I could gather. He is not acting like himself, he is less and less the man I remember."

"I...I know. He is always writing that damned manifesto or out Maker knows where, doing Maker knows what." Ashlyn put a comforting hand on Leigh's shoulder, giving the woman a sympathetic look.

"I know this is not easy for you Hawke, but he does love you more than any other thing in all of Thedas. You did what none of us thought possible, you tamed his heart. The man I knew was ...well let's just say he was never one to settle down. Anders loved his freedom, but with you...I see in his eyes your the love of his life."

"Thank you, you know I always heard Wardens were these stoic, uncaring people, but the ones I have met aren't. Your all different from the ones I met at Ostagar when I was in the encampment with the king's men."

"Most of us are rough around the edges, but we are family. I can't speak for other Grey Wardens in Thedas, they might have their reasons for being cold towards other people. Ours is not an easy life, but why be standoffish about it. It makes life very lonely."

"What is Anders to you then, a friend or something more?" Aveline was playing the protective older sister card again and Leigh knew it. Her gaze bounced between the two women and caught a amused expression on the Warden's face.

"Anders is as much a brother to me as my own flesh and blood. We are bonded by blood in a way that only another Warden can fathom. But if you want a label for it, yes he is my friend and no not that sort of friend. I am a happily married woman."

"I did not mean to offend you Warden, I am just look out for Hawke."

"No harm done, she is lucky to have people who care enough to have her best interests at heart. Now shall we go and collect your man so you can give him the good news?"

"Yes." It was all Leigh could do to stop herself from skipping to the Hanged Man. Ashlyn could not help but grin. She was happy she could help this woman and her family. Once at the tavern Leigh scanned the main room and spotted Anders' blonde head. She yelled his name, he stood up and barely had enough time to brace himself as Leigh launched herself at him wrapping her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. His brain went fuzzy as her lips crushed his. He almost forgot they were in public til Aveline coughed loudly. He broke the kiss and leaned back on the table with Leigh still wrapped around him.

"What did I do to deserve that kind of greeting?"

"Your Commander just told me that Bethany and Cullen are being moved to royal palace in Ferelden to serve the crown." Shock then a wry smile crossed over his face. He mouthed thank you to Ashlyn and she nodded to him. "My sister is getting out of that horrible place, she is going to be safe."

"It is wonderful news love. She will be well cared for in Ferelden. King Alistair is a good man and will make sure she is safe."

"Wynne will also be there to mentor her for the time being."

"Senior Enchanter Wynne is an accomplished mage and is very kind. Bethany will be the perfect student for her." Leigh beamed at him and nuzzled his neck. Her fingers began to play with the feathers on his coat, she pushed back on him slightly and looked down at his new coat.

"New coat?"

"Uh, yes. Makes it harder for them to see me when I am sneaking around. Don't you like it?"

"You could be in a dress and I would still think you are the most handsome man I have ever known. You are taking that whole sexy tortured look to a new level."

"You love it and you know it." She brought her lips to his ear.

"Yes I do." All the others left the two love birds to talk. Isabela bought Ashlyn a drink and the two settled down in a secluded corner of the tavern. They had their heads together talking feverishly. Anders took Leigh up to Varric's room to talk to her about why she went to the Gallows.

"So what did the bitch want with you?"

"Who? Oh Meredith. She wanted me to hunt down mages for her and before you go all blue on me I told her no at first."

"At first?"

"She would not let it go and threatened you and Merrill, so I told her I would look into it. I wanted to help get the mages away from Kirkwall and make Meredith think they were dead. It did not go as planned, two of the mages turned to blood magic. They gave me no choice I had to fight and kill them. The last one had been in the Gallows since he was six and had no idea how to handle the outside world. I was able to get him out of Kirkwall safely."

"Why didn't you ask for my help?"

"You have been holed up in the study and every time I go in there you are hunched over writing feverishly or sleeping. I know what you are doing is important so I don't bother you." Her eyes betrayed her true feelings. He closed his eyes and made a sour face. "_I'm losing her." "I am sorry my friend, but our cause must be fought." "If I lose her what do I have to live for Justice?" "The cause." "You know this one track mind thing is getting on my nerves. I do have the right to have a life and if she is who I think she is then I owe her so much more than what she has done for me the last six years." "And just who do you think she is?" "My soulmate." "Your what?" "Nothing, never mind." "I will never understand mortals." _The feel of her hand on his cheek snapped him out of his conversation with Justice. "Are you alright love?"

"Yes, and I am all yours if you need me for the next few days." "_What?" "I am not going to keep neglecting her, so deal with it!" _"Whatever you need or want me to do I will do."

"I could think of a few things, but first I have a task Orsino wants me to look into tonight."

"And what does the First Enchanter want you to do?"

"He needs me to check on some meeting in Hightown, he thinks some of his mages might be doing things that will bring Meredith down harder on them, more than she already is. I agreed to help just in case..."

"Just in case I was part of it. Ever my protector."

"Someone has to be." Her easy smile melted his heart. He wanted to ask her so many questions about her past, but not here, not now. If she was who he thought he had to make sure above anything else she stayed safe. The witch's words still echoed in his mind from all those years ago. "She will be the champion of our kind. No Templar can stand against her, nor any mage. Demons will bend to her will if she commands it and spirits will fight for her if she asks. She must survive or we are lost."

"You know it is alright if someone protects you too." Leigh blinked back tears then buried her head in his coat. It didn't smell like his old one. The old one smelled more like him and less like the dye that was used to stain it so black. She wanted to tell him she hated it, even though it made him look even more handsome to her. It wasn't him, this wasn't her Anders, this man in front of her was a stranger. She saw flashes of her Anders, but they were becoming more and more scarce. "Hey now no tears, remember Bethany is going to be free very soon. This is a happy day." His smirk eased the vice grip on her heart, letting her relax in his arms. A loud thumping came from the door and Varric's raised voice floated into the room.

"You two better not be doing what I think you are doing it there. And if you are it better not be in my bed, I have to sleep in it you know." Leigh opened the door to find Varric holding his sides from laughter. Isabela and Ashlyn where both giggling around the corner.

"You three are evil."

"Oh Kitten, we were just having a little bit of fun." Leigh glared and stuck her tongue out at the pirate who returned the gesture in kind.

"Just for that both of you have to come with Anders and I tonight."

"Do you need a extra set of blades Hawke? I find myself with time to kill before my ship arrives."

"When is your ship coming?"

"It about two weeks. The king bid me to stay here and wait. I am to make sure your sister makes it too Denerim safely. If I sit around resting on my laurels I will go mad with boredom."

"You are more than welcome to join us Warden. I owe you much more than keeping your sanity intact though."

"Just give me a few thugs to fight now and then the next few weeks and I will be fine."

"Do you need a place to stay. I have plenty of extra rooms at my estate for you to bunk in."

"That sounds good to me."

"Anders and I will get you settled in then we will go see about this meeting. You two meet me in front of the chantry in two hours."

"We will be there." After the three left for Leigh's home Varric pulled Isabela aside. "What were you and the Warden chatting about?"

"She asked for a favor."

"And?"

"And what? It is between her and I Varric."

"You are no fun Rivani."

"Oh but I am Varric, I am."


	20. Chapter 20

Leigh bared her teeth at Samson. Her patience was all but gone at the moment. Her thoughts were only of that of her sister who had been kidnapped by the very people Leigh was trying to help. Samson held up his hands not wanting to get in the middle of what ever they wayward mages and Templars were doing. He at least had a bit of sense. Anders, Aveline, Ashlyn, and Isabela stayed silent letting Leigh talk. None of them have ever seen her this angry.

"Thrask is running the show down there. I would direct you questions to him, as for me I am getting out of here. I am all for mages having a fair go at freedom, but some of those down there are a bit scary."

"Thrask has always been straight with me, why would he kidnap my sister?"

"The only way you are going to find out is go down there and ask." Leigh shot Isabela a withering glare and marched down the hill toward the encampment. She caught sight of her sister's still form laying on the ground half way down the hill and took off in a fast sprint. Ser Tharsk saw her coming and readied himself for a fight. Leigh stopped just short of the Templar her hands held up in peace.

"Ser Thrask."

"Serah Hawke, I see you have found our little resistance against Meredith's rule."

"So I have, but that still does not tell me why you have taken my sister? She has nothing to do with this, she is leaving to join the Ferelden Circle in less than two weeks."

"We have heard that you are working for Meredith and I have to ask why Hawke? You have helped so many mages gain their freedom why would you help her track them down now?"

"I wasn't helping Meredith. I was trying to help get the mages out of Kirkwall, but two of them turned to blood magic and gave me no choice. I did not want to fight them. I want to see mages free."

"Then we have been fools." Thrask's eyes softened and he turned to the severe looking mage standing next to Bethany. "Grace release her."

"I think I like her right were she is."

"Grace we were mistaken, Hawke is not working for Meredith. We have no reason to hold Bethany. We must free her."

"I do not care if she is working for the Knight Commander or not. I want her to pay for taking my Decimus from me. I will see blood repaid in blood."

"No Grace, you will stand down. Now release the girl." Leigh caught sight of Alain the other surviving mage from Starkhaven, he looked pained.

"Oh I will release her when I want to, but first her sister will learn what is like to face a blood mage." Leigh watched in horror as Thrask's body was lifted off the ground, a silent scream of fear and pain as Grace drained his life blood to fuel her spell. Anders tried to move to block the spell from hitting Leigh, but he was blown back by the Templars Grace had enthralled. His mana drained away, as did his physical strength. Ashlyn ran pass him, slicing the Templars in the throats as she went.

"Isabela help Anders. Keep those bastards off of him." Ashlyn grunted as she pushed the the Templar she was fighting back. Anders scanned the battle for Leigh. A lyrium potion was thrust into his hand by Alian who had picked up Bethany moving her away from danger.

"Drink it, it will help." Anders drank down the potion and felt his energy returning. "Here comes more Templars. It looks like the Knight Captain." He turned and saw Cullen racing toward them. The man had his sword drawn. Cullen saw Bethany's body laying still near Anders and his heart dropped to his feet. He skidded to a stop, dropping down to his knees.

"What did they do to her?"

"Grace used blood magic to bind her. I...I will have to use it again to free her." Cullen nodded slowly at Alian giving him permission to do what he had to. The young mage slit his wrist, calling forth the magic to break the spell. Bethany moaned and stirred, her eyes fluttered open and she was greeted by a relieved sob from Cullen.

"What...how did I get out here? The last thing I remember was going into my room, then nothing." Bethany shivered and clung to Cullen. "Wait if you are here Anders, where is my sister?"

"She is fighting Grace."

"But Grace is a blood mage. Leigh can't fight her, she end up getting killed." Bethany pushed Cullen away and ran deeper into the encampment. Aveline, Isabela and Ashlyn were still fighting the enchanted Templars. The sand around them turned red with blood.

"Maker's mercy. It's like the Tower all over again."

"Pull yourself together Cullen."

"You were there too Anders you can't tell me this does not make your blood run cold."

"It does, but we will be of no help to anyone if we are frozen with fear."

"Anders, hurry!" Isabela's voice was thick with fear. "Aveline is hurt!" Bethany got to the warrior first and began to heal the belly wound she had received. "That bitch put up a barrier we can't get to Hawke and she is wounded badly too." Through the glowing barrier Anders could see Leigh holding her side, bleeding from cuts that seemed to cover most of her torso. He let Justice loose to try to break through, but even his powers did not seem to put a dent in it. He howled with rage, screaming for Leigh to run. Grace's wicked laugh could be heard echoing of the sides of the rock face.

"What's the matter Champion, you can kill a Qunari, but have trouble with a little bit of magic? I have to thank your friends for slaying all those Templars for me. It saves me the trouble and their blood is fueling my magic. I am going to enjoy bleeding you dry." Grace raised her hands, the world seemed to shift and the air got deathly still. The ground under Leigh's feet began to shake and her body was lifted off the ground by a wave of magic. She struggled as Grace shot blades made of blood at her, cutting her further. "The more you struggle the more I enjoy this."

Leigh could hear the demons coming even before they tore through the tear in the Veil Grace had opened. Shades, rage and desire demons all converged on her helpless bleeding form. "_Command them!" "What? How do I command demons?" "You did it before at Ostagar." "I was desperate to save Carver from the darkspawn." "Is this not as life threatening as then? You have to stop hiding what you are, embrace your power and your role in the world and show this bitch who she is dealing with!" _Leigh gritted her teeth and tried to call her magic to bare. "_Could you do something about the massive blood lose Pash or should I just let her kill me?"_ White light arced through her body closing her wounds almost instantly. Leigh could feel strength returning to her body as well as her mana building to it's most potent. Grace had taken her eyes off Leigh to taunt the others stuck behind the barrier.

"Don't worry once I am done with her you are all next." Leigh broke the spell holding her in the air and let her body slump to the ground. The demons rushed forward to claim her, hissing and growling at each other to be the first to rip her apart. This caught Grace's attention and she squealed with glee. "She is yours now do my bidding and kill her!"

"I have another idea Grace. I think you need a taste of your own medicine." Leigh stood up and to Grace's shock was uninjured. The demons coward away from her, starting to retreat. "**Stop and heed my commands!"** Leigh's hands stretched out and red tendrils shot from her fingertips anchoring Grace to the spot. The woman's eyes went wide with horror as the demons closed in on her. Leigh's eyes glowed a deep red making her look more fearsome then any of the demons that stood before her.

"Wait, how can you do this you are no mage?"

"Your right Grace, I am much more than that, but sadly you will not be around to find out what I truly am. You threatened my sister and my friends, for that you will be shown no mercy. Blood magic always comes with a price and now it is time to pay yours just like Decimus." The tendrils slammed Grace into the rock face holding her there for the demons. "**Take her to the Void with you."** Grace screamed as the demons carried her off to the tear in the Veil. The barrier shattered with a flick of Leigh's wrist, but her friends were rooted to the spot. Only Anders had ever truly seen her like this and it was years before. Again the witch's words echoed in his head. She had commanded demons without the use of blood magic. They feared her. When the last of the demons slipped through the tear Leigh sealed it then collapsed to the ground. Anders went to run to her only to be held back by Ashlyn.

"She might be possessed."

"She already is Ash and you know that, now let go." Bethany and Cullen could only stand there staring at Leigh while Anders tried to revive her. "Love open your eyes." Her eyes cracked open and the red glow remained. "Are you hurt?"

"No, just drained."

"I knew you were powerful, but that..."

"Now do you see why I was bound. Maker what did I do? I should have just killed her myself instead of letting those demons have her."

"I have only known blood mages to be able to command demons."

"I can without it, but it is not something I ever want to do again. It makes my skin crawl." Leigh looked over his shoulder and saw the expressions on the others faces. Leigh sighed and laid her head back down on the ground. "I guess now they are scared of me."

"I would say so, yes."

"I was sure you would be too or at least Justice would be out here wagging his finger at me."

"He wants to, but he knows Pash will stop him. As for me being frightened of you, I'm not. I know you all too well to know you would never turn to blood magic, not after what happened to your mother and Merrill's clan."

"Tell that to them. Even your commander looks jumpy."

"I'll talk to them. I want you to stay here and rest for a moment. You need to get control of your mana I can feel it still rising."

"Another of the dangers I pose." She gave him a weak smile and closed her eyes. Anders stood up and walked back to the others. Bethany was the first to find her voice.

"How did she do that?" Anders explained it all, at least what of it he knew. Leigh was still very closed lipped about some of the details of what she was. He wasn't not sure if it was because she did not know or Pash would not let her say. "That's impossible, why didn't she tell at least me. I would have understood."

"It was part of the binding spell she wasn't aloud to tell anyone. Your father was the only one to know."

"So this spirit has been inside her all this time, just as you have Justice?"

"No, she was held in Leigh's amulet." Realization snapped in Bethany's brain and her hands flew to her mouth to stifle a cry.

"So when I broke the stone I let her out!"

"If you hadn't Leigh would not have survived."

"What kind of spirit is it?" Anders smiled.

"Compassion."

"That fits my sister."

"Yes it does." None of the others noticed Cullen had wandered away from them to where Leigh was resting. He was torn between his duty and his feelings. What he saw her do chilled him to his very core, but this was Leigh, a woman he once loved. Now that he had feelings for her sister, could he hurt Bethany by taking her sister from her?

"I know your there Cullen." Leigh lifted herself on her elbows and stared at him. He winced at the sight of her glowing red eyes. Again thoughts of the Kinloch Hold flooded back to him again. "I must look absolutely frightening for you to look at me like that."

"No scarier than when you threw the dagger at me after..." He tried to smile, but he couldn't. Leigh brought her hand up to cup his cheek, Cullen winced and pulled back a little. She looked up at him and the pain etched in her face hurt him.

"After my father died. Remember what I asked you?"

"What would you do if I was a mage? I remember."

"Well I'm a mage, so I ask again what will you do now that you know I am a mage?"

"I...I will do nothing. You saved me from Wilmod, you forgave me for what happened before your father died. I will never harm you Leigh. Anders told us everything, Bethany is shaken up."

"I can imagine. Not everyday you find out your older sister is a mage, when all your life you thought she was just a sneaky bitch."

"Your not a bitch, but I do remember you being very sneaky. Not too many people can break into a dorm filled with Templars and do what we did together without getting caught." Leigh snickered, recalling the memory. "So when does the glowing go away?"

"Not sure, normally right away, I just hope it doesn't stay like this permanently it will kill my ability to sneak up on people." Cullen gave her a exasperated look, shaking his head.

"Most people would be more worried that they would be hunted by Templars and you are afraid of not being able to sneak up on people because your eyes are glowing a hellish red. Sweet blood of Andraste Leigh."

"I was never one to have a normal way of thinking." He gave a short laugh and smiled ruefully at her. Leigh sighed and slammed her head back on the sandy ground. "I hate this. I have asked over and over why me, but I guess everyone does that a least once in their lives."

"Yes they do..." The sound of footsteps behind both of them made Cullen turn around. Bethany cautiously made her way to Cullen's side, but kept as much distance between herself and Leigh. "Are you alright Beth?"

"Yes, no...I don't know. How am I suppose to feel about this? My sister just commanded demons!" Leigh jumped to her feet and stormed away from all of them. Aveline stepped to go after her, but Anders held her back.

"Give her a moment."

"Why aren't you going after her?" Before he could answer Bethany ran after the retreating form of her sister.

"Leigh wait!" The older woman turned around and Bethany stopped her gate for a second, scared of the glowing eyes and the hard expression on her sister's face. "I..." Leigh held up her hand to silence her sister.

"I wanted to tell you. I use to watch you and Papa work magic together and all I wanted was to be able to do it too. I know you don't want to be a mage, you wanted a normal life. If I could give that to you Beth I would. I would rather they hunt me instead of you."

"So this is why Papa looked so sad when he would see you watching us?"

"I guess, he felt responsible for what happen to me, though it was never his fault. I have no idea why I am the way I am, but it has nothing to do with Papa being a mage. It just is what it is."

"So you have all this power?" Leigh knew what was coming, but she prayed her sister would not open up that old wound. "You could have saved Carver! You could have killed all those darkspawn and our home would still be there! Why didn't you try! It's your fault!" Bethany beat her fists on Leigh's shoulders and all Leigh could do was stand there, letting her let out grief she never really expressed. "You could have protected me from the Templars and you didn't! I..." The words died in her mouth when she saw Leigh's face turn sadder then she had ever seen it.

"You hate me."

"Leigh..." Leigh turned away from her sister. Her shoulders slumped and shaking. Bethany reached out her hand to put it on her sister's shoulder, but Leigh flinched and stepped away.

"Don't, I understand. I hate myself! It's my fault all of it! Papa, Carver and Mama are dead because I wasn't strong enough or fast enough to save them. All this power and I can't even protect the people I love." Bethany had never seen her sister doubt herself ever. It frightened her more than anything else in the world. Leigh had always been the strong one, the leader. To see her broken like this made her angry. Mostly at herself for even thinking she hated her sister, but for her sister to believe that she could really hate her.

"No you don't understand Leigh, you have sacrificed everything to protect our family. You had a chance at a normal life, yet you gave it all up to save us all from the Qunari. You stopped them from taking Isabela and from killing all those nobles. If that stone on your amulet had not been broken and you had not been injured this would have never happened right?"

"Hindsight is crystal clear Bethany. I can't change what happened, any of it. If I could have stopped the darkspawn I would have. The power I have can't stop an army. I can handle possibly a dozen Templars, maybe twenty normal soldiers. I am not all powerful, only the Maker is and he has been silent for over a thousand years, maybe longer than that."

"You can take on Templars?"

"Yes, their spells don't work on me like that would you or Anders. I feel the drain, but it does not take my mana away completely."

"And the fact you know how to fight without magic you have an advantage most mages never have."

"I know, Papa wanted me to be able to do something. When I was bound it felt like I lost most of who I was. I needed to find something that would fill the void my magic left. Being a rogue is much like being a mage. You have to do everything just right or it can blow up in your face."

"Like the time you tried to make miasma bombs in the kitchen and we all had to sleep in the barn for three days til the house aired out?"

"Exactly." Bethany put her hand on Leigh's shoulder and squeezed it. "If I could take your place in the Gallows I would Beth."

"I would never let you do that. You would die there. You need to be free."

"They never would be able to hold me regardless."

"Leigh I know your strong, but the walls of the Gallows are hard to escape. It is not like you could blow a hole in them." Leigh smiled at her sister and nodded to the rock jutting out of the water not more than a hundred yards from where they stood. It stood over ten feet out of the water and had to weigh a few tons. A deafening crack followed a small wave of her hand. Everyone that had been standing at a distance from the sisters came running just in time to see the rock crumble into the ocean.

"Walls can be broken. I don't ever plan on letting them get me Bethany. Once you are out of Kirkwall and back safe in Ferelden I plan on moving on. To where I don't know, but I need to get Anders away from here. In time I hope to return home."

"What about the others?'

"I...I will miss them, but they don't need me here. Fenris is safe now that Danarius is dead, Varric is living high on the nug as he says, Merrill I will probably take with us for a while til we can find her another clan no that hers is gone. Aveline has Donnic and is happy being a guard. Sebastian will either take back his home or not, the choice is his. Isabela has a ship now which means she can come and go as she wants. I can leave knowing they will be alright Beth. Nothing is holding me here once you leave."

"What about Uncle Gamlen or our cousin?"

"I will leave Charade the estate. She is an Amell after all it is as much hers as it is ours. She can take care of Gamlen."

"You have it all figured out then?"

"I hope so, I never liked being here. I miss home, I need open fields and forests, not dirty crowded cities. That's why Papa left here. He hated it here."

"I heard rumors he was resigned to his fate here til he met mother. Then he became rebellious."

"Mama was pregnant with me when they left here. He did not want the Chantry to take me from them.

"Papa went to great lengths to make sure you and Mama were safe."

"I wish he could have done the same for you."

"Oh, that would be great, having a bunch of mages running around with spirits in them instead of demons. It has really worked out well for Anders." Leigh opened her mouth to argue, but snapped it shut. She knew her sister was right. Justice had been pushing Anders harder and harder of late. He was not the man she had fallen in love with. She saw flashes of him, but even they were few and far between. "So the one you have, what is she like?"

"Pash is kinda like the wise aunt we always wanted. She is kind, compassionate, and has a answer for almost everything. Unlike Justice she does not assert herself over my will."

"So she doesn't make you glow all blue and scary?"

"No. I glow all red and scary, when they are both out it makes a eerie purple light, at least that is what I am told. She can control Justice though so that is a plus right?"

"So compassion is stronger than justice?"

"Mercy stays the hand of justice."

"Ah, got it. So what now?"

"I try to get Meredith out of power and help ease some of the tensions she has caused. You my dear sister are going to Ferelden."

"What? But I can't leave Cullen here."

"He will be going with you."

"He told me what happened in the Circle there and what happened to him. I can't do that to him."

"Who said you were going to Kinlock Hold? You my dear little sister are going to apprentice under Senior enchanter Wynne, the royal court mage."

"We are going to Denerim? How...?"

"Thank the queen of Ferelden when you see her." Bethany's eyes widened. "The king and she were here to take our countrymen home and asked to see me. I guess word got back home of what I did here."

"Papa always said the name Hawke would rise again. I always thought it would be Carver making a name for himself as a great warrior."

"He was a great warrior and an even better brother."

"I know you two butted heads, but he did love you. He envied how you could step into any situation and come out on top."

"And I envied how close the two of you were when we where younger. I felt left out."

"It all changed when my magic showed up. Carver was never the same around me after that."

"I know, he didn't understand."

"But you did. You were always the go between with us." Leigh grinned at Bethany then turned to see the others staring at her.

"So am I still glowing?" She asked Anders as he walked over to her. His face had an annoyed look to it.

"It looks like it is fading now." Anders gestured to the now crumbled rock. Leigh just shrugged her shoulders at him. "This is not a game of show off Leigh or did you forget there is a Templar here? You don't need to draw attention to us anymore than is already there." His words dripped venom making her recoil.

"I trust Cullen!" She can see the blue glow of Justice showing through, but the voices were mixed so she knew they were Anders words too.

"Trusting a Templar is idiotic, and I know you are not foolish Leigh. Why put your faith in him?"

"They said the same thing to me about you and I still have faith in you. I have known Cullen for more than half my life. I know he will not hurt me or my sister." Anders growled, throwing his hands in the air and walked away. Ashlyn went to stop him, but Leigh grabbed her hand. "Let him go."

"There are other Templars out there waiting. With as angry as he is do you really want him alone." Leigh opened her mouth to answer only to feel Pash yell a warning in her head. Leigh spun on her heels and raced up the hill. She found Anders surrounded by Templars and on his knees. One of them held a brand in their hands, seeing it made her panic. She knew what it was and she would be damned if she was letting them use it on the man she loves. Without thinking she threw a miasma flask into their ranks and put herself between the brand and Anders.

"Leave him alone!"

"This is Templar business Champion. He is an apostate and needs to be neutralized."

"You have no right."

"Yes, we do. The Knight Commander has been watching him for sometime and wants him taken care of."

"Over my dead body you sanctimonious prick." Two of the Templars fellows grabbed her arms in attempt to move her, but Leigh held her ground. "You Templars think you are so righteous and so strong, I wonder what would you do if you came across a mage who can fight back?" With that Leigh took to the two men holding her and cracked their heads together. With one fluid motion she swept her leg and knocked the brand holder off his feet. "Not so tough now are you?" The other Templars closed in on her and Anders as she drew her blades.

"Enough, Lieutenant stand down now!" Cullen had made his way up the hill with the others close behind him. Bethany gave her sister a warning glance to let him handle it further. "This man is a Grey Warden and not under our jurisdiction."

"If he is a Grey Warden than I am the King of Ferelden." Some of the brand holder's fellows snickered, but Cullen was not amused. He cuffed the man and growled in his face.

"I happen to know the King of Ferelden and you demean his name comparing your sorry ass to him. I am still the highest rank here and you will do as I say and stand down or I will let his Commander do what she must." The men turned and saw Ashlyn draw her wicked looking blades. Her face painted in her customary death mask made them all take notice. "I thought as much. Head back to the Gallows and yes that is an order!" The men did not hesitate to leave, it would have been comical if the situation had not been so dire. Leigh knelt down next to Anders who's face was a mask of pure fear. Her hand gently touched his cheek and he flinched away.

"Love it's alright, their gone. Your safe." He turned his gaze up to her face, but the blank look remained. "Anders, please talk to me say something."

"You should have let them do it." His voice was so soft Leigh was not sure she heard him right.

"What?" Anger filled his voice and his expression as he gripped her shoulders painfully.

"You should have let them do it!" Leigh gasped in shock and from the painful grip that held her slender shoulders. "They could have hurt you or worse figured out what you are. How could you be so stupid!"

"Anders let her go now!" At hearing Ashlyn's voice he dropped his hands off of Leigh and stood up. "What has gotten in to you?"

"Nothing Commander."

"Bullshit! You are acting like...like...Maker I have no words for what you are doing. This is not you."

"Maybe this is me and you never really wanted to except it." He looked down at Leigh and saw she was shaking. It took all of his strength not to drop to his knees and beg for her forgiveness. He had to stay on the path he had laid out to keep her safe. Even if it meant torching his relationship with her. It would make it far easier on her if she hated him, though it killed him to think she ever could. He stormed off again and this time no one tried to follow. Bethany wrapped her arms around her sister and tried to calm her down. Leigh just watched his retreating form with wide eyes. She felt like she had been slapped across the face by the one person she never expected it from. Ashlyn step next to Cullen who was still standing in a guarded stance.

"Cullen thank you for stepping in. I know after what happened at the Tower your feeling toward mages was severely shaken."

"It was, but the love of a good woman has changed that." Cullen smiled down at Bethany who returned it. "Not all mages are dangerous as long as they remember to have compassion."

"Truer words have rarely been spoken. You have come a long way for that day, I am glad to see it."

"As am I. I need to get Bethany and Alian back. Explaining this will be difficult."

"I will come with you and try to help explain. Hopefully I still have the silver tongue my husband swears I do."

"Thank you Warden Commander." Cullen turned to Leigh who was now on her feet. The dead look still in her eyes as he drew her into an embrace. "Your secret is safe with me. Once I am gone from Kirkwall you need to get him and yourself out of here. I have been able to steam the tide away from you, but Meredith is getting worse and I fear for your safety."

"I have no desire to stick around here after you and my sister are gone. I...We need to get as far away from Kirkwall as possible, then maybe I will get the man I love back."

"I hope so for both of your sakes." Leigh kissed Cullen on the cheek and turned to her sister to say goodbye for now. The group stayed together til they got back to the city. Leigh broke away from the three women once they were back in Hightown.

"Hawke where are you going, your home is that way?"

"I'm not going home right now. I need to clear my head."

"We can come with you if you want."

"No, it's alright Aveline I just want to be alone for right now. And please don't try to follow me, I don't need a babysitter."

"Hawke..." Leigh slipped into the shadows and vanished before any of them could get her. "Flames, I hate when she does that. I swear she turns into mist and just floats away."

"I had a mage friend who could do that. It is quite unnerving and I'm a rogue who prides herself in not being seen or caught."

"I want to find Anders and wring his neck for what he said to her. Who the fuck does he think he is?"

"I don't know anymore Isabela, I thought I knew the man better than most, but now I am not so sure. He was a little bitter when I met him, but now...now he is different. I wonder if it is because of Justice." Both women voiced their opinion on the matter before parting. Ashlyn headed back to the Amell estate hoping to find Anders and to figure out why he was being such a prig, but before that she went to the Gallows to help Cullen.

OoO

Leigh went to the one place she knew none of her friends would think to look for her, The Blooming Rose. She sat at the bar and tried to drown her sorrows. It had been years since she had gotten drunk. She was more than half way to being three sheets to the wind. She assumed the sour expression on her face scared away any person that had a idea of asking her to join them in their room. Even the bartender was quiet, only coming near her when she tapped her fingers on the bar to refill her drink. She had no clue how long she had been sitting there, nor did she care. She could still feel the sting of Anders' words in her ears and on her heart. The whiskey was dulling it, but not enough for her tastes. Ever the rogue she spent the time listening to other conversations in the room. Some she wished she had not eavesdropped on because of their depravity, others she thought she could use to her advantage if she took the Viscount's seat.

The thought of taking the seat made her shake her head bitterly. She couldn't take that position and continue to let herself and Anders suffer in this Maker forsaken city. Even the errant thought of him made her want to cry, but she had shed enough tears in the last few months. Every morning of late she had been waking up cold and alone. Every day she prayed for just a glimpse of the man she fell in love with and every day it became more obvious that man was gone. He had been consumed by the plight of mages and his hatred of the Chantry. Her Anders was gone and she did not understand why. Why would he push her away when she was the only thing standing between him and the Templars? Was he trying to get himself killed?

"Hawke?" Leigh wheeled around on her bar stool and came face to face with Sebastian.

"I knew you weren't as wholesome as you claim to be Choir Boy." Her words were not slurring yet, but it was clear by the glassy look of her eyes that she was inebriated.

"I am here to counsel one of the women that works here. Why are you here and alone?" Leigh turned herself back around staring at the back wall of the bar. She tipped the shot glass back and let the burning liquid slide down spreading fire all the way to her belly. She tapped for another and was refilled quickly.

"I just needed sometime to myself. So please run along, go back to the Chantry and leave me to my drinks."

"Are you alright?"

"Just fine, so don't you worry about little old me. I can take care of myself and anyone else who comes along." She said a silent prayer that he would leave her alone, but the feeling of his hand on her shoulder told her he was not leaving.

"Even with the alcohol I can see your in pain. I am here if you need to talk." He settled himself on the stool next to her and asked the bartender for water. Leigh growled a sigh and slumped her head into her folded arms. She looked up at the man waiting on them and motioned for him to come closer.

"Give me a bottle of what you have been serving me. Put his drinks on my tab and keep the change." Once she had the bottle in her hands she slammed a few gold coins on the bar and stormed out. Sebastian was close behind her. He grabbed her shoulder and wheeled her back around to face him. "Leave me alone Sebastian! I am not in the mood for company or to talk!"

"Hawke what happened?"

"Nothing! Maker, are you deaf or just stupid. I...Don't...Want...To …...Talk!" The pain that crossed his face snapped her anger, making her feel like such a bitch. Tears started to fall from her eyes unbidden and she slumped to the ground. "Oh Sebastian, I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry. I have no right to take this out on you." Her pitiful sobs only became louder when she felt his arms wrap around her, pulling her into him. He let her cry just as he had years before when her sister was taken by the Templars.

"Let's get you off the ground and out of the cold."

"I...I don't want to go home."

"Then I will take you with me to the Chantry. It is late enough I can sneak you in to my room without anyone seeing."

"Your room?"

"You need to sleep Hawke." She just nodded and let him help her up. "Let me have the bottle, I think you have had enough for the night."

"No, I paid for it and I plan to drink it. I need this tonight. All my life I have had to keep control to make sure everyone is safe. Just for tonight I want to be free. I don't want to feel anything."

"This is not the way to deal with your pain. You can't bury it under whiskey, believe me I tried."

"Sure, you were a wild boy right?"

"I was a rake." Leigh eyed him suspiciously, but his eyes told her he was not lying. "I was a horrible person, a shame to my kin. The Chantry made me a man."

"A good man." Leigh brought the bottle to her lips and took a deep pull. His hands took the bottle from her and he brought it to his lips. It had been years since he had tasted anything other than sacramental wine during Chantry services. The whiskey burned, but it felt good. "Good isn't it?"

"I had almost forgotten..." His eyes met hers and he smiled.

"Sometimes it is good to forget."

"Come on, we should get out of the cold." Leigh took his hand and they made their way to the Chantry. She leaned heavily on him as the whiskey finally hit her hard. To her credit she kept her mouth shut so as not to wake the rest of the people in the Chantry. Once in his room the two continued to talk and drink.

OoO

When Leigh did not come home Anders really started to worry. Neither Bodhan or Orana had seen her since she had left the house with him a over two days ago. He kicked himself mentally for screaming at her like he had. His fear for her outweighed his sense. He sat down in his chair and buried his hands in his face. A low growl of frustration escaped his lips.

"You have no one to blame but yourself for yelling at her." Ashlyn was leaning against the door jam with her arms crossed staring at him.

"I know, I know. I don't need you to rub my face in it."

"You better check your attitude Anders, or do you forget I can kill you before you can say mana."

"Ash...I'm sorry."

"You have been saying that a lot recently, but do you mean it?"

"I'm trying to protect her!"

"It looks like she can take care of herself. I have never seen anything like her, not even Flemeth."

"Flemeth? You know Flemeth?"

"Knew, I...I had to kill her to save my friend Morrigan."

"Well I hate to tell you she is still alive. She had Leigh bring a piece of her in an amulet in exchange for helping her and her family escape the Blight."

"Morrigan did warn me she would not be truly dead, but that is disturbing. Do you think Flemeth knew what Leigh was?"

"I don't know and I pray to never find out. If legends are true, she would devour Leigh for her power."

"I doubt she would be able to, not with the spirit guarding her."

"I have to find her Ash."

"I hope you plan on begging and groveling for a while after you do. If Alistair ever talked to me the way you did to her, I would be handing him his balls on a silver platter." Anders hand involuntarily went to cover his manhood as his body curled in on itself."

"How does that man survive you?"

"He has learned to never question me or treat me like a fragile flower. Leigh and I are a lot alike in personality so I suggest you stop trying to protect her and let her know what the hell you are are planning. You might be surprised by her. She has as much to lose as you do. Don't you think if she loses you it will kill her?"

"She deserves better."

"You keep saying that, but you know as well as I do she doesn't want better, she wants you. Let this go Anders and come back to Ferelden with us."

"I can't leave it as it is here. What about the mages if they are left under Meredith's rule? How can I leave them when I am walking around free and happy til the fucking Taint takes me?"

"Sometimes you have to pick and choose which battles you can win and which ones you have to walk away from. This battle will get you and everyone you love killed if your not careful." When he did not answer her Ashlyn turned to leave. "You did not tell her did you?"

"Tell her what?"

"About what it means to be a Grey Warden, that you only have about another twenty to twenty five years to live. She doesn't know does she?"

"No."

"Anders, you have a choice to make, be happy with what you have and make the best of what time you have left or throw everything the Maker has given you away. If I were you I would take joy in the fact you have someone who loves you. I am going to go look for her I suggest you stay here and think about what to say to her when she comes home. Unless you would like to go back to sleeping in that cesspool in Darktown." Ashlyn pet Tovis on her way out the door leaving Anders to his thoughts. His mind wondered to where she could be, if she was alright. He paced the floor in the study til exhaustion forced him to go to their room and lay down. He kept himself awake staring at her empty side of the bed.

"_What am I doing?" "What do you mean Anders?" "Can I truly hurt her like this? Is it far kinder for me just to leave and give this fight up?" "What of the ones left behind? Will they not receive the justice they deserve? Will you abandon them yet again just so you can act like a normal man, while they suffer? You asked me to help you fight this war now I will see you make good on your words." "What if I just want to..." "NO! Justice must be done." "What we are planning is not justice it is murder." "Isn't that what they do to mages everyday Anders? Blood must be repaid in blood." "That sounds more like vengeance." "Is that not what I have become?"_


	21. Chapter 21

_Anders had this same nightmare many times before. Karl standing with his back to him in the Chantry, only to turn around, showing that ugly red sun brand. Guilt of not being able to save Karl made this dream recurring for months after he had died. Leigh had walked in on a few of such dreams when they first started becoming friends. She had held him many times after such dreams. Now he was back here again and Leigh was not home. It was his fault she wasn't home with him. If he had not acted like such and ass Leigh would have woken him up by now. His could not help his feet moving to take him up the stairs. His heart pounded under his ribs the closer he got to the top on the stairs. The figure standing were Karl had stood was emerged in shadow. The nearer he got the more he wanted to wake up. _

_The person turned around and Anders screamed. Haunting gray eyes met his amber ones, but there was nothing there. The woman he loved was gone. A angry red sun was burned into her forehead. He fell to his knees and cried. The shell that was now Leigh moved to him, movements choppy, nothing like the fluid rogue he knew. _

"_Serah, please get off the floor. The place to pray is down in front of the alter." The chinking of armor made Anders jump to his feet. Meredith stood before him smiling. Anger welled in Anders and Justice threatened to surface._

"_I will make you pay for this Templar!"_

"_Your the reason she met this fate mage. She gave herself over to us to save your life." Horror flooded through him, then rage. "Now that she can no longer protect you it is your turn. Hold him!" Out of nowhere hands took hold of him and Anders felt his mana drain away. Leigh stood there staring at him, but made no move to help. Anders stopped struggling and slumped down to the floor. Meredith had the Tranquility brand in her hand and made her way toward him. The last thing he felt was the brand burning into his skin and he screamed._

Both Bodahn and Orana tried to wake Anders, but he remained unconscious and thrashing. When he started to scream Orana backed away from him.

"What is wrong with him?" Bodahn having traveled with Wardens before knew about the nightmares and swore to Ashlyn he would keep the secret.

"He is a mage, he must be battling in the Fade. Please go get the Warden Commander. She is staying at the Hanged Man with Lady Isabela." Orana nodded and left to do as she was asked. "Master Anders wake up! By the stone where is Serah Hawke?" The sound on light footsteps behind the dwarf made him jump. Leigh rushed in the room and dropped her dagger belt on the floor.

"Please go get me a cold wet rag!"

"Yes messare."

"Anders wake up!" His body continued to spasm and it took all her strength to hold him down. "Whoever said mages are weaklings never had to stop one from thrashing." Bodahn had returned handing her the cloth and she pressed it to her lover's head. "I have it from here Bodahn. I'm sorry I should not have stayed out all night and left you to deal with this."

"I sent Orana to get the Warden."

"Good when she gets here tell her to come right up." The dwarf bowed and left the room. Leigh turned her attention back to the man shaking in her arms. "Please love wake up." Leigh tried everything she knew to wake him, but to no avail. The look of pure fear on his face made her feel helpless. She had one other thing she could do, she slapped him hard across the face. Bloodshot amber eyes flew open, then turned blue. "Justice, wait!"

"Why did you strike us?"

"I could not wake you. It was all I could think of."

"He was dreaming."

"I know, but that is the worst nightmare I have ever seen him have." The spirit sat up and rubbed his temples. "What was he dreaming about?"

"You...made Tranquil."

"Ah."

"I warned him that you would be a distraction." Leigh glared at Justice and shook her head.

"I thought you and I were past all this? I have done nothing but try to help both of you with your cause only to be shut out in the cold. I love him Justice. I would kill and die for him. What more do you want from me?"

"Let us go." The pain in his voice brought tears to her eyes.

"We can't. Pash loves you even though she knows you can't return it. I love Anders and do not want to know a world without him being with me."

"We will only end up hurting both of you. We can't bare the thought of it."

"Is this you talking or him?"

"Both of us. We are walking a path you both will not be able to follow. A path we would never let you follow."

"That is not your decision is it? I am not a child Justice and I have every right to do with my life what I will, and I want to help." Strong hands gripped her shoulders painfully and stern glowing eyes stared into hers.

"You have no idea what you ask. Have you no sense of self preservation?"

"Not if I lose him." Amber eyes returned blinking back tears. A mournful sob escaped his lips and her collapsed into Leigh's arms. "I'm here, shhh."

"I'm so sorry love, I never should have..."

"Don't do this to yourself. I'm right here and will not leave your side ever. It will take a lot more than you yelling at me to chase me away." Ashlyn stood in the doorway and watched. Leigh knew she was there as did Anders with his taint sense so to speak, but neither acknowledged her presence. "Don't you know anything Anders?"

"Huh?"

"Hawks once they find their mates stay with them for life."

"It's true Anders my brother lost his hunting hawk that way. He found his mate and never came back." Leigh gave Ashlyn a grateful look. "I told you one of these days someone would get you and you never believed me." Anders gave a exacerbated sigh and leaned his head on Leigh's shoulder. He felt her fingers twist in his hair making him relax even more.

"Where did you go?"

"I wandered around for a while trying to cool my temper. I was furious with you and did not want to have a knock down drag out fight when I got home so I stayed away."

"We were all worried about you. Varric couldn't even find out where you were."

"When I don't want to be found, you won't find me. It use to drive Carver crazy."

"So you wandered Kirkwall all night by yourself?" Anders' voice rose a few decibels. It wasn't an angry voice, but it did make Leigh wince a bit.

"I can take care of myself dear."

"I...I know that, but Maker what if the Templars found you?"

"Normally they travel in packs of no more than ten. I can handle that many, magic or no."

"Love I don't doubt your fighting prowess, but ten Templars? Leigh not even you are that good." Leigh just chuckled a bit and let it go. She did not want to fight with him.

"Well if you now have your wayward love I have things to get done before I leave Kirkwall. I am sure I will see you both again before I head back to Ferelden. I will be personally escorting your sister back home Hawke."

"I can not thank you, the king and queen enough for that. I can rest much easier knowing my sister is safe."

"They were pleased to do it. As am I. Anders behave yourself and yes that is an order." She gave a bow and left the estate leaving Anders and Leigh alone.

"So are you still angry with me for using magic on the coast?"

"I wasn't angry with you love, I just...I'm afraid to lose you."

"I told you before you would never lose me. I plan on being around a long time."

"I hope so. I love you and it will kill me if anything happens to you." Her hand cupped his cheek and he leaned into her caress. "How can I show you how sorry I am, how much I love you?"

"You could start by kissing me." Anders gave her a lopsided grin and claimed her lips. One kiss turned into several. Anders felt Leigh's hands start to undo the tie on his linen shirt. He smiled against her mouth and let his own hands roam to get her out off her robes. It did not take them long to get themselves out of their clothes. The feel of his weight over her was a comfort to Leigh. Times like these were becoming so rare it frightened her, to the point she thought he did not want her anymore. She pushed the feeling of shame from her mind. She knew she would have to tell him, but now was not the time. After their lovemaking both laid in each others arms sweaty and sated. "I have missed this."

"Me too love. I love you and no matter what happens, that will never change." She nuzzled his neck laying soft kisses as she went. Anders tilted his head so she could get better access to his neck. "So ready to go at it again?"

"Always, you know full well if I could find a way for us to just stay in this room and never have to leave it I would."

"Our friends would miss us."

"They could still come and visit we would just have to put clothes on from time to time."

"You are incorrigible you know that right?"

"But you love me anyway."

"Yes I do, I always will."

OoO

"Andraste's tits, why in the world would the Carta decide to attack you?" Varric paced his room in the Hanged Man with a bloody, but uninjured Hawke and Anders. "And you said they tried to kidnap you?"

"Yes, they said to take me alive. Something about them wasn't right. I have had dealing with them before and they have never done this before."

"You alright Blondie?"

"I'm more concerned about Leigh. We got separated and I overheard they say they needed her blood."

"Why didn't you tell me this?"

"I didn't want to worry you love." Varric looked between the two of them and held his hands up.

"Before this turns into a fight let me see what I can find out. Go home and I will drop by when I have anything." Putting his fingers in his mouth and letting out a sharp whistle Varric motioned to two rather large, burly men. "Please escort the Champion and her companion home." The men nodded and followed Anders and Leigh out the door. Varric continued to pace for a few more minutes thinking of who he could get information from. He had not heard Isabela come in the room.

"You look perplexed."

"Oh, hey Rivani, just trying to figure out why the Carta would want Hawke's blood."

"Other than to spill it. I know they don't like her much since she has stopped some of their bigger deals. Most of the mercenary bands hate her, which is funny since she started out as one when she first came to Kirkwall."

"It doesn't make sense, care to help me go digging?"

"Sure I have been a bit bored lately."

"Your a real humanitarian Rivani."

OoO

"So Hawke I found out where this group is hiding and it is not going to be easy to get to."

"Where is it?" Leigh was sitting on Anders lap in the over stuffed chair that sat in the study.

"The Vinmark Mountains. From what I have heard their lair is off one of the old trading routes. It is one that is no longer used so the path is a bit treacherous. I just got over going to Sundermount, but there is no way I am letting you two go without me." Leigh went to speak, but a gentle knock on the study door stopped her. Bodahn entered the room followed by Cullen. Leigh's heart stopped beating when she saw the look on his face.

"Where's Bethany! Is she alright!"

"She's fine Leigh. Orsino was able to heal both of our injuries." Leigh breathed a sigh of relief and sank back into Anders embrace.

"What happened?"

"We were heading for the ship to get out of Kirkwall and were attacked by a group of dwarves. The thing is we have no idea why we were attacked."

"They attacked Anders and I too. They wanted me, so I think when they couldn't get me they went after Bethany."

"If it had not been for the Warden and the soldiers on the boat I don't think I would be here to tell you this."

"Is Bethany well enough to travel?"

"Yes, she is waiting for me to return and we are leaving. I wanted you to hear this from me and not from the rumor mill."

"We will take you down to the docks. I have been so busy with this I forgot you both were leaving today."

"I know she will like to see you before we go."

"Let me gather my friends and we will go in force. I'm not taking any chances."

"Thank you Leigh, I will meet you down by Sol's with Bethany."

"See you soon." Leigh waited for him to leave before turning to Varric. "We need everyone here as soon as possible. Anders and I will go get the Hightown crew. Can you go get the others?"

"Sure thing Hawke. I will be back in a half hour."

"I will go get Aveline, love. I will let you get Fenris and Sebastian."

"Will the three of you never get along?"

"I doubt it. Fenris hates mages and me in particular. And please don't start me on Sebastian. He has been chasing after you since he found out I moved in here."

"He is a brother in the Chantry, Anders he does not chase."

"He is a man and yes he does. You can't tell me you haven't noticed the way he looks at you."

"I..."

"Exactly." Leigh scowled at Anders, but he did not back down. "If he could he would steal you away from me." Leigh's face fell. Pash had tried to hide the memory from her, but her will was too strong, the spirit could not erase it. She had to tell Anders what had happened and prayed to the Maker he would forgive her.

"Anders...there is something I have to...Maker..."

"Love what is it?" Fat tears tracked down from her eyes. She felt his hands on either side of her face, his thumbs brushed the tears away. She took a deep breath and told him everything that had happened two weeks prior. The look on his face felt like a dagger in her heart, a dagger she herself had placed there. Once it was all out she waited for him to explode, but he didn't, Anders just stood there staring at the floor. Leigh turned her back to him, crying silent tears. She knew she had undone everything they had together with one stupid drunken night with Sebastian. She heard him move and waited to hear the door slam or him to scream, what he did surprised her to say the least. "I drove you to it." Leigh spun around looking at him like he was mad.

"No, this is not your fault, it's mine and his. I was the one who was falling down drunk, as was he. You had nothing to do with this!"

"Yes I did. I was the one who...pushed you away. I treated you like shit Leigh. This is my fault." Anger flooded Leigh's mind most of it was at herself, but also at Anders for thinking such an idiotic thought.

"Maker's balls Anders, This...Is …..Not...Your...Fault! You might want to be the martyr for everything, but this is on me. I am the one who did not come home. I am the one who decided to get drunk and somewhere in my drunken mind I was the one who slept with Sebastian. You are blameless in this."

"I am not blameless, if I had not been such a prig out on the coast you never would have...I did this to you, to us. I tore everything we had to shreds because of my own fear and hatred. I did the one thing I never wanted to do, I hurt you. I drove you into his waiting arms, whether it was his intent or not he...took you from me."

"I don't want him! I want you, only ever you. I did not plan this. I don't even remember any of it really. Pash even went so far to try to hid it from me that is why I did not tell you when I came home two weeks ago. She thought she was protecting me. Anders I love you, but I made a horrible mistake and I...it cost me you." Neither of them looked at the other for a few minutes. Leigh slowly crept her way to be closer to him. She wanted him to push her away, to hurt her as she had hurt him. She wanted him to fight, not close down. He noticed she was right next to him, and Anders could not help himself, his arms wrapped around her pulling her close. He buried his face in her hair and wept. "I...I'm so sorry...I know what I did will never be forgiven, but I do love you Anders with all my heart. I never wanted this."

"I know love." He dropped to his knees taking her with him. His hands found her face again and held it so he could look into her eyes. "I have hurt you so much these past few months, Maker knows I deserve a worse punishment than this. There is nothing to forgive, I love you and...if you want me to leave I will."

"NO! I told you I wanted you with me til the day we die, I don't want you to leave. I'm so tired of losing everyone I love because of my failings. If I lose you I might as well just walk myself to the Gallows and turn myself into Meredith. I will have no fight left in me." Now she saw anger raise in his expression. His hands gripped her face harshly, but she did not show it.

"I would never let you do that. I would rather be made Tranquil than let that bitch anywhere near you. Leigh...I'm not going anywhere. If it takes me forever to make all this up to you I will do it. I can't lose you." His lips crushed hers as if he was trying to wash away any trace that Sebastian might have left. Anders felt her fingers twist into his hair and he lost himself in her embrace. Justice railed in his head to hunt down Sebastian for taking advantage of Leigh in her drunken state, but he drowned him out. Nothing mattered, but claiming her back, making her his again. He had to ask even though he was not sure he wanted to know the answer. "Do you love him?"

"I care for him as a friend, a brother nothing more." Her hand took his and moved it over her heart. "It beats for you and only you. You are the only one who can fill or break it, but it is yours always." Her oath made Anders' heart swell.

"Then I better take care of it."

"Yes you better."

"We need to hurry and gather the others so we can see Bethany and Cullen off."

"I will let Aveline get him."

"I think that is for the best. You will need to have Pash ready just in case Justice..."

"She is. Anders..."

"I know, we will work through this together Leigh. I have made so many mistakes when it has come to us. Your one mistake will not break us unless you want it to."

"I don't want anyone else ever. Just you and if it takes the rest of my life I will make up for this somehow."

"You have nothing to make up love, I am not going anywhere." Leigh sighed and leaned into him. Anders tucked her head under his chin. "You would have to kill me before I leave you." Guilt welled up in him. He knew if he became a murderer she would kill him, though he knew she would be far kinder than any other person to do so. Time was running out for them and it killed him to think about it. "_I warned you this would end badly." "I...it was nice to be happy if only for a little while again." "They will live Anders. Hawke and Compassion will mourn us, but our path can not be strayed from. Mages need to be free, they deserve justice." "Yes, they do. Leigh deserves to be able to be who she truly is without having to hide anymore." "She will be my friend. We will make sure of it."_ Leigh pulled away from him just a fraction so she could stare up into Anders' eyes. He could see the pain she was in and he gave her a reassuring smile. She gave him a weak one back and raised herself on her toes to kiss him. "I love you, always."

OoO

The sight of this eclectic group was impressive. It had been a long time since they had all been together. Leigh was at the head of the group with Anders less than a step behind her. The rest fell in step with Varric in the middle keeping the peace. Sebastian and Fenris brought up the rear. The people out and about moved out of the way as the group passed by. Leigh held out her hand to Anders and he took it in kind. From the back of the group Fenris growled softly.

"Do she not know she makes herself a target by doing that?" Sebastian looked up from the ground and made a face seeing the lovers holding hands like a normal couple. To those who know them there was nothing normal about them, any of them for that matter. The rogue sighed and looked away. He had tried everything to get her away from Anders, but nothing had worked. Even after the night they had shared two weeks ago she still saw him as nothing more than a brother, while she looked at Anders like he was everything. His heart ached every time he saw them together, but for as much as it hurt he could not say no to her. Sebastian would rip himself apart rather than tell her goodbye.

"She is fully aware of the danger she is in Fenris. It is her life as she keeps so eloquently telling me."

"Her fame will only save her for so long. She would do well to get on that ship with her sister today and never look back and take that abomination with her." In his head he knew it was the best thing she could do, but Sebastian's stomached dropped to his feet thinking about never seeing her again.

"I thought she was your friend? Why do you want her gone?" The elf smiled fondly at Leigh's back before answering.

"She is the greatest friend I have ever had. I do not wish her to leave, but knowing she is out there safe would take away the pain of never seeing her again. I care for her that much that I would let her go."

"You are a far better man than I Fenris." Fenris clapped his hand on the other man's shoulder. Isabela came up between them and wrapped her arms over each.

"What are you two gentlemen talking about so intently?"

"Nothing really." Sebastian tried to keep his voice disinterested. He was not about to share anything with Isabela. She had a habit of being loose lipped especially around Hawke. The two women were thicker than thieves.

"Don't they look so cute together?"

"Who?"

"Oh don't be coy, you know who. Anders and our Lady Hawke, they look simply smashing together."

"I guess so, I hadn't really noticed."

"How can you miss that. I am not a believer is true love, but I am damn sure they are as close as anyone is ever going to get. Am I right Fenny?"

"Whatever you say."

"My room, after dark is what I say." Fenris smirked and nodded his head. Isabela went up to the front of the group to antagonize Aveline. Leaving a stunned Sebastian to stare at Fenris.

"You and she...Maker's breath."

"She doesn't ask questions and she is fun to be around." Fenris shrugged and left it at that before catching up the to pirate queen. His arm slung possessively over her shoulder. They had reached the dock and found a ferry to take them across to the Gallows. Sebastian sat as far away from Leigh and Anders as he could. Guilt began to build in his heart as well as rage. Leigh acted like nothing had happened between them. She was leaning on Anders and they were talking and smiling, it made the prince sick to his stomach. Anders noticed he was staring and gently slipped away from Leigh to head toward him. Leigh grasped his hand and her expression was one of fear and shame. The mage turned back to his lady love speaking softly before continuing his course. He came and sat next to Sebastian and leaned close so no one would overhear.

"She told me what happened."

"She...she did?"

"Yes, my only question for you is did you take advantage of her drunken state?"

"No, I would never do that to her. I was...I drank with her. Years of not partaking has taken away my tolerance."

"I know why she was drinking and it was my fault. I will not let that happen again. I know you love her, and she cares very much for you, but if you ever touch her again while she and I are together I will let Justice do what he wants."

"You forgave her then?"

"There was nothing to forgive. I hurt her with my words and she turned to whiskey and you for comfort. Comfort I should have been giving her. As I said it will not happen again." Anders began to rise from the bench when Sebastian caught his arm.

"She still deserves better."

"I know, but she has made her decision and she chose me. I will not take that for granted anymore. If something happens to me I need your word that you will be there for her."

"You have it." A unspoken truce passed between the two men. Sebastian release his grip on Anders and let him make his way back to Leigh. The archer's eye met Leigh's for a second before she turned away. He saw shame and pain in her eyes. She turned away from his gaze and stared into the mage's eyes. Sebastian felt bile rising from his stomach. He had ruined his relationship with Hawke in one drunken night of passion. The desire demon was right about him. He wanted what was not his even though he knew deep down he was the better man.

OoO

Leigh stepped off the ferry and practically ran to the gate for Templar Hall. Bethany and Cullen were waiting for them. Leigh noticed Meredith standing at the gate a displeased look on her face. The Warden Commander was standing beside Bethany as well as a few well armored and armed soldiers. Bethany was wearing a cloak that covered her face in shadow. It made Leigh want to laugh since she had done the same. The closer they go the more Leigh was able to see the crest on the guards. She had only ever seen it once at Ostagar. These men belonged to the Teryn of Highever. The sight of a slight elven mage made Leigh do a double take. She had seen this woman somewhere, but for the life of her she could not remember where or when.

"It's about time sister."

"Well, you know how it is, everyone wants the Champion of Kirkwall to solve their problems."

"So you have to squeeze me in right?" Leigh rolled her eyes and stuck her tongue at her little sister. "In all seriousness I am glad you are here. I was afraid I would not be able to say goodbye to you."

"Beth this isn't goodbye. Anders and I will be coming back to Ferelden hopefully soon."

"I thought you were trying to get the Viscount seat."

"I really don't want it, but I will be trying to get the ice bitch out of it before I leave. I am hoping that won't take too long."

"I hope you can, Kirkwall deserves better." Ashlyn walked up to the sister followed by a very large armored man. His face was obscured by his helmet. The elven mage was right by his side.

"Champion this is Orianne from the Ferelden Circle. She is here on behalf of First Enchanter Irving."

"Well met Champion. I will be filling your sister and Ser Cullen in on the workings of life in the Palace. I am the court mage for Highever at the queen's request I have accompanied the Warden Commander."

"It is a pleasure." Anders made his way to Leigh's side and Orianne gasped.

"Anders? Is that you?" It took him a moment to recognize the woman.

"Ori? Maker, how are you?"

"I am doing well and may I say you look very well preserved for a dead man."

"Well the rumors are not true as you can see." Leigh raised a eyebrow at her lover. "Leigh I would like you to meet Ori, she and I were good friends in the Circle. She tried to talk me out running away most of the time."

"I just didn't want the Templars to hurt you like they hurt Jowan. You do know it was Irving that saved you most of the time right?"

"I know, I owe that man an apology, but I will not apologize for wanting to be free."

"I never expected you would. I know how much you hated being there. I did too." The elf's eyes turned haunted and Anders put his hand on her shoulder. Something passed between them.

"Rolen is dead Ori and Addler, well he can't touch you now." Recognition clicked in Leigh's brain to where she had seen this woman before, she had been at Ostagar. She kept it to herself though, for now.

"Addler wouldn't dare come near me now. He likes living too much."

"The Warden Commander is a scary woman."

"Watch it Sparklefingers. I am not the reason Addler can't get his slimy hands on her anymore. Her husband would be the reason." The large man towered over the small elf, but she just looked back and smiled at him. Ashlyn chuckled seeing the confused face on her fellow Warden. "As you can see, he would break Addler in half as well as anyone who wants to mess with him."

"Maker he reminds me of Carver, he use to stand behind me like that when we were kids." Bethany whispered in Leigh's ear.

"He did have a presence doesn't he. You know what they say..."

"What?"

"They grow em big in Ferelden." Bethany giggled and her eyes ran over Cullen.

"Yes they do."

"Bethany!"

"What you should know you had him first."

"Holy Maker, what did they teach you in the Gallows?"

"I didn't learn that from there, well not all of it. Isabela is a good teacher."

"Remind me to smack her upside the head later. She turned my sweet innocent sister into a...a..."

"Woman? I was never really that innocent Leigh, I just played it well."

"Maker save me. We should get this show on the road."

"It is kind of like the Antivan circus isn't it?" Leigh could only laugh as she looked at the very large diverse group. "Warden Commander we are ready when you are."

"Then let's be off." After finding a ferry large enough for their army, the group made their way to where the Commander had her ship. Leigh noticed the name on it and stopped walking.

"Love, are you alright?"

"The Lothering Rose?" Ashlyn came up beside her and smiled.

"When Alistair and I came through Lothering after Ostagar he found a rose in the Chantry courtyard. It was on a bush that everyone believed to be dead, but the day before we arrived it appeared. He did not want it to be destroyed by the Blight so he took it and gave it to me."

"He loved you then?"

"Still does, but he has his responsibilities and I have mine. He also has his queen whom he loves with all his heart."

"Which leave no room for you."

"He and I will always have a piece for each other. We never forget our first loves."

"No we never do." A distant look crossed over Leigh's face. She shook her head violently to clear it. "It is fitting really that this ship is the one to take my sister home."

"Hopefully one day you will come home too."

"I hope so." Bethany pulled her sister away from the others so they could say goodbye privately. "This is it. Off to bigger and better things. I'm jealous, you get to live in the palace in Denerim and I get to stay here."

"You know you could always come with us."

"No, I have things here I have to do besides you need to have your own life Beth. I know Carver hated being in my shadow I don't want you to feel the same way."

"I am going to miss you so much Leigh. Here take this so you can find me if you have to." Bethany handed her sister a small vial of blood. Leigh raised her eyebrow and dug a matching vial out of her pocket.

"Are you sure that we weren't the twins and Carver was the odd one. I had the same idea. Cullen can do what he does best and find me if you need me."

"Great mages think alike. Take care of yourself and Anders."

"I will. Go say bye to Varric before he cries. You know how much he hates to cry."

"I am going to miss all of you." Bethany went and said farewell to all Leigh's companions. Aveline screwed up her face so she wouldn't cry. Varric made jokes, but when he hugged Bethany tears showing in his eyes. Merrill had to be pried off the young mage by Isabela who in turn did not want to let her go either.

"I just got you back Kitten, and your leaving again."

"You can come and visit me. Give the nobles in Denerim something to talk about."

"I will Kitten. You better treat her right Cullen or so help me, it will be a race to see if Hawke or I get to you first." Cullen gave a audible gulp and nodded. Next came Sebastian who bowed to Bethany and kissed her hand. Fenris ever gave up his normal scowl and gave Bethany a warm hug. Anders was the last to say goodbye. He shook Cullen's hand and embraced Bethany.

"Your free now."

"I know and it is thanks to you."

"I didn't do anything."

"You did more than you will ever know Anders. Be good to my sister. She is very special even for a mage. She is so new to this, I worry it will swallow her whole. She needs you."

"And I need her. Take care Bethany." The air suddenly was filled with shouting and screaming arrows. The Carta had decided to ambush them again, but this time they brought a much larger force. Leigh and Ashlyn yelled out orders to their respective companions. Ashlyn ran down the gangplank and backflipped over a small group of dwarves that had encircled Bethany and Cullen. She slashed her way through two before noticing the blood that covered her blades was black. Just like darkspawn blood.

"Shit! Don't let their blood get on you! They carry the taint!" Anders head snapped around to meet Ashlyn's eyes. He felt it now too and put himself between the dwarves and Leigh.

"We need to end this before someone..." One of their assassins stabbed Anders from behind cutting into his lung. Leigh watched in horror as he slumped forward. The mage Orianne was closest to them and ran to help.

"Don't touch his blood." The mage gave quick nod and set to healing Anders. Her warrior husband stood back to back with Leigh to defend the ones they love. Leigh was thankful for this man's help. She could now see why Orianne said no one would be able to hurt her with him around. He was a beast, more ferocious than Fenris and much more powerful than Aveline. "Varric behind you!"

"Say hello to Bianca you bastards." Varric swung his crossbow around and shot right through three of them. "Hey Hawke, Choir boy looks like he needs help." Leigh heard the warrior behind her growl to go help Sebastian. She ran to him only to skid to a halt when the dwarves brought him to his knees, a knife to his neck.

"Stop or we will kill him!" Leigh dropped her daggers and held up her hands in surrender.

"What do you want?"

"For you to come with us. We need the Hawke." Bethany went to open her mouth, but Isabela covered it.

"I will come with you if you let him go unharmed."

"No Hawke, my life is not worth yours."

"Shut up Sebastian!"

"No..." One of the dwarves kicked the prince in the stomach making him double over. Leigh growled baring her teeth at the men.

"Leave him alone. I will go willingly just don't hurt anyone else." Leigh held up her hand to her friends behind her. Bethany noticed the vial of blood in her hand. She nodded to her sister and held the others back. "Alright take me where ever it is you want me to go." The Carta and Leigh disappeared into the shadows leaving all her friends behind.

"Cullen I need you to do what you do best."

"What?"

"Track my sister with this." She handed him the vial of blood her sister had just given her. "She gave this to me so I could find her if I had to. I know you have hunted before, now I need you to hunt Leigh." Anders groaned from where he was on the ground. Orianne helped him sit up slowly. Ashlyn was by his other side holding his shoulder.

"Thank you Ori. Did we win?" The others would not look at him and dread crept up inside him. "Where is Leigh?"

"Calm down. She...she went with the Carta so they wouldn't hurt any of us."

"Calm down! Calm down, those bastards want her blood. Normally that means cutting and perhaps killing her and you want me to clam down." "_We have to get them back!" We will Justice. Leigh gave me something to help find her if I need to. I am not letting Carta hurt them." "We need to go now Anders." _

"Anders we can track her. She gave me a vial of her blood Cullen can find her."

"I swear Anders we will bring her back safe." Cullen tried to look confident for Anders' sake, but inside he worried.

"Then let's get to this I want her back safe with us. I...I can't lose her." Bethany put her hand on his shoulder.

"Leigh can take care of herself. Those dwarves won't know what hit them." Ashlyn helped Anders to his feet and went to ship and found it damaged.

"Those sons of bitches. I have to get this fixed before we can take to sea. I have to stay behind to oversee it. Ori could you and your husband go with them to help?"

"Yes, it looks like Anders and Bethany will have enough on their minds. What do you say love?"

"Fine by me, though magey there looks like he wants to murder someone." Orianne gave her husband a stern look, but he only barked a laugh. "So what does the Carta want with that woman anyway?"

"You really don't listen when it comes to things that don't have to do with eating, sex or fighting do you love?"

"You know me to well my darling wife. I am listening now, so who is she?"

"That is the Champion of Kirkwall Leigh Hawke."

"Wait, what? That is not possible she's dead."

"I assure you she is alive and well, at least for the moment." The warrior stared out though his visor at the crowd in front of him. He saw the red haired woman and stiffened. The woman she was talking to took her hood down. The warrior could only stare at a woman he thought dead. His blue eyes glassed over with tears before turning to Ashlyn and his wife.

"Those Carta dwarves are going to know the meaning of pain when I am done with them. Come on Ori let's show them how we do things back in Ferelden." With that the warrior stomped over to the group, but let Orianne do the talking. His mind was on what he wanted to do to the Carta when they found them and on what he would say to Leigh when they rescued her. Either way he thought it was going to be ugly.


	22. Chapter 22

/

"What in the name of the Maker was she thinking?" Anders mood had not improved the further they got from Kirkwall. Cullen was having a hard time tracking Leigh through her blood, but had no idea why.

"Look Blondie, Hawke did this so none of us would get hurt."

"And what if she gets hurt or worse? What the fuck am I...how do I live without her?" Varric went silent, not wanting to think about Leigh being gone. Bethany walked beside Anders trying to be supportive, but her own dread was making it hard. She knew full well her sister was capable of taking care of herself, but not knowing where she was or what those dwarves wanted made it hard to think straight. Orianne and her husband brought up the rear of the group. The warrior had been strangely quiet since he found out who they were tracking. His thoughts were racing.

"How much farther Templar?" Cullen rubbed his temples to ease the pain his intense concentration had caused. His eyes were bloodshot from lack of sleep and worry.

"I have never had a trail go this...I guess cold would be the best word for it. It is like she doesn't exist. Anders what is she?"

"What do you mean by that?" The mage stopped walking and rounded on Cullen.

"I mean, I know a little of what she told me she is, but there has to be more to it. I spent so much time with her when we were younger and never felt magic from her. It is like she is a blind spot. Even on the coast when she was using her powers I couldn't really feel she was there. Tracking her has been difficult."

"And you call yourself a Templar, I thought they can track any mage as long as they have their phylactery." Everyone turned and stared at the warrior, who up til now had been very quiet. "She went that way."

"And how do you know this? And who said she was a mage." Anders narrowed his eyes at the warrior.

"Easy she left you a trail. See these rocks, it is an old Chastind way to mark trails and let others know what trails are safe or not." Everyone continued to stare at the warrior. "What? I grew up near the wilds, you learn things. I assumed she was a mage since you have her phylactery and the Templar here is tracking her. I thought Templars couldn't track anyone who wasn't a mage."

"They can't normally, but she has a lot of magic behind her."

"Yeah so I have heard. This trail is our best bet to find her."

"Love are you sure?" Orianne knew her husband was smarter than most would give him credit for, but even she doubted this.

"If you want follow Ser Cullen, I will go this way and we will see who gets there first." The warrior headed the way of the trail sign, followed by Anders and Varric. "Try to keep up magey I won't stop if you fall behind."

"I'm a Grey Warden. I won't fall behind."

"We'll see. You all coming or what?" Cullen sighed and nodded to Bethany to follow the warrior.

"We are running out of options and daylight. Let's hope this Champion of yours is smart enough to either escape or impede their progress."

"Knowing Hawke she has them pulling out their hair and sitting in the corner rocking. Lead on Tin Man."

"Very funny dwarf, did you think of that all on your own or did you have help."

"Watch it, Junior!"

OoO

Leigh trudged slowly trying desperately to slow her captors down. She was thankful that their legs were short and the terrain was difficult even for her to traverse. Another thing she was thankful for was they did not bind her hands. She was able to use her magic to mark their trail just in case Cullen could not track her. She hoped Bethany would recognize it.

"So why is it you want me, other than for my blood?"

"We were just told to bring the Hawke we do not question why."

"Who is it that wants me anyway?"

"We are not worthy to speak his name. He is the one who calls to us." Leigh rolled her eyes and went back to walking in silence.

"_I should just put all of these men out of their misery." "You really think that would be a good idea?" "Yes Pash I do, their tainted. How is letting them live a kindness?" "You have a point, but we must find out who is behind this or they will keep coming after you and Bethany." "Your right, but...I'm afraid what I will find. With my track record it will be something evil and horrific." "Don't be a pessimist Leigh." _

"Night is falling we will camp."

"Wonderful how much farther is it to wherever it is your taking me?"

"Rest human."

"Sure, I will get right on that." "_If you bastards think I am going to make this easy on you, you are dead wrong." "Wait til dark Leigh." "Planning on it. I really hope Bethany saw the trail I left them. I do not relish having to walk back to Kirkwall alone." "You are not alone. You never will be again." "Pash as much as I enjoy your company it is nice to have a physical being here to watch my back. No offense." "None taken, I do understand. They will come Leigh. Your friends value you highly. They will not sit by and let you be out here alone." _Leigh let out a sigh and propped herself up against a large rock. Her captors busied themselves making camp and starting a fire. It had rained the night before so whatever wood they found out here was soaked. Making a fire would be nearly impossible. Part of her wanted to help and light the fire. The other part of her knew if she was to escape she would need it dark as possible.

OoO

The warrior held up his hand, before realizing it was too dark for any of them to see it. In a unanimous vote the group wanted to press on through the night to catch up the Carta. Cullen nearly crashed into the warrior, but Anders stopped him.

"How the bloody hell can you see it is black as pitch out here?" Cullen hissed.

"One of the good benefits of being a Warden. Darkspawn can see somewhat in the dark. Mostly black and white, but I can make things out quite well."

"You really are full of surprises Blondie. What do you see?"

"I see an encampment. No fire though."

"Rained last night. They might not have been able to light one."

"Well they look like dwarves, but I don't see Leigh anywhere. They might just be merchants." A bright flash caught the groups eyes followed by screams. Anders began to run toward the camp followed closely by the warrior and Varric. The men stopped dead when they saw a fire storm surrounding the dwarves preventing them from running away. The source of the storm was nowhere to be seen. "Holy Maker!"

"Blondie?"

"I...what you think I'm doing this?"

"Well, yeah."

"I'm not this strong Varric and fire is not my thing. I'm lucky I can make fire balls to throw. Cullen?"

"This is impossible. I can't feel the mage that is doing this. I can feel the magic that brought it here, but not the source." Anders felt a hand on his shoulder making him wheel around.

"Whoa, it's me love."

"Leigh!" Before she could talk he crushed her to him. "I swear woman you need to stop doing this to me."

"I know, but I had no choice. They wanted to kill the rest of you."

I...you will be the death of me. I guess that storm would be yours." Leigh blushed a bit and looked back to her fire trap. The Carta dwarves huddled together staring at the group.

"They were talking about just...taking my blood and not in a friendly way. I guess they thought I was asleep." Anders glared at the men and growled. Leigh lifted her hands sending roots and vines to entwine her captors. Her other hand waved and the fire storm disappeared. "That should hold them for now."

"Hawke, I take it back, Aveline doesn't scare me shit-less anymore, you now claim that honor." Leigh grinned at Varric and winked. "So what now?"

"Now I find out where they were taking me and we head there."

"Sister, your safe now, we should just go back to Kirkwall."

Sorry Beth, these assholes screwed with my family and I want to find out why. It has to stop."

"It was worth a shot to talk you out of it."

"You and Cullen should go back to Kirkwall."

"Right, like that'll happen. I'm a Hawke too Leigh. This is as much my fight as it is yours."

"It was worth a try." Both sisters smiled and gave a low chuckle. "All that's missing is Carver telling us to get the lead out and it would feel like old times." The warrior let out a huff and stalked over to one of the Carta.

"Where were you taking them?" He slammed his metal covered fist into the man's face. Orianne ran and wrapped her arm around his large arm to try to stop him from doing it again. He held hit second hit for her sake.

"To the master, he needs the blood." The dwarf's clouded eyes were wide with fear.

"Then he will just have to take it from you because their blood is staying where it is."

"The master needs the blood, we serve the master."

"Bloody wonderful. Their minds are scrambled eggs. Anyone of you have any bright ideas on how to make them talk." Leigh grimaced for a moment and let out a long breath.

"Varric please take Bethany, Cullen, and Ori up over the hill."

" Leigh what are you going to do?"

"Something you do not need to see Beth. Please trust me."

"I do, but..."

"Varric please take them."

"Come on kids up the hill we go." Bethany took one final look back at her sister and followed Varric.

"Anders you might not want to be here either. What I am going to to do might border on dark magic."

"Then I'm staying just in case." Leigh smiled and squeezed his hand. "Why are you letting him stay?" Anders cocked his head in the direction of the warrior.

"He doesn't look squeamish about much. Plus do you want to try to get him to leave?"

"No, he looks like he could snap me in two if he wanted to."

"Most likely. Alright stand behind me both of you. It has been a very long time since I did this, here is hoping I am not too rusty or it will be bad for them." Leigh rolled her shoulders and tried to relax. Her eyes closed and she focused her energy into her hands. Anders could feel her magic build til it shot out of her finger tips. Red tendrils of power hit the vine entwined men in the chest. Their screams of fear were deafening.

"Leigh?" She ignored him and continued to focus on on the dwarves. Her hand lifted and another power surge pulsed through the tendrils.

"You will tell me where your master is hiding."

"Our master will have the blood, he will be free." Leigh snarled and clenched her fist. Terror turned to pain. Within seconds she released her hands, the pain ease, but the tendrils stayed in place.

"I don't want to hurt you, but I will, now answer my question."

"Our master is a days travel to the east. It is a old fort off unused trade route." Leigh ended her spell and wobbled a bit. Anders steadied her.

"Maker I hate doing that. Last time I did it I was much gentler."

"Last time?"

"It was about eleven years ago. Templars were chasing a apostate through Lothering. I...I use it on them to save him, then I hung them from trees naked." "_It is her. Maker's breath, how did I not see it before?" "She has changed as have you Anders. You said it yourself her eyes lacked the innocence of the girl you knew." "What happened to her to make her lose that innocence?" "Lose of family and home perhaps." "I have to tell her, but I'm afraid to." "Why is that?" "I don't know, maybe the fact I am planing to murder a whole bunch of people. I am not the same man she meet years ago. Maker I don't even remember who he was anymore." _"Anders?"

"Sorry love, I would have loved to see that. So what happened to the apostate?"

"He...they found him. He gave himself up for me, so I would not be taken to the Circle." The haunted look in her eyes made him pull her close. Leigh quickly wiped the tears that had started to slide down her cheeks away and nuzzled his neck. "I vowed that I would never let the Templars take another person I cared about again. Guess I screwed that up with Beth."

"That wasn't your fault in either case."

"I hate to break up your make out session, but we should gather the others and get going to find this master of theirs. First things first though, what do you want to do with them?" The warrior had stayed surprisingly silent through it all. Now he stood with his great sword drawn, ready for her to tell him he can have at them.

"Their tainted so it will be kinder to put them out of their misery."

"Then go get the others, just give me a few minutes to put them down. I will make it quick and clean." Leigh nodded, but her face showed sorrow. She hated to see lives wasted. The warrior put his hand on her shoulder and for the first time she could see his eyes hidden behind the helmet. "Their blood is on the hands of the one who did this to him not yours. Protecting your family and friends comes first always."

"I know and thank you Ser...? The warrior flinched slightly before answering.

"Malcolm and your welcome Champion. Get her out of here magey, I'll be along soon."

"Watch their blood, don't get it on you if you can."

"I served at Ostagar magey, I know the drill." Anders led her up the hill to meet back up with Varric and the others. Leigh was thankful Varric was entertaining them with a tale, keeping them from seeing what she did. Bethany rose from the ground and wrapped her arm around her sister.

"You okay, you look like you've seen a ghost?"

"Just thinking about the past."

"What part? Lothering or here?"

"Lothering mostly and Carver. The warrior that the Warden sent with you reminds me so much of him, it is scary. He even called Anders magey."

"Most people do that. Caver wasn't unique in that aspect. He just filled it with disdain and malice." Leigh giggled a bit remembering how Carver had acted when she brought the runaway apostate home with her. Even months later he was still complaining about it. "So did you get what you needed out of the Carta?"

"A days travel to the east following this trade route. I still want you and Cullen to go back."

"Not a chance in the Void Leigh. We are in this together."

"Alright all done. That group of dwarves won't be coming back to haunt you."

"I should go and burn their bodies so they don't taint anything else."

"That fire storm of yours set their gear aflame so I just threw them on top of it. As I said all taken care of. We need to rest so we can head out in the morning. I'll take first watch." The group set up camp and turned in for the night. As much as she tried to Leigh could not sleep. Slowly she eased herself out of Anders' arms and got off their bed roll. The warrior watched her from his perch on the stone wall that lined the road. Leigh went and sat near him, but her gaze was off to the rising moon. "You should get some sleep."

"Can't." Inside his helmet the warrior frowned, though Leigh could not see it.

"Get your magey to cast a sleep spell on you and you'll be fine."

"I would prefer you didn't call him that. He has a name, please us it."

"And that would be?"

"Anders."

"You mean like the people?" Leigh nodded and the warrior barked a laugh. "Do you even know his real name?"

"I don't need to thank you very much. I love him and he loves me." The warrior began to laugh harder and almost fell off the wall. "What's so damned funny?"

"I don't know, you would think a person would want to know who it is that shares their bed every night." Leigh glared at the man and stalked away quickly before she decided to set him on fire. "Wait. I'm sorry. I have a habit of speaking before I think. I...I have no right to say anything since I'm married to a mage as well."

"How did you pull that off? It is forbidden in any land under the Chantry for mages to wed."

"We had to go to Tervinter. There they don't care who you marry. It is not acknowledged in Ferelden, but since I have a high rank in the King's army Ori is protected."

"The King and Queen do seem to be more on the side of mages than most. It is refreshing to be honest." Leigh sat back down her ire quelled for the moment. Pash stirred in the back of her head. Waves a calming washed over her. Leigh knew she was getting dangerously close to her breaking point. With everything that had happened the last few months her emotions were all over the place. One slip could cost her dearly or anyone near her for that matter. Thinking about the past was not helping matters either. She still had a hole in her heart from losing her brother and as much as she has tried she never truly got over losing her first love. Thinking of her runaway apostate made her heart ache, though not as much as what she did to hurt Anders when she slept with Sebastian.

"Is your sister the only family you have here?"

"I have a cousin and an uncle here. My mother...she died a few years back. I...had a brother too, till the darkspawn took him from us."

"I'm...sorry, if I might ask how...how did you mother die? Was she sick?" Leigh took in a ragged breath and shook her head.

"She was murdered." The warrior's breath caught in his throat.

"The murderer, did you find them?"

"He died for his crimes by my hand."

"Good."

"Since you asked me, how about you Malcolm do you have any family?"

"I did once and I took them for granted, now...I would give anything just to have them back."

"I know how you feel. I would give almost anything to have my father, brother and mother back."

"The Maker has his plan as they say and we have to go along with it whether we want to or not."

"Yes so they say. I wish his plan did not involve taking almost my entire family from me. It makes it hard to want to follow his word."

"Life is never easy, you just have to do the best with what you have."

"My father use to say that all the time. Mostly when my brother and I screamed something was not fair."

"You want fair live under a rock or you take what ever life throws at you and let it roll off. It took me years to understand that."

"Then you are ahead of the game Malcolm. You know that was my father's name?"

"Really?"

"Yes."

"It is a more common Ferelden name. Kinda like Tomas or Maric." Leigh sighed and nodded. Her eye lids felt heavy and fatigue finally caught up with her. "You look beat, get some sleep. I have a feeling the next few days are going to be rough."

"Story of my life I'm sorry to say. It get's no easier."

"Then I am glad once this is done I am heading back to good old quiet Ferelden. All this excitement is too much for me."

"Good night Malcolm." The warrior nodded waiting til she was out of ear shot to whisper.

"Good night Leelee."

OoO

Dawn broke over the mountains, but the group had no desire to rush breaking camp. It was decided they would stay another night there just so that they would all be rested. Leigh and Varric went to hunt for food while the rest stayed at the camp. Anders paced the camp trying to figure out a way to tell Leigh it had been him all those years ago she had saved. That she had kept her promise to him even after all these years. Justice seethed at him for making it harder to cut ties with her. Over the past three years the spirit had grown quite fond of Leigh. Her complete acceptance of him gave Justice hope. Anders knew Pash factored into to it too since she was Justice's companion for lack of a better term.

"Anders what's wrong?" He stopped pacing and met Orianne's gaze evenly.

"Remember the girl I told you about? The one who saved my hide from the Templars on my fifth escape attempt."

"Yes, why are you thinking about her now?"

"I have been sharing her bed for the past three years and did not recognize her. Maker how did I not know?"

"Are you sure it is her?"

"Now more than ever. She...it seems I have changed enough she didn't recognize me either."

"I can see why. Your much thinner than you ever were back in the Tower and you sure as shit don't act like you did back then. Your not trying to hide your feelings behind sarcasm. The mischievous light in your eyes is gone. I don't know what happened to you to make you the man I see in front of me today, but you aren't the man I knew."

"People change Ori. Your not the same either, you know. After Ostagar you were so jumpy and that was even before what happened at the Tower. So you have no right to judge me." Anders did not see her hand fly to smack him across the face. For a small person Orianne packed quite a hit. "Nice Ori."

"I have no right to judge you, you sodding bastard. Do you know what happened to me at Ostagar? Do you know what Addler did to me or tried to do? You have no idea what it is like being both a mage and an elf. At least your human!" Orianne slumped down against the wall and covered her face. Anders gingerly sat next to her and wrapped his arm around her.

"Ori...I..."

"It's fine Anders. I remember what a selfish prig you could be." She lifted her hands from her face and stuck her tongue out at him.

"Real mature Ori."

"I hate seeing you like this. I still remember the mostly carefree boy I grew up with. The one who helped me play all those pranks on the Templars. The one who stayed up all night with me, Jowan, Mira Amell, and Finn talking about what we were going to do if we ever got out of there. Well not Finn he loved being at the Circle. I think the Templars left him alone because he would have nagged their ears off if they didn't. Maker, Anders I am one of the few people who know your real name."

"I was hoping you had forgotten that."

"Never. Aside from Jowan you were my best friend." Anders smiled before kissing Orianne on the temple.

"I have been meaning to ask you about your...how do I put this without you hurting me...brute of a husband?" Orianne sighed and playfully smacked his arm.

"We found him almost dead when we ran from Ostagar. Wynne and I healed him as much as we could before we moved him. The man we found next to him was dead already and his body looked like the Blight had taken him. My husband was lucky in that respect, but his injuries were horrific."

"What happened to him?"

"An ogre bashed him into the ground a few times, at least that is what he thought. That was the last thing he remembered before waking up at the Tower. It took me months to heal him fully and his left cheek still has a nasty scar on it that will never go away."

"How in the name of the Maker did you two fall for each other?"

"He was one of the ones who saved me from Addler. Him and his sister, Maker rest her soul. After the Hero of Ferelden saved the Tower I was sent to help train Conner, Arl Eamon's son til the Blight was over. Addler tried to...hurt me again and he stopped him. Beat the shit out of him and Rolen."

"Maker I would have loved to have seen that."

"Bad thing was after that they sent those two to the Wardens. I...heard the rumors. Did you kill Rolen?"

"Yes, but he tried to kill me first."

"Then the prig got what he deserved. He had it out for you for years. Ever since..."

"Ever since Leigh hung him and his five friends from a tree naked. Funny thing was he begged her not to kill him and promised to never hurt another mage again if she spared him. Guess he forgot that part."

"You have to tell her Anders."

"It is not that simple Ori."

"And why is that?"

"It just isn't." Before she could question him further Anders humped to his feet and stormed away. Orianne felt her husband's hand on her shoulder and she leaned back into his chest.

"You alright?"

"Fine love, just worried about my friend."

"Magey better watch himself is all I have to say."

"Love, he is hurting and deserves sympathy."

"Your such a bleeding heart Ori. I guess that's why your with my surly arse."

"I am with you because I love you and you treat me like a queen."

"You are a queen to me." She spun in his embrace resting her head on his chest. His hand came up and gently stroked her dark brown hair.

"Something is bothering you I can tell. What's wrong my love?"

"Just thinking about home and how much I miss it."

"Don't lie to me, what is going on?"

"I..." The warrior caught sight of Varric out of the corner of his eye watching them intently. He and Leigh had just returned from their hunting trip with a handful of rabbits. "Let's go for a little walk away from nosy dwarves. I have some good news and...some that I wish I had never heard."

OoO

"Has anyone got a working dagger? Those damn dwarves took mine." Leigh's mood had not improved since she had woke this morning. Her dreams were nightmarish at best. At least twice Anders had to wake her up when she started thrashing in her sleep. After the second time she decided to stay awake. The rest of her companions stayed on the other side of the camp away from her temper. Varric who normally did not let anything ruffle him was not eager to be near her. While they had been out hunting he made a comment to her and she had nearly bitten his head off.

"Love, let me do that." Leigh glared up at Anders and bared her teeth.

"I can do it just give me a blasted dagger!" He crouched down to her level taking her hands in his.

"Love, you need to rest."

"Pot how black thou areth."

"Funny, I know you were having nightmares, but you have to try Leigh. I can help if you'd like."

"Every time I close my eyes I see death after a while it starts to wear on you."

"Whose death?"

"Yours, my family's, take your pick. Sometimes I am watching it happen, others I'm the one causing it."

"They are only dreams Leigh. We all know you would never hurt us. You would rather rip out your own heart than hurt any of us."

"To quote you what if I can't control my powers? What if I lose myself to it all?"

"You won't. Leigh your so much stronger than I am. You weren't tainted by hate like I was. Your father raised you to treat people with respect and dignity. And you have Pash to keep you on the straight and narrow." The corners of Leigh's mouth pulled up a little.

"I know, but I have given into it and killed those Templars with my magic. It scared the hell out of me to see what I am capable of."

"They hurt your father and you were young. I have watched you over the past three years learn to use and control it. You have unshakable focus."

"Your bias as my teacher you know."

"And as your lover."

"You know you are more than that to me."

"I do Mo Anam Cara."

"What!" Her heart skipped a beat hearing those words again after all these years. Her first love had called her that right before he turned himself in to the Templars to keep her safe. He never got a chance to tell her what it meant.

"Mo Anam Cara means my soul mate. That's what you are to me Leigh."

"What language is that?" Her voice sounded strained, but she forced her face to remain placid.

"It is from my home land,the Anderfels. I don't remember as much of it as I would like, but I do remember some of it. I'm surprised you never asked why I was call Anders."

"Because you are from the Anderfels. I knew that. Your looks kinda gave it away. Though I thought most men from the Anderfels were thick and burly."

"I use to be, but through my Warden training and my less than luxurious life as a possessed apostate has thinned me down quite a bit."

"You would think with my cooking you would put on some more weight."

"First I would have to be home enough to eat it. Leigh I wish everything was different. That I could be the man that could give you the world on a silver platter, but I can't..." Her hands rest on both sides of his face making him look her in the eyes.

"If you say I deserve better I swear I will stonefist you back to Kirkwall."

"Varric was right you can be scarier than Aveline." Leigh blinked a few times and began giggling. The giggles soon turned into a full blow laughing fit. She laughed until her sides hurt and she couldn't breathe. "There is woman I know and love. I knew she was in there somewhere."

"I can't help it you bring the best out in me."

"I think that is the other way around love. You are the better half in this relationship, always have been." Leigh opened her mouth to rebut his comment, but yawned instead. Her eyes felt heavy and it took her a second to realize he had laid her down on the bed rolls. "Now try to get some sleep."

"But the sun is still up in the sky." He sighed at her and threw her cloak over her head.

"There that should block out the light." Her fingers twisted into his coat and anchored him next to her.

"Stay."

"I wasn't going anywhere. Now sleep, I fear we have a long fight awaiting us tomorrow."

"As long...as I...have you, we...will win." Anders smiled as she fell asleep curled up against him. Varric walked toward them to say that the food was almost ready, but Anders put his finger to his lips and the dwarf stopped.

"Just save some for us later. She needs this." He whispered loud enough for Varric to hear him, but not enough to wake Leigh.

"Yes she does Blondie. I'll have Sunshine freeze a few for you both til your ready to eat. You should try to get some rest too while your stuck there."

"I'm not stuck Varric. I'm right where I want to be." The dwarf snickered and walked away. "None of them would understand would they Dove? They have no idea what we have been through together. That witch was right about some things at least. She was wrong about me though. I will never let them hurt you. I would die first." Anders let the heavy feeling of sleep seep into his muscles. Leigh shifted a bit in his arms allowing him to rest his chin on the top of her head. Before sleep claimed him he could have sworn he heard her murmur his real name. His thoughts drifted back to his fifth escape from the Tower and his adventures as he tried to stay ahead of the Templars. Little did he know Leigh was dreaming the same dream.

**I am going back in time for a little bit so please don't adjust your screens. The next few chapters I had actually written to go as a separate story I had written after I started this one. I always pictured Anders and Leigh meeting each other on one of his escape attempts. I want to add them in now so people aren't going huh when I refer back to something that happened in the past. Mo Anam Cara is Celtic for my soul mate. I have mostly a Celtic background so it fit for me. Again thank you all for sticking with me. I am really enjoying writing this. It helps to know others are enjoying reading it. **

**Raven**


	23. Chapter 23

For the most part Lothering was a quiet little farm town. Nothing much ever happened here and that was the way the Hawkes liked it. Malcolm Hawke had moved his family here when his oldest Leigh turned five years of age and his twins were only three. They had been there for eleven years and the Templars had only ever came close to the family once. The quick wit of Leigh had saved their lives. Malcolm was in their barn training his youngest Bethany to control her magic while his other two children were tending to the crops that were ready to be harvested.

"Carver slow down you are going to make Ol' Bets have a heart attack." Leigh Hawke had her hands on the harness of the old mare to slow her down. Her younger brother scowled at her from atop the wagon.

"I want to be done with this. I have better things to do than muck around here."

"Is that better thing to do Peaches?" Carver jumped from wagon and swung at his sister. "I think I hit a sore spot. Come one little brother you know full well you can't catch me." He growled at her and charged. Leigh was there one second and gone the next. Carver hit dead air and wheeled around looking for her.

"Come out here and fight me like a man dammit."

"I am not a man and if Papa heard you swear like that he would tan your arse." Carver could not get a bead on where her voice was coming from and it irked him to no end. The field they were in was very open and the tree line stood over a quarter mile away. He could not fathom where in the name of the Maker his sister was hiding.

"Now whose swearing, just because you are sixteen doesn't make you an adult Leigh. Now get back out here and help me finish bringing in the squash before it gets dark."

"Sure thing." Carver jumped when Leigh's voice sounded loud and clear from right behind him.

"Shit don't do that you will give me a heart attack before I am twenty."

"Ah little brother I plan on having you around for many years to come even if it is just to annoy you." Carver rolled his eyes and went back to the wagon. From his elevated position he could see the tree line clearly. Something caught his eye scrambling from the tree line followed by at least six Templars.

"Leigh get up here." His sister hopped up in one fluid motion and followed his pointed finger. "What the hell are they chasing?" Leigh could see the person that was being chased clearer than her brother and she cursed loudly.

"They are chasing a mage. Get back to the house, warn Papa and Beth. Stay there and make sure they are safe. I am going to make sure they don't get anywhere near here if I can help it."

"How are you going to stop at least six heavily armored and armed Templars?"

"With stealth and a lot of luck, now get out of here." Leigh always carried her dagger with her, it had become a habit she adopted since the last time the Templars stormed through Lothering. She would not let anyone take her family from her without a fight. She ran as fast as her legs would take her in the direction that she saw the armored men go. She wished she had had time to put on her leather jerkin, she felt naked. "Maker how can they run this fast in that heavy armor?" The sounds of yelling made her screech to a halt. What she found stoked the fire of rage in her.

The mage they had been chasing was on the ground bleeding from his mouth like he had been backhanded by one of the Templar's heavy gauntlets. His robes were torn and dirty. It looked to her that he had been on the run for a while. She watched the one Templar grab the mage by the back of the neck while he brought his dagger against the poor man's neck.

"Not so cheeky now are you?" The mage just laughed then spit blood in the knight's face. That action brought another metal hand across his face this time it left a nasty gash. The mage stared at the Templars defiantly and laughed.

"Alright my fine gentlemen you have had your fun, but I really think it is time to take me back to the Tower, don't you?"

"I think we should just end it here and now." The Templar that held him said.

"We can't, they want him back alive, but whose to say we can't have a little fun with him first." Another one put his hand hand on his friends shoulder and laughed. "Yes I do think this will be fun. I say we strip him down and take turns. What say you?"

"I knew that all of you just wanted to see me naked. I have been told I was very well endowed by the ladies in the Tower, but I am sorry to say I am not into gents."

"Who said we were giving you the choice pretty boy." The mages brown eyes went wide and he struggled to get away. Another blow came and sent him reeling to the ground. Leigh could not stand by and let these men brutalize the mage. She took her amulet off that she always wore and hid it in a knot hole in the tree she was hiding behind. "_Sorry Pash I need to be able to cast if I am to stop this. I will not let this man suffer under them. I think the need a dose of their own medicine." "Leigh you can't, you are not ready!" "I have to be or they will hurt him and I won't allow that." "Leigh please..."_ Once the amulet was off Leigh felt her mana return. It felt like she was high as it coursed through her veins. She heard the mage scream as they started to rip his robes off. It pushed her into action.

"We will make you pay for insulting us."

"I think not Templar. Now back away from him or I will be forced to do something unpleasant to you." The six men turned around to find a young woman with glowing red eyes. Her features were obscured by shadow from the canopy above them. One of the Templars ran at her and in a flash she disappeared leaving him to swing his sword into a tree.

"By the Void what is that?" One of them looked around frantic to find the woman. He visibly shook with fear til the leader barked orders.

"Cleanse the area of magic and use disrupt, looks like we will really have a good time tonight." Evil laughter rang around them like it was coming from everywhere. The mage even looked around with wide eyes.

"If you think you are getting you dirty hands on me Templar you are sorely mistaken. I am not someone to trifle with."

"She is the Witch of the Wilds."

"That is just a tale told to little children to scare them straight. She is just a blood mage."

"I don't need blood magic to stop you fool." Tendrils of magic took each of the Templars hold. They struggled, but could not break it's hold. The woman appeared next to the accosted mage and helped him to his feet. "I am quite powerful enough without resorting to that evil practice." She held her hand out in front of her and brought them to their knees. Leigh turned slightly and smiled at the mage. "Are you alright?"

"Ye...yes, please don't turn me into a toad." She couldn't help herself and she giggled at the absurd notion.

"I can't turn people into toads, but I can do this." She rocked her hand back and forth making the men bow lower to the ground. "Now my fine knights I want you to strip to your skin." They all looked up at her in horror.

"We will not bend to your will bitch." Leigh clucked her tongue and shook her head. The tendrils bore into their chests making the mage turn his head away. His skin turned a little green and Leigh heard a wet sound hitting the ground. He had thrown up and a pang of sympathy ran through her.

"It is not hurting them. I don't want them dead, but they do need to feel as we do. Helpless, scared, maybe they will think twice before abusing another mage again."

"But...it's blood magic."

"Have you seen me cut my arm to use my blood to fuel this. Look at my arms do you see the telltale signs of me ever using blood magic." The man looked over her body and found no sign of scars that would be there if indeed she was a blood mage.

"Then my lady I apologies for my assumptions. What are you going to do to them?"

"Make sure they never forget this day as long as they live." The tendrils pulled the men to their feet, each able to move their heads, but nothing else. "You can protest all you want, but your bodies are under my control, not fun is it, being helpless? Not given the choice of what you can do, where you can go. This is what mages feel like everyday under your heels. Now strip to nothing." Armor started to fall to the ground piece by piece. Til they they stood in front of the two mages stark naked. Leigh did not look them over and tried to keep from blushing as she did this. The last man she had ever seen naked was her brother and he couldn't be called a man at the time, he was only three. She heard the mage snicker behind her before he covered his mouth to stifle a louder laugh. Leigh whispered in his ear. "Enjoying this are we?"

"It is about time they get a taste of what they do to us, but now what?" A wide evil grin graced her lips and she turned back to the very bare men. Her voice was edgy to the point of being frightening.

"I think we should hang them from the trees and let them think about the way they act toward their fellow man." The six men's eyes went wide, all they heard was hang them from the trees. One began to sob like a small child and began to beg.

"Please I don't want to die. I just received my knighthood, I swear I will never treat a mage badly just let me live."

"I have no intentions of killing any of you. You will hang from the trees, but not by your necks. I am nothing if not merciful, unlike all of you." The ivy vines that adorned the trees seemed to move with a mind of their own as they snaked around the Templars. Some of the men screamed as they were lifted up in the air. "Now you will stay there for a while and think of what you have done. If I were you I would not struggle too much it attracts predators and we don't want that do we? Have a good night boys and don't worry about your armor, you will find it on the other side of the forest about ten miles from here." The armor floated away toward the edge of the forest as she had stated. The mage stared open mouthed having never seen a spell like this before. Leigh motioned for the mage to walk ahead of her as she lead him the round about way to get him back to the village.

"So where did you escape from?" She gave him a questioning look. "What Circle did you belong to?

"Oh, I have never been in the Circle." Leigh's hand went up to her neck so her fingers could twist her amulet, only to find her amulet not there. " Shit, stay here I have to go get something I swear I will be right back, just don't move." Before he could protest she vanished leaving him in the darkening woods.

"Great, why did she have to leave me in the middle of nowhere with no magic to defend myself. Maker I hate the wilderness."

"You do know the louder you whine the more attention you draw to yourself from the wolves that live in these woods right?" He jumped not ready for her voice to be so close to him. He wheeled around almost hitting her with his staff. She dodged it and twisted it out of his hands. "Whoa, calm down. I am not going to hurt you, not after I went to all the trouble of saving your arse."

"Sorry, just jumpy. I have spent the better part of my life stuck in the Tower. I have lost my nature sense."

"Not a good thing to lose around here. Don't worry I will make sure you get through here safely." His shoulders loosened under her touch. He had not really noticed how cute she was. Her black hair framed her heart shaped face and stopped just shy of her chin. The things that got him the most were her eyes, haunting gray eyes. They were so pale that they almost looked white. Her skin was cream colored and his mind went to a naughty place.

"So you live around here alone?"

"No I live here with my family."

"Ah, can I say your man is very lucky, you are a ravishing woman, my lady." She looked at him in mock horror then began to laugh.

"Maker, I am not married. I live here with my parents and my siblings. How old do you think I am?"

"Old enough to be married it would seem. I am sorry for assuming, it is just that someone as lovely as you would be beating men off with a stick."

"I prefer to beat them off with these." Leigh brandished her daggers and the mage gave a audible gulp.

"You sure your not a blood mage?" She glared at him and he held up his hands in apology. "Please don't turn me inside out."

"No wonder they wanted to hurt you, you can be right annoying."

"All part of my charm my dear. How long will you keep those men up in the tree?"

"Long enough for me to get you out of town and safe. A day maybe a little more. I have a spell up that let's me know how they are doing. If any of them is in trouble I will go and help. First though I better take you to my Papa so he can get you healed up and a good meal in you."

"Your father is a mage?"

'Yes, from Kirkwall. He and my mother came here to get away from the Templars." The farm house came into his view and a dull ache in his heart threatened to double him over. It looked like his home before the Templars came for him. It was a simple stone structure with a thatched roof. Dried herbs hung from the wooden over hang leaving a enchanting scent through the air. A large barn stood right next to the house with a fenced in field. A high pitched whinny could be heard and a lot of cursing over it. "Shit, she is at it again." Leigh broke into a run right for the paddock. A black well muscled filly reared and bucked trying to dislodge the rider on her back. "Carver you idiot get off of her!" The mage could only watch her run at try to grab the reins to settle the beast. A large firm hand slapped itself on his shoulder and turned him around.

"You must be the lad my boy saw running from the Templars." Malcolm Hawke was a burly man, and for those who did not know him,quite intimidating. He was over six feet tall, with black hair and the same haunting gray eyes his daughter has.

"Ye...yes ser." Malcolm looked him up and down seeing the damage the Templars had done to him, but then his eyes went to the paddock and his two children. He rushed past the speechless mage and jumped the fence.

"Carver get off that damned creature." The young boy dropped off the still bucking horse while his sister still hung on to the reins for dear life. "Let go Leigh!" The girl gave a grunt as she tried to swing her arms around the filly's neck. Once she got a hand full of mane she swung her small fame into the saddle. Her hands still had the reins and she pulled up with all her might to control the head of the animal.

"Whoa girl, easy...easy now." Her voice came out softly and the horse started settling under her control. With one last rear up to dislodge her rider the filly gave up and pawed at the ground.

"Void take that horse. She is crazy, I was working her out and everything was fine, then all of a sudden she just snapped. Papa she is not going to work out if we can't ride her." Malcolm put his hand out to help is son off the ground. Carver dusted himself off and stared balefully at the horse. He watched his sister swing herself off the filly and lead her back to the barn. Malcolm pushed him gently toward the house so he could see if there was any injuries. "Who in the name of the Maker is that?" He had noticed the mage still standing there in awe of what he had seen his sister do. Carver saw the mage's eyes never left his sister til she was out of his sight and a wave of rage coursed through him. He ran at him pushing him over so he could stand over him menacingly "Stop staring at my sister you prig!"

"Carver enough. The boy has been through enough today. Help him up and go inside. Your sister and I will be along shortly." The tenor of his father's voice told him to behave himself. His hand shot out and pulled the mage to his feet. Malcolm made sure both were in the house before going to see him daughter. He found her taking the tack of the flighty filly and whispering softly to it.

"What happened after you sent Carver back home?" Leigh stared at the ground and kicked the sawdust that lined the stall. "Leigh I want the truth. Did you use your magic?"

"I...I had to Papa they were going to...they were going to hurt him." Her father's face softened and he hugged her to him. "Why do they hate us?"

"They fear what they don't understand or what they are jealous of. You took a great risk today, not only for yourself, but for all of us. Those Templars most likely have his phylactery or part of it. They will be headed here next." Leigh opened her belt pouch and handed her father a small vile. He looked up at her and smiled. "Ever my little sneak I see. It looks like they only took a little of the full sample, so he is not safe here for long. In the morning he will have to leave, but for tonight he can stay, heal and get a hot meal in his belly."

"Thank you Papa." She wrapped her arms around his neck and gave him a quick peck on the cheek before run to the house. She found her brother staring at the mage with a look of disdain as they sat at the dinner table. Bethany was helping her mother set the table and bring out the food. Leigh put her hand on the mage's shoulder and squeezed it. He looked up at her with a weak smile, but his body stayed tense.

"I shouldn't stay here. I am putting you all in danger if they find me." A large hand clapped the vile in front of the mage and he gaped at it. "How did you get that?" Leigh just shrugged her shoulders and smiled

"She is a little thief that's how she got it."

"Well my dear baby brother we all can't wield a sword the size of a ogre, so I stick with what works and sneaky works for me." Carver rolled his eyes and stared dishing out food to his plate. Leigh took the mage's plate and started to pile food on it for him. The smell of it made his mouth water. "Here and don't be shy for seconds there is plenty." He looked around the room and saw a warm friendly family, well save Carver, but the rest smiled politely at him. Nodding to urge him to eat. Malcolm gave a small prayer over the meal before the began the feasting.

"You from the Tower here lad?"

"Yes, ser. I am not from Ferelden originally though. My family hailed from up north."

"Ah, you are an Anders then? I can see it in your features." Leigh looked at the mage wondering what her father was talking about. The mage had blonde hair pulled into a ponytail. His face was well rounded, almost like he had not quite lost the baby fat from his childhood. His warm brown eyes had a hint of amber in the making them look even warmer. His arms were thick as was the rest of him, but he was not fat just had a small layer of extra padding over his muscles. "What school do you study?"

"Creation and healing. I can use fire and ice, but not as strongly."

Papa is a healer too." Bethany's small voice sounded from next to her father. She looked shyly at the mage then went back to her dinner.

"It's true, there is no finer skill to have. I see it as a blessing not a curse."

"I wish the Templars saw it that way. Maybe they wouldn't manhandle me as roughly."

"Well lad you can stay the night, but in the morning we will get you back on the road. I will not deny help to a fellow mage, but I must protect my family."

"I understand ser, I thank you for your kindness thus far."

'Your welcome lad. You will have to stay the night in the barn since the house is a bit cramped, but it is a warm night. Once your done eating I will help you make a bed to sleep in and heal those cuts on your face. Leigh will pack you a bag to travel with full of food and potions. We also have to give you some clothes. Your robes are in tatters."

"Wearing archon robes just screams I am a mage come and get me to the Templars." He shot the oldest girl a withering look which only made her laugh harder. Her father clearing his throat made her quiet.

"She is right lad. I think we have some clothes around here that would fit you so you blend in better. Carver give him some of your old shirts you have grown out of and trousers too. I have pair of boots that are too small for me that should do the trick." When the dinner was finished Leandra and Bethany cleared the table while Carver went to fetch his old clothes. Malcolm and Leigh went to work packing him a travel pack full of survival necessities. Then Malcolm set out to heal the damage the Templars had done. "Your lucky lad, I have seen them hit people and tear off full cheeks with those bloody gauntlets."

"It helps if you roll with the hit. It stops most of the major damage."

"Sounds like they like hitting you lad. I am taking this is not your first escape attempt?"

"No, this is number five. It is also the furthest I have ever gotten. Normally they catch me with in a day of two, this time has been at least two weeks. I have a good feeling about this time." Malcolm chuckled and ran his hands above the skin on the mage's face. The cuts and bruises started to disappear and he gave a sigh of relief. "Maker that feels so much better. Thank you."

"I will show you to the barn and help you settle in." The two men went out to the barn and Malcolm showed him where he could settle in for the night. He was thankful to have a roof over his head for the night since it started to rain not long before they left the house. "It is not much, but it is dry. I will warn you to stay away from Shade. She is a right mean filly. My eldest is the only one she seems to respect. Ol' Bets won't bother you she is too lazy and Mouse should leave you alone too."

"Mouse?"

"The cat, she doesn't show herself much. Skittish little thing, but a great mouser. Night lad, try to get as much sleep as you can."

"I will again thank you ser. It means a lot to me." With a nod Malcolm was gone leaving the mage alone. "I wish my family had been like this, maybe those prigs would have never got their hands on me." He knew he was speaking to himself, but it made him feel better. Life of a Circle mage was a lonely one, sure there were many other people around them, but you could never get close to anyone. It was too easy for the Templars to use it against you. He settled himself into the makeshift bed and let his eyes close. Sleep took him shortly after.

OoO

He wasn't sure how long he was asleep, but her felt someone staring at him and he flew out of the hay with a start. The dark figure held it's hands up to signal they were not a threat. His eyes narrowed when he could not call his mana up. The effects of the Templars powers were still with him.

"Take it easy it's just me. I wanted to check to see if you were alright out here." The sound of his savior's voice made him ease. She stepped out into the dim lantern light and he sank back down to his bed. She was wearing a old pair of trousers cut off at the knee and a loose fitting linen shirt. The clothes had seen better days, but to him she looked sexy and impish. A wave of desire ran through him.

"You scared me, sorry runaway mages normally are on edge all the time."

"I understand why. What they were about to do to you was horrible enough to think of let alone have it happen. Why are they aloud to do that to people?" He smiled at her naivety having not been raised in the Circle.

"It keeps us in line, makes us think we are nothing more than weapons for them to use. We are slaves made to jump at their every whim. Be grateful you have a family that cares enough for you not to give you to the Circle. I envy what you have here."

"I'm sorry. It sounds so hollow, but I am. No one deserves to be caged just because the Maker gave them the blessing of magic. I wish there was a way to change it."

"Many have tried, all have failed little Dove. I hope I never see them cage you, it would be a sin." A blush crept up her neck and he brushed a lock of her hair out of her eyes tucking it behind her ear. In the Circle he was quite the ladies man. His charms could get even the most fridge of women to grace his bed or closet, or even a secluded corner if the need called for it. With the girl in front of him it would not be a challenge, she was warm and alive. He felt a twinge of jealousy rolled in him. She had not been spoiled by being caged. She had a life he wanted, but was never sure he could have.

"Do you hear that?" Her voice dropped to a whisper. A low moan sounded from the other side of the barn. She dropped to crawling position and crept up to see what was making the sound. The mage followed close behind her. The sight that met Leigh's eyes made her turn back around and bury her head in her hands.

"What is it?" He peered over her shoulder and saw her brother well engaged with a young lady. "Good maybe he will be in a better mood in the morning." He felt her smack the back of his head and he stifled a yelp. 'What did you do that for?"

"My brother is only a kid, he shouldn't be doing that. Let alone with Peaches of all people. She has had ever guy in town." Leigh's voice came out a angry hiss.

"I was younger than him when I had my first...anyway it is nothing to be ashamed of. Have you ever tried it?" The look of utter shock almost made him laugh out loud. She glared at him and began to crawl away from the sight of her brother's tryst. He took one last look and shook his head. "She is right Peaches is very experienced. Lucky boy." He turned and followed after her, he found her out of the barn and under a huge willow tree. The rain was still falling, but only as a fine mist. "Are you alright?"

"Just fine." Her arms were crossed tightly over her chest and she did not look up at him.

"You are a horrible liar. So your brother got lucky, what does it matter?"

"It matters because I am the oldest and every guy I have ever met has been scared shitless of me. None of them give me the time of day."

"Well their morons. You are quite cute, if I do say so myself and if those guys are scared of you it is only because you can kick their asses. Most men hate that, I personally like a girl would can take care of herself. I think it is sexy." The blush returned and she had a small smirk on her face. She had not noticed how close he was standing til she turned her head up to look him in the eye. His lips brushed against hers softly and she froze. "I will take it you have never even been kissed before either am I right?"

"Not really." Her voice was barely a whisper. He leaned in again this time his fingers laced into her hair and with his other hand he pulled her flush against his body. This time she relaxed and kissed him back. Her arms wrapped around his neck and he took it as a sign to deepen the kiss. His tongue teased her lower lip to gain entrance which she granted him gladly. He was overwhelmed by the taste of her, it was a sweet taste mixed with a hint of spice. He let out a low groan and pulled her up so her legs could wrap around his waist. She let out a squeak in surprise, but did not push him away. Lust washed away any guilty feeling he might have had for trading her kindness for this. He was a selfish man and to him she was there and willing. She broke their kiss first to catch her breath. Her eyes were wide and her body trembled. "I am just another conquest for you aren't I?"

"What? No,..I...Maker's breath. Do you think I am that self centered?" He was, but that was besides the point. He did not want to break this girl who risked everything just to save his sorry hide. He owed her much more than just a simple taking of her innocence, but he did not know how to be any other way. He did not know how to show his gratitude without giving his body to whomever he was grateful to.

"I...no, I just don't want you to feel you have to do this to thank me." He searched her eyes and found nothing but sincerity, kindness. Inside he wrestled with his desire to take her and his honorable side that said to stop. He closed his eyes and rested his forehead against hers, his honorable side had finally won out over his libido.

"Forgive me my lady. I am nothing but a cad and a snake. I repay your kindness, but trying to take advantage of you. You should go back to your room before we do something you will regret. Your first time should be with someone you love not some random mage you happened to bump into in the woods." She untangled herself from him and leaned into his chest. This took him by surprise, most women would have smacked him by now or at least told him to jump off a cliff.

"I am a mage who else would understand better what I am other than a mage." She made a good point, he was a mage and most people could never understand what they go through. The constant hounding by the Templars, the endless whispers from demons in the Fade. Why let some stupid farm boy find out what she is and spoil her? Why not let her be with a person who is just like her? He opened his mouth to speak, but she pulled him to the other side of the tree to hide. Her brother had finished his fun and was heading back to the house. He could see the silhouette of the girl sneaking back to where ever it was she had come from. Once Carver was back in the house she led him back to the barn. "You would think he would have done that somewhere else 0\knowing full well my Papa put you in here. I swear he can be really insensitive sometimes."

"I am use to it."

"Still, it's rude. I should let you get some sleep you are going to have to get up early to make it past town before midday."

"You could stay and keep me company if you would like."

"If Papa finds me out here he will skin us both. I would rather not let that happen since I have saved you skin once already today. Good Night."

"Night little Dove." He noticed she did not make a sound as she left, it was mystifying to him. If he had not seen her use magic with his own eyes, he would have sworn she was a rogue. With a huff he flopped back down on his straw bed and fell into a fitful sleep. He wasn't sure how long he had been asleep before someone shook him awake violently.

"You have to wake up now! Templars are coming!" He opened his eyes and saw the sour faced brother standing over him. The sounds of people scrambling around could be heard in the barn. Malcolm was taking the old mare and saddling her while the younger sister checked over their packs.

"Lad, get on your feet and gather your things. They will be here any minute." The older mage hopped up on the old mare and pulled his daughter up behind him. "Leigh is Shade tacked?"

"Yes Papa, I have my pack and his already. Get out of here, we will be fine."

"Maker watch over us. Carver you know what to do. Keep your mother safe."

"Yes Papa." With that Malcolm nudged the mare's side and took off. Leigh grabbed the mage by his shirt and pulled him toward the demonic filly. He baulked when she pushed him toward the beast.

"You can't be serious. She nearly killed your brother."

"I am serious and the Templars will kill you if you don't get your arse in that saddle. Now move." He had never rode a horse before, he didn't even know where to begin to even mount up. "Carver give him a hand up."

"Come on magey, up you go." For being a young teen, Carver was surprisingly strong it took him little effort to throw the bewildered mage on the back of the horse. Leigh deftly slide in front of him and took the reins. "Be careful sister."

"I will Carver. I will return as soon as I get him far enough away and safe. Take care of everyone for me." She squeezed her brother's hand then kicked the filly to get her moving. "Hold on to me or you will fly right off." Her warning came a second before the horse took off like it was chased by the archdemon himself. The mage had a death grip on her waist as they crashed through the forest and into the pitch black of night. Fear gripped him not from the break neck speed on which they were going, but the fact this girl was willing to put herself in danger for him. All he could do was hold on and pray as the rain started falling again. His life was now in her hands.


	24. Chapter 24

Carver had gotten word to his father that it was safe to come home. Malcolm Hawke and his youngest child had returned home after the Templars had moved on. They had found nothing of the mage they were looking for and had no choice but to return to Kinloch Hold to retrieve more of his blood to track him.

"I am surprised they gave up so easily. Last time they were here for weeks before moving on." Malcolm mused as he got off of Ol' Bets.

"They said without his phylactery there was no way to find him. At least that is what I overheard in the tavern."

"Is your sister back yet?" Carver stared at the ground, not wanting to meet his father's eyes. "Carver, where is Leigh?"

"I'm not sure. She took off right after you two did, but she headed towards the Wilds, not the trade route."

"Maker's breath what was she thinking? The Wilds?"

"I know Papa. You know Leigh she probably thought the legends would keep the Templars at bay."

"There are far more dangerous things in the Wilds than just the old legends Carver."

"Well at least she won't have to worry about someone trying to rob her." Malcolm arched his eyebrow in question at his son. "She left that necklace of hers here." Carver had never seen the color drain from anyone's face as fast as it did on his father's. "Papa what's wrong?"

"Your sister is in more danger than you realize Carver."

"Why? Leigh is an accomplished fighter and sneaky, the Templars don't stand a chance. Or anyone for that matter."

"There are things about your sister you don't know son. Things that had to be done to keep us all safe."

"Papa your making no sense. What things?" Malcolm put his large hand on his son's shoulder and motioned for him to walk. They walked til they were out in the main field far from the house.

"Bethany and I aren't the only mages in the family Carver."

"Yeah I know, mom said we have cousins on her side that are too, so?"

"Leigh is also a mage." Carver began to laugh thinking his father was joking. When he noticed the look on Malcolm's face he knew his father was dead serious.

"She can't be I have never seen her do magic or act all magey. She can't be a mage."

"Sit down Carver and I will explain, but you can not tell your mother or Bethany."

"Why?"

"You'll see when I tell you all of it. Now sit and listen." Carver sat next to his father and listened to him explain what his sister really was. The boy's eyes went wider and wider the more his father spoke. When his father was done all Carver could do was shake his head and stare off in the direction of the Wilds. His thoughts were now on his sister and her safety.

OoO

Dawn broke on the third day of them running. Leigh was exhausted, as was the filly Shade. They had found a ruin in the Wilds that gave a good vantage point all around them. Leigh let Shade wander so she could graze while the mage tried to walk off his sore legs. Leigh could hear him grumbling and moaning from her perch up in the ruin. When she looked down she saw he had taken his shirt off and his boots. A blush flare up on her face and she turned away keeping her eyes open for trouble. Part of her wished she had brought her amulet, not hearing Pash in her head was lonely and not having her counsel was terrifying.

"Hey do you see anything from up there?"

"No, but I will warn you with all the noise your making the wolves around here will come and get you down there." She knew it was a evil thing to do, but she could not help herself. Seeing him scramble up the ruins to her perch made her laugh. Til he was up there and she saw he was still bare chested and shoeless.

"Maker I hate nature. How are you not scared out of your wits?"

"I grew up on the edge of town. Wolves, bandits, bears, and other nasty things are a way of life. You learn to deal with them."

"How?"

"You just do." She pressed herself against the stone wall as far as she could so she did not touch him. It did not go unnoticed by the mage. He smiled and shifted himself closer to her. She had no more room to move since the perch was barely big enough for the two of them to begin with. "Do you have to sit so close?"

"Why am I making you nervous Dove?"

"No, it is just hot out here and your all sweaty."

"Hmm, most women I know would find that attractive."

"Well they need their heads examined." He snickered at her and leaned in closer. "What are you doing?"

"Isn't it obvious Dove..." His lips touched hers softly at first, she could feel his hands tug at her vest and she smacked them away before putting her foot against his chest.

"Stop!"

"I...why?"

"I have no idea who you are, I don't even know your name and I have been traveling with you for days now." This was a change from the first night he had met her. That night she had all but given in to him, but his conscience got the better of him. Now they were out in the wilderness alone and she was driving him mad again.

"I'm a mage, your a mage what's there to know. Your attracted to me, I'm attracted to you so why not act on it?"

"That's besides the point, what if I wanted more than just a tumble?"

"Ah Dove first rule of being a mage is never, ever fall in love or get attached in any way. It is just a momentary comfort nothing to do with the heart other than to get it racing." He leaned in again, but Leigh jumped up and dropped down from the perch. She needed to clear her head and cool herself down. "Hey you can't leave me here alone. Where are you going?"

"I need to get some water. Stay up there you'll be safe. I'll be back in a bit."

"Great, now what did I do? He sat down with a huff and stared out over the Wilds. He could not understand her. She gave him all the signs that she wanted him or at least he thought she did. The mage sighed and closed his eyes. The sunshine felt good on his skin. He laid back and let the warmth lull him into a light sleep.

Leigh made her way to a nearby stream and started to take off her heavy leathers. She hung her dagger belt in the tree near the stream and piled her clothes under it. She eased herself into the cool water, letting herself slip under the surface. The silt that had settled at the bottom was churned up by her movements making it hard to see. She came up for air to find herself surrounded.

"Well I have to say this is one of the strangest fish I have ever seen." All the men who were staring at her were wearing mismatched armor. Bandits she surmised by there leers and rough looks.

"Maybe it's a mermaid?" Leigh did not like were this was heading. She cursed herself for leaving her daggers on the shore. She counted the men, four against one not bad odds, but she would prefer not to have to fight them at all. "_Well I was able to scare the Templars into thinking I was the Witch of the Wilds maybe it will work again."_ Leigh took a deep breath and called forth her mana, but one of the men got the drop on her. His large hand covered her mouth so she could not scream and picked her up out of the water.

"Whatever she is I think we could use a little fun, right boys?" Leigh struggled against her captures, but the brute holding her was far stronger and her hands where held tight against her body so she couldn't cast. She tried to scream only to find her sounds muffled by the man's fat hand. "Feisty isn't she? I likes em feisty." The man pulled a dagger and placed it on her cheek. "Now either you cooperate or I will maim that pretty little face of yours. Now be a good girl and let us have our way. You might even like it." Her struggles grew weaker and hot tears streamed down her cheeks. The man holding her eased his grip on her mouth a little and it was enough for her to bite down on the flesh between his thumb and his pointer finger. His scream rang out through the ruin. She felt his other hand go up and try to pry her off and she head butted him. Leigh felt a flash of hot liquid slash on her bare shoulders. She had crushed his nose and he stumbled back still screaming.

"Getter off!" More hands grappled with her, but had a hard time holding on with all the blood that covered her now. The man with the knife pushed the others away.

"That's it you little bitch I think you are more trouble than your worth. Let em go now or I will gut you." She glared back at the man and bit down harder. His friend whimpered and crashed to his knees dragging her with him. She saw the glint of the knife coming at her and she closed her eyes, not wanting to see her death coming. The smell of ozone shot through the air and the hair on the back of her neck stood up.

"Step away from her now!" The mage's voice was a welcome sound to her. She opened her eyes and saw his hands were crackling with lightning. "You alright Dove?" She released her bite on the man and spit out the blood that had flown into her mouth.

"Just peachy. What took you so long?"

"You told me to stay where I was, I listened."

"Well from now on don't listen to me."

"Well gents I would say this is a draw. I say we go our way and you go yours. Let's just forget this ever happened I would hate to have to hurt you." The leader sneered at the mage and moved faster than anyone thought possible. He pulled Leigh up by her hair and held his knife to her throat.

"She needs to pay for maiming my friend, and I bet the Templars would love to get their hands on you boy."

"You really don't want to do that. I am giving you one last warning let her go or you will be sorry." The man laughed and slide the knife over her throat. The mage screamed and let loose on the men. The bank of the stream was soon littered with burnt bodies, one of the men happened to get away, but did not make it far. Shade had heard the commotion and made her way over to it. The man ran at her with his sword drawn, not to attack the horse, but to defend himself from the enraged mage. The filly reared over the man knocking the sword from his hands and preceded to stomp the man to death. The filly turned her golden eyes to where the mage was kneeling in front of the still form of her owner. She whinnied softly and headed over to them.

The mage held his hand over the wound on Leigh's neck. The cut was not as deep as it looked when it happened. The bandit did nick the jugular vein, but it wasn't gushing blood. He was glad his mana had recovered from the drain the Templars had hit him with days earlier. The warm glow from his hands sank into her skin healing it from the inside out. He shook his head and let out a nervous laugh.

"You're a damn lucky girl." Once he was satisfied she was all healed he lifter her up and carried her back to the ruin. He noticed the horse was following him and it made him a little bit uneasy. The eyes on the filly looked too intelligent for his liking. Not like the doe eyed horses the Templars had. "I'm trying to help her so don't get any ideas. I saw what you did to that bandit. Nice work though." The filly snorted and threw her head up and down. "I'm glad you are happy with yourself." He was glad her bed roll was still set out from the night before. He laid her down and went to gather her clothes. A raw shot of fear ran through him when she found the bodies of the men were gone. Even the one Shade had stomped was gone. The blood pool was still there, but the body was gone. He grabbed her clothes and hurried back. "Maker why did she bring me to this creepy place. Sure the Templars don't want to come here, but no sane person would either?"

OoO

Leigh woke up with a start. Her hands went instinctively to her waist to find her daggers. When she did not find them she sprang to her feet. A hand came up from beside her making her spin around. The sight that greeted her eyes was a welcome one.

"What happened?"

"Oh not much, just bandits and throat slashing. I guess we are even now. You saved me and now I saved you. Though I wonder how did you stop him from cutting you deeply?"

"I rolled with the knife when he brought it across my throat. It kept him from being able to get it deeper. Rogue trick, but he did get me worse than I expected."

"Good thing I am a healer then."

"Yes good thing. Thank you. I tried to scream, but they stopped me."

"I heard the one scream, that is what brought me running. I'm glad your alright. I don't fancy trying to find my way out of here alone."

"Shade knows the way home."

"Yeah not trusting that." Leigh couldn't help but laugh at his expression as his eyes drifted to the dark figure standing at the edge of the camp.

"I should make sure the fire is set for the night. You better get some sleep." He stood up stopping her from walking away.

"You could have died today and you act like nothing happened. Are you sure your alright?"

"I'm fine." Her eyes told him otherwise.

"Nice try, sit."

"No."

"Please." She growled, but sat back down on her bed roll and let him take her hands. "Why didn't you use your magic against them? They would have never stood a chance."

"My hands, I couldn't move them to cast."

"I see, and your daggers, you left them in a tree?" She nodded and blushed knowing first rule of being a rogue is never to be caught without a weapon or and escape route.

"Stupid huh?"

"No I would never call you that. You kept your head. You did far better than I would have in your place. At least you know how to fight. We aren't aloud to learn to defend ourselves with anything, but our magic."

"That's because they don't want you to be able to defend yourself when they drain your mana."

"Very true, at least you can survive without yours." She gave him a weak smile and squeezed his hand. "I'm sorry about earlier. I acted like a bastard."

"Don't worry about it. I wasn't helping matters any."

"What do you mean you weren't helping?"

"I was giving you mixed signals."

"I know and you were driving me mad. So which signal were you trying to give me? Nevermind, I know which one."

"Are you so sure?" This time she leaned in to him and gave him a very soft chaste kiss. "I'm surprised you would give up so easily after only a few attempts."

"Well I did see what you did to those Templars. I just don't want to be hung from a tree somewhere." She sighed and leaned back against his chest. His fingers twisted some of her hair absentmindedly. It was somewhat refreshing to him to just sit with someone, without worrying about the Templars coming along and making things miserable. Even in this place that gave him the creeps he felt safe with her. "Leo."

"Huh?"

"You said you didn't know my name. It's Leo."

"I like it."

"So where are you taking me and please don't tell me that we are staying here?"

"Just for a few days then I am going to try to get you to Gwaren or somewhere else safe from the Templars. You could take a ship and get out of Ferelden. Just don't head to Kirkwall, I hear it is worse than here for a mage."

"You need coin to do that. I don't have any."

"I do so don't worry. Now get some sleep we have a long way to go tomorrow and the last thing we need is you falling off the horse because you fell asleep."

"Yeah don't want devil horse to trample me if I fall off."

"Be nice, she can hear you." As if to answer he heard the filly snort and paw at the ground. "See."

"Please forgive me Shade. Your a good horse." Leigh stood up and found she was not dressed other than her smallclothes. Her cheeks turned bright red.

"Where are my clothes?"

"Over there, I didn't think you wanted my pawing at you to put them on so I left them off."

"I...thanks." She quickly put on her pants and her linen shirt and caught the disappointed look on the Leo's face. "Are you hungry?"

"Famished."

"Let's see what else my sister packed for us to eat other than stale biscuits. Maybe we'll be lucky and she packed some deer jerky." Leo made a disgusted face, only making her laugh. "Have you ever tried it?"

"Andraste's tits, no it looks disgusting. I would rather starve."

"More for me then."

"You'll be safe from me kissing you then."

"Oh is that all it will take I should have thought of that sooner."

"Hey, you liked it and you know it." Leigh opened her mouth only to find his lips taking over hers and his tongue trying to make it's way down her throat. Her body felt like putty in his hands. When the kiss broke both of them were panting. "See."

"Your incorrigible."

"That I am Dove, that I am."

OoO

Leigh had given up trying to stop Leo from accosting her every time she turned around. Over the last few days since he had saved her from the bandits his hands tended to wander more often then not. She chalked it up to him being raised in the Circle. She had over heard her father and mother talk about it when she was younger. She never truly understood until she got older. She felt almost sorry for him. Even now deep in thought she felt his hands on her hips and his lips on her neck.

"Your doing it again."

"What?"

"Being all handsy."

"You haven't complained about it in a few days, I thought you liked it." She turned around in his arms and stared up at him.

"Oh yes I love being pawed at like a whore in a whorehouse." That stopped him in his tracks. His eyebrow raised at her as his hands fell away from her hips. He looked hurt from her words and Leigh almost regretted saying them. "I know in the Circle this is normal for you, but for me it is a little bit fast."

"I don't...your not..."

"I know you don't think of me as that so calm down. I am just saying it makes me a little bit uncomfortable that's all."

"Maker are all the boys in your little town pledged to the Chantry? Hasn't at least one of them tried to touch you or even kiss you at all?"

"One, but..."

"But what? Did you slit his throat for trying?" Anger flared in her and she pushed him away roughly. "Now what did I say?"

"It is complicated, alright! He...he's a Templar in training." The last part she whispered, but Leo heard it loud and clear.

"Are you mad! Your a mage! He'll turn you into the Circle the first chance he gets!"

"He doesn't know I'm a mage. I have been hiding it from him."

"That won't last you know, as strong as you are he will find out and be honor bound to turn you in."

"He's not like the others, he is a good man."

"Sure right up until he throws you to the wolves or kills you out right. You are playing with fire Dove, and you will get burned." Leo stormed off to the other side of their camp. Leigh could only stand there chewing over his words in her head. Deep down she knew he was right, but she always looked for the best in people. Cullen was not like the other Templars she had seen, he was kind, if not more than a bit awkward around the fairer sex. His stumbling over words when he spoke to her is what endeared him to Leigh. He had only ever kissed her once and it was a quick chaste kiss. Afterward he blushed bright red and excused himself, mumbling along the way. Leigh let out a exhausted sigh and flopped down on the ground. She took out her whet stone and proceeded to sharpen her daggers.

Leo tried not to watch what she was doing, his anger boiled in his blood. How could anyone be so skilled, yet so foolish? Did she not know the danger she was in? Did she not care? He knew all too well the atrocities the Templars set upon the mages at Kinloch Hold. He had watched the Templars beat one of his friends into a bloody pulp just for sassing them. He has seen what happened to the women if they stepped out of line and it made him cringe inside. He did not want to see that happen to her. She would die if she was caged, of that he was certain. He looked up and saw she was watching him. He could see the trails of tears illuminated on her face in the fire light. He felt like an ass for yelling at her like he did, but his pride would not allow him to go apologize. It would show he cared and that could be deadly for him. Her face looked so sad and everything inside him screamed to go over there and hold her.

"_Dammit, why is she looking at me like that? Come on please stop looking at me like that!" _When she realized he was staring at her too, Leigh jumped to her feet and walked out of the firelight. He sat stark still for a few moments trying to hear where she was. The low sound of muffled sobs echoed back to him. "_Shit! I never should have opened my mouth. Irving always said it be my downfall and here it is. I have made a very pretty girl, who saved my sorry hide cry. Maker, just strike me down already before I do something else stupid." _Leo got to his feet and followed the sounds of the crying. He found her not far from the camp sitting next to a downed tree. Her arms were wrapped tightly around her knees. She looked so small to him like this, so young.

"Hey there is no need to cry." She looked up ay him and it made him feel even worse. Her normally pretty face was discolored from her crying. Her eyes were puffy and her face had dirty tear tracks running down her cheeks. "Look the first thing you need to know about me is I'm a bastard. Things come flying out of my mouth before I think. I...I'm sorry I yelled at you, I just don't want to see them cage such a lovely little bird. If they catch you they will break the person you are now and it would kill me to see that." When she did not look up at him Leo sat next to her. His leg brushed up against hers and she flinched away

"Just leave me alone!"

"No." When she looked up he wished he had not said that. Her eyes narrowed at him. "Not until you come back to the camp. It is not safe out here."

"I can take care of myself thank you very much. Just go."

"Nope not getting rid of me that easily. Your going to have to make me leave." Her eyes glowed red like they did that night against the Templars. Leo mentally kicked himself for pushing when he should have just went back to the camp and shut his mouth. "What are you going to hang me from a tree now too?"

"Maker you are the most frustrating person I have ever met!"

"Ah, but I got you to look at me." Her hand flew up to hit him, but Leo was faster. "Sorry Dove I have gotten good at dodging fists aimed for my face. You will have to try better than that." He wasn't sure how he ended up on his back on the ground, but there he was with her straddling his chest. "_All to easy."_ "I think I like it down here. I have a perfect view." Leigh's eyes nearly bugged out of her head when she felt his hands run up her backside. To add to it he gave her rump a firm squeeze making her feel like she was going to jump out of her own skin.

"Get your hands off my arse now!" Leo ran his hands up her sides quickly and pulled her down flush against him. His hands tangled in her hair moving her head so his lips could meet hers. Leigh tried to speak, but his kiss stopped her words dead. After a few seconds of struggling she relented kissing him back. Leigh rolled her hips over his making his mind turn to mush. He could feel the ache between his legs and it made him growl. Startled Leigh broke the kiss and scrambled off of him.

"What did you do that for?"

"I...I'm afraid." Again Leo wanted to kick himself. She was untouched and a novice at all this. He sat up and rubbed the back of his neck absentmindedly before standing up.

"Come on let's get back to camp then." She just nodded and turned toward the camp. He fell into step next to her and wrapped his arm around her neck.

"I'm sorry."

"For what Dove?" Leigh bit her bottom lip, trying to think of what to say. Leo stopped walking and spun her to face him. His hands cupped her face sending shivers down her spine. "I'm the one who yelled at you, making you cry. I should be the one to try and apologize again since you did not take it the last time. I'm sorry Dove for all of it."

"You don't have to apologize, your right I should not trust Templars. I just...I've known him for most of my life. He is friends with my brother, I could never imagine him turning on me or my family."

"Well there's your problem." Leigh gave him a questioning look not sure what he meant by his words. "If he is friends with your brother then you are in trouble. Your brother does not seem the type that likes the fact his family is mostly mages."

"Your right, he doesn't."

"Why?"

"We have to keep to ourselves mostly. He can't have friends come over for dinner or help out on the farm since we don't know who we can trust and who we can't. It is very lonely for him. Cullen seems to be the only friend he has that hasn't left him behind. I feel sorry for my brother, it is not his fault and I hate that he has to suffer so."

"Maybe he is a little jealous too. You and your sister are mages and he is left out."

"Maybe, I can't picture him ever being a mage. Carver rather hit something with his sword or his fists then concentrate on a spell."

"All brawn right? Maker he would make a good Templar then."

"He better not even entertain that thought or I will beat him within a inch of his life." A lopsided smirk played on Leo's lips.

"I would pay to see that." A lone howl in the distance made them both jump. It was followed by other answering the first. "That doesn't sound good."

"No it doesn't we better try to find higher ground to sleep on."

"What about your horse?"

"Shit, your right. If it is a pack of wolves she will never stand a chance. We need to pack up and move."

"Get her saddled I will get our packs." The howls got closer as Leigh saddled the filly. Leo rolled up their beds and threw water on the fire. The smoke made it hard to see so he used his staff and cast light from it. What he saw in the brush not ten feet from him was at least a dozen glowing eyes. Panic rooted him to the spot as the eyes got closer. The thudding of hooves came from behind him and he felt Leigh tug on his sleeve.

"Slowly get your arse up here. I will keep my eyes on them." He nodded handing the packs up to her and slowly pulled himself into the saddle behind her. Shade gave a shrill whinny and stomped her feet nervously. "Alright girl, let's go!" Leo was lurched backward as the filly took off like she had a fireball on her tail. The wolves gave chase for a while, but gave up when they could not keep pace with the horse. They traveled the rest of the night heading toward the Brecilian Forest. Leo fell asleep sometime before dawn and Leigh had shift their positions. She stopped Shade and quickly, quietly moved so she would be behind him, holding him up in the saddle. "Well at least one of us will be rested." Leigh chuckled to herself hearing his snore a little. "Alright Shade just another hour or two and we get to rest. I just have to find a place to hide." The horse threw her head up and down before walking on.

OoO

Leo opened his eyes and saw that Leigh was not in front of him on the horse. He felt arms wrapped around his waist and looked back. Her smiling face greeted him and he relaxed. She pressed her lips to his neck and he sighed.

"Good morning."

"Morning, where are we?"

"Somewhere near the Brecilian Forest. I think we are about a week away from Gwaren. Once we are there I will make sure you get on a ship."

"What if I want to stay?"

"You can't they will hunt you down and find you."

"Then come with me."

"I can't leave my family, not without saying goodbye."

"Then head back and we can do that."

"If I head back they might still be there. After I embarrassed them they probably brought more with them. I can't do that to my parents or my siblings. They'll kill them."

"Forget I said it then. It was just a errant thought." Leigh stopped Shade and got down. Leo followed suit and kept the horse between the two of them.

"You don't even know me other than I saved you and I'm also a mage. Why would you want me to stay with you?"

"Those Templars did not stand a chance against you. It was like their abilities did not work on your magic. Your a handy person to be around when Templars come calling."

"So you want me around just to protect you?"

"Not just to do that, I kinda like having you around. You are smart, capable and sexy."

"So if I was ugly you would not be asking me to stick around?"

"Maker's breath woman, why does everything have to be a fight with you? I can be sincere when I want to be. I'm not lecherous all the time you know."

"Could have fooled me with all the pawing you have been doing." Leo halted his walk and stared at the ground. He clenched his hands into fists and tried to fight his annoyance with her.

"No wonder none of the boys in your town want you. Your just a frigid tease!"

"I am not!"

"Could have fooled me." He knew using her words against her was low, but he had enough. Not even the girls in the Tower ran this hot and cold. "I am choosy with who I have slept with thank you. You haven't lived like I have. You were born free. You have never had to suffer under the Templars' hands. You have never been thrown in solitary confinement with your only companion being a cat. So you have no right to judge how I am. I have to take pleasure where I can, because I don't know if the next time might be my last. Mages that live to a rip old age normally take the abuses in stride and don't make waves. They have resigned themselves to their fate. I can't do that. I want a life. I want freedom. You have that, your free, you have parents that would fight to keep you safe. My father was glad to be rid of me, he was the one who turned me in to the Templars. You have no idea how jealous I am of you." Leigh's eyes brimmed with tears and she went to reach for him hand, but Leo pulled it away. "Just forget it. I don't need your help, go back home to your perfect life and forget you ever met me." He stormed by her and Shade heading back the way they had came. Leigh watched him go not sure what to do. The sound of him shooting lightning at a tree made her jump and curse. She leaned her head on Shade's neck and sighed.

"What should I do girl? If I let him go he will get himself into trouble and if I go after him he might just fry me. Ugh, I will never understand why men are so infuriating." The filly nudged her in the direction the mage had stormed off in. Leigh looked into the horse's yellow eyes and sighed. "Your right, I am the one who made him mad I need to at least apologize." She hopped up into the saddle and took off after Leo. It did not take her long to find him since he left a trail of burnt trees behind him. "Wait please!" When he did not turn around Leigh jumped off the horse and ran at him. He heard her coming and turned around to tell her off again, but she pounced on him, knocking him over. "I'm sorry."

"For what treating me like I am some lecher or for knocking me over?"

"Both. Your right I have no idea what you have been through and I'm not use to having any man around me other than my brother and my father. Cullen doesn't count because he is as bad at this as I am."

"I'll forgive you if you do something for me."

"Anything."

"Be careful what you say Dove I might hold you to it. First I need you to get off of me and help me up. The rocks from the road are sticking me in places that are not very comfortable." Leigh stood up and hauled him to his feet. "And secondly I would like a kiss."

"If you want me to kiss where it hurts forget it." She stuck her tongue out at him to let him know she was kidding. She soon found that was a mistake when his lips collided with hers. This kiss was not gentle and neither were his hands as they roughly pressed her against him. He pulled his head away only a fraction to gulp a breath of air.

"Maker you drive me crazy."

"In a good way or a bad way?"

"Both, I am trying to be a gentleman, but I don't know how long I am going to be able to hold back."

"I'd hate to see what you would be like when you lose control. I guess my clothes would be in trouble." Leo growled and gave her another bruising kiss.

"You would be in trouble if I lose control not just your clothes."

"Oh you say such sweet things." Leo snorted a laugh and pulled her up in a tight hug.

"No wonder you drive me insane Dove, you are just like me. Sarcastic as hell."

"Maker help the world."

"I was thinking the same thing. Now shall we head to Gwaren."

"I think we should, just keep you eyes open for a place for us to rest. You got sleep last night I did not."

"Only by a few hours. We need to find a building to sleep in. It will be safer."

"I agree. I would love to find a place with a bed and a tub."

"I can get behind that thought."

"Your doing it again."

"Yes, yes I am. I told you I am at the end of my control when it comes to you."

"Come on let's get going before something else happens to us..." Leo put his hand over her mouth before she could list things that could happen to them.

"Don't say it or even think about anything. We have already dealt with bandits and wolves. I am not tempting anything else to come get us." She nodded her head and gently took the hand that covered her mouth.

"We should walk and save Shade if we need a quick escape. I don't want to overtire her."

"You know better than I about farm animals. I know cats and that is about it."

"That explains a lot."

"What?"

"Cats are aloof and only show affection when they want something, just like you."

"Ouch, take the knife out of my heart. I bet your a dog person."

"I would be if we had one."

"If you never had one how do you know your a dog person?"

"We had one when I was very young. He was my father's before he and my mother married. He died protecting my father from a bear when we first came to Lothering. I have a few good memories of him. I think my father is afraid to get another dog because of what happened to him."

"See this is why cats are better they have nine lives."

"Which life are you on?"

"I have escaped five times from the tower so I am on my fifth one right now. Four more to go right?"

"Well if I have anything to do about it you will keep the rest of your lives."

"Is that a promise Dove?"

"It's a promise." The rest of the day they walked in relative silence. Leo felt her hand entwine with his. He felt the callouses on her thumb and pointer finger. He had about the same callouses from his mage's staff, but hers seemed to be from using the evil looking daggers that hung from her belt. He hoped to never be on the receiving of those things. They traveled til the the sun set. Their hope of finding a structure to sleep was dashed so they decided to find shelter in a cluster of oak trees. Leo let her sleep first since Leigh looked like she was ready to fall over from exhaustion. He watched her sleep wondering how she fairs in the Fade. He had only run across a few demons in the Fade. He had been lucky since one of the spirits he had run into marked him with a symbol on his head, demons gave him a wide berth. It was this spirit who first told him he was a healer and that he was one day going to be important. He was twelve and thought she was crazy. Sitting here free told him that maybe she had been a little bit right. Leo shook his head and settled himself against the tree to keep watch. They had been lucky so far with the weather staying mild, but luck was about to run out.


	25. Chapter 25

Leo cursed loudly as another peal of thunder sounded in the sky. Both he and Leigh were soaked to the bone from the driving rain. They had taken refuge under a tree, but it did little to keep them dry. He could feel his body begin to shake from the cold rain. The slight framed woman next to him was shaking more violently. He took her hands in his and they felt like ice. He swore even louder this time knowing if he did not get her warmed up soon she would get very sick, very fast. A new sound greeted his ear, Leigh's teeth began chattering loudly. He began to rub her arms to warm them up.

"I need you to stay awake Dove. Talk to me."

"W...www...what..a...a...bout?"

"Anything, everything I don't care just talk."

"I...ca...can't."

"Yes you can. Call me names, poke fun at me, anything to keep awake."

"I...don...don't want to di...die."

"You won't I promise you that." Leo tried to look out into the storm to see if he could find Shade, but it seems she had run off. Having no idea where exactly they were or what town they might be near was not helping either. In the distance he saw a light, he had to blink a few times to make sure it wasn't just wishful thinking. After a few minutes he could tell it was getting closer. Soon it was clear to him that someone was coming their way. At this point he didn't care if it was Templars or not. He had to get Leigh to shelter or lose her to hypothermia. He cupped his hands to his mouth and stared to yell. "Hello is anyone out there? We need help, please!" The light continue ever closer til the owner of the light came into view.

"Tis not a night to be out." The woman was wearing a heavy leather cloak that seemed to repeal the cold rain. In her hand she had a staff and the light Leo had seen was coming from the top of it. "Your friend does not look well."

"She's not. Please we need shelter so I can help her. We are both apostates like you, please help us." The young woman's golden eyes stared at him. For a second he could have sworn he had seen eyes like this before, but he could not for the life of him think of where.

"Follow me then. I know a place you can take shelter. I shall carry your packs. You carry her." Leo nodded and scooped Leigh up in his arms. She was trembling so violently that he had a hard time holding on to her. The cloaked woman waited patiently for him to get a better grip and led him into the woods. "There is a hunting cabin up ahead that is for now abandoned. You shall be safe there for the next few days."

"Thank you."

"I would not thank me yet. Your friend, she is in a lot of trouble. I hope you have healing herbs with you and food."

"We have some. I don't think she was planning for us to be out here this long."

"Ah and here it is. Take her inside and stripe her wet clothes off. I will build a fire for you before I go."

"Go? Your just going to leave us?"

"I am no healer. You on the other hand are. It is up to you to save her. I have helped enough by getting you shelter and volunteering to make a fire for you. Be grateful for that."

"I am, but..."

"You waste precious time questioning. Do as I said and get those clothes off of her." Leo ran through the cabin door and set Leigh on the smaller of the three beds that adorned the place. He was thankful she had decided not to put her leather armor back on since he had no idea how to take it off. As quickly as he could Leo striped Leigh of her clothes. He kept his mind on task and did not let it register in his brain that she was now naked . The mysterious woman busied herself making a raging fire in the hearth while Leo wrapped Leigh up in heavy blankets. "You will have to take off your wet clothes too. She will need your body heat to bring hers back to the way it was."

"I...Holy Maker, she is going to kill me for this."

"If you save her life I doubt it. The fire is set and there are your packs. I wish you luck."

"Thank you...I did not catch your name."

"I did not give it, let us just say I am a fellow apostate and leave it at that. Take care of her." Without another word the woman was gone.

"Maker's breath what in the name of Andraste did I do to deserve this?" He peeled his clothes off and hung them on a rack near the fire. He did the same with her clothes before heading to the bed. Her body was still shaking hard. "Maker, I know you and I are not on good terms, but if you could find it in your heart to not let her kill me for this I would greatly appreciate it." As if to answer him a loud crack of thunder made him jump. He scrambled into the bed and pulled her body close to his. In his mind he thought of things to keep him from the thought of having a naked girl in his arms. Her body was so cold next to his, her lips were almost blue. He gently pulled her head to his chest and let it rest there. "You promised to keep me alive Dove, now it is my turn. I won't let you die on me." Sometime later that night her body stopped shaking and fear clenched his heart. He gently shook her shoulder and she moaned.

"Cut it out Carver. I will get up when I am ready." She rolled her body over away from his warmth. Her body now burned with fever and her thoughts were clouded. Leo went to get some of the herbs out of his pack to help bring down the fever. It took him longer than he had wanted to brew the potion enough to be potent. Leo could hear Leigh's chattering teeth again since she uncovered herself. He could not help his eyes roving over her body. He quickly closed his eyes and shook his head to get the imagines of depravity out of his head. He was a man after all, but he was also a healer and right now she needed him on his game. He covered her back over and gently held her up to help her drink the potion he had made.

"Dove, open your eyes." Leigh's eyes opened and rolled around trying to focus on him. "I need you to drink this, it will make you feel better." Her eyes stared into his and he felt a jolt go through him. He saw trust in her eyes. It was something he had never seen before.

"Don't...l...leave...mm...me." Her voice broke his heart. The fear in it made her sound like a very young child. He pulled her up enough that she could rest on his chest. He let his lips brush the crown of her head before bringing the vial to her lips.

"I'm not going anywhere. Now drink this down it will help you sleep. I promise I will be right here when you wake." She gave him a weak smile and swallowed the bitter potion. Her lips puckered up from the taste and he could not help himself. He brushed his lips against hers. The bitter taste of the potion did not phase him as he deepened the kiss. She gave another shutter and it brought him back to reality. She needed rest and warmth. As much as he wanted to keep kissing her he knew that she was delirious with fever and he would not take advantage of her like this. "You need to sleep Dove." Leo shifted them to fit better in the small bed. Her scorching body laid on top of his. He was gentleman enough to keep a sheet between them, so as not to tempt him further. The sounds of the storm seemed to kick up again as he drifted off to sleep.

OoO

The sound of birds chirping woke Leigh out of a sound sleep. Her dreams had been improper at best. She knew she had had a fever, but even that could not have brought on those vivid dreams. The feel of a warm body next to hers made her eyes snap open. All she could see was the broad chest of whoever was holding her. She slowly tipped her head up to get a look at the face those arms and chest belonged to. She relaxed a little seeing the stubbly chin, then the loose blonde hair that had fallen out of his hair tie. Her hand slowly reached up to brush the hair out of his face, only to get caught up in his own hand.

"Morning Dove."

"Good Morning." Her eyes roamed around the room before returning to his face. "Where are we?"

"I assume a hunting lodge of some kind. That or someone who has a trap fetish. Just don't look in the closet over there."

"How long have I been sleeping?"

"Four days. I was starting to worry about you. It took two days to stop your shivering and another to break your fever." The expression of concern in his eyes made her insides turn to jelly. His warm brown eyes seemed to bore right through her soul. Leigh shivered again, only to feel him rub her arms to warm her up. The friction of his touch made her blood sing in her ears. "Your not getting cold again are you?"

"No, just a left over shiver that's all." As her body and mind became more awake, Leigh realized she wasn't wearing any clothes. Even her smallclothes were gone. Suddenly she felt very exposed and her cheeks turned bright red.

"Are you sure your alright? Your face looks flushed again. Here let me take a look." Her eyes went wide when she felt his hands on the sides of her neck. Her hands flew up and smacked his away. "I'm not trying to cop a feel, I just want to make sure your out of the woods."

"Where are my clothes?" Her voice came out much higher pitched then she wanted. The hurt look he gave her made her feel very ungrateful to all the help he had given her. "I...I"

"It's fine. I'll get them for you and go outside to give you privacy." Leo hopped off the bed and handed her her clothes. It looked like he had cleaned them for her as well. She waited til he had left the cabin to unwrap herself from the sheet and went to the wash bin he had set up for her. She quickly washed herself down. Once she was satisfied she was clean Leigh dressed in her leather pants and a loose fitting linen shirt. Her boots were still wet so she placed them by the fire to hopefully get them dry before they would have to leave. She did not want to have to travel with wet boots. She had seen her father treat foot rot once before and she did not want to get it. She did find a pair of boots that were a bit big, but would do for now. Her stomach rumbled at her. She decided to find Leo and see if he wanted to eat. She had no memory of how they got to the cabin so when she stepped outside she had no idea where they were.

"Leo?"

"Over here." He was standing with his back to her and she noticed he still was not wearing a shirt. The muscles in his back were well defined despite being a mage. Again a shiver a pleasure ran down her spine. The more time she spent around him the more she realized she was starting to have a crush on him. Maybe more than that. She made her way to him and stood beside him. His hand came up and pointed to the sky line. "It looks like we are in for more of the same. Those clouds look menacing."

"At least we have a roof over our heads and fire wood." Her stomach growled again, loud enough that he heard it and began to giggle.

"Now we just need food. Your family didn't pack enough for us to be gone this long. I don't know how to hunt or I would have while you were asleep."

"What do you want fish or rabbit?"

"You can hunt?" His eyebrow raised and a sense of jealousy ran through him. She could survive anywhere and he would be lucky to not become worm food.

"My father had us learn how to survive if we had to run again and got separated. I am alright with a bow and I am deadly with a fishing spear."

"There is a small lake over that hill maybe there are some fish in there."

"Alright, let me see what this place has in the way of hunting implements. You should stay here and get the fire ready."

"How bout I set the fire and go with you. Your still getting over being sick. I want to make sure you stay well."

"Yes dad." He rolled his eyes at her.

"Just get your spear and let's go. The storm is moving fast and I don't relish being out in it." They wasted no time on getting to the lake. Leigh proved she was indeed good at spear fishing. By the time they left the lake they had enough fish to last them for a few days. Leo made sure the fire was nice and set for the rest of the night. The storm blew in and the sound of the rain pounding on the roof was deafening. They ate in relative silence through dinner. Mostly because both of them were too busy eating a good meal for the first time in over a week. Leo finally put his plate down sufficiently stuffed and unwilling to move from in front of the fire.

"Did you enjoy dinner?" Leigh's eyed him hopefully.

"Maker woman you keep cooking like that and I will get fat."

"And we wouldn't want that would we?" She gave him a smirk as he glared at her.

"You will pay for that Dove." Leigh shrieked as he tackled her to the floor. His fingers skimmed over her sides and after a while she couldn't breath from him tickling her.

"St...Stop...I...I can..."

"Never mess with a mage." He did not notice her lifting her leg in between his, she used it to roll him forward off of her. He was stunned she had moved that quick, even more stunned that she did not knee him in the groin. It seemed she took great pain on not hurting him there. He was now flat on his back and found her leaning over him the same way he had leaned over her. Her fingers danced up his sides and his chest under the shirt he had put on before dinner.

"You forget I am also a mage." Her eyes gleamed at him with affection.

"And now that you have me down here what do you plan on doing with me Dove?"

"I don't plan on doing anything with you on the floor..." Disappointment passed over his face and a bit of annoyance mixed in. He did not notice a secret smile cross her lips.

"Then would you please let me up. The floor is not exactly comfortable." She leaned down and whispered in his ear. Her breath tickled his ear and neck sending a shock wave straight to his groin.\

"I said I wasn't going to do anything with you on the floor, but I didn't say I wouldn't do anything with you on the bed." Leigh never saw anyone move as fast as he did to get them off the floor. His hands felt like they were everywhere on her body as he pushed her back toward the bed. His lips locked possessively on hers. She moaned as he nipped at her lower lip only to soothe the area with his tongue. Leigh's mind turned to mush at his caresses. She felt the softness of the bed on her back and the weight of him on top of her. Her heart felt like it was trying to beat itself right out of her chest. She did not dare open her eyes for fear she would lose her nerve and not go through with this.

"Open your eyes Dove." She shook her head and kept her eyes slammed shut. "Please." His voice was so soft it sounded like it was coming from far away. Her eyes flew open and met his gaze. "Are you sure you want this?"

"I'm sure, I guess I am just nervous. You have obviously done this before and I don't want to ruin this by being horrible at it." Leo's smile warmed and he leaned down kissing her softly.

"You can't ruin it Dove so don't worry about that. I will warn you it does hurt the first time for a woman, so it is a good thing I am a healer. I can ease the pain a bit. I don't want you to think you have to do this because ….." Leigh's finger pressed to his lips to silence him.

"That is not the reason I want to. I want to be with someone who is like me even if it is only for one night. You kinda came out of the blue, but I'm glad you did.

"What were the chances of me coming down here and running into you? I mean really, most people would have turned me in or not even have bothered helping me, let alone save my sorry hide from those Templars. I know how much danger I put you and your family in. And yet here you are still with me keeping me safe, making sure I get out of Ferelden. I can never repay you for what you have done for me."

"You don't have to. Helping a fellow apostate is the right thing to do." His lips delved for hers again kissing her sweetly. Slowly his hands moved her shirt up to reveal the plains of her stomach and the fact she wasn't wearing a breast band. Heat flashed through his body making him hard. Even though her skin felt silky, he could feel small scars on her sides.

"What are these from?"

"Dagger practice. I tried to be a show off and flip them around like a master duelist and I cut myself a lot. My upper arms are worse." He lifted her shirt off and saw the small ghosts of scars that adorned her pale skin. He ran a finger over the longer one that was much broader. "That one was from my brother and his great sword. I didn't dodge fast enough, thankfully my Papa was close by. The cut was right down to the bone."

"So your family has a warrior, and three mages. Now I feel a bit sorry for your brother, he must feel left out."

"He is rather surly about it, but he is not the only fighter in our house. I am a rogue hence the pair of daggers I have strapped to my sides most of the time."

"Beautiful and deadly, my kind of woman." She giggled and wrapped her arms around his neck pulling him back down on top of her. The feeling of his erection against her hip made her blood boil in her veins. "Do you want me?" His voice was husky in her ear. Leigh could hear the lust in it. The feel of his tongue tracing the outside shell of her ear drove her to distraction. Her mouth could not form the words he wanted to hear. She moaned loudly and rocked her hips up to meet his. Leo took that as his answer and began to slowly peal her leather pants off her body. Leigh grunted in frustration on how long he was taking to get her naked. His thumbs hooked her smallclothes and shimmied them off her with her pants. She fought against her modesty to let him.

"Your over dressed." Leigh's voice trembled with need.

"I am aren't I. Would you like to help me?" She swallowed hard and nodded. His hands guided hers to his trousers. Her fingers shook and she looked up into his eyes for reassurance. He smiled at her and took her hands in his pulling her up so she was on her knees on the bed.

"I told you I would ruin this."

"No Dove, your not. Here let me." Leo stood up and with one smooth motion took off both his trousers and smallclothes. Leigh watched him in fascination. His eyes held hers as he came back to the bed and gently laid her back down. "Are you ready?"

"Yes." Leo held himself over her on one hand while his other pushed her legs apart. He heard her breath catch as he poised himself at her entrance. He lowered himself to kiss her lips as he entered her. Healing magic poured into her easing some of the pain, but she still cried out against his mouth. Leo let out a groan at the feeling of how tight she was. He had never been with a virgin. All the women he had been with were normally far older than him and much more experienced. Slowly he moved to let her get use to the feel of him inside her. The sharp pain of her nails digging into his skin made him stop moving. Her eyes were slammed shut and she was biting her lower lip to keep from screaming in pain.

"Do you want me to stop?" He really didn't want to stop, but he also didn't want to continue hurting her.

"N...no." Leigh lifted her hips up letting him in completely. Leo hissed with pleasure and rocked his hips down in a fluid thrust. Leigh moaned, arching her back off the bed. Leo slipped his arm under the small of her back keeping her back arched, loving the way it felt inside her in this position. His lips made their way from the base of her throat to hers. Leo felt the pangs of his need build, but he held them back. He was not going to selfish tonight. He wanted her first time to be more than just a quickie. Leigh's hands ran down his back leaving scratch marks from her nails. He hissed as she added more pressure. Her hands rested on the small of his back pulling him against her harder.

"You have no idea what you are doing to me right now Dove. Maker's breath you feel so good." Leo picked up his pace only to slow it down again. Leigh mewled louder and louder with each crash of their hips. She swore her body was about to shatter. Leo noticed she was on the edge and decided to take her over it. His movements became erratic and Leigh clung to him tight as she climaxed. She cried out to the heavens chanting his name. Leo followed soon after, using the arm he had under her to roll her with him so he did not collapse on top of her. His breathing came out in broken gasps and his heart which had been racing began to slow finally. Leigh buried her head in the crook of his neck, still shaking in ecstasy. His hand reached up and began to smooth her hair. "Are you alright Dove?"

"I...Holy Maker I never dreamed it would feel like that."

"Should I take that as a good thing or a bad?" Leigh tilted her head up and gave him a gentle kiss.

"I would have to say very good." A smug smile graced his lips.

"I aim to please My Lady." Her body gave one final shiver before falling asleep in his arms. Leo pulled the covers over their bodies and let himself drift off.

OoO

Leigh stirred as the light of the morning sun came through the window. A strange weight around her made her freeze. Her eyes slowly went up the naked chest that belonged to the arms wrapped around her.

"Good morning." Hearing Leo's voice made her relax.

"Morning, you hungry?" She went to get up only to have him pull her back to him. His hips ground into hers.

"The only thing I want to eat right now is you."

"I..." His lips silenced her and his hands roamed her still naked body. His fingers teased her thighs coaxing her to part her legs giving him better access. She moaned into his mouth as his fingers dipped into her sex. Her back arched when his thumb found the pearl of nerves and began to swirl around it. "Maker, Leo..."

"I plan on showing you everything I know before I leave you Dove. This way you will never forget me." A keen wail sounded from her as he teased her to completion. He did not give her much time to recover before flipping them over and settling her on his hips. He arched his hips up enticing her to take him into her. Her eyebrow arched at him and she shook her head. She lifted herself up and ran her hands over his chest. Small sparks of electricity cracked off her finger tips. Leo squirmed under her touch. His breath caught in his lungs and his eyes watched as she went lower with her touch. "I...I thought you have never done this before?"

"I haven't done this to anyone else, but myself." His smile turned lecherous. "I'm not hurting you am I?" He groaned as she went lower. The closer she got to his erection the more his hips bucked. None of the other women he had ever been with did this to him and he knew damn well that some of them were good at lightning spells. Her control amazed him.

"You have to teach me how to do this Dove."

"As long as you keep your promise and show me everything you know." He growled and flipped her, pinning Leigh under him. Leigh let out a amused giggle that Leo silenced with a passionate kiss. "A girl could get use to this you know?" Leo pulled his face away from hers and gave her a sad look. "What?"

"Unless a lot of things change Dove there is no way we could ever be together more than we are now."

"I know." Her answer surprised him. He was expecting her to get all possessive and needy.

"You understand?"

"Of course I do. My father was once a Circle mage, he explained what that means. I have been told from a young age to never expect a normal life. If I ever found someone who would except me for what I am I was to try to hold on to them, but even that could be fleeting."

"So your not going to turn all...

"Oh Maker you can't leave me, no I'm not. I don't wish you to go by any means, but I do understand you have to." Leo pulled her up, wrapping her in a tight embrace.

"Maker, you're amazing."

"So are you." They both laid back down in the bed giving into their desires. It was well into the afternoon before they emerged from the cabin. The storm from the night before left a lot of tree branches down around the cabin. "I'm glad we had a place to weather the storm." Leo nodded and went to gather more fire wood. "I'm going to go hunting unless you want fish again?"

"Well since the fish you caught yesterday look like they blew away in the storm I would have to say fish are out Dove."

"Alright I will go see if I can find some rabbit or quail. Stay here."

"Oh no we are not splitting up. Where you go I go."

"I would normally say yes, but you sound like a herd of brontos stomping through the woods. You'll scare away all the animals." Leo folded his arms over his chest and stood to his full height over her. He was a good half foot taller, but Leigh was not easily intimidated. Her younger brother Carver was over a foot taller than her and far stronger than her physically and she could still knock him on his arse. She walked up to him and stared up into his amber eyes. "I know you think if you give me that look I will listen to you, but you have to do better than that serah."

"Maker you are a frustrating woman. Alright, alright! But you better hurry back. I..."

"I know, I won't be long. If someone comes shoot a fireball up in the air or scream. I won't be far away." She stood on her toes and kissed his chin. Leo ducked his head down so their lips could meet. His heart clenched a bit and he wasn't sure why.

"You better hurry back, I might get lonely and run off with the next pretty apostate that comes to my rescue." He gave her a evil smile and she just rolled her eyes at him.

"You won't find anyone who enjoys your charm the way I do."

"True, or who would do that electricity trick you do. I guess I won't run away, but please be careful."

"I will, chop some firewood and I will be back before you know it." Leo watched her leave before turning to the ax next to the pile of wood. He started chopping when a cold shiver crept up his back. He turned around to see if there was something behind him only to be wrapped up in vines. At first he thought it was Leigh having seen her do the same thing to the Templars that had chased him. When the vines tightened around his body and covered his mouth he knew it wasn't her.

"Well, well look at what we have here." A older woman stalked out of the shadows, her clothes were shabby and her yellow eyes reminded him of the young girl who helped them days ago. "Care to tell me why you are squatting in my cabin?"

"Mhumm." The vines moved to let him speak. "We were stuck out in the storm that passed over here less than a week ago. My friend was suffering from hypothermia, I had to find us shelter."

"And that gives you the right to take up residence in my home?"

"A girl brought us here and said we could stay here." The woman eyed him like he was lying as the vines squeezed around him tighter. Leo tried to scream, but the vines covered his mouth again. He struggled and thrashed against his bindings.

"The more you move the tighter they will get til the life is all but crushed from your body." Leo stopped moving, his eyes were wider than tea saucers. "You have no idea what she is do you?" He shook his head afraid to move anymore. "She will be the champion of our kind. No Templar can stand against her, nor any mage. Demons will bend to her will if she commands it and spirits will fight for her if she asks. She must survive or we are lost." Leo whimpered as the vines began to cut into his skin. "She favors you doesn't she? Be grateful for that. I do not wish her to hunt me down just yet." Tears slid down Leo's cheeks from fear and pain as the old woman drew nearer. She went to touch him only to be repulsed by something. He could see the smoke coming off her hand from where she had touched his forehead. "I should have known!" The old woman hissed. "You are marked. Fate smiles on even the fools or should I say Mercy. Her protection will only carry you so far boy." The vines loosened around his face and only slightly around his body. Leo knew his silver tongue would not help him here.

"Please let me go and we will leave. I'm sorry we intruded, but she would have died had we not."

"So I have been told, as I said it is one of the reasons you still live. For as strong as she is, she is still a mortal and fragile. Her body as well as her spirit can easily be broken. I am curious to see if she will stay the same person she is now or will life break her. Only time will tell." The vines dropped him to the ground. Leo gripped his side, gasping and coughing. "You may stay here for a while longer, but your time with her is fleeting. You must leave her behind when you get to wherever it is you intend to hide."

"And what if she won't leave me?"

"Then you will have to do whatever it takes to make her leave you. Your a smart lad, use your head."

"I..." The old woman held up her hand to silence him.

"It will be kinder to leave her behind for now, than to keep her with you and risk the Templars getting her."

"For now?"

"Fate is a funny thing, it might be in the cards that you both will meet again, but who can tell the future."

"I...I understand. I don't wish harm to ever come to her. She has been far kinder to me than anyone else I have ever met."

"Good lad, heal yourself and get back to the firewood before she gets back. And be a good lad and not tell her about me or our conversation or I shall have to let my vines finish their job."

"I...I won't, I doubt she would believe me even if I told her."

"Smart lad." The old woman turned into a swarm of bugs leaving Leo stunned and shaken. He looked down at his shirt and found it ripped to shreds. The thorns had left deep scratches and pin pricks all over his chest and back. On shaky legs Leo stumbled into the cabin stripping his bloody shirt from him and throwing it into the fire. He healed himself and washed the blood away disposing of the bloody water when he was done. He could not stop his body from shaking, all he wanted was for Leigh to return at least then he knew he was safe. The old witch did not look to keen on trying to fight her, which was a good thing. Something told him if it came to that the witch would use him against the young girl. It was not something he wanted.

"I see you worked up a sweat chopping wood, your shirt is off again." He forgot he did not shut the door when he had stumbled in, to find her standing there with a few rabbits in hand made relief spread over him.

"Well it might also be that you like looking at my bare chest that makes me want to not wear it." She gave him a small swat on the arm and set herself to clean the rabbits off for cooking. Leo tried to calm his racing pulse and sound normal. The last thing he wanted was to have that old woman come back.

"Oh guess who I found while I was out hunting?"

"Shade?"

"Yes, poor thing is pretty beat up. I was wondering if you could heal her for me?"

"Two conditions. First your out there with me when I heal her and second, well really this should have been first come over here and kiss me." Leigh gave him a wry smile and crossed the room. Leo wrapped her up in his arms and buried his head in the crook of her shoulder. His body was still a bit shaky and did not go unnoticed by Leigh.

"What's wrong?"

"My mind played tricks on me and I thought I saw..."

"I understand, I jump at every sound and shadow too." Her arms tightened their hold on him trying to bring him comfort as her lips slanted over his. He leaned into the kiss making it deeper. He pushed her back against a wall pinning her there. She lightly pushed his shoulders to break the kiss. "First heal Shade, then we can have some fun."

"Alright but afterward we finish what we started."

"Try to stop me."

"I've created a monster haven't I?"

"Well you do have a lot of things to show me and I still have to teach you the electricity trick. I would prefer to call this a learning experience."

"Funny you don't look like a school marm to me."

"You'll pay for that serah I swear it."

"Aw Dove I like to be punished, the rougher the better." When the crimson flush blessed her cheeks he knew he got her flustered. She turned away from him to try to regain her composure. He let his arms slip around her waist and rested his chin on her shoulder. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to push it that far. I speak before I think. I keep forgetting you are new to this."

"You just caught me off guard. My virgin ears are not use to such talk." Leo nibbled on her ear eliciting a groan from her. "Leo please I need you to heal Shade first."

"As you wish my lady." He headed for the door with her right behind him. The filly was standing close to where he had been attacked earlier in the day. Leigh went to Shade's head and spoke calming words. Her hands stroked the filly's forehead as Leo looked her over. "Poor thing looks like she ran through a bramble patch. Her legs are covered in small cuts and I can feel bruising under her skin."

"But nothing is broken?"

"Nope, looks like she was lucky in the respect. Just keep talking to her this should take but a moment." He poured healing magic into the filly, but something in the back of his head did not feel right as he healed her. It felt more like healing a human, not an animal. He shook his head to clear it. "_Must be still shaken up from the visit the old lady bestowed upon me. My magic is a bit off."_ Once he was satisfied she was thoroughly healed he turned back to Leigh. "All done."

"Thank you and Shade thanks you too. I better clean the rabbits and start them cooking."

"Yum rabbit."

"Hey you could always eat deer jerky if rabbit isn't to your liking." He gagged. "I thought that would change your mind. Really if you ever hope to survive outside the Tower you must learn to eat what you can get your hands on or you will starve. A weak mage is much easier to catch than a healthy one."

"Very true. That's normally how they are able to catch me."

"Stick with me and I will show you the ropes of Templar evasion. I learned from the best."

"Your father."

"Yes, he has been free for a little over seventeen years."

"That sounds wonderful. I hope one day I can say that."

"I hope so too Leo. I would hate to think of you caged again."

"Not as much as I would hate to see you caged ever. You have been good to me Dove, far better than I ever deserved. The Maker smiled on me the day I met you." Another crimson blush graced her cheeks. "I am starting to enjoy making the blood rush to those perfect cheeks." He cupped her face and kissed her. "Now go cook our rabbit woman." She turned and he swatted her in the ass. She let out a yelp and glared at him. He chuckled and turned his back on her, a mistake he will never make again. He heard the lightning before he felt it hit his ass. "What in the Void was that for?"

"For smacking my ass, I reserve the right to shoot lightning at fools and you serah should know better."

"I will give you that one, but Maker that hurt."

"Don't worry I will kiss it and make it all better after I start our lunch." She spun on her heels and went back into the cabin. Leo stared at her retreating form. His hand absentmindedly rubbed his ass cheek.

"I can't believe she did that. Maker's balls that hurt. She is so going to pay." He plotted his revenge while waiting for lunch. He was lost in thought when the sound of an angelic voice reached his ears. He crept up to the window and saw Leigh sitting at the spit over the fire singing softly to herself. Her voice was sultry and sweet all at the same time. He couldn't help himself as he sat down and listened.

"Flowers fade, the fruits of summer fade. They have their seasons so do we, but please promise me that sometimes you will think of me." The strange feeling of his heart fluttering made Leo uncomfortable. It was if she was singing to him, begging him to remember her, to think of her once in a while. She stopped singing and was now humming the same tune. Leo smacked his head against the side of the cabin trying to stop the feeling that had begun welling up in him. The feeling he was having was not new to him, not really. He had loved the first girl he had been with only to have his world crushed when she died during her Harrowing. He vowed never again, his heart was closed to such feelings, but now he felt them creeping up on him.

"How long have you been sitting there?" His eyes snapped open and found her staring down at him.

"Not long, your voice is amazing." Again the blush he had come to love swept up her neck to the cheeks. "I dare say you could have given Andraste a run for her sovereigns."

"I...thank you."

"What were you singing?"

"It is called Think of Me."

"Was that for me?" Leigh wrung her hands together and stared at the ground. Leo rose to his feet, wrapping his arms around her. "Dove, I will never forget you as long as I live." She turned in his arms to rest her head on his chest. "Can you teach me the song later?"

"You really want to learn it?"

"Yes, so when I think of it, I will think of you." Leo led her back in and helped her finish cooking. After eating they went outside and laid in a sun soaked patch near the cabin. Leigh sang to him the song over and over til he could sing it word for word with her. They stayed laying side by side til the sun had long started to set. Leo helped Leigh to her feet before sweeping her up and taking her back indoors. The rest of the night was spent in the bed tangled together making good on the promise to never forget the other. Both knowing all too soon they would have to say goodbye.

**The song Think of Me is from Phantom of the Opera. It belongs to Andrew Llyod Webber I own nothing. Again thank you to all my readers for sticking with me. To my reviewers you have my heartfelt thanks as well. I started writing this for me, but it is inspiring to know others are enjoying it as well. I still have a long way to go and with the new DLC coming out in a few weeks I might have even longer. It depends on how long it takes for me to get to the end. **

**Raven **


	26. Chapter 26

Leo knew the longer they stayed together, the harder it would be to leave her. Every time the subject came up they would both dance around it. Neither of them wanting to face the prospect of not having the other around. It was killing him to know he would have to leave. Some nights he stayed awake just to watch her sleep taking in ever detail of her sleeping face. Everything about her was pleasing to him. Her voice, her looks, even the way she smelled drove him crazy. He had almost told her he loved her after their last lovemaking, but caught himself. Now he was again staring at her as she slept, praying he could get a sign to tell him what he should do.

"Your still awake? Didn't I wear you out?" Her voice made him jump as her eyes opened to meet his.

"Just thinking Dove, go back to sleep."

"This is the third night in a row you have been staring at me while I sleep. What's on your mind?" He gave her a look like a guilty child whose hand was found in a cookie jar.

"Can't a guy enjoy watching a very cute girl sleep?"

"They can, but you seem to have something on your mind." Leigh sat up, leaning herself against him and sighed. His arms wrapped around her shoulders.

"I do. Dove I..."

"I know you have to leave soon. It has been a miracle that they haven't found us yet, but the longer you stay in one place the easier it will be to find you."

"Dove, I...I don't want to leave, but I have to."

"I know." Leo cupped her chin before bending down the few inches to kiss her. "We will need to leave in a few days. I think Gwaren is about a week away. It might be less."

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"Leaving you behind. Hurting you."

"I knew going in to this you couldn't stay."

"Still, you deserve better than this. I will be forever grateful for what you have done for me."

"It was the right thing to do. We mages have to stick together."

"Yes we do." The sounds of the birds beginning to chirp signaled the sun was coming up. Leo grimaced at the approaching dawn. Time was running out for they and it was killing him. "So what is on the agenda today my dear?" Leigh yawned and stretched in his embrace.

"I guess it would be making sure you have a well stocked pack for your journey. Which means I better get up and go hunting." His arms tightened around her not letting her get out of bed. "Leo your not helping."

"You know if I had a silver for every time someone said that to me I would be richer than the king."

"Then you could buy me a pretty dress with cute little shoes. We would show up every noble in Denerim."

"Dove, you put Andraste to shame. She was a looker, but you my dear lady are angelic."

"I am no angel."

"No? Huh, could have fooled me."

"Your insane."

"Ouch, that hurt Dove." Leigh giggled and kissed his nose.

"There I kissed it and made it better."

"I swear woman your asking for it."

"You do remember what I did to those Templars right?"

"Point taken, alright you win I will get out of bed, but it is under heavy protest. So if you are going hunting what am I to do?"

"You are to make yourself some potions. I got you some herbs that you will need."

"Well, I better get cracking then and you my dear better get dressed."

"Am I tempting you?" Leigh stood up and wiggled her hips in front of him. His hands gripped her and pulled her back down in the bed. "I will take that as a yes. I think we have a little bit before I really have to go out and hunt."

"Hmm, I like that way of thinking. I still have a few things to teach you as I promised."

"Then teach away."

OoO

The smell of elfroot boiling reminded Leigh of home. She sat outside the cabin cleaning the fish she had speared for dinner while Leo was inside brewing potions. As she sat there her mind wandered to thoughts of her family. Her father was likely going insane with worry especially when he found out she had left her amulet behind. She was not looking forward to the dress down she would get from him when she got home. Pash would most likely do the same. The time she had spent with Leo she would not have given up for the world, but she missed her family. Leigh had run ever type of scenario in her mind to keep him with her. Every one of them were crazy at best. She knew in her head Leo couldn't stay, but her heart wanted to hold on. She sighed and continued to scale the fish trying not to think about it. She didn't want him to know she had fallen in love with him. It would only make it worse.

Leo stared into the fire under the pot he had his potion brewing in. He loved the way the flames danced and crackled. It was memorizing. The more he stared the more he could see shapes in the flames. Fire was always his weakest spell. He could conjure enough to make a weak fire ball or light a hearth if needed. It had always fascinated him though ever since he had seen the spirit that blessed him in the Fade. She had a flaming longsword that now reminds him of Templars. Part of him wondered if she had been Andraste herself, but that thought was ludicrous. What would the Bride of \he Maker want with him? Why would she protect him and keep protecting him these past eleven years? Now he sits here with another woman protecting him and instead of wanting to run, he wanted to stay.

Leigh finished up with the fish and readied herself to cook dinner. As she turned to go into the cabin a cold shiver went down her spine. She knew this feeling well. It meant Templars were near. She cursed loudly bring Leo out of the cabin.

"Did you cut yourself?"

"We have a big problem."

"What?"

"Templars are coming."

"Are...are you sure?"

"I wish I wasn't." Leigh felt they were too close for them to make a run for it. "Their too close, if we try to run they'll see us."

"Then you run and I will stay here."

"I am not letting you become a bloody martyr for me, thank you very much." Leigh ran to her pack and took out two small vials. One she thrust into his hand the other she kept. "Drink it!"

"What is it?"

"Magebane."

"But that..."

"Dampens mana, I know. I have plan to get us out of this so they will move on, but you have to drink that and play along. I promised you I wouldn't let them take you and I don't plan on going back on that promise. Now drink!" He tipped back the vial and gagged. He had never tasted anything so vile in his life. He took a small comfort hearing her choke on it as well. "Maker, that's nasty."

"So what is the plan Dove?" She smiled and led him to the bed. "Uh, not that I would ever not want to be in bed with you, but now is not the time."

"Your getting in bed, cover over and act sick."

"This is not going to work. They'll want to check on me you know."

"Not if you have something they don't want to catch. My father is a healer remember, I know a lot of different illnesses to say you have. Leo trust me." Her hand squeezed his tight.

"I do Dove. I just pray you have a silver tongue to talk us out of this. I don't want them to get you."

"They won't get either of us. I won't let them." Leo saw the red glow come back to her eyes like it did the first time he met her. Fear at the time stopped him from asking why her eyes glowed. He promised himself that if they get out of this he would ask her, even if meant hearing she possessed by a demon.

"You better stop your eyes from glowing or it will be a dead giveaway Dove." No sooner had the glow appeared it was gone just as quickly. She tucked him into bed and went out to meet the Templars alone. "_Maker please let this work. I don't want those bastards to get her."_

OoO

The force that greeted Leigh made her wish they had run. She counted at least ten Templars and there were two mages with them. A older man and woman both who looked very worried. She heard Shade paw at the ground and snort. A small hysterical giggle escaped her lips and she prayed they did not hear that. The lead Templar dismounted from his horse and took off his helmet. He too was a older man, maybe a bit older than her father. His eyes were far kinder than she expected. Now more than ever Leigh wanted to have Pash here with her. She was much more diplomatic.

"Evening Gents ow can I elp you?" She saw the older woman wince at her very poor speech. She and the other mage shared a look.

"We are looking for an apostate serah. Have you seen anyone suspicious around here lately or taken in a wayward traveler?"

"Sorry gents it is just me and me man here. We don't take kindly to strangers." Leigh kept her body relaxed even though inside she was scared stiff. She noticed on of the Templars poking around where she had Shade corralled. "Hey, getta way from me horse! She don't like anyone but us."

"May we check your home to make sure this man is not hiding here?"

"I would love to oblige gents, but me man he is sick. He has the pox and is with fever." The older woman stepped forward and smiled at Leigh.

"My name is Wynne and I am a healer. I could help your husband if you like."

"You a mage?"

"Yes I am, I am a senior enchanter for the Circle."

"Me man don't like mages. He says they are evil and control minds." Wynne gave a small chuckle as did the male mage. "Whats so funny?"

"Only blood mages can control minds my dear. We mean you and your husband no harm." Leigh eyed the woman suspiciously trying to keep up the act. All she wanted was for them to go away. The lead Templar tried to push passed her, but Leigh did not budge.

"You lot better leave now!" Two of the Templars tried to grab a hold her and Leigh drew her blades. "Ow dare you! Come to me ouse and try to muscle your way in!" Her voice was a high shriek. The lead Templar held up his hand for his men to stop.

"Serah, we have not come here to upset you, just to find the apostate. The way you are acting tells me you are hiding something Now we can do this the easy way or the hard way. If you would let Wynne take a look at your husband it would ease our suspicion."

"Fine, but only er, you lot stays out."

"Wynne this is up to you."

"I don't think it should be a problem Knight Commander Greagoir. Lead the way my dear." Leigh stepped aside enough to let Wynne go through the door, but slammed it behind her after she slipped into it. Wynne placed a hand on Leigh's shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Is that him in the bed?"

"Please wait." Leigh whispered just loud enough for Wynne to hear her.

"What is it child?" To her credit Wynne also kept her voice low.

"I...can't let them take him back, they'll kill him."

"The First Enchanter and I are here to see that doesn't happen. He needs to turn himself in." Leo stirred in the bed and sat up.

"You two can't protect me forever Wynne and you know full well what they will do to her for helping me. I won't let them hurt her." The look on his face caught the older mage off guard. She watched him wrap his arms around the young girl protectively and it broke her heart. He had broken the first rule of being a Circle mage, never fall in love. Wynne sighed and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Young man you are more trouble than you are worth at times. This young woman means this much to you?"

"And more. She saved me from Rolan and his cronies. They wanted to rape me Wynne, just to prove they could get away with it. Just like they got away with hurting Ori. You know what they did, you were the one who had to help me heal her. It's a miracle she is still alive and sane."

And..."

"No Wynne, I would rather die then go back to that. It's not right what they are allowed to do to us."

"Please help us." Leigh grasped Wynne's hands and her eyes pleaded with her for help. "I saw what they were going to do to him, I couldn't sit by and let it happen. Mages are not monsters, but they are feared."

"And you don't fear us then?"

"No, I never have. My cousin is a mage in Kinloch Hold. How am I to fear my own kin?"

"You are a rare one indeed my dear. And what of you, you know they will never give up looking for you?"

"Sooner or later they might catch me, but she will not pay for it now. Please Wynne, help me protect her."

"Maker's grace, yes I will help you for now, but I will warn you they know you were heading to Gwaren. If you go there they will find you and there will be no helping either of you then. Now I better use some magic to heal your pox or they will think something is amiss. Lay back down and cover yourself up."

"There is a special place beside the Maker deemed for you Wynne. You deserve nothing less."

"Remember that if I even have to teach you again. Maybe you won't give me such a hard time."

"Deal." Leigh stood back and watched Wynne weave a healing spell over his body, but saw it never touched him. She admired the control this woman had. Her father had the same control. All her life she wanted nothing more than to have the skill of healing like her father, her sister, but she was a destroyer not a healer. She was a fighter, a sneak and would always be that way.

"Well my dear girl that is all I can do for him. He will have to stay in bed for a least another week or so. Here are two droughts you can make for him with the plants found around here. He needs them both twice a day." Wynne raised her voice so the Templars outside could hear her. "I will take my leave now." Wynne gave Leigh a sympathetic smile and went out the door. "It is as she said her husband has the pox. If I were you Greagoir I would not send anyone in there. The pox is very catching."

"How is it you won't get it then?" Wynne narrowed her eyes at Rolan.

"I can protect myself from it as a healer, but I can not do the same for the rest of you. We should move on before night fall and find a place to camp."

"Too bad we can't use this place, would serve the bitch right for back talking us." Rolan did not see the gauntlet til it connected with his jaw. Through tear stung eyes he looked up at Greagoir standing over him in a fit of rage.

"It is because of Templars like you Rolen we are not trusted. We serve the people not the other way around. What we are does not give us the right to take what we want. You better learn that soon or Maker help you I will hang you myself. Now wipe off your face and saddle up." The young Templar glared, but did as he was told. Irving caught up with Wynne and bowed his head to her ear.

"He is in there, isn't he?"

"No, just a very young couple trying survive out in the cruel world Irving. Anders is not here nor do I think he ever was. I think Rolen is so blinded by what happened to him he will lash out at anyone."

"But nothing really happened to him other being bitten up by a few bugs. From the story they told this mage could have done so much worse. Though in hindsight there is no mage that strong that can face down a group of Templars. Even Templars who are very green."

"Rolan is just a angry young man Irving. I doubt he wanted to be a Templar in the first place. Anders better hope he is never caught by that one." Irving nodded and went to go speak with Greagoir.

"What now Knight Commander?"

"We head to Gwaren as planned. The only other ports he could have gone to are Denerim or Amiranthine. Denerim has the main Chantry and an army of Templars. Anders is not so foolish to head into the lion's den or to a place that has a larger Chantry like Amiranthine."

"What of the story the men told us? About the woman mage helping him?"

"Irving if there was such a mage living in Thedas today then Maker help us. Someone that strong in magic could do a lot of damage. But it is a fairy tale made up by Templars who were embarrassed by a lone mage nothing more. We should move on before that girl gets it in her mind to chase us out of here. She did not look pleased at all."

"No she didn't." Leigh watched out the window of the cabin to see that they were moving on. Her heart was threatening to beat itself right out of her chest. She couldn't believe it had worked, well sort of. If it had not been for Wynne it would have turned ugly. Even with taking the magebane her mana was still there. She could feel it in her blood. She wondered how the Templars could not, but for that she was grateful. She could hear Leo shuffle up behind her. His warm arms wrapped her up as his chin rested on her shoulder. Neither of them spoke for a long time. Reality it felt had just kicked them in the teeth hard. With a small shutter Leigh turned and buried her head in his chest trying desperately to fight off the tears that were coming. All he could do was smooth her hair and hold her.

OoO

Leo stood there mesmerized watching her fight. They had run into a small pack of bandits on their way to Denerim. With Gwaren being guarded by Templars on the look out for him, they decided to go to the ports in Denerim. The bandits did not stand much of a chance between the two of them. Leigh dodged one of the bandits by disappearing in a cloud of smoke only to appear right behind the man. Leo heard a loud crack as her dagger hilt connected with the back of the man's skull. Neither wanted to really kill the men this close to the city.

"I think that was the last of them." Leo smiled at her and started to walk in her direction. He noticed her eyes narrowed at him and he stopped dead. "Dove?" She snarled as she ran at him both daggers bared. She moved to fast for him to block her attack with his magic. He had just enough time to put his arms up to defend his face and chest. All he felt was a breeze as she sailed by him to bury her dagger into the rogue that was sneaking up behind him.

"You will not touch him!" The wet sound of flesh being pierced and twisted made Leo cringe. He opened his eyes to see where they had landed. Her momentum forced the rogue back a good ten feet from where Leo had been standing. Leigh got to her feet only to fall to her knees again. "L...Leo..." She turned her torso just enough for him to see the rogue's dagger sticking out of her shoulder.

"Shit, hold still." He slide next to her hands already glowing with healing magic. "This is going to hurt Dove, but I have to pull it out."

"I know how much you hate doing that." He looked at her with both eyebrows raise and laughed despite himself.

"Only you would make a joke like that now. I doubt this dagger feels good in your shoulder."

"No, no it doesn't, but better my shoulder than your lung or throat. I can't heal remember."

"So you knew you would get stabbed?"

"Not really, but I knew if I did you would be here to save me." Leigh hissed as the dagger slid out of her shoulder. The warm feeling of healing magic washed over her sealing the wound.

"You're insane. Your life is worth more than mine."

"Your life is worth something to me Leo."

"Your the only one who thinks so." Leigh cupped his chin and leaned in to a kiss. "Ever since I found out I was a mage I have been called freak, worthless, evil, but you Dove have never looked at me that way. It means more to me than you ever know that you care about me, that you love me." She opened her mouth to speak, but he gently shushed her. "I know you do, so don't deny it. Only someone that loves would do what you have done for me. I wish I could...Maker I hate this. I can't..." It was her turn to silence him.

"I don't need to hear the words Leo. I know you can't. I understand."

"Someday you will make some man very happy Dove. I will envy him til the day I die, because I know it will never be me. I will be that secret smile you have that he will never know."

"A woman's heart is deeper than the ocean, no one knows what is buried beneath the waves. We...we better get you to a ship." He nodded solemnly and helped her off the ground.

Denerim was bustling, making it easy for them to blend in to the crowds. Leigh left him hiding in the shadows by some shop or another so she could go scout out where the docks were. When she finally came back to him the look on her face made his heart drop to his toes.

"The Templars are here!" Her voice came out a harsh hiss.

"The main Chantry is here Dove, so it would dictate that Templars would be here." She shook her head violently and pointed to the square. Leo cursed and punched the side of the building. There in the square was the Templars that they had fooled just a week earlier. Wynne and Irving were with them. Leo saw Rolan scanning the crowd, sour face as ever. "They know I'm here. Maker I thought they were going to Gwaren."

"I was able to get close enough to overhear them. They received information stating you were headed here. Some woman saw us and contacted them to recapture you. We need to go now and try to head to Gwaren or back to the Wilds just til I can think of someway to stop them." The Witch's words echoed in his head. He had to let her go, he had to save her from a life in a cage.

"Dove, it's over their too close for us to run. I...I want you to go home."

"No! I am not leaving you, we can..."

"If you love me you will go."

"Please don't ask me to do this. I won't. I know I promised not to become a clingy lover, but I lied. I promised I would not let them take you away, I keep my promises." Both his hands cupped her cheeks so he could stare into her eyes. His thumbs trailed under her eyes wiping her tears away. "Leo, no...please..."

"I have to. You need to stay free. If they take you Dove, they will kill you and at that point I won't want to live. If I go quietly they won't hurt me. Please Dove, don't try to stop me and don't attack them." Leigh threw her arms around his neck so she could crash her lips against his. She kissed him with all the passion and desperation she was feeling. Leo kissed her back with just as much fervor before breaking the kiss. His forehead touched hers, his fingers entwined in hers trying to gather the strength to leave her.

"I love you. You will always have my heart."

"Don't close yourself off to love just for me. I want you to be happy always." In a fast movement she took her hands from his and unclasped one of her earrings. Leigh took a pin out of her pouch and quickly stabbed it through his ear. Once she had the guide hole Leigh re-clasped the earring on his ear. She had been so quick about it Leo barely felt any pain.

"Think of me."

"Always Mo Anam Cara." Before she could ask him what that meant he was gone. She watched him cross the square right to the Templars. She felt them use their mana drain on him and her teeth clenched. She wanted to rain fire down on them all, but knew she couldn't. All she could do was witness them taking him away and she knew this would be the last memory of him she would ever have. Heartbroken and defeated Leigh snuck out of the city and went to gather Shade for the long, lonely journey home.

OoO

It could have been worse he guessed. A month in solitary confinement was better than getting flogged or worse made Tranquil. Anders' head turned to the door when he heard the familiar click of the key in the door. He was expecting the guard to just throw his food at him like always, but the person in front of him was a surprise.

"To what do I owe this honor Wynne?"

"I wanted to make sure you were alright. I know the last time the put you in here you...

"Went stark raving mad, I'm fine. It hasn't been that bad this time around. I have Mr. Wiggums for company and my memories." Wynne settled herself on the floor next to him and wrapped her arm around his shoulders.

"I know you loved her Anders. You did the most unselfish thing by letting her go and turning yourself in."

"Mark it down on the history books, Anders isn't the colossal prig everyone thought he was."

"Do you know when I was younger I hated being here. I wanted nothing more than freedom. When I found out I was with child I wanted that freedom even more, but I never had the courage to run."

"You had a child?"

"Yes, my dear I did and the Chantry took him from me. I always wondered had I been braver would I have been able to keep him."

"Do you know what happened to him?"

"Irving, Maker bless him, told me he was sent to another Circle when it was found out he was a mage. I don't know which Circle, but I have faith he is safe and well."

"I hope so."

"One day Anders I hope you stop running and except the path the Maker has given you. It is far easier when you stop struggling."

"Maybe one day, but I doubt it Wynne. At least I will be out of here by my name day."

"The Hallow right?"

"Yes, it is another thing she and I share. We where both born on the Hallow."

"It is a blessed day to be born. I will try to find a way to sneak your friends down here to see you. Orianne was beside herself with worry over you."

"Has...have they been leaving her alone?"

"Yes, once Greagior found out what happened he sent Addler away to Denerim and Rolan is also leaving."

"Why?"

"He had a nice little row with the Knight Commander and struck him."

"Rolan never was much on brains. At least those two will be gone when I get out of here. Thank the Maker for small miracles. Tell Ori and the rest I am alive and well and will see them in a months time."

"I will, I know you hate being here Anders, but I for one am glad you are back."

"Thanks Wynne, for everything." The older woman smiled and left him to his punishment. The Templars could steal his freedom, his pride, but not his memories. The earring his Dove had put in his ear had healed and was a reminder to him of what he lost. He vowed to never let his heart feel anything other than friendship ever again. Anders let himself drift off thinking of her and hoping she was safe and happy.

OoO

It had been almost a month since Leigh had seen home. She stood at the edge of the woods and stared at her family's cozy little cottage. Her heart still felt like it was still ripped in two, but she was glad to be home. She turned around to talk to the woman at her back.

"Well there it is. Home sweet home."

"Then I shall leave you to go see your family again."

"Thank you for helping me get back. I guess I better come up with a story on why I am returning short a horse."

"Tell them that I ran off during a storm."

"Well that would be the truth wouldn't it. You did run off during those storms. What I don't understand is why did you shapeshift into a horse and stay here all that time?"

"I was curious about you and your family. It is hard to hide one apostate let alone three. Now my curiosity has been sated and I must return home."

"Shade?"

"Yes, Leigh?"

"Do you think I will ever see him again?"

"The future is unknown, but I think so. The true test will be will you want to when the time comes. Will he be the man you knew or will he be someone you will end up hating?"

"I will never hate him."

"Time will tell. Take care of yourself Hawke. You have a hard life in front of you, but I think we will meet again."

"Maker watch over you Shade."

"Keep your Maker, but I do appreciate the thought. Go...your family has missed you." Leigh watched the woman shape into a wolf and take off into the dark of the forest. After she was sure Shade was gone she headed toward home. She heard her family in the house talking about her. Carver's voice was the loudest only offset by the sound of a chair slamming to the floor and the door swinging open . Leigh stopped like a spooked deer and watched her brother stare into the moonlight. His fists were clenched and she swore she could see tears running down his face.

"Carver...come back. You can't go after her if you don't know where she went son."

"She should have been back by now! I swear if those Templars have her I will go to the blighted Tower myself and gut every single one of them!"

"Carver I didn't know you cared." Both men spun around to find Leigh standing near the old oak tree in front of the house. Malcolm reached her first pulling her into a bear hug that squashed all the air out of her lungs, but Leigh didn't care. She was so happy to be home. When her father finally put her down she was accosted by the rest of her family. Bethany and Leandra had heard the commotion outside and came out to see what was going on. Bethany squealed and slammed into her sister knocking them both over.

"Oh darling your home, your home. We were so worried."

"I'm fine Mama."

"What of the boy?" Leigh closed her eyes and shook her head sadly. Her father did not press the matter any further for now.

"What happened to your demon horse sister?"

"She ran away during a storm. We looked for her for days, but we couldn't find her. I'm sorry Papa."

"Leigh you are much more important than some silly horse. I'm glad you are safe."

"He saw to that. He let the Templars capture him so that I could get away. He said he did not want me to pay the price of helping a runaway Circle mage."

"Then he showed honor and courage that is not seen much in mages."

"I have seen it everyday of my life Papa, I see it in you. I...I'm tired."

"Let's get you in the house and to bed then. Tomorrow we can talk more about your adventure." Carver helped Leigh to her feet as well as his twin before slipping Leigh amulet over her head.

"You left this behind." Leigh felt the mana in her blood quiet almost immediately and Pash's voice sounding in her head again. It was both comforting and depressing. She enjoyed being herself for once in her life without fear or doubt.

"Thanks Carver. I've felt naked without this."

"See you don't forget it again sister. It is very important." Leigh raised a questioning eyebrow at her brother and he just smiled. "It is a family heirloom isn't it?"

"Yes. Malcolm cleared his throat and urged his family inside the house. Leigh spent the night listening to Pash lecture her of how much danger she was in, but she didn't care. After a while she fell fast asleep and dreamed of Leo. She prayed to the Maker he was alive and as safe as he could be in Kinloch Hold. Her heart felt empty and withered. Part of her was missing and always would be. She knew it would get better as time rolled on, but the hole would always be there. She would always ache for a man she could never be with again.

OoO

Anders stood in Vigil's Keep watching the next batch of poor slobs to take the Joining. Part of him prayed two of them would choke on the blood and die, but he was never that lucky. The Chantry had sent Rolan and Addler to join the Wardens. Ashlyn had returned to the palace and this new Commander was a simpering fool. Even Nathaniel was gone for now at least. Ogrhen and Sigrun were still around, but he did not feel close to them like he did to Nathaniel or Ashlyn. Velanna had made a short return to her clan to bury her sister. They had found her body right before Ashlyn had taken her leave. Justice was still around, but his body was failing. It was getting harder and harder to be around him because of the stench. It hurt Anders to see his friend suffer so much. He had tried researching how to send Justice back to the Fade, but came up with no answers save one. He had to bond with a living, willing host. Then and only then would he be able to return to the Fade once that host dies. Now came the tricky part finding someone willing to carry around extra baggage for a while. Not much hope in that from what he could see.

"These four have survived the Joining. Will the rest of you please take them to their new rooms til they wake."

"Lazy sod, why doesn't he carry them there? Their his bloody men not ours."

"My Anders you are in a right foul mood today." Sigrun took the other end of Rolan to help Anders move him.

"I know both of these blighted Templars and I know why they are here. I swear I will run again before I let them lay a hand on me."

"But they are Wardens now. If they try to hurt you they forfeit their lives."

"Do you really think that bloated bag of wind up there cares two bits for us Sig? He hates us. He is bitter because we aren't loyal to him."

"Well he really hasn't done anything to get our loyalty either. I miss Raven."

"Me too, more now than ever. She would put these two bastards in their place. Truthfully if she or Nate was here, these two would not be."

"Very true. Raven hated being told who to take as a Warden. I have never met anyone who could judge character like she can."

"Raven is a rare woman indeed. Ah here we go this is their room. I am tempted to just throw them in here and lock the door, but my luck they'll like it."

"Well they can sleep in their armor for all I care. Let's go get his friend and be done with this. I promised Ogrhen I would spare with him later."

"I think I am going to go visit Justice down in the cellar. It is a sin the way they are treating him. It's not his fault that Kristoff's body is a little ripe."

"Just do yourself a favor and dab some menthol oil under your nose. It helps with the smell."

"Thanks, alright two assholes in one room. Check. I would say our work here is done Sig."

"If they give you a hard time Oggie and I will back them off. Hopefully Nate and Vel will be back within the month and it will be us against them."

"I hope so. I have a really bad feeling about them being here. You better go and find Ogrhen before he gets too drunk to fight. I'll be alright."

"See you at dinner then." Anders turned and looked at the still forms of the men who had made his life a living nightmare for a time. Now they were here to plague him again. The only comfort he could take was at least Orianne would never have to deal with their cruelty again. They would also find he was not the same weak mage they had seen the last time. Now Anders was much stronger and had learned to fight with or without his magic. A staff still was no match for a great sword, but the bastards would have to catch him first to hurt him. He was grateful for Ashlyn's training and her friendship for those few short months. He let out a sigh and shut the door. The urge to run again was there all to sharp in his mind. He thought maybe talking to Justice would quell some of his fears. His fingers mindlessly played with the one earring he had worn for years now. After hearing that almost the entire south of Ferelden was destroyed his heart sank. It hurt even more to know his Dove was most likely dead or worse and he shuttered at the thought of her being a broodmother. He shook off all thought of her as he descended the stairs to see how Justice was fairing. Even in his weakened and decaying state he was a force to be reckoned with. Anders had learned early to stay by the stronger fighters. It made people think twice on attacking you.

"Ah Anders it is nice of you to visit." The sight of Justice made Anders cringe on the inside. His decay was progressing far faster than he had thought. The flesh in some places was gone leaving only bone and rot behind.

"How's life treating you down here in the crypt Justice?"

"The damp earth is furthering this body's decay. It will not be long before I am just bone."

"I'm sorry my friend. I know this is not easy for you. I wish..."

"You wish what?" The milky dead eyes bore into Anders. He could not take seeing any especially a friend suffer like this. Something in him screamed to just be a man and tell him you have a way out for him. Tell him you are done being a selfish coward.

"No I don't wish, Justice I found a way for you to return to the Fade."

"How?"

"You have to join with a willing host and when that body dies you and the host's spirits return to the Fade."

"Who would do such a joining? It is not a small task the host would take on, nor I for that matter."

"I...I would. With the taint in my blood I have thirty years tops left to live."

"You would do this for me?"

"Yes, I would. Your my friend Justice I want to help you. I know you must be in constant pain in that body. At least in mine you won't have to feel yourself decay."

"There must something I could do to repay you for this kindness?"

"The only thing I want Justice is to be free and I have that already. Well I would love to get me cat back as well, but that can wait."

"What of the other mages still held under Chantry rule? Could we not find a way to help them be free?" Anders remembered the long running conversations he had with Justice over the plight of mages in Thedas. The spirit had all but belittled him for not helping his fellow mages be free. It had always seemed to much work to fight a war you were never going to win. If he had his Dove at his side again maybe they could win it, but tht was a fool's dream. She was gone and he for the moment was free and relatively safe. At least until Rolan and Addler woke up. He answered in the only way he could to stop Justice from harping on him again.

"I guess we could, but change does not come overnight Justice it could take years, decades, even centuries before that happens. You and I will be long gone."

"True, but it is an idea."

"Give me a few days to track down the ingredients I need to make the transfer over to my body. We won't be able to do it here, not with the Chantry dogs that have joined our ranks."

"This new Commander is incompetent. Raven would never have allowed it."

"Neither would have Nate. I will be back in a few days then we can go over this together."

"I will be waiting til then." Anders took his leave not knowing the path he had chosen would change him forever. Gone would be the carefree selfish man he once was and in his place would be a man driven by hate and fear. Justice would be his only friend after that. No one would want a spirit possessed man in their lives. He resigned himself to be alone, but life sometimes comes around full circle. What was lost can sometimes be found again. Even if you don't want it to life has a way of showing us what we need. He found it that day Leigh walked into his clinic and asked for the maps of the Deep Roads he had. Time had changed them both, but fate had still destined them to be together, at least for now.


	27. Chapter 27

It seemed like she had slept for weeks. Leigh's arms and legs felt like they were weighted down by stone blocks. She tried in vain to to shift herself so she could sit up and shake her dreams off. The memories of Leo ripped open a wound she had thought long healed since she had been with Anders. The brush of fingers on her cheek made her open her eyes. Cold gray met warm amber brown and she couldn't help but smile. In this moment she could see the ghost of the man she loves staring back at her. It made her forget what they were doing, where they were going. It made her forget the pain that every loss she had endured in her life. Here she was safe, in his arms the world went away. She knew he felt the same way just by the light in his eyes when he looked at her.

"Morning."

"Morning. Are the others up yet?" He rolled his head to look over his shoulder, then back to her.

"No, looks like other than Varric the rest look like they are still sleeping."

"It feels like I have been sleeping for a month."

"Hmm, sorry love not that long. Only half a day at best. Are you feeling alright. I will tell them you need more time..."

"No, I'm alright. I want this over and after that I...I want to go home."

"I'm sure Bohdan, Sandal and Orana have kept the home fires burning and hopefully Aveline has come to take Tovis out to the barracks so we don't return to a wrecked room."

"No Anders I want to go home...to Ferelden. I'm tired of fighting everything here. I don't have it in me anymore. I want to just live without having to fight the next idiot who wants a shot at the title Champion of Kirkwall. I want you and I to just...be."

"Leigh I..."

"Please, just let it go. This war against the Templars is killing you and us. I'm tired of my life being shredded piece by piece til there is nothing left but scattered tatters left behind."

"Al...alright we'll leave. We will take the ship with Bethany and Cullen. If this is what you truly want."

"It is. I want to grow old with you and not have to keep fighting. I fear one day there will be a fight that I can't win and..." Guilt slowly started to build in his stomach. He still had yet to tell her he would never grow old. He would be dead long before that due to the taint in his blood.

"You lose your life or worse someone you love."

"Exactly." From behind his back Anders heard the others stir. He closed his eyes and sighed knowing they would be on the move again soon. He opened his mouth to say something, but the loud sound of armor clanking stopped him. Leigh sat up and saw the warrior hastily throwing on his armor before anyone see him out of it. She heard him curse loudly when the breast plate hit the ground and his helmet rolled in her direction. The warrior froze with his back turned to Anders and Leigh. It was still quite dark out with sunrise at least at hour away so all Leigh could see was a large shadow. Anders on the other hand could see the side of the man's face. The warrior had a nasty scar running down his cheek and neck. His arm was also pretty scarred. Anders remembered Orianne telling him her husband had been hurt by an ogre while running from Ostagar.

"Could one of you roll my helmet back over here please?" Leigh rolled off the bed roll to pick up helmet only to have Anders beat her to it.

"I got it love, rest a while longer." The warrior stiffened when he realized Anders was standing next to him handing him the helmet. "Here you go."

"Uh, thanks. I'm normally not this clumsy."

"Lack of sleep will do that to you. Your lucky you know, most people don't survive an ogre attack."/

"The ogre fared much worse than I did. At least that is what I was told. I was in no shape to see it at the time."

"I've only known a hand full of people who can kill a ogre by themselves. The Warden Commander being one of them."

"I saw her fight in the battle for Denerim. I was up on Fort Drakon fighting with the Arl's men. She is either crazy or Maker blessed."

"A little of both. I hope you know how lucky you are to have Ori. She is an amazing woman."

"Your not telling me anything I don't know magey."

"Why do people insist on calling mages that?"

"Isn't that what you are?"

"I'm a mage not a magey."

"Your lucky I don't call you worse than that. I am here to make sure the Champion makes it back to Kirkwall in one piece. I'm not here to coddle apostates."

"And here I thought we were getting along so well. Your a hypocrite, married to a mage, but hate her people."

"I don't hate her people I just don't like you. Your trouble."

"And how in the name of the Void do you know that?"

"The funny thing about being a big dumb fighter is people tend to talk around you when they think you aren't listening. I heard what you did in Ferelden and I'll tell you this, if I think you are a danger I will put you down."

"You should have been a Templar." Justice did not take kindly to the warrior's threat. He pushed forward in Anders' mind and the blue glow started to show in his eyes. "You would do best not threaten me boy." The warrior back away a step or two and went to reach for his sword. That was all Justice had to see to completely take over. In a flash the quiet camp turned into chaos. Bethany and Cullen grabbed Ori and ran for cover. Varric got between the two men and leveled Bianca at Anders.

"Alright Blondie play time is over. We are all friends here so Justice can get put away."

'By the Void what is he?"

"Enough!" Everyone turned to see Leigh with her hands wreathed in flames. The red cracks on her skin paled only to the red burning glow of her eyes. She stalked forward and grabbed Anders by the arm. "Your anger is not helping."

"I..."

"Varric you can put Bianca down. Justice will not be doing anything."

"Uh...if you say so...Junior if I were you I would get your armor on and go for a walk for a few minutes til she can calm him down."

"Holy Maker, Anders what is...did you make a deal with a demon?"

"Shit, wrong choice of words, everyone take cover." Varric pushed them all to the other side of the stone wall that lined the road,while Leigh or more properly Pash stayed out to deal with Justice. "I had to make friends with possessed mages didn't I?"

"Your not the one related to one of them Varric, So I don't want to hear it."

"Sorry Sunshine, look on the bright side at least your sister's plus one is more stable than Anders."

"Is that suppose to make me feel better?"

"No, I guess not." All sets of eyes peered over the wall to watch the two spirits.

"He threatened us." Pash sighed and rubbed the bridge of Leigh's nose.

"I heard what he said and it was a warning nothing more. The warrior will do what he has to to protect his wife Justice."

"He is no better than the Templars."

"You are letting Anders fears and anger cloud your judgment, brother."

"My judgment is not clouded!"

"You are losing yourself to vengeance. This is not the spirit I know, the one who has stood beside me in the Fade for more time than can be counted. The one I trust above all others. Justice please, I do not want to have to make you sleep again."

"You treat me like a child." His anger had cooled enough that his voice was not booming. "How are you not corrupted by your host?"

"She did not have the life yours has. She never learned the evils of mortals the way Anders has. His life has not been easy brother, I know that, but he is safe now as are you. Attacking your allies is not the way. You are proving to these mortals that all spirits of the Fade can be swayed. You are better than this." Pash took a few steps forward and took his hands. "I do not want you to become like the others who have fallen from grace. I care for you too much to see that happen."

"I am sorry sister, I...we never wanted this."

"Neither did Leigh and I, but what is, is. All we can do is stay true to who we are and help when we can. You do him not justice by ruling his life."

"I...yes sister." The blue glow ceased immediately letting Anders take back control. His body tipped forward into Pash and when he looked up at her she gave him a sad smile.

"It is getting harder to stop him. Maker, I can't keep doing this."

"We will not let you fall to Vengeance, Anders."

"How? It seems that everything that is said to me sets him off. He does not recognize who is friend and who is foe anymore."

"He had pushed you too hard and has unknowingly broken your will, making it easier to take control. You are a strong man Anders, but the path you walk is taking it's toll."

"I have to help my fellow mages."

"We will help them, together. You cannot shut her out of this fight anymore. She was destined for this."

"She can't."

"You have to let her decide that. She would walk through fire for you and with you. You are not alone in this anymore. You have help."

"It will get her killed."

"Her choice, she is a protector, a leader, but even she needs a safe harbor. You are that for her and always have been. What she will face soon could break her. She needs you."

"I need her too." Pash looked over his shoulder and saw the others watching from behind the wall. She turned to them and gave a warm smile.

"Thank you Varric for your quick thinking."

"Lady I am just glad you can control Mr. Grumpy when he comes out. How can you do that by the way?"

"As I told you before Mercy stays the hand of Justice. He is an older spirit, but I am stronger in some ways." Bethany slowly climbed over the wall never taking her eyes off Pash. The red glow from her was warm even her eyes were soft despite the red glow. "Hello Bethany."

"Your the spirit of compassion that my sister spoke of." Pash nodded and took Bethany's hand. "I...you saved her life. I can never thank you enough for that."

"You don't have to. Your sister is very special to me."

"She is pretty special to all of us too."

"I know. I can feel it from all of you."

"You okay Blondie?"

"Been better."

"Hey look at it this way Broody and Chantry boy could be here."

"Maker Varric!"

"What?"

"Do you want to see a blood bath that badly?"

"No, just said it could be worse." Orianna and her husband finally came over the wall, but kept their distance. "You two alright?"

"We will be as long as that thing stays away from us." The warrior put his now armored body between Anders and his wife. He turned to Cullen seething.

"Your a bloody Templar do your duty and put that thing out of it's misery." Pash placed herself between Anders and the angry man.

"And what of me? I am not different than him. Will you put me out of my misery too?"

"Your nothing like him. He is dangerous." The bell like laughter that escaped Pash's mouth sent shivers down everyone's spine.

"I am far more dangerous than he will ever be." Orianne stepped around her husband lightning in her hand. Her husband grabbed her arm trying to pull her back. Pash held up her hand. "Peace dear woman. I mean no one here any harm, but I will also allow no harm to fall on those I hold dear to me."

"Anders why?"

"He was trapped outside the Fade in a body that was decaying around him. He was a friend during my time with the Wardens. Ori I...he was suffering I couldn't let..."

"So you are like Wynne?"

"Yes, but my anger has changed him. He thought he could temper it, but we were both wrong, so very wrong." Anders could not look at any of them and turned his back. Orianne broke the warrior's grasp and ran to her friend.

"Your such a stupid shit do you know that?"

"I've been called worse."

"What in the name of the Maker am I going to do with you Anders?"

"What?"

"I understand why you did it you ass. I wish you hadn't, but I can see you were trying to do something noble. Could it be the selfish prig I knew has grown up?"

"Never, but I did grow a conscience and most of the time he is not as violent as you just saw."

"I thought Hawke was your conscience Blondie."

"Your not helping Varric."

"I never do. Well the sun looks like it is ready to rise. If we are done with the light show and inquisition we should get on the road."

"How do we know he won't attack us again?"

"I never truly attacked you."

"You...shit let's just get going then so I can get back to Ferelden where it is normal. I swear if you glow again I will..."

"Love, it is better if you don't threaten him again. We don't need the spirit coming out to play again."

"Fine, I'll just be waiting over there trying not to make the mage angry." With the argument resolved Pash let herself sink back into Leigh's mind.

"Welcome back Hawke."

"Thanks Varric. Sorry everyone."

"Nothing to apologize for Hawke, most of us are use to it by now." Leigh smiled and shook her head at her friend. Varric always had a way of making you feel better even when things were going bad. They packed up the rest of the camp in silence and started down the trade road again. Most of the party gave Anders a wide berth after what had almost happened. Only Leigh and Ori walked beside him. The two women busied themselves exchanging stories about Anders and Ferelden. The Carta had not lied about it taking only a day to reach their destination, but no one was prepared for what lie within.

OoO

"Varric I swear your the only dwarf I am ever going to like." The old mining tunnel was crawling with Carta that only had one thing on their mind. Get the blood of the Hawke. Leigh had lost track of how many she had killed so far, but she knew it had to be over twenty and that was just her head count. Her limbs were screaming at her to rest, but their enemies just kept coming. "Maker did they clear out Orzammar to get them all here?"

"Carta are like roaches Hawke. You kill one and ten more take it's place."

"Not inspiring confidence Varric." She sliced the throat of one stupid enough to get close to her and scanned the area. These dwarves had no idea she was a mage since they had killed the one who were to bring her here in the first place. Leigh took a deep breath and ran out into the open. "Hey you stupid nug humpers I right here come and get me!" She signaled to her friend to stay were they were so they did not get caught in the blast she was about to use. _"Come one get a little bit closer, that's right I'm a poor defenseless girl just waiting for you to come and steal my blood." "You have never been defenseless." "I have to make it look that way Pash or they won't come in close enough for me to shock their worthless hides to oblivion." "Good point." "I thought so."_

Anders hands began to twitch watching Leigh stand there alone and surrounded. He hated having to stand on the sidelines while she put her life at risk again. Even though he knew she could take care of herself, it still did not calm his nerves. _"Just blast them already Leigh, this is not a game. Their bloody well close enough for a firestorm."_ He felt the hair on the back of his neck stand straight up and the air filled with the smell of ozone. He grabbed Varric and threw him back around the corner of the wall they were hiding behind. It was not a moment too sooneither as the air filled with a blinding light and dying screams.

"Andraste's flaming ass what did she do?" Orianne cast a shield around herself and peeked around the wall.

"She fried them like bacon. Maker's breath there had to be at least twenty men around her. I've never seen anything like it before." Anders had followed suit and joined Orianne to see what Leigh had done.

"Hmm, she's branching out, her normal thing is fire."

"This is normal?"

"For Leigh, yes for the rest of us mere mortals not so much."

"Anders, stop being well Anders and tell me how in the name of the Maker she is that strong? Is it the spirit that makes her that strong?"

"No that my dear Ori is all her. She is a Somniari."

"They are just myths."

"That's what the Chantry wants us to believe. They are rare, but they do exist." Orianne's gaze went back to were Leigh was standing. Some of the bodies were still twitching while she walked by them to get back to the others. Anders was the only one who went out to meet her half way. "Lightning huh?"

"Just trying it on for size. I thought Justice would like it, it is his favorite attack."

"He is very impressed and the others, well they..."

"Say no more, I get it. They think I am a freak. I guess I should get use to it, even among mages I am different." Anders did not know what to say to her. Nothing he thought of would have quelled her hurt. Leigh sighed and went to the task of searching the bodies for anything useful. She found a staff on the fallen Coterie mage that was with the Carta. "Masterwork, anyone need a new staff or a back up?"

"Don't you use one?" Orianne's eyebrow raised at Leigh.

"Don't need one. I prefer my daggers to fight. I use magic as a last resort." The look on the elven mage's face told Leigh she better explain at least a little bit. "I was trained as a rogue and to use that skill first. Magic was to serve the best in me, not what is base. I think of myself as a rogue who just happens to have magic."

"I just have never seen a mage able to fight without magic. We were never allowed to learn anything other than spells and some defense with our staffs."

"That is the beauty of living free. No one can tell you, you can't learn another way. I even think if my brother had been born a mage he still would have taken up a greatsword and been a warrior. Our father taught us to play to our strengths always. I was the quiet sneaky one, Carver was the strong aggressive one, and Bethany was the kind nurturing one, hence why she is a healer and potions master."

"If mages were taught that way..." Anders clapped his hand on Orianne's shoulder and finished her train of thought for her.

"The Templars would not stand a chance if we decide to fight back." Cullen's eyes met Bethany's and she could tell he was very uncomfortable with the topic of conversation.

"Leigh can we change the subject please for now?" Leigh turned her head and nodded to Cullen. She gave him a understanding smile.

"Not all Templars are cruel. I have known at least three who aren't."

"Who love?"

"Cullen for one. I have known him for most of my life and you will not find a better man. Ser Thrask was also a very kind man and Keran."

"I forgot about him." Varric had taken the initiative to scout while the rest were talking. He found a gate up the stairs from where they were. He kept to the shadows and peered through it. On the other side he saw another group of Carta being barked at by a dwarf in ornate armor. They were setting a trap for them and it looked nasty. Varric grimaced and headed back to the others.

"We have a problem Hawke."

"Other than crazy dwarves out for my blood?"

"They are setting a trap for us. I counted at least another ten men and the leader doesn't look like a push over. Plus they have a battle bronto in there with them."

"Wonderful. Show me." He led her to the gate. The room was two tiered. The lower part had a blade trap, that much Leigh could see. The second tier had Carta armed with crossbows and a few with swords. She could see the leader unpacking a large bundle from the bronto. She could feel magic emanating from what ever it was and her body involuntary shivered. It felt foreign yet familiar. "We need a plan, but first I have to disable those traps."

"Traps are my specialty Hawke. Go get the others ready." She heard his knuckles crack before he disappeared. She and the others stormed into the room taking the Carta by surprise. The warrior and Cullen stood toe to toe with their leader. The rogues and mages took out the rest. "Well that was easier than expected."

"Thanks to you disarming the blade trap." Leigh's eyes fell on the bundle that leader had been handling before and she started to unwrap it. Inside the burlap that it was wrapped in was a sword, a staff and a dagger. Leigh's fingers brushed gently across the dagger and she felt an echo in her head. It was calling to her to pick it up. Without thinking her hand wrapped around the hilt and a pulse of magic surged through her. She did not notice she had cried out til she felt Anders try to pry the dagger out of her hand.

"Leigh let go of it!" The pulse passed along an understanding that it was made for her.

"It's alright love, This...this was...it belonged to my father." Bethany saw the other two weapons and gasped.

"How...how did he know what we would be?"

"I have no idea, but the staff is yours and the sword..." She could not help the tears in her eyes, but she brushed them away quickly. "It might not work for you much Malcolm, but it's yours if you want it."

"It is a well made sword, if nothing else once we are out of here I can sell the damn thing or give it to you for your wall..."

"It's yours to do with what you want as payment for putting up with us and all this."

"Uh thanks." The warrior waited til Bethany picked up her staff to pick up the great sword. He felt the surge of magic run through his body as it had to the sisters. He hoped no one had noticed him grind his teeth to bit back a scream. It did not hurt by any means, but it was disorienting. When he opened his eyes her saw his wife staring at him, as well as Anders. _"Figures magey would see that. Sooner or later I am going to have to come clean, but for now they don't need to know. Even if I was to tell them would they believe it's me or would Leelee decide to blast me?"_ "What are you staring at mage?"

"Nothing, just wondering what you are over compensating for with a sword that big?"

"Anders leave my husband alone or I will let him beat the stuffing out of you." Varric sighed and went to stand by Cullen.

"So Templar you have been very quiet? Everything alright?"

"Just wonderful. Fighting tainted Carta, seeing Anders turn into an abomination, and then lets not forget seeing Leigh do the same, yes dwarf I am just fine."

"You forgot to mention the fact that we are trying to find this Corypheus who may or not be a demon. This is a normal day for us."

"Sweet blood of Andraste, why did I agree to this ?"

"Sunshine asked nicely."

"Girl is lucky I love her a much as I do."

"I think it is the other way around there my friend." Cullen shook his head and laughed at Varric knowing he was right. Out if the corner of his eye Varric spied two more Carta running down the dark tunnel away from them. "Hawke over there!"

"Shit, we need to get them before they get a chance to warn anyone else. Come on." Leigh ran toward the tunnel at full speed, but skidded to a stop when she found she could not see much past twenty feet in. "Beth we need light." Bethany stepped up beside her sister and cast a look back at Anders who was staring at the floor.

"He looks scared." Leigh remembered that look from him, she had seen it years ago. It was the look he got before they were about to enter the Deep Roads.

"Love are you alright?"

"I...I can't go down there."

"I can leave Ori and Cullen here with you." He shook his head and gripped her shoulders tightly. "I have to end this Anders or they will keep coming. Even if we leave Kirkwall they might hurt one of our friends to get us to come back. I know you hate going down dark scary tunnels so stay here with your friend and Cullen."

"No, I won't let you go alone."

"Are you sure?"

"You need me, as much as I don't want to. I will be damned if you go face darkspawn by yourself."

"Well at least we know where the dwarves got the taint. Maker this is getting better and better. If it gets to be too much we will come back up alright?"

"I'm sorry love."

"For what not wanting to go down there where there are monsters? You have nothing to apologize for. Now that I know that there is darkspawn down there..."

"Makes you not want to go either."

"Well the last time we went down there we got locked in a place with demons and rock wraiths. I almost lost you and the others. Maker knows what would have happened if I had taken Bethany with us. I'm not sure she should go with us now. This adds a new element to all this."

"We'd better get this over with before I change my mind and run away screaming."

"Everyone are we ready for this?" All gave a solemn nod before plunging into the darkness.

OoO

Leigh wanted to scream when the magic barrier sealed them. She felt it just a bare second before it was to late to turn back. Now the only way out was through at least that was their hope. Anders leaned against rail and looked out at over the chasm. He saw hurlocks moving around, snarling as they went. The buzzing in his head was louder than it had been in years. The last time he had felt it like this was when they fought the Mother. Thinking about that made him want to retch over the railing. The buzzing got louder for a second and turned to a whisper. He could hear Justice trying to yell over the whisper as it got louder. The feeling of arms encircling his waist was the only thing to keep him from throwing himself into the chasm. He turned in those arms and found Leigh staring at him with concern in her eyes.

"Pash said she could feel your unease. It's worse isn't it from the last time?"

"More darkspawn. I can hear them buzzing in my head, making it hard to think straight. Once we get moving I should be alright."

"Stay close to me. I'll help in anyway I can."

"Thank you love." Varric came over to were they were standing and looked over the rail.

"And people wonder why I prefer the surface. Hawke let's make a deal that we never, ever go in the Deep Roads again."

"Deal and I am pretty sure Anders likes that deal too."

"You have no idea. I wish Raven had come with us. I guess I should do the standard warning again for those who were not with us the last time."

"That would be a good idea. I really don't want anyone getting tainted."

"Lucky me I'm already that way." Leigh frowned at Anders, but said nothing more as he turned to the others. "Do not touch the walls or try to eat or drink anything that is down here. If you are injured do not wait to tell us. Ori, Bethany and I can heal. Leigh can too in a pinch, but it is not her strong suit. You don't want any of the darkspawn blood mixing with your own. It is a sure fire way to end up with the Blight and were we are there is no way to get to the Wardens to help."

"What could the Wardens do about it if we did get the Blight?" Bethany's voice came out a bit higher pitched than normal as she clutched Cullen's hand for support.

"There is a slim chance if you contract the Blight becoming a Warden will save your life, but...it is a last resort and I would prefer not to see any of you have to go through it."

"Go through what?"

"I can't tell you that. Wardens have many secrets and that is one of them. Just don't be careless and we should be fine. We stay together no matter what. If you run off it is likely we won't find you before the darkspawn do."

"I saw the horde at Ostagar. You pray for a quick death if they catch you."

"Indeed, so now that I have given my lecture shall we go and find a way out of this blighted hole?"

"Lead the way Blondie." Anders rolled his eyes at Varric and took the lead with Leigh right by his side. The first room they came to was filled with genlocks feasting on the corpses of the Carta that led the group down here in the first place. Leigh remembered fighting them out in the Wilds when she joined the king's army. They had chased her up a tree and if not for the Wardens she would have met her end right there. The sounds of battle were deafening between the snarls and the clang of metal.

"Cullen move back!" The Templar jumped just as one of the genlocks leaped for him. He saw it crash to the ground frozen. With one quick movement Cullen slammed his sword down on the iced creature and shattered it. He nodded at Anders who had cried the warning and who had frozen the beast beofre it could make contact with the Templar. "Ori, can you shield the others?"

"Yes, what in the Makers name are you planning?"

"You don't want to know." Anders grabbed the back of Leigh's armor spinning her back to the others. Once he knew she was safe he let Justice out to finish the rest of the genlocks off. Leigh and Varric were the only two that had ever seen Justice out for a fight. The others of their group watching in fascination and horror as the spirit used both magic and brute strength to fight.

"Maker's mercy." Leigh could only give Ori a understanding look before turning her attention back to the fight. "I knew Anders had a anger streak, but that...what did they do to him?"

"They caged him when he wanted nothing more than freedom."

"It did not help that they took him away from the only person he ever loved." Leigh turned her head sharply and stared at Orianne. "Well at least until he found you."

"He said he had never been in love before...before me."

"He was, though he would never admit it. He fell for a girl when he was out on one of his escapes. When they dragged him back Anders spent a month in solitary confinement. He came out better than he had the last time they had done that too him, but he was also never the same. He never admitted it to us, but that girl left a mark on his soul that never healed."

"How long have you known him?"

"A very long time. He was one of the first people I met when I was brought to the Tower. Most mages hate the sight of Templars, I on the other hand was grateful to them for saving me from becoming a slave. I was to be sold to a Tevinter lord."

"So they saved your life."

"Yes, but I know they ruin just as many lives if not more then they save. I have seen the best and worst they have to offer, but you know that already. You and your brother saved me from Addler the night before Ostagar fell."

"I didn't think you recognized me."

"Your eyes make it hard not to. I have never met anyone with eyes like yours before or since. Your brother's eyes are blue, warm too."

"They were blue...He died Ori. When we were trying to flee Lothering." Orianne just nodded and bit her lip. "Looks like he is done. Stay here and let me make sure it is safe to go near him."

"It has been a long time since I have fought darkspawn. It feels strange not having the other Wardens here with us."

"You are a sight to watch Justice."

"I thought I could have been rusty as you mortals say. This is not a place to tread lightly."

"So I have seen."

"We will do our best to protect all of you. Anders will not forgive himself if something happens to any of you."

"Then we are in good hands with both of you protecting us."

"The others, they fear me."

"They just don't understand what we are. I know your a benevolent spirit Justice. The others will come around as long as you don't try to attack them again."

"I do apologize for that. I thought the threat was..."

"I know, you are his guardian, just as Pash is mine."

"It would have been better the other way around. You have not been treated as he has, abandoned, told he was evil and worthless. Your anger is not as burning or as deep."

"He is no longer abandoned and if I have anything to say about it he never will again. I'm trying to help him heal Justice, to show him just how much he is loved and wanted. You are also loved and wanted Justice. Your a part of him so I love you also."

"Hawke...thank you. I am fond of you as well. You have turned from a distraction to a true friend."

"I'm glad." Leigh smiled as the blue glow faded, returning Anders to her. "Who ever said mages can't fight never saw you in action."

"I had help, you my dear are the real fighter."

"Flatterer." Taking the corner of her cloak Leigh wiped the tainted blood from her lovers face so she could kiss him. Ori and the others made their way to the two so they could move on.

"Leigh come take a look at this." Bethany was standing in front of a magic barrier that housed a shade. "Why would the this be here?" Leigh grabbed her sister and pushed her back behind her when she saw a glowing orb appear beside her. The voice that boomed from the orb shocked both sisters.

"That voice it sounded like..."

"Father! He bound these demons? Why?" Leigh closed her eyes, shaking her head. She did not want to believe her father would ever have anything to do with a demon. He had always preached to both her and Bethany the evils of blood magic.

"I refuse to believe he would consort with demons. Maybe he just refortified the wards to hold them here." Bethany stayed silent and stared at the demon. _"Pash is the demon secure?" "The wards are weakening and will not hold for much longer. Your father did not call this demon here of that I am sure." "I am glad to hear that. I think I will feel safer just to send that thing back to the Void now." "This demon is old Leigh, be careful. It will be a challenge." "What isn't these days?" _Leigh felt where the wards were and she quickly broke them down.

"Sister what are you doing? Are you mad?"

"I will not wait for it to come and sneak up behind us. I plan on getting rid of it now." Bethany tried to stop her sister from breaking the last ward, but wasn't fast of strong enough to do so. Leigh pushed her back out of the way and took on the shade by herself. A loud curse from the bad of the room told Leigh the shade had called friends.

"Nice work Champion are you trying to get us all killed!" Leigh froze. Something in the warrior's voice sounded so familiar. With her mind in shock Leigh did not see the shade coming til it hit her. The scream that came from her lips was blood curdling as she felt the blood running down her back. The last thing she saw was the warrior slamming into the main shade making it disappear into a cloud of smoke. "Ori!"

"Bethany I need you. This is far beyond my scope to heal. Her back is shredded." Bethany got to her sister first and stifled a scream. Long ragged marks ran down Leigh's back. Leigh opened her eyes and moaned. "Just hold still Hawke." Anders and Cullen were too busy fighting the remaining shades. "Bethany help me she is losing a lot of blood."

"Just had to let that thing out didn't you?" Through gritted teeth Leigh tried to smile at her sister.

"You know I have never done anything in my life that made sense why start now." Bethany just shook her head as she healed her sister. Orianne placed her hand on Leigh's lower back and paused when her healing magic passed through her. The elf's eyes went wide and grabbed Bethany's placing it over the place she had been healing.

"Ori what in the name of the Maker..." Bethany felt what the elf had and covered her mouth before she screamed. "Oh Leigh, why didn't you tell us?"

"Tell you what?" Leigh turned her head to see the worried look on Bethany's face. "Beth what is it and I dying, what?"

"Your pregnant." Leigh sighed and buried her head in her arms. She had felt different, but thought it was just the stress of everything. More over she thought it had to do with her guilt over her transgression with Sebastian. "We need to get you out of here and I have to tell Anders."

"So he can be even more distracted than he is now. Beth I can see it, he is barely holding it together as it is."

"He has a right to know Leigh."

"You think I don't know that? I will tell him, but not right now. We need to get out of here and we need all of us on our game to do it. I let something distract me and I got hurt. Anders will try to protect me and end up getting himself killed. I won't let that happen. I can't lose him too Beth, I won't survive it."

"Fine, but if it gets worse down here I am telling him, with or without your permission." Leigh rolled off her belly to look back at her sister and smiled.

"Carver would be proud of you right now."

"Why?"

"How would he put it, oh yeah, you finally grew a pair." Bethany barked a laugh and pushed her sister back to the stomach so she could finish healing her.

"He would be proud of both of us. So would Mama and Papa. I just wish..."

"Me too. I miss them so much."

"It looks like they finished off all the shades. Your wound will be tender for a while, but it is healed. Just in time too, here comes Anders."

"Is she alright?"

"Nothing Ori and I could not handle. It will be sore for a while, but she is alright." Anders put his hand on the angry red welts on Leigh's upper back and sent a final wave of healing magic through her. He heard her content sigh before helping her off the ground.

"What made you think dismantling those wards was a good idea?"

"Pash said the wards were breaking down. I would much rather not have that thing sneak up on us so I broke the wards."

"A little bit of warning next time alright? This place has me jumpy enough without you running off and causing more problems." Leigh shot her sister a look and Bethany gave a curt nod of understanding. Leigh melted into Anders arms trying to find a little bit of comfort before they had to move out again. Finding out she was pregnant made her want to sing from the rooftops of Kirkwall, but it also scared the hell out of her. She had no idea how he would react. Would he be happy or would this send him over the edge? They had never really spoken about having children before. Leigh knew she wanted to be a mother, but her life had been to violent and complicated to do anything about it. It seemed the Maker or Fate had decided now was her time. That is if they ever found their way out of this tower. What lay ahead would truly test all of them to the breaking point and well beyond. Some things that are buried should stay buried.

**Sorry this one took so long to get out. Life has been a little hectic for me this past week. I am hoping the next one does not take as long to write. Thanks again for reading. To my reviewers again you have my heart felt gratitude. I still have a ways to go and I hope you stay with me on this. **

**Raven**


	28. Chapter 28

Gray eyes stared out over the edge of the chasm. Tears streamed down blood covered and dirt stained cheeks. The entire world seemed like it had just rend Leigh's heart apart. She could hear the others looking for her since she had run off. She did not care if darkspawn found her, on the contrary she would relish tearing them apart. She hated they before for destroying her home, killing her brother, but now they would take the man she loved as well. Not right away, but slowly. Anders would become just like the twisted heap of a man they had met down here. Her heart went out to Larius, it really did, but the sight of him turned her stomach. The man, if he could be considered a man anymore was mockery of life. His hair, what was left of it was matted and dirty. His skin looked like that of the darkspawn, bumpy and graying. His eyes were the worst part, black and blood shot. They were cold and dead just like the darkspawn. Leigh's arms instinctively crossed over her stomach and her hands began to rub against her skin.

"I refuse to lose him like this little one. I will find a way to...Maker, why? Haven't I suffered enough? Haven't you taken enough from me? I...I hate you." Her voice was a whisper at first, but her temper flared. She screamed loudly and the echo made everything down here pause. "Do you hear me Maker? I HATE YOU!" _"Leigh this is not..."_ "I don't care if this is not the time or the place, Pash. I'm..." _"Upset, yes I can tell. The Maker had nothing to do with this Leigh, it is just what is." _"You can't tell me he doesn't plan all this Pash." _"He has turned his gaze from mortals. He does not make choices for us. Anders made a choice to become a Warden or perhaps he did not chose it. That is something you should ask before you turn away from him." _"I did not turn away from him! I just...I couldn't...Balls! I'm such a sodding mess. I can't even think straight. Why didn't he tell me?"

"I was afraid to." Leigh spun around quickly and saw Anders standing half in the shadows. His face was a mask of utter sadness and regret. She could see the gleam of tears swimming in his eyes and it spurred her to run up to him. Her hands framed his face pulling him down til his forehead rested against hers. "Leigh, I'm so sorry...I..."

"Shhh, love."

"I keep hurting you. How can you stand it?"

"Because I love you and I can't see living my life without you. It just...it hit me hard knowing I will lose you much sooner than I had planned. This place has me such a mess. I can't think straight, I guess I should chalk it up to..." Leigh bit her lip hard to stop the next few words from coming out. She did not want to tell him here of all places he was going to be a father.

"Chalk it up to what?"

"Hearing my father's voice again, seeing what it is doing to Bethany, to me." His face softened and his body relaxed a bit. Leigh hated keeping the truth from him, but for now this was the way it had to be. She knew him too well. He would try to keep her out of the fighting and get himself killed trying to keep her safe. "I can't figure out why the Wardens wanted my father. I knew he was a strong mage, but he was a healer not a fighter."

"I can't answer that for you love. Larius would know why, but his brain is scrambled eggs from the taint. I 'm surprised he can still talk let alone not attack us on sight." Leigh saw the look in Anders eyes and knew what he was thinking.

"I will never let you get like that. I will end it first before I let you suffer like that."

"You won't be with me when I go to my Calling Leigh. Your not a Warden. It would be a fate worse than death for you." Again the image of the Mother flashed in his head making him cringe. A wounded expression crossed Leigh's face. She wanted to ask him why she couldn't go with him to his Calling, but she was too tired to fight with him about it.

"We will talk about this later. This is not the time or the place for this. We should...we need to get back to the others." Leigh turned quickly and tried to walk passed Anders before she broke down again. Her emotions were chaotic at best at the moment. She wasn't sure if it was from the stress of this place or the fact she was pregnant that was causing it. All she knew was she did not want to fight him. Even fiber of her being screamed for her to throw herself in his arms and let him be the strong one for a change. Let him take the brunt of everything like she had always done. She had only got a few paces away from Anders when he pulled her back and crushed her to him. Leigh could feel him shaking or maybe it was her that was shaking. She couldn't tell. Her head tilted up searching for his lips. She reveled in the fact that his kisses seemed to make everything feel better. Like they had a magic all their own to cure her wounded heart. It reminded her why she kept fighting to keep him even when she could tell he was trying to make her leave him behind.

"Promise me you will not run off again."

"I promise." They found the others standing around waiting for them near another demon trapped by the same wards the shade had been. Again Leigh heard her father's voice loud and clear. She longed to keep hearing it. Bethany stepped next to her and gripped her shoulder.

"I'll break the wards this time sister. Be ready." Leigh smiled and pulled her daggers. "Everyone ready for this?"

"Just break the bloody wards already and let's get this over with."

"Easy Junior."

"Sod off dwarf, I want to get the hell out of here before one of us gets killed." Varric opened his mouth then shut it not wanting to waste his breath. The crack of the wards breaking was the only warning they had before the abominations and profane attacked. The fight went much faster this time around much to Leigh relief. When the last of the profane turned to rubble Leigh saw the blue glow again. Her heart sputtered when Malcolm Hawke's voice sounded again. Her hand lifted up as if she was going to reach for the glowing apparition, but it stopped just shy. The phrase he had used over and over when Bethany and Leigh were children rang out from the glow.

"My magic will serve what is best in me, not that which is most base." The sisters could only exchange glances and smiles.

"He use to say that all the time to me when we practiced magic. It never made sense when I was younger, but Maker I understand it now."

"He was so proud of you Beth. Both you and Carver."

"He tried so hard to spend time with all of us. Whether it was dagger practice with you or swords with Carver."

"Carver was so proud the day he beat father with his sword. Papa held back his magic, but not his use of the sword." Inside his helmet the warrior smiled.

"He should be here with us Leigh. It feels empty without him." :Leigh wrapped her sister in a tight hug knowing the twins had a special bond she would never understand.

"He is here Beth. I am sure he is watching us and cursing about how stupid we are." A small giggle broke from Bethany and she nodded. "Come on, the keys are glowing we must be near the next seal."

"Larius said there are three seals hopefully the other one is close by too so we can get out of here."

OoO

Everything happened so fast that Leigh did not get a chance to comprehend what she was doing. All she saw was the ogre picking up the warrior to bash him into the ground and something in her snapped. She let out a roar that caught the ogre attention as she flew at it. Her daggers dug into the creatures arm enough to sever the tendons. The ogre roared in pain and lost it's grip on the warrior before it could slam him into the ground. With it's good hand it grabbed Leigh and flung her into the air. She twisted her body to try to land at a better angle, but soon realized she was going over the side of the chasm. Her hands clawed the air trying to get a grip on anything to stop her falling. She heard the screams of her companions and had a very funny feeling it would be the last sound she would ever hear.

"Gotcha!" Leigh felt her shoulder pop and blinding pain shoot up her arm as her descent was abruptly stopped. Through tear stung eyes she saw the warrior had a death grip on her arm. She also noticed he was hanging over the edge with only his feet holding on to the railing. "You have to climb up."

"I...I can't. My shoulder...I think it is dislocated." She heard him curse and yell up to the others. His grip on her arm slipped a bit and Leigh shrieked as she fell a few inches, "Give me your other hand." The warrior was using his other hand to hold his helmet on him head, but let it go to take her hand.

"Just hold on I'm going to try to lift you up." Leigh's eyes were slammed shut as fear gripped her harder than it has ever had. Leigh felt something hit her already wrecked shoulder and she opened her eyes to see what it was. She was just in time to see the warriors helmet fall down into the chasm and disappear into the dark. The warrior grunted as he pulled her up so she could get a better grip on him.

"Maker I don't want to die down here."

"Your not going to die, not if I have any thing to say about it. Now fucking climb." She shook her head and closed her eyes again. The warrior growled and screamed at her. "Dammit Leigh stop being scared and climb. I remember you being a lot more fearless than this. Where is the damn girl who faced down six Templars alone? Where is the girl who saved my sorry hide at Ostagar?" Leigh opened her eyes, but did not believe them. The blue eyes that stared back at her she knew very well as well as the sour face the warrior was making.

"Ca...Carver?"

"Yeah, now move your sorry arse Leelee and climb. I'm strong, but I can't hold on forever." Determination took over her fear and she climbed up as best she could with one arm. She felt hands grab her and pull her up over the railing. She was in a daze as she waited for Anders and Cullen to pull the warrior back over the railing also. Once he was safely over Leigh just stared at him. Bethany had been too busy fussing over her sister's arm to notice the warrior no longer had his helmet on.

"This is going to hurt Leigh. I have to pop your shoulder back in." She just nodded numbly and continued to stare at Carver. Cullen was the only other one beside the sisters who would know who Carver was. "Cullen, Anders I need you to hold her arm straight so I can do this.." Cullen was rooted to the spot having seen his friend that was thought to be dead.

"I'll help them Cullen you look like you've seen a ghost." Carver laughed and knelt beside his two sisters and smiled at Bethany. Bethany's eyes went wide and she stumbled backward.

"Carver!"

"Hello little sister." Bethany squealed and threw herself at her brother. Her fists pounded his chest plate out of anger at first. "Ouch Beth knock it off. Did Leelee teach you how to hit finally?"

"You...how..."

"Heal our sister and I will explain." Varric and Anders look thoroughly confused.

"Someone want to fill us in on what in the Void is going on." Leigh stood up cradling her injured arm. She could not take her eyes off of her brother.

"Anders, Varric I would like to introduce you to my brother Carver." Anders looked at Leigh in disbelief.

"Leigh?"

"What she said is true Anders. This is Carver Hawke." Cullen had come out of his shocked stupor. Bethany leaned into him for comfort and Carver narrowed his eyes at his old friend.

"What is it with this family and it's inability to find someone normal to be with? I mean Bethany a Templar, really?"

"I love him Carver. Cullen was you friend back in Lothering. You know him."

"I thought I did til he and his friends came to our house and offered to put or father down like a bloody lame horse!" Bethany turned to her sister to see if what Carver said was true.

"Carver that was the lead Templar who said that not Cullen. He didn't know they were coming to our home til he got there. I trust him. If I didn't do you think I would have let him anywhere near Bethany."

"Yeah, alright. Cullen you hurt her I swear to the Maker I will kick your arse." Cullen chuckled darkly.

"Leigh already made that threat and more Carver. I am sorry to say I fear her much more than I fear you." Carver shook his head and matched Cullen's chuckle.

"True my darling sister is very scary. I feel sorry for you Anders she is a hand full." Leigh huffed and glared at her younger brother. Anders could only laugh, he knew full well what a hand full she was, but he would have it no other way.

"I am not! At least I am not right now with my shoulder wrenched out of it's socket."

"Let's get that arm fixed love. Varric hold her arm and pull when I say." Varric took Leigh's wrist and pulled her arm out straight for Anders to pop it back in. Leigh clamped down her teeth to keep from screaming. She felt her shoulder slide back into position and the warm feeling of Anders' magic seeping through her skin. The pain eased, letting Leigh relax into Anders embrace. "That should do it. It is going to be tender for a while love."

"I'd rather have a tender arm then the alternative. I don't think you can fix a..." Leigh shivered and could not finish her sentence. Death came to close again for her liking. "I guess we are more than even for Ostagar Carver."

"No, I still owe you a few more saves for that battle. I would have been dead at least ten times over if it hadn't been for you coming to find me."

"Only to leave you behind after that ogre..."

"That was not your fault."

"How can you say that? We left you there for dead and you weren't." Carver held up his hand to silence his sister.

"Leigh I was dead. At least I thought I was. I woke up in this place and a woman in a silver dress told me my time was not up yet. She smiled and waved her hand, the next thing I remember is Ori and Wynne hovering over me at Kinloch Hold. They said they found me barely alive, but Ori did not want to leave without trying to help me." Orianne took her husband's hand.

"I remembered what you and he did for me at Ostagar. Carver took me to Wynne after Addler hurt me. He stayed with me the entire night holding my hand. Other than my friends in the Tower I had never met someone who was kind enough to do that for a complete stranger. It took us months to heal him enough for him to be able to wield a sword again."

"Didn't help I got caught up in the demon problem in the Tower."

"Wait he was in the Tower during Uldred's coupe of the Tower. How in the Void did I miss he was there?" Ori blushed and bit her lip before answering Cullen.

"Wynne and I had to get Irving to sneak him in past the Knight Commander. I owed Carver my life and did not want them to send him away. We had him in the basement. Since he was hurt by darkspawn we feared they would just kill him outright in case..."

"In case he was tainted. Maker's breath Ori, you both were very lucky he didn't have it."

"I know it was risky Anders, but he was well worth it. Everything he has done for me, for Ferelden. He is now one of the most respected and powerful army leaders. Teryn Cousland trusts him completely as does the king and queen." Leigh could not help but grin from ear to ear. Her brother did what he always wanted to do, make a name for himself.

"Our father always said Carver would make a name for himself. His little warrior, both of them would be so proud of you."

"I hope so. I was afraid once I found out you both were still alive that you would not like the fact I...married an elven mage."

"Carver, why in the name of the Maker would you think we would not want you to be happy. From what I have seen Ori is wonderful."

"Carver and my marriage has been a fight against the Chantry and some closed minded people. His position is the only thing that has kept them at bay for now."

"Ori you are married to a Hawke. Our family sticks together and defends our own. I'm just sorry to say you became part of a very unique family."

"So I have seen." Anders had not seen Leigh smile like this in a long time. It warmed his heart even with the whispers getting louder. The voice was promising if he brought Bethany to him, he in turn would give Anders a free life with Leigh. It's voice sounded like nails on a chalk board. Justice squirmed in the back of his head in pain. Whatever the voice was saying to him it seemed it was talking to Justice as well. He was so busy fighting both Justice and the voice that he did not notice Leigh touch his face til she pinched his nose.

"Did you hear me?"

"Sorry love Justice was talking to me rather loudly. What were you saying?"

"We are going to move on to the next seal. It looks like it is in that next room across the bridge."

"Alright lead the way." Her eye brow rose and she opened her mouth to say something, but Anders cut her off with a kiss. It was the only thing that silenced both the voice and Justice, giving Anders a small reprieve. It was enough to steel himself for a while longer til the next bought of whispers. He felt Leigh's fingers lace with his as she led him toward the seal. It gave him a small amount of comfort, but he feared if he lost himself to the whispers Leigh would pay the price and that was something he would not be able to live with.

OoO

"_Bring me the young woman. Her blood will free me and I will help you free the mages. You will be free to be with the woman you love. No Templars, no Wardens, just you and her together. Only I can grant you this. Only I can help you. I can feel the blackness in your veins. I can cleanse it away. You will not become twisted like the creature you follow. I will make you whole again, alive again. You will grow old and gray with her in your arms. Bring me the younger Hawke and all your dreams will come to to light."_

"_Do not listen to him Anders. He means to bring the world to it's knees. You can't..."_ In his head Justice was drowned out by the voice of Corypheus. Anders head ached and no amount of magic was helping to quell it. He tried to keep Leigh from see it, but it was getting harder since Carver broke the second seal. The voice now was a dull roar instead of a light whisper.

"Hey Hawke, it looks like there is another bound demon here." Leigh ran to Varric followed closely by Carver and Bethany. The desire demon that was bound there sighed and cooed at them trying to gain freedom. Pash growled in Leigh's head and asked to be let out to deal with the demon.

"_I take it you know her?" "Well enough to know she is very strong and very devious. Many mages fell to her siren's song. I owe her this." "Let me at least warn them before I let you out to play." "Thank you Leigh."_

"Pash said she want to handle this one."

"Then we will wait over there out of the way. Come on Blondie let's let your girlfriend's other half have some fun." Carver shook his head and pushed Bethany and Orianne back to the hallway they had come from. Anders stayed behind to watch just in case.

"Leigh are you sure Pash should handle this?"

"She wants to take care of it. I trust her."

"I know you do love. I'll be over there just in case she needs help." Leigh closed her eyes and let Pash take over. The desire demon hissed and backed away from the barrier.

"Ah I see you know what I am."

"Yet you haunt a mortal. You are no better than I." Pash just gave a predatory sneer. She placed her one hand fisted against the other which she held flat. When she pulled them apart a flaming longsword appeared in the space between the hands. Anders let out a small gasp having never seen anyone produce a weapon out of thin air like she just did. Pash waved out her unoccupied hand and broke the wards.

"Come out and play demon. I will show you just how unlike you I am."

"You think since you are who you are, you can bend the rules to your own whims. You are just like us spirit, jealous of mortals for the favor the Maker gave them."

"You know nothing of me demon. I have no need of jealousy. Mortals are his chosen, who am I to question his will?" The demon laughed cruelly and stalked around Pash. It took all of Anders and Justice's control not to jump in a rip the demon apart.

"I know who you are Compassion. Mortal made spirit. I was a spirit of your kind. I found it tiresome watching mortals wander our home like they owned it, but you were the worst of them. You had a place in the Golden City and you left it to what help your kind take over our home? Now you judge me, call me fiend. I will enjoy ripping that pretty body you inhabit apart. Your dying screams will be a lullaby for me."

"You don't have the strength to kill me demon." Pash waved her hand to egg the demon on as she took a defensive stance. "Come and try if you'd like." The demon smiled and cast a spell calling forth a group of skeletons to do her fighting for her. Pash growled and swung her sword out in a wide arch. Two of them shattered at the force of the hit, but the others kept coming. She let them get close enough to mind blast them turning them to dust. Pash had lost sight of the demon who floated up behind her and hit her from behind with a spirit bolt. The room filled with a ear shattering scream. Pash fell to her knees grimacing her sword skittered away from her on the floor.

"You have lost your edge spirit. That will cost you and your pretty little host. I wonder will the Maker take you back into his house." The demon started to cast laughing evilly as she did. "I will enjoy this." A flash of blue caught the demon attention before the flaming longsword pierced her through the middle. Her her tilted up and saw Anders or more correctly Justice standing in front of her with the sword in hand.

"You will die long before she ever will. Back to the Void with you." With a flick of his wrist the sword twisted and the demon gurgled a scream. Pash got up on shaky feet and threw a fireball to finish the demon off. Justice turned to Pash and wrapped his arm around her to steady her. "Are you alright?"

"More frustrated than anything. I am very rusty when it comes to fighting in this way." Pash sent a strong healing wave through Leigh's body fixing any damage done by the desire demon. "There that is much better."

"Why did you want to fight her at all? This group could have easily made short work of her."

"I needed a reminder Justice. I had to see what would happen to me if I gave into Leigh's emotions instead of helping her through them. There have been many times I have wanted to take over and let her have peace, but this life is hers. Mine ended a very long time ago." Sadness crept on Pash's face as she took a step away from Justice.

"I do not understand."

"Did you not hear the demon when she spoke to me? I was a mortal made into a spirit of compassion. I was born like any other mortal and died by flame."

"Why have you never told me this?"

"I did not think it mattered, I am what I am now. My mortal body is dust and ash. My soul the Maker took and made me like you. I retained my memories to an extent."

"This is why you have fought to save mortals in the Fade, because you were one." She could feel the anger from Justice and Pash backed away a step. "You said you died by flame when?"

"After Andraste was put to flame. I was one of the faithful that tried to carry on her message. It was never to be like it is now. Templars ruling over mages, the Chantry running everything with a strangle hold. She never wanted this. I tried to stop it and paid for it with my life and I would gladly do it again even with the outcome I faced."

"Does Hawke know of this?"

"Yes. I have told her. She understands and wants to help." The look of pure anger and hurt on Justice's face was clear. He glared at Pash and turned away. "Justice please, I never thought it was important to tell you of my past. I never meant to hurt you."

"I followed you and never questioned what you asked of me. I fought along side you for over a thousand years and you never told me any of this."

"I have always been an outcast. In my mortal life and in the Fade. You were the only one that never treated me like I was a mistake. I was afraid you would if you knew what I had been. You were the only anchor I had left. You are my friend, my protector and so much more than that. When I thought you had died fighting the Baroness I...I wanted to cease to exist."

"Why?" His face had softened a little seeing tears running down her cheeks.

"You were the other half of me. Part of my very soul. I felt alone, empty and I blamed myself for asking you to help those people. You freed them, but at the cost of your life. I could not forgive myself. The only thing I had left was Leigh and protecting her, but even that felt hopeless. Seeing you in the Fade when we were helping that young man made my heart wake up. You were alive, changed, but alive."

"I did not think I would ever see you again." His hand brushed her face and Pash leaned into Justice's touch. "Being in the mortal world was strange. All I wanted was to come back to the Fade. When that wasn't a option and the body I inhabited began to decay Anders offered to help me. This was a mistake for both of us. I thought I could help him, best his anger, but I failed. I am more demon than spirit now."

"You are still Justice, Vengeance is a part of you and Anders, but it is not all of who you both are. He was born of fear and hate, you are stronger than both. I know you are or I would have given up on you years ago." Pash took his hand and pulled it up to her lips. "I will never give up on you Justice, as Leigh will never give up on Anders. Love is stronger than vengeance. I should have said this eons ago, but I knew you could never return it. I love you. You are my soulmate for lack of a better word and I will fight to keep you from falling."

"I never understood what love was til I fused with Anders and Kristoff before him. The feeling is uncontrollable and frightening."

"Love is powerful. It breaks down barriers and makes you do things you never thought you could do. The danger in it is there is a darker side to it just like anything else." Justice nodded and looked back to where the rest of the group was hiding. He was them all staring at both him and Pash with wide eyes. He felt Anders trying to take back control, but he held him back. Justice wanted so badly to do what he never could have done if he had not been trapped in the mortal world. He had seen memories of it from Kristoff, but they were hollow. With Anders being his host he had been able to experience more of what love was. He let his hand reach back to twist his fingers in Pash's hair before pulling her closer.

"I wish I had been able to say this to you a long time ago, I love you." Pash froze as his lips brushed hers. To Justice she tasted like lyrium and the Fade. Pash melted into his touch and kissed him back. Their kiss ended much sooner then either of them would have liked, but here was not the time or the place for lingering kisses. The glow from both of them faded letting their hosts have control back of their bodies.

"That was..."

"Completely romantic."

"I was going to say creepy, but romantic works." Leigh sighed and pushed Anders forward. The voice of her father made her turn back around. Bethany and Carver ran to join her.

"It is done Leandra, we can go home, us and the baby. I pray it takes after you love. I would never wish this cursed magic on anyone." Leigh and Bethany both flinched hearing their father say that. Carver wrapped his arms around both his sister's shoulders and gave them both a reassuring squeeze. "I pray you never learn what I have done here. I crossed a line I never wanted to cross. I can't wait to come home to you and leave this place. You are the only bright light I found in Kirkwall." The glow faded leaving the three Hawke children in various forms of emotion. Bethany broke out of Carver's embrace and threw herself into Cullen's waiting arms. Orianne took her husband's hand that he had balled up into a fist. She knew him too well and knew he would start hitting things til he broke his hand. Leigh stood stark still staring at the place the ghost had been. Shaking her head to clear it, she felt sick.

"Hawke you don't look so good."

"Hearing your father did blood magic tends to do that Varric. What did the Wardens hold over him to make him do that? He never would have used blood magic willingly. He taught both Bethany and I that blood magic was wrong, evil, to never under any circumstance use it."

"The Wardens could have threatened him with taking him back to the Circle Hawke. He did what he had to, to stay free."

"If they did I have a few select words for Larius. None of which will be gentle." Anders knew full well that the Wardens did not discourage blood magic. Quite the opposite they used any mean necessary to defeat the darkspawn. Using a mage for strengthening blood wards was not far fetched. He knew Ashlyn would never do anything like this, but other Wardens did not have her moral compass. He could tell Leigh was trying to rein in her emotions and make sense of what was going on. He had no answers for her and it killed him. "Anders would the Wardens do such a thing just to get what they want?"

"I'm afraid they would, but I know my commander wouldn't. Fighting darkspawn it...to survive Wardens will do anything even use innocent people."

"Is that how you ended up a Warden?"

"No love, Raven saved my life by making me a Warden. I would have been on the end of the hangman's noose otherwise." He had never told her the circumstances that led to him becoming a Warden. Anders had just told her he was at the right place and the right time and wanted to help. That explanation sounded more noble than having been saved by them. He saw her cringe and her expression soften. "I'm not saying what Wardens did to your father was right, for as much good as we do, we can also do a lot of damage."

"So the Wardens would sacrifice innocents to achieve their goals?" Bethany had stepped up to join the conversation. Anders sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose to ease the throbbing headache he had from the voices yelling in his head.

"They are known for that, yes. It depends on the Commander and how askew their moral compass is. Let me put it this way, when I joined the Wardens we had to defend Amiranthine from darkspawn. The next to last battle took place in the city. The Commander, Nate, Justice and I went to try to help. When we got there the city was completely overrun. It was a hopeless battle, we were told to burn the city to the ground and go back and defend Vigil's Keep. Raven refused to abandon the poor souls that were left in the city. Even after we got word the Keep was under attack she still would not leave the people to their fate. We fought and saved dozens of innocent people, but the Keep was ravaged. A lot of soldiers died so that the people of the city lived. Sometimes there is no perfect solution Bethany. People die, innocent, wicked, it was Raven's choice and she decided with her heart. Most commanders don't think that way."

"No wonder the people under her command are so loyal."

"We were a family of sorts, but that took some doing, mostly because of her. We were lucky she has the patience of a saint." Bethany just nodde and turned to her sister who was now leaning against Anders.

"Well Leigh we have one more seal to get to and Maker willing we can get out of this nightmare. I am looking forward to seeing the sun again."

"Just be thankful little sister you did not come with us the last time we went to the Deep Roads. It was far longer a trek, though I would give almost anything to deal with that place again instead of this one." Anders wrapped his arm around Leigh's waist. Both of them shared a look before walking on. Leigh half expected to see Larius skulking in the shadows, but he was blissfully absent. Seeing the pained look on Anders face made her want to stay close to him. He had been acting strangely since they got down here, but now it seemed it was getting worse. The deeper they got the more he mumbled to himself or had a far away look. A cold feeling of dread hit her like a ton of rock right in her gut. It was a feeling she always got before everything went totally wrong. Leigh had learned long ago to trust that instinct. It had kept her alive and now she prayed it would help her keep all of them alive to see this Corypheus dead. She would not let her father's sacrifice go in vain. Corypheus had no idea who he was dealing with and she was going to show him, whether he liked it or not.


	29. Chapter 29

"This is much wetter than I remember the Deep Roads. Maker's breath what did the Wardens do?" Anders looked around at what they surmised was the bottom of this prison. It was filled with dwarven ruins and green glowing water, at least he thought it could be water. The place smelled foul and the taint was heavy here. He could feel the hum of the darkspwan loud and clear down here, on top of the now deafening voice of Corypheus. It was getting harder for him to stay focused. They had already ran into a group of deep stalkers and he was completely useless in that fight. He almost hit Varric with a spell instead of the creature. If Leigh had not jumped in front of it and batted it away Varric could have been hurt very badly. The dwarf to his credit did not seem to be angry with Anders, just concern.

"How many times have you trekked through the Deep Roads Blondie?"

"More times than any one ever should, but less than my fellow Wardens. There are things down here far worse than just darkspawn, like their mothers."

"Darkspawn have mothers? Wait you know what I don't want to know. I'll never sleep again."

"Good choice I know I did not sleep for weeks after seeing one." Anders shivered and rubbed his arms to fight the cold chill that he could not shake. "Remind me why we are doing this again?"

"Isn't it obvious Blondie. I love trouble and you think Hawke is cute." Anders looked up at Leigh who was trying to catch up with her brother after all these years. He smiled, even covered in dirt and grime she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.

"She is pretty cute." It was just then the voice stared up again louder than ever. "_**I can make this endless fighting stop, just give me what I want. Free me brother, we are not so different you and I. Both wanting freedom, both wanting a world that does not vilify us. Bring me the girl, and you can have whatever you want."**_ Anders winced, it was getting harder for him to ignore the voice and it's promises. Justice was quiet which worried him. He couldn't take it anymore as the voice persisted. "Shut up, I am not listening to you!"

"Jeez Blondie I did not know I was that annoying."

"Sorry Varric, it's not you it's this damned voice in my head."

"Justice wants out so he can make out with his spirit lady love?"

"No, just...it's nothing never mind."

"Whatever you say Blondie. So how are you feeling about Junior over there?"

"He is their brother Varric, I'm extremely happy for them. They both have lost so much, it good to see them get something back. Plus Ori loves him and she deserves to be happy after all the abuse she has taken."

"So you and her...?"

"No, Ori was a friend, nothing more. Funny thing is she swore she would never willingly be with a human. Guess we all break our own rules from time to time."

"What rule did you break Blondie?"

"I swore to never let the Templars keep a hold on me and to never fall in love. Well the Templars kept catching me and Maker help me I fell in love not once, but twice."

"Ah so there was someone before our Lady Hawke, so spill."

"Not much to tell really, she was another apostate who tried to help me get away."

"Come on Anders there is more to it than that."

"That is private Varric. Let's just say she was a lot like Leigh and leave it at that."

"You are absolutely no fun."

"I am lots of fun. Not my fault you want to know about a woman that I prefer not to talk about." Varric huffed and sped up his pace leaving Anders to bring up the rear of the group. They fought a few more pockets of darkspawn before the path started to head back up. "_**If you will not bring them to me of your own free will, I will force you to do it." **_A blinding pain shot through his head making him double over. His gasps caught everyone's attention. He felt hands on his back trying to soothe him, but the pain and the voice got more intense. "_**For all you have fought me you will be punished. I want her blood now. Bring your lover to me!"**_ Anders shrank away from Leigh's touch and began to thrash about.

"Love what is it, what's wrong?" Every time she took a step toward him he stepped back.

"I...there is too much taint in my blood, I can't shut him out..."

"Who out?"

"Cory...ahhhh, help me love...I...won't be...controlled!" Carver cursed and drew his sword. Cullen followed suit and stepped in front of Bethany to protect her. Varric aimed Bianca and prayed he would not have to put a bolt into his friend. Leigh stood still with her hands up. Anders was glowing as he normally did when Justice took over, but this felt different. This was not Justice that stood before her it felt dark and cold. Glowing blue black eyes stared at her, appraising the group.

"I can't take you anywhere can I?" "_Pash can you calm him down?" "It is not Justice who is in control Leigh...I...I'm not sure who it is." "Wonderful, why did I pick a man who had multiple personalities?" "He is your other half, that is why you are with him." "Maker help me your right. I just hope I can get through to him without having to hurt him."_ Leigh stepped forward and Anders pulled his staff to defend himself. "Love I'm not going to hurt you, just calm down. The others are going to put away their weapons too, right?"

"Sod that sister, he's gone bloody barking mad."

"Carver please your not helping, lower your sword now!" Leigh turned her full attention back to Anders. Taking another step forward she heard him growl and she stopped dead. He slammed the staff into the ground and Leigh stared in horror as two shades appeared. "Anders don't do this." He sneered at her and waved the demons forward. Leigh held up her hand halting them. Her voice echoed through the deep just like it had on the Wounded Coast when she controlled the other demons set after her. "**You will obey me and leave this plane now!"** The shades vanished leaving the two mages to square off against each other again.

"You are stronger than I thought."

"Whoever you are, you'd better let go of him now or so help me when I find you I will rip you apart with my bare hands."

"I doubt that." Leigh side stepped the fire ball he threw. "He seems to have a very high opinion of your abilities. He will find his faith in you was misplaced."

"You have no idea what I can do, now let him go!"

"He disobeyed me. I offered him his freedom in exchange for the blood of that girl. He could have realized his dream, now he will know what happens to those that defy me." Lightning arched out of his fingers and slammed into Leigh hard. Pash had only enough time to shield a part of Leigh from the blast. The rest of her violently spasmed as she hit the ground. Inside his head both Anders and Justice raged. "You shield part of your body with nothing vital, but leave the rest to be attacked. He was wrong about you." Leigh gritted her teeth and rose to her feet swaying, but standing.

"You said nothing vital there huh, I think what is there is pretty fucking vital. Let him go!" Another bolt hit her chest straight on. Her heart sputtered, but kept beating weakly. Her vision clouded, but she stayed on her feet. "You want to play then try this on for size." Her hand flew out in front of her and she attacked him sending a much more potent bolt of energy through him.

"_**She is strong, but foolish."**_ "_She'll kill me to keep you from getting free." "__**Not if I kill her first. She is not defending herself, only shielding a small portion of her body."**_ Anders concentrated enough and took control back over his magic sense for a moment. It was long enough for him to see where she was shielded. If he had control over his body his heart would have stopped. "_No! Leigh, Maker help me. Justice we have to...Justice please!" _He could feel the spirit with him, but Justice felt far away. "_We are going to lose them both if we don't work together to shake his hold. Dammit Justice help me!"_

"He's fighting you isn't he?"

"He is not strong enough. I will be free and this world will remember the power I wield." Leigh let out a harsh laugh. Her body screamed for her to rest, but she was not about to lay down and let this creature take the one thing that made her life worth living. She had not wanted to use the extent of her power, since she still was not sure how strong she was. She could kill him if she let her magic go to full strength. It was not something she wanted to chance.

OoO

"What is she doing? Why doesn't she just drop him already?" Carver growled.

"She loves the man Junior, now just stay out of it." Varric dug in his pocket for a blunt tipped arrow. It would hurt like hell when it hit Anders, but do no permanent damage. Varric watched Leigh's hands waiting for the signal to fire. The two rogues had come up with a sign language the last six years that only they understood. She had signaled him to be ready and to stop Anders not kill him. "Your sister knows what she is doing."

"Maker I hope so or I am going to skin that mage alive her loving him or not."

"Carver listen to him, don't get involved." Carver saw the worried look on his wife's face was not helping his mood. "Anders is a very strong mage."

"He is a bloody healer, not exactly a scary Ori. Other than his passenger who I thought was in love with the one Leigh has, I have not seen anything spectacular from him."

"Healers no more ways to kill a person than a elemental mage ever could. They can make your organs stop working just a they can heal them. A healer mage turned blood mage can be the most fearsome foe anyone could face."

"Your not helping me love, so he could kill my sister then with a flick of his wrist?"

"Yes." Orianne voice came out a bare whisper. Varric kept his eyes on Leigh as she and Anders traded blows. He knew she was holding back, not wanting to hurt Anders if she could help it.

"Come on Hawke, stop playing cat and mouse and let me take the shot." The sight of red tendrils bursting from the ground and wrapping around the blonde man was all he needed. He unslung Bianca off his back and loaded the blunt arrow. Holding his breath he took the shot and heard the grunt of pain and a crack as it hit Anders. Leigh swayed on her feet, but remained standing. Her back was still turned toward the others, having her sole attention on the man in front of her. The tendrils tightened and a unearthly growl sounded from the blonde mage.

"That does not sound like either Anders or Justice. What is in the name of the Maker is going on?" Bethany stepped forward and stopped next to Varric who was lining up another shot with his blunt tipped bolt.

"I don't know Sunshine, but he'd better snap out of it soon or I'm with your brother on what to do about it."

"I thought you two were friends?"

"We are, but if he hurts your sister he won't be able to live with himself. I'd be doing him a favor, trust me, he and I have spoken at length about it."

"That is not good Varric."

"No, no it's not." Varric squeezed the trigger and let his next shot fly. This one struck Anders in the gut causing a low hiss to escape his lips.

"You will pay for that dwarf!"

"Yeah defiantly not Blondie's voice. Great is he double possessed. Andraste's tits!"

OoO

"You think you can stop me from becoming free girl!" Leigh twisted her hand and the tendrils tightened even more causing a moan of pain to escape her lover's lips. Seeing him like this was killing her, even though she knew it wasn't him in control at the moment. She had to concentrate even harder now that she had him in a death grip. One slip and she could crush the very life out of him. Her body was shaking from the strain of the hits she had taken as well as the focus she had to keep.

"I think when I see your sorry ass I will make you pay for this. Now let him go!"

"No." Leigh growled and blinked back tears. "_You have to get Anders to fight him harder." "Tell me how, I'm trying everything I know Pash." "Pretend to be more injured than you are." _Leigh thought about it for a second and knew she could fain something, but it would be dangerous if it went wrong. "_Pash if I use the nightshade dart I have can you stop it's effects on the baby?" "I can, yes. You are going to make him think your heart is failing?" "That's the plan. It skipped a few beats from that first bolt he hit me with. Good thing it wasn't Justice doing it. Anders is not as strong with electricity as Justice is." Use the elfroot dart you have first to help ward off the lasting effects. You will be sleepy and your heart will slow, but the other damage will it could cause will be averted. I will protect the child." "Pash I have I told you lately that you are the best." "No, but thank you."_ Leigh pulled the two darts out of her leather wrist guard. She had made them easy to access without anyone knowing what she was doing til it was to late. Most people would be dead or at least paralyzed before they realized she had something in her hand. She closed her hand around elfroot dart first and felt her body get a boost. Then she let the nightshade one prick her flesh on the other hand.

"I wil...will make...you …..." Leigh's eyes rolled back up into her head and she fell forward. Her heart started to slow almost to the point of stopping. Her father had called this little concoction False Death. This trick was a gamble since now her spell that was holding Anders was not being sustained any longer. She hoped none of the others hurt Anders or worse. Once the spell broke the mage got to his feet and sneered.

"Weakling." Carver roared and unsheathed his weapon readying to charge. He froze when Anders grabbed his head and started screaming.

"_We will not be controlled anymore!" _Seeing Leigh drop woke Justice from what ever stupor he had been in. The combined will of both man and spirit started to unravel the emissary's hold over their body. "_It is about bloody time you woke up to help!" "Now is not the time for this Anders, just fight him." "__**You will pay for this."**__ "For all the pain you caused her I swear I will visit that on you ten fold, now get the fuck out of my head!" _Corypheus' control shattered and Anders pitched forward. The pain from Leigh's spells made him curl into a ball since she had hit him quite a few times. Couple with the fact Varric had broken his collar bone and cracked at least one rib with his bolts Anders felt like he had been run over by a herb of brontos. He heard Bethany and Ori shouting as they worked on Leigh to heal her. Carver and Cullen just glared at Anders while Varric was checking on him.

"I...I couldn't fight him."

"I know Blondie, just stay still. The girls have got Hawke you just rest." Varric helped him drink a potion to help him heal and stayed with him. Anders didn't know if it was because he was trying to comfort him or to keep Cullen and Carver from killing him. "She'll be alright, don't you worry. Hawke is a strong woman."

"She never should have tried to fight him. Maker what was she thinking?"

"You know Hawke when it comes to you all her sense seems to fly right out the window."

"I don't know why she bothers. I am not worth her life. Ouch what was that for?" Varric smacked Anders upside the head quite hard and gave him a exacerbated look.

"You really are an idiot you know that right? She loves you to the point of insanity sometimes, but who am I to judge." Anders just sighed and closed his eyes to keep the dwarf from seeing the tears that were threatening to flow. The potion was taking effect and he felt the pain start to recede, but he dared not move from the spot he was sitting. If he did he knew one of the heavily armored men would flay him like a fish. He just listened to the women as they healed Leigh and prayed.

OoO

"I don't understand why her heart is beating so slow, we fixed the damage that was done to her. Maker what did he do to her?" Ori sat back exhausted from healing. She was perplexed.

"She should have awakened by now. Did we miss something?" Bethany ran her hand over her sister to check if there were any other injuries. She found none.

"I don't think so. I'm no where near as good a healer as Anders is, but I'm not sure letting him near her is a good idea right now."

"Me either. Carver is barely holding back that he wants to kill him. Cullen as well." Bethany took Leigh's hand and felt something hard on her palm. "What the...?" She plucked the dart out of her sisters hand and held it up to the light.

"What is that?"

"A dart of somekind, but what in the Void did she have on it?" Ori turned over her other hand and found another one imbedded in her palm this one looked dark red in color. After taking it out she handed it to Bethany. "This one smells like...shit she used nightshade."

"Nightshade why? It's a poison." Bethany shook her head and tried to figure out why her sister would want to poison herself. "Bethany I can't heal this."

"Neither can I. Leigh was the one of the family that knew how to make potions and poisons." Bethany glanced at Anders who's eyes were still closed. She stood up and pushed passed her brother and Cullen. "Anders?" His eyes opened and Bethany could have sworn he aged twenty years since they had been down here. "We...she...oh just get over here." He got to his feet quickly and headed with Bethany toward Leigh. Cullen and Carver blocked the way both with swords drawn. "Look boys, if he doesn't help her we might just lose her and it will by both your faults, now sodding move." The men parted shaked by the normally soft spoken Bethany's outburst. "It looks like she used nightshade, but I can't figure out why, unless she was going to use it on you and hit herself instead."

"Beth it still doesn't explain the other dart. It smells like elfroot. Could she have been trying to counter act the poison?" Anders ran his hand over Leigh's palm that had the nightshade dart in it. His other hand went to her stomach and he sent a small pulse of magic into her. He was sure the baby would be dead from the poison. He let out a short gasp and tears stared to flow again.

"The...baby."

"Oh Anders, I'm..." Ori placed her hand on his shoulder for comfort.

"No Ori the baby is fine. How..." He felt the strong presence of magic surrounding the child and he smiled. "Pash protected it. Wait..." He shifted his hand just slightly and felt another tiny heart. "There are two."

"She is going to have twins?" Bethany looked up at her brother and saw his face soften into a smile. Anders closed his eyes and focused on Leigh's blood and the amount of poison in it.

"Did she ever use this before?"

"Not that any of us know of. Our father was the herbalist of the family. I only learned how to make health and elfroot potions. Leigh might have learned this from her rogue trainer."

"She had a trainer? I just thought it was something people were born with. The sneaky side I mean, the other stuff yeah you need someone to teach you." Varric found this a interesting piece for his stories, that is if they ever got out of here alive.

"Yes a woman our father saved years ago. In return she taught Leigh how to be a rogue. Leigh was a quick study. Dagger play, poisons, acrobatics, you name it she could do it."

"Dad didn't call her Little Scoundrel for nothing. I still can't figure out how she can disappear into thin air when there is nowhere to hide."

"She was never fun to play hide and seek with. She always found us and we could never find her." Bethany looked down at her sister's placid face and brushed her bangs out of her eyes. "She was always right there when you needed her though. Even when you didn't want her to be."

"We will have to make camp til the poison wears off. I was able to dilute it enough so her heart is beating normal again. She needs to rest." Anders stood up and started to walk away.

"Where are you going?"

"I...I'm going to keep watch over there."

"She'll want to know your alright when she wakes up, don't you want to stay with her? One of us could keep watch."

"You can tell her I am fine Beth, I need to clear my head. If I sleep Corypheus might try to control me again and I will not put any of you in danger like that again." Without another word Anders vanished into the dark. The rest of them set up a makeshift camp. Bethany and Ori stayed close to Leigh while Carver and Cullen took positions at either end of the camp.

"Varric where are you going?"

"To find our wayward Warden and get him to come back here so Hawke can see him when she wakes up."

"That sounds like a good idea. We don't need her running out there trying to find him in the dark."

"My thoughts exactly Sunshine. I'll be back even if I have to drag him back here by his ear. Don't worry I will have him back before our lovely leader wakes up."

"Thank you Varric."

OoO

Anders stared out as his mind raced. Twins? He had never though he would have one child let alone two. Mages were not allowed to dream of having a family. His emotions were doing battle between a soaring sense of joy and a feeling of pure horror. He did not heard Varric come up behind him.

"How ya doing Blondie?"

"Go back to camp Varric. I'm not in the mood to talk."

"Then just listen. Your acting like an ass. It wasn't your fault what happened and Hawke will be fine. Every time things get hard you seem to run away. Being a father scare you that much?"

"It's not that Varric and you know it. I could have killed her today, as well as all of you. I'm not sure I am strong enough to fight both Justice and Corypheus off at the same time. Leigh risked not only her life, but the lives of our unborn children as well. If it hadn't been for the spirit she is fused with, our..."

"I know Blondie, but they are fine."

"And what happens when we finally reach the end of this and have to fight that darkspawn. You know full well she won't just stand there and let us fight him alone, not after what he did and the threats he made. Leigh is stubborn and fiercely protective of all of us."

"She is also not stupid."

"Really you call poisoning yourself not a foolish move?"

"When you put it that way...but you have done some pretty stupid things too."

"I know, and I will probably do more before this day is through."

"Let me tell you a story, but you must swear to me you will never tell another soul what I am about to convey to you."

"Alright, I swear."

"I knew this girl back in my days running with the Carta, she was much like our dear Lady Hawke. Caring, stubborn, and the most beautiful woman I had ever laid eyes on. You've heard of Dusters I suppose?" Anders nodded and Varric continued his tale. "Bartrand forbid me from making nice with anyone below my station, not that a surface dwarf has one mind you. He was still very dwarven pride minded, while I just wanted to make a name for myself and tell stories. This girl and I got into all sorts of trouble and had a fun time getting out if it too. She always thought she wasn't worth my time or my affection. We got into a fight over her worth. She telling me she was nothing and me trying to convince her she was. Sound familiar?"

"All too much."

"Well then maybe this will help you stop wasting the time you have with her by running away. Now where was I, right the fight. She had heard rumors one of the Coterie wanted my head on a pike because of a deal gone wrong. She wanted to help and went to meet them in my place..." Anders had never seen Varric choke up about anything. It took the dwarf a few minutes to continue. "I found out too late that she was down there, when I got there she was almost gone. I got to at least tell her goodbye and that I loved her. Something I had never admitted before to anyone, not even myself."

"Varric I..."

"You know even after all these years I can still hear her humming that stupid drinking song we use to sing. Blondie I don't want either of you to end up like me. If she thinks you are worth it than dammit man act that way. Don't run away every time you think you will hurt her. Hawke is tough she can take it."

"That woman was her name..."

"Yeah, she helped that nug humper Gerav make my baby. Gerav finished her the same night Bianca died. I found it fitting to remember her this way and to make those bastards that hurt her pay. So that is the story on how Bianca got her name. I have never told anyone this. Bartrand and Gerav were the only other people who knew what happened. I like you Blondie and I love Hawke like sister so don't keep breaking her heart. Or Bianca and I will have to break your head."

"Having just been on the receiving end of some of Bianca's bolts, I really don't want to do that again."

"Well Bianca doesn't want to have to hurt you again, so let's get back to camp and be there when your lady love wakes up, what do you say?"

"I say thank you Varric, you have been a very good friend to both of us. Your going to be an uncle, you know that right? Telling them all the great stories of their mother's adventures."

"And their father's, yeah I think I am looking forward to it." Carver eyed both men as they came into view, but said nothing when Anders went to sit next to Leigh. Varric went to his bed roll to try to get some sleep before his watch. Anders sat there for a few minutes next to Leigh. He felt her body shift and her head rested on his chest. He looked down at her and saw her crystal gray eyes staring back into his amber ones.

"Your mad at me aren't you?"

"A little yes."

"I couldn't figure out any other way to get you free of him Anders."

"So you poison yourself."

"I wasn't in any danger and neither was the baby. Pash made sure of it."

"So when were you going to tell me about you being pregnant?" Leigh winced and worried her lower lip before answering him.

"I found out from Bethany and Ori healed me after that shade raked my back. I didn't want you to find out down here. I was afraid you would stop me from fighting and get yourself killed."

"Do you have so little faith in me?"

"Maker's mercy love, I have all the faith in the world in you. I just know you too well. I know you will try to protect me and get yourself killed doing that. I'm not fragile Anders, I can still fight."

"Well you are in a delicate condition now love." Leigh groaned and buried her head into the feathers of his jacket.

"Are you alright with this...I mean...

"You mean did I want to be a father? I never dreamed I could be, but yes love. I want this Leigh. I want to have the life I've heard of when you talk about your family. I want to be there for all of it."

"I was so worried you wouldn't, not with everything going on in Kirkwall and how distant we have been these last few months..."

"That has been my fault Leigh not yours. Once we are out of here we are going back to Ferelden. I have much to make up for and I will start by doing what I asked you when we were in Orlais." Leigh's head snapped up quickly and all she could do was stare wide at at Anders.

"You asked me a lot of things in Orlais love, which one do you mean?"

"You know quite well what I said."

"Oh you mean that thing you blurted out when we were in the nice inn before we got to Chateau Haine." She gave him a devilish smile and nipped at his chin. "I thought that was just said in the throws of passion."

"It was at the time, but seeing Ori with your brother and they are married why not us?"

"Because it is against Chantry law, and I'm not sure Tevinter would be a good place for us to go."

'Who said anything about Tevinter I was thinking once we get to Ferelden finding a small Chantry to get married in." Leigh sighed and lay back down on his shoulder.

"They test your blood love to make sure your not a mage before they will marry you."

"Your parents were married right? How did they do it?"

"My father had to drink down a large vial of magebane. He barely made it through the ceremony without passing out. The Revered Mother thought it was nerves since my mother was very pregnant with me."

"Following in her footsteps I see."

'Anders don't be an ass, magebane is not pleasant."

"Neither is nightshade love. I've had to drink a magebane potion before, nasty stuff, but I survived and I would down a whole barrel if that meant being able to declare my love for you in front of the Maker and all who claim to serve him."

"Did you drink it on a dare?"

"No to save my sorry skin. It helped hide me from the Templars if only for a little bit. I swear it took days for the taste to finally go away. I could barely eat the good meals..."

"The good meals what?"

"The good meals the person who was hiding me cooked. I didn't use to be this skinny you know, I once was quite meaty."

"Hmm, I can't picture that. Since I've known you I have only been able to put a little bit of meat back on your bones and Justice keeps undoing my good work."

"He knows, and he is sorry. Right now he is sorry for a lot of things like not helping me break free of Corypheus sooner. I could feel him there with me, but it was like he was chained."

"Pash and I have a theory and it isn't good. We think he might have been at one time a Somniari."

"Shit, that's not good Leigh."

"I know, that's how he was able to get to you. Dreamers can drive people mad, mage or not. We can alter the Fade and the waking world. I have no desire to do so, so my power went into fueling my spells. Pash told me that Dreamers can control others through dreams or in your case I think it was through the Taint. We can make people do what we want as long as their will is weaker than ours."

"Your not making me feel better about this Leigh. If he is that strong then we need to find a way to keep him sealed."

"My thoughts exactly, I don't fancy facing someone like that."

"Can Pash gauge how strong he is?"

"Not without having him right in front of her no, but from what I could gather he is pretty strong to do what he did to you love. Your not weak willed."

"It did take him til we got to this place to finally break me down. He was whispering to me since we set foot into the darkness. I...I should have told you."

"Yes, you should have, I would have tried to shield you from him. Dreamers can ward off other Dreamers, just for future reference."

"Alright I get it, next time I will tell you I am hearing whispers from a very old darkspawn emissary. Now that we have gotten off track for what I was asking before, not that this place is the most romantic of settings for this, but...I'd better ask it now or lose my nerve completely. Leigh Hawke will you be my wife?"

"Aren't you suppose to be down on one knee or something like that?"

"Maker woman, you really are a pain in the ass. Do you want to bloody marry me or not?" Anders hadn't figured his voice would carry so well to the others, who were not staring at the couple waiting for her answer.

"Of course I do. So yes, yes I will marry you." Leigh heard Bethany let out a joyful whoop. "There goes keeping it a secret."

"If we weren't underground I would be shouting it from the roof tops. Though I know one person who will not like this news." Leigh grimaced and shook her head,

"He has no say in it and if he tries anything so help me I will make sure he really is the last of his line."

"If he cares anything for you love, he will want you to be happy."

"I am happy, or at least I will be very happy once we can get out of this horrid place. Well since we are all awake let's get going and finish this."

"Not so fast there love, you might still have the poison in your body." Leigh arched into his touch as his hands passed over her, sending small pangs of magic as they went. He let his hands linger for a moment at her stomach. The echo of the two tiny heartbeats brought a smile to his face. Once he was sure she was fine Anders helped her up off the ground. "I don't feel anymore darkspawn about. We should be safe for now."

"It looks like this trail is heading up. Let's hope it leads to fresh air and sunshine."

"One can only hope Varric. Okay next time any of us has the bright idea of going into the Deep Roads, we all knock them senseless." Anders let out a wicked laugh and hugged Leigh from behind.

"Last three times we've come down love was following you, so you are giving us permission to knock you senseless."

"Oh right scratch that then, just stop me okay. I am now really understanding why you hate the Deep Roads so much."

"And you thought it was because I hated being in enclosed places filled with things that want to kill me."

OoO

"You know I am starting to think all Grey Wardens are quite mad sister."

"Why is that dear brother?"

"Oh I don't know, we are following one who looks like he is mostly darkspawn himself and chasing ones who want us to free this ancient emissary so he can stop the Blights." Leigh gave her brother a sideways glance and he just chuckled darkly, shaking his head. "This is all in a days work for you isn't it?'

"You have no idea." Leigh skidded to a halt when she saw the Warden Janeka stand against the wall of the room they had just entered.

"Look at you, barely able to string two thoughts together. You only made it this far because of Hawke."

"At least I did not go back on my oath and try to free him."

"Really you should listen to him Janeka, Corypheus will destroy every thing in this world if you free him. I'm surprised the Wardens were able to trap him at all."

"What would you know of darkspawn Hawke you are no Warden, even the one you have with you knows nothing."

"Hey now there is no need to be rude, I know you are playing with fire Janeka. I've faced someone like Corypheus before, just he was not as powerful. They want to taint the world make everyone like them. You can't let that happen." Anders hoped his words would make Janeka think things over, but when she spit out a spell and called a revenant and arcane horrors to finish them off, he knew it had fallen on deaf ears. "Kill the horrors first they are fueling the revenant!"

"Carver, Cullen, Larius take him down while we handle the horrors!" The two warriors charged at the armored undead creature. The four mages began casting hitting the horrors with everything they had. Varric kept an eye out just in case Janeka and her fellow Wardens tried to hit them while they were battling. "Bethany hit that one with ice!" The younger Hawke sister froze the horror and watched it shatter when Leigh sent a stone fist into it. Anders and Ori stood back to back striking at their opponents. Anders put a shield up around them while Ori hurled fire balls.

"We need to drop the last two quickly!" Anders saw the two warriors struggling to take down the revenant. Even with only two horrors healing, it was enough to keep the monster on it's feet. "Leigh ensnare them." The ground shook as thick roots broke through the ground entrapping the horrors. Leigh's hands slowly curled into fists causing the roots to start crushing them.

"Burn them!" Ori and Bethany hit both horrors with fire storms. The air filled with dying shrieks as the flames consumed them. "Anders hit that bastard with a glyph of paralysis." She saw the green energy surround revenant, but not before it hit Cullen with bone jarring hit. She heard Bethany scream as his body hit the ground. Carver let out a roar and charged full force. The high pitched whine of metal scrapping metal echoed in the room.

"Just die already, you...ugly...fucking...bastard." Each hit Carver made punctuated his words. The last hit he made had the revenant's head fly off and it's body fell heavily to the ground. "Void take you!" For good measure he spit at the creature. Bethany ran to Cullen's still form and turned him over. His breast plate had a long deep gash through it.

"Anders!" Seeing the amount of dark red blood that was pooling around the Templar did not make Anders hopeful on his survival.

"Shit, we have to get the breast plate off so I can see what I am doing. Ori I'm going to need your help. Varric get the potions and bandages out of my pack now!" The dwarf tipped the pack over dumping the contents onto the ground. Leigh and Carver worked quickly to dislodge Cullen from his armor with out moving him much. Once it was off Anders saw just how bad the injury was. "Leigh get Bethany away now!" Leigh grabbed hold of her sister before she could see the extent of the damage done to her lover.

"Why won't he let me see?"

"He needs to concentrate Beth. Cullen will be fine. Anders is the best healer in all of Thedas."

"But there is so much blood, Leigh if he dies..."

"He won't. He loves you to much to leave you behind." Bethany bit back a sob and nodded.

"Leigh go help them, I'll stay here with her."

"Thank you Carver." Leigh tried not to gasp when she saw just how badly Cullen was hurt. The long tear down his chest to his stomach was wide open. What was even more disturbing was he was awake now and his eyes found hers. They pleaded for her to stop the pain any way she could. Anders and Ori were working as fast as they could to stop the bleeding and close the wound. Leigh wasn't sure it would be enough.

"Leave him we must stop Janeka." Leigh rounded on Larius faster than he expected.

"We will not leave him you bloody bastard. I came down here with seven people I am leaving with that many to go home. Janeka can't break the seal without my blood so she can't do a thing to free Corypheus. Now unless you want that death you were so hoping for when you originally came down here, you will shut your fucking mouth and let us help him." The old Warden growled at her, but kept his mouth shut. "_Will he make it Pash?" "His light is fading." "Can we help him?" "Only as a last resort. Mercy's Touch is very draining, if I help him now I might not be able to help you against Corypheus." "I can handle him and I'm not alone, the others can help me make sure he never reaches the outside world." "He will not be easy to stop. If he is like you, it might be difficult to kill him." "I have ever faith in my ability Pash and I have a few tricks up my sleeves he doesn't." "Then take us over to Cullen and I will heal him." "Thank you." _"How is he?"

"Leigh we...there is too much damage. We can't fix it fast enough. I'm so sorry." Both Anders and Ori were shaking from exhaustion and Cullen was still bleeding badly.

"Let me try."

"Love your healing skills aren't strong enough. Ori and I have exhausted everything we had. There is no hope."

"There is always hope." Leigh knelt down next to Cullen and took his hand. Anders caught the red glow in her eyes and the voice was not just hers it was Pash's as well.

"I...I'm going...to die...aren't I?"

"Not today Cullen, not down here." Her skin cracked and glowed giving the room a warm light. She heard the murmurs of the others, but did not pay them any mind. The warm pulse of magic flowed through her to Cullen's broken body.

"Holy Maker, how...?"

"Mercy's Touch, the spirit that resides in her is a powerful healer Ori. I forgot she can do this since she is not a healer herself."

"I've never seen anything like it. His wound is...it's closing so quickly."

"She did the same for me when I was trampled by two ogres. As long as there is still a spark of life in the body she can heal it. It is a gift from the Maker himself. Pash is unlike any spirit I have ever encountered."

"Your spirit seems to hold her in high regard."

"He loves her. That is the highest regard anyone can get." The glow faded in the room and Leigh sat back trying to catch her breath. The power needed to heal Cullen had drained both her and Pash. Bethany took a few tentative steps forward when she saw Cullen sit up on his own.

"Sweet blood of Andraste how did you do that?"

"It wasn't me, thank Pash."

"Why would she heal me? Aren't I the enemy, being a Templar?"

"Cullen you have never been the enemy. She actually liked you when you and I were younger. She said there was a light of purity in you, a true sense of the Maker. She protects those she deems worthy of mercy and grace. You my dear friend fit that to a T."

"I am extremely grateful."

"She says you are very welcome. Just don't go charging into anymore swords til we can get you a better breast plate. I don't think she or I have it in us to do that trick again anytime soon."

"This coming from the woman who got impaled by a Qunari blade."

"You know it is not nice to piss off the person who just wove your guts back together."

"Technically you didn't remember."

"Why is ever man in my life a smart ass?" Anders wrapped his arms around her and laughed in her ear.

"Because you are my love."

"You know you are the worst of them right?"

"Yes, love I know, but you were the one who wanted me in your life so you only have yourself to blame."

"No one ever stated I was sane and when I get my hands on that bitch Janeka she'll have wished she'd never been born." Anders knew that look in her eyes, he had seen it only a few times before, but he knew she meant those words. Janeka had hurt someone Leigh cared about and that was unforgivable in her eyes. He wondered if she had that same look the night she took her vengeance on the Templars that hurt her father. He tightened his grip around her waist a little placing his hands over her still firm belly. Anders was never one for praying, but now he found himself pleading with the Maker to see them all out of this safely. Fate had given him a reason to keep living if only to see the faces of his children and share a life with their mother. At this point he did not care if he was able to free the mages of Thedas, as long as he was free it was all that mattered.

**Sorry this one took so long the new DLC sucked me in and would not let go. As always I thank you all for reading. I am far from done with this story so I hope you all stay with me and continue to enjoy. **

**Raven**


	30. Chapter 30

**Since we are coming up on Halloween I decided to take a small little break from Bound By Compassion and write this little one shot of Leigh Hawke and Anders. Since I have them sharing a nameday which I call the Hallow in my story. I set if after Leigh has become the Champion and after they go through the Mark of the Assassin mission. I hope you all enjoy and as always I own nothing it is Biowares world and characters I just play in it.**

"Maker it is good to be home!" Leigh unceremoniously dropped her cloak and dagger belt by the door to her room followed closely by her armor. Her Mabari hound Tovis hovered close to her while she stripped out of her clothes. She heard him give a soft huff as he left the room telling her the other house resident had entered her room. "Are you just going to stand there and watch or are you going to help me?"

"You know how I love to watch you undress love, but if you would like help I am more than willing to." Leigh let out a short snicker before curling her finger to beckon her lover to come across the room. "I guess I will take that as you want help."

"Just get over here Anders!" He gave her a smirk and crossed the room stopping just short if her.

"I'll help you if you tell me when your Name Day is."

"Please don't start that again, it's not important. I haven't celebrated it since I was seventeen. It is just another day to me."

"Well to me it is isn't, it is the day the Maker gave me the most wonderful woman I would even know. So please just let me show my appreciation for the fact I have you in my life and tell me."

"Your impossible, you know that right?"

"And your stubborn, what a perfect pair we make. Now tell me or I will have to torture you."

"Torture?"

"I am thinking no sex til you tell me and no massages either." Leigh shot him a withering look and he just laughed.

"Your are an evil little apostate. You know you are torturing yourself too right?"

"I am willing to do it just to find out when your Name Day is." Leigh let out a sigh and her shoulders slumped in defeat. As much as she wanted not to tell him when her Name Day was the prospect of having him in her bed, but not being able to be intimate would kill her. She had had enough of that for those long three years that he decided to be an idiot and push her away. She felt his hands on her bare shoulders and she leaned back into him. "So are you going to tell me?"

"Fine, but I swear if you try to throw me a party I will..."

"Tell me to go sleep in the clinic." She turned and saw the mischievous look in his eyes. His lips where on hers before she could speak. She hated when he used his power over her to shut her up, but she did not try to stop him. She finally found her voice and caught her breath enough to speak

"You know I would never do that. This bed gets so cold and lonely without you." She loved the look on Anders face right at this moment. When he smiled the world seemed to brighten. "Don't think I am going to let you win all the time love, this is a one time deal. So you want to know when my Name Day is. Come on I'll show you."

"Can't you just tell me?"

"No, it it better if I show you." Leigh threw on her house robe and padded down the stairs to their library. Anders followed after her and saw her take a book from the shelves. The book looked very old and very well worn. "My father stole this book from the Circle here before he left. It is a book of ancient Thedas holidays. Some of them aren't even truly celebrated anymore. The Hallow is one of them. The Chantry has made it a mockery of what it use to be. It was a night that the Veil was thin and spirits talked to the living."

"So you were born on the Hallow, that...that explains a lot about you."

"And what is that suppose to mean?" Anders put his hands up at her warning look.

"It means you are more in tune to both this world and the Fade. It is rare to be born on the Hallow since it use to be a bad omen if you were, but that is another Chantry lie."

"I guess they did teach you about it in the Tower."

"Some of it, but I knew most of it before I went there. Anders are superstitious people and my father was one of the worst of them. Guess that is why he said I was demon spawn." Anders never really talked about his family much and the look on his face broke Leigh's heart. She placed the book on the desk they shared and wrapped her arms around his waist. "It's alright love, I've dealt with the fact my father hated me."

"Still, why would he think your demon spawn? I know you have a mischievous side, but your never malicious."

"Other than being a mage...well let's just say you and I have much more in common than the fact we are both host to spirits."

"You were born on the Hallow too?"

"Yes, surprised?"

"No, not really. It is said that those born on that day are drawn to others like them. Guess that is why I never let you get away."

"I am glad of that. So now since both of our Name Day is coming up in less than two weeks what should we do?"

"Let's have a party. This book has some old customs that I think we could pull off. Varric can help me get some of these items..."

You said you didn't want a party."

"I didn't, but I remember how much fun we had when I was little dressing up. Pretending to be a dragon or a wolf. And the food was always so rich and sweet." Anders caught a gleaming light shining in her eyes while she talked. He had seen it many times in the children that ran Darktown when they were given candy or a few copper. It was a joy of sorts and he was glad to see it in her again.

"So are we going to go all out and wear costumes too?"

"Sure, why not. After having to endure that damn hunt in Orlais I need to have some fun."

"And seeing you in a sexy costume will definitely help toward you showing your gratitude for me rescuing you from that dungeon."

"Love Tallis got me out of there not you."

"But I was coming to rescue you, Tallis just stole my thunder."

"I know, now let's look this over and start planning. You and I are going to have a Name Day to remember. I wonder if Fenris will let us use his home, since it is much bigger than ours."

"All you can do is ask, I doubt he will have a problem with it."

"Alright love let's get cracking."

OoO

Having such a time constraint on planning the party did not stop Anders and Leigh from trying to make this celebration something for the nobles of Kirkwall to talk about if they were to be invited to it. Varric was a Maker send having found some of the more outlandish items. Leigh had the idea of inviting the children of Darktown and their families to join in the festivities. She spent time with the children making masks and decorations then taking them to Fenris' to put them up. Fenris to his credit was a lot less broody when the children were around. He actually smiled a few times when he thought no one was looking at him.

"Thank you again for letting us do this here Fenris. My home is just too small for all these kids to run around in."

"You are welcome Hawke. Varric told me to leave the cobwebs for dramatic effect, whatever that means."

"The Hallow is all about the darker side of things as well as a day to remember our lost loved ones."

"The darker side?"

"Things that scare us, but we can make fun of."

"Why would you want to make fun of what scares you?"

"It is a way to stop being afraid of it."

"I will never understand humans."

"We are hard to understand aren't we?" He just nodded and handed her some decorations to hang over the doorway.

"You are the hardest to understand."

"Oh, why is that?"

"You are a noble now, as well as Champion of Kirkwall and you are still hanging around with the rest of us. You still help out in the Clinic even when you don't have to, why?"

"I love all of you, your my family so I am not going to abandon any of you and as for the Clinic. I enjoy helping people. Most of them down there are my countrymen. I have been blessed and I want to share it."

"You are a wonder Hawke."

"Thanks, I think. Hand me that bunch of streamers."

OoO

"Here you go Hawke this were hard to find, but I found it." Leigh inspected the mask Varric had found for her.

"Varric this perfect. I have the rest of rest of my costume done, but this will put the finishing touch on it."

"Do you know what Blondie is going as?"

"He wouldn't tell me. I'm not even sure where he is keeping his costume. I hate it when he is secretive."

"Well he requested a mask as well, but swore me to secrecy, so don't even give me that look serah."

"Please Varric?"

"No Hawke wait and be surprised."

"He told you why we are doing this didn't he?"

"That you two share a Name Day, yeah he did and I in turn told the others. So if I were you I would get ready to write out a bunch of those fancy thank you notes your mother got for you because you are getting presents."

"Maker I am going to kill that man." Varric smirked as he saw Anders sneak up behind her. His fingers gently pinched her sides and she shrieked.

"Who are you going to kill love."

"You!"

"Aww, what did I do now?"

"You told him!"

"I did about it being my Name Day, Bethany told Varric it was yours, so don't blame me love."

"Varric you..."

"I wanted to see you kick his ass a little. I have nothing to entertain me since we came home from Orlais. Sorry those snobby nobles rubbed off on me." Leigh glared at the dwarf and stalked off toward her room. "How do you deal with her temper Blondie?"

"I have learned to duck and hide. So Varric is my costume ready yet?"

"Ready and waiting. Meet me tonight and you can try it on. I better go before she comes back out and decides to flay me. See you tonight Blondie."

"See you Varric and thanks."

"No problem, she'll have fun you'll see."

"I hope so, she deserves it after all that happened last year."

OoO

The morning of the party was chaotic as Leigh put the final touches on Fenris' home. Orana made sure that the food was delivered by mid day and Bodhan with his son Sandal made sure the children were all set in their costumes. Their families looked around the mansion with mouths agape in awe. Leigh had outdone herself with the decorations. There were streamers over every doorway making it nearly impossible to see into the next room. The children all stood frightened to move til they saw Leigh walk out from behind on set of streamers. She still had yet to put on her costume so the children were not afraid of her.

"Come in, come in!" Leigh saw the apprehensive look on the little children's faces even under their paper masks. She gave them a sweet smile and knelt down to their level. "You know the masks you wear are meant to scare anything away that scares you. Like Liam here is a Mabari strong and proud, they show no fear. Cath your a knight nothing can get past your armor. Tonight is for fun and to be someone else if only for a little while."

"Serah, where is your costume?" Leigh tilted her head at a small girl named Isla and gasped.

"Your right I have forgotten my costume. Whatever will I do? I will need all of you to protect me from the things that go bump in the night." Cath stepped forward drawing his wooden sword and puffed his chest out to look bigger.

"I will protect you my lady. No foul demon will harm you." Leigh pulled out one of her handkerchiefs and handed it to him as a favor of her admiration.

"My hero, will you please escort me into the main room and ward off those dastardly spirits?" He gave a stiff nod and led the way. The rest of the children followed suit, as did their families. "There is plenty to eat and drink so please do not be shy. The other guests should be arriving soon and we will start the games." Leigh stood back and watched the people she had come to know and love from Darktown lose themselves in the fine food and drink. She wished she could give them more than just this one night of revelry, but even her purse had it's limits. All she could do was help Anders take care of them down at the Clinic and use some of her influence as Champion to get the other nobles to donate clothes and blankets. She was so enthralled in watching the families she did not hear Fenris sneak up behind her.

"It seems to be going well." Leigh jumped a bit and placed her hand over her heart.

'Maker, you scared me Fenris." He backed up enough for her to give him a good once over.

"What do you think?" He was dressed as a wolf, but the detail he put into the mask and the costume was impressive.

"Fenris you look...just like a wolf. If you weren't standing on two legs I would have swore you were one."

"Isabela helped me find the furs and Merrill helped with the mask." This information made Leigh grin from ear to ear. Fenris hated mages more than anyone else she knew and for him to have Merrill help him was a huge step forward.

"I am glad they could help you. I can't wait to see what everyone else will be wearing."

"Where is yours?"

"I wanted to wait so I didn't scare the children. They will be leaving a little bit after sundown. The rest of the party is for just our little group."

"Ah, I see. It looks like some of the others have arrived I will stay here and make sure the families have what they need."

'Thank you Fenris and thank you again for letting us do this here. I know you like your solitude."

"It is fun to get out of it every once in a while." Leigh disappeared through the streamers and greeted the newcomers to the party. Only by the ears alone did she recognize Merrill, but the other person with her was a complete surprise. Merrill was dressed as a wood nymph. Her mask a glittery collection of leaves in all the colors of autumn. The woman beside her was dressed in a gown fit for a princess. It was not til she saw Ser Donnic step into the mansion that Leigh knew who was behind the gilded mask.

"Aveline is that you?"

"Yes, Hawke it's me. I must look like a fool."

"No you look...Maker there are no words. You look beautiful and Ser Donnic you are looking quite handsome as a prince."

"Thank you Serah Hawke. Aveline did not believe me when I told her she looked like she belong in a palace somewhere. Hopefully she believes you."

"Donnic..." Aveline turned bright red under her mask and Leigh placed her hand on her oldest friends shoulder.

"Aveline you put the statues of Andraste to shame and you know me I don't mince words."

"Thank you Hawke, we'd better get in there."

"Donnic watch out for some of the knights in there they might try to steal your princess. Cath especially." The older man smiled and led his wife up the stairs to the main party room. Leigh then turned to Merrill who was staring wide eyed at all the decorations.

"You alright Merrill?"

"How did you do all this in such a short time?"

"Wasn't easy, but I had a lot of help. Your costume is amazing. You made this all yourself right?"

"The one good thing about being Dalish is you learn to sew and make things. Where is your costume?"

"I'm waiting til later since I am the host I did not want to scare the little ones."

"You are too good to everyone Lethallan. Where is Anders?"

"Good question. He had a very ill woman he was healing when I went to collect the children. It might take him a while to get here."

"Isn't it his Name Day too?"

"Yes, but you know Anders he will not abandon a patient and if I was a healer neither would I. It is part of the reason I love him so much."

"I can't wait to see your costumes …..." Merrill's eyes went wide with fear and Leigh spun around to see what was a matter. The sight of a Templar made her blood run cold.

"Can I help you?" Her voice was like ice as she stepped in front of Merrill ready to protect her. The Templar let out a laugh and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Yes you can, I was wondering if you could help me find my wayward mage,oh wait there he is." The Templar turned her head to look over her shoulder. The mage she spoke of wasn't a mage at all.

"Cullen what...you're wearing robes?"

"And your sister is wearing Templar armor. We thought it would be fun to switch for a day." Bethany took the heavy helm of her head and shook out her hair. Leigh couldn't help herself and went to hug both her sister and her old love.

"How are you walking in that thing?" Merrill exchanged hugs with Bethany and gave a short bow to Cullen.

"It is light practice armor and if you look really close most of the back plate is gone."

"I'm surprised the Knight Commander let you come."

"Oh, that well she thinks we are going to Starkhaven to help them rebuild their circle. Which we are, but a delay of a day or two is not a bad thing. We couldn't miss this after Varric told us you were throwing a party."

"I am so glad you are both here. Beth I would keep that helmet off until Anders sees it's you just in case Justice..."

"I understand sister. Oh I got you something, since it is your Name Day. Cullen and I found it going through the some old records in the Gallows." Leigh took the small package from her sister's hands and opened it. Inside the small box was a pendant in the shape of a hawk. She turned it over and on the back was carved her father's name and birth date. Her eyes welled up with tears. "We found it with the names of our Grandparents. Cullen has a letter sent to Ferelden to see if they can be found or any other living family member."

"This was father's. Oh thank you both, this is a wonderful gift. Please let me know when you hear back from Ferelden." Cullen nodded and kissed her on the cheek.

"I will. It looks like you have two more guests arriving. A dwarven noble and a sister of the cloth." Bethany almost fell in a fit of giggles seeing Varric and Isabela. Varric had a mask that looked like he had a beard and Isabela was wearing the most clothes Leigh had ever seen her in. Her hair was pulled back into a bun and the half mask she wore was plain.

"Hawke this place looks amazing. You and Fenris really outdid yourselves."

"Isabela you...well you don't look like you at all."

"Isn't that the point kitten, we dress up to be someone different for a night. Well I can't get much different from who I was to this."

"No you can't. Varric so that is what you would look like with a beard. I have to say I like you the other way."

"I do too, but for the night I can pretend to be what I was suppose to be. Shall we go in and mingle my fine friends?"

"You all go on ahead I still have two more due here hopefully they get here soon."

"Do you really think Choir Boy will come after the small tiff you had over the party?"

"His loss if he doesn't. I understand the Chantry banned celebrating the Hallow because of what it represents to them."

"Even that would not keep me from coming to celebrate your Name Day Hawke."

'Sebastian you came!" She marveled at his costume as she greeted him. The feathers on his cloak tickled her skin and the mask he wore was also covered in feathers. "An eagle?"

"Grandfather always called me Eagle Eye, I thought it was fitting to honor him on this day."

"I know he would be proud of you."

"Are you not dressing for the eve?"

"I will later. Go up with the others I will be there shortly. I want to go find Anders since this party is for him too." Varric gave Sebastian a light push and the group headed up the stairs. Leigh grabbed her cloak and headed out the door. She took the quickest way to Darktown and found Anders was still in the Clinic. He was sitting next to a cot staring at the covered over body that lay there. Leigh walked in quietly and placed her hands on his shoulders. He looked up at her with tears in his eyes and Leigh knew he had lost the fight trying to save the older woman from death.

OoO

"It's not your fault love, she waited too long to come for help." Anders just nodded into Leigh's shoulder. He was not sure he could talk without breaking down.

"She told me she lost her husband a year ago and that she was...she was ready to go join him. That's why she didn't come to me when her cough started. She only came here because she didn't want to die alone out there in the cold and the filth."

"And she didn't, she went to the Maker being cared for clean and warm."

"I told her it was my Name Day today. She told me she was sorry she had to die today. Maker it is not like she had a choice. She was luck to last as long as she did. Leigh, I'm...I'm not sure I am up to celebrating to night."

"I understand love. Go home and get some rest. I will see you after the party is done." Leigh stood on her toes and kissed his lips softly. He could see the small flash of disappointment in her eyes, but she covered it quickly. "Here take the key to the basement of the estate. I will take the long way back to Fenris'."

"You shouldn't walk home alone love."

"I have my daggers Anders and I can keep to the shadows. I will be fine. Go rest."

"I love you Leigh."

"And I love you, always." Anders sat back down for a moment to collect himself before leaving for home. He cast a frost spell to keep the body from being attacked by flies and other creatures that would want to eat it down here is Darktown. He would have to have Leigh ask Sebastian to have this woman's body given a proper funeral, but he was too tired tonight and Leigh had her party it would have to keep til morning. He sighed and got to his feet gathering his staff and his bag to head home.

"You are acting a fool young man. You should not abandon that lovely girl to her party alone tonight." Anders spun staff ready and what he saw froze him to the spot. "Love is a precious gift do not waste time mourning the death of a tired old woman such as myself. I am at peace dear boy."

"How...but you...?"

"I died, yes. It was my time lad. I will finally be reunited with my husband. You made the last few hours comfortable and you kept me company something I sorely lacked in this past year."

"I'm sorry I could not do more."

"I know, you have a kind heart healer. I've seen what you have done for the people down here and your lovely woman has done much too. You both are a bright light in Kirkwall. You should be celebrating tonight with her your shared day. You have that costume you showed me, put it on and surprise her."

"Are you really here or am I dreaming?"

"It is the Hallow my dear boy, I am here because you need a small push in the right direction."

"Would not be the first time a spirit gave me a push."

"You should listen when they do for the most part."

"Thank you, I..."

"No need to thank me lad, just go and have a good time." Anders turned to grab his costume from the back room of the Clinic and when he returned the spirit was gone.

"Thank you again Ada, rest in peace by the side of the Maker and with your husband." He ran out of the Clinic to the passage toward home to wash and change. He would surprise Leigh and make this a night to remember.

OoO

Leigh bid the children and their families good bye after hours of games and good food. They left with baskets full of food and toys. Her friends had fun playing the games and interacting with the children. Leigh's favorite to watch was the bobbing for apples. Ser Donnic won that game out of all her friends. Varric with Bianca's help won pin the tail on the halla. The evening was now left to Hawke and her friends. Leigh sighed and went into change into her costume.

"I'll be right back everyone. I left my mask at home."

'Would you like an escort Hawke?"

"It's not that far Sebastian. I'll be alright." It did not take Leigh long to go home and change. She was a bit worried when she saw Anders wasn't back home yet. She knew he probably was still down at the Clinic cleaning up or writing. She quickly changed into the costume and stared at herself in the mirror. The silken cloth hugged her every curve, the boots she bought to go with the costume gave her a good inch or tow more of height. She had to get use to the heels though. She was glad she had good balance. The body suit had a hood for her to hide her hair making her look sleek and smooth. She walked out her front door and stared up at the night sky. The moon was at it's fullest and had a soft orange glow to it. The air was cooler signaling winter would soon be gracing Kirkwall again. The dried leaves crunched under her boots and she felt like a child again. Out of the corner of her eyes she saw a shadow following her. "Is anyone there?" The shadow came into the light showing a older woman. "Can I help you?"

"No child, but I can help you. You have been told that you were not wanted by your Grandfather and I. At first that was true, but to see what you have become we could not be prouder."

"I'm sorry do I know you?" Leigh voice raised and octave from both surprise and a small amount of fear.

"No and I did not get to know you either child, but you are the image of your mother with your father's eyes and hair. I was such a fool to tell your mother I never wanted to see or hear from her again. Seeing what you have done, all the things you have faced and still have yet to face, I am filled with a great sense of pride and guilt."

"We found the will in the estate leaving everything to my mother. Was that because of your guilt or you really wanted her to come back and reclaim what was hers?"

"A little of both. I love both my children, but Gamlen...he never was meant to be a noble. He lost sight of what that meant long before your mother left here, but you, you know what it means to be noble."

"I just do what is right and fair. I have a comfortable life and I want to give that to my friends and my countrymen as much as I can."

"I have seen that much. Your friends are quite an eclectic group. Slaves, pirates, Dalish and apostates."

"You forgot a dwarf, a captain of the Guard and a prince. I see them as family, they are really all I have left save Bethany in the way of family. I do have Gamlen and his daughter, but it is not the same."

"Build your family however you can. Love freely. I forgot that when I disowned your mother. She was in love and I spit on it. I should have been better to her."

"My father gave her three children and a good life. It was s simple life, but it was good."

"I know dear. I came here to see you and hopefully give you some advise."

"That being?"

"Hold on to what is dear to you. Never let it slip from you no matter how hard it gets to hold on, keep fighting. You are as much an Amell as you are a Hawke. We are a stubborn lot."

"And hard headed. I do not give up easily."

"So I have seen. Just know you are loved Leigh Hawke and take comfort in that."

"I do. Thank...Thank you for coming to me tonight and letting me know we weren't hated. It hurt my mother more than it hurt us, but it is still nice to know just the same." Her grandmother nodded and faded away leaving Leigh alone once more. She tried to ask Pash if what she saw was real, but the spirit was silent and Leigh realized she hadn't heard from the spirit all day. It was unnerving to say the least. She wondered if it had to do with how thin the Veil was in Kirkwall and especially tonight of all nights. "Best get to the party before they come looking for me."

OoO

"Where the devil is Hawke, she should have been back by now?"

"Easy Choir Boy she'll be here. Maybe she met up with Anders and...well, they should be here shortly." Both men turned when the heard the door open hoping it was Leigh.

"Who are you?"

"Nice to see you too Sebastian. What are you two doing down here?"

"Waiting for Hawke. She had to go put on her costume."

"Why didn't she just bring it here?"

"I don't know Blondie, she said she was afraid to scare the kids. Though I can't see how she could with the costume she has. It isn't really scary at all. Sunshine's is much scarier."

"Bethany's here?"

"And Ser Cullen too."

"Wonderful, just what we need another...Holy Maker is he wearing robes?" Varric almost fell over laughing. Anders voice carried to the others and they all turned to look at him. Bethany slid the helmet of her head and smiled at him.

"We thought a little role reversal would be good for us. What do you think?"

"You would have to be the prettiest Templar I have ever seen."

"Thanks Anders. Your costume is superb, where did you find that mask?"

"Varric found it and the clothes. You know me I have a thing for feathers, guess that is why I love a Hawke."

"Leigh is going to flip when she sees you. You know my father had a costume like this when we where younger, he only wore it on the Hallow."

"I saw it in one of his old journal entries. He described it in great detail and even sketched some the mask in the margins."

"I when we moved to Lothering he had to stop wearing it because of the Chantry. He didn't want someone to think he was a blood mage."

"This has nothing to do with blood magic."

"I know, but being that close to the Wilds made the people there jumpy. They saw witches in ever shadow. I think Leigh was the most upset that we had to stop celebrating the Hallow. The Revered Mother told her she had to use the day after as her Name Day." Sebastian took off his mask and had a pained expression on it.

"Why?"

"She told Leigh that anyone born on the Hallow was cursed and it would be better is she never acknowledged that was her Name Day."

"I am a brother in the Chantry and I do not see the harm in this at all. The children had a grand time and so have we."

"The Chantry didn't like the fact that people offered prayers to spirits and lost loved ones Sebastian, that's why it was banned. It was out of fear and ignorance." Leigh stood in the doorway with her arms crossed over her chest. "I'm not saying every Chantry is like that, but Lothering was. It got better when the old mother died and the new one took her place, but it was still hard to celebrate my Name Day without raising some eyebrows."

"I am truly sorry they made the day of your birth so evil. You are a shining light in Kirkwall Hawke."

"Thank you, now...Maker's breath!" She saw Anders finally when she stepped around Sebastian to go into the party. He was wearing the mask of the hawk. It looked identical to the one her father had worn so many years ago. Had she not seen his honey brown eyes she would have sworn it was her father. "Love is that you?"

"Yes, I was sure the feathers would have given it away. I should be asking if that is you under that mask."

"Do you like it?"

"I swear you will be the death of me woman, but yes I do like it." He gave her one of his smiles that turned her insides to jelly. She knew what he was thinking and she aimed to please after the party. "We only have a couple of hours til midnight shall we love." He offered her his arm and she took it in kind. Sebastian and Varric followed the lovers up the stairs to the room.

"The party can start now that both the guests of honor are here!" The rest of the evening went off without a hitch. Orana played the lute and sang while Leigh and her guest danced and drank. Anders was even able to partake of some of the wine and mead since Justice was very silent. He knew he would most likely wake with a headache, but this was well worth it. He had not had this much fun since the celebration they threw at Vigil's Keep when they defeated the Mother. He was having such a good time he did not mind Leigh dancing with Sebastian or Fenris. The smile of her face was all he needed to see. He had not seen her this happy in a long time.

"May I have this dance?" Fenris nodded and handed Leigh off to Anders.

"You can dance?"

"One of my many talents you have yet to discover love. I can Waltz, do most of the Remigold and let's not forget Anders' Spicy Shimmy."

"What?"

"Sorry inside joke. That one I think you have already seen, just not in public."

"Mmm, I guess you'll have to remind me of that one later then." Leigh let out a laugh when he twirled her around the room. Orana was playing a particularly fast song and Leigh had a hard time keeping up with Anders . Once the music stopped Leigh leaned into her love and tried to catch her breath. "Damn that Warden stamina, Maker I can't breathe."

"This is revenge for that break your hip crack you made right before the battle with the Arishok. I might be older than you, but I can still run circles around you in certain things love."

"Magic being one of them." She whispered in his ear so the others could not hear her. Other than him and Merrill no one knew she was a mage. She was a rogue to them and she wanted to keep it that way. "I can't wait to give you my gift to you. I think you will like it."

"If it came from you I'm sure I love it. Just when we get home don't you dare take off that costume."

"So you do like it?"

"Woman your dressed like a cat of course I like it. Just don't let Tovis see you or he will chase you up a tree."

"I hope not, the last time I was chased up a tree it was darkspawn doing the chasing. Not fun at all."

"When was this?"

"Ostagar. I was scouting out in the Wilds and my scouting band was attacked. Just two of us survived the attack. I was lucky they never touched me."

"Did they get bored and leave? Normally darkspawn don't give up unless there was some other prey more easily accessed." Anders expression turned dark as he realized he would never had known her if the darkspawn had got their tainted claws on her.

"The Grey Wardens saved me."

"Too bad I can't thank them for saving the love of my life."

"I don't know if they survived or not, Flemeth told us two survived I hope it was one of the four I met."

"What did they look like?"

"One was a knight, the other a thief, a warrior with a Templar shield, but not the armor and a woman with a painted face." Anders head snapped up and he smiled. He knew it was Raven and Alistair who helped save her.

"Well two of them did survive love. The Templar is now king of Ferelden and the woman was my Warden Commander. She saved my life too." Leigh wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him deeply.

"Hey you two time for your gifts." Anders growled at the pirate who was standing in the shadows watching them. "Come on there will plenty of time for fun later." The group gathered around the fireplace and sat down . Anders sat down and Leigh nestled herself down between his legs and leaned back on his chest. She had already received Bethany and Cullen's gift which she was wearing. Aveline was the first to bring up her gifts to the two.

"Donnic and I hope you like these, we got them in Orlais." Leigh took her work knife and cut the twine holding the pretty cloth on the gifts. She found to small figurines one of a mage the other of a rogue. It looked like someone took the time to painstakingly paint them to look like Anders and herself. "Donnic painted them."

"Thank you both so much. How did you get all those little details?"

"Very small brushes and a lot of patience." Next was Merrill and Leigh let Anders open this one. He took the gift and tore the parchment paper off. He found a book under the paper. It was very old and ratty looking, but as he flipped through the pages a smile crept on his face.

"Do you like it? I was afraid it was too old for you to want it, but you are so hard to find a gift for. If you don't like it I could get you something else..."

"Merrill it is perfect." Leigh looked up at him and quirked her eyebrow up in question. "It is a old spell book used by Keepers to help teach Dreamers how to control their power and how to deter demons. I can read it and write to Fenryial to help him out." Merrill winked at Leigh who nodded and smiled. Fenris handed Leigh a bottle wrapped in fabric. Anders snickered knowing it was wine since Fenris liked drinking with Leigh when she was helping him with his reading lessons.

"Thank you Fenris what vintage is it?"

"It is apple cider made this morning. I know Anders does not normally partake in alcohol so I wanted to give you something you both could enjoy."

"I haven't had apple cider in forever, thank you Fenris." Isabela winked and handed hers over to Anders. He gave her a apprehensive look before opening the box. It was a set of clothing for each of them. A well tailored shirt, vest and breeches for him and a silvery dress gown for Leigh. He noticed there were other clothes under the dress clothes, but he left them there hidden."

"I just thought just in case you wanted to take Anders to one of those stuffy noble parties. And the other things are for after, or before, or whenever."

"I might have to except one of those invitations to one of those stuffy parties just to see you in those clothes love."

"Maker help me." Sebastian stepped forward handing Leigh and Anders both a box of their own. "Is this going to explode in my face?" Sebastian just grinned and motioned for Anders to open his gift. Anders blew out a puff of breath and pulled the ribbon holding the box closed. He closed his eyes and opened the the box. When it didn't explode he slowly opened one eye to see what was in it. Inside the velvet lined box was a carved ring of amber just like the color of his eyes. Leigh opened hers and found one made of moonstone.

"They say a person's eyes are the window to their souls. I saw them and thought of both of you."

'Their beautiful Sebastian." Leigh stood up and hugged her rogue friend. "Thank you." He kissed her cheek and whispered.

"Your quite welcome." Varric was last but not least. He handed both of them a piece of parchment and the two lovers looked at each other and then to him.

"Just read them." Leigh and Anders read over the parchments. Leigh covered her mouth and started to cry. "You two are getting two weeks off to be by yourselves to do whatever you want. We will handle Kirkwall for you Hawke and Bethany will be covering the Clinic while Cullen watches over her for Anders."

"But I thought you were going to Starkhaven?"

"I lied so not to ruin the surprise. After what you went through this past year I think you two deserve to have some peace and quiet." Leigh jumped up and hugged her sister and Cullen. Then she went over to Varric and hugged him tightly too. "I just hope I can heal as good as Anders does."

"You will do fine Beth and most of the families down there know you from the help you gave me after I first met you two. I trust you to take care of them all."

"If you need anything Sunshine just let me know and I will get it for you."

"Thank you Varric." The sound of the Chantry bell tolling signaled that midnight had arrived. As much as Leigh did not want the night to end, she knew it was time to head home. Aveline and Donnic took their leave first having patrols in the early morning. Sebastian was next to go followed by Varric and Merrill. Isabela was staying with Fenris for the night. Bethany and Cullen were also staying with the elf at least for the night to give the two lovebirds time alone. Anders and Leigh were the last to leave and head home.

OoO

The night air was so still while they walked home in the moonlight. Leigh was deep in thought about what to do for the two weeks alone with Anders. They had been together for almost six months, but with all that had gone on during those months it was hard to get much time alone. The passion was still hot as ever, but she wanted more than just that. She wanted to know him inside and out and wanted him to know the same about her. She hoped these two weeks would help accomplish this.

"You alright love?" His voice broke her out of her thoughts. She smiled and leaned into him while they walked.

"Just thinking about what I am going to do with you for two weeks."

"Good thoughts I hope."

"Most of them involve our bed love so yes very good thoughts."

"I like how you think." He pulled her hard against him and crushed her lips with his. The kiss went on til they were breathless. "Maker's breath your like a drug."

"I give you the shakes and make you loopy?"

"I can't get enough of you and I ache if I am deprived of your presence for more than a day."

"I feel the same way. Those three years..."

"I know I was such a fool and I will do whatever it takes to make up for my stupidity, starting tonight." He swept Leigh up into his arms and carried her home. He was thankful Bodhan had stayed up long enough to let them in before retiring to bed. Leigh wiggled to get out of Anders' arms so they could walk up the stairs together, but he did not let her out of his arms.

"Love there is no way you can carry me up those stairs."

"Now I have to prove to you I can. I am not some Circle mage who couldn't fight his way out of a wet parchment bag."

"I know that, but..."

"Hush woman and let me do this." Leigh bit her lip and let him take her up the stairs. Anders climb the stairs without any effort at all. Once he crossed the threshold of their room he set her down and locked the door.

"You are always full of surprises love." He took off his mask and gave her a predatory smile before curling his finger to beckon her toward him.

"Here kitty, kitty." Leigh gave him a smirk and stretched her arms over her head so her back arched like that of a cat's.

"Cat's don't come when called love." He growled rushing forward to pin her to the wall. Leigh giggled and tilted her head to the side to give him access to her throat. Her legs felt like jelly like they did every time he got forceful. She enjoyed this side of him every once in a while. She let out a moan as he plucked the soft flesh of her neck with his teeth. "If I knew I would have gotten this reaction I would have dressed up like a cat long before this."

"I am more partial to tabbies, but by the Maker I love the little black cat in front of me right now."

"Me...ow"

"Meow indeed." Leigh felt his fingers run down her spine over the silken fabric. He felt three tie points on the skin tight shirt she was wearing. He knew she was flexible, but not that flexible. "How did you get this on without help?"

"I tied the first two ties and put it on then tied the last one." He smiled against her neck and started untying the knots.

"Not wearing a breast band either. You are such a little minx."

"I know how much you hate obstacles so I thought I would take some away."

"Some?" Leigh just giggled and Anders groaned. He pulled her from the wall to their bed. "Your in trouble now love."

"I like trouble." He smiled and laid her down. Their clothes flew off and bodies entwined. The only sounds that could be heard was the crackling of the fire and soft moans.

OoO

Leigh woke up sometime during the night and heard someone moving in the house. She looked over at Anders and saw he was fast asleep. She gently got out of the bed and went to the main room. She saw Tovis standing in front of the main fire place wagging his tail. She wondered what he was looking at since he was facing away from her. He barked and went back to his bed. Leigh saw a apparition move through the room and stop at the stairs looking at her. It began to take shape and Leigh just smiled.

"Happy Name Day my darling little girl."

"I miss you Mama."

"I miss you too. So does your father."

"Tell him I said hello and I love him, Carver too.

"I will, but you can tell Carver yourself when you see him next." Anders walked up behind Leigh and wrapped his arms around her. "You keep your promise to me young man a take care of my daughter."

"If she lets me." Leandra shook her head and laughed. "I will keep my promise Leandra. She is the most important thing in my life. I'd be lost without her."

"And she without you. My time is up. Leigh protect what you hold dear and never give into despair. You are your father's daughter. Anders don't let your hatred rule you and find peace in your life. You have so much to look forward to." With her last words Leandra vanished.

"Mama wait what did you mean I could tell Carver myself?" Her mothers form had disappeared, but her voice echoed through the house.

"You will see dear in time." Leigh looked back at Anders and he shrugged his shoulders. He didn't know what she meant either.

"First my grandmother and now my mother. I guess they are right this is the night for the Veil to be thin. Maybe that is what she meant, my brother might cross the Veil and come talk to me."

"Maybe, at least I wasn't the only one to get ghostly visits. Mine was the woman who died earlier in the day. She told me to get off my ass and get to the party."

"So that's why you were there."

"It was my party too love, it would have been in poor taste not to show up."

"I was so glad you did show. It was nice to have everyone there."

"I have a bone to pick with Sebastian though."

"Maker what now?"

"The rings he gave us, mine is way to small. It doesn't fit any finger but my pinky."

"That is because yours was meant for me and mine was meant for you. It is a way for us to have something to remember each other if we are ever parted for more than a day."

"Now I feel like an ass. It still surprised me though, coming from him. I know he don't like me at all."

"He doesn't have to love, I'm the only one you have to worry about and I love you completely. Justice and all."

"And I love you. Come back to bed love."

"That sounds like a good idea and since neither of us have to do anything important tomorrow I think we should sleep in."

"Who said we were sleeping? You never gave me my gift."

"I thought I did earlier, you know after we got home." Leigh winked at him before nudging him with elbow genlty.

"While that was a wonderful gift I thought you said you had something for me?"

"I do, but it is kind of silly."

"Now you have to show me what it is."

"If you laugh I swear to the Maker I will not cook for you the entire two weeks we are here."

"You are so wicked love. I promise I won't laugh."

"Okay, let me go get it." Anders waited patiently on their bed when Leigh walked back through the door with a odd shaped gift. She handed it to him and stepped back biting her lower lip. He loved when she did that , to him it was the sexiest thing in the world. He unwrapped the gift and had to bit down on his own lip to stop from laughing. "I know you would have preferred a real one, but Tovis would have eaten it."

"You got me a stuffed kitten?"

"Correction, I made you a stuffed kitten." He turned it over and saw the hand stitching underneath and grinned. The kitten was made of strong fabric dyed to look like a orange tabby. It's eyes were made out of polished tigereyes and it's nose was a small pink button. Leigh had also stitched a line of red for the mouth and used small feather quills as whiskers. For once he was struck speechless. "Do you like it?"

"I love it. It looks just like Ser Pounce A Lot. I didn't know you were crafty."

"I lived on a farm most of my life I had to do something to keep boredom away. My mother was always very good at making clothes and toys for us. I learned from her. Not bad for a nobleman's daughter huh?"

"Not bad at all. I should put this up so our dear mutt doesn't think it is a chew toy."

"Good idea, that thing is stuffed with feathers. I really don't want them all over the house or worse." Anders cringed getting her meaning. Dogs eating feathers did not sound pleasant to him. Anders rose from the bed and went to his wardrobe. He returned with a box covered in runes. "You locked it?"

"I live with an Arcane Trickster, don't give me that look, you my dear woman are nosy. So yes I locked it." He waved his hands over the box and the runes faded away. "Happy Name Day love. Leigh opened the box and her eyes lit up. He had fixed her old amulet. The stone that replaced the old one was one she had never seen before.

"What kind of stone is this?"

"It is called Andraste's Tears or opal if you are not Chantry raised. It is to bring those born on the Hallow luck and a long life. Both of which I wish for you love always."

"As long as that long life is with you I will be the luckiest girl in all of Thedas."

"And here I thought I was the lucky one." Leigh threw her arms around his neck and pulled him down into a passionate kiss. "I can see I am going to be very worn out these next two weeks."

"You will enjoy it and you know it."

"You know I do."

**Okay this went way longer than I first intended, but here it is. I know it does not fit in the story line, so please forgive me. I just needed a small break from all the fighting and the drama to write something lighthearted. I hope you enjoyed it. Thanks as always for reading. Happy Halloween!**

**Raven **


	31. Chapter 31

Varric was yelling, but Leigh had her attention on Janeka. Her blood boiled with rage at the Warden mage. A small part of her knew the woman was enthralled by Corypheus, but it did not stop her from wanting the Warden dead. No one hurt her family and got away with it. Cullen listened to Leigh's orders and hung back out of the fight since his armor was all but useless from the Revenant's blow. Bethany stood behind him casting heal spells. Ori and Carver worked together to defeat their foes. She would freeze them and he would shatter them. Anders stayed close to Leigh making sure no one touched her. She was still not at full strength from the nightshade she had used on herself. Her movements were slowed considerably. Larius was being covered by Varric while he fought his fellows. Leigh had chosen to stand with him even after hearing what he had done to her father. Making sure Corypheus stayed bound was more important than taking any kind of action against the man who threatened her mother's life years ago.

"I just need your blood Hawke I don't care how I get it."

"Sorry to disappoint you, but I like my blood where it is." Leigh threw out her hands and hit Janeka with a spirit bolt. The older woman screamed and fell to her knees. "Not nice to be on the receiving end is it?"

"Your a fool. He could stop the Blights, bring peace to Thedas."

"Darkspawn don't want peace they want to corrupt the world. Make us all like them. I prefer to not be made into a monster." Janeka tried to get to her feet, but Leigh rushed at her and sliced her throat clean to the bone. "I will not let him get free." Her body shook from fatigue and anger as she watched the life's blood drain from the woman. The sounds of battle died away, leaving a eerie quiet. The binding spells were still up, but only just.

"Everyone still in one piece?"

"I think so Varric." Leigh turned to Larius who was staring at seal in the middle of the room. He sighed and looked up at Leigh.

"You have to break the binding spells."

"If I do that he will get free. I thought you wanted him to stay put?"

"I do, but to get you here you have to break the binding seals to get out of here. You will have to fight him." Anders stepped forward and snarled at the Warden.

"Why, can't you just re-bind the seals?"

"They have never been broken before only reenforced. He could free himself before we could get them made again. You said you faced one like him before, you know how dangerous they are."

"I do, but we are in no condition to fight him. Most of us are exhausted!"

"And he is not at full strength, you can beat him."

"No! I will not risk it!" Leigh placed a hand on Anders' arm to calm him seeing Justice trying to take control. The blue glow just got brighter and Larius backed up.

"Love, please stop. We don't have a choice. He can't be unleashed on the world. Both you and Justice know this."

"We will not let you fight him." Justice took Leigh's hand and stared into her eyes. His expression was pained. "We can not lose you."

"I know, but this is bigger than me or Pash, Justice. He has to be dealt with now before he destroys all we hold dear."

"He is too dangerous for you to fight not when your..." Leigh's finger silenced the spirit.

"If we don't stop him now there won't be a safe place to raise them."

"Then we will stand with you and protect you."

"I would not have it any other way." Blue eyes shifted back to amber brown. Anders leaned his forehead against hers and sighed.

"Maker your stubborn."

"I'm not going to change love." He nodded and kissed her brow. "Larius how do we break the binding spells?"

"Each statue has a chalice with a rune ward on it. Dispel the ward and it will break the binding. Then you have to use your blood to free him."

"Leigh, you and Bethany break the wards, I will be the one to give my blood. I'm not mage so it won't effect me like it would you two." Carver stepped forward with a look of determination.

"Go stand near the seal then, but don't do anything before I tell you to. I want to be right up on this bastard when he comes out. If we are lucky we can finish him off quickly."

"Whatever you say sister just hurry it up. I would like to go home sometime soon, like in the next decade."

"You know I really missed my sarcastic little brother so much."

"You did and you know it."

"More than you will even know Carver. Just be ready." He nodded and stepped over to the seal. He could hear his heart pounding in his ears. He watched his sisters as they worked their magic to undo the wards. It was strange to see how much they had changed, yet stayed the same. Bethany was much stronger than she had been since he had last seen her, but she was still just as caring. Leigh if possible was much more a protector of her friends and family. A small sense of pride ran through him at this though. As much as he and Leigh butted heads when they were younger he knew his sister would prevail against anything thrown her way. Their father would have been proud of all of them. He felt the last ward drop and the turned to see Leigh standing right next to him. She still could sneak up on him. "Ready?"

"No, but let's get this over with."

"I'm right here behind you." He nodded and smiled before stepping up to the seal. He took out his work dagger and brought it to his forearm. He paused for a second and looked back at his older sister. She nodded at him telling him it would be alright. He took a deep breath and let the dagger drag across his skin. His face twisted into a grimace, but he dug the dagger deeper to bring forth his blood. The stream of crimson ran down the side of his arm and hit the seal. A bright light formed in the middle of the seal and Carver could have sworn he heard someone whisper for him to put the sword into the light. His hands shook as he took the sword off his back and placed it in the stream of light. At first nothing happened, but then he felt his body get knocked back and fly through the air. He barely missed crashing into his sister who was coming up to his side. He landed over ten feet away with a loud clang, his sword landed just with in his reach. When he looked up at the seal his blood ran cold. Rising from the seal came a form more monster than man. He scrambled to his feet and pushed his sister behind him.

"Be these dwarven lands, why their roads seem so empty?" Leigh shared a look with Anders who shrugged his shoulders. "You there are you in the service of Dumat? If so take me to the first acolyte, I wish to speak with him."

"He seems a bit confused."

"He has slept this whole time. He does not know how much time has passed."

"Then how did he know to control Anders and how does he know about us?"

"He can hear things through the Taint, but it is a surface knowledge nothing more. He does not know names or places."

"Wonderful." Leigh stepped around her brother to confront the emissary. Corypheus stared at her with black hateful eyes. He could feel the power rolling off her as she could feel his.

"Are you a magister?"

"No."

"Yet you have followers. Tell me this why have you come here?"

"I came to stop you."

"You have no chance. I am a high priest to Dumat. He promised us the light. We went and sot it out, but it has been nothing but darkness and corruption even since."

"The light?"

"He promised us power and the golden light. We marched on the city, but were turned back. Cursed to the darkness ever since."

"_He is referring to the attack on the Maker's Golden City. He and his fellow mages marched to dethrone the Maker at Dumat's behest. They were stop just shy of the gates by the spirits. Dozens of spirits lost their lives. In the end only eight of us remained and most of us were gravely injured. The Maker took pity on us and banished him and his followers. Cursing them for their pride and lust for power. Thus the darkspawn were born. A reminder of what too much power can do. Corypheus was like you gifted, but he lacked the patients or the control you have."_

"You are what held me here, I can smell the blood in you."

"And I can see you have not changed since you decided to march on the Maker's city."

"The city was ours. The Maker had turned his back on us. Dumat gave us hope and purpose."

"You were duped." A vicious snarl came from the ancient mage. "Don't growl at me, I didn't make you choose to waste you life. You chose to do that. I'm just here to make sure you don't go any further than this."

"You are weak and know nothing of true power."

"I don't want power. I am nothing like you."

"Oh but you are."

"I will never do what you did."

"If you will not help me leave this place, I will go through you to leave."

"You can try." Leigh backed up motioning to the others to do the same. She felt Anders hand on her back keeping to his and Justice's word that he would stay right beside her. "Scatter!"

"I will brook no rival mortal." He rose up higher in the air and blasted them all with a spirit bolt. Anders jumped in front of Leigh taking the hit meant for her. He fell to his knees and tried to heal himself. "You, you are the one who fail me. You will be the first to die." The emissary pointed his long boney finger at the blonde mage and sent a strong spell toward him. Leigh rushed forward and batted away the spell.

"Leave him alone! I will rip you apart if you do that again!" Corypheus just laughed and set his sights on one of her other companions. With his focus on someone else Leigh hit him hard with a stonefist knocking him to the ground. "You fight me bastard! Carver get Anders and the others under cover now!" Her brother ran forward and hauled Anders to his feet, pulling him back to one of the griffon statues that marked the four corners of the room.

"Sister run!" Leigh shook her head and kept her eyes on the darkspawn. She was not about to back down now.

"You would stand alone against me? You have no chance to win." Leigh unsheathed her daggers and twirled them in her fingers.

"You will find I am full of surprises. Now shut up and fight!" She ran at him stopping just short of meeting him face to face. She vanished in a puff of smoke leaving Corypheus confused.

"You run like frightened mouse. Coward!" He did not hear her behind him, but felt the strike of her blades in his sides. He hissed and swatted at her. Leigh back flipped just out of his reach. "Tricky are we?"

"You'll find out." She disappeared again this time she joined her friends to make sure they were alright. "Love?"

"I'm fine, he blocked the way out we're trapped."

"Shit, where is Larius?"

"He got caught outside of the barrier."

"Just fucking great."

"I'll draw his attention from you so you can get him."

"I don't think so. He'll make mince meat out of you. I'm not willing to let that happen."

"You can't fight him alone. I will not lose you or our children."

"Hide all you like mortal, I will find you!" Leigh peered around the wall and saw Corypheus raise his hands toward the sky. "Dumat grant me your power!" A beam of fire jumped from one of the griffon statues and was absorbed through his hands. "Let the fire consume you!"

"Son of a bitch..." A jet of flame shot from either hand as he spun in place. It reached the far wall of the room and moved along. One jet was dangerously close to where they were hiding. Leigh jumped up and threw a shield spell over her companions. "Stay in the orb!" With that she ran out of hiding just ahead of the fire. She skirted into one of the other alcoves and saw the statue pulsing. She touched where the wards had been and she felt the power of rock and earth surge through her. "_Use the power to combat him." "I need ice for that to work." "It is back were your companions are hiding_." "_Figures." _She waited for the next jet of fire to pass to run to the next alcove. Each time she touched the power fount it weakened his fire. She did this two more times to get to the ice fount. "Alright new plan everyone touch the statue and gain the power of ice. We will hit him all together." Anders jumped to his feet and took her hand. They touched it together drawing the power it possessed. The others did the same.

"Bianca is not sure she likes being covered in ice."

"Well it is that or being burned to a crisp Varric."

"Point taken, Hawke you and Blondie break one way we will go the other."

'Just watch the flames." She timed it and yelled. "GO!" Leigh and her companions scattered. Cullen used his shield to cover Bethany from the flames. Varric let off a hail of arrows at the darkspawn. Carver tried to find an opening to strike while his wife cast ice spells at the creature. Leigh and Anders ran hand in hand to the far side of the room. "He is weakening."

"We have to take him down now." Leigh nodded and let her magic mingle with that of her love's. Anders gasped at the feeling. He felt like the power was going to cause him to burst.

"Don't fight it, let it strengthen your magic." He closed his eyes and concentrated once he was sure he could handle the power he nodded. "Ready?"

"Yes." He held out the hand that was not entwined with her and let loose a ball of ice that hit the darkspawn square in the face. "Take that you bastard!" Leigh smiled and threw her own spell catching Corypheus in the shoulder.

"Perhaps a little something more." The darkspawn blinked out of sight and appeared right behind the lovers.

"Watch out!" Anders pushed Leigh out of the way before she was hit from behind. "Leave her alone you son of a bitch!" Justice fueled Anders spells now that he was not longer in touching contact with Leigh. He snarled at the twisted mage and charged. His staff cracked against his foes face sending him reeling to the ground. Before he could hit again Corypheus again the monster vanished only to reappear back in the middle of the room his hands raised to the sky again. "He's at it again!"

"I'm really getting tired of this." The ground under their feet began to shake. Suddenly rocks started jutting up from the ground creating a maze around the room.

"Oh, that's not nice." Varric and the others had made their way back to Leigh's side. "If he pulls a dragon out of his ass I'm leaving."

"How do we get through that?" Again Corypheus began to spin, fire still coming from his hands. Carver cursed loudly. "Bloody hell, how...we can't win this!"

"Yes we can!"

"How Leigh? He keeps drawing power from those statues."

"So can we, now stay here under cover and I will be back. Be ready." Leigh vanished again through the maze of rock.

"Maker I really hate when she does that." Bethany put her hand on her brother's arm. Her face was a mask of worry. "I guess she hasn't changed at all, huh?"

"No if anything she has gotten worse." Carver sighed.

"Can anyone see where she is?" They all shook their heads to Cullen's question. They could only tell where she had been by the flashes in the alcoves. "I see her!" Leigh had jumped up on one of the rock formations so she could face the darkspawn again.

"She's a bloody sitting duck out there. What is she thinking?" Varric turned around to see if Anders was hyperventilating and found he was missing.

"We have another problem. Blondie's gone."

"Balls! Leave it to my sister to pick a man with no sense in his head."

"Blondie has sense, just isn't very stealthy. He is trying to get ugly's attention off your sister so she can kick his ass." A strong bolt of lightning hit the darkspawn square in the chest. It came from the opposite direction Leigh was standing. Corypheus turned to face his attacker only to be pummeled by stonefist after stonefist from Leigh. With his attention divided Ori and Bethany took the opportunity to throw their own spells at the creature. Varric leveled Bianca and took a few shots as well. "Andraste's tits when is he going to drop!"

"Keep shooting he can't take hits like this forever."

"Easy for you to say Junior your just sitting here watching us do all the work."

"If I could get the to bastard I would cut his bloody head off, but it is hard, since he floats." Varric gave a chuckle and kept shooting.

"I will crush you all!" Leigh could hear the fear in Corypheus' voice.

"Not if we crush you first!" Again he vanished and set himself behind Anders.

"She will hear your dying screams." He loomed over the blonde mage who had nowhere to go. Anders readied himself for a hit that never came. The clang of metal hitting off the darkspawn's back as Cullen slammed him with his shield. The Templar followed it with his sword leaving a nasty gash on the emissary's chest. With a hiss Corypheus floated back to the seal in the center of the room.

"Thanks."

"Not all Templars are prigs Anders."

"I never said they were, just most of them." Cullen sighed and pushed Anders forward with his shield. The group could only watch as he sucked power out of the last two statues. "Maker this is not going to be good.

"You are strong, but not strong enough. This ends now!" The wind outside of the howled and a storm kicked up. "What in the Void is he doing?" Leigh felt the power surge before all hell broke loose. She had just enough time to put a barrier up between her friends and the onslaught that Corypheus unleashed. The rock maze became a death trap. Electricity arched through the rock making it nearly impossible to get through. Ice shards fell from the sky trying to impale anyone they fell on and the fire he had shooting from fingers became larger and longer. The storm that surrounded the tower was what was worrying Leigh.

"Shit, shit, shit, shit! He is trying to shatter part of the Veil!"

"That's impossible!"

"No really it's not, just bloody hard to do. If we don't stop him we are all going to get sucked into the Fade."

"So what we battle him there and come back to our bodies when we win." Leigh shot Varric a look and shook her head.

"If that happens Varric we will be dead. Justice and Pash might survive it, but we won't. I have to stop him. Once the Veil shatters there will be no stopping demons from taking over Thedas. The hole will get larger and larger til there is nothing left." This is one of the only few times Leigh has ever seen her dwarven friend speechless. It did not do much for her confidence.

"Going out there is suicide love, I won't..."

"Can you close tears in the Veil?" Anders shook his head and looked down at the ground. "Keep hitting him, distract him. I have to call in a favor."

"Wait, what?" Leigh kept the barrier up to protect them, but ran out of it into the maze. She found a quiet corner in which to do what she had to do. She found a small rip in the fabric of reality already forming, threatening to break wide open.

"_Alright Pash this is your game, you call them." "Be ready." "I really don't have much choice, do I?" "No, we don't"_ Leigh raised her hands to the tear and sent out a pulse of pure light into it. "Maker let this work."

OoO

"Do you feel that?"

"Feel what Blondie?"

"It feels like..." Anders pitched forward to his knees. He let out a ear piercing scream and fell limp to the ground. Ori fell to the ground and flipped him over checking to see if he was breathing.

"Anders! Anders, wake up. You have to wake up!" Carver caught a glint out of the corner of his eye and wheeled around sword at the ready.

"Holy Maker what are you?"

"I am Justice." Standing in front of them was a silvery well armored spirit. His eyes glowed blue just like Anders' did when Justice took over. "He will be alright once the Veil is closed. Guard him."

"I thought you were one person?"

"We are Varric. It is the call of others I must heed and his body will not survive if it goes out there."

"Others, what others?" Justice pointed out into the room. It was hard to see with all the lightning and the ice, but the silver forms were unmistakable. "Holy Shit!"

"This is a battle we have fought before, but this time we have help." Justice turned and walked toward the center seal. Four other spirits fell in step with him. Two were well armored and the other two were in robes. "We are to keep the Veil from tearing apart. Compassion and Hawke will deal with the magister."

"Hope protect the mortals." The young looking spirit nodded her head and went to stand next to Leigh's friends. She weaved a spell through her hands and set a barrier far stronger than the one that Leigh put in place.

"Stay in the bubble, you will be safe." Her voice was light and airy, that of a adolescent, not a woman.

'What about my sister? She can't survive out there." Hope gave Bethany a reassuring smile and patted her arm. Bethany could feel the spark of energy in that touch.

"She is well protected." A groan from behind them told that Anders was waking up.

"Maker, what happened, my head feels like Carver split it in two?" He stood up and saw the spirit standing next to Bethany. "Who...?"

"I am called Hope." Anders called out to Justice in his mind and found he was not answering. "He is not there to answer you."

"What do you mean he is not there?" Hope pointed out into the room and Anders gaze followed her finger to a figure he remembered from years ago. The spirit's helmet was missing, but he knew it was Justice. "How? We were joined, there is no undoing that."

"It is not undone. The tears in the Veil has made this place equal part Fade and reality. Here he and you can be separate."

"Where is Leigh?"

"She is out there with the others, they will protect her. Though I doubt she needs to be. She is strong." Anders tried to push passed the spirit to get out into the room, but her firm hand held him back. "You will not be helping if you go out there. Justice and Compassion are with her, she will be fine."

"Did she bring you all here?"

"Yes and no, we heeded the call of our sister. This battle is one we know well."

"I don't understand?"

"We have faced him before."

"This I have to hear." Varric stepped up next to Anders and the spirit, curious about the story.

"He marched on the home of our father. We were the only thing stand between them and the gate. Dozens of us...did not survive. In the end eight of us were left standing, but...our sister was gravely injured. She succumb to her injuries shortly after they were banished from the Fade. Compassion took it the worst of us."

"They were friends?"

"Sisters, mortal born turned spirits. Twins to be exact, at least that is what we were told."

"So both were spirits of Compassion?"

"No the other sister was a spirit of Courage." Realization hit Anders from what he had read on those old scrolls Ashlyn had given him. One sister a mage, the other a Templar. Both warriors in their own rights, but on different sides til one talked sense into the other.

"Pash was the mage sibling and her sister the Templar."

"Yes, I am surprised she told you what she is, she is not one to talk about it."

"She didn't a friend of mine found the account of their tale and had it translated back into common. She found them in the Temple of Andraste."

"The last resting place, I see. Your friend must have been worthy indeed to find that place and survive it."

"She is one of a kind." Anders felt a low buzzing in his head and threw up mental wall to keep the darkspawn out. He would not be controlled again. "_I will make sure she is safe Anders." "Justice?" "Yes, my friend. We are still connected." "You sound different." "I am free of your anger and fear if only for a little while. Even if it isn't always present I can feel it." "I..." "We will have to work on controlling it_."

"He is talking to you, yes?"

"Yes."

"You are worried."

"Of course I am worried, the woman I love is out there fighting that thing. It is bad enough her own life is in jeopardy, but also the lives of our unborn children too."

"She would not be out there if it was not important to stop him. His mind has become twisted with sin and pride. He thinks himself a god, a ruler of man. Hawke is more than a match for him."

"I hope your right."

OoO

"Courage, Leigh he can not harm you." Corypheus tried unsuccessfully again and again to break pass the barrier wall the spirits had put around Leigh, Justice and Pash. The three stood shoulder to shoulder waiting for him to tire enough to finish him off. Leigh flinched with ever bombardment on the glowing shield.

"He looks pissed."

"He is afraid."

"Oh good it's not just me then." Pash chuckled darkly and Justice shook his head.

"You can defeat him."

"What are the others doing?"

"Sealing the tears save one so they can return home. Justice and I will go back into you and Anders when it is done."

"Guess there is not way to change spirits is there?"

"You mean I go with Anders and Justice with you?" Leigh nodded, but never took her eyes off the livid magister in front of them. "I wish it were so, but it must stay the way it is."

"Just wanted to check, though having a man's voice inside my head would take getting use to. No offense Justice."

"None taken." Seeing his face was strange to Leigh. She had only ever seen him with a helmet on or with Anders' face. He was not what she was expecting. "Ah he is tiring finally. We should get ready."

"_Leigh when the barrier drops hit him with your best shot. He will be expecting magic, use your daggers. He is not immortal." "Got it."_

"NOW!" Justice and Pash dropped the shield around them. Leigh felt the absence of reality when it fell and had to take a second to get her barrings. Corypheus threw a fire ball at her and she back flipped over it. She heard Anders scream for her to watch out as the darkspawn tried casting again. With the grace of a master duelist Leigh spun in the air and struck her opponent across the chest with both daggers. Corypheus fell to his knees and watched his blood wash over his hands.

"Time for you to die." He snarled at Leigh and lunged for her. She was ready for him and imbedded her dagger in his skull. The blood that arched from the wound was deflected by Justice's shield.

"Best not to let it touch you."

"No arguments here." With his death the room returned to normal. The rock formations crumbled to dust and the storm left as quickly as it came. All that remained were the spirits that had been called by Pash. Leigh saw only one tear left in the Veil where the others were gathering. She willed her feet to move so she could join her friends. All her adrenaline was gone, leaving her shaky and exhausted. She felt Pash and Justice take her arms and put them over their shoulders to help her along. She saw Hope standing next to Anders smiling back at her. She gave a weak smile and let her eyes close for a moment. The feeling of a warm embrace made her eyes open.

"Love are you alright, are you hurt anywhere?"

"No just bloody tired." She nuzzled his neck and wanted nothing more than to fall asleep right there.

"You have to close this behind us before you rest Hawke." Leigh groaned at the spirit of Fortitude. "You are the only one that can."

"Alright, alright no rest for the weary I get it. Maker I don't remember you all being so pushy."

"You were not normally this exhausted when we would see you in the Fade and you were a lot younger."

"Is it bad for a spirit to call you old?"

"You are not old Hawke, just older than the last time we saw you."

"Hmm..." Anders had to hold her up so she could stand.

"She needs rest."

"We are leaving soon." Hope turned to Pash and Justice and embraced them both. "It is good to see you both again."

"And you."

"Hope we must leave the air here is thinning. Our time is up."

"Maker guide you both."

"Maker guide us all." The four spirits went through the tear and Leigh waved her hand to close it. Pash and Justice faded back into their hosts.

"Well that went smoothly."

"Varric I am way too tired to smack you right now."

"It is never boring around you Hawke, you can smack me later."

"Count on it."

OoO

The journey back to Kirkwall was uneventful much to everyone's relief. The Hawke siblings spent the time catching up and hearing stories of the others exploits. Leigh was happy to see that time had tempered her hotheaded younger brother. She wished her mother was alive to see him walk through the door of the estate, but she wasn't. At least Aveline would be surprised. When the gates of the city came into view Leigh stopped dead in the road. Bethany noticed and went back to her sister.

"Sister what's wrong?"

"It's nothing Beth, just...how can it look so peaceful from here, yet be so...oppressive within."

"Everything looks quiet from far away."

"I guess I am a little scared to leave it. I'm stalling, part of me wants to stay , but I can't. There is so much pain here, so much violence."

"You have helped so many people being here. It would have been much worse without you."

"But do I want to raise a family here?"

"You kinda already did." Leigh raised a eyebrow at the younger woman. "All of your friends are your family. You have helped all of them grow beyond what they were when we met them."

"Your right. I would not be where I am without them."

"And them where they are without you. I might have been taken to the Circle, but I learned so much and found Cullen. I was meant to be there."

"I just wish it hadn't been..."

"It is what it is Leigh. I am heading back home and will be mostly free. I have you to thank for that."

"What are big sisters for?"

"Come on last one to the gates buys."

"That's not fair I can't drink remember."

"You can have cider or are you scared I will beat you?"

"Your on little sister. One, two, three, GO!" Both women blurred passed the rest of the group trying to beat the other to the gate. Bethany had a strong lead, but could not keep up the pace. "Come on Beth, I know you can do better than that!"

"I'm a mage dammit we don't run!"

"Your the one who challenged me so pick it up and mages do run just ask Anders."

"He doesn't count." Leigh slowed her pace to that of her sister's and they both reached the gates at the same time. "You could have just beat me you know."

"It was much more fun running along side of you. Last time we did any sort of running together was with the Red Iron."

"Your right, Maker that seems like a life time ago. Now look at us, you are a noble, and me going to be a court mage. Not bad for two girls from Lothering." Once the group reached Hightown Varric bid his goodbyes for the day and went back to Lowtown to sleep. Leigh invited the rest to come stay with her and Anders at least for the night.

"My Lady, it is good to have you home."

"It is good to be home Bohdan. Please have Orana make up the two guest rooms. My sister and my brother will be staying the night, as well as their significant others."

"Of course messere, tell them to leave their soiled clothes outside the door, we will get them washed."

"It would be better to burn them. This is darkspawn blood. Bethany and Ori can borough some of my clothes, but Carver and Cullen...we will have to buy something for them."

"I will go out right away and do that for you. Ah, before I forget there is someone waiting for you in your study."

"Thanks, I will go see them. Take what ever coin you need from the desk." The dwarf bowed and went on his way. Leigh did not want visitors, but this person was already in her home, it would be rude to kick them out. She was not prepared for who she saw sitting at the desk. Queen Ashlyn Therin in all her regal glory. It surprised Leigh she did not see guards surrounding this woman.

"Your Majesty, what brings you back to Kirkwall?" Ashlyn gave Leigh an amused smile before answering.

"When the young mage and her Templar guard did not arrive at the palace I was worried Meredith went back on her word. I came to make sure she did not."

"I am sorry for making you come all the way our her Your Majesty. We had a complication. My sister was kidnapped..."

"I was informed by Warden Commander Raven what happened. I am glad to see you are all alive and well."

"Thank you."

"Ser Hawke, you are welcome to stay on the royal ship tonight if you wish."

"If I may Your Majesty I would like to stay here. My sisters and I have much catching up to do."

"Your sisters...ah, then you may stay here. The ship you came on will be ready to leave in three days. I will let you all rest."

"Queen Therin?"

"Yes,...Andrew is it?"

"Anders, Your Majesty. I was hoping to talk to you about a matter in private."

"Can it keep til morning?"

"Yes, my lady it can."

"I will meet you at the Lothering Rose then to talk in the morning." Leigh saw something she had never seen before, Anders giving a correct and honorable bow to an authoritative figure. Carver went and escorted the Queen out to where she was staying the night. He returned and hour later to new clothes and a nice steamy bath.

OoO

"The one bad thing about baths is they get cold too fast." She heard Anders give an amused sound from behind her as the both soaked their aches away in the tub.

"I could warm it up if you want?"

"Maker yes, please do." She felt the warmth flow from his hands into the water and steam started roiling off the surface. "Have to teach me that trick."

"Sure then you can go on and have baths without me."

"Never love, I enjoy having you scrub my back too much."

"And here I thought you just enjoyed my company." Leigh turned in his arms and wrapped her arms around his neck her expression was one of pure love.

"I have always enjoyed you company, and hope to enjoy it for many years to come. We have a lot to do in the next eight months to ready for these little ones."

"I still can't believe it. It is nearly impossible for Wardens to have children."

"Nathaniel and his wife had one, so did King Alistair and his wife. He was a Warden am I right?"

"Yes, I guess I just was never planning on having a family. It is odd...good, but odd."

"Are you happy?"

"I am as long as I have you." His hands slipped down her sides to her stomach and rested there. "And them. You gave me something to live for and they give me something to look forward to."

"You do know I am going to be as big as a house by the end of this right?"

"Just more of you to love." Leigh went to smack his arm, but Anders caught her hand. "Hey none of that." She leaned into closer and kissed him sweetly, pulling his lower lip out slowly between her teeth. Anders could not help the groan that escaped him.

"How bout some of this?"

"I can always go for that." He looked down at his hands and sighed. "Well we are quite pruned love. I think it is time to get out of the water."

"Your right, I just want to sink under the covers and sleep for a week." Leigh threw on her house robe and Anders dressed in a light weight shirt and cut off trousers. As they settled into bed a question came to Leigh's mind. "What did you want to talk to the Queen for?"

"I need to talk to her and Raven about me coming back to Ferelden. I still wanted for murder by the Templars there, remember?"

"So if we go back...?

"If I am caught I might just be hung. We might have to hide within the Warden ranks for a while."

"If she says you can't we will go somewhere else. It is not worth going back if they will be hunting you."

"We don't have to think about it now love, sleep. I will go talk to them in the morning, it will be alright." Leigh cuddled close to him before falling fast asleep. Anders pressed his lips to her temple and joined her in the Fade to dream.

OoO

The next morning Leigh woke to a loud commotion coming from downstairs. She reached over to wake Anders and found he was not in bed. Quickly she threw on some clothes and headed toward the noise. She could hear Tovis barking viciously at who ever was down there. Taking her daggers with her she crept to the railing of the stairs. The scene in front of her would have been comical is not for the fact her brother had Sebastian up against a wall by his neck. She saw Anders run in and tackle Fenris to stop him from hurting Carver.

"Fenris, stop!" Anders then turned to his future brother in law and yelled. "Carver for Maker's sake put him down now!"

"Why? He was sneaking in here like a thief." Leigh took this opportunity to show herself and talk down her brother.

"Carver put him down this instant!"

"Friend of yours?"

"Yes he is my friend please put him down." Carver lowered Sebastian so his feet could touch the ground, but he did not let him move away from the wall.

"Why was he sneaking in here then?"

"I wasn't sneaking, I knocked and no one answered. I found the door unlocked so I wanted to check to see if Bohdan and the others were alright."

"A likely story." Leigh rolled her eyes at her brother before pulling him away from Sebastian. She forgot just how strong her little brother could be. Sebastian had a nasty looking hand shaped red mark on his neck, but was otherwise unharmed. Leigh caught sight of Bethany and Cullen holding on to Tovis's collar to stop him from entering the fray. The hound was still straining to get at the Chantry brother and growling the whole time.

"Tovis upstairs now!" Leigh pointed and the hound slinked up the stairs with his head hung. "Maker's breath!" Orana walked in the door followed by Sandal and his father.

"Mistress is everything alright?"

"It is fine Orana. Can you please make breakfast for all of us? I am sure the rest of the crew will be showing up sooner or later."

"Yes, mistress right away." Leigh turned her attention back to her friends and her brother.

"Carver this is Sebastian Vael, formally Brother Vael of the Kirkwall Chantry and heir to Starkhaven's throne." She heard her brother curse softly under his breath and she could not help but give a small chuckle. "Sebastian this is Carver Hawke, Captain of the army in Highever and my younger brother."

"Your brother?"

"It seems his rather thick head saved him from being pummeled by an ogre."

"Thanks, Leelee, love you too."

"He was found by a few mages that survive Ostagar and nursed back to health."

"The Maker smiled on him that day."

Yes he did and on me and Bethany. I just wish..." Carver wrapped and arm around Leigh and gave her a light squeeze.

"I told you it was not your fault, I'm here now and that is all that matters. As for mother not being here, you could not have controlled that either. You take too much on your shoulders."

"Who are you and what have you done with my sour, surly brother?"

"I grew up sister. Plus I have a wife who would kick my ass if I stayed bitter." Ori just nodded and grinned.

"He's right I would."

"Well breakfast should almost be ready, shall we?" The group ushered into the dining room while Leigh went upstairs to dress in one of her better sets of clothes. Tovis was still sulking by the foot of the bed when she entered her room. She gave him a pat before dressing and going back down stairs. She saw that the rest of her companions had arrived and were all seated at the large table in the dining room. Leigh took her place next to Anders at the head of the table and waited for Orana to serve out their plates. When hers was put down in front of her she felt her stomach give a lurch. The sight of the eggs and breakfast ham made her visibly ill. Leigh jumped up from the table and ran for the door out to the courtyard. Orana stopped serving and watched her employer run out the door.

"Is she alright?" Aveline went to get up and go after Leigh, but stopped when she heard her wretch.

"Last time I saw her that green Red, she had just finished helping that boy who went to the Dalish. She eat something that didn't agree with her Blondie?"

"Not that I know of." Anders got up and went to the cupboard where he had most of his healing herbs. He pulled out some mint and a few other things to help settle her stomach. Orana looked horrified and wrung her hands in front of her. "It's alright Orana, it was nothing you did or cooked. I think she just has a upset stomach." The elf sighed with relief and finished doling out the rest of the plates. "I'll be right back."

"She's alright just trying to stop the nausea." Raven stood behind Leigh holding her hair out of the way and rubbing her back trying to be comforting.

"Raven, what...?"

"Go get her some water Anders. I'll stay with her." Leigh body shook with another bout of wretching, by now it was just mostly dry heaves. "Morning sickness is a bitch, but is does go away."

"How...how did you know?" Leigh wiped her mouth with the back of her hand as Raven helped her to a bench to sit down.

"The proud papa could not help himself. He told the Queen and I this morning."

"That's why he wasn't in bed."

"He has been granted pardon to come back home to Ferelden when ever the two of you are ready."

"The Queen is alright with letting him come back even after what he did?"

"She believes he was attacked first so he was just defending himself. He left out the part he was host to a Fade spirit, thank the Maker. He will have to hide for a while til I can take care of Addler, but it should not be for long. The Wardens will be able to do that for you."

"Til you can take care of him?"

"I...I will have to end him. It is not something I like to do, but he threatens one of my own. My Wardens are like family, we watch out for each other, protect each other. Addler joined for the wrong reasons as did Rolan. They wanted to make Anders' life miserable. Being a Warden is much more than being a warrior, rogue or mage. It is a calling, a deep seated commitment to protect Thedas."

"Your willing to kill him?"

"Yes, for more reasons than just him wanting to kill Anders. He is scum, rotten to the core."

"So I have seen and heard. I'd kill him myself, but..."

"Better I do it. Wardens can kill other Wardens under some circumstances. Being a Commander does grant me some power, if only a little." Anders had stood in the door way listening to the women talk. A grateful smile graced his lips.

"Here you go love, drink it slowly."

"Did you bring mint leaves too?" He handed them to her and she threw some in her mouth and chewed slowly. "So this happens a lot when your pregnant?"

"Mine lasted the first three months then went way till the last month. I think in that last month is was more he was taking up too much room and I was eating too much at one sitting. Wardens have a hardy appetite."

"I know I live with one. Poor Orana had a hard time keeping the larder stocked."

"You know I am standing right here, love."

"I know, just ribbing you a bit my dear. Please tell me you did not tell anyone else why I am out here wrenching?"

"Not a one and Varric is keeping his mouth shut too. I have to say I really like your brother Leigh, he stopped Sebastian in his tracks when he tried to come out and check on you."

"I told you he was protective."

"I'm waiting for him to turn on me."

"Give it time love, he is still a little bit freaked out about the fact you glow when your pissed off."

"Kettle how black thou areth."

"I think I am going to go back inside and rest. I feel awful. Raven you are more than welcome to have my plate if you want it or Orana could make you up some fresh. I...food is just not my friend today."

"Thank you, I think I will have some breakfast. Go rest Hawke, you have a long way to go yet." Anders and Leigh both grimaced and spoke in unison.

"Maker help me." All Raven could do was laugh and head inside the estate. "I'll have Orana make you some clear broth and some bread, love. I'll bring it up later."

"I just hope it stays down. I really hate throwing up."

"It will pass, I promise."

"If it doesn't I can always blame you for it."

"Yes, yes it is my fault, but it does take two love."

"I hate it when you use logic on me." Anders just laughed and helped her up to their room so she could rest. She hoped for dreamless sleep, but it was not to be.

**Thank the Maker and any other deity listening. This chapter gave me one heck of a time as did my computer. It decided it wanted to delete half of it after I spent a few hours writing it. I hope it turned out alright. There are parts I had a hard time rewriting. As always thanks for reading and a big thanks to my reviewers for letting me know you like this so far. **

**Raven**


	32. Chapter 32

_Leigh found herself standing in the Fade, surrounded by stone pillars. She knew this place well, as it was the place she went to in her dreams as a child. Here she had honed her magic under the careful eye of her father and Pash. Here she would play with the other spirits who would stop to watch her. Her childhood had been lonely in the waking world. Her family could not afford to trust the wrong people, lest they be found and her father taken from them and then later her sister. The spirits had been her only friends. It was here she felt safest, here she was at complete peace. With a wave of her hands she made the scene change into Lothering as she remembered it from when she was a child. Her heart ached a little wanting nothing more to return and take Anders with her. _

"_It does not look like this anymore Leigh." The voice made her spin around so she could come face to face with a person she had not seen since she was seventeen. _

"_Papa?" Malcolm Hawke simply smiled at his first born and opened his arms. Leigh nearly bowled him over as she ran to embrace him. "I've missed you so much Papa."_

"_And I have missed all of you as well." He held her back for a moment to look her over. "You have grown up to be a beautiful young woman." All Leigh could do was blush and rest her head against her father's chest. "I am so proud of you, Carver and Bethany. I am glad to see you have found each other again."_

"_This time I will not let any harm come to them."_

"_Leigh you had no way of stopping that ogre from hurting your brother, just as you could not have stopped what happened to Bethany or your mother. I put too much on you making you promise to protect the family. You can not take everything on your shoulders and expect to stay standing forever. You are human, you make mistakes. It is how you learn from them that makes you a better person."_

"_Everyone I have failed has been hurt, or killed. Every one of them takes a piece of me away when that happens Papa."_

"_You still think of him often don't you?"_

"_Almost everyday, Anders has helped close that gaping hole in my heart, but I still feel..."_

"_Like something is missing?"_

"_Yes, I am happy with Anders, I love him completely, but...I still love Leo."_

"_You always will. He was your first love, Leigh, they are hard to get over and even harder to forget."_

"_Was Mama yours?"_

"_She was the only woman I ever loved, yes, but I was a Circle mage. Love was not something we were afforded."_

"_Anders has told me the same thing. I hate that is has to be that way for mages. It is not right Papa."_

"_No it isn't, but it will not change over night. Even if mages are given their freedom it will be a long time before they heal. They must be taught how to survive out in the world. Most have been in the Circle since they were young, just like Leo and Anders. Your mother had to teach me so many things, that to a normal person would be common. Like hunting, we would have starved if it had not been for her. Swollen belly and all she went out and found us food. You are so much like her."_

"_I never knew...you always seemed like the one who knew everything."_

"_Behind ever man is a great woman. Your mother was no push over Leigh. She was tough and wise beyond her years. That is why I fell for her. She made me feel safe. Just like you make Anders feel safe I am guessing."_

"_I guess I do, we share that role sometimes. He has been strong for me when I needed him to be. Now with..."_

"_Now with your twins on the way you are afraid you won't be able to protect him and them, am I right?"_

"_How did you...?"_

"_Leigh I am your father and a healer. Your also glowing my darling little girl."_

"_I thought that was a myth."_

"_Here is the Fade it shows better than in the waking world." Leigh let out a small laugh and placed her hand on her stomach. _

"_I wish Mama and you were here for this."_

"_We will always be with you and your siblings. Your mother came to visit you on the Hallow a few years ago. She wanted you to know she was alright."_

"_I have expected to see you, but..."_

"_I was with your brother. He needed me more than you at the time. I am here now because you need me. I would be shirking my fatherly duties if I did not come to you now. Something is coming that will change everything Leigh. You must have the courage to face it."_

"_I don't understand?"_

"_Life as everyone knows it will change. It will be a struggle, but I know you will persevere as you always have. Thedas will need you."_

"_Oh that is not ominous." Malcolm chuckled and wrapped a large arm around his daughter and began to walk. The scenery around them changed to a cliff over looking a grand castle. A brilliant white light beaned from the middle of it shoot up into the sky. "What is that?"_

"_That is the Golden City my dear." Leigh turned away from it and covered her eyes._

"_I can't...no mortal is allowed to see it." A soft giggle came from in front of her and Leigh opened her eyes. A woman in a silver dress stood beaming at her. She looked a lot like the image of Pash Leigh had seen in their shared memories. She was just older, but no less beautiful._

"_The fact you think you are not worthy to see it makes you worthy. We have been watching you for sometime now Leigh Hawke. You have lived a life of grace and compassion. If that does not make you worthy to look upon my home I do not know what will."_

"_Your...Maker, your her. Andraste?"_

"_Yes, my daughter has spoken very highly of you. She does not give praise lightly."_

"_She...I don't know what to say, other than it is an honor to be in your presence."_

"_The honor is mine child. You are protecting those who can't fight for themselves. You remind me of myself when I was alive."_

"_I am not that wonderful. You freed thousands of people."_

"_You yourself have saved many people, all who would not be where they are now without you. Your friends, where would they be now if it had not been for your help and love. Fenris would be dead or even more bitter than he had been when you met him. Merrill would have been taken by a demon, Aveline would never had taken the steps to be with Donnic if you had not forced the issue. Sebastian would have fallen prey to assassins just like his family. Isabela would have been caught by the Qunari and killed. Varric would have no one to tell stories about and his life would be lesser without your friendship. Anders would be Tranquil like his friend Karl. All this you have done for them. You saved them and they in turn saved you." _

"_I never thought of it that way. Their my friends, I was just doing what is right."_

"_And there in lies the reason. If more people did what was right Thedas would be a peaceful place to live." Leigh looked back at her father who nodded to her. "I know you have many questions on why you were chosen for the magic you wield. I will answer what I can before you wake from here."_

"_Why is the Chantry the way it is now? I know from what I read from the scrolls Andres has that is was never meant to cage the mages."_

"_Jealously mostly turned the Chantry against the mages, but not from who you think. Spirits eaten away by hatred and envy at mortals. They wanted to be the chosen children. Mages were to use their magic to help man, not rule over him. I never said for magic to serve man. To serve is a forced thing. Help is a choice."_

"_Well they got that one very wrong. Mages are used as weapons and slaves. Abused and treated like beasts."_

"_I know and it pains me to see it."_

"_Why hasn't the Maker stopped it then? Why has he abandoned us?"_

"_The death of Drea by the hands of a magister made him...he was filled with a great sadness."_

"_Drea?"_

"_Sister to Compassion or Mercy as I know her. Drea's name means courage. She was a Templar."_

"_Pash has never talked about her."_

"_Mercy thinks she failed her sister. Both Justice and Drea where gravely injured when the magisters marched on the Golden City. She only had time to save one of them and Drea told her to save Justice." Leigh's hands flew to cover her mouth as tears welled up in her eyes. "Mercy was very lost after her sister passed."_

"_Do spirits die like mortals? Is there some other existence they go to?"_

"_Drea's soul broke into little wisps of light and descended into the mortal world. She gave the gift of Courage to those deemed worthy of it. You have a small piece of her in you. She wanted people to have the courage to stand up for what is right." _

"_You said she was a Templar? What was she like?"_

"_Very strong, devoted to the Order and her fellow Templars. It put her and her sister at odds for a few years."_

"_Why, did she hunt her sister?"_

"_Yes she did at the order of the Divine."_

"_She hunted her own sister?"_

"_Mercy was called a malificar for her views and her magic. She being the older of the two took my place as head of the true faithful. They had to hide from the rest of the world lest they be found and killed and my ashes fell into the wrong hands. Drea sent one of her order to spy on Mercy only to have it backfire on her. Justice fell in love with Mercy and defected from the order."_

"_My Justice? Well he's not mine, but..." Andraste laughed and nodded at Leigh. "He hates Templars."_

"_That hate came from his host more than him. Justice at first wanted nothing more than to bring Mercy in to pay for her crimes against the Chantry. Her compassion and wisdom changed his mind. He followed her til..."_

"_They were burned by the Chantry. Was it that event that changed Drea's mind?"_

"_No it was before that. The sisters met on neutral ground to talk after almost ten years apart. Mercy asked her sister to come back to Haven with her to see my final resting place. My faithful built a temple that tested your worth. Drea went through the tests and found a greater understanding of her sister and herself. She and a few of her order loyal only to her switched sides. The Divine did not take it well. Drea was not there when the Templars found Mercy and Justice. She was hiding their children so that the Chantry would never find them."_

"_What was the Divine so afraid of?"_

"_She was afraid she would lose her position and power it gave her. She was jealous of my daughters for their power and love of their followers, but what would you expect from a pride demon."_

"_That...that would explain a lot. So the Divine is possessed by a demon?"_

"_Ever single one since the first. Mercy knew what she was, but Drea did not want to listen at first. After the death of Mercy, Drea and her men stormed the Grand Cathedral to face the demon. Drea was the last one alive when she reached the main sanctum of the Chantry. She fought the demon to a stand still, but could not defeat it. When the Templars made it to where they were the demon turned back into the Divine. She ordered them to kill Drea. Having trained most of these men herself Drea dropped her weapon and let them end her life. She vowed with her last breath that she would return and end the demon's rein."_

"_How can she do that if she is gone?"_

"_She is not gone, just scattered. Every if one person has the courage to stand up to the Divine she will for fill her vow."_

"_And you think that it is me who can do this?"_

"_Perhaps or maybe it is the other marked by her sister that will. Only time will tell which of you is strong enough to do it."_

"_Who else is marked?"_

"_You know of him, his name is Leo." Leigh's eyes closed and tears slipped down her cheeks. That statement alone let her know he was still alive. She felt her father's hand on her shoulder and realized she was shaking. "He is alive and well. You will see him very soon if I am not mistaken."_

"_When?"_

"_Soon, that is all I can tell you. You must wake soon. I will give this warning to you, your father warned you something was coming that would change your life and the lives of all those around you. You will have a choice to make, it will keep all you love around you save one. It is your choice which one will leave your side forever. Choose wisely."_

"_I...I will try." Leigh knew if she asked anymore she would be told she would have to wait and see. "Wait I do have one more question if I may?"_

_'You may?"_

"_Was it you that saved my brother and kept him alive til Ori found him?"_

"_Yes, it was not his time."_

"_Thank you, I..."_

"_You are welcome, he has a part to play in this also, as well as your sister. Guard your family Leigh Hawke. They are your heart's blood without them you will not have the strength to survive what will come."_

"_Leigh it is time for you to leave and wake up. You will see me again before your little ones are born. Tell your brother and sister we love them and are together."_

"_I will Papa. I love you and Mama."_

"_We love you all so much. Wake up."_

OoO

"Leigh wake up. I have lunch for you." Anders sat the tray down and went to their bed to shake his love awake. "Maker woman you sleep like the dead. Wake up."

"An...Anders?"

"You have slept most of the day away love, you need to eat something to keep your strength up." Leigh sat up and stretched her arms over her head. Her trip to the Fade still very fresh in her mind. She shivered a bit and rubbed her arms to stop the gooseflesh from rising. "Are you cold?"

"Just a bit. Care to sit next to me and warm me up?"

"As you wish my lady."

"Did everyone leave?"

"Sebastian did, but everyone else is still here. I almost felt sorry for him, he was acting very uncomfortable."

"Why?"

"Could be I gave him dirty looks from across the table or maybe it was Isabela and Raven's risque talk."

"Must you give him dirty looks?"

"No, but it is fun to watch him squirm."

'Your horrible."

"Can you blame me? He has been trying to steal you away from me for years now."

"Your dancing around what I did love."

"I try not to think about it Leigh. I can't say it doesn't still hurt, but I will not let it tear us apart. I love you and always will no matter what."

"I love you too. So what did you bring me to eat I am starving?" Anders smiled and kissed her temple before handing her the tray of food.

"I had Orana make you some soup and bread. I put some herbs in it to help with the morning sickness."

"Maker bless you, I don't want to throw up again today. It was awful."

"I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault Anders you can't control if I get morning sickness or not."

"True, but I am still sorry you don't feel well."

"I guess I better get use to it for the next how ever many months I have left to go." She felt Anders' hand on her side and the pulse of magic go through her and then back into his hand.

"I'd say about seven months maybe a bit more."

"How did you do that?"

"Lots of practice. You do not want to know how many children I have delivered."

"I only helped with one and that was your friend Shyira. I use to leave the room when my father would help deliver babies. I didn't like the screaming."

"How old were you?"

"First memory I have of it was when I was six, I think. Broken bones and bloody gashes did not phase me one bit. People dying didn't even frighten me, I guess the screaming reminded me of the Fade before Pash and her friends made it safe for me to go there."

"Demons?"

"Like you would not believe. They would fight over which one of them was the strongest to possess me." Leigh's face went pale at the memory. She had not thought of it in years. It was her earliest memories and her most frightening.

"How did you meet Pash?"

"My father was trying to protect me in the Fade, but he was getting over whelmed. I saw Justice first as he stormed into the demons. Pash stood behind my father and I, putting up a barrier to protect us. I remember Pash talking to my father off away from me after the demons fled, leaving me alone with Justice. To a four year old he was so tall."

"He remembers that too. He said you showed no fear of him."

"I thought he was a knight like in the fairy tales Mama would read me. Don't look at me like that I was four. You know that when we were fighting Corypheus was the first time I had ever seen what he looked like under the helmet."

"And?"

"And what, I can see why Pash thinks he is handsome. He is." A blush flushed Anders' cheeks. Leigh gave a lighthearted laugh and put her hand on his cheek. "Pash and I are both very lucky girls to have such wonderful, handsome men in our lives." Her hand snaked around the back of his neck and pulled him forward into a kiss.

"We are the lucky ones, that both of you put up with us."

"So have you decided if we are leaving with my siblings or are we staying a little while longer in Kirkwall?"

"I need to make sure the Clinic will be alright without me. Since you are not feeling well I dare say it might be a bit longer before we leave here, but no more than a month."

"That will give me a chance to turn this place over to my cousin and my uncle. I guess in two days I say goodbye to my brother and sister again, but this time it won't be years before I see them again."

"Any ideas where is Ferelden we will go?"

"Lothering is gone, tainted, maybe Highever or Redcliffe. Or maybe we can find a little out of the way place that is just us."

"I like the sound of the last one, somewhere between Highever and Denerim so we can visit family."

"I see you are liking the idea of having a family."

"I adore Bethany and Carver, well...we will see how that goes. At least I know Ori is safe with him. Addler would be a fool to cross your brother."

"Yes he would, but I think your Commander has first dibs on ending his pathetic little life."

"That's the wonderful thing about having an assassin as a friend."

"So that is what she was before she became a Warden?"

"That and more, but that is for her to tell not me. Now I want you to eat before this get's cold." He set the tray up at her writing desk and she sat down to eat.

"I'm surprised how quiet the others are being."

"They are out in the courtyard talking. Varric is trying to get Raven to regale him with some of the messes we use to get in when I was a Warden. I swear he wants to know every embarrassing thing I have ever done so he can pad his stories."

"Take it as a complement. Varric is very fond of you."

"He has been a true friend, they all have for the most part. Even Fenris is being civil, Sebastian is the only one who hates me."

"He doesn't hate you love. He just doesn't understand. He has been so brainwashed by the Chantry that he can't see the truth. Magic is meant to help man and never rule over him."

"I thought the saying was "Magic is to serve man, not rule over him". I could be wrong though, I did sleep through most of the Chant when I was in the Circle."

"That is how they write it, but not how it was meant to be."

"So you finally got around to reading those scrolls."

"Something like that, yes." He gave her a questioning look, but she just shrugged and continued to eat her soup. They sat in silence for what seemed like forever when Anders finally opened his mouth.

"Has Pash ever talked about her sister?"

"No."

"Justice won't talk about her either."

"How did you hear about her other than the scrolls?"

"The spirit of hope mentioned her when she was protecting us. She said she died fighting the magisters who trespassed on the Golden City. I am surprised a spirit would believe that mages did that."

"They did Anders, furthering the nail in the coffin for mages. Corypheus squandered his gift and angered the Maker."

"Angered the Maker?"

"Pash and her sister were his children. The death of one of them made him give up on us."

"Aren't we all his children?" Leigh sighed and got up from her chair to sit by him on the bed. Her hand found his and gave it a light squeeze.

"We are, but only those two were his by his bride. They were his most beloved." A confused frown graced Anders' face and he shook his head. "Come on my love, enough of the mage talk, I want to spend some time with my family before they have to leave."

"I haven't told the rest we are leaving yet. Varric is the only one who knows and he is keeping it quiet til we are ready to tell them."

"I am not looking forward to telling them."

"We have time Leigh, let's enjoy them being around while we can for right now."

OoO

"Isabela you still cheat!"

"Why Warden Commander I don't know what you mean?" Raven glared at the pirate and threw her cards down. "Zevran is not here to help you this time kitten."

"I didn't need his help for me to know that you cheat. I just didn't want to offend you by grabbing your hands and proving it. I needed to learn to be a duelist."

'Needed or wanted to?" Isabela licked her lips and batted her eyes at Raven. A small blush crept up the Warden's neck making the pirate giggle.

"Bitch!"

"Whore!" Varric stepped between the two and tried to keep the peace.

"Now, now ladies please, Hawke will kill us if we wreck her home." Leigh stifled a giggle from the doorway and let Anders go in the room first. "Hey Blondie can you help me here?"

"Oh no, I am not getting in the middle of two women with daggers. I'm crazy not stupid." Varric looked up at both women and stepped back.

"I think your right Blondie better to have my bits intact than not." Leigh saw that Sebastian had returned and was sitting next to Fenris. He looked very uncomfortable under Anders' glare.

"Are all Fereldans like this?" Leigh put her hand on the prince's shoulder and smiled.

"No just the good ones."

"Are you feeling better Hawke?"

"Nothing my wonderful healer can't fix. I just was feeling under the weather, but I am fine now." Sebastian put his hand over hers.

"I am glad." Leigh heard Anders huff from the other side of the room. The prince noticed it too and quickly removed his hand from Leigh's. He stared at the floor so not to catch the mage's gaze.

"Can I see the two of you in the other room now?" Anders nodded and went to the library room and Sebastian followed. "We will be right back, try not to wreck my dining room please." She turned on her heels and joined them. Once she shut the door she rounded on both men. "I have had about enough. I have spent years of you two strutting around like a bunch of peacocks on display and it bloody ends now."

"Hawke..."

"No, you will let me finish. Anders you need to stop giving him dirty looks. You want to make the eyes of death at someone than you'd better do it to me. I am the one who made the mistake. Sebastian you are a dear friend and that is all it will ever be. I love Anders, I have chosen to be with Anders and Maker willing I will be marrying Anders. If you two can't get along for the short time I still have left living here, then I swear by Andraste I will beat the shit out of you both." Her emotions were running haywire through her, and she did not know why. Normally she would be much calmer than this. "_Pregnant women have mood swings Leigh." "Oh bloody great, just what I need." "It will only get worse." "Andraste's knicker weasels!" "Where id that come from?" "Anders." "The man needs help." "So does yours."_

"What do you mean by short time left to live here?" Leigh mentally smacked herself and drew a ragged breath to calm down.

"I am going home. Kirkwall is not my priority anymore, my family is. My brother serves Ferelden's king and so will my sister when she gets there. Kirkwall stopped being home when my mother died. I have stayed for my friends and for my sister, but with Bethany no longer chained in the Gallows I can leave."

"But what about becoming the Viscountess and changing things?"

"I don't know the first thing about running a city, nor do I really want to Sebastian. I am tired of fighting, I want to settle down, live a semi-normal life with the man I love. Is that too much to ask? Don't I deserve to be content?"

"Of course you do. I...I should never have pushed in the first place."

"When you asked me to take the seat I wanted to, but now...I can't see me doing it. I have other things that are far more important than ruling a city hellbent on self destructing. I'm sorry Sebastian."

"You need not apologize Hawke. I want you to be happy. If he makes you such than I can not complain."

"He makes me very happy. I pray you will find someone who will make you just as happy. Your my friend I wish nothing but the best for you."

"Thank you. I need to return to the Chantry for vespers. If it is alright may I come back by later if everyone is still here?"

"You are always welcome here Sebastian." He gave a bow and left the estate. Anders began rubbing Leigh's shoulders and felt how tense she was. "Maker that feels wonderful."

"You need to relax love, too much stress is not good for you or the little ones."

"I know, but I could not take it any longer with you two. It had to stop."

"I'm sorry love, it just..."

"I know." Leigh's face scrunched up into a mask of guilt and sadness. She turned away from him so she could stop the tears that were stinging her eyes. Anders gently turned her and crushed her to his chest. Her head nestled itself under his chin.

"None of that. I have forgiven you love, now you have to forgive yourself."

"Easier said then done."

"Try for me, please." Leigh sighed and nodded into his neck.

"For you."

OoO

Raven left the Hawke Estate early in the evening after dinner. Her heart troubled by the sense of another of her kind moving around the city. She had her spies keep an eye on the Templar turned Warden and what they reported back made her uneasy. He has allied himself with Meredith and her cronies. The bad part of it was Meredith knew Anders was here, but could not make a move on him for fear of what the Champion would do, but Addler was growing impatient. He wanted revenge for the death of Rolan and the others. She was so deep in thought on how to get him off alone so she could dispose of him she did not notice her old guild mate come up behind her until the cold steel was at her throat.

"That was a rookie mistake Raven. I had you dead to rights."

"Asha, thank the Maker."

"Kirkwall is not a city you want to be deep in thought in, even if you are safe in your home."

"So I see. What is he up to now?"

"He is trying to get the Grand Cleric to order the Templars here to take the Champion and Anders into custody. Stupid prig did not like her answer."

"And that was?"

"The Champions companions have done nothing but good for this city. Without proof she will not take an innocent man away from his patients."

"Without proof, ah his phylactery. Fat chance of them ever finding that."

"I have a feeling you had a hand in that my friend." Raven just let the grin on her face talk for her. Asha shook her head and chuckled. "He is a very lucky apostate to have you as a friend. You really are a advocate for the underdogs aren't you?"

"Someone has to be."

You and the Champion are a lot a like. Even down to one of your trainers."

"Huh?"

"Leigh Hawke was a student of mine years ago. It was before I joined the guild. I was a loner and ran afoul of some bandits. Her father found me half alive and healed me. In return I trained his oldest to be a rogue. I dare say she could give you a very big run for your sovereigns. She vanishes better than any I have ever seen, even you friend."

"That would explain why some of her moves were familiar." A buzzing in her head gave Raven a warning of another Warden heading their way. She and Asha backed into the shadows and let them hide their presence. As the buzzing got closer Raven relaxed she knew this person by their voice through the Taint. "Sigrun over here."

"There you are we have been looking all over for you since this morning. Nate wanted me to tell you it is done and we are ready."

"Good, I have a very bad feeling it will be soon."

"I hope not."

"This city is at the boiling point Sigrun. It will take only a little bit more heat to boil over."

"Balls!"

"My thoughts exactly." The three woman finished their discussion and went their separate ways. Each having their own job to do to make sure their plan worked.

OoO

"Sister?"

"Up here Carver." Carver Hawke headed up the stairs of his sister's estate. He wanted to take to her before he had to leave. With all of her friends hanging around most of the day he did not get the chance. "Where?" Leigh came out of a room on the left of the stairs and beckoned him to come in.

"This was Mama's room." Carver took a deep shaky breath and looked around the dimly lit room. "I haven't had the heart to change anything in three years. Orana comes in her and dusts every week, but other than that..."

"It wasn't your fault, it was the bastard who took her from us."

"I come in here sometimes and I swear I can hear her talking to me. I miss her."

"I do too, at least you and Bethany got to be here for her when...well when I was not here."

"She never stopped mourning you. Her little boy. You know she visited me on the Hallow right after her death three years ago."

"Papa was with me. Telling me I wasn't alone, no matter what I had my sisters. I thought there was no way, you all had to be dead. We were surrounded, but here you are alive and well."

"I asked Mama to tell Papa and you I said hello and that I loved you both so much, but she told me to tell you myself. So I waited for you to show up every Hallow since and now you are here right before the next Hallow. So hello Carver and I have missed you." Carver threw back his head and laughed. His arms wrapped around his sister's small frame and hugged her tight.

"I have missed you as well Leelee and I love you." Leigh pushed back a bit from him and smiled.

"I have something for you." She broke away from him for a moment and rummage through her mother's chest of drawers. Once she found what she was looking for she returned to his side. She placed the object into her brother's large hand and closed it before he could peek. When he opened his hand a small gasp escaped his lips.

"Maker she kept this?"

"Yes, it was all we had to remember you by." On a chain was a silver medallion with the royal emblem. It was given to Carver for joining the king's army to fight at Ostagar. It was a symbol of unity for those not formally trained, but brave none the less. "I still have mine as well."

"We did try didn't we?"

"As best we could. Their was nothing we could have done to stop it Carver. All we can do now is move on and live."

"It is much easier now that I know you and Bethany are alive and well. It is like part of the nightmare is over. Lothering is gone, but we remain stronger than ever."

"Hey is this just for you two or can any Hawke join?" Bethany had tears in her eyes seeing her older siblings getting along for the first time ever. Leigh opened her arm as did Carver and Bethany walked over to join the embrace.

"Papa and Mama are smiling from the Fade at us."

"I hope so. Seeing what Papa had to do to keep mother safe, it...he really was a brave man wasn't he?"

"The bravest Beth."

"Now Carver is the man of the family."

"No pressure there, little sister." Both sisters laughed at their brother and hugged him tighter. "I guess I should have listened to him all those years ago. He told me that one day I would appreciate my sisters. Well today is the day. Maker who would have ever thought this?"

"Papa." The three siblings laughed while leaning on each other. They did not notice the rest of Leigh's friends watching from the small hallway. Aveline and Varric shared a look and walked away giving the Hawkes their moment. Anders hung back for a minute more and met Leigh's gaze. He smiled at her and went back into the main room of the house.

"_She looks happy." "Yes she does. I fear that it won't last." "She is strong my friend do not give up on your life with her." "If I become a murderer she will not love me Justice. I will break her heart and that will kill me more than the Templars can." "You think she will kill you for that?" "Justice would be served if she does. You will be free and hopefully changed back." "She doesn't know does she?" "Maker, no how can I tell her that?" "Easy, you just say Leigh I am..." "NO!" "Alright your choice, but it will come out and it will be better coming from you."_

OoO

"Sebastian you look upset." Grand Cleric Elthina had been watching her young charge for over and hour now. His shoulders were slumped and his face a mask of sorrow.

"It is nothing Your Grace. I received some bad news today is all."

"Come and walk with me Sebastian. Let me hear your troubles." He bowed and fell in step with the older woman. "I have not seen Serah Hawke of late. Is she well?"

"I believe so, I have not seen her much in the last two months. She is leaving Kirkwall soon."

"Is she, and how do you feel about that?"

"I...don't want her to go. Maker forgive me I...love her and she only sees me as a brother, a friend." Elthina placed a sympathetic hand on the young rogue's arm.

"You covet what you can not have and miss what you do. She has been you friend for years. She has cared for you and protected you from harm. Take heart in that and know you have a friend for life." Sebastian nodded, but inside his heart he was dying. He had tasted what it was like to wake up beside her and envied Anders greatly. He could still feel her warm body next to his. Her hands resting gently on his waist while they slept. The smell of her perfume and the fire in her eyes when their bodies met. How was he to forget how that felt? How was he to let that go?

"I will pray on this Your Grace."

"Sebastian, there is time for praying and there is time to deal with your feelings."

"I have voiced them to her, but she loves Anders, even though he will get her killed."

"Ah the apostate, you are not the only one who wants him gone."

"Who else wants Anders?"

"A Warden Templar who has told me Anders killed his friend. I do not know if I believe the man though. He is full of anger and hates mages."

"Anders murdered a man?"

"And did not murder a troop of men? It might not have been at your own hands, but you put it in motion."

"I...your right Your Grace. I have no room to judge."

"No my dear boy you do not. Nor does anyone have the right to judge you for your actions. We are human Sebastian, we all make mistakes. It is how we learn from them and live our lives after that defines us. I am excusing you from your duties here for the next few days. You need to reflect away from here. The Queen of Ferelden is here in Kirkwall. If I remember correctly you two are childhood friends. Go talk to her Sebastian, clear your head. Maybe you can confide more in her than in me."

"I will Your Grace and...thank you. You have always been good to me, even when I am a total brat."

"You have grown into a fine young man right before my eyes. I am proud of you. Now go and I hope when I see you next you have that smile I have come to love back on your face."

OoO

"Sebastian it is good to see you again. Please come in."

"Ashlyn it is good to see you too. How are you?"

"As good as to be expected. Orlais is being a right pain, but when are they not."

"Is this because of what Leigh did?"

"It wasn't just her or the Qunari Tallis. It is because they have never forgiven us for fighting back and winning. My poor Alistair is a beast against darkspawn, but with politics, he is lost."

"I know how he feels. I can't stand the posturing nobles feigning support, just to cut me down later. It is sickening."

"This is why Alistair has me. I can spot out the fakes and help ally him with the good. We will help as much as we can, you need only ask."

"I would have thought my rakish ways would have turned you against me."

"You know full well I can not judge you, not after what I did."

"Ah, yes the runaway noble. You were gone for how many years?"

"Three, just long enough for Anora to marry Cailan and for me to be branded a coward and a whore."

"But your not..."

"Did not matter then, but it does now. Alistair is the only man I have ever loved completely. I might add the only one who I have ever been with in the Chantry sense too. I had a hard fight to change minds about me and it is still a struggle. The Hero of Ferelden has a higher standing with the people then I ever will. She is a symbol much like the Champion of Kirkwall. Her status is what has kept Orlais from marching here and on Ferelden. They fear her power over the people. She is a natural leader."

"I know full well. I just wish she...no it is a foolish thought."

"Speak freely friend, something is weighing you down, it is better to get it off your chest. Trust me you don't want it eating you from the inside out." Sebastian sighed and the words poured out of his mouth. He confessed his love for Leigh and his indiscretions with her. He let the guilt and anger out with every word. Ashlyn sat and listened, comforting when he needed it and gave wisdom when it was called for. "How long have you held that all in?"

"Too long. How can I be a good ruler when I am jealous of a man who has nothing, but the clothes on his back?"

"The fact you question yourself is what will make you a good ruler. Tyrants never question, they just want power and control. You want the best for your people."

"I can't help but still love her and want her beside me. How do I get past that?"

"The love will always be there, but you have to choose if you will let it poison your heart or lift it. I do think she loves you too, but not in the way you want. It is love none the less."

"You have changed much Ashlyn. It is good to see the woman you have become."

"I could say the same about you. You are not the spoiled little boy I knew, drinking and whoring his way through life. Elthina really did tame you."

"I tested her so much, I surprised she did not turn me over to the Templars to beat the willfulness out of me."

"She saw the man you could be." Sebastian stood to ready himself to leave, but Ashlyn stopped him. "No matter what happens you must never be bitter. It does you no honor."

"I will try. Thank you Ashlyn for everything. It was good to get this off my chest."

"You are quite welcome my friend. I am here for two more days if you need to talk further. Just send a message first to make sure I am here. My steward knows how to find me and I will return to talk to you."

"I will see you before you leave then. Good night."

"Good night Sebastian." She made sure he was gone before sinking into her chair. "Maker, this is really not going to go well." She looked over the plans her and the other Wardens have practiced for the last two months. She hoped it was enough to see them through this. "The things I do for my Wardens."

"And we all are grateful for it."

"Hello Velanna."

"We are ready. Let's just hope Justice does his part and give us a signal with enough time to get it done or we will be dead."

"He will, he has never let us down before, Anders on the other hand..."

"Vel don't. He has changed."

"I know Commander, but he is so much trouble."

"Yes and so were you, if you remember. Anders at least did not try to kill me when I met him." Velanna just rolled her eyes at the queen.

"Well you know how us crazy Dalish are, you call one of us sister."

'Shy is not crazy."

"She is not a normal Dalish and you are not a normal shem."

"No I guess I am not. Normal is boring."

"Crazy is so much more fun." Both woman laughed and shook their heads. "It is worth it Ashlyn, the mages must be freed and your Chantry changed."

"I know, but the price of it...let's hope it won't become necessary. I am retiring for the evening. It has been a long day."

"Sleep well, we will keep watch."

"Rotate shifts we all need to be on our game the next few days."

"Yes Commander, good night."

"Good night Vel." Ashlyn gave one last look to the plans and threw them back on her desk. "_Maker keep us safe and bring me home to Alistair and Duncan. Help us find a peaceful solution to this. If not guide us with grace and compassion through the hard times to come."_


	33. Chapter 33

_Leigh could smell burning flesh and heard screams of the dying. She was covered in blood, but it was not her own. Her daggers dripped the dark liquid and she could see dead Templars and mages at her feet. She rounded a corner in Lowtown she knew well enough and skidded to a halt. _

"_You die for what you have done malificar." Sebastian stood behind Anders with a dagger drawn. His eyes filled with hatred and murder._

"_Then I die, at least I will be free."_

"_Sebastian stop!" He turned slightly, but his eyes never left Anders' back._

"_You can not stop me Hawke, he is a murderer and I will see justice done." Without another word Sebastian buried his dagger in the heart of the man Leigh loves. Her scream was deafening as she ran to catch Anders before his body hit the ground. She caught the last blue flash of Justice dying along with Anders and something in both her and Pash broke. With a very cold calm she closed the eyes of the man she would have given anything to save and stood up slowly. "It had to be done."_

"_So does this." Her blades lashed out and she sliced into the prince's flesh. His eyes went wide and he tried to defend himself. Leigh hit him with a frost spell at his feet making sure he could not escape. She could see the fear in his eyes and she felt a rush of pleasure from it. "You killed my soulmate, now I tear you apart." Her eyes glowed their hellish red and her skin cracked showing off a bright red glow._

"_Hawke...pl...please..."_

"_Time to join your family." There was no emotion in her voice, it was dead. She began tearing her friend apart piece by piece. His dying screams faded away til all she could hear was the wet sound of limbs being rend from what was left of his body. The last thing Leigh remembered before her body twisted in agony was her hands covered in blood and gore._

"NO!" The room was still dark as the fire had died out. Her body violently shook and her heart threatened to beat out of her chest. Leigh's hands searched the other side of the bed for her lover, but he was not there. A cold dread filled her when her door flew open. Carver stood in the doorway, followed closely by Bethany and the house servants.

"Leigh, what is it? What's wrong?"

"Where is he?"

"Who?"

"Where is Anders?" Carver went to touch his sister and she cringed away from his touch. Orana lit a few candles to give the room some light. Leigh's eyes were wild and full of fear. "Where is he?"

"He went to his clinic my lady. He said there were things he need to take care of." She did not wait for Bodahn to stop talking she ran for the cellar door.

"Leigh wait!"

OoO

Anders went over the list again making sure he had the Clinic well stocked. Between Varric and Leigh this place was far better than it had been when he had first met them. Looking around he felt a small swell of pride, knowing he had saved so many lives here. It also made him sad for those he lost, but also the fact he was leaving it behind. The people down here were like a extended family to him. Some of the children he sees running around in front of the Clinic he brought into this world. Could he leave them behind? He knew he had to for his own sake as well as Leigh's. Kirkwall was making it harder for him to stay in control of his anger. Vengeance threatened to take both he and Justice over more and more everyday. He did not want to become a demon or make Leigh have to end him because of it.

"Well that is it, done with inventory for now. I will need to get Leigh to order some more elfroot from Sol and we will be set for the rest of the month." He placed the parchment on his desk and heard his door slam oppen with a great force. Wheeling around he expected a troop of Templars, not his love. Her eyes darted around the Clinic til they fell on him. She ran full force to him and almost knocked him over when she reached him. Love, what's wrong?" Leigh could only clutch at his shirt and sob openly. He saw her siblings run up to the door and stop before they got to close to them. "What happened?"

"Don't know, we heard her scream, then she asked where you were and she ran down here." Bethany rubbed her arms to keep out the chill that was creeping up her spine. Her sister who was always so strong looked so lost. It frightened her.

"She wouldn't even let us touch her to calm her down." A faint red glow took over Leigh's body and the sobbing stopped abruptly.

"Pash?"

"Yes,..."

"What happened?"

"She had a nightmare and is having a very hard time shaking it."

'Is that why your out?"

"No, she pushed me forward...I am not sure why."

"What was the dream about?"

"Her watching Prince Vael kill you."

"Maker..."

"She ripped him apart with her bare hands, before..."

"Before what?"

"Before twisting into an abomination. Her magic is so great that even I can not stop that if she so chooses to give into rage and despair. It is her greatest fear and your death is always the catalyst when she has nightmares."

"And when she didn't find me in bed she thought...shit."

"Her emotions are all over the place due to her pregnancy. Add that to the tensions in Kirkwall and with Sebastian...she can't control her dreams. It frightens her to lose control like this."

"Can't you help her?"

"I have tried Carver, but since she and I are one being her feeling are mine. I can help, but not when they overwhelm me like they did in her dream."

"So there is nothing we can do for her?"

"I did not say that, but it will have to be Anders to help her. He is the strongest of her mage friends and she trusts him."

"What do you need me to do?"

"You will have to go after her."

"Go after her?"

"She has retreated into her mind to protect herself."

"So I have to go into the Fade?"

"Sort of. It is complicated."

"But Justice..."

"Will not be going with you. I can bring you into her mind without him."

"How...?"

"Magic."

"I know that, but how can you do this?" Pash waved a hand over over his forehead and a symbol appeared.

"Anders what is that?" He saw Bethany point to his head and he gave her a questioning look.

"It is a symbol that was put on him when he first truly entered the Fade as a boy. It has protected him from demons all his life." Carver rolled his eyes a bit and stared at the symbol on the blonde mage's head.

"Tell that to Mister Grumpy who wanted to gut me a while ago."

"Justice is no demon, but the mixture of Anders' anger and Justice's inability to deal with it has made Vengeance. It is another entity all together."

"So he has three different...voices in his head?" Anders rolled his eyes at Carver and shook his head.

"It is hard to explain Carver. Vengeance is a combination of Justice and I, yet not."

"I'm sorry I asked. So how is he going to help my sister?"

"It is her guilt and fear that has petrified her. You must help her through it or she will not be ready for what will be coming."

"What's coming?" Pash sighed. She had said too much in front of Leigh's siblings.

"Becoming a mother is not easy and she does not need her emotional demons making it harder. She fears losing people she cares about, that was the premise of her dream. It is her mind acting against her."

"So we should get to this then." Anders shifted his weight uncomfortably from foot to foot. Not knowing what he was getting into. "I just have one question, if she happens to attack me and kill me in her head will it make me..."

"No it is will not make you Traquil. It is much like going into Fenyrial's dream."

"That makes me feel a little better. We should not do this here."

"At the estate then."

OoO

"Are you sure this is wise Bethany, this spirit could be tricking them?"

"Cullen if she wanted to hurt us she would have by now. Maker she saved your life back in that horrible place. Please trust she will not harm us."

"It just goes against everything I have been trained for."

"I know, but so is loving a mage and we see how well you stuck to that rule."

"You Hawke women are surely enchantresses. I always prided myself for never giving in, but you my dear lady have bewitched me." Bethany could not help but giggle at the face Cullen was making. To an outsider he would look socially awkward, but to Bethany he was perfect. "Anders really does love Leigh doesn't he?"

"I think he really does. My sister can be difficult to deal with as you well know and he takes her in stride. It took them three years of dancing around each other to finally be together. If I had not been in the Circle I would have smacked both of them for being stupid. Her for putting up with his stalling and him for making her wait."

"What I remember of Anders was he was the love them and leave them type. He was a flirt, and as lecherous as they come."

"Leigh would have killed him if he had done that to her."

"I know full well your sister is capable of killing someone, she tried with me."

"No she gave you a warning Cullen, if she wanted you dead you would be dead. Leigh does not miss her mark."

"I've seen. I just hope this is the right thing to do. I worry for both of them."

"So do I."

OoO

"Are you ready?"

"No, but..."

"You will be fine Anders."

"Will she be though?"

"I think so yes. You must get her to admit the root of her fear so she can heal and move on."

"And what is the root of her fear?"

"That is what you are there to find out."

"Pash can't you ever give me a straight answer?"

"If I gave you all the answers, how would you grow? I am a guide nothing more, I am not here to make it easy for either of you."

"Thanks for that." Pash pushed him into the room and they sat on the floor facing each other.

"You must relax Anders or this will be unpleasant for both of us." He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. Pash gave one last glance to Leigh's family before closing her eyes and taking his hands. "Justice will be your link back to your body, he is your anchor."

"Why do I have this image of him holding a rope that is wrapped around my waist?"

"That sounds about right."

"Maker, why me?"

" Why not you?" Anders opened his mouth to answer and was stopped by a wave of magic. He felt like he was tipped forward. It was much like going through a Harrowing. He opened his eyes and found Pash had his hand. She looked like she did when he was child. "We are almost there." Looking around Anders saw some of Leigh memories. He marveled at how much she had changed for the round faced little toddler to the striking woman he knows now.

"So this is Leigh's mind?"

"Surprised?"

"Just a bit. Holy Maker!" He stopped and stared at an image of him. It was how he use to look, before Justice and the Wardens. He could see the sparkle in his eyes that was now gone. Washed away by so many years of abuse and rage. "She still thinks of me this way."

"She does, even though she does not know you are the same man. First loves we never truly get over. They mark us forever, even after death."

"You and Justice?"

"Me and Justice, we are bound together by a thread that will never be broken."

"I never stopped thinking of her, ever. It just with Justice it took a very long time to sort out which memories were mine and which were his."

"It is the same with her and I." Anders saw across from the old image of him the image of him now. They walked past what looked like doors and passageways. Some he could catch glimpses of her memories others were locked or to dark to see. Pash stopped when they reached a grotto, stone pillar shaped in a circle made the center. In the middle of the pillars sat Leigh hugging her legs to her chest. Her back was to them and he could see her shoulders shaking.

"This is where I leave you. The rest is up to you."

"I just hope I can help her. I hate seeing her like this." He watched Pash fade away leaving him alone, but he could still feel her presence near by. Watching and waiting for him to help the woman he loves. Anders swallowed hard and took a few steps into the grotto. The closer he got the more he wanted to run and hold her. Leigh must have heard him or sensed him because she lifted her head off her knee.

"I don't want to talk about it Pash, just leave me alone." Her voice was shaky and hoarse.

"I would, but I'm stuck here til you talk about what is bothering you." Leigh jumped to her feet and turned to face him. Her expression was a cross between utter rage and pain.

"Very funny Pash. You really think that using an image of Anders will work."

"Love, I'm not Pash."

"I don't believe you."

"Hmm, how do I prove it is me?" Anders crossed the distance between them and took a hold of her shoulders. She struggled as he bent his head to kiss her. At first she growled at him trying to push him away, but he did not let her win. He picked her up and pinned her to one of the pillars. Her eyes went wide and her struggling ceased. "Believe me now."

"What...how did you get here?"

"Pash, she is worried about you and thought I would be able to reach you when she couldn't." He let her move away from the pillar, but did not let go of her hand.

"I'm fine."

"Yes I can see you are. Is that why you almost ripped the door off my Clinic and threw yourself into my arms crying?"

"I had a nightmare."

"Look as someone who has chronic nightmares, I think there is more to it."

"It was just a stupid dream, just leave it alone."

"Then tell me about it."

"I...I don't want to."

"Love this is me, you know you can tell me anything and I will not judge you." She looked him in the eye and saw he was telling her the truth. He has never judged her. Even if he did not agree with some of the things she has done.

"The dream...I saw Sebastian kill you after calling you murderer. I held you in my arms and watched the light leave..." Leigh's voice caught and she bit back a sob. "I attacked him, ripped him apart with my bare hands. I showed no mercy. Part of me enjoyed it at least I did in the dream."

"Is that all?"

"No...I...I think at the end I turned into an abomination."

"Love you already are, at least by Chantry mandate. So am I. With Justice and Pash a part of us it is very unlikely we will become the twisted creatures we have seen and fought."

"I was just so angry at him. He took you away from me."

"Is this because of what I told you in the Deep Roads?"

"No, I don't think it is. I understand why you will have to leave me one day. I hate it, but I understand."

"What are you afraid of?"

"Nothing why?"

"Your dreams might be your fears trying to surface and work themselves out."

"I'm not afraid of anything!"

"Don't get defensive love, I am trying to help."

"I don't need help. This is my mess not...why is he punishing me?"

"Who?"

"The Maker."

"Leigh your not making sense."

"All I want is a life with you and to give you a family."

"I thought that was the reason we were leaving Kirkwall. So our children do not have to be raised in a place with so much violence and hate."

"It is, but...there might be another problem."

"Whatever it is we will face it together Leigh. I am not letting you go through anything alone. Talk to me, please love. I want to help, I want you to be happy."

"You are making this harder on me."

"What? Are you leaving me behind? Are you done with me?" The hurt look on his face broke her resolve.

"Never! But I...if I tell you what my fear is, you might be done with me."

"Not likely. Did you sell your soul to a demon? Kill a litter of kittens? Side with Meredith?"

"No."

"Then why would I be done with you?"

"For the fact I...you said that you thought I am about two months into this pregnancy. Well almost two months ago I..." The pieces of the puzzle clicked into place and Anders knew why she was afraid.

"Your wondering if the babies are mine or his." She nodded not wanting to speak. She turned away from him so she did not have to see the look on his face. To his credit as much as that realization hurt he did not let it show. He knew deep down there might have been this chance the children she carried were not his, but in his heart he hoped they were. "Have you told him your pregnant?"

"I can't. He'll...he'll demand I stay here til they are born to see. I can't stay here anymore. This place is ripping you apart and it is killing me to see you lose yourself everyday to the fight between mage and Templar. The Templars have taken enough from me, I will not let them take you as well. I won't survive it."

"Leigh, I can't tell you it will not hurt if they are not mine, but I can tell you even if they are Sebastian's children, I won't love you or them any less."

"Do you mean that?"

"Yes I mean it. Your the only woman I have ever loved. You are my soul mate. Don't you remember what I called you before we went after Corypheus?"

"Mo Aman Cara, my soul mate."

"Then know I will not leave you because of this, but if they are his, does he not have a right to know?"

"Yes. I just...I don't want...ugh, this is frustrating."

"We will get through this together. Until these precious little ones make their debut there is no reason to say anything to him."

"When did you become the level headed one?" He gave her a wry smile and put his forehead to hers.

"Who said I was level headed?"

OoO

Raven entered the Hawke estate and was met by Bodahn and Sandal. She saw Cullen and Ori sitting on the stairs up the to the master bed room, both looking a bit worried. The Warden talked quietly to the dwarves to find out what was going on. Tovis Leigh's Mabari hound paced the floor and whined a bit.

"So he went after her with the help of the spirit?"

"Apparently, I know nothing about magic messere."

"Where are they?"

"Up in their room. Master Carver and Mistress Bethany are up there watching." Raven nodded and went to the stairs. She place a hand on Cullen and Ori's shoulders. She gave them a reassuring smile and went up to the room. She found Carver pacing and Bethany was sitting in a chair near the fire. Raven entered the room quietly and was not prepared for what she saw. On the floor sitting crossed legged was Anders and Leigh. Their hands were intertwined and their bodies were glowing.

"Maker's breath!" Carver stopped pacing and Bethany's head popped up.

"Warden Commander, what are you doing here?"

"I came to talk to Anders, to discuss his return to Ferelden. Bodahn filled me in on some of what happened this morning. I...I have seen many things in my life, but this...this is new."

"They have been like this for over an hour now." Bethnay got up from her chair and leaned against her brother. Raven went a knelt by her fellow Warden. She saw his head turn just slightly to look at her.

"Justice?"

"Yes, Commander."

"Are they...?"

"They are fine. It should not be much longer."

"I thought you and he are fused, one?"

"I am his anchor to his body. He had to help Hawke."

"I understand." The glow from both of them started to fade. Anders blinked a few times at seeing the concerned blue eyes of Raven. "Welcome back."

"Raven? Maker my head hurts."

"Not as much as mine does." Leigh groaned and leaned into Anders. She caught the figures of Carver and Bethany out of the corner of her eye and turned her head to face them. "Why do you two look like someone died?"

"We were worried about you. You need to stop doing this to us."

"Bethany I...I am so sorry. I am just all over the place with my emotions."

"Why?"

"Pregnancy and Kirkwall." Bethany snickered a bit and went over to hug her sister. "Hopefully once we leave here it will get a little better."

"I hope so sister. Papa never prepared me on how to deal with this."

"I know Carver. I don't think he was prepared either."

"At least he knew what it is like to be a mage, I have no clue what it is like."

"I am still learning what it is like Carver. I have only had my full magic for three years and most of the time I still just use my daggers." The siblings talked and Anders made his way over to Raven.

"Somethings wrong isn't it?" He whispered in his Commanders ear. She motioned for him to follow and she led him to the study. She shut the door and they kept their voices down.

"I had a very interesting visit from Sebastian Vael. He had a lot to say about you and Hawke. He is very jealous of you."

"So he has shown, did he say anything else?"

"He confessed to me that he...slept with Hawke when they both were drunk." Ravens hand went to Anders forearm in comfort.

"I know about it. It was my fault for being a prig. I hurt her and she tried to drown her hurt in whiskey."

"It still hurts, trust me I know."

"I remember you telling me about that. How did you...how did you deal with it?"

"I was the one who asked him to do what he did to save us. I hated myself for it and part of me still does. Having Duncan helped ease that hate, but there is a child of his out there that is not mine. It hurts I will not lie to you, it feels like being run over by an ogre."

"Ouch."

"Yes, ouch, but I love him and he loves me. That is all that matters. People make mistakes Anders don't let one misstep tear you apart."

"I'm not, I love her more than life itself. More than freedom and you know how much I love being free. I am putting aside the plight of mages for her so we can go back to Ferelden to raise our children. I know it is safer there for us than here or anywhere for that matter. I want to keep her safe."

"You really have changed haven't you?"

"I have and it is all thanks to her."

"What of your plans?"

"I really don't know. Everything is set, but I can't do that to her. She would never forgive me."

"Thank the Maker, you have come to your senses."

"Raven, you know why I have to do this. It has to stop. They treat us like a disease, locking us away so they can quell our numbers. Hoping if they get us all under lock and key they can do away with us in a few hundred years or less. You can't tell me if it was you or your family you would not strike them where it hurts."

"I would, and that is why I have not tried to stop you. If it was me I would bring a blood bath to rival the Blight, but I am a bitch like that."

"You will never hear me call you that."

"Not to my face anyway. I know what you all use to say behind my back when I first made you Wardens. You hated me."

"I did not. You saved my sorry ass. I just hated the forced runs and the training you put us through. I was a soft flabby mage, we don't run with full packs on our backs."

"And where would you be if I hadn't made you do all that?"

"Dead, I would be dead. Without those runs I never would have made it in time to help Leigh and the others when they went to find Nathaniel."

"So is that a thank you?"

"Yes, thank you for everything. I will never understand why you saved me back then or even now, but thank you."

"I told you before Anders, you are a good man. You stayed to help in Vigil's Keep when I told you to run. You impressed me with your courage and heart. You are everything I wanted in a fellow Warden."

"Stop it Commander you are making me blush." Raven gently smacked his arm, but the smile near left her face. "You are a true friend Ash."

"As are you Anders."

OoO

Later in the afternoon Varric came to the estate to help Leigh draw up the papers to transfer the home over to her cousin. Anders had gone back to the Clinic to go over the running of it with Lirene and the other women who have helped him run the place for years now. Raven had gone with him making sure Addler could not do anything to the mage. The mood was much lighter than it had been in the beginning of the day. The nightmare Leigh had was almost a distant memory.

"So Hawke have you and Blondie thought of any names yet for the kids yet?"

"Not yet Varric. I have a few in mind, but he and I have to agree on them."

"Varric is always a good name." Leigh smiled at her friend and leaned down to kiss his forehead.

"There is only one Varric." A very red blush flashed up his cheeks. "You have been such a good friend Varric. I do not know what I would have done with out you all these years. When we leave your the one I will miss the most."

"I will visit the two of you so much you both will be sick of seeing me."

"I will never get sick of seeing you." Leigh signed the last of the documents and handed them to Varric. "All done. Maker I don't remember having to write this much out when I got this place."

"Times have changed since then Hawke. It is all in order though."

"I know Charade will be grateful for that. She is excited to move her and Gamlen in here."

"At least you didn't leave the place to Gamlen."

"Not after he lost this place in the first place."

"True, I am sorry Hawke, but your uncle is an idiot."

"No need to apologies, I know."

"Well you two are seeming to be having too much fun in here."

"Hello Blondie, Hawke and I were just finishing up the documents to transfer the estate."

"Is it all in order?"

"All in order."

"Good, so is the Clinic. It looks like we can leave sooner than we thought." Leigh had a shocked look on her face.

"We can leave with Carver and Bethany?"

"Yes love, we can leave in the morning. I guess we'd better pack up our belongings." Leigh squealed and jumped up from her seat to embrace Anders.

"Thank you, thank you. I...Maker we need to go pack. Varric can you gather the others. We have to..." Tears of joy and sorrow slide down her face.

"I'll get them Hawke, you and Blondie get packing." With that Varric took his leave. He waited til he got outside of the home to let the tears he had been holding back to come. He was not ready to say goodbye to them, especially Leigh. He quickly wiped the tears away and headed off to gather the eclectic group that had been family to Hawke. Inside Anders followed Leigh up to their room and started packing up their belongings.

"Maker when did I accumulate all this stuff?"

"Money does that love."

"I just want to take what we need. Armor, some clothing, my mother's jewelry and my father's things. Anything else we can get in Ferelden."

"Agreed, I just have the clothes on my back, my staff, and some books."

"Don't forget to take your old coat. I will see about getting the feathers redone."

"It has seen better days love it might be time to just burn the thing."

"Don't you dare, I will get it fixed."

"I won't argue."

"Good, hand me those books over there." He looked at the titles and groaned.

"Why are you taking these?"

"Something to remember Varric and Isabela by when they are not with us."

"You actually read this trash?"

"It isn't half bad, if you look passed the bullshit."

"That leaves the word the love."

"More packing less talking. We have a lot to do so we can leave tomorrow."

"I will have Carver and Cullen help me bring the rest of the trunks up from the cellar. Be right back." Leigh went to her wardrobe and took out a small box. It held an earring that had long ago lost it's mate. Part of her wanted to get rid of it, but her heart would not let her. She held the little golden hoop in her palm and let her mind slip back. She did not notice Anders and Cullen had brought up a trunk. "What is that love?" Leigh jumped and the earring went flying. Anders caught it before it hit the ground.

"You should not sneak up on me like that."

"We made enough noise to wake the bloody dead love, you looked deep in thought."

"I was, sorry just thinking." Anders handed it back to her. His face a mask of neutrality, but inside his stomach flipped. He knew this earring, he still had it's mate tucked away in side a pouch he always carried.

"Here, where is it's mate?"

"Gone."

"Then why keep it?" Cullen looked over her shoulder and frowned.

"It has sentimental value Cullen. I gave the other to a person I will never forget."

"Then it is not really gone now is it." A loud bang from behind made them all turn as Carver dropped another two trunks into the room.

"Stop flapping your lips and pack. I want to make sure we get all this stuff on the ships before morning."

"Alright Carver we get the hint you want to go home."

"Damn right I do. Kirkwall is...a fucking nightmare. I'd rather deal with dog shit and mud than Templars and nutcases." Leigh couldn't help herself and broke out into a laughing fit. "it's not funny Leigh."

"Oh yes it is, I have had to deal with it for over seven years Carver, you only about a month."

"Get packing Leelee. Come on Cullen we need to go down to the docks and get some hands to move this stuff."

"We'll be back." Anders shut the door behind them and pulled Leigh against him.

"Everything will be alright Leigh."

"I know, as long as I have you it will be."

We'd better get this done. This time tomorrow we will be on a ship bound for Ferelden."

"I can't wait."

"The funny thing is neither can I."

OoO

"You can do this to us Meredith, we have rights!"

"No mage you don't I will have this tower searched top to bottom. I know you have blood mages in your ranks and I will find them. You have one hour to gather your people in the main room so we can conduct the search." Orsino growled at the retreating form of the Knight Commander. He turned to one of his top enchanters and handed them a note.

"Take this to the Champion. She has been a great friend to the mages here and I hope she can help us again. Hurry!" The enchanter nodded and took off running, before the Templars could notice he was gone. "Maker help us." The mage made his way through the Gallow's courtyard and to the docks without notice. Once he reached the docks he ran head long into Cullen and Carver.

"Sim what are you doing down here?"

"Kn...Knight Captain, I'd heard you were gone."

"Not yet, I leave in the morning. What is wrong?"

"Meredith she's gone mad. She thinks we are hiding blood mages in the Gallows. She wants to search all the rooms and we fear she will..."

"Enact the Right of Annulment. She can't possibly think it has come to that."

"She is mad Ser Cullen. The First Enchanter has sent me to fetch the Champion. Hopefully she can stop Meredith." Raven had come out of the ship and overheard most of the conversation. She looked over to Velanna and nodded. The elf ran and headed for Hightown. It seemed the time had come and the plans they set into place had better work.

"I will go try to talk to her. Carver can you make sure this good man gets to your sister. I will see you soon."

"Be careful Cullen. Bethany will kill me if you get hurt or worse."

"I will friend."

"Well come on mage let's get to Hightown." "_Why can't anything be simple. Maker, I have a very bad feeling about this."_

OoO

"I have everyone here Hawke and most of your trunks have been taken to the docks."

"Thank you Varric. You didn't tell them why I wanted them here did you?"

"No that is your job. I don't think I could take the pouting face of Choir Boy and keep a straight face."

"Varric!"

'What? It's true, he is not going to be happy."

"I know, I really don't want to go out there."

"Courage Hawke it is not like we can't come visit you and Blondie. Ferelden is not that far away."

"Better get this over with." Leigh stepped out of her room and met her friends in her dining room. They were all gathered around the table like so many times before. Lump formed in her throat as she went and sat in her seat next to Anders. His hand found hers under the table and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

"It's alright love."

"Thank you all for coming at such short notice. We have something important to tell you."

"Can you make it sound more ominous Hawke? What is it?"

"Anders and I are going back to Ferelden...tomorrow."

"To visit?"

"No Aveline for good. I want to go back home."

"But tomorrow?"

"I know it is short notice, but I want to make sure Bethany is alright when she goes to Denerim. I also want to spend time with Carver. We have seven years to catch up on."

"It is just so sudden." Leigh saw the pain on everyone's faces and wanted to cry. They all looked so lost, Merrill especially.

"I know, I was planning it for a month from now, but we finished all we had to do so much sooner then planned. I have been honored to call each one of you family. It hurts to leave you."

"Then don't." She sighed knowing Sebastian would tell her to stay.

"I have to. I need to go home. It had not been for the Blight I never would have come here. I would still have been in Ferelden."

"So you leave in the morning then?'

"Yes Fenris."

"Hawke...is there anyway to talk you into staying?"

"No, we have decided this is what is best for us. I need to do this." Fenris got to his feet and walked over to her. She stood to meet him and was shocked when he hugged her.

"We will miss you."

"I will miss you too. I know with Danarius gone your safe. If you weren't I wouldn't dream of leaving."

"You have been a true friend."

"Then tonight is the last time we will all be together then. I say we got to the Hanged Man and drink ourselves into a oblivion."

"Sounds good Isabela. One last night of fun before leave. Drinks are on me."

"Be careful Hawke we might just make you broke before you even leave the city."

"It would be well worth it."

"So we will meet after sunset. Give you and Blondie a proper send off." Leigh smiled and saw all but one of her friends was smiling back at her. Sebastian just stared at the table. Leigh got up to talk to him, but the sound of the front door opening stopped her. She went to get Cullen and Carver to join them and found only Carver had returned with a mage in tow.

"Carver?"

"This mage has a message for you from Orsino. I think you'd better read it Leigh." She took the note and began reading. Her boil began to boil at every word. She set the letter down on her desk and leaned over it. Her entire body shook. "Sister?"

"She can't do this to them." Anders took the letter from her under her hands. He read it and slammed his fist down on her desk.

"Leigh we have to stop her. She will kill them."

"I know and I won't let her. Where is Cullen?"

"He went to see if he could talk her down."

"He will be lucky if she doesn't kill him too. We need to move."

"We are with you Hawke."

"Good, I need to go get my armor on, I will be back in a moment." She quickly changed into the set of mage armor her father had made for her years ago. She had made some improvements to it to protect vital areas. It gave her a better range of movement without messing with her ability to cast. Once she had ever strap in place she ran back down the stairs to the others who were ready to go. Anders had a distant look on his face, but she chalked it up to him trying to keep Justice is check. She silently walked passed her friends and headed out the door. She prepared herself that this was not going to end well, but Meredith had to be stopped before she hurt a lot of innocent mages.

"Hawke are you sure this is the right thing to do? Meredith must have her reasons for thinking there are blood mages in the Tower."

"It still does not mean she should have the right to kill all the mages for a the choice of a small few. It would be like killing every elf who was thought to be Dalish Sebastian."

"It is not the same thing."

"I am not going to fight with you right now about this. If you don't want to help then just go back to the Chantry. I am not in the mood today." Her tone and words stung, but Sebastian stayed with the group. The made it to the Gallows in record time only to have a mage run up to Leigh and tell her that Orsino went to see the Grand Cleric and Meredith followed to stop him. She had a feeling the two would end up tearing the city apart. Leigh hurried back toward Lowtown hoping she was not too late.

OoO

"Out of my way Meredith, the Grand Cleric will hear of this." The Knight Commander roughly grabbed the First Enchanter's arm and pulled him back.

"You will not involve her in this. I will search the Gallows, as is my right as Knight Commander." Leigh and her group ran up and the Templars with Meredith all turned swords drawn.

"What in the name of Andraste are you two doing?"

"This is no concern of yours Champion."

'Really, I seem to remember the safety of Kirkwall was my concern. If you two don't stop fighting, you will tear this city apart." The older woman let go of Orsino and stood toe to toe with Leigh. She tried staring the younger woman down, but Leigh did not even blink. "You don't scare me Meredith."

"I am trying to protect this city and her harbors blood mages in his ranks. I will not let them take their hold on Kirkwall."

"Blood magic it is all she sees. My people can not sneeze without her thinking there is blood magic is involved."

"You go to far Meredith. I will go and speak to the Grand Cleric on behalf of the mages. This has to stop. All the problems that have plagued this city of late are your fault. If you would treat the mages like people and not monsters you might not have so many turn to blood magic just to get away."

"It is clear which side you have taken."

"It had always been clear. My sister is a mage, my father was a mage. It does not work the way it is now. You blame the mages for their weakness...the weakness is yours and those like you."

"Then tell me another way to do this. It breaks my heart to have to be this hard on them, but they leave me know choice. I have to protect the people of Kirkwall from their curse." Leigh growled and stepped forward.

"It is not a curse. It is a gift, just like any other. It can be used to the best of it's possibility or can be wasted by using it for evil. Everyone else gets the choice why not mages?"

"Normal people do not destroy a place with just a thought or wave of the hand."

"I've seen plenty of people able to do just that without being mages."

"We could talk this in circles forever it does not change the fact that it is Chantry law that mages must be kept away from normal people."

"The Chantry is wrong!" The two women just glared at the other neither ready to back down at all. Anders felt Justice push and he knew it was time. Things had to change and change was a violent thing. With a deep breath he pulled his staff from his back and stepped forward. He sent a pulse of magic through the staff as he tapped it on the ground. Leigh spun around having felt the surge of power. The look on her face almost made him stop, but he couldn't. There was no turning back.

"Mages must have justice! We will not be held under the Chantry's heel anymore!" His staff forcibly tapped the ground a few more times and the blue glow of Justice shown through his skin.

"What have you done?" Orsino being a mage also felt the magic surge through the ground. His eyes went wide with confusion seeing the glowing in his eyes and skin.

"The Circle has failed us Orsino!"

"Anders what have you done?" He met Leigh's eyes and closed his eyes. The ground began to rumble beneath their feet. Everyone looked around and a red column of light tore through the middle of the Chantry. "_Oh love what did you do?"_ Leigh closed her eyes not wanting to see what was coming next.


	34. Chapter 34

"Come on everyone move!" Nathaniel Howe watched as the last of the people ran passed him. He could see his fellow Warden Velanna heading his way like a Archdemon was on her tail.

"Fall back this whole place is coming down!"

"Where's Raven?" Velanna looked back and frowned. "You left her?"

"She was right behind me with the Grand Cleric." Nathaniel went to take off down the tunnel again, but the elf stopped him. "There is no time Nate. The Chantry is coming down now."

"I can't just..." The sight of two women running toward them made him stop talking. He ran forward and picked up the older woman, throwing her over his shoulder, Raven right behind him as the tunnel collapsed behind them. Once the dust settled they looked back, the tunnel was nothing but rubble now. "Maker that was close."

"Too close, I swear I am going to skin that shem alive when I see him." Elthina just stared at the Wardens having no idea what had happened or why. Raven looked her over to make sure she had not injuries to speak of before hauling her to her feet.

"We need to move before the rest of this tunnel gives way. Velanna take Her Grace to the ship and make sure the others are alright as well. Nate and I need to find Hawke and get her out of the city."

"Wait on moment Warden Commander. I need to know what just happened. Why did you take us all out of the Chantry and why did this tunnel collapse?"

"A war is starting Your Grace. The mages have had enough and are fighting back. The Chantry here is Kirkwall is no more. It was blown up. That is why the tunnel collapsed and that is why we got you and your people out of there. We need to keep you safe."

"Why would...is this blood magic at work?"

"No, just a mage who has had enough of seeing their kind treated like monsters."

"I don not understand."

"I know and I want to help you understand. Please trust me Your Grace, you must go to the ship and stay there. This city is going to rip itself apart and you do not need to be in the crossfire."

"I...understand. Find the Champion, she can help stop this war."

'That is the plan Your Grace. Vel get her to the ship and set sail. Nate, Zev and I will have to find another way out of Kirkwall."

"Got it. Take care of yourselves. Creators guide you."

"And you as well Vel." Raven turned to the other two rogues and motioned for them to follow. "Nate, Zev, I want you two to head to the Gallows and help whoever you can. I need to find Anders."

"That is if he is still alive, Raven they will be out for his blood."

"I know more reason for us to hurry."

"Come Warden we have a job to do. It is not nice to question our lovely leader."

"Lead the way Crow." Zevran bowed and took the led while Raven headed the other way. She prayed that Anders was safe, but she knew it was a very big possibility that he was not. She had to find Hawke and make sure she at least got out of this alive as she promised Anders she would. She had yet to break a promise and she was not about to start now.

OoO

The sight of the Chantry turning into a red ball of death was now burned into Leigh's mind. Her eyes began to tear thinking about all the people that were most likely in it when it went up. She could heard the gasps and screams of both the Templars and her companions. None was louder than Sebastian's. Leigh could see Meredith's lips moving, but her brain could not understand the words. She felt her brother shake her to snap her out of her stupor.

"Leigh!" She could see the Templars stepping closer to Anders and she shook of her shock.

"What have you done?"

"The Circle has failed us Orsino. It is either a quick death now or a slow death later. I for one would rather go down fighting. It has to stop, the world has to see."

"You did this mage?" Meredith's voice was like ice and her hand went to her sword. "Do you see now Champion that mages have not right to be among the rest of the world. They have no control."

"Do not blame mages for this Templar. It has been a long time coming." Leigh's companions stared at her. She voice was flat and dead, but her eyes were alive with fury. "You did this, not them. Your arrogance and cruelty forced his hand."

"Has this blood mage enthralled you?" A evil chuckle echoed off the buildings around them. Leigh just shook her head and stepped closer to the Knight Commander.

"No one enthralls me. I have my own opinions on the matter and I believe that mages should be free."

"I should expect no less from a Ferelden. Even your King has a bleeding heart for mages. The Divine will wipe your country of the face of Thedas."

"Only if she lives to try."

"You dare..."

"I dare anyone to threaten my family or my home. Right now the only threat I see is you Meredith. Now call off your men or you will be sorry."

"Kill them all and meet us at the Gallows." For a woman in full armor Meredith was fast. Her Templars formed ranks to cover her retreat.

"Coward, Orsino ready your mages. You will not fight alone."

"Thank you Champion, fall back to the Gallows, warn the others. We must prepare." Leigh made sure not to engage the Templars til she was sure the mages had escaped. Her siblings stood on her side and Anders the other. She was furious at him for what he did, but now was not the time to fight about it. Leigh could see Sebastian trying to get close enough to Anders to use the work knife in his hand.

"_He has murder on his mind Leigh." "I know, and I understand why. Elthina was like a mother to him. Maker this is horrible." "It is the price of freedom, innocents die. He will try to force you to kill Anders." "I know." "What will you do?" _Leigh spun and put herself between Anders and Sebastian. The battle did not last long as the Templars were outnumbered. Anders stood behind her staring at Sebastian, waiting for him to make a move.

"I demand justice for the deaths of the faithful Hawke."

"I understand, but I will not let you hurt him."

"You would protect this creature, he killed the Grand Cleric. A woman who was kind to you, helped you...please Hawke you can't let him live." Blue eyes pleaded with her and it broke her heart to see how lost he looked. Deep down she did love the man, but her love for Anders eclipsed everything. Her hand went to her stomach and she took a deep breath.

"To kill him would be to kill myself Sebastian."

"He is a murderer!"

"So am I and so are you."

"I...it is not the same thing."

"Isn't it? You a man of faith are going to stand here and tell me this is not the same bloody thing Andraste did to free herself and her kin. Change comes with the blood of the innocent Sebastian. It is the way of things."

"Andraste did not..."

"Yes she did, it was war Sebastian, just like this. You don't think she killed innocent people to get what she wanted. She was mortal, human and flawed just like the rest of us."

"He must pay for what he has done!"

"One day he will, but that is for the Maker to decided not you. I will not kill the man I love for doing something I wholeheartedly support."

"What? You support what he has done?"

"Yes I do. My family has many mages in it and all save one has been ripped away from their family, forced into the Circle and has had to contend with abuses far greater than anyone should ever have to face. You have no idea what they go through and the Grand Cleric stood by and did not try to stop it."

"Your blaming her? She tried to make the mages see reason, they did not listen."

"Oh the mages had to see reason, why not the Templars? Meredith did this, stop hiding behind Chantry bullshit and open your eyes. It is wrong to cage a person whose only crime was being born with magic. None of the mages asked for their powers, most would tell you they don't want them. The Chantry has turned it into a curse not a gift, it is sickening." Sebastian glared at Anders and tightened his grip on his dagger.

"If you won't kill him Hawke I will." Leigh drew her blades and dropped into a defensive position.

"You will have to kill me to get to him."

"Get out of the way I don't...I can't hurt you."

"I don't want to hurt you either Sebastian, but I will not let you kill him."

"Then I return to Starkhaven. I will take back my land and bring an army to wipe Kirkwall off the map. I will hunt your precious Anders and you if you get in my way."

"If that is the way it has to be then go. Just don't let your thirst for revenge hurt your people or the desire demon will be right. You will become what you hate."

"And what of you Hawke? What will you become?"

"I will be what I always have been Sebastian, a protector, a vanguard of mages. It is who I am and who I will always be." The prince searched her eyes and knew he could not fight her. She was far more skilled then he and his heart would not let him raise his hands to her. "For what it is worth I am sorry Sebastian."

"I am too. Good...Goodbye Hawke, I hope to never have to..."

"I know." He gave one last glare to the blonde mage and took his leave. Leigh's friends all turned to her as she faced Anders. Her blades still drawn a poised to end it if she had to. "Why?"

"There is nothing you can say that I haven't already said to myself Leigh. I took a spirit into my soul and changed us both forever. I...this had to be done, we have to be free."

"You could have told me, I might have understood."

"You would have been honor bound to stop me, I wanted your hands clean of this. I...I was afraid you would have..."

"Stopped loving you? Maker Anders are you that thick?" He looked up from the ground and saw her eyes held no judgment. "This is your war love and I will not fight it without you."

"I...Leigh you can't fight, not while your..."

"So I am to leave people defenseless against Meredith and her cronies? How long have you known me? This is as much my fight as it is yours." She walked over and picked up his staff that had been knocked away while fighting the Templars. She thrust it into his hands but not before sending a bolt of lightning at a Templar Hunter who had tried to sneak up on them. Fenris was the only one of her companions that did not know she was a mage. His expression was a mixture of shock and anger.

"Fenris I will not ask you to follow us. I know how you feel about mages and what has been done to you by them. Not all of us are like your former master, but there are too many that are. The choice is yours, I will not think lesser of you if you want to walk away or even help the Templars."

"You have hidden your magic for this long?"

"It is a very long story and one we do not have time to tell. I was born a mage, but learned other skills. Just because I have magic doesn't mean I have to use it." Fenris smiled.

"You are the first mage I have ever heard say those words. You have helped me, protected me, how can I abandon you now? I will fight with you Hawke not against you."

"Thank you my friend. We need to move. Carver I want you, Ori and Isabela to go get the ship ready."

"I guess it was a good thing we killed Castillon then."

"He should never have come after you Isabela. He was warned."

"Guess the Knight Commander did not get the jest of your warning either."

"No, she didn't. I hope I can still try to talk her down, but my hopes aren't high about it."

"We will get through this Hawke, we always do."

"I hope so. Just be careful out there all of you. I don't want to lose any more than we already have." Leigh's hand entwined with Anders' as she watched her brother and friends disappear into the smoke. "We need to get to the Gallows. The mages are counting on us to protect them."

OoO

"Shit, what were they thinking?" Anders stood in the middle of a group of what once was mages. They had turned into abominations and attacked the group as they made their way to the docks.

"Stay alive at all costs. Most of them were young mages love they never stood a chance against the Templars." Leigh saw the pain in his eyes, this is not what he wanted. He wanted freedom, but was not prepared for the price of it. "We could not save them Anders, but there are those that we can. We must keep moving." He nodded and moved on silently.

"Hawke over here!" Leigh spun daggers drawn, but nearly dropped them when she saw the woman in front of her.

"Asha? Maker what are you doing here?"

"I was passing through, and got caught in the middle of all this. I see you are still quick."

"I had a good teacher." Asha was holding her side and winced a bit when she laughed at Leigh. "Your hurt."

"I will live, the one I fought wasn't so lucky. He got a nice hole were his neck should be."

"Anders can you heal her?"

"It should only take a moment the cut isn't deep." Asha stood still while Anders sent a healing spell into her side. "There good as new."

"Must be nice having your own healer, comes in handy."

"He is much more than that Asha." The older woman looked back and forth between the two and smiled.

"You are your mother's daughter."

"Are you going to introduce us love?"

"Sorry, yes. Asha this is Anders my...soulmate for lack of a better term and Anders this is Asha, she is the one who taught me to use my rogue skills."

"It is nice to meet you Anders."

"You as well."

"Hawke, I hate to even ask this, but are you involved in this?" Asha waves her hands around to the carnage they were standing in.

"Yes, why?"

"Just wondering, it seems like something you would have a hand in that's all. Your father would be proud."

"He would have been right in the middle of all this."

"Malcolm would have been in his glory." Asha looked ahead of them and saw more Templars and mages clashing. "I think we should move, those mages are being over taken. I will tag along, safety in numbers."

"Your help would be most welcome." Anders was impressed at the agility of the older woman. She was deadly with her daggers, it came as no surprise to Anders this woman was Leigh's teacher. Something about her moves was familiar other than what he had seen Leigh do, he just could not place it. He did not no how long it took them to wade through the waves of Templars that kept coming at them. The last batch was dispatched faster with the help of a group of Circle mages. The group was tired and bloody, but they kept pressing on. Anders hoped Isabela and Carver had made it to the ship. He had a feeling they would need to make a quick getaway.

OoO

"It's just a bit farther." Carver, Isabela and Ori had made it to the docks and where now running full bore to the ship.

"I really fucking hate this Maker forsaken city, the sooner we can get out of here the better."

"You Fereldans are all alike, such homeland bodies."

"Give me mud and dog shit any day over Templars and demons."

"Are you sure your related to your sister? She doesn't complain as much as you do."

"Oh yes she does, your just not around to hear it. Ask Anders, he'll tell you."

"Little pup has teeth I see."

"I'm not a pup anymore."

"But your not the big dog yet." Carver just growled and looked back to where he thought his wife would be. When he did not see her he stopped running. Isabela stopped too and started looking around for the elven mage. "Where is she?"

"Ori! This is no time to play hide and seek." A low evil laugh sounded off the walls and Carver's blood ran cold.

"There is only one person I want to seek boy and you know where he is." Addler had Ori by the throat and had a dagger to her side. Carver snarled, but did not move. The fear in his wife's eyes held him to the spot.

"You hurt her I swear I will rip you apart."

"Where is Anders?"

"Who?"

"Don't play dumb with me boy, I know you were staying at the Champion's home. He is rumored to be her lover, so I will ask again where is he?" The dagger tip poked into Ori's side and she whimpered. "Tell me or your pretty little elf will be the new sheath for my daggers."

"I don't know who the hell your talking about or I would tell you were he is. Now let her go!" The dagger dug in deeper and now Ori yelped in pain. "Stop it."

"Tell me."

"How can I tell you when I don't know?"

"Your pirate friend there knows, blame her for your slut getting hurt."

"Why don't you pick on someone your own size coward. Duel me and if you win I will tell you what you want."

"I am not foolish, I know of your reputation. Do you think I would not find out who the Champion's friends are and what they are capable of?"

"So you are a well informed coward then, good to know. Let the little elf go and leave Kirkwall. You go up against Hawke and she will tear you apart. You don't stand a chance."

"Neither do you." A small group of Templars surrounded Carver and Isabela. "Tie them up, they will be the bait. I have a feeling the Champion is trying to leave by ship. If so she and Anders will be heading right our way. When they get here we will be ready." Carver wanted to fight them off, but Addler still had a death grip on Ori, Isabela even dropped her weapons with a defeated look.

"When the Champion gets through with you there won't be enough of you to send back to the Divine." Addler just sneered at Carver as he threw Ori to the ground.

"Your lucky I have already had her or I would make you watch."

"Touch her and I swear..."

"Gag him, I don't need him tipping off our prey. I have been waiting a long time for this."

OoO

"We are getting closer Hawke. Once we get to the docks we can take a ferry to the Gallows."

"Aveline you don't have to..."

"You and I have been through hell and back since Lothering. I am not going to leave you to fight this alone. Your doing the right thing."

"You have been a true friend Aveline. What ever happens I am honored to have been able to call you friend."

"The honor is all mine Leigh."

"Now I know you think this is an impossible fight to win, you are calling me by my name."

"Just trying it on for size, so years from now I can say I knew her well."

"Depending on how this turns out you might not want to say you knew me. It might get you in a lot of trouble."

"With you Hawke there is always trouble. Ah, finally, we should take this slow. Too many places for Templars to hide."

"Slow it is." Leigh reached her hand back and felt Anders put his hand in hers. "Stay close."

"Love you should get on the ship and go."

"Not on your life Anders. You might have started this, but I will finish it. It has to stop. She can't get away with this. Those mages had nothing to do with what you did."

"That is not entirely true, some of them did help me."

"How?"

"They helped me gather the ingredients I needed to make the blast."

"And I helped you by distracting the Grand Cleric so you could plant it."

"Leigh...I am so sorry. I never wanted you involved in this."

"How could you think I would let you do this alone?"

"Your important, a figure head. I am expendable." Leigh frowned and shook her head.

"I swear what is it with the men I fall for? You are not expendable. I need you, our children need you. I don't want to do this alone. So whether you want me to or not, I am fighting. For you, for me, for our children's future, I will not give up on that."

"I know better than to argue with you. Just don't try to be heroic. The last time did not turn out so well."

"I'm still here aren't I?"

"Only by the grace of the Maker."

"A little grace goes a long way."

"What did you mean by the men you fell for?"

"Do we have to go there now?"

"Yes."

"The first man I loved was an apostate. He did the noble thing and turned himself in to the Templars so they did not get their hands on me. I was trying to get him out of Ferelden after he ran away from the Circle."

"How did end up helping him?" Anders knew full well how she ended up helping him all those years ago, but he wanted to hear her say it.

"He happened to be running by my family's farm. I saw Templars running after him and I went to help. In hindsight it was foolish, but I could not stand by and let them hurt him. After I got him away I took him home. My father gave him supplies to leave the next morning, but the Templars weren't alone and we had to run. We spent weeks together trying to shake them, but they finally caught up with us in Denerim. He did not want them to take me away too so he turned himself in. It broke my heart."

"I am sorry love, what was his name? Maybe I knew him."

"Leo."

"I knew him."

"Did...did he survive the..."

"He did, lucky bastard was in solitary when it happened." "_Just tell her Anders." "Not like this. If we survive this I will tell her." _

"So they never hurt him."

"No."

"Good, I...it's silly, but I am happy he is alright or was back then. I loved him and he will always have a place in my heart."

"No one can fault you for that. We all have people in our pasts that stay with us. I am in no way jealous if a part of you still loves him. I have no right to be."

"I love you, you know that right?"

"I do, and I love you." They headed deeper into the docks. It was eerily quiet, too quiet. Leigh scanned the open areas and saw nothing, but she knew this would be a perfect place for an ambush.

"I don't like this." Varric stepped up beside Anders and looked around as well.

"Ambush?"

"Ambush, Aveline you and Asha take Bethany, Merrill and go that way. The rest of us will go the other way. Beth stay close to Asha."

"Do you think it is wise to split up?"

"No, but if they corner all of us we will have a harder time getting out. Being split up the other team can come to the Ambushed teams rescue."

"What if both teams are ambushed?"

"Let's just hope that doesn't happen Fenris. We will meet at ferry point." Leigh watched her sister walk away and her heart clenched a bit. Anders squeezed her shoulder and gave her a reassuring smile.

"She will be alright. Aveline won't let anyone touch her."

"I'm worried about all of them. This is not Asha's fight. She is risking her life to help us."

"She knows the risks as well as the rest of us do Leigh. She is doing what is right." She nodded and took the lead of her team. Varric took up the rear position and Fenris stayed close to Leigh weapon drawn. Anders stayed back with Varric. "I have a very bad feeling about this."

"Good, I thought it was just me. I hope Hawke knows what she is doing Blondie."

"I hope so too." Leigh stuck to the shadows. Pash whispered in her head telling her there were Templars ahead as if she did not know. She had always been able to tell if some were close by. She held up her hand for the group to stop. When she peeked around the corner she wanted to scream. There right in front of the ferry was Carver tied and gagged. Isabela was also tied up , but not gagged and Ori who was not tied up at all. She could see the dark mark on Ori's side and it did not look good. The elf's color was getting paler by the moment. Leigh could also feel the effects of a silence and mana drain spell surrounding the pier.

Carver struggled against his bindings. He could see the red plume of blood getting larger and his wife's robes. Her skin was covered with a sheen of sweat and her teeth were clenched in pain. Fear made him fight harder to break free. He felt something sharp bite into his skin and he turned to see Isabela was cutting into his bindings with a small sharp piece of metal.

"Hold still and try not to give it away." He stilled his movements and waited. The Templars stood too close for him to make a move. He prayed help was coming soon, Ori was not going to make it if it didn't. Leigh growled from her hiding spot when she saw the leader of the Templars. It was the same man she had met in the Deep Roads, the man who was hunting Anders. With a swift motion to Varric she vanished into the shadows.

"What is she doing?" Anders voice came out in a hiss to the dwarf.

"She is going to...shit she is going to get herself killed. There are at least eight Templars there and who knows how many in hiding." The ground began to shake under the Templars feet. They looked around wildly trying to figure out what was going on.

"Hold your ground! Their spells can't harm us. Mages are weak."

"Only someone who does not understand mages would call us weak Templar!" Addler drew his blade and held his ground.

"Show yourself coward!" A low rolling laugh echoed around the pier. A flash of lightning barely missed the man.

"That was a warning. I am no coward, but I know you are. You use your position to abuse my kind. You hide behind your oath and shield. Your friend Rolan was no different."

"Your kind is a curse mage. Give us Anders and I will give you a quick death."

"It is you who will have a quick death." Leigh caught most of the Templars in the red tendrils of magic she called forth, but Addler was a slippery one. He was strong too, Leigh surmised it was from the taint in his blood. She had learned from Anders that it made the Wardens harder to kill and quicker than most.

"Let them go or I will slit her throat!" Addler had hauled Isabela to her feet and had his dagger to her throat.

"Don't give into him!" Leigh heard Isabela gasp when Addler pulled hard on her hair to shut her up.

"Shut up you slut, show yourself or I will kill her." Leigh was about to step out of her hiding place when she saw Anders in the clearing. He had dropped his staff and was walking toward Addler.

"It's me you want, let her go."

"Well, well it is true, you are alive."

"Rolan wasn't much of a challenge. He begged for his life when I killed him. Soiled himself too." Addler threw Isabela aside and ran at Anders. With one motion of his hand Anders had Addler bowled over with a force spell. "You should have never come after me."

"It is my job to take down creatures like you. You should have been made Tranquil when they brought you back from Denerim, but Gregior was soft and listened to Irving and Wynne. I would have gutted you in the city square as a message to the witch that helped you."

"If you had tried she would have flattened the city. Rolan and the others had no idea what they were dealing with. You still don't." Leigh stopped dead.

"_What is he talking about?" _

"The girl that helped me spared Rolan and the others and do you know what he promised her? He said he would never hurt a mage again, guess his words meant nothing since he went on to hurt more mages than I can count. She tried to teach him that even your worse enemy can show compassion and he did not learn the lesson. He got what he deserved." Leigh's hand flew to her mouth to stifle a cry.

"_How did I not see? Maker he has been with me all this time...why didn't he tell me?" "He was afraid to let you see what he had become." 'You knew?" "I had my suspicions. I wasn't involved in your adventure remember. I did not get a feel for the man in the short time he was around you." "That fucking bastard will not take him from me. I think it is time to end this." "My thoughts exactly. Show him what a true mage can do." "With pleasure."_

"I am going to gut you Anders!" Anders crouched into a fighting position and waved Addler on. His hands flared with a fire spell and he gave Addler a wicked smile.

"Hey Addler!" Both men turned and saw Leigh standing near her now free brother. Her eyes were glowing red and her hands were pulsing with fire and electricity. "Back off or I will do to you what I didn't do to Rolan all those years ago. I was merciful then, but not so much now." Her magic struck him hard in the chest when he lunged at Anders. His body spun in the air and landed hard ten feet away. When he did not get up Leigh turned to Anders and ran to him. She slammed into him hard enough to knock him off his feet.

"I seem to remember you liked knocking me to the ground back then Dove." Leigh sob and laughed at the same time. Anders sat up and pulled her against his chest.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I figured it out when we saved you from the Carta. I...was afraid..." Leigh let out a nervous giggle remembering something he had said down in the Deep Roads.

"You were right."

"About what?"

"You were thicker back then Mo Anam Cara." Anders smiled and kissed her forehead before a movement caught his eye. Addler stood over them badly burned but alive. His sword raised to slash through both mages.

"Should have made sure I was dead." He lifted the sword and Anders twisted Leigh out of it's reach. A sudden wet sound made Anders open his eyes. He saw Addler's body pitch forward with twin daggers stuck in his sides.

"I told you Addler you don't mess with my Wardens."

"Raven?"

"Well I did warn him, to not hunt you. It's his fault for not listening and for not sensing me sneak up on him. Are you two alright?" Raven held out both hands and lifted the lovers off the ground.

"Fine now, wait Ori." Anders turned back to where he had last seen his friend bleeding to death and breathed a sigh of relief seeing her on her feet and healed. Carver had his arms wrapped around her possessively as tears tracked down his face. Bethany just winked and smiled at her sister and Anders. Ori was staring at the still bleeding and burnt form of Addler. She pulled away from Carver and stepped closer. Her eyes were filled with sadness and a bit of joy. The man who had tormented her for years had finally paid for his crimes, but it did not heal what he had done to her. Anders came up behind her and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "He can't hurt you anymore Ori."

"I know, but...it is just sad that he was so cruel."

"Some people know no other way."

"Promise me you will never be like that. I know you hate Templars, but don't become like them."

"I can't make that promise Ori, but I can tell you that Leigh will never let me get to that point."

'He's right I won't." Ori hugged Leigh and cried. "I told you the Hawke family sticks together. Your one of us Ori."

"You could have ripped him apart with you magic. Why didn't you?"

"He wasn't worth it. It would prove him right and I wasn't about to let that happen." Varric looked at the other Templars still strung up by Leigh's magic and shook his head.

'What about them Hawke?"

"They are going to hang around a while. Merrill if you would please." Merrill rubbed her hands together and called forth entangling roots to cinch up the Templars. Once they were secure Leigh turned back to her friends. "Carver I want you and Bethany to go with Isabela. You too Ori. Help her with the ship."

"Leigh you are going to need us."

"Carver your wife almost got killed because of Anders and myself. I want you safe, please I can't lose you again."

"And what if I don't want to lose you either. I am going whether you like it or not." Asha cleared her throat making Leigh turn to her.

"I will help get the ship up and running for your escape."

"Thank you Asha."

"Raven, you staying or going?"

"Staying, I have a few choice words for Meredith myself."

"Say something about the King did she?"

"Yes."

"Maker help her." Leigh looked across to the Gallows and swallowed hard. Her hand went right to her stomach and she closed her eyes. "_We will make it through this little ones. I swear you both will be born with your father by my side."_

"Love?"

"Just thinking. We need to move. Defend the mages and get Cullen. After that we head away from here."

"I can hide you in Ferelden."

"You would help us after what..."

"Yes, I never abandon my own even when they do something so utterly...I can't even find a word to describe what you did Anders. Just know your friends will help you."

"Commander, I...thank you. I know you are taking a grave risk..."

"Let me worry about that. Shall we?" Isabela, Ori and Asha watched the others board the ferry and head to the Gallows.

"I hope you know how to set a sail Ori?"

"I'll set the sail Isabela, Ori should rest. I know my way around a ship."

Good, because there is no way I am letting Hawke down by not being ready. We'd better hurry."

OoO

The time on the ferry seemed like forever as the group sat in silence. As they pasted out of the fog and smoke the Gallows came into view. Leigh could see bodies lining the stairs up the to main courtyard. Some armored and some robed. Her stomach lurched and she tipped herself over the side of the ferry. She felt Anders' hand on her back rubbing it in slow circles, the other held her hair out of the the way. When she was sure she was done Leigh wiped her mouth on her cloak and leaned back into her lover.

"After this morning I didn't think I would have anything left in there to spew out." Aveline gave her a worried glance and opened her mouth to speak.

"Hawke are you sick?"

"No."

"Then why have you been throwing up these past few days?"

"Nerves?" The older woman stared at her and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Try again Hawke." Leigh sighed and looked back at Anders. He just shrugged and looked away.

"Your a lot of help you know." A bark of laughter was her only answer. "I am pregnant and my getting sick is morning sickness."

"And your fighting? Hawke your insane."

"You've known me how long and haven't figured that out. I have to Aveline, the mages don't stand a chance without help." Aveline looked at the others and met each ones gaze.

"If you insist on fighting then you will, but at a distance. It is time to use your magic not your blades."

"But..." Aveline held up her hand to silence her friend.

"No buts, I will not let you risk your life and that of your baby to fight a tyrannical Templar. I owe you more than I can ever repay. Anders I am counting on you to keep her out of the fight."

"I'll try, but you know how stubborn she is."

"Just do your best." The ferry finally made it to the Gallows. The sounds of screams and fires roaring filled the air. Leigh ran up the stairs ahead of the others and watched a Templar fly through the air landing at her feet. Orsino stood at the top[ of the stairs in front of his fellow mages. The remaining Templars moved forward slowly weapons drawn. Leigh shouted and they spun to meet her. Her hands began to glow with a spell and she felt the Templars try to drain her mana. She could feel it weaken a bit, but not enough to stop the spell.

"Sleep!" Her hand waved and the Templars fell to their knees before falling over. Orsino stared at her mouth agape and eyes wide. Leigh heard Varric curse and she turned around.

"Meredith is coming Hawke!" Leigh let her magic seep back into her skin and drew her blades. Once the Templar was at the top of the stairs Leigh went to meet her followed closely by Orsino.

"There is still time to stop this Meredith, before the city is torn apart." The Knight Commander's eye fell on Anders and she snarled.

"You let the monster that killed the Grand Cleric live?"

"I've let you live too and your more a monster then he will ever be. Now stop this before more innocent lives are lost."

"I will entertain a surrender nothing more."

"But we did not do this! You can't kill us for something we did not do." Orsino's anger was now building.

"The people will want retribution and I will give it to them. Go ready your people Orsino, I am waiting on the rest of my order to cross the bay." Meredith turned and went back down to the pier to wait for her reinforcements. Orsino yelled to his people to run inside and prepare. As the group ran through the building Orsino could not help himself and asked Leigh the question that was burning in his mind.

"Your a mage?"

"Yes, but I hide it well."

"This is why you have helped the mages since you got to Kirkwall."

"I would have help even if I had not been a mage. It is the right thing to do. Orsino I will not let her slaughter you all. She had no idea what I can do."

"I fear this is a hopeless battle, but we have a chance with you and your friends here to help. Go talk to your people and I will prepare mine. When you are done come and talk to me." Leigh nodded and turned to her friends. They were tired, but determined.

"Well Varric, this is it."

"It has been an honor Hawke, but no goodbyes. I'm not so sure we should be doing this, but I know why you are. This will make for on hell of a story down the road."

"You are a good friend Varric. See you on the other side of this."

"Aveline?"

"You do have a habit of getting us all into trouble."

"I'm sorry, this is not how I wanted it."

"I know, it is worth it. I see now that if you had wanted to back then you could have killed Wesley for his threat on your sister, but you didn't. Why?"

"He was just doing his job. I understood that. I saw no malice in his eyes when he made that threat. Not all Templar are cruel, Wesley was one of the good ones."

Yes he was. We will win this Hawke, I know it." Leigh talked to Fenris, Merrill and Raven before going to her siblings.

"Beth are you alright?"

"I so worried about Cullen. I..."

"I know he is alright Beth. Cullen is a strong fighter and smart. I am sure he is trying to keep the peace out there."

"I hope so."

"Carver are you ready for this?"

"No, but it beats fighting darkspawn right. At least Templars can't taint your blood. Leigh, Papa would be proud. Let's show that bitch what happens when you mess with a Hawke."

"Oh she will get hers alright, just be careful out there."

"Your the one who needs to be careful sis. I want to see those kids of yours born safe and healthy" Leigh hugged her brother quickly and went to talk to her last companion. Anders stood staring out at the mages huddled together. Most were barely out of adolescence. His stomach turned at the thought they would not see the dawn because of him.

"Leo?" His really name took him by surprise, but he smiled at his lover and drew her close against him. "We can do this."

"I should have trusted you...I …..I was trying to make sure you were never tied to this. I loved you too much."

"I understand, but your not alone in this now." His arms tightened around her and he kissed her forehead. "I still can't believe I didn't see it was you."

'I have changed quite a bit Dove."

"You have no idea how much I missed that nickname. Though I will say you aren't as handsy as you once were." A feral smile graced Anders' lips and he leaned down to growl in her ear.

"Wait til we get out of this." Leigh shook her head smiling at him while she stood up on her toes so their lips could meet. The kiss was slow and sweet. Both could feel their mana mingling with the others. "I'm not letting them tear us apart again Leigh. I have eight years to make up for. I plan on spending the rest of my time left making it up to you."

"First we need to end this. Then I will be happy to let you make it up to me for the next twenty or more years. I am hoping more."

"Maker willing. We will always be on the run love. Are you ready for that type of life?"

"If I am with you I am ready for anything." She took his hand and led him to Orsino to go over their plan. Outside she hear a battering ram hitting the entry doors and knew they were running out of time. One way or another this was going to end and soon.


	35. Chapter 35

Wave after wave of Templars came into room only to be taken down quickly. The floor of the Gallows was slick with blood from both sides, but the Templars faired much worse than the mages. Leigh kept her promise to Aveline and did not jump into the thick of the fight. She only used her blades when one of the aggressors got through the front line. Bethany and Anders stood in the very back casting healing spells to keep the warriors on their feet. Varric was the covering fire stopping many of the Templars before they even got to far in the room. The battle went on like this for what seemed like hours. Some of the mages let their fear get the better of them and they ran right into the Templars. They did not last long. Once the fighting stopped the the death toll was taken.

"They should just drown us as infants. It is much better than this. Why give us a false hope?"

"This is not the end Orsino. We will not let them kill all of you."

'What does it matter, if we live through this they will just hunt us down and kill us later."

"Not if I have anything to say about it." The elven mage gave Leigh a disbelieving look and turned away. "Please don't give up."

"I will not sit here and let them kill me in cold blood Champion. I told Quentin his research was too dangerous, but maybe he had the right idea."

"What? You can't mean that. That man killed my mother, blood magic is wrong. You are justifying their fear if you use it."

"And what would you have me do Champion? I have never been free like you have. You have no right to judge me!"

"I would have you fight, survive, spread the word to the other Circles. Let them know what happened here, that the Templars can be defeated if we rise up and take the fight to them. Meredith will be stopped Orsino, you can't give up hope now, not when your mages need you."

"I...there is no hope left." Leigh tried to open her mouth when he took out his dagger,but her voice got lost in the sight of his blood. She could feel the evil pouring into the spell. It wreaked of hopelessness and hate. Pash recoiled in her head right before the bodies of the fallen mages started moving. What happened next would haunt the minds of all that witnessed it for years to come. The call of the blood magic pulled the bodies onto Orsino. His form twisted into a freakish creature.

"Maker have mercy." Leigh backed away from the monster her hands glowing with flame. She looked over her shoulder and saw Templars storming into the room. "Shit, Varric slow them down!"

'Got it." A hail of arrows made the Templars stop their charge enough for Leigh to put up a barrier. The abomination snarled at her and lunged forward.

"Leigh, move!" Anders jumped in front of her and let loose a ice storm to slow the monster down. Fenris and Carver charged forward to cut the creature down. Aveline put herself in front of Leigh to deflect any attack made on her. Skeletons started to rise from the ground under their feet. Merrill screamed as one grabbed her ankle and pulled her down to the ground. Varric rushed to her side and slammed the butt of Bianca into it's head.

"Stay close Daisy."

"Hawke, behind you!" Leigh rolled to the left and lashed out with her daggers shattering the skeleton that was trying to sneak up on her. Raven jumped up onto Orsino and dug her blades into his back. Fenris attacked his lower body trying to take out his legs. The monster stumbled a bit and Leigh took her opening. She ran as fast as she could and launched herself at the abomination. She grabbed the sides of it's head and pulled. Her teeth were gritted as she pulled til she heard a wet crunch. She threw the shriveled, twisted body to the ground and jumped down after it. It hissed and snapped at her. Leigh growled and stomped her foot on it's head. The sickening wet sound echoed off the walls of the room.

"Love are you alright?" Anders looked her over to make sure she had no injuries. His hands lastly fell to her abdomen to check on the twins.

"Just really pissed off. It is such a waste."

"He was afraid."

"I know...it just..."

"Not everyone has your courage. His fear of death and the unknown drove him to use blood magic. No one is to blame for this least of all you."

"The unknown?"

"Most mages have never lived outside of the Circle Leigh. They can't function out in the world. I was lucky, I had you all those years ago. I would have died out on my own in the Wilds. I could survive better now, but that is because of years of training and learning."

"Then that is what we need to teach them. To survive, to thrive. It is the only way this will change."

"First let's survive this then we can plan on helping mages around Thedas. We still have Meredith to deal with." Leigh sighed and leaned her head against Anders' shoulder. "We will be alright Leigh."

"I hope so. I love you."

"I know Dove, I love you always." Anders turned to the others, staring into each ones eyes. They were tired, but determined. He knew their loyalty was mostly for Leigh, but he didn't care. He did not need them to fight for him or even like him. As long as they protected Leigh he was happy.

"Hawke we are ready." Leigh turned her self to face her friends, but stayed leaning against Anders. The feeling of his arms around her gave her strength.

"It stops here. Meredith and those like her will know that their reign is at an end. This is not just for mages, but for anyone who has been treated like they have no worth. Everyone of us is the same in the eyes of the Maker."

"I don't know about the Maker Hawke, but you have always treated us like equals. We are with you to the end and beyond."

"You are my equal Fenris. You all are. I never would have made it this far without all of you. Whatever happens please know that you are all my family. I love you all."

"Then what are we waiting for let's show that bitch what happens when you mess with our family." Leigh could not help but laugh at sweet soft spoken Merrill saying such a thing. She stepped forward and hugged the Dalish elf.

"Your right Merrill let us show her that our family will not let this stand." All of the companions nodded and followed her to the main gate of the Gallows. They met some groups of Templars, but none gave them much trouble. Once they got closer to the main gate Leigh could heard Meredith barking orders. She growled wanting nothing more than to tear the older woman apart for what she had done here. It would not be long now.

OoO

"Knight Commander most of our men have been..."

"Defeated." Meredith wheeled around and saw Leigh with dagger drawn and her companions at her back. "It is over Meredith, surrender."

"No, Champion it is you who will surrender. You willingly aided a murderer and killed countless Templars. I will have your head next to his on a pike."

"I don't think so. This is your doing. You pushed the mages til there no way out for them, but to fight back. Every death here is on your hands not mine. I tried to keep the peace and you would have none of it."

"You are no mage, why fight for them?" Leigh gave Meredith a wicked smile and called a fireball to her out stretched hand.

"I am a mage. You had an apostate under your nose the entire time and you never knew. Some Templar you are."

"Malificar!"

"You wouldn't know a real blood mage if it came up and bit you on the ass Meredith. I am no malifcar. Just a mage who wants freedom and peace." The Knight Commander took a step back and drew her sword.

"_That sword, it is made of corrupted lyrium." "It is glowing like the idol from the Deep Roads" "I think it is the idol from the Deep Roads."_

"You recognize it don't you. I paid that dwarf a fortune for it, but it was worth it. This will be the weapon that ends this."

"It drove Bartrand mad, Meredith. It is effecting you as well. That idol was pure evil."

"It is a gift from the Maker. It has given me strength enough to cull this mage uprising." Leigh heard the clank of armor marching up behind Meredith. She breathed a sigh of relief when she saw Cullen and at least a dozen other Templars behind him. With him was young Keran the boy she had saved years ago and knew these Templars were against the Knight Commander.

"Enough Commander, step away from the Champion. I am taking you into custody for the deaths of the innocent."

"You know as well as I do Ser Cullen that mages are not innocent."

"Some of them were Knight Commander. I am here about the innocent people that died because of your poor choice. The people of Kirkwall were yours to protect and you unleashed both Templars and desperate mages out into the streets. Most of the bodies I have seen were killed by swords not magic. Your fear and inability to lead killed those people, their blood is on your hands. No stand down or I will have no choice, but to use force."

"You dare threaten me boy. I knew when I saw you that you were a bleeding heart. I even knew about you taking that whore as your lover and I turned a blind eye, hoping you would come to your senses when you were done with her." Leigh, Carver and Cullen growled in unison when Meredith pointed to Bethany. "You have fallen under a blood mage's spell, my own Knight Captain. If you will not help me quell this insurrection then I wil have no choice but to kill you. This woman and her murdering companion will die by my hand."

"Then you will have to go through me to do it." Cullen placed himself between Meredith and Leigh, sword drawn and shield ready. "You will not harm another mage Meredith."

"Foolish boy, you are throwing your life away for what, that?" Again she pointed to Bethany who was now glaring at the woman.

"Bethany is a warm, wonderful woman, something you know nothing about you frigid fucking bitch! Now surrender you are out numbered and out classed. You have no idea what you are dealing with."

"You will be the first to die Cullen." Meredith backed herself away from the group and Cullen ordered his men to back up as well. "Maker grant your humble servant the strength to defeat these foes!" The lyrium sword began to glow as the power from it seeped into Meredith. She ran full bore at Cullen hitting the cursed sword of his shield. The clang of metal meeting the blade rand out through the courtyard. Cullen staggered back from the force of the blow and nearly fell to his knees.

Cullen!" Bethany tried to run to the man she loves, but Carver held her back. "Let go!"

"She'll kill you. Stay back!"

"I have to help him! Carver let go!" Leigh took her opening and stabbed at the woman from behind. The Knight Commander yelped and spun to attack Leigh. In a flash the rogue was gone and back next to her lover.

"Not nice when a mage fights back is it?"

"You will not defeat me!" A surge of power for the sword washed over the crowd and Leigh felt sick from it. Anders, Merrill and Bethany all grabbed their heads and whimpered. The corrupted lyrium called to them.

"Don't listen to it!" Leigh felt Pash push forward and put up a barrier around the other mages. Shocked gasps from the Templars and the companions who had never seen Leigh with her red cracked skin and glowing eyes. "You use the power of a demon Templar."

"Abomination! I knew there was blood magic here." Pash drew her flaming sword from her palm and stood ready. "I am one of the faithful, the Maker will protect me!"

"No he will not." With a angry cry Meredith ran forward and made a arching swipe only to be parried by Pash. "You are no match for all of us Meredith. Let go of that cursed sword. I can help heal you from it's corruption. It is not too late."

"I will not let you put your filthy hands on me mage."

"Do not be a fool, that sword will be your end." Pash's pleas fell on deaf ears and the Templar charged again. This time the blade met a staff instead of the flaming sword. Anders or more correctly Justice placed himself between the two women. He sneered at the Templar as he whipped the staff around and cracked her in the head.

"You will not hurt them Templar. I will not allow it." This time Meredith jumped back and landed on the stairs heading up to the Gallows.

"How in Andraste's great flaming ass did she do that?" Pash tilted her head toward Varric and sighed.

"The lyrium and the demon bound in it are fueling her strength. There is no hope of saving her now. She has made her choice."

"Why save her? She's a Templar."

"No one is beyond saving Bethany if they truly want it. Forgiveness is a divine gift, but it comes with a price."

"A price."

"The price is the willingness to admit you were wrong and try to apologize the those you have wronged. It is not something people like to do. Meredith thinks she is beyond redemption, beyond help and forgiveness."

"I hate to break this up, but she is doing something up there and I know it is not anything nice." Varric pointed up to where Meredith stood, she plunged the sword into the ground. A pulse of magic went out from the sword and hit the large metal and stone statues that adorned the courtyard. The sound of creaking metal overpowered the shouts of the group as the scattered. Justice kept himself close to Pash guarding her with his own body.

"I will not fail you again Mercy."

"You remember?" Her voice shook and tears sprung to her eyes.

"Yes, I will not let them hurt you again or Leigh. You both must carry on and stop all this."

"We don't want to do that without you and Anders. Please, I can't watch you die again."

"If we die, it will be protecting what we hold dear. Those children are what is important." He leaned forward and kissed her deeply. "Stay out of the fight." Before she could stop him Justice ran out into the fray. Pash receded back into Leigh's mind leaving her host in shock. She looked out from the shadows and saw the chaos that was ensuing. Carver and Aveline were working on one of the moving statues. While Fenris and Cullen fought the other one.

"Maker please help us through this." Leigh saw Anders fighting toe to toe with Meredith. Powered by Justice he was winning if only just barely. She hated hiding while her friends and the love of her life fought for dear life. "I can't stay here while they fight." "_Justice and Anders both told us to stay hidden." _"I will not let them fight this alone. This is what I was made for Pash you said so yourself." "_You have to protect your children. This fight is not yours." _"We'll just see about that." "_Leigh don't!" _"Sorry Pash, I will not stand by and watch this any longer."

OoO

"Red duck!" Varric sent a exploding bolt into the large construct over the warriors head. "These damned things just won't die."

"Varric watch out!" A smaller statue swung it's arm at the dwarf only to be met by a flaming long sword. Leigh growled and cut the metal beast in half. "Gather the others I am finishing this now."

"Hawke..." Her red eyes made Varric stop his protest. "Get Blondie out of there."

"That is the plan." She scanned the beleaguered crowd and found Cullen. With a quick sprint she was at his side her hand held out to freeze the statue he and Fenris had been chopping away at. "Cullen I need a shield."

"Leigh, get back and stay out of the fight. You shouldn't be out here."

"I need a bloody shield Cullen now. I am not hiding while the rest of you fight." Her expression told him there was no talking her out of it. He yelled to one of men to hand her their shield.

"I hope you know what you are doing. Meredith will not go down easy."

"Neither do I." Leigh had never used a shield before, but something in her made it feel like second nature. She charged into the battle, slamming the shield into the smaller statues before cutting them down with her sword. The sound of a arrow whizzing past her head made her turn. "Sebastian?" Out of the kicked up dust came Nathaniel Howe followed closely by Zevran. "What are they doing here?" Nathaniel aimed another arrow and struck the creature that had been working it's way to Leigh.

"Get Anders!" Leigh nodded and ran towards the two clashing foes. Meredith was tiring, but so was Anders. His swings were getting slower and ever block seemed to stagger him more. Leigh used the sword she held as a conduit for her magic and sent a bolt of lightning at the Templar.

"Anders get out of there!" He shook his head, but never took his eyes off of Meredith. "Love please..." Meredith gave one more mighty swing and snapped Anders' staff in half. Leigh screamed and threw out her sword hand trying to put a barrier up to protect him, but she was a second too late. The lyrium blade impaled him in the stomach. The howl from Leigh was deafening. The ground shook and Meredith looked up from her kill. An insane smile donned the Templar's face.

"Justice has been done, now it is your turn Champion." Leigh winced as Meredith pulled the sword from Anders' gut and let his body fall to the ground.

"I will rip you apart for that." Meredith laughed at her and waved her on. Leigh sent out a wave of her own magic and stripped the statues of the power that was fueling them. The ones still up fell to the ground in twisted heaps. The rest of the fighters stopped and stared at the woman as the circled each other.

"Mages will never rule over us Champion. I will not allow it."

"You won't be here to stop it. I will see to that." With a feral snarl the Knight Commander rushed at Leigh. Instinct took over and Leigh fought like a warrior who had been fighting for years. She bashed her shield into the older woman's face staggering her back.

"No, I will...not...be...defeated."

"You were defeated when you started this fight. Your pride brought us to this. Now you will see why mages are to be feared." Leigh dropped the shield and let the sword vanish. Her hands pulsed with magic. Fire and ice snaked around her body, while lightning arched out from her striking the walls and ground around Meredith. With a flick of her wrist Leigh sent a stonefist at the Templar shattering the woman's breast plate. She stumbled back and tried to get the breath back that was knocked out of her. A strong dispel came up from the Templar, but Leigh just shrugged it off. "Your pathetic attempts at draining my mana won't help you Templar. I was made to fight the likes of you."

"I will not let it end this way...you are a curse, a mistake. The Maker favors me not you."

"The Maker favors those that place their faith in him and treat all of his people with grace and compassion."

"You are an abomination you know nothing of the Maker! I am his chosen, I am the one who will be victorious." Another spell flew from Leigh's hands and slammed into Meredith. Inside her blood boiled wanting nothing more than to take the Templar and tear her apart with her own bare hands. Images of what she had done to the Templars that had hurt her father flashed in her minds eye. She shook her head to clear it knowing she would never go down that path again. She would not let herself be lost to that base passion again. Her eyes fell on the limp body of Anders and her heart felt like it was gone. She closed her eyes letting the tears slide down her cheeks.

"Then face me Meredith. Show me the might of the Maker and try to slay me." She heard the cries of her companions and siblings as Meredith brought her sword up one more time.

"Maker, I am your most faithful! Give me your strength! I your humble servant beg of you!" As if to answer the Templar the sword began to vibrate violently. In a flash of hellish light the sword shattered sending shards of lyrium flying. Leigh put up a flaming barrier to destroy as many as she could. The rest went into Meredith. The blood curdling scream from the woman chilled Leigh's blood. All she could do was watch the Templar turn to stone. She did not notice the other Templars moving around her or her sister and Merrill trying to heal Anders. Her whole body was numb.

"Hawke?" Aveline was afraid to even touch her friend for fear she would shatter or attack her. "Hawke, it's over. We need to leave."

"She doesn't seem to hear us. Is she hurt?"

"No I think she is in shock. We need to get her out of here before the Templars find their courage and try to take her in. Carver carry her out of here."

"Where? Without a ship we are stuck here."

"I can take care of that, the ship is read...y, holy Maker. Is he...?" Isabela ran up and the sight a Leigh, then of Anders made her lose her voice

"No, but is does not look good. Carver get her out of here now the rest of us will see to Anders." Carver swept his sister into his arms and ran for the dock. Her eyes still stared out into nothing as he ran. Asha and Ori met him at the gangplank and helped him get her aboard. Once he knew she was at least physically safe he went back to help the others. Cullen was barking orders at the Templars to find every one of the shards they could and burn them. Bethany and Merrill were still working on Anders and his color was at least coming back. Aveline was with her guards giving them orders.

"I will return as soon as I can. Brennon your in charge til I get back."

'Yes Captain, we will not let you down."

"I know you won't." Varric and Fenris both stood off to the side unable to help with Anders and as a deterrent for any of the Templars to try something. Carver stepped up next to the dwarf and the elf.

"She is safe on the ship. Ori gave her something to make her sleep."

"Good, now we got to get him on the ship too."

"Is he going to make it?"

"I don't know Junior, I just don't know. For her sake I hope so." Raven stood behind the mages working on Anders and she had to bit her lip to keep from crying. Nathaniel put his hand on her shoulder and gave her a somber smile.

"He'll make it, he is to ornery to die."

"He is a insufferable pain in my ass, but I can't imagine this world without him or Justice. I have lost people before, but..."

"He'll make it Ash, have faith." She nodded and continued to watch the two women weave him back together with magic.

OoO

Leigh woke to darkness. A warm body lay next to her and she reached out a hand toward it. The feeling of warm fur made her start to cry. The events that took place flooded back to her and she could not stop the tears. Someone must have heard her sobs because the door to her room opened. She saw Varric standing in the doorway.

"Where is he?"

"Hawke..."

"No, don't you tell me he's gone...don't you dare...!" She broke down then and fell into Varric's arms. She pitiful cries went through the whole ship. Varric smoothed her hair back and let her cry. Once she sobbing slowed he pushed her back a bit to look in his friend's eyes.

"He is still with us, but barely. Merrill, Bethany and Ori have done all they can. His wound is healed, but it is up to him now."

"What do you mean?"

"We thought he would wake when his body was healed, but he has yet to." Leigh tried to get up, but her limbs betrayed her. "You need to rest Leigh. I will have Orana bring you something to eat. We are out to sea so I hope you like fish."

"Are the others...?"

"All well and accounted for. Aveline and Donnic are here too. She refused to leave you til she knew you were alright."

"Always the older sister. You called me by my name, I've never heard you call me that before."

"Did I? Must have been a slip of the tongue." He went to leave the room, but her voice made him stop.

"I guess I have a older brother too."

"Yes you do and I will be damned if I let anyone hurt you Hawke. Get some rest, we have a long journey ahead of us."

"Where are we going?'

"Ferelden, the Warden Commander said she can hide you and Blondie there."

"I'm going home."

"Yes, and most of us are going with you at least for a time." Leigh nodded and closed her eyes again. She wanted sleep to take her so she did not have to think about losing Anders. She could feel Pash, but she was strangely silent. Waves of pain washed over her, both physical and emotional. She sought refuge in the Fade hoping when she woke Anders would be there with her. A final quick prayer to the Maker was all she did before drifting back off the sleep.

**I know this chapter is short, but I wanted to leave it on a cliffhanger. I still have a lot more of this story to tell so please stay with me. I promise all will be revealed in time. As always thank you for reading and thank you for the reviews as well. I know I don't have many of them, but those I do have kept me going with this story. You all have my heartfelt thanks.**

**Raven**


	36. Chapter 36

The long journey up the mountain was taking it's toll on Leigh and her companions. The path was steep and knee deep with snow. Leigh was very surprised they were able to get the carts up the incline, but the horses pulling them were burly and strong. When asked where they were being taken to Nathaniel and Raven were tight lipped. The journey took them a few days from landing at Denerim. It seemed the Templars here had already heard of what had happened in Kirkwall and they were looking for the group. They had to take the long hard route to wherever it was they were going.

"We should be there by tomorrow if we are lucky." Raven called back.

"I surely hope so. Dwarves were not made to ride horses." Varric growled and shifted himself weight in the saddle.

"You sound like Oghren my friend. He hates coming up here. I wasn't planning on having to bring anyone up here, but we don't have a choice. The Templars we ran into outside of Amaranthine made up our minds for us.

"You Wardens like your mysteries don't you?"

"I would tell you where we are going, but it is safer not to."

"Safer?"

"Just in case one of us gets caught. They won't be compelled to say were we are going. I know most of you would rather die than let them get Hawke, but torture can be a wonderful lip loosener." Varric gave the Warden Commander a wide eyed stare. "Sorry the assassin in me couldn't help it. My mind always goes to a dark place."

"I don't know whether to be disturbed or grateful." Raven gave a hearty laugh and urged her mount on ahead. "I swear I am going to seriously question Blondie about his choice of friends. I thought we were crazy." The rest of the journey was uneventful. Sometime before dawn the next morning the very tired and cold travelers arrived at their destination. Raven dismounted and barked orders to the guards that came to greet them. Nathaniel ran in the large keep and returned a few moments later with a group of men to unload the carts. Leigh jumped off her horse and went to make sure Anders was moved gently. A well armored cloaked man ran out of the keep and picked up Raven spinning her around.

"I was so worried about you!"

"I'm fine my love, I am glad you got my message. I was afraid it might have been intercepted."

"No, your lovely little network of spies and people who owe you favors made sure it got to us. Your other cargo as it were is here and settled in nicely." The cloaked man looked over her shoulder and winced as he saw them unloading Anders from the back of one of the carts. "What happened?"

"It is a long story I will tell you about later. Right now I want to go in and take a nice warm bath. I need to thaw."

"I can help you do that too My Lady."

"Oh you will be helping love, I have missed you so much."

"Our son has missed you as well. He is here with Wynne up in our room."

"I can't wait to see him." The large group unloaded the carts quickly and settled in the keep for the day. Leigh's group crowded into the room Anders was placed in and they started a grime vigil. It had been weeks since he was injured and still he had not come to. The longer it took the less chance for him to ever wake. His body was being sustained by magic for the time being, but even that could only go so far. He needed to wake soon or his body would waste away. Leigh had not left his side since she was finally able to get out of her own sick bed. She had not spoken more than a few words here and there to her friends, but they did not pry either. All of them knew, if she lost him it would break her. They all hoped it would not come to that.

OoO

Leigh stretched and yawned. She had not slept much in the last few days of travel, but she was afraid to close her eyes. Every time she did she saw that cursed sword impale the man she loves again and again. She felt her stomach rumble and she sighed. It was well after midnight and she knew other than the few guards that were patrolling the halls and the grounds, most of the rest of the keep was asleep. Another rumble told her she had to eat. She tapped Merrill on her shoulder and woke the sleeping elf.

"I am going down to the kitchen do you want anything?"

"No Hawke I am fine. I will keep and eye on him. If anything changes..."

"Thanks, I'll be back soon." She made her way to the kitchens and found she had to go through a makeshift Chantry. Her heart clutched for a moment and she had a strong compulsion to go up the the alter and pray. She had done everything else she could, maybe prayer would help. "You can't take him yet. Please, I can't do this alone."

"Your not alone my child." The voice made Leigh's heart jump into throat. She wheeled around and found Grand Cleric Elthina walking toward her. "The Maker is always with you."

"I'm...I did not know what he was planning...I didn't want all this death..."

"I know dear. If it had not been for his friends we all would be dead."

"But you are dead..." Elthina reached out and touched Leigh's hand. Her warm skin made Leigh gasp and fall to her knees. She covered her mouth and began rocking back and forth. The older woman knelt next to her and wrapped her arms around her.

"Shhh, child it is alright."

"How?"

"As I said the Wardens got all of us out of the Chantry before it..." Pain etched over the woman's face, but it was replaced quickly by an expression of warmth. "They put us all on a ship and sailed us here."

"I...I'm so sorry."

"I will miss my home, but the Maker has pointed me to a new path. You."

"Me?"

"I was given the scrolls that account the lives of Andraste's daughters. I was also told you are host to one of them." Leigh's eyes went wide.

"Do you believe the scrolls?"

"At first I did not, but faith is more feeling than fact. The more I read the more it made sense. The Warden Commander told me her account of finding the Urn of Sacred Ashes. The feeling of this being right became stronger. It is hard to believe some of the things instilled in you as a child are wrong."

"I know, believe me I know. I have seen things that defy all that I have thought was real."

"May I...will she speak with me?" Pash stirred and agreed to speak with the Cleric.

"She would like that. I just have to warn you it is a little unnerving to see. Please don't be afraid."

"I am ready." Leigh closed her eyes and relented control to Pash. The red cracks flashed over her skin making Elthina give a tiny gasp. When it all done Pash opened her eyes and turned her head toward the Cleric.

"Your Grace."

"Are you...I'm not sure how to address you."

"Leigh calls me Pash. That will do. I am sure you have questions. I will answer what I can."

"What was she like?"

"My mother? She was strong and kind. Wise beyond her years, her faith unshakable even at the end. She knew much more than my sister and I ever would."

"I would like to hear your account of what went wrong. Why everything is not as it should be." Pash stood and helped the Grand Cleric to her feet.

"We'd better get comfortable. It is a long story." The women went to a secluded corner of the keep and talked for hours. It gave Leigh's mind a much needed rest even if her body was not getting the same benefit. Ethlina listened intently, asking questions when they rose to her mind. Pash answered what she could or deemed safe to answer. There were things some mortals were just not ready to hear. As the hours passed the sun began to rise promising a new day.

OoO

"Ash?"

"In here Alistair." The king entered a small room off of his own and found his wife playing with their son. "He got so big while I was away."

"He missed you."

"You have no idea how much I missed both of you." Duncan Theirin played happily with his golem doll while sitting in his mother's lap. The boy had his father's features and his mother's dark blue eyes. Alistair smiled seeing his family happy and together again. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For leaving you alone against the nobles and Orlias. I know it could not have been easy."

"I survived, but Orlias is out for blood because of what happened at Chateau Haine. Funny thing is they think I had something to do with it."

"The Empress is just upset you didn't marry her."

"I didn't want her. There is only one woman for me Ash and that is you."

"I love you."

"And I you. So what do we do now?"

"We plan and close our borders. This war will swallow Thedas whole and I for one have had enough of war to last ten lifetimes."

"If we cut off trade Ash..."

"We have the dwarves and the elves to trade with. I know many ways around it and we have Isabela and her contacts."

"You do think of everything."

"I try my love. We will call the Landsmeet and get the nobles on board."

"I just hope your silver tongue can sway them or we might be living up here permanently and you know how much a hate the bloody cold."

"Trust me."

"Haven't I always."

OoO

Varric sat next to the fire in the common room. He was joined by a few of his old friends and some new ones. All were waiting for Anders to either come out of it or the worst case pass on. Bethany was curled up on Cullen's lap trying to sleep. Her worry for her sister etched all over her face.

"Sunshine you should go lay down."

"I tried. Every time I close my eyes I see..., let's just say I don't want to be alone." Cullen's hand smoothed out her hair trying to be a comfort. His gaze met Varric's and the dwarf just shook his head sadly.

"So no change then?"

"No, and it is not looking good. Every day that passes there is less of a chance he will come back."

"He has to. Leigh...she won't survive losing him."

"I know Sunshine. I saw it at the Gallows she just shut down. I …..." Leigh stood in the doorway having heard everything. Her arms were crossed over her chest and her eyes narrowed.

"Is that what you all think? That I will go to pieces if he doesn't wake up."

"Sister..." Leigh held up her hand to silence her younger sibling. Leigh opened her mouth, but shut it quickly. She turned on her heels and left the room hearing the others call after her. Her hand covered her mouth to stop the inevitable bout of morning sickness that was hitting her. She found an open balcony door and made it to the edge before her heaves overtook her. Once she knew her stomach was empty she slide down to the ground and wrapped her arms around her knees, bringing them up to her chest.

"Their right, I am a mess."

"Leelee?"

"Out here Carver." Her younger brother came and sat next to her. Leigh leaned up against his shoulder and shivered a bit.

"Your going to freeze your bum off out here. Bethany told me what happened. They are all worried about you."

"I know, but Maker I am not made of glass."

"If you had seen your face at the Gallows after Meredith died. You looked like you were...gone. I don't even think you realized I carried you to Isabela's ship."

"So that is how I got there."

"Yes, the last time I saw you like this was when Papa died. You were strong for us, but I saw you when you thought I was asleep. My strong, stubborn sister looked so broken and lost. It scared me, like it did at the Gallows. We are all here for you. You will never be alone Leigh." His hand took hers and gave it a warm squeeze. "Come on sister you need to go in and rest."

"I need to go check on him first Carver. I spent most of the might away."

"Why?"

"I was talking to the Grand Cleric."

"Ferelden's Grand Cleric?"

"No, funny thing that...it seems Justice warned the Warden Commander of what Anders was planning and she got everyone out of the Chantry. He did not murder all those people Carver, he just destroyed the building."

"Holy Maker, so...do you know what that means Leigh?"

"It means the man I love is not a monster...wait..."

"What?"

"It might be the reason he is not waking."

"His guilt?"

"Precisely." Carver pushed her forward and went with her to the room Anders was laying in. Wynne had come in to check on him and was sitting with Merrill. "Wynne?"

"You must be Hawke...Oh my, I remember you."

"Which time? The little cabin in the forest or Ostagar."

"Both dear. I see you found each other again."

"Yes, but it took a while. How is he?"

"He is fading...I am afraid...he is giving up." Leigh took a shaky breath and nodded. "If he does not wake by tonight his body will fail."

"Carver Take Merrill to get some food and rest. Wynne and I need to talk."

"Come one Merrill, they made a nice stew for lunch. Plus Varric has been wondering where you are."

"If your sure lethallan."

"I am, you need to rest." When she was sure the others were gone she shut the door and turned back to Wynne. "I need to be able to reach him in the Fade, in his mind or any which way I can. I need your help to do it."

"Not knowing where he is or if he is even still in his body it would be risky and might...no dear I am sorry."

"Might what?"

"Blood magic."

"Not going there."

"Smart girl. Hawke stay with him, brace yourself for the worst. I am truly sorry." Wynne left without another word and Leigh slide herself on the the bed next to Anders.

"You can't leave me like this. Please, please come back to me." Leigh curled up next to his still form and rested her head on his chest. The slow sound of his heart told her she was running out of time. "Dammit Leo, wake up!" She lay like this for a while and no change in him. "_Pash please you have to help me." "I can't, he has to want to live. I can't not choose that for him." "Then help me find him so I can get through to him he has things to live for." "You can do this yourself. You are a Somniari." "Just be my anchor then, and wish me luck." _Leigh steeled herself and put her hands on either side of his face. Her forehead touching his, she dug deep into her mana and used powers she swore to her father she would never use. Her will reached out to Anders' and tracked it so she could find him quickly in his mind. Since his spirit and body were weak she had to take great care to be gentle.

She found him sitting in the middle of a group of dead men. One of which she recognized as the man Rolan. His hands were covered in blood and he was shaking. She moved slowly so not to startle him and noticed Justice was chained to the ground. Another shadow crossed over her view, but she could not make out who it was. It stalked around Anders and growled.

"Every Templar deserves this fate, you can not escape it. You are a coward for hiding here."

"Then I am a coward at least you won't be set free on the world."

"You and Justice have tried so hard to keep me in check, but you failed. Once you murdered those people in the Chantry you became mine." Leigh could see Justice straining against his bonds, but they were too tight.

"Do not listen to him Anders. Release me and I can help you fight him."

"It's over Justice as long as I keep him trapped here he can't hurt any one else." The demon chuckled darkly and grabbed Anders by the hair.

"You think that your death will hold me and take me back to the Fade? You die and I take over your body. I wonder if that pretty little woman of yours will notice your gone." Anders lunged at the demon, but even here he was weakening.

"You will not touch her!"

"I bet she will enjoy my company much more than yours." Leigh could not listen anymore and took the opportunity to strike. A well placed stone fist hit the demon square in the shoulder sending him reeling away from Anders.

"You know it is rude to take about a lady behind her back Vengeance." Anders head snapped up and saw her standing against one of the trees in the vision. Her eyes glowing and her expression cold as she stared down the demon.

"Leigh?"

"You got to traipse around my head, now it is my turn to traipse through yours."

"If you kill me pretty thing you kill them too."

"You have no idea what I am, do you demon?"

"Your are an annoyance nothing more." Leigh stretched out her hand and wrapped the shadow in red tendrils of magic. With her other hand she melted the bindings on Justice.

"It is time for you to go demon. Your not welcome here."

"I am a part of him now, he is a murderer."

"No he isn't. Grand Cleric Elthina is alive and well as are all the other people that were inside that Chantry thanks to Justice." Anders stared wide eyed at his lover hoping she was telling the truth. Her gaze met his and he saw she was. A wave of relief spread over him. "You have no claim here not be gone or I will make you." Just to get he point across she tightened her magic bindings around the demon. "Last chance."

"I would see him dead before I give up to you." Leigh cast a fire spell and hurled it at the writhing shadow. Her other hand reached back for Anders sending a pulse of power through him. Out of the corner of her eyes she saw the color return to Anders' face, but he still look so weak.

"You can not have him demon." Vengeance snarled and thrashed against his bindings. The fire she had thrown was eating away at the demon. Anders screamed and fell to the ground writhing as did Justice. Leigh cursed and extinguished the fire. "Let them go now."

"Or what? I have all the control fool. I die, they die. There is no getting rid of me."

"_Pas_h?" "_Anders and Justice are too weak to survive Vengeance's death." "Any way to strengthen them?" "The only way I know is...no Leigh it is too dangerous to try." "Tell me." _Leigh listened as Pash explained her plan. She knew the risk, but she had to try.

"Why would you want a half dead mage when you could join your strength with me?" Anders and Justice both snapped their heads up to stare at Leigh.

"NO! Leigh don't."

"Silence mage, what do you propose mortal?" Vengeance practically salivated at the prospect of having her power. Leigh hoped his greed got the better of him.

"I let you in and you leave them alone. Together we can free the mages and bring about a blood storm the likes this world has never seen before." Vengeance smiled and stepped closer to her.

"You are a much better match for me. Your power would be a great asset, but they will try to stop us." The demon pointed to the two men on the ground.

"They will not interfere, but you will have to break your bond with them before you can join with me." The demon was so enthralled by the prospect of joining his power with Leigh's that he broke the bond with Anders and Justice hastily. He did not notice Leigh ready a spell til it was too late. With the bond broken she did not hold back. The spell she let loose shook the ground in Anders' vision. The bodies that had been laying at her feet incinerated in a instance. Vengeance let out a pitiful howl before disappearing completely. "Idiot."

"You...tricked him?"

"Demons are stupid love. Their lust for power overrides all other thought in their tiny little brains." Leigh held out her hands to both Anders and Justice helping them from the ground. "Are you both alright?"

"I am fine Hawke, but...Anders is fading."

"I know, that is why I am here. You need to wake up love. Your body is giving out."

"Maybe..."

"If you say it is for the best I will smack you. You are not a murderer. All the people in the Chantry are alive. I have spoken to Elthina myself."

"But what I tried to do...I was willing to destroy all those lives. Why would you want to be with some one who would do that?" Leigh sighed and waved her hand. The scene around them changed to show a encampment and mangled bodies strewn around it.

"I did this. I showed them no mercy even as they begged for it. Some of these men where innocent. It was their leader I wanted to hurt, but I could not tell the difference through the hate and the pain. I know how you feel, how you felt when you decided to do this. This war needs leaders and I can't do this alone. I don't know what it is like to be a Circle mage. I can't help those so damaged by the abuses, but you can. This is our war, please don't make me fight it alone. Please don't make me have to raise our children alone." Her expression broke the last bit of resolve he had to let himself slip away. He cupped her cheek and leaned his head against hers.

"I would be an utter fool to leave you Leigh."

"Then come back to me. Wake up!" Her voice shook the vision and Anders felt it fall away. He could feel Justice in his mind settling back where he belonged. Then the dull ache hit him. His body felt stiff and weak. The light from the candles hurt when he opened his eyes, but the sight in front of him was the most beautiful sight he had ever seen. Liquid silver eyes stared back at him full of love and relief. "Welcome back to the land of the living." He opened his mouth to speak, but his throat was too dry and his lips cracked at the effort. "Hush love, rest." Leigh stood up and felt a wave of dizziness, but she kept her footing long enough to grab a glass of water. "Take small sips. Your body has been deprived of this for over a week." After a few sips he found his voice.

"How long?" It came out raspy, but clear enough for her to hear him.

"Almost three weeks, two of which we were at sea."

"Where?"

"Ferelden, up in the mountains on the Coastlands. Soldier's Peak I think I heard them call it." He nodded and took a few more sips. Leigh helped him sit up a little better so he could take a few bites of bread. "The King is here and an old friend of yours from the Circle." He raised and eyebrow at her in question while still chewing his food. "Wynne."

"Who else is here?"

"Everyone, well except Sebastian." A small twinge of sadness passed over her face as she said his name. Anders moved his hand to cover hers and gave it the best squeeze he could.

"I am sorry love."

"It was his choice. He chose to walk away because I wouldn't kill you." Leigh's eyes went wide with horror at the thought. "If I had listened to him...Maker."

"He thought I was guilty."

"I know, but..."

"I'm still here."

"Yes you are and so help me I intent to make it stay that way. You need to rest Leo and so do I. I haven't slept much in the past three weeks."

"Leigh." His voice came out stern, but lacked the edge it should have. He knew full well she spent those three weeks watching over him. "You should not have..." The sound of a small joyous giggle halted his words. The door to their room had been left open just a crack, but it was enough for a stout little blonde toddler to rush in.

"Duncan get back here!" The boy ran and hide behind the other side of the bed before his mother could get in the door. "Hawke I am so...Anders, thank the Maker your awake!" Leigh knew the woman's voice, but the armor threw her. The armor she wore was that of the Warden Commander and Leigh was pretty sure the woman in front of her was the Queen of Ferelden.

"Your Majesty?" Another tiny giggle sounded from behind Leigh and the small boy peered out from over the bed.

"Mommy Queen." Ashlyn sighed and picked up her little boy.

"Yes Duncan mommy is the Queen. Forgive me he is very active and his manners are none existent." Anders smiled and shook his head.

"If he is like you Ash then Thedas better watch out."

"Funny, at least your injury did not hurt your bad sense of humor Anders," Leigh cocked her head to the side and was thoroughly confused. Anders gave a weak laugh that turned into a cough.

"I'd have thought you would have figured it out by now love. Raven and Queen Ashlyn are one and the same."

"That...would explain a lot."

"Sorry for the deception, but most people think the Hero of Ferelden is dead. It was one of the only ways I could see to stay with Alistair."

"Why stay a Warden then? I mean I know that you can never truly stop being a Warden, but why keep fighting?"

"It is in my blood. My family has always defended Ferelden. I also wasn't very keen on having Orlesians tromping around with no rules to go by."

"She came out of retirement so to speak when all the Orlesian Wardens were killed at Vigil's Keep." Duncan started pulling at some of the feathers on Anders' robe that was hanging on the chair.

"Feathers!"

"Duncan no."

"It's alright Ash,"

"He is into everything." Leigh smiled softly and patted her stomach.

"I guess I have that to look forward to."

"But yours will be doubled."

"Good thing I had practice running after my siblings."

"You will have plenty of help with them I assure you. Up here you both are safe. Other than the my Wardens no one knows about his place. It was lost for hundreds of years before we found it."

"Please tell me that creepy blood mage is not here anymore." Ashlyn gave Anders a sad smile.

"Avernus is still alive Anders."

"Bloody hell."

"Who's Avernus?"

"A two hundred year old Warden blood mage." Leigh's jaw fell and she lost her words. "He was the one who sent that package you intercepted your first year in Kirkwall."

"How did you...nevermind how has he lived this long?"

"Blood magic and stubbornness. He is a bitter old man, but I have a great deal of respect for him after what he has done for me."

"Ash what did he do?"

"He found a way for me to have a child. With Alistair and I both Wardens it was...I can't dwell on it now I have my little miracle."

"Mommy I'm hungry."

"My very hungry miracle. I swear he got the Warden appetite. I will leave you both to rest and will make sure you are not disturbed for a while. When you are both up to it we have much to plan and discuss."

"Ash...I can never thank you enough.."

"Your very welcome. I told you when I recruited you Anders I never leave a man behind. Now rest. We will speak later." Anders let his body slip back down into the bed and Leigh followed suit. Her head resting in the crook of his neck as their fingers intertwined.

"How are you feeling?"

"Sore, but nothing a bit of rest and strong magic can't fix. Leigh...I should have trusted you, but I wanted your hands clean of it."

"Yes you should have, but I understand. You wanted to protect me."

"Yes, like you have always protected me."

"If I remember you have saved me many times too my love. We are in this together and have been since you walked back into my life. Everything of me is yours."

"What happened to not being a clingy lover?" Leigh's head snapped up and she glared at her lover.

"I lied."

"I was joking love. I told you I never want to lose you."

"And I told you that you never would. I love you with all my heart Anders."

"Mo Aman Cara."

"I will never get tired of hearing that." She snuggled back into the crook of his neck and let her eyes close. She slept deeply letting her body relax for the first time in what seemed like months. They were safe for the time being and she had Anders back from the brink of death. For a brief second before her mind opened to the Fade she thought of Sebastian. She prayed he was safe, but she also hoped he never found them. If it came down to it she would have to kill him and it would break her heart to do so. Only time will tell if she would ever see him again. Leigh felt Anders' arms wrapped around her and she let go of her thoughts. She was safe, she was happy. That was all that mattered.

**These next few chapters are going to jump around a bit so please bare with me since I am now in uncharted territory. Thanks again to my reviewers and those who have put me on their favorites and watch lists. I would not have made it this far without your support and kind words. I hope you all continue to enjoy this. I still have a ways to go.**

**Raven **


	37. Chapter 37

Anders paced in the hall trying not to think about what was going to happen in less than an hour. It wasn't that he wasn't ready for it quite the contrary he wanted this. It was the waiting that was killing him. His male friends were all gathered out in the hall with him waiting just like he was. All of them dressed in fine clothes for the occasion.

"Andraste's knicker weasels how long does it take for a woman to get ready?" Nathaniel just shook his head and gave a heavy sigh.

"As long as they want my friend. Are you afraid?"

"Petrified. I just want to get over with." Varric sauntered up to the mage and laughed.

"What are you afraid of Blondie, she already said yes to marrying you? All this is just for show."

"I guess it is just the last part of me that was the old Anders fighting to stay free. I swore I would never be tied down, never give my heart to anyone. And here I am waiting to bind my life with Leigh's. It's just...I'm afraid I will wake up and this will have all been a dream." Anders closed his eyes and sighed. His fingers pinched the bridge of his nose trying to avert the dull ache that was starting in his head. A sudden sharp pinch on his arm made him yelp. "Ow, what was that for?"

"To prove to you that your not dreaming. Look do you love her?"

"With all my heart."

"Then stop worrying. Enjoy the day. Your lucky you know."

"Why?"

"Well with you both sharing a Name Day and now having that same day as your wedding anniversary, you will never get in trouble for forgetting either." Anders could not help but chuckle. Varric always had a way of looking of the bright side.

"Very true. I just want to see her. The girls whisked her away from me last night and I haven't laid eyes on her since. Who knows what ideas they are putting in her head."

"Be afraid Anders, be very afraid."

"Your not helping Nate."

"Never said I was."

OoO

Leigh sat as still as she could while Isabela worked on her makeup. Merrill wove silk ribbons in her hair since they did not have flowers. Ori and Bethany were waiting to put the finishing touches on her dress. Aveline stood guard at the door making sure Anders did not peek.

"You sure you want to do this kitten?"

"Never been more sure about anything in my life."

"Just checking. At least your not showing too much or we would have had to wrap you in bed sheets." Leigh placed her hand on the small bump that was forming along her belly and smiled.

"Would not have mattered to me, as long as I am getting married to Anders. I would go naked if needs be." The pirate laughed and continued to paint her friend's face.

"Hawke we heard you call Anders, Leo last night before we took you away. Why did you call him that?" Leigh smiled at Merrill, she had not told any of them Anders' real name.

"That's his name."

"Really?"

"Yes Merrill really. Remember that apostate I told you about when you were helping me with my magic?"

"Yes? You said he was taken back to the Circle."

"He was. Then he escaped again, joined the Wardens, joined with Justice and moved to Kirkwall."

"Wait, what?"

"Anders was the man I helped all those years ago. We just didn't recognize each other."

"Hawke that's...completely romantic."

"What are you two going on about?"

"Hawke and Anders met each other long before we knew them."

"Really?" Leigh brought her hand up and sent small sparks out.

"Who do think taught him that electricity trick?" Isabela's eyes went wide and a slow lusty grin came to her face.

"Now your making me jealous kitten. If you two ever want to spice it up and have a threesome I am always game. Just ask Ashlyn and Alistair, they enjoyed themselves." Everyone's eyes went to Ashlyn and she had a pink blush creeping up her neck.

"Izzy you promised..."

"Sorry kitten, but you know I don't keep secrets well."

"Maker help me."

"Aren't you and Fenris together?"

"He and I enjoy each others company, but I am not one to be tied down. Neither is he I think."

"Just don't hurt him okay?"

"Not unless he wants me to?" Leigh groaned and closed her eyes. "Almost done Hawke. There all finished. He won't be able to keep his hands off you."

"He just have to keep them off for a little while. I'm not sure the Grand Cleric will take it well if he ravages me right in front of her."

"It would be a good show for me though."

"Isabela!"

"Relax kitten I was just joking. Go look at yourself in the looking glass and tell me what you think." Leigh smiled at the reflection of herself. She thought it would be hard for the pirate to out do herself from the last time she had helped Leigh, but she did. "Don't start crying please."

"I won't, thank you Isabela. Alright Ori and Bethany I am all yours."

"We will make this quick. Don't worry sister you will be his wife soon enough. Alright lets do the wedding list. The dress is borrowed, you have mother's necklace which is blue, hmmm, now we need something old and something new."

"I hate to even ask this, this late in the day, but do you two have rings?" Leigh shook her head sadly.

"No we don't, other than the enchanted ones we always wear."

"I think I can help with that." Ashlyn left the room and returned a short time later with a small box in hand. "These rings belonged to two Wardens that served here hundreds of years ago. I'd like to see them get used instead of collecting dust." Leigh could feel the magic coming off the rings and ran her hand over them. "They are enchanted this one is called Fade and the other is Void."

"Fade feels like it is meant for helping with healing."

"It also has a thin band of refined lyrium in it."

"Justice will love that. Void is made for destruction magic."

"That fits you sister."

'Thanks Beth."

"It's true, you are scary with your magic, but in a good way." All the women laughed and started the finishing touches to Leigh and her dress. It would not be long now before she walked down the isle to join her life with Anders'. "Now for the something new. Anyone got any ideas?"

"The ribbons are new."

"I guess that will have to do. Are you ready?"

"Absolutely."

OoO

"You pace any more Sparkle Fingers and you will wear a hole in the floor."

"Where are they?"

"They'll be there Anders calm down."

"You can't tell me you weren't nervous when you married Shyira, Nate?"

"I was, but I also had an entire Dalish clan giving me death looks. The only one here doing that to you is Fenris and I'm pretty sure that is just for show."

"No he means it."

"I do not, I just like watching mages squirm uncomfortably." Anders rolled his eyes at the ex slave. "I want Hawke happy and if you make her such then I will put aside my dislike of your magic."

"Fenris...I think that is the nicest thing I have ever heard you say to me."

"Don't get use to it. You hurt her and I swear I will rip your heart out."

'Now there is the Fenris I have come to know." Bethany entered the hall and giggled ay how nervous Anders looked.

"Carver, Varric and Fenris if you three will follow me."

"Wait, where are you three going?"

"Carver is giving the bride away, but Hawke wanted Broody and I involved to so Fenris will walk her down part of the isle, then me and finally Junior. Nathaniel and Oghren are here to make sure you don't run away. See you inside Blondie."

"Breathe Anders."

"Maker save me."

"Oh before I forget here is the ring your giving my sister. She has yours."

'Where did you get these?"

"Queen Ashlyn gave them to Leigh."

"Your welcome Anders." He turned to see his Commander dressed in a fine gown with Alistair on her arm. He too was dressed in noble clothing instead of armor. "You do clean up nice though." Anders blushed a bit and stared at his reflection in the window. He did look nicer than he had in a long time. "Are you ready for this?"

"Yes, Thank you both for this."

"You are welcome. I never thought I would see this day."

"Neither did I. Ash if you hadn't..."

"No bad thoughts today. It is your Name Day and your wedding day. Enjoy it."

"Is that an order Commander?" He raised and eyebrow and smirked.

"Yes. Now go and take your place so we can get this party started." Anders hugged Ashlyn then went to take his place near the alter. Nathaniel and Oghren stood beside him both grinning like fools. The doors opened and the guests started to take their seats. A soft hand landed on his arm and he saw the Grand Cleric smiling at him. Once he was healed and got some of his strength back Anders went and begged for her forgiveness.

"Your Grace."

"Nervous?"

"A little."

"You are meant to be together. There is nothing to be nervous about my boy."

"I never thought this would be possible. I was always told that mages were never allowed to have this."

"We will have to work to change that."

"Thank you for this and...everything. I do not deserve..." The older woman held up her hand to silence him.

"You are a honorable man."

"Honorable men do not try to blow up innocent people."

"To start change sometimes violence is necessary. I wish it wasn't so, but it is. After talking with Leigh's spirit I understand now. It was never meant to be this way. I want to help set it right even if it is only a little bit. Joining your lives will be a small step forward." Nathaniel cleared his throat and nodded toward the door to the chapel.

"The girls are here. It's time."

"Breathe young man. I don't need you passing out before you say your vows."

"Thank you, Your Grace." Orana played her lute to start the ceremony. Aveline lead the women down the aisle. Carver followed close behind as did Varric. Carver stopped at the end of the rows of pews while Varric stopped half way down and waited. Elthina had taken her place at the alter. The guests were mostly Wardens, servants, and Hawke's friends. Some of the members of the Kirkwall Chantry were also in attendance. Orana glanced over at door waiting for the signal from Fenris to start playing the wedding march. The music changed and Anders breath caught in his throat. His eyes lifted up from the ground and he felt his knees jerk. The sight of Leigh walking toward him made him weak. The dress she had on was white, but it was mostly peasant style. Her smile brightened up the room and he had to stop himself from running to her. Fenris made it to the half way point and handed her off to Varric. It seemed like it took an eternity for them to reach Carver.

"You look beautiful Leigh."

"Thanks Carver."

"Poor magey looks like he is going to pass out."

"And he didn't even have to drink a magebane potion."

"He got off easy." Leigh just smiled. Carver stopped just shy of the alter. Elthina raised her hands and bid every one sit.

"Who gives this young woman to this man to be bound in marriage?" Carver handed Leigh off to Anders.

"I do Your Grace."

"Then we shall begin." Elthina raised her hands up and began the ceremony. "The Maker made us to seek out the comfort of others, whether in friendship or in love. For those who can find that one person who complements them completely, they are surely blessed. We join here today to to see two such souls take the vows that will bind them together in the sight of the Maker. We will hear their vows to each other before the words of the Chant are spoken to complete this ceremony." Alistair leaned over and whispered into his wife's ear.

"This does not sound like the ceremony we had."

"It's not, Elthina has been working with Anders and Leigh to make this their own. We did not get to make our own vows love. We had a royal wedding."

"I like this one better."

"So do I." Anders' voice made Ashlyn turn her attention back to the alter though her fingers entwined with her husband.

"If you had told me I would be standing here fifteen years ago I would have told you that you were crazy. I was raised to find love as taboo. Then a chance meeting on one of my many escape attempts changed everything. I was saved by this fiery, courageous young woman. She could have chosen to let the men chasing me take me away, but she saved my sorry hide and has kept saving me even when we were apart. Her love kept me sane when I was imprisoned even though she never knew it. I found in Leigh my heart, my other half, and I will spend the rest of my days showing her just how much her love and support means to me. She is my Mo Aman Cara, my soulmate. I know the Maker made her for me and put her back in my life when I needed her the most. I love you Leigh with all my heart and soul and nothing will take me from you again. I am blessed beyond measure to have you as my wife and partner in this life." Leigh felt tears form in her eyes while she listened to him speak. This was real, she was marrying the man she wanted since she was sixteen. The only person to except her for who and what she was long before anyone else knew about her power.

"Leigh it is your turn to speak your vows to Leo." Leigh nodded and took a deep breath. She felt more than heard someone talking to her. She knew the voice was her mother's. "_We are so proud of you Leigh. We are here watching." _Her eyes wandered around the room and she could see a faint shimmer in the distant corner behind her friends. It took her a second to find her voice to say her vows.

"I remember the morning I came to visit you after losing Karl. I think that was the day I started to fall for you. I saw in you a caring, selfless man who was trying to change the world. Despite the dangers you healed the sick and took care of the poor in Darktown. You always told me I was the bright light in Kirkwall and I always thought you were. Little did I know you were the same man I fell in love with when I was younger. My wayward apostate who despite not knowing how to survive out in the world was not about to be locked up away from it. You found a way to be free. I plan to make sure that you stay that way for the rest of your life. My mother always called me a protector, a defender of my family, my friends, but sometimes the protector needs to find solace in their lives. You have been mine. I love you more than I can say for all you have done. Whether I stand with you against the Templars, bandits or darkspawn I will always be yours. My Leo, my Anders, you are my safe harbor. I am honored to become your wife and to call you husband."

"If there is anyone here who feels these to should not be joined in marriage please speak now or forever hold your peace." Leigh had a fleeting feeling Sebastian was about to jump out from behind one of the statues in the chapel. When silence met the Grand Cleric's words she breathed a sigh of relief. "Then we shall proceed. Leo please repeat after me, With the blessings the Maker has given unto me I bind my life to yours." Anders took Leigh's hand and repeated the words while putting the ring on her finger. "Leigh repeat after me please. With the blessings the Maker has given to me, I bind my life to yours." Leigh placed her ring on Anders' finger with confident hands. "In the sight of the Maker and our gathered guests I now pronounce you husband and wife." Before Elthina could say anything else Anders closed the small distance between himself and Leigh. He kissed his new bride deeply. All the anxiety he had felt before the wedding was gone. He could hear the chuckles from his friends, but he did not care. He had what he always wanted right there in his arms. Once they finally broke apart both turn to face their friends. "May the Maker bless and strengthen this union."

OoO

Anders kicked the door to their room open and carried Leigh across the threshold. He gently set her down on the bed and went back to close the door. He made sure the door was locked and the fire was set for the night before returning to their bed. He heard her talking and wondered who could be here now of all times. It was their wedding night and that meant it was suppose to just the two of them and their bed. He stormed into the room that held their bed and stopped in his tracks. There on the bed was Leigh with a orange ball of fluff on her lap. She looked up and smiled at him while her hands scratched behind the cat's ears.

"You got me a cat?"

"No love he just sort of wandered in here." Anders went and sat on the bed next to Leigh and the cat jumped from her lap to his. The sandstone colored eyes stared up into amber ones and Anders let out a small cry. "Anders?"

"How did you get here?" The cat just meowed and headbutted his hands.

"Love?"

"Leigh I would like you to meet Ser Pounce a Lot."

"This is Ser Pounce a Lot? He is so...cute." The tabby turned his head and gave a quick meow before returning his attention to Anders.

"I never thought I would see him again. Who could have brought him here?"

"One of the Wardens maybe. We did make land in Ameranthine. Isn't that were you said you had to leave him when the Wardens made you give him up?"

"Yes, but why haven't I seen him til now?" A soft knock came at the door and Leigh got up to answer it.

"Anders someone is here to see you." Leigh came back into the room followed by a man Anders had not seen in years.

'Finn?"

"Sorry to interrupt your wedding night, but I wanted to make sure Pounce got back to you. Ah and there he is."

'How did you get him? I left him with Nate's sister."

"Pounce did not get along with her son so when I sprung from the Circle the Warden Commander asked if I would take care of him for her til you returned or forever. Which ever came first and now your here so he's all yours."

"Thanks. How long have you been out of the Circle?"

"Four years now. I can safely say I am not fond of the outside world."

"How can you say that?" Anders voice was a mix of his own and Justice. Leigh could see the start of the blue glow starting in his eyes. Her hand squeezed his hoping to keep him from losing control.

"I'm not like you or Jowan. I liked being in the Circle. I felt safe there."

"Safe? Safe, it was not safe Finn. You know what they did to Ori, to Miranda."

"I...I..." The blue glow was starting to show and Leigh stood up blocking Finn's view of Anders.

"Love, please calm down. This is not helping." He looked at her and sighed. Justice fell back and Anders shook his head. Once she was sure he was in control Leigh turned back to Finn hoping he had not seen anything. "You were one of the lucky ones that the Templars left alone."

"Yes, I wasn't worth their time. I always had my nose in a book or they had bigger concerns than little old me. Anders was their main target most of the time. He was trying to get them to leave Ori and Mira alone."

"Ori I have met. Who is Miranda?"

"Miranda Amell, she well...no it is not my place to say."

"Mira had a thing for me Leigh to put a fine point on it. I think she thought she loved me, but we were...each others comfort nothing more." Leigh just nodded, not wanting to think of him with someone else not tonight of all nights. "Love it was before I met you and it stopped after I was returned to the Circle. Please..."

"Finn, is my cousin still there?"

"Cousin?"

"My mother was an Amell and Miranda is my second cousin I think."

"Yes, she is still there. I am returning there in a few days. Knight Captain Cullen wants to accompany me to talk to Ser Greagoir about the Circle." Anders shot a look at his wife and she smiled.

"Cullen is going to try to see it they can dissolve the Circle so there is no violence. He told me the Knight Commander there is much more reasonable than Meredith."

"No he's not. That man will never let mages free, not after what happened there. He is the one who sentenced me to a year in solitary, he is not a kind man Leigh."

"Maker, Anders you are still not that dense are you?" Anders glared at Finn and took a step toward the man. "He could have made you Tranquil the first time you escaped and every time after that. The only reason your not is his daughter kept you safe."

"Who?"

"Ser Greagoir has a daughter that is a mage. She is the reason you were never killed or made Tranquil after all your escapes. She tried to protect all of us, but she couldn't."

"Who Finn?"

"Ori."

"Ori is an elf."

"She is one of the rare half elves that looks elvish."

"Why didn't she ever tell me this?"

"She knew how you felt about the Templars and she did not want to lose you as a friend I guess."

"How could her own father let Addler and Rolen hurt her like they did?"

"If he let it slip he was her father she would have been taken to another Circle." Anders growled and hit the wall with his fist. "She told me once that if they were hurting her, then they weren't hurting anyone else."

"Is that the reason Greagoir came to find me for that one escape?"

"I think so."

"That stupid, brave little girl. I..."

"You were like a brother to her Anders. She loves you."

"I know, when you go back I want to go with you. I want to see if I can help dissolve the Circle."

"Your not going without me love."

"Leigh it is not safe for you to go. I want you to stay here."

"It is not safe for you to go either. You are barely healed and I am not going to let you go alone." Finn stood up and backed away from the two toward the door.

"I think I am going to let you two fight this out without me here. I'm leaving in two days so you have plenty of time to discus this. I'll...just take Pounce with me for the night." With that Finn picked up the cat and ran from the room.

'You scared him away."

"Very funny Leigh. You not coming!"

"We will see about that."

'Maker you are so stubborn. You have no idea what it is like there. I will not lose you or our children to the blighted Templars."

"You won't. I don't plan on letting them get that close." Anders rolled his eyes and stormed away from her to the other room. She could hear him pacing and mumbling to himself. Leigh let out a sigh and flopped on the bed backwards. This was not how she wanted to spend her wedding night. "_Go out there and get him." "Why so we can argue some more? I don't have the strength." "Then don't fight." "It's like we are back in Kirkwall all over again." "It is not that Leigh. He is afraid of you seeing what that place does to him. He does not want that to touch you." "Maker I feel like and ass now." "Go get him."_

Anders paced trying to stop the bile from coming up his throat. The last place he ever wanted Leigh to go to was Kinloch Hold. He did not want them to touch her. He also did not want her to see the fear in his eyes when he walked into the place he fought so hard to escape. He did not hear her sneak up behind him. Her arms wrapped around his waist and her head rested on his back. All his anger melted away from her touch. He twisted in her arms so they were facing each other. His chin rested on his head and she sighed.

"This is not how I wanted to spend tonight Leigh. I hate fighting with you."

"And I hate fighting with you. I just don't want you to have to face that place alone. Your not alone anymore."

"I know, I just don't want you to think less of me."

"Why would I?"

"That place..."

"Hush love, no more bad thoughts. Tonight is ours. Forget everything else. Come with me." Leigh took his hands and led him back to their bed. She had lain out a gift on his side of the bed.

"What's this?"

"It is our Name Day you know. This is your gift?"

"I...Leigh I don't have anything for you." Her hands patted her belly and she smiled.

"You already gave me what I wanted love. Go on open it." He unwrapped the fabric around the gift and chuckled.

"This was your father's staff."

"Meredith broke the one I gave you so I know you need a replacement."

"Shouldn't you or Beth use it?"

"I don't need it and Beth has the one I gave her. My father would have liked to seen it used by a fellow healer."

"The naked woman on the top isn't bad either."

"Your impossible, but I love you for it." Anders placed the staff up against the wall and left the room. "Where are you going?"

"To lock the door. I don't want to be interrupted at all tonight." He made sure the door was nice a tightly locked before heading back into the bedroom. "I still don't want you to go to Kinloch Hold Leigh." He felt something soft hit his head and he looked over to the bed.

'Anders just shut up and take your clothes off." He realized she had thrown her smallclothes at him and he gave her a rakish grin.

"My, my bossy aren't we? What if I say no?"

"I will have to use my magic and enthrall you." It had been a long time since she had seen him strip that fast. She giggled as he crawled on to the bed with her.

"You enthralled me the first day I met you and everyday since." His lips met hers softly and his fingers tangled in her hair. Leigh let out a soft moan and pressed herself closer. The covers were the only barrier between them, but he was going to take his time. It had been too long since they were like this, alone and full of passion. "This is a first."

"What?"

"Making love to a married woman."

"Hmm, less talk more kissing." He threw back his head and laughed giving her an opening to nibble on his neck. Her fingers danced down his chest sending small sparks off as they went. She smiled against his neck when he started to moan and squirm under her touches. She pushed his shoulder back so that he was laying on his back. Her hands wandered lower down his stomach to his hips. "It has been a while hasn't it?"

'For this or the electricity trick?"

"Both, but more the sparks."

"Why didn't you ever do this to me when we lived together?"

"It's silly." He brushed the hair out of her eyes and gave her a loving smile. "I wanted to be something I had only done with...well you, but...oh Maker my brain is not working." Anders just shook his head and pulled the covers over himself so he could feel her skin against his. Her finger ran over his scar from where Meredith had run him through. A shiver ran down her spine on how close she came to losing him.

"Now you know how I felt when you battled the Arishok. We have matching scars now."

"Let's make a deal never to jump in front of large swords again."

"Sounds good to me Dove." He pulled her up against him and sank into her warmth. They kept their bodies side by side as they moved as one. Leigh was in pure ecstasy under his touch. It did not take long to feel her release. Anders quickly followed. "I love you."

"I love you too. I'm still going with you." He gave a dark chuckle and buried his head in her neck.

"I know better than to argue with you. I never win."

"It is not about winning love. I just don't want you doing this alone anymore. The last time I let you out of my sight you blew up the bloody Chantry."

"At least no one got hurt."

"Thanks to Justice and the Wardens."

"I know, I should have trusted you. I just thought I was protecting you. That it would be on my head and my head only."

"You wanted to..." His hands cupped her face and his rested head against hers.

"I did, but now I see that was selfish of me. I am so sorry Leigh. I won't leave you like that again."

"Until your Calling."

"We have many years before that. We need to think about today not the future right now. I hate to even think this, but I might try talking to Avernus. He has lived for over two hundred years maybe he can help me and the others to live longer lives before the Taint takes us."

"I thought you hated the man?"

"I don't like blood mages true, but he is a brilliant mage. It is worth it to spend extra years with you and these little ones."

"I think we would all like that very much." She let out a small yawn and she nuzzled his neck trying to get comfortable.

"Sleep love, we will start planning our trip in the morning."

'You not going to try yo leave me behind are you."

"No, I need to face that place and I know I can't do it without you there to help me."

"They can't hurt you anymore. Your safe with me."

"I have never been safer. Good night Dove."

"Good night Leo."

OoO

"Thank you for coming with us Ori."

"Your very welcome Leigh. I doubt Carver would have let you go in the Circle alone anyway. How is Anders holding up?"

"He has been very quiet the closer we get. I just hope they will listen to us."

"I'm sure Ser Greagoir will listen."

"I'm sure he will with you there." Ori blushed and wrung her hands in front of her while they walked.

"You know?"

"Blame Finn. He told us."

"Maker Anders knows?"

"He understands."

"I always thought he would hate me."

"I don't think he could ever hate you Ori. I owe you much for protecting him all those years."

"He was the first person I met when I was put out with the other mages. He was kind to me and made sure the others did not make my life miserable. He is my friend."

"That sounds like something he would do. It is one of the reasons I love him so much." The sight of the Tower rose over the horizon and she saw Anders stop walking. His face was blank, but his eyes looked haunted. Leigh stood behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist. She could feel him shaking under her embrace.

"Love?"

"I don't know if I can do this."

"Then don't. I will go with them to talk to the Knight Commander here. Cullen will not let anything happen to me."

"I...alright, I will go with you as far as the main door."

"Carver will stay outside with you. Wynne, Ori, Finn and I will go in with Cullen."

"Just...be careful. I can't lose you to that place."

"You won't. Come now it is nearly nightfall." The ferryman was still at his post when they arrived at the lake. It was a long ride over to the Tower and Anders spent most of it staring off into space. Leigh could not imagine how he felt. She never had a place that terrified her in the way Kinloch terrified him. All she could do was hold his hand for support.

"You know I swam across this lake on my sixth escape attempt."

"That wasn't the one you met me on was it?"

"No that was my fifth. I was trying to get back to you on the sixth one, but I was so tired from my swim I did not get very far before they caught me."

"You were coming back for me?"

"That was my plan. I thought if I found you again I would be safe. We could live as we were meant to, free and happy."

"We are doing that now."

"I know, but the punishment I was given for that escape...no one should ever endure that."

"What did they do?"

"I was locked in solitary for a year. The Templars who came to feed me never once said a word. I was alone with only my thoughts to keep me company." Leigh frowned and her eyes narrowed at the tower in front of them. Now she understood why he was afraid. This place nearly drove him mad just to teach him a lesson. It made her want to tear the place down just on that principle alone.

"Never again love. I won't ever let them hurt you again."

"The worse they can do to me is take you."

"Well since I am not using my name I should be fine. Cullen told me to say I am Bethany who is court mage to the King. They have no right to me."

"That eases my mind. I'm sorry I am not stronger." She leaned over and kissed his cheek.

"You are strong or that would have broken you years ago." The ferry docked under the tower and they made their way to the main doors. Pash recoiled as they got closer. She could feel the despair and evil that was there. "Pash does not like this place at all."

"She can feel it?"

"Yes, despair and evil, but it is an echo to her." Wynne nodded as she stepped beside the two.

"It is what is left over from Uldred. He tore the Veil here and brought demons into the Tower. Many people died here in that short time. If it had not been for Raven the Circle would have been lost. They were waiting to hear if they could enact the Right of Annulment."

"They were waiting?"

"To hear from the Chantry here is Ferelden. They can't act unless the Grand Cleric calls for it."

"I guess Meredith forgot that." A dark shadow passed over Anders' face. Leigh took his hand and brought it up to her lips.

"She thought Elthina was dead love."

"True."

"Carver can you wait out here with Anders for me?"

"Sure, I not not really keen going back into that place anyway. Ori how long do you think you will be?"

"Not sure my love. It might be a bit."

"Tell the old man I say hello."

"I will, wish us luck."

"Good luck." Ori stood on her toes to give her husband a kiss. Anders clung on to Leigh and did not want to let go. He finally let her go and watched her walk through the door. He barely felt Carver's hand on his shoulder. The sight of the woman he loves walking into his nightmare made him numb. Leigh cast one last look back at him and gave him a reassuring smile before disappearing through the large doors. "She'll be fine."

"I never wanted to see her here."

"She is here to set mages free Anders and for you."

"It does not make it any easier."

"The joke will be on them if they try to hold her here. She'll tear the place down and they won't be able to stop her. You have to trust her."

"I do trust her. It's them I don't trust." Carver sighed and sat down to wait. He was not fond of being Anders' babysitter, but he knew it was important to Leigh, so he did not complain. He just hoped they came back soon or he would be forced to knock Anders unconscious. He did not think his sister would be happy with that.


	38. Chapter 38

When the door closed behind her, Leigh had a moment that she felt like she was trapped. Kinloch Hold was much larger than she expected. The main doors were large enough that a Qunari could walk through and still have plenty of room for clearance. The foyer was cold, both in feel and in look. The sound of raised voices shook her out of the trapped feeling. She raised and eyebrow at Cullen and he shrugged. They rounded the corner and found a older woman screaming at the Templars in front of her. A younger woman was trying to calm her down but to no avail.

"I want to see my son! I know you have him here, let me see him!"

"We told you what the Knight Commander said madam, your son is not here any longer. He's gone."

"You lie! You lowland dregs took him from me, ripped him out of my arms, I want him back now!" The one Templar took a menacing step forward only to be pushed back by Cullen.

"Cullen? Maker why are you back here?"

"Not important right now, what is going on?"

"This woman wants to see her son, but he ain't here anymore." Cullen turned back to the two women and tried to defuse the situation.

"Madam what is your son's name I might be able to find him or at least point you in the right direction."

"Your one of them, thief, liar!" Before he could react the older woman drew a dagger and slashed at Cullen. The only thing that saved him from having a belly wound was his armor. The other Templars drew their blades ready to fight if necessary. Leigh step in between the Templars and the woman. Her hands were up to show she meant no harm.

"He is trying to help you good woman. Please don't do this."

"They took my boy, my sweet little boy. Now they won't give him back, won't let me see him. I have to find him, I have to."

"I understand, but attacking them won't help."

"Are you one of them?"

"No, I am a mage." Leigh held out her hand a let it glow with mage light. The woman's face lit up in a smile and she lowered her dagger. "How long ago did they take your son?"

"He was twelve." Leigh looked at the younger woman with her and gave her a questioning look.

"Are you her daughter?"

"No, I am her niece. You must forgive her, she is desperate and just wants to see her son before my uncle dies."

"Is he ill?"

"My uncle was the one who called for the Templars. For years he never talked bout my cousin. I did not know about him til a few years ago. Now my uncle wants nothing more than to ask his son for forgiveness before he dies. My aunt needs to know her son is safe and alive. For the past twenty years all she has ever thought about is her son."

"Twenty years?"

"There are no Circles where we are from. When he was taken, they took him here."

"Where are you from?"

"The north, the Anderfels."

"They have no Circles there?"

"No, we do not view mages like the rest of Thedas. Most who are born are sent to the Grey Wardens or sent away. Our homeland has paid dearly for sins of mages. The Blights have left large parts of land barren, void of life."

"I understand. Where is your uncle?"

"The innkeeper down by the loch would not let us stay there with him, but gave us a place in the stables. My other cousin is with him."

"What is wrong with him?" The older woman looked up at Leigh and showed the tears tracking down her face.

"His lungs are failing. He finds it harder and harder to breath."

"Has he seen a healer?"

"He is a proud man, magic is...unnerving to him. He thinks he does not deserve to have it save him after sending his son away." Leigh shook her head bitterly before turning to Cullen.

"Go ahead the three of you, I am going to go see what I can do to help these people."

"Leigh are you sure?"

"I am sure, if you need me send Wynne or Ori to come get me. I will be at the stables near the inn."

"Be careful. Beth will never forgive me if something happens to you."

"I will. I have every faith in you. You and Ori can do this."

"I hope so. It is not going to be easy."

"Nothing ever worth doing is."

OoO

Carver leaned against the railing and closed his eyes. If he watched Anders pace anymore he would give himself whiplash. The sound of the large heavy doors opening made him scramble to his feet. Three cloaked women walked out, only one of them he knew. Leigh had her hood down as she came out of the door the other two women had theirs pulled close around them.

"Leigh?"

"Where is Anders?"

"He is down by the boat pacing. He was making me dizzy so I came up here for some fresh air. Who are they?"

"People who meed our help. Is the ferry still here?"

"Yeah, we heading back already?"

"Just to the inn. Ori and Wynne are staying here to help Cullen. It is up to you if you want to stay here or go with us."

"I'll stay here. I am not keen on leaving my wife here even with Cullen watching over her."

"She is still waiting in the foyer."

"Sister,...Anders is...he is worried about you."

"I know, that is why I am going with him over there."

"I'll see you soon."

"Watch over them."

"I will." Leigh led the women back to the ferry where Anders was pacing and talking to himself. He heard the footfalls and turned to see who was coming up on him. His face melted into a look of relief seeing Leigh coming toward him. She turned to the women and asked them to get on the ferry so she could talk to him.

"Who are they?"

"This woman's husband is very ill and needs healing. Your the best healer I know so we are going to help."

"Where is he?"

"At the stables near the inn."

"Maker's breathe it is not fit for a sick man to be out in the cold."

"The inn keeper did not want him in the inn for fear he might have something catching."

"I understand that, but give the man some decency. It is coming up on winter."

"This is why we are helping them."

"Let's go, the faster I get away from this bloody place the better." He pulled his cloak hood up to brave the chilling wind coming off the lake. He remembered now why he disliked Ferelden winters. It was too damned cold. He wrapped his arms around Leigh trying to keep her warm. He noticed the two women were not as effected by the cold as he was. He figured they were from a cold climate place. "What are your husband's symptoms?"

"He can't breathe fully most of the time. His lungs are failing."

"How long has he been like this?"

"A few months, we traveled her from the Anderfels to find our son. He fell ill and wanted to make amends before he left this world."

"Make amends?"

"He sent our son away after it was found he had magic." Anders tried to keep his voice from betraying the vast amount of anger that was welling up in him. "He thought...he was wrong and wants our son's forgiveness before he dies. He wants peace."

"Did you find your son?"

"No...the Templars said he is no longer here, but will not tell me anymore than that. I never should have let them take my sweet boy."

"How long ago was he taken from you?"

"Over twenty years ago. I tried..., but they were too strong, too many." Anders put his hand over the grieving woman's and patted it gently.

"You could not have stopped them my dear lady, they would have killed you."

"You are a mage?"

"Yes, I am a healer."

"My husband use to think that all who have magic are cursed, but to be a healer...it is not a curse is it?"

"It is a gift, but there are somethings magic can not cure. I do not want to give you false hope. I will do what I can for your husband." The woman nodded, biting back tears. It did not take long for them to get to the other side of the lake. Once on shore they could hear the man's coughs and wheezes even from the dock. Anders took off running when he heard a younger woman cry for help. He stopped dead when a young blonde woman drew a dagger on him for entering the stable. His eyes went wide looking at the woman, with her gold hair and amber eyes.

"Cilina let him through, he is a healer." The young blonde woman put down the blade she had drawn on Anders and moved next to her mother. Leigh knelt next to him and started pulling things out of his pack he might need. The old man was skin and bones. His skin gray for lack of proper air. The wet wheezing sound coming from him made Anders cringe.

"I need him sitting up please." The younger women gently and slowly pulled the ill man up for Anders to get a better look and to ease his breathing. Even as sick as he was the man fought to keep the mage from touching him.

"Let...me...alone."

"If you plan on finding your son to make amends you need to stop fighting me and let me help you." Leigh heard the venom in her normally soft spoken husband's voice. His eyes had a dead look to them. She wanted to ask him what was wrong beside the obvious that the man had done the very same thing his father had done, but she bit her lip to keep the question at bay.

"Too late...son...is …...dead."

"Did the Templars tell you that?"

"Y...yes." His wife flinched and glared at her husband.

"He is not dead...I know he is still alive."

"Arden,..."

"No!"

'Stop it both of you. Let the healer help you Da, then we can try to find my brother. Please." Anders looked back at Leigh from under his cloak. He fingers twitched to start healing, but he was torn about helping this man. It was like hearing his father all over again. After a few more seconds the man nodded. Anders removed his cloak so he could move better and began to work. He was so set on his task he did not see the older woman staring at him, searching his face.

"Love I need the elfroot and some menthol."

"For a potion or poultice."

"Poultice. It will help with his breathing once I get some of the damage cleared away."

"What kind of mage was your son?"

"Pardon?"

"Was he a healer or another type of mage?"

"We don't know, his...he could use fire."

"Most of us can. It normally is the first magic we do."

"Da said he set the barn on fire."

"Poo...poor boy...sneezed...and..." Another large coughing fit hit the older man and Anders struggled to ease the spasms in his lungs.

"Leigh I want you out of here. You don't need to get sick."

"I'm fine love."

"Your pregnant and don't need to be around this. Please love, for me."

"Where am I to go?"

"Anywhere but here. Go to the inn I will be along when I am done." Leigh opened her mouth then shut it. Something had him upset, but it was best not to ask in front of strangers. She took both their packs and headed for the inn. "Drink this." He thrust potions at the women and went back to work. He let his eyes close so he did not have to see the man's face looking up at him, pitiful and withered. "_Anders?" "Not now Justice, I am not in the mood." "But he's..." "I don't bloody care if he is the Maker, I will never forgive what he did. He can die without my forgiveness." "What of your mother?" "I...just don't know, I have to concentrate, please just drop it for now." "As you wish."_

OoO

Leigh woke to warm arms wrapping around her. She stretched a bit and turned so she could face her husband. His hair was down and still wet from bathing. Her fingers began to twist some of the hair and she heard him sigh.

"Are you alright love?"

"Better now that I am here with you. I'm just tired Leigh. I used a lot of myself to heal that man."

"Will he live?"

"For now."

"What's wrong? I can hear in your voice something is bothering you."

'It's nothing love, let's just sleep. Tomorrow we will go back to the Tower talk to Greagior and leave this place. I want to get back to the Peak." Leigh sat up and eyed him. She knew he was holding something back and she would be damned if he shut her out again.

"Anders please talk to me_. _We promised, no more secrets, no more lies." He groaned and sat up next to her before getting out of bed. He went to his pack and took out the old pillow he had. "What's that?"

"It is a pillow, hand embroidered by my mother. It was the only thing they let me keep when they took me away. She wanted me to at least have something to remember home by."

"Seeing this family looking for their son must...be very hard for you."

"Not really. It has been years since I was taken and I really don't remember much of my life before the Circle. I am not missing much."

"Bullshit!"

"Leigh..."

"I saw the look in your eyes love. I know this is hurting you, please don't...shut down on me again." Anders rubbed his face with both hands and tried to think of a way to tell her.

"It does hurt, but I have you now. I don't need anything or anyone else."

"But to be able to have your family again...I would give anything to have my parents back."

"Your parents cared about you Leigh, mine...they let those monsters take me!" His hands clenched into tight white knuckled fists before punching the door to their room.

"Anders?"

"I...Maker why are they here? Why now?" He sank to his knees and cradled his now bleeding hand. A swift knock on the door broke Leigh's attention.

"You'd better not be destroying that room." She opened the door and saw the innkeeper staring at her with narrow eyes.

"I'm sorry my husband saw a rat in here and we were trying to kill it. It would be a awful shame for news to get out you have rats in your inn."

"Ah...I...sorry about that madam. I can move you to another room if you'd like. We don't want bad rumors starting do we?"

"No we don't. This room is fine, but I will ask that you take some food out to the people in your stables. Broth for the ill man and whatever was for dinner to the women if you would please."

"Yes, I...I will leave you to yourselves then." When she was sure he was gone Leigh knelt down next to Anders. She took his head between her hands and pulled his face up to look at her.

"Love?"

"I...I just need some air. I'm going to go for a walk, go back to sleep love." He got up quickly and tore out of the room. Leigh just sat on the floor dumbfounded. She had seen him upset many times before, but normally it was powered by Justice. This time it was all Anders and his own anger. After a few minutes Leigh got up and got herself dressed and went out to the stables.

OoO

"_Anders?"_

"Leave it alone Justice. I am never forgiving that man. You have no idea what he said to me or did after I set the barn on fire. He will just have to die without my forgiveness."

"_I know what he did, your memories are mine remember?"_

"Then you know he beat me within a inch of my life and called for the Templars. He called me a curse, an evil, vile thing. He said I was dead to him so better I stay that way."

"_What of your mother? She did not want you gone, she fought to keep you. Doesn't she deserve to know you are alive?"_

"I...she has me sister. She doesn't need me."

"_You know that is not true."_

"They replaced me! They moved on and now so am I. I don't need them Justice. I have Leigh,that is all I need, all I want." The spirit stayed silent after that. He could feel his friend's pain, but did not know what to say to ease it. Anders wandered the shore line trying to calm himself. "I swear my children will never feel unwanted. I will never let anyone take them from me."

OoO

Leigh sat next to the older woman and her daughter. The older man was sleeping and the niece was down at the inn fetching water and more blankets. The mother and daughter were talking in a language Leigh did not understand. She wished Anders was here to help her translate since this was his native tongue, but he had run off to Maker knows where. A warm hand touched her arm and she saw the older woman smiling at her.

"We can not thank you or the healer enough for your help."

"It was our pleasure. Tell me more about your son."

"He was such a good boy. So full of life and such a charmer. He made friends very easily with both people and animals. Cats were his favorite."

"Must be a mage thing. My husband loves cats too."

"You are married?"

"Yes."

"I thought..."

"Normally we are not allowed, but here is Ferelden things are changing."

"He said you have a wee one on the way."

"Two actually, I am having twins." Leigh patted her ever growing bulge fondly and smiled. "He never thought he would ever have a family, ever be free."

"You are very lucky."

"I know, my father was a mage and raised in the Circle. He got away, gave my mother a life with my siblings and I. It was a hard life, but I would not change it for anything."

"You have lived free your entire life?"

"I was lucky, my sister was taken from us for a while, but I got her back and now we are here."

"You are lucky to have your family. It took me years to...forgive my husband for what he did. If it had not been for the gift that is my daughter I would have left the man to his misery. I hated him for taking away my son. Part of me still does, but I don't need to burden you with all this. You have helped us and shone kindness I was not expecting from a lowlander."

"Did the Templars tell you why they think your son is gone?"

"They said...he was killed by darkspawn."

"He fought in the battle of Denerim then?"

"No, they said he was conscripted by the Grey Wardens and died fighting darkspawn over seven years ago."

"The Wardens here in Ferelden?" Leigh's stomach flipped a bit, but she kept her expression calm.

"That is what I was told. I know...I know he is not dead."

"My husband was in the Circle here he might know your son. What is his name?"

"Leo. My little Leo."

"Holy Maker, you...you gave him a pillow when they took him.

"Yes, I made it for him when he was just a tiny thing. Wait...do you know my son?"

"I have met him yes and as far as I know he still lives."

"Do you know where he is, please, I...have to see him." The older woman clung to Leigh's arm tears flowing from her eyes.

"I...I don't know where he is, but I might no someone who does." A strangled wheezing sound came from behind the women and both scrambled to the sicken man's side. His lungs were filling with fluid again. Leigh used the knowledge she had learned from Anders years ago to try to ease the man's breathing, but she wasn't skilled enough. She could barely hold off the liquid from taking over his lungs. "I need you to go to the Tower and get a mage named Wynne and another named Ori. Ask for Ser Cullen or Ser Carver, tell them Hawke sent you."

"What of the other healer?"

"He went out for a walk and I am not sure where he is. I can hold this off til you get them here, but you have to hurry. I am no healer and my mana will not last forever." The two younger women ran from the stable and headed for the ferry. "_Pash, I need you to help me." "He is dying Leigh, let him go." "This is Anders' father and the bastard need to apologize to him for what he did to him, if nothing else." "He is suffering." "So is Anders." "I will do what I can, but Mercy's touch will not help him. It is his time."_ Power flooded Leigh's veins giving her the strength to fend off this man's death . "Don't you dare die on me. I have a bone to pick with you." The man's eyes opened and stared into hers. He tried to speak, but he could not put enough air behind it. "Don't try to speak, just listen. What you did to your son was heinous. Do you know what they did to him? Do you care that they put in a cell for a year because he tried to run away? He has suffered. If you think I will let you die without being able to at least say you are sorry, you have another thing coming." Leigh poured more of her mana into the man trying desperately to keep him alive and she was losing the battle. She needed a miracle.

OoO

It seemed like hours since she had sent the two young women to the Tower and Leigh was running out of time. Her arms felt numb and her body shook. She had poured all her energy and then some just to keep the man breathing. Pash screamed at her to stop before she hurt herself or worse, but Leigh would not fail another father. She did not have the skill back then to save her father, she'd be damned if she let the father of the man she loves die.

"_Stop it now Leigh, your hurting yourself!" "I have to hold on a little bit longer. They'll be here soon, Maker please let them be here soon." "If you don't stop Leigh I will take over." "Pash..." "I know what you are trying to do Leigh, but you've done all you can for him. It is his time. Please, don't make me have to stop you."_ The last of her will was gone, as was her mana. She knew if she pushed herself farther she could hurt herself or worse her unborn children. Leigh choked back a sob as she let her magic fade on her hands. "I'm sorry, I'm so very sorry. I can't..." Her limbs felt heavy and her sight blurred before she passed out. She did not see Anders rush into the stable followed closely by Ori and Wynne. Nor did she feel Carver's touch on her arm.

"How long was she using her magic?"

"Over an hour." Anders shot a worried look at Leigh seeing her so still. Wynne clucked her tongue and shook her head.

"No mage can sustain their magic that long without lyrium."

"She is not like the rest of us Wynne. She's a Somniari."

"Maker's mercy. How has she stayed hidden all this time?"

"Wynne I need your help. His lungs are filling up to fast...I...I can't stop it." Anders started pulsing healing magic into his dying father, but it was not working. He could feel the man's life ebbing away. She floated her hands over the man and shook her head.

"There is nothing we can do." Tears formed in his eyes and he looked at his father's face, his face. He looked so much like him, even the amber eyes where inherited from his father. All the years of hating the man, wanting nothing more to see him suffer as he had suffered broke away. All there was left was a very scared little boy watching his father breath his last breaths.

"No...he can't..." Anders shook the man to get him to open his eyes. They were already milking over as death fast approached. "Da, open your eyes. Please, open your eyes!"

"L...Leo?"

"I'm here Da, I'm here. Just rest, you... need to save your strength."

"For...give...me..."

"I do, I forgive you Da." Anders saw a smile grace his father's face, before he breathed his last breath. Warm hands touched his face and he saw his mother kneeling next to him. He face a mixture of joy and great sadness.

"Could it be true?" Anders could only nod and hang his head. "I knew they were lying. I knew you were alive." She crushed him in a warm embrace and cried. "My son, my son..."

"Why did he want my forgiveness?"

"So he could meet the Maker without his guilt. He knew I never forgave him for having you taken away and in time he...he knew he made a mistake. I'm so sorry, I should have took you and hid the moment he started talking about sending you away."

"They would have found me eventually and you would have been hurt for trying to hide me."

"I'm your Mum, it is my job to protect you. I made a mess of it didn't I?"

"No, you didn't. I never blamed you." Arden's eyes fell on Leigh and she smiled.

"Your wife is awake." Anders turned and saw her sitting up against the side of the stable. He stood up and went to her. Leigh had tears tracking down her face when she looked up at him.

"I tried..."

"I know love, please don't cry."

"Did...?"

"I forgave him. I don't want this hate to seep into our lives anymore. I...need to heal and the only way I can is by letting my past go."

"I hope not all your past."

"No love your stuck with me and now it seems you will be stuck with my family too."

"There is no one I would rather be stuck with more than you love." Wynne had covered over Anders' father and was comforting his sister. The girl stared at the covered form of her father and sobbed. Leigh tilted her head at Anders and he went to talk to her.

"Mum said your my brother."

"It seems I am."

"I know you hated him, but still you tried to save him, why?"

"I hated what he did. I thought...he was so angry when my magic started to manifest itself."

"He regretted it, even if he did not voice it til he found out he was dying. Mum threatened many times to take me away and leave him alone. She missed you so much. I grew up hearing stories about how much you were the light in her life."

"You seem to be the same."

"I try."

"I am so very sorry I could not save him. No matter how I felt about him, he was still my father and I do have some good memories about him."

"You did what you could, he was ready to go and he got what he wanted most, your forgiveness. He can go to the Maker without the guilt that has been slowly eating away at him all these years." Ciline stepped closer to her brother and opened her arms to embrace him. They talked for a while longer before Anders returned to Leigh's side. She was still sitting on the straw floor, but she was smiling despite her exhaustion.

"Our family keeps growing."

"That it does, they want to come with us once we are done here. My Mum sold their farm so they have nowhere to go back to in the Anderfels."

"I think that is a wonderful idea. You can get to know your sister better and your mother seems to not want to let you out of her sight."

"No she doesn't, does she." He looked back at this family and sighed. "I should have told you I knew when you asked me, but I did not want you to try and fix this."

"I tried to anyway."

"I can't say I am happy you drained yourself to exhaustion, but I am happy you tried to help them."

"I did not have to power to save my father. I know you have a lot of anger toward yours, but losing him without him knowing it was you, without your forgiveness would be worse."

"Pash tell you that?"

"No, she told me to let him go. She knew it was his time, I was just stubborn and did not want it to end like that."

"I don't know which one of you is wiser, her or you? She has the wisdom of ages, but you my love know me better than anyone else I have ever known. I love you for that."

"You know me better than anyone else so we are even. What will they do about a funeral?"

"I am going to freeze his body so we can have Elthina give him a proper send off. Carver said Ori and Cullen were almost done at the Tower before this happened."

"Almost done?"

"I'm not sure what it means, but hopefully it is good news. I need to get you back to our room so you can rest."

"Carver can take me back, you should stay here and talk to your family without all the others here."

"If your sure?"

"I'm sure." Leigh let him pull her off the ground and hand her to Carver. She was not surprised when she woke later that day that Anders was not in the room with her. She knew he needed to be with his family and reconnect. Their family was indeed growing and with every new addition she say Anders heal a little bit more. It warmed her heart to see some of his old self shine though. Even with a war looming over their heads she saw hope, at least for them. It was a small victory, but a victory none the less.

OoO

Cullen rushed into the inn looking for Leigh later the next evening. He had a very large smile on his face when he found her in her room. Anders was asleep having spent the entire night talking to his sister and mother, but bolted awake when the door burst open.

"Ferelden's Circle is no more!"

"They are giving up without a fight?"

"Yes, Greagoir agreed with Ori and I about it. Mages can come here to study under senior mages, but they will not be forced to stay. The Templars will be reassigned to the royal army as blood mage hunters if need be, but nothing more."

"I...I can't believe it."

"Believe it Anders, mages in Ferelden are free."

"Cullen I don't know how to thank you for this."

"Don't thank me, thank Ori. She has a silver tongue when it comes to her father."

"Maker bless that woman, she really did it"

"The Queen is closing Ferelden's borders since she knows this will anger the Divine, but she hoping other Circles will follow suit around Thedas and force a change."

"She is closing the borders, but that will hurt the land won't it?"

"She has ways around it, at least that is what she told me."

'How does she plan to guard the borders?"

"The Dalish have that covered and as for the sea I think your friend Isabela has that covered. War is coming, but they will have a Void of a time getting very far." Anders picked up Leigh and spun her.

"This is really happening, mages will be free."

"Yes love we will be, but this is far from over."

"I know, but this is worth celebrating. The first step forward to a brighter future, for us, for our families."

"Who are you and what have you done with my moody, angry Anders?"

"Are you complaining?"

"Maker, no. I like this side of you. I have missed it."

"Well get use to seeing more if it. We are doing it love, we are changing the world."


	39. Chapter 39

Seven months had past since that fateful night in Kirkwall. Seven months of fighting and gathering allies. Sebastian Vael was beginning to wish he had died with the rest of the faithful in the Chantry. It was far better than dodging assassins or feeling the cold lonely pit in his stomach. Ghostly gray eyes haunted his dreams and he hated waking. Even after everything he still loved her, wished she was still with him and not with Anders, but she had chosen the mage over him. Now he was alone, surrounded by people who he did not truly trust. The fight for his throne was at a stalemate. Neither side giving ground and no clear way of winning. Sebastian was traveling with a group who were the most loyal, if he could call them that. They wanted him on the throne so they could further their own cause, but he had no other choice. He needed to retake Starkhaven so he could finally track Anders down and kill him for what he had done.

"We should be there soon my Prince."

"Good, are you sure that Davin is willing to add his men to ours?"

"I have it in good faith his is. We will tread carefully though. Have you heard anything from Ferelden?"

"Nothing is getting through, they shut their borders up tight. The Divine and the Empress have declared war on them, but can not get near the country. Mages are flocking there is droves as the Circles fall. Ferelden was the only one to fall without a fight."

"How did they manage that?"

"Queen Ashlyn is not a woman to trifle with."

"So she runs Ferelden, not that bastard they put on the throne?" Sebastian grimaced and opened his mouth to chide the man for his careless words, but he was cut of by the sound of screaming. Arrows flew in the air hitting his travel party. His own horse was winged by one of the arrows and it threw him to the ground. He felt his head hit something hard and his visioned blurred. The sounds of battle died down after a few minutes and he saw a shadow standing over him.

"Your cousin send his regards." Sebastian saw the flash of steel in his murky vision, but could do nothing to stop it. He closed his eyes and waited for death to claim him. The sound of metal hitting metal made him open his eyes. He could see someone standing over him holding a shield. The assassin who had been standing over him just mere seconds before was now on the ground twitching.

"Kali behind you!" The warrior standing over him shifted and slammed her shield into her assailant's face. Her sword sliced right into the man's neck dropping him dead at her feet.

"Bloody murderers."

"I think that was all of them."

"It looks like he is the only survivor." Sebastian tried to sit up, but his head spun. Strong hands steadied him to a sitting position and a soft voice sounded in his ears. "Easy, you have a nasty bump on your head. We need to get you somewhere safe to heal it."

"What of the others?" He looked around and saw bodies and blood everywhere. He winced and said a soft prayer for their souls.

"I am sorry to say it looks like they are all dead. My home is not far from here, you will be safe there." Sebastian nodded and let the woman help him to his feet. The other person with her stayed out of his line of sight. He had a fleeting thought that they could be with the assassins til he saw the flaming sword on her breast plate.

"One of the horses survived, should I bring it?"

"That would be a good idea Da." Sebastian did not remember much after that. He slipped into a deep sleep once they got to their little hut in the woods.

"Why would they attack those people?" The Templar took off her armor leaving her in just a tunic and leather pants.

"I found parchment on one of the assassins, they were trying to kill Sebastian Vael."

"Prince Vael, but why?"

"His cousin does not want to give up power my dear."

"So he is..."

"I think so, yes. Which means we need to make sure he is kept safe."

"Of course, but how when it just you and I?"

'We need to take him to the Revered Mother."

"Da you know I can't take you anywhere near the Chantry. The Templars will kill any mage on sight. I was lucky enough to get you out of the Circle here when the fire happened."

"It is chance we will have to take Kali. His cousin is driving Starkhaven into the ground. This war is tearing everything apart."

"I know, we will talk to it about him when he wakes."

"I healed his cracked skull, but he needs to rest. I am going out to tend to the horse you will need it so you can take him."

"I will make dinner and watch over him."

"If he wakes give a yell. I want to make sure he has no other injuries."

"I will Da." Kali stared at the man that was now in her bed. He looked like he was having a bad dream since his face was twisted in a grimace. She sighed and went over to sit next to him. Dinner would have to wait.

OoO

"_Maker, where am I?" _

"_Hello Sebastian." The sight in front of him was one he longed to see. She was just as beautiful as he remembered._

"_Hawke?"_

"_Yes it's me." He could only stare at her. Longing and rage built up in him and he closed the distance between them. Leigh stood her ground. "How are you?"_

"_You have no right to ask me that!"_

"_Still seeking revenge I see."_

"_You let a murderer live!"_

"_You asked me to kill the man I love what did you expect me to do?"_

"_I thought you had honor." Leigh began to laugh. "You think that is funny?"_

"_No, I think you held me to a very high expectation. I am a rogue, as are you. Do you really think what we do is honorable?"_

"_If used for the right reason, yes." She shook her head and sat down on a rock that appeared out of thin air. Sebastian backed away with horror on his face. "Demon."_

"_If I were a demon you would be dead by now."_

"_Then how are you here like this? Your not a mage."_

"_I asked Feynriel to help me. He is a dreamer and can access dreams of other people. I wanted to come see you myself, but I can't."_

"_Why can't you?"_

"_Other than the fact you will probably kill me on sight, I am on bed rest."_

"_Are you ill?" She saw the concern on his face and knew he still cared for her despite what had happened._

"_Not ill."_

"_Then why?"_

"_I'm...I'm pregnant and it has been a tough time of it."_

"_Your having that demon's child?"_

"_He is not a demon and yes I am having his children."_

"_Children?"_

"_Twins. That is another reason I am here. I am begging you to not come after Anders."_

"_He killed innocent people, people I called family. He needs to die for that crime. They didn't even find anything left of their bodies to do rights on."_

"_That's because none of them died."_

"_Liar! We both saw the Chantry explode, where would the Grand Cleric and the others be if not in the Chantry?"_

"_The Wardens got them out before it was destroyed. Elthina is still alive." _

"_Your lying."_

"_I have never lied to you Sebastian. I was always truthful to you about everything you asked me."_

"_Your trying to protect him. Your precious Anders."_

"_I am, but I am also telling the truth. Don't be blinded by your hate for him that you can't hear the truth."_

"_I will not listen to you anymore. If I find him I will kill him and if you stand in the way...I will kill you too."_

"_And leave our children parentless? Will you be just like Flint Company?" She knew it was a low blow, but she had to make him think._

"_If needs be yes, the Chantry will take care of them." Leigh growled and rose to her feet. Her eyes narrowed._

"_I will never let the Chantry raise my children! If you want to pursue this then try to find us if you ever win your throne, but be warned I will protect my family. I will kill you if you force me to."_

"_You chose this Leigh. I would have given you a safe comfortable life, if you had let me." She blew out a breath and collected her wits. _

"_I know. I love him and always will. It does not mean I don't still care about you. I hope you succeed and help your people. I want you to be happy Sebastian. I love you enough to want that for you."_

"_You still..."_

"_Of course I do. That is why I am here. I wanted to know you were alive and safe. It would hurt me to find out you were gone. I'm sorry." _

"_As am I. I miss you."_

"_I miss you too. I have to go, please think about what I said." She reached for his hand, but stopped short. Sebastian grabbed hers tight and pulled Leigh close. Even if it wasn't real he had to feel her lips on his again. She let him kiss her and hold her tightly. When he finally pulled away he leaned his forehead against hers._

"_You will haunt me for the rest of my days."_

"_I hope not. I want you happy not pining after me. Someone will come into your life and make you forget me."_

"_I will never forget you."_

"_You know what I mean. They will hold your heart and you will hold theirs. It is a wonderful feeling and I want that for you." She pulled away from him and began to fade away. "Maker watch over you Sebastian."_

_'And you as well Leigh." She gave a sad smile and vanished leaving him alone. He became keenly aware that someone was holding his hand in the waking world and a soft voice was talking to him. He willed himself to wake and see who it was._

OoO

Leigh opened her eyes and saw it was still dark outside. They had moved to the palace in Denerim so if anything went wrong they were close to help. Soldier's Peak was a perfect place to hid, but it was far from civilization. She felt Ser Pounce headbutting her hand and she lifted it for him to walk under.

"How do you get to sleep in the bed, but Tovis doesn't?" The cat meowed and tilted his head.

"It is because he doesn't take up most of the bed if he sleeps in it." Anders stood in the doorway and was smiling at his wife. She had been stuck in their room for months now. Only getting up to go over to a padded chair or sit out in the garden outside their room. "How are you feeling love?"

"Like a beached whale." He chuckled and leaned down to kiss her. "I am over being pregnant."

"Well it is not over with you yet. Soon love."

"I want them here now."

"I know so do I."

"Why are you up before the sun?"

"I have a meeting with some leaders of the Resistance. I will fill you in when I get back on what we are planning."

"Please tell me your not going alone."

"I'm not, Cullen and Velanna are coming with me since they are involved too."

"Who would have ever thought Cullen a rebel?"

"You Hawke women make men do strange things."

"You love every minute of it and you know it."

"I do, and I love you my darling wife. You should go back to sleep. I will be back before you now it." He gave her another kiss this one with more passion behind it. It left Leigh breathless and she whined when he broke it off to soon for her liking.

"I hate when you do that since I can't do anything but sit here and look like a big fat chair ornament."

"Love, believe me I want nothing more than to make love to you, but with all the complications you have had these past few months it is better we wait til after they are born. Once your all healed you are in trouble. I will not be letting you out of our bed for days." She giggled at him and shook her head in amusement.

"Who will take care of the babies?"

"My mum will or your sister."

"You have it all planned out don't you?"

"I've had months to plan it. I miss being with you in that way, but I am still here every night holding you."

"And you don't know how grateful I am for that. Go to your meeting I will just stay here in bed and talk to our furry children for company."

"I could ask your sister to come up her and keep you company since her man is coming with me."

"No let her sleep. Our little darlings have taken it that since I am awake so are they. Maker the one on the left can kick." Anders put his hand on her very swollen stomach and grinned like a fool feeling the strong kicks under her skin. He leaned down and cooed at her belly.

"You need to let your mommy sleep little one so she is nice a rested for when you get here." It seemed to work since the kicks stopped at the sound of his voice.

"They always calm down when you talk to them. Must be the sweet sound of your voice."

"Now you can go back to sleep love. I will be back soon." He left after another quick soft kiss and Leigh sat there and petted Ser Pounce A Lot. Tovis whined and she patted the bed for him to jump up and join them. Her trip to the Fade to talk to Sebastian still weighed on her mind. She prayed he would heed her words and not come after them. It would break her heart to have to kill him.

"So boys it is just you and me til Anders gets back. Any suggestions?"

"You must be going mad from being stuck in that bed Hawke, your talking to your animals."

"Varric!"

"How are you doing?"

"I am ready for this to be over. I am tired of sitting out of this war."

"You have plenty of time to join in. Trying to get into Ferelden is worse than trying to get into The Merchants Guild Treasury. I am glad I know people in high places here."

"Isabela and Fenris were here last week, but they had to sail out again."

"I still can't believe Rivani and Broody are together. It's just too weird."

"I think it is cute. They compliment each other."

"If you say so. So how is Blondie?"

"He's...happy."

"He has a lot to be happy about. I am glad that you two are safe. Aveline sends her well wishes, but she can't leave Kirkwall right now. Starkhaven is in a civil war and she is trying to keep the city safe and out of the fight."

"So Goran is fighting to keep the throne then?"

"Yeah seems like he likes taking the people's gold and living high on the hog. Starkhaven is hurting and as much as I hate to say it I hope Choir Boy wins this fight."

"So do I. His people deserve better than Goran."

"Sounds like you miss him?"

"I miss the way things were before the Gallows."

"All the fighting, demons, Qunari and Templars?"

"At least we were all together. Aveline is in Kirkwall with you. Isabela and Fenris are sailing around Thedas bringing allies and supplies. Carver is normally in Highever with Ori. He is here now just because I am due soon he is here. Merrill is with Shyira's people, everyone has gone their separate ways and my family is scattered to the wind."

"Well I am here until the little ones show themselves so I can say I was here to see the birth of the Champion's children."

"Anders said I have at least a week or two left. So you will be here for a while."

"Fine by me. Maybe I will go up the Amaranthine and see if I can teach Sigrun some more about Wicked Grace."

"Oh really, just Wicked Grace?"

'What? She's a nice kid."

"She is not a kid Varric and your smitten."

"Shhhh, Bianca will hear you." Leigh laughed and swung her legs over the side of her bed. She wanted to get up and do the limited amount of walking she was allowed. Her muscles protested and she groaned in pain. "Hey you shouldn't be getting out of bed without help." Leigh felt Varric's hands on her arm and back. "Let me go get someone to help you."

"I'm fine just stiff from being bedridden for the last three months. I am only going into the other room. It is like thirty steps tops." A soft knock on the door made her groan louder. "Varric can you get that? By the time I get there the person will be old and withered." She heard the dwarf chuckle as he headed for the sitting room of their chambers. Leigh flexed her feet and held on to the table to take a few steps.

"How is my beautiful daughter doing today?" Leigh smiled seeing Anders' mother bustle into the room. Over the last five months she had been a Maker send for both Anders and Leigh. Arden had a tray of food in one hand and a change of clothes for Leigh in the other.

"I'm doing alright mum, just bored."

"Once those babes get here you will have your hands full dear. Especially if they are anything like their father. Leo was such an imp."

"He still is. Maker, I just want to be able to see my feet again."

"Very soon now."

"Not soon enough."

"Where is my son this fine morning?"

"Meeting the leaders of the Resistance down in the old Warden hideout. He left about an hour ago."

"At least he is staying close now."

"Was he not staying in the city before?"

"Not all the time Varric, he was going between the Peak and the Tower for a while. We were moved here after I started having complications. Everyone thought it was better to have me close to my sister and Wynne just in case."

"I didn't know it got that bad."

"Come to find out why Wardens don't have children after they join. Most pregnancies don't make it this far. It is too hard on the body." Varric gave her a sympathetic look and helped Arden set the table for breakfast.

"Let me help you to the table dear." Leigh felt a sharp pain in her abdomen and she hissed. "Kicking again?"

"I think so. They must be hungry and are telling me to get a move on." She rubbed her belly to sooth it. "Just a moment more little ones." Arden took Leigh by the elbow and led her to her chair. Before Leigh couold sit down she was hit by another sharp pain that nearly brought her to her knees.

"Leigh?" All the color drained from Leigh's face and she hissed again.

"Varric...g...get Beth. I think...it's time."

OoO

Anders stood in the old Warden hideout with Cullen waiting for the others to arrive. They had mages and some Templars from the Circles around Thedas meeting them here. Queen Ashlyn and Conner Guerrin were the first to show followed closely by Ser Greagoir and most of the Senior Enchanters from the fallen Circle in Ferelden.

"How is Leigh?"

"She is ready for it to be over with. Trying to keep her in bed is not easy."

"She was never one to sit anything out. Hawke women are stubborn."

"Maker help us." Cullen chuckled. "I just hope this meeting goes quickly. I hate leaving her alone for to long."

"Beth will keep an eye on her. Shit!"

"What?"

"Here comes trouble." Anders cursed under his breath as Miranda Amell made her way to where he was standing. She had not taken the news he was married well and was less thrilled that it was her cousin he was married to. "Mira."

"Where is your wife?"

"She had other engagements to attend."

"I guess our plight is not high on her priority list is it?" Anders felt Justice stir for the first time in months and he had to try to stuff the spirit back down.

"She is very supportive of our plight more than you will even know. Ah, it looks like everyone is here. Time to start the meeting." Miranda grabbed his arm to hold him back.

"Then why is it we have never seen her by your side? I am starting to think you have been lying about her." Cullen stepped in to save Anders from his former lover.

"I assure you Enchanter Amell Leigh Hawke is his wife and she is doing things for the Resistance that have her absent from our meetings. Assassins have their uses."

'Assassin?" Anders could have kissed Cullen for that save. He watched Miranda's eyes grow wide and she backed away a few steps.

"Who knows she might be watching from the shadows right now." Both men had to keep straight faces as the skittered away. "That was too easy."

"I knew you had a evil streak in you."

"Just be happy I never used it on you."

"Beth rubbing off on you?"

"Like Leigh hasn't rubbed off on you."

"True, we'd better get in there."

'Did you set the wards?"

"No, go ahead I will be right there." It took him almost no time to set wards to warn them if someone tried to enter the hideout. Plus the added paralysis glyph would buy them time. When he entered the room he heard all of them talking in circles. Each side of the debate was screaming at the other. Ashlyn tried to calm the situation down, but no one would listen. "**ENOUGH!**" He stared around the room and saw all eyes on him. "Now that I have your attention we can discuss this like adults." Ashlyn smiled and nodded that he had the floor. "The Circles in Orlais are the only ones that still stand. We have mages on the inside feeding us information at great personal risk. We have to find a way to free our brothers and sisters."

"How?"

"That is what we are here to start planning. It will take time and since most of the Templars have fallen back to Orlais to regroup it will be difficult to get the Circles to fall."

"It seems impossible."

"Not impossible, it will just take finesse and well laid plans."

"What of this story of a Somniari we keep hearing about?" Miranda rolled her eyes at the mention of a myth.

"They don't exist. It is just a false hope, a myth."

"We are on our own at the moment. Until we get the information from our contacts all we can do now is wait and pray."

"We have been doing that for months now. What aren't you telling us Anders?"

"I have told you all I know Mira. If we move too soon we tip our hand and we lose a lot of good people. I am not willing to have that happen are you?"

"No, but the longer we wait the stronger the Templars become."

"Not really, their numbers are falling with the fighting go on else where. They are all falling back to Orlais."

"So it would be suicide to go there and try to free the mages there."

"We will see." A loud bang made the entire group jump. It was followed by a string of loud swears. "Looks like the wards caught us a spy." Ashlyn drew a dagger and Anders followed close behind her staff at the ready. "Varric! Maker what are you doing here?"

"You need to get back to Hawke now!" Anders swept his hand over the trap and it let Varric go.

'Why? What's wrong?"

"She needs you." Anders did not say anything else he just ran as fast as his feet could carry him. Varric's gaze met Ashlyn and Cullen's and both nodded.

"We will contact all of you when we hear more from our spies. Stay in the city it should only take a few days."

"Why did Anders run off?"

"That is none of your business Enchanter Amell."

"Ye...yes Your Majesty."

"Maker watch over us all." With that Ashlyn and Cullen both took off after Anders and Varric. "Would have to happen the one time we get him to leave her side."

"I just hope she's alright. Varric looked worried."

'We will find out soon enough."

OoO

"Where is he?"

"I sent Varric to go get him Leigh. Anders will be here soon. I need you to breath."

"You try breathing when it feels like you are being ripped in two." Another strong contraction made her scream and she nearly crushed her sister's hand.

"Dammit Leigh that hurt!" Bethany felt guilty when she saw the tears in her sister's eyes. "You'll be alright. You know I won't let anything happen to you or the babies. Anders will be running through that door any minute now. Now you need to relax as much as you can between bouts of pain. I will do what I can to minimize it."

"I'm scared."

"I know, but your in good hands here with me and Arden." Leigh nodded and grit her teeth as Arden pulled her up into a sitting position. They had her on a short cot to help with the birthing. Arden sat behind her and rubbed her back to try to ease some of the discomfort.

"If my son doesn't get here soon he is going to miss everything."

"No I'm not." Leigh looked up and saw Anders rush through the door. "I'm here love." Relief spread through her and she leaned into his fingers as they touched her cheek. "How far apart?"

"Minutes, I have tried to ease some of it to buy you a little time and help her with the pain, but they don't want to wait to greet the world."

"Just like their parents." Leigh hissed and bit her bottom lip to stop her from crying out. She did not know how her mother went through this more than once. The pain was enough that no sane person would want to go through it. She felt Anders' magic seep into her and she sighed in relief. "Better."

"Much, I was beginning to think you were not coming."

"And miss this, not for anything in Thedas. It won't be long now love." He was right the contractions got closer and closer. "Alright love you have to push." Leigh gripped Arden's hands and bared down with every contraction. After what seemed like forever for Leigh she heard a loud bleating cry. She opened her eyes enough to see Anders smiling like a fool at a bundled up wriggling baby. "It's a boy!"

"Let me see him." He leaned in and Leigh began to cry. Their son was large, healthy and strong. He had a full head of hair already and even though it was streaked with blood from his birth she could see it was the same color as Anders. "He's perfect."

"That he is love. Beth can you take him, we still have one more to go." Bethany took her nephew in her arms and cooed at him.

"Maker he is heavy." Arden laughed.

"Just like his Da. Leo was bigger than a fall turkey when he was born."

"Thanks mum, is that a nice way of saying I was a chunky baby."

"You were a normal Anderfel baby." Leigh arched her back as the next one wanted out into the world to join their brother. "Here comes the next one." Anders placed his hands on her stomach to make sure everything was going right. Were the other child was strong with one's heart was weaker.

"Leigh I need you to push again."

"I...can't."

'Yes you can love it is almost over." He saw her body quiver and knew she was tired from the stain of it all. "Beth give the baby to Varric he should be right out the door there. I need you to help me." Beth hurried out the door and placed the boy into Varric's arms. "Love look at me." Her eyes met his and she saw the worry in them.

"Somethings wrong isn't it?"

"The other baby is much weaker than their brother. I need to get them out quickly." Tears rolled down her cheeks and her skin cracked and began to glow red. He felt Pash join her energy with Leigh's to give her enough strength to get through the rest of the birth. "Thank you Pash." It was not long before the other child graced the world with it presence. Where the brother was loud and strong this one was quiet and their color was off. Leigh had passed out right after the baby left her body.

"Son?"

"I need to see if I can get her heart and lungs working better. Beth I need lyrium potions now!" Anders stared down at the small pale child and his heart broke. She was struggling to breath and was so much smaller than her brother. He took her into the other room and laid her down on the bed. "Maker help me." Beth stepped in the room and handed him the potions.

"Let me help you." Beth unwrapped the towel around her tiny niece and gasped. "Oh Maker." The auburn hair told Bethany all she needed to know. This child was Sebastian's not Anders'. "I'm so sorry."

"For what? She is still alive and I plan to keep it that way. I don't care if...she mine. It doesn't matter to me who she looks like." Beth smiled and placed her hands over her niece's heart, pulsing magic to get it pumping better again. Anders worked on her lungs to empty them of the fluid she breathed in during birth. They worked for over an hour til he heard the sound he wanted to hear. A small sharp cry pierced the air and Anders began to cry. "That's my girl, let the world know your not giving up without a fight."

"She's a fighter." Beth leaned back against the bed and sighed. "So you are okay with..."

"I told your sister I would love them even if they were his." Anders sat down next to Bethany on the floor holding his daughter. No one could tell him she wasn't his regardless of her auburn hair or blue eyes. Even her skin was slightly tan just like Sebastian. "Leigh will blame herself for this, won't she?"

"Knowing my sister yes, but the fact you accept this little cutie as your own will make it easier on her. She hasn't voiced it in a while, but she has worried about this since she found out she was pregnant. More so the fact Wardens aren't suppose to be able to have children."

"Well the fear has been quelled. There is no mistaking that boy is mine." Anders smiled down at the little girl who was now wriggling in his arms. He felt tiny little fingers wrap around his much larger one and her grip was strong. He felt a flash of pure light go through him and he heard Bethany gasp.

'What was that?"

"I don't know, but it came from her." Both looked down at the little girl. "Would be irony if she is a mage."

"Yes it would. We should go check on Leigh. She will want to see both her children." Anders stood up and hesitated at the door. "You are a good man and not just because you are excepting a child that is not yours. You are so much like our father."

"I wish I had known him more than that one night I was at your home all those years ago."

"He would have loved you. I know Mama did. She use to tell me after you and Leigh stopped dancing around each other that she thought you were the best person for my sister."

"Your mother was one of a kind."

"Your mother is too. Leigh has told me she loves having her around. It makes missing Mama hurt a lot less."

"Mum loves her."

"Does she know about...this?"

"Yes we both told her just in case. She understood."

"Good. I don't want Leigh feeling any worse than she will be." He nodded and walked through the door. Leigh was still unconscious.

"Mum can you hold her will I clean up Leigh and move her to our room."

"Is the baby alright?"

"She's fine. Just had a little bit of a rough start." Arden saw the hair on top of the girl's head and sighed.

"One from you and one from the other."

"Doesn't matter. I see them both as mine."

"The Maker has blessed you with a large heart Leo. This little one is a precious life and will be loved greatly."

"Yes she will."

OoO

"Anders?"

"Right her love." Leigh opened her eyes and sat up in their bed. "I see Pash did some healing of her own on you."

"She wanted to be helpful."

"The boy is sleeping in the bassinet over there and here is the one you did not meet." He handed her the small bundle and she pulled the fabric back from the top of the baby's head.

"She's..."

"Perfect isn't she?" Leigh nodded through tears. "Justice and I will have our work cut out for us when she is older. We will be scaring off suitors for years." Leigh stared at him opened mouthed. "I told you love even if they were his I would love them because they are yours."

"She's so small."

"Her brother was a womb hog I think."

"Oh so he was just like his father, just you are a blanket and bed hog."

"Funny. They need names before today is gone. It is their name day you know."

"We never really agreed on names."

"Well now that we can see them it will hopefully be easier." Anders got up and went to pick up his son. The boy yawned and settled deep in his father's arms. "The three of you have had a rough day."

"Any names come to mind?"

"Not a one." They both laughed and leaned against each other, each holding a child. The little girl began to fuse and cry. Leigh tried rocking her in her arms and singing but nothing worked. "She should be hungry. Beth just got done feeding her goats milk and I just changed her."

"Here switch with me for a second." She took the boy and shifted the girl into his arms and she quieted right down. "Seems she is daddy's little girl."

"She had me wrapped around her little finger the moment she was born love. I think you have been replaced."

"Your oh so funny."

"I try. Do we still have that locket?"

'Which one?"

"The one with Sebastian's mother's picture and his."

"Somewhere why?"

"I think she looks like a Meghan to me."

"I...it sounds perfect."

"We are not going to hide who she is love it is not fair to her. As long as she knows she is loved no matter what it will be fine."

"I will have to tell him won't I?"

"One day probably, but let's not worry about it now." Leigh stared at her sleeping son's face and a brilliant idea.

"Karl."

"What about him?"

"I want to name him Karl. To honor the man who inadvertently brought us back together."

"I think he would like that. Karl it is then, though I am surprised you did not want to name him after your father."

"I am leaving that honor for Carver or Beth. So Karl and Meghan Hawke."

"Sounds good to me love."

"Do you have a Ser name?"

"Yours is fine Leigh. Mine is a mouthful and hard to pronounce. I don't mind being know as Anders Hawke."

"Or Leo Hawke."

"Makes it easy to hide if we have to having more than one name."

"We don't have to hide here."

"True, but I still don't want to take a chance, not when we have so much more to protect now."

"Your right." She yawned and leaned back in the bed.

"Let me put them in their beds and you and I will try to get some sleep as well. It has been a long day."

"I never thought I would be happier than I was on our wedding day, but I am. I have the man I love and two healthy, beautiful children." Anders finished putting the babies to bed and joined Leigh in theirs. He took solace in the peace of the day knowing it would not last forever, but for today he did not think about the war or Templars. He did not even have his darkspawn nightmares that night like he normally did ever night since his joining. His dreams were peaceful as he lay with Leigh in his arms. He had everything he wanted now. His freedom, his family, now he had to make sure the rest of his kind had the same chance.

**So here it is the birth of the twins and the reappearance of Sebastian. I was trying to finish this chapter for Christmas, but after the week I had last week I did not get as much writing in as I would have liked. I want to apologize to BlairSilver for partially breaking your heart. If it was important to the story both children would have been Anders. I swear it will work itself out. I hope everyone had a good holiday season and if I don't update before then have a Happy New Year. As always thanks for reading and sticking with me this long. All of your reviews and favorites have been what has kept me going. **

**Raven **


	40. Chapter 40

"Ah your finally awake. Good." Sebastian sat up in the bed he had been occupying for the past few days. He had drifted in and out, but now his head seemed much clearer. He sat up and saw a man sitting in a chair by the fire.

"Who are you?"

"My name's Colm McLaughlin. My daughter and I found you being attacked on the road and brought you here to recover from your head injury."

"I...what of the others?"

"I'm sorry lad they did not make it. The Crows normally don't leave anyone alive unless they are told to."

"Maker's mercy."

"Are you hungry?"

"No I..." His stomach rumbled and betrayed him. Colm gave a hardy chuckle and set a bowl of stew in front of the prince.

"Eat up lad. You need your strength."

"You said your daughter and you saved me, where is she?"

"Out fetching firewood and some herbs. I used up my stock healing your head."

"I fell..."

"And hit your head on rock on the road. Your skull was cracked, but I was able to heal it. Though healing is not my strong suit."

"Your a mage?"

"Just figuring that out are you? Yes I am a mage and no I don't belong to the rebellion that started in Kirkwall. My daughter keeps me out of trouble."

"And what a hard job that is." Sebastian turned to the door and saw a woman's legs, but the rest of her was hidden behind firewood stacked in her arms. "I little help Da, These things are heavy." Colm got up and started to take piece after piece of wood from his daughter and pile them next to the fireplace. Once it was all done Kali turned and smiled at the man in her bed. "I was beginning to think you would never wake up. I hope my Da didn't bore you."

"Not at all. I am in debt serah."

"Your welcome. My name is Kali and my father you seemed to have already had a nice chat with."

"Yes, he told me he healed my head wound. I am surprised to see a mage here so close to the main roads."

"We keep to ourselves mostly. Templars have found us a few times, but I can normally talk them out of taking my father away." Sebastian turned a shade of red thinking on how she might have talked them out of it and Kali noticed. "Not in that way I was raised by the Chantry thank you very much."

"I...didn't mean to...forgive me my lady."

"It's fine. I should be thankful you aren't running from the house screaming there is a mage in here."

"You were raised in the Chantry?"

"Yes...Circle mages are not allowed to raise their children. I was taken from birth and trained to be a Templar."

"I was a brother in the Chantry until the Chantry in Kirkwall was destroyed."

'So it's true, you are Prince Vael."

"Aye, I am. My cousin has taken my throne and I want it back."

"To rule like him or to help your people?" Sebastian was a bit taken aback by this woman. She spoke her mind quite freely.

"To fix what my cousin has done. I want Starkhaven to be like it was under my father's rule." Kali smiled and nodded to her father.

"I knew he would no be like his cousin. I plead my sword and shield to you, My Prince."

"You don't have to do that."

"It would be an honor to fight for you and our people."

"What of your father?"

"I can take care of myself lad."

"If the Templars find you they will kill you, after what happened in Kirkwall any mage found is thought to be a blood mage."

"That is why he will be coming with us. He can be your personal healer and I the Templar charged to guard him and you."

"You have thought this out haven't you?"

"Just a little." She looked sheepish for the first time during this whole conversation. She looked a the ground and kicked at the dirt floor of their cabin.

"Can your father heal?"

'How do you think your head got fixed?"

"Alright, seeing as I have no other choice I accept your offer." She opened her mouth to blast him, but shut it when she saw the smirk on his face. "May I borough your sword for a moment?" Kali handed him her longsword and stepped back. "Kneel." Kali knelt in front of Sebastian and felt her sword touch each shoulder. "You are now a knight in my service, Ser McLaughlin."

"I will defend you with my life My Prince." He smiled and looked Kali over. Her chin length honey brown hair framed her face nicely. Her eyes looked like two ice blue ponds. She was quite beautiful for a warrior. Her body was curvy and well muscled and her height was only a few inches shorter than him. If he had to guess her age it would be in her early twenties since she had a little bit of youthful roundness to her face.

"I hope it does not come to that." He handed her sword back to her and sat back down. His head still throbbed a bit and he could feel the knot on the back of his head where he had hit it. "With most of my supporters dead...I 'm not sure how I will win this war."

"The people of Starkhaven will stand up for you, but you will have to show them that you will keep your promises."

"And how do I do that?"

"The Revered Mother can help you with that."

"When can we go see her?"

"As soon as we are sure your up for the journey."

OoO

Leigh awoke to silence and her heart skipped a beat. She ran over to the cribs and saw Karl sleeping soundly, but Meghan was not in her crib. She smiled to herself and knew right were to look to find her daughter. She walked into the other room she and Anders called home for now and found Anders sitting in a chair by the fire holding Meghan. She was asleep on his chest.

"She really does love her daddy doesn't she?" Anders turned his head and smiled.

"Yes she does. I wanted to let you sleep love. I know they have been keeping you up at night."

"I still don't know how my mother did it with three of us in the house. I know Papa helped, but Maker."

"We have a lot of help too Leigh. Mum is glory with them."

"So is Bethany and Wynne. Even Varric has helped out."

"I wish I had been here to see that."

It was...comical to say the least. So when does the Mage Rebellion meet again?"

"Tomorrow and yes I already know your coming with me. I'm not happy about it, but I know why you have to."

"I mostly want to come with you to shut my cousin up."

"Cullen told you didn't he?"

"Yes, and I am not happy about the things she has been saying."

"Leigh don't let her get to you. She is bitter and jealous."

"I know, but..."

"You have nothing to prove love. I am yours and will always be yours." Leigh leaned down a kissed him softly. "I don't want them to know about Pash or Justice if we can help it."

"Believe me I have no intention of telling anyone who does know already."

"Are you sure your up to it?"

"It has been three weeks since I had the twins and between all the healer around here I feel fitter than I did before I was pregnant. I will be fine love."

"We will leave before dawn then." Anders stood up trying very hard not to wake the sleeping baby in his arms. "Hopefully now she will sleep for a while."

"I wish she would do that for me. She is always so fussy when I hold her."

"What can I say love she loves me."

"Your not the one who carried her for nine months." He shook his head and grinned. Once he was sure Meghan stayed asleep in her crib he went back out into the sitting room. He and Leigh talked about the mage uprising and filled her in on all the plans that had made. "You all have been busy, haven't you?"

"We have, but I missed having you with me. It didn't feel right."

"Well I am now able to walk more than ten steps a day."

"I know it was hard on you love, but it was for the best for all three of you."

"I know. Come to bed, it seem we will be having a long day ahead of us tomorrow."

OoO

"Ah Anders, are you all alone again?"

"Mira you know one of these days you will ask me and I will say no."

"Looks like today is not the day." Anders just stared at Miranda Amell and laughed when he saw Leigh walk up behind her cousin.

"You must be Miranda. I've heard a lot about you." Miranda jumped and spun around to face the source of the voice. Her eyes went wide seeing the well equipped rogue whose beauty put hers to shame.

"You are?"

'Leigh Hawke, Anders is my husband." Leigh walked passed the stunned woman and wrapped her arms around her loves neck. "Miss me?" He chuckled and kissed her passionately.

"You have no idea." Miranda stormed away and Leigh could not help but giggle. "That should take her down a peg or two."

"Carver was right, she is very pretty."

"She could not hold a candle to you love."

"Stop it your making me blush. Looks like their starting, we'd better get inside."

"From the information we have gathered it looks like the Divine is not going to try to lead and Exalted March here is Ferelden." Greagoir was the one talking when they entered the room.

"Do we know that for certain?"

'No my Queen we don't. It might be a ploy to get us to lower our defenses."

"Most likely. I don't trust The Empress or the Divine. The borders are being held for now by the Dalish."

"How can we trust the elves? They hate humans." Ashlyn threw a dark look at Miranda Amell and the mage did not flinch. "What if they decide to let the Templars in so they can have this land?"

"The elves have suffered under the Chantry rule too. They are fighting for their freedom just as much as they are fighting for ours. I trust their leader with my life Mistress Amell, but if you feel you would have a better time with the Templars, please by all means leave Ferelden. We do not need someone causing trouble here." Leigh watched her cousin and wondered how did she become so bitter and spiteful.

"I...yes Your Majesty." She looked at the ground and stepped back. Ashlyn turned to Leigh and Anders.

"You two are the leaders of this, what is our next move?" Anders went o open his mouth, but Leigh cut him off.

"We need spies in the Divine's ranks. It is a dangerous job, but without the inside information we will never be able to free the mages in Orlias."

"I already have that covered Hawke. I have two of my best bards there. One of them I think you met, but we will not talk about it here. It seems we have no new information so I will call this meeting for the time being. We will meet again when we know more. I will send word the usual way, til then Maker watch over all of us." The crowd muttered back and left one by one. Leigh could see the fear and hopelessness in their eyes. It hurt her more than she thought it would. Once back at the palace Ashlyn, Anders and Leigh went in to a small sitting room to talk.

"We need a leader to show the Chantry we mean business, but no one wants to lead."

"Well Anders you started it so why don't you lead." Anders shot Ashlyn a look and shook his head.

"I'm not leader, I just blew up a building. You a leader Ash."

"I am, but I have to make sure I take care of Ferelden's interests first. I can't run both the country and the war."

"I'll do it." Anders spun on his heels and stared at Leigh with shock in his eyes. "What? I am use to leading. I also have the spirit of the leader of the last rebellion in my damned head. I am not saying it will be easy, but I have to try."

"What about our children? This will take you away from them more often then not?"

"Love if I don't do this do you really think if the Chantry wins the war our children will be safe. I am doing this for them, for you and for all our kind. I will not stand by hidden while that woman condemns us and hurts our brethren. I have seen enough."

"It looks like you won't be able to talk her out of it Anders."

"No, I didn't think I could, but I had to try. Alright love, what do we do next then?"

"I need to know who theses spies are first off."

"Leliana and the other is one of the assassins that I lead named Cara. Both were sisters in the Chantry at one time in their lives."

"Do you trust them?"

"Completely. I know that is a hard sell for you since you don't know either of them, but I hope after all this time you trust me."

"I do, I am going to have Varric keep his ear to the ground as well. He has a way of getting things that most people could never get."

"Sounds good to me. Once your children are a little bit older we will move you back to Soldier's Peak. Your family will be safe there."

"I hate this."

"Anders we don't have a choice, I just hope our little ones will forgive us for being away."

**I know this is a very short chapter and I'm not sure if I am all that happy with it, but I have been hit with writer's block on both of my Dragon Age fics. I hope to get over that soon. Thank you all for your support and I will get both of these storied back on track.** **I hope you all had a good holiday season and are having a good start to your New Year. I will post soon I hope.**

**Raven**


	41. Chapter 41

It had been over two years since Sebastian had met Kali and now he did not know what he would have done without her. She had been a driving force behind his fight for his throne. Her father was also a Maker send with his spells and potions. He never thought he would ever trust a mage again after what Anders had done, but Colm had changed his mind. The man was no monster. He was just a man trying to live and see his daughter grow up. It was something Sebastian had taken for granted all those years he spent in the Chantry. He thought that mages were tools nothing more even when he befriended Hawke he did not understand. Now he saw things in a new light. He saw how wrong he had been. It did not mean he forgave Anders by any means, but he understood why the man did what he did. All the fighting and the battles to get to where he was standing now taught him a great lesson. In war innocence dies.

"Sebastian?"

"In here." He smiled seeing Kali dressed in noble attire. He knew she preferred her armor, but this made her look soft and radiant.

"What are you doing in here?"

"Just thinking. I still can't believe I am finally here, that all this is mine." She smiled and sat beside him on one of the benches that lined the throne room to his childhood home. Sebastian took her hand in his and gave it a gentle squeeze.

"Do you regret it?"

"No, just the loss of life that it took to get here. It will take a long time to rebuild what was destroyed."

"At least we have a good man on the throne to help us get there."

"I could not have done this without you Kali."

"I think you could have, but I am happy that I helped. I guess I should find a place for my father and I to live after your coronation. It would be improper for us to live here when your prince."

"What if I don't want you to leave?"

"It is not like I am leaving Starkhaven. I will get a home nearby if I can."

"Kali..." He surprised even himself with his boldness as he kissed her. It was short and sweet, but left them both blushing. "Forgive me...I..."

"You have to be with a noble Sebastian. I am a lowly Templar with a mage father to boot. I will only cause you trouble."

"Your father is from a noble house. I could give your title back to you. You more than earned it fighting along side me for these past few years."

"I'm not cut out to be a noble. I don't know the first thing about what fork to use for this or that. I would be an embarrassment to you."

"Never. I finally realized that I want you by my side and no one else Kali. After all we have been through it has been you that has kept me strong and held my council. You who calmed my fears and gave me hope. Who else should I have at my side if not you?"

"What about my father? I can't leave him out there alone the Chantry..."

"He will be my court mage and live here. I swear I will not let them take him away or hurt him Kali." She looked him in the eyes and sighed.

"Your asking for it you know. I will make a fool of myself and you in front of some fat snobby noble and we will be the laughing stock of Thedas."

"Who cares what they think. I love you Kali. That is all that matters."

"I love you too." She leaned forward and kissed his cheek afraid to do anything else. They were both adorably awkward, having both been raised more or less. Sebastian had much more experience when it came to anything physical, but he was just as lost as Kali was when it came to love. Even his love for Hawke was not like this one. Kali had won his heart with her spirit and loyalty. "I should go tell my father the good news. I will see you at dinner?"

"Aye." He watched her walk out of the room. It seemed to him the room seemed dimmer without her there. He looked up at the statue of Andraste and he smiled. "I get it now. Revenge makes me no better than Anders and if I had been bitter towards Colm I would not have Kali by my side. I have to find a way to see Hawke and...apologize." The sound of heavy boots made Sebastian turn around and greet one of his generals.

"I am sorry to just barge in here My Prince, but we have word from Orlais and the Divine. She requests our help in invading Ferelden."

"Why?"

"Ferelden is harboring most of the mages that have escaped from the Circles around Thedas. We tried not to tell you much during our own war, but the mages leader embarrassed the Divine and her Templars by sneaking most of the mages out of the Orleasian Circles."

"So Anders is in Ferelden?"

"I have not heard that name spoken much. The leader's name is Hawke as far as I have been told."

"Hawke?"

"That is the rumor the people are spreading. The Champion of Kirkwall is now the leader of the mage rebellion. It is said she is the only one they listen to. For one woman to have that power...reminds one of Andraste."

"Yes it does, just the positions are reversed. Still my answer is no. Our people need peace and a chance to rebuild. This war has taken enough from them. Starkhaven is staying out of the Chantry's war on the mages."

"As you wish Your Majesty. I will have the Senechal write the letter for you."

"I can write it myself thank you. Please send Asha in I would like to speak to her." The general bowed and left the room. Shortly after the man left a woman dressed in black leather armor walked in.

"You wanted to see me My Prince?"

"I do indeed. I need a favor of you and I need it kept quiet."

"As you wish. What do you need of me?"

"I know Queen Ashlyn sent you and a few others to aide my cause and I would like to send a letter of thanks."

"Ferelden is a difficult place to enter nowadays. Unless you are a mage or a countryman with proof you are Ferelden it is impossible."

"I would not ask if it wasn't important. I need to warn Ashlyn about the Divine and Orlais." He explained to the rogue what his general had asked him and she shook her head in disbelief.

"The Divine asked Starkhaven to march against Ferelden so soon after you ended your own war?"

"I will not do that to my people or to a friend who aided me in getting my throne back. I asked for help from Orlais and the Chantry both told me that they had better things to do with their armies. Now looking back it was for the best. Ashlyn did not publicly help me because of the war going on in Thedas."

"She thought it best to help in secret lest the Divine send aide to your cousin instead. She did not want you to face that."

"She was always one step ahead of things as a child, I guess it has not changed. Will you take this letter for me?"

"Of course and if I might make a suggestion?"

"Yes?"

"Contact the Captain of the Guard in Kirkwall, if the Divine is unhappy with your refusal to help she might think you are siding with Ferelden even though you are not. If Starkhaven and Kirkwall stand together she might think twice."

"Has Kirkwall recovered?"

"Under Aveline it has. She is running the place til the nobles get their act together. I know I wouldn't cross her."

"I don't think Aveline will want to help me. She and Hawke were great friends. After what I said..."

"I know Leigh Hawke better than most Your Majesty, she only holds grudges if you act on your threat. Then I would suggest you hide and never come back, because she will find you and you will die."

"You know Hawke?"

"I trained her."

"You...Maker."

"I did not want yo tell you back then because of your anger towards her and her lover. It was partly Ashlyn asking me to come here, but what clinched it was Leigh asking me to make sure you were safe. She cares for you much more than you know."

"If you see her...tell her thank you and to not worry. I will not...Anders is safe from me."

"I am sure she will be very grateful as will the Grand Cleric."

"Ferelden's Grand Cleric? Why would she be grateful?"

"Not Ferelden's, Kirkwalls, Elthina is alive and living in Ferelden."

"Then she wasn't lying to me...I...I will have the letters for you by tonight to take." Asha nodded and took her leave. "Asha."

"Yes."

"Thank you."

"It has been my pleasure to serve you Prince Vael. Leigh was right when she told me you were a honorable man."

"She always did see the best in all of us, even when we couldn't."

"It is one of her many talents."

"Yes, yes it is."

OoO

Leigh Hawke flopped into a chair at Soldier's Peak. The journey through the Deep Roads with the Orlesian Mages was a grueling one. It was the only way they knew that the Templars would not follow. She was thankful to the Wardens who went with her on this mission. She was even more thankful to have Anders by her side through it all. They had saved most of the mages in Olais. Something that was thought impossible, but thanks to maps give to her by Sigrun she was able to make a plan. It took over two years to execute, but it had worked and now Ferelden stood as the country with most mages by far of any other in Thedas.

"It went well I take it?" Leigh looked up bleary eyed and saw Ashlyn stand in against the wall of her room.

"Better than I hoped, but we lost some to the darkspawn and will lose more to the Blight."

"Is that were Anders is?"

"Yes, he is trying to make them as comfortable as possible before..."

"It is something we Wardens know well I am sorry to say. I really thought one of these days you would scream at me for making him a Warden."

"You saved him from the Templars and gave him freedom. I can't blame you for helping him. He and I have three wonderful children who will help me cope when his time comes. I wish I could go with him..."

"He will not be alone when his Calling happens. There are plenty of us that will be right there with him."

"I know, It is just..."

"Alistair and I are the same way. It is the whole soulmate thing. One can not live without the other."

"Very true. If not for Karl, Meghan and Drea I don't think I could survive losing him in that way."

"I wanted to give this to you. Asha said Starkhaven is now under the rule of it's rightful prince." Ashlyn handed Leigh a letter and she took it cautiously. She read the first few lines and her hand went to her mouth. Tear welled up in her eyes and she quickly wiped them away.

"He has forgiven me and Anders. Maker how...?"

"He wrote to me as well thanking me for my help even as sparse as it was. He is to be married in a few weeks to a woman that lead his army. Her father is a mage and she a Templar."

"How can he marry her is she is not..."

"She is of noble blood and even if she wasn't I don't think his people would begrudge him if he married her. She is well loved by the people."

"I am happy for him. He deserves happiness."

"Yes he does and he also wanted to warn me that the Divine asked for him to send his army to march against us."

"What did he say?"

"He told her no, that his people did not need to jump into another war when they had just finished fighting one. He also does not want to betray a country that help him when no other would."

"Thank the Maker."

"My thoughts exactly. Have you seen your little ones yet.?"

"No, not yet. I wanted to clean up first and wait for Anders. He has missed them so much." The sound of little feet running down the hall made Leigh smile. "I guess they heard I was home." The first one through the door was Karl. He looked like is father in every way, same hair, same eyes and the same face. Leigh smiled and held up her hands for him to stop before he could hug her. "Mummy is covered in icky stuff baby I don't want you to get sick." Ashlyn picked him up and held him til Leigh could get herself clean and new clothes on. "Alright, all clean. Come here my little man." Karl giggled and hugged his mother tight. Arden had entered the room and was holding the youngest Hawke, Drea. Drea was a perfect mix of her mother and father. She had blonde hair and her eyes were liquid silver like her mother's. "Where's Meghan?"

"She wanted Da." Leigh felt her heart jump up into her throat.

"Did she go down to the infirmary?"

"Yes Mummy." Leigh put Karl down and started running toward the stairs to the lower levels of the keep.

"Arden keep them up here!" Arden turned to Ashlyn her face confused.

"What's wrong?"

"They had to bring the mages back through the Deep Roads. Some of them contracted the Blight."

"Holy Maker..."

"I am going to go help her stay here and keep the children away from the infirmary." Ashlyn ran after Leigh. The infirmary was in the lowest part of the castle. Normally they had no use for it, but with at least a dozen mages inflicted with the Blight it was now in use. Anders and Velanna were working tirelessly to make the people comfortable before the end. Some of them were worse off than others, but the healer in him did not want to give up even when he knew it was going to end in death.

"Vel can you hand me the black bottle?" The elf gave him a sad look and handed him the bottle of potent poison. It would put the person to sleep then stop their lungs. It was the most humane way to do it.

"I hate this."

"I am not happy about it either, but it is better than having to end them with a sword. I will start over there with the worst cases. Maker forgive me for this."

"You are doing the right thing Anders." He nodded and started pouring the liquid into small cups. His hand shook as he did it, more out of frustration than fear. He was so focused on his work he did not notice Meghan walk in the room or see her head over to one of the worse off mages. The man was curled up in pain and thrashed around as the Blight ate away at what was human about him. Meghan cocked her head to the side and looked the man over. His skin was gray and rough, his face was already starting to change into malicious mask that all darkspawn had. The man's breathing was ragged and his hands twisted into misshapen clawed digits.

"Meghan get away from him!" Her mother's voice made the little girl jump. Anders wheeled around from his work and looked on in horror as the mage Meghen was standing by rose from his cot. The change was done and now what ever he was before was gone. In his place was a darkspawn emissary. Leigh hit the creature with a push spell to knock him back away from her daughter. "Meghan, baby come to Mummy." Anders started to glow and Justice pushed his way forward. The emissary growled and threw a fire spell at his attacker as he crept closer to the little girl.

"Meghan go to your mother now!" Justice's voice was full of fear and anger. Leigh moved to get closer to Anders in attempts to grab her daughter away from the darkspawn. She held out her hands, but Meghan did not budge. She turned around to the emissary and tilted her head as he snarled at her. The monster reached for the girl and the room filled with the screams of her family. None of them was close enough to get to the girl in time to stop the darkspawn from hurting her. Leigh lunged forward and was pushed back by a blinding white light. The room filled with the light then it faded. Anders had taken back control and raced over to where Meghan was standing. He gathered her up in his arms and checked her over. Leigh got up and stumbled over to her family.

"Is she...?"

"I don't thing it touched her." Anders continued to look the girl over and found nothing out of place. No scratches or marks from a spell she was perfectly fine. "Sweetheart did he touch you?"

"No Da. I helped."

"I know you wanted to help him, but he was very sick little one. He is beyond healing."

"He had black inside him. I made it better." Anders looked at his daughter with a confused look on his face. "Look." Meghan pointed over his shoulder and he turned around to see where the darkspawn fell.

"Maker's breath! How...?" The mage groaned and sat up from the floor. All the corruption was gone from his skin. He was human again. "You did that?"

"Light." Meghan held up her hand and it pulsed with pure white light. Leigh gasped at the sight of her three year old using magic. "I help." Pash answered Leigh's question before she could ask it.

"_She is Somniari like you, but her power is healing like Anders. She has purity on her side to be able to destroy the taint without killing the host of it." "Purity?" '"It is the rarest of spirits, because to find a truly pure soul is almost impossible." "So my daughter is possessed like me and Anders?" "No I don't think she is possessed, I think she is a spirit of purity."_

"Leigh?"

"Pash thinks she is the embodiment of a spirit of purity."

"A what?" He looked into Meghan's eyes as she smiled back at him. She had no fear of what she had just faced. "Have you done this before sweetheart?" She shrugged and leaned into her father putting her head on his shoulder. "Maker is no one in this family normal?" Anders handed Meghan off to Leigh and went to check on the man who until just a few minutes ago was destined for death. His magic rolled through the mage and it found not hint of the Blight anywhere. "His blood is clean."

"So is this one." Velanna had started checking all the mages in the room and found all of the taint was gone. "Gods she did it. She cured them all!" Ashlyn stepped forward and shared a look with her fellow Wardens.

"If it took the taint from them, then what did it do to us?"

"I..." Anders thought back to the day the twins were born. The white light that pulsed from Meghan to him when she grasped his finger. With all they had been doing with the war he had not really noticed his nightmares were all but gone. It hit him then she had cleaned the taint from him. "She...cured me the day she was born. I really haven't had the darkspawn nightmares since then, but I didn't realize it til now. I can still feel them, but it is not the same. It is almost like she took away the bad parts about being a Warden and left only the useful bits."

"What does that mean?" Anders smiled at his wife and wrapped his arms around her and Meghan.

"I means no Calling and no becoming a darkspawn. It means I don't have to leave and neither do the rest if Meghan heals them." Meghan lifted her head from her mother's shoulder and nodded.

"I help?" She looked sleepy, like the spell had taken a lot out of her.

"If you want to sweetheart, but right now I think it is bed time. We can figure this out tomorrow. I want to see your brother and sister after I make sure all these people are alright."

"I want a story."

"I will be up to read you one soon." Leigh took Meghan back up to their rooms while Ashlyn and Velanna stayed with Anders.

"I'm almost afraid to hope. Could she really stop us from having to go to our Calling? Stop us from becoming what we fight?"

"I think so, but it seems the magic drains her so I want to be careful with this. She's just a baby."

'She's your baby and I understand. I am going to check with Avernus and see what he has to say, but I will leave out the part about Meghan."

"Thank you, because if that bastard comes near her I will let Justice have some fun."

"Hence why I am not going to tell him who did it, if it actually worked on us like it did on them. If it did..."

"If it did I want you to send word to Alistair and get him here. It seems she wants to rid us of it, to help us."

"Go and be with your family Anders. Vel and I can make sure the mages are alright."

"If your sure?"

"You promised to read your little one a story I think it would be good if you did it before she fell asleep." He nodded and left the infirmary. Velanna stood next to Ashlyn and shrugged her shoulders.

"Do you think it could be true?"

"One way to find out. After we finish here do you want to join me in talking to the creep ancient mage in the tower?"

"Well when you put it that way, no, but I won't let you deal with him alone. So let's finish up and go see the old bat."

OoO

Anders stared down at his sleeping twins and could not help but smile. It did not take long into the story he was reading for them both to drift off to sleep. He quietly shut their door and went into his and Leigh's room. Leigh was bathing Drea before putting her down for the night. She was lost in thought it seemed when he put his arm around her waist.

"Sorry love, I didn't mean to startle you."

"It's alright, just...we came so close to losing her Anders. It scared me to death and now to find out she is like me. I don't know if I can handle this, the war and everything else."

"Love, she has two mage parents that can help her and our extra baggage upstairs to boot. We will get through this."

"I know, but..."

"Leigh, no buts. We will face this together."

"Like always."

"Yes. Let's put Drea to bed before she prunes."

"Maker's breath she already is pruned." Anders chuckled and handed her a towel.

"It's not that bad. Love your shaking, go sit down I will put her to bed." Leigh nodded and sat on their bed waiting for him to finish. "Leigh?"

"I'm fine, just tired and overwhelmed."

"Something else is bothering you."

"You know I hate you can read me so well now. I was thinking about what you said about Meghan. If she really did take the taint out of your blood two years ago, is that the reason we have Drea?"

"Could be. Maker knows I don't miss the nightmares."

"I can imagine. I hated seeing you go through them. I felt helpless and even more so when I found out about the Calling. To even have the glimmer of hope you don't have to go away is enough for me."

"I will go see Avernus tomorrow to see if it is true. I am not fond of the man at all, but he knows what he is doing." Leigh leaned against his shoulder and sighed. "We both need sleep love."

"I don't know if I can."

"I'm sure I can help you with that."

"You know full well sleeping spells don't work on me."

"I wasn't thinking any spells." He gave her a lecherous grin and she laughed.

"Hmm, I guess that could help."

"If you don't want to..." Leigh cupped his chin and kissed him deeply.

"You talk to much love." Anders leaned over and blew out the candle casting the room into shadow. Tonight was for them and their victory in getting the mages away from the Divine. Tomorrow they would worry about Meghan's powers and Anders mortality.

**Yay for writer's block being gone finally. Thank you all for your patience with me. Having three stories going at once is rough, but I am getting better at juggling my three ladies. Thank you all again for your support. It means the world to me.**

**Raven**


	42. Chapter 42

Anders woke to someone touching his arm. It took him a moment to figure out it wasn't Leigh who was touching him. She was still fast asleep buried under their blanket. He slowly turned over so not to wake her and saw Meghan standing there. Her face was wet with tears and she was clutching her stuffed cat. He threw back the covers and got out of bed taking the little girl in his arms. He took her into the sitting area of their room and sat down in his chair.

"What's the matter sweetheart?"

"Had a bad dream." He took a handkerchief and wiped the tears from her face and sat her on his knee.

"Was it about the scary man from earlier today?" She nodded and leaned her head against his chest. "He can't hurt you Meghan."

"He was sick."

"Yes he was, but you made him all better. I am so proud of you. I have a feeling you will be a better healer than me one day."

"Da, am I yours?" Anders looked down at his daughter and could not hide the pain in his face. He had hoped this question would wait a few more years before rearing its ugly head.

"Why do you ask that?"

"I heard Aunt Addy talking to Gran...she said I wasn't yours." Anders had a great desire to go smack his sister in the back of the head at that moment. She had voiced her opinion very loudly that she was not happy Meghan was not his child by blood. He knew it was her being a protective sister, but it still bothered him. Now he had to quell his daughter's fears and lie to her. That hurt worse than the fact she wasn't truly his.

"Your mine Meghan. I have loved you your entire life and will always love you. Your my little girl."

"Drea is the little one. I'm a big girl." She pushed her lips out into a pout and he laughed. She very much looked like her mother when she did that. She might have had Sebastian's eyes, hair color and skin color, but she looked every bit like Leigh.

"Yes you are a big girl and a very brave one at that." Meghan wrapped her small arms around her father's neck and kissed his cheek. "Now do you think you could go back to sleep?" She shook her head and pouted again. "Is something else scaring you?" She nodded and jumped down from the chair taking his hand she led him to her room she shared with her sibling. She showed him the candle had burned out and the room was thrown in shadow. Karl could care less about the dark, but Meghan never liked it. "I see the light went out."

"Don't like the dark."

"I know, I will get another candle for you." He hurried and grabbed a few candles from the other room and placed them in the holders in the children's room. "Do you want me to light it the old fashioned way or with magic?"

"Magic." He smirked and light a tiny flame on his pointer finger. Meghan stared at it in wonder. He went to light the candles, but stopped when he saw his daughter had lite a small flame in her hands. Her voice was a whisper. "I can do it too Da."

"Yes you can. Tomorrow after lunch you and I will have to start working on that won't we?" She nodded and climbed into her bed. Anders tucked her in and kissed her head. "Goodnight sweetheart."

"Night Da." He left the room and found Leigh standing around the corner. Her face was a mask of amusement. He put his finger up to signal her to be quiet and they retreated to their room.

"I was wondering where you got off to."

"She had a nightmare."

"About today?"

"Yes, but I think it was more she saw we were upset. At the time she was not afraid."

"I heard what she asked you. Can I kill your sister?"

"No love, you can't. I don't think Addy knew Meghan was there. It was a slip nothing more."

"I hope your right. The questions I get from Meghan are hard enough."

"Which questions?"

"Why don't I look like my brother and sister? Why am I different? It breaks my heart. How can I tell her...?"

"We will cross that bridge when we come to it Leigh. She knows she is loved and that is all she needs right now. I plan on beginning her training. When we head back to Denerim next week I will have Wynne help me and Bethany. Meghan will have ever resource at her disposal."

"I know." Anders hugged his wife tightly and felt her relax in his embrace. "I am going with you in the morning to see this Avernus."

"No your not. I don't want you anywhere near that man Leigh."

"Do you really think I am going to sit here and wait. I have to know Anders...if I'm going to lose you or not."

"Leigh...I don't want you to get your hopes up. Those men had only been tainted for a few days. It has been over ten years for me."

"But you said you haven't had the nightmares in years."

"That could just be Justice blocking it or there are not a lot of darkspawn around. It could even be the fact your presence soothes me."

"I can still hope. I lost you once, I will not lose you again without a fight Anders."

"We have here and now. Anything else in not guaranteed." The look of utter pain on her face made Anders sigh. "Alright you win, but do not drop your guard around him. The bastard bloody hates me so he will probably try to pick a fight."

"Why does he hate you?"

"I...the last time I was here, before Kirkwall, He and I got into a row. I sort of trashed his laboratory and he tried to kill me."

"Oh that is comforting. You just can't play nice with anyone can you?"

"He used his fellow Wardens as lab rats. Tried to figure out how to use the taint in our blood to make better soldiers. He also made a deal with a demon and is over two hundred years old, so I think I was justified in what I did."

"Do I have to worry Justice or Pash will want him dead?"

"You just might what to be prepared for anything. He might just throw me out when he sees me."

"Won't Ash have something to say about it?"

"I hope so. He does listen to her, but I think it is a equal part respect and fear. She can be down right scary."

"So can I."

"I remember love. Come back to bed. We have a few hours til dawn."

"Hmmm, what do do with those hours?"

"Your going to be the death of me, but Maker it will be a fun death."

OoO

Ashlyn and Velanna met them at the door to Avernus' tower. Anders shifted his weight from side to side and fidgeted while the women talked. He hated this place almost as much as he hated the Circle. He looked at Ashlyn and she gave him a encouraging smile.

"He won't do anything Anders so stop worrying."

"He tried to kill me that last time, I think I have a right to worry."

"I stopped him before he put you in that contraption didn't I?" Leigh's eyes went wide and she looked between the two Wardens for an answer to her unspoken question. Anders answered her first.

"He tried to put me in a iron maiden with spikes to bleed me dry."

"And you let him live here why?" Ashlyn sighed and shook her head."

"I let him live because he was suppose to be looking into a way for the Wardens to live longer fuller lives. That was his penance for what he did all those years ago. I also owe him for helping me be able to have Duncan. His potions and magic made the impossible, possible."

"That is the only thing I am grateful to him for Ash. That man is a monster."

"I know, but a useful one."

"Let's get this bloody over with. The sooner I am away from him the better." The four walked the breeze way to the tower in silence. Ashlyn and Velanna entered first while Leigh and Anders lagged behind. The place smelled of decay and dark magic. Leigh inched herself closer to her husband and shivered a bit. "You don't have to do this."

"Yes I do." He nodded and went through the door. Ashlyn and Velanna were talking to Avernus by the time they entered the mage's tower. Anders hung back in the shadows listening to the old mage and trying to hold back Justice. The spirit had a even bigger dislike of the Warden blood mage than Anders did. Avernus stopped talking when he saw the blonde man standing in the doorway.

"What is he doing here?"

"Hello to you too Avernus."

"Get out!" Ashlyn put her hand up and stepped between the two men.

"I asked him to come here Avernus. He is the other one who's blood needs to be tested."

"No, I will do nothing for him." The ancient mage turned his back on them and began to walk away. Leigh sidestepped Anders and went after the man.

"If you will do nothing for him will you do it for his children. They would like to know if they are going to lose their father to the Blight in twenty years or not." Avernus glared at Leigh and looked her over.

"Wardens can not have children, not without help. Do not try to play on my sympathies girl."

"I would never do such a thing. I am his wife and we do have children, three in fact."

"Impossible. Even with my help it took the Commander years to conceive her son. And you claim to have three children, you waste my time." Leigh growled and pushed the mage against a wall. Her dagger just inches from his throat.

"I tried to be nice now I will threaten. You will help us or so help me I will send you to the Void." Ashlyn went to grab Leigh and pull her off Avernus, but Anders caught her arm and shook his head. Leigh's skin was starting to show signs of Pash taking over.

"I have lived for over two hundred years. You think death frightens me?"

"Yes I do or you would have never made a deal with a demon."

"And so have you." The red cracks in Leigh's skin got larger and Pash pushed herself forward.

"I am no demon mortal. I am her guardian. She asks for a simple thing and you would rather hold a grudge. Have you never loved another?"

"Love is a farce. It is a lie we tell ourselves so we think we are not alone."

"You are a fool. Love is a gift for those lucky enough to find it. You are just a bitter man who cares more for his experiments than he does for his fellow man. I pity you." Avernus hissed and called a fire ball into his hand. Pash smiled and grabbed his wrist. The spell died as fast as it came. "You are not strong enough to fight me mortal." Ashlyn put her hand on Pash's shoulder and pulled her back.

"Please spirit this is not the way."

"You are right, I apologize. This place, there is so much pain here. I forgot myself."

"I understand. Avernus, Anders does have three children and this is his wife. Please look past your hatred of him and help us." Avernus watched the red glow fade from Leigh. She took a few steps over to Anders and wrapped her arms around him.

"What is she?"

"She is a mage and the leader of the freedom movement for all mages in Thedas."

"But she is possessed."

"By a spirit of compassion." Anders looked up and his eyes met Avernus'.

"Fine, just don't touch anything or I will..."

"Understood." Anders nodded and led Leigh to the back of the room.

"I will need blood from the three of you. Only a small amount." Ashlyn rolled up her sleeve and let the man cut her forearm. Next was Velanna who cut her own arm and Anders let Leigh do his. Avernus took the samples and walked over to a small table. "This will take some time. Come back in an hour I will have your answer."

"Thank you Avernus."

"Yes, yes just leave me to this I need to concentrate." He waved them off and went back to his work. Once outside Ashlyn sighed.

"Now we wait."

"Maker, I hate waiting."

"So do I Anders, but if that's what it takes to find out if we are no longer tainted I will gladly wait the hour."

"I know Ash."

OoO

Sebastian paced his room trying to quell his anger. The letter he had been reading was now balled up on the floor. It had been only a week since he sent his answer to the Divine that he would not be getting his country involved in the mage war. Her answer back to him was more a threat than anything else. She and her guard were coming to strong arm him into complying and it made his blood boil. His anger rose again and he slammed his hand down on his desk. The feeling of soft warm hands on his own cooled his ire if only a little.

"What has you so upset Sebastian?" Kali's eyes were filled with concern.

"It is nothing."

"Nothing would not have you this angry." He sighed heavily and went to retrieve the letter from the floor. He uncrumpled it and handed it to his future bride. She read it and her face mirrored his own. "She can't do this!"

"She thinks she can. She will be here in three weeks give or take. I need to go to Kirkwall and ask for help. I want you to come with me, your father as well. I am not taking any chances. She has gone mad."

"I agree, but what is in Kirkwall?"

"Old friends, at least I hope they are still my friends. They might be able to help or at least give me advice. I will not let out people be drug back into another war." Kali smiled and leaned her head against his shoulder.

"When do we leave?"

"In the morning. We travel light and fast. I don't want to draw attention, just in case she has spies here already."

"Which she probably does. I will go pack and inform my father. I will see you at dinner."

"I would like it if you come back here before that."

"Of course. I will return soon." Sebastian listened to her footsteps fade and he began to feel utterly alone again. Kali's presence made him feel at peace even when they were fighting his cousin's soldiers. Her easy demeanor reminded him a Hawke's. He shook his head bitterly at the thought of a woman he had loved so much, but was never able to truly have. The dream he had almost three years ago came back to him. Hawke had wished him to find someone that would hold his heart more than she ever did. Someone who would be his match in every way. He was sure now he had found it in Kali.

"You look so deep in thought Your Majesty." The voice that came from behind him made his jump and spin on his heels. His work dagger was in his hand to face this intruder.

"Asha I thought you left!"

"I was going to, but I received word the Divine sent you a message again and I wanted to make sure it was not bad news."

"I am sorry to inform you it is. She is coming here before the month is out. She wants to "talk"."

"That sounds ominous. So what are you planning?"

"I need to talk to Aveline and Varric. Maybe I can convince them to help me hide Kali and her father for a while."

"You think the Divine will cause them harm?"

"I am not willing to take that chance." Asha took the letter from his desk and read it. Her brow furrowed and she placed it back on the table.

"I think it would be better is we get the three of you out of here."

"I can't leave my people defenseless. I can't leave."

"How many people do you think live in Starkhaven proper?"

"A few hundred in and around the castle. Why?"

"I need to send word to Ferelden and go talk to Varric myself. I have a plan, but it will take careful planning and skill. I hope you remember your rogue ways Sebastian. This will not be easy."

"Tell me what you are thinking." He listen to the older woman and his eyes went wide. If this worked it would mean he would be a enemy of the Chantry just as Hawke and Ashlyn were. A part of him wanted to say no, but the thought of losing his love and the suffering of his people made him nod to answer Asha. He sent a silent prayer to the Maker for forgiveness. "Contact them. I will see what I can do here to make sure my people will not suffer."

"As you wish Your Majesty."

"What I wish is for peace, but I will fight to protect what is mine."

"As will we all." Asha left him and Sebastian fell to his knees. The Chant began spilling from his lips and he closed his eyes. He heard Kali before he felt her touch, but he did not open his eyes. She knelt beside him and began to recite the Chant along with him. Her head resting on his shoulder and his arms around her they sat there for hours. Colm silently watched them from the doorway. He had not prayed in a long time, but found himself sending a silent prayer for the two young lovers to the Maker. If it meant they would live a peaceful he would gladly lay down his life or face the Tranquility brand. He might not have been able to be there for most of Kali's life, but he would be damned if he let the Divine hurt his little girl now.

**Sorry about the long delay everyone. I lost most of this chapter when my computer crashed two weeks ago. I have written and rewritten it over four times and this was the only draft that made me somewhat happy. Thank you all for your patience and I hope you continue to enjoy. **

**Raven**


	43. Chapter 43

Avernus called them all back to his lab over three hours later. When they got there he was pacing and mumbling to himself. Ashlyn and Anders both could tell the man was aggravated, but were unsure why. Ashlyn and Velanna entered the room first trying to calm the elderly mage so he could give them an answer one way or another.

"Avernus?" The man jumped and spun around clutching his chest.

"Commander you should not sneak up on me like that."

"I am sorry old friend. You look perplexed."

"More than you could ever know. I tested your blood and what I found I can't explain."

"Sit down and try." The old mage sat down in his worn old chair and tried to think of what to say.

"Your blood showed signs of the taint as did Velanna's, but it was slowly being erased. Almost like something was eating away at it. I even tried to re-taint the blood and it did not work. The blood was resistant to it." The old mage pointed a boney finger at Anders. "His blood on the other hand was clean, completely and utterly clean. If I had not known him to be a Warden I would suspect that he was never tainted."

"So what does it mean Avernus?"

"It means that what ever did this could cure all the Wardens and none would have to go to their Callings. It means that you are no longer true Wardens."

"But I can still feel the Darkspawn when they are near. I still have the Warden's stamina and appetite."

"Without the taint in your veins I can't see how."

"I'm not sure why myself, but that is how it is Avernus."

"What did this?"

"Magic."

"I know that fool, but whose magic? Was it an old spell or potion? How were you completely cured?"

"I..." Leigh stepped forward and placed her hand on her husband's shoulder.

"We don't know what happened. All we saw was a blinding flash of light and magic went through us. Anders was the closest to it."

"Where were you?"

"Down in the cellar of this place."

"This place was built a long time ago. Maybe the Wardens were working on something or woke something that was there. I will need to study it further, but it looks like all of you are clear of the taint and can't be tainted again."

"Thank you Avernus. If you learn anything new please let me know."

"I will Commander. This will be my top priority." The four left the mage's tower and waited to talk til they were out of ear shot of everyone else.

"Ashlyn can it be...we are not..."

"It looks that way Vel. I...Maker's breath I have to tell the others. If we can get them all here Meghan will only have to do her trick once. That is if it alright with both of you."

"As long as Meghan is willing to do it then we give our blessing Ash. Leigh and I talked about it at length while waiting for Avernus. We want the others to be rid of the Blight as well."

"I will send word to everyone and have them meet us in Denerim. We will be leaving here in a few days. Now that the mages are no longer a problem. We can send them to Kinloch with Levi's brother."

"It will be good to see Beth again and Carver. I like it up here, but it is rather lonely."

"Yes it is. I will see you two later. Vel and I have to get things ready for the trip. You have enough to pack with your little brood."

OoO

Sebastian shifted his weight nervously waiting in the Viscount's Keep for Aveline to see him. He was not sure what to expect in this meeting. Would she greet him with open arms or would she tell him to go to hell? He wasn't sure which one would bother him more. Kali stood next to him her hand entwined with his while her father looked around at the ceiling. The clang of armor announced Aveline's presence before she could be seen. She stopped dead in the stairs and stared at Sebastian, her expression unreadable. She slowly started to walk their way and Sebastian made a audible gulp.

"Prince Vael, I was not expecting to see you again, at least not without and army at your back."

"You look well Aveline."

"Thank you, not to be rude, but why are you here?"

"I came to ask for help."

"If it is to hunt Hawke or Anders then the answer is no. I have enough to deal with here."

"It is nothing like that, I...I want your help in protecting my lands and people from the Divine." Aveline's eyes went wide and she motioned for them to follow her. She led them into her office and shut the door.

"Why would you need my help against the Divine?"

"She sent me this once I won the right to rule my lands again. She wants us to join her army to fight Ferelden. I refused. My people have been through enough, I will not enter another war." Aveline sat on the corner of her desk and read the letter. She shook her head sadly and handed the parchment back to the prince.

"She sent me a similar letter. I refused to answer it. I have enough on my hands here as it is. I will not attack my homeland no matter who asks. The woman is insane."

"Aveline...she is after Hawke isn't she?" Aveline's eyes narrowed for a split second before she answered. The guilt on Sebastian's face was clear enough for her to read.

"Hawke is the leader of the mage rebellion, so yes I would have to say the Divine is after her. Does that change your answer?"

"No, not in the slightest. I...I know that no one died in the Chantry when it was destroyed. My hatred of Anders was unfounded."

"How did you find out?"

"Asha told me."

"And did you believe her?"

"Aye, I did. Hawke has nothing to fear from me."

"She wasn't afraid of what you would do to her Sebastian, it was what you threatened to do to Anders that concerned her."

"I know. Aveline I do not want to fight in another war, my people can not endure it. I can't endure it. I came here to ask your help and pray you will listen."

"What do you need of me?"

"I need safe passage for a mage to Ferelden." Kali let out a gasp as did her father.

"Sebastian?"

"If the Divine's army marches on us Kali I will not have them rip your father away and do Maker knows what. I saw what it did to my friend when they took her sister. I want to spare you that pain."

"Will he be safe in Ferelden?" Aveline put her hand on Kali's shoulder and smiled.

"Ferelden is the only place he will be safe for right now. Mages from all over are flocking there for shelter from the Templars, as well as the Chantry. I can have him on a ship in two days."

"That soon?"

"Yes the ship is here already and is waiting for some cargo."

In cargo you mean..."

"Normal cargo, but they will take any mage with them as well. The captain is very flexible."

"Maker, I have a feeling I know who it is." As if on cue a very scantily clad woman and a white haired elf walked into Aveline's office.

"Avel...what the fuck is he doing here?" Isabela drew her daggers and leered at Sebastian. Kali in turn pulled her sword from it's sheath and put herself between them.

"He is not here to fight Isabela, put those away. Now!"

"Yeah right, he is here trying to find out where they are and you know it. I should have gutted you that day. There is no way I am letting you get anywhere near her or Anders." Fenris gripped his lover's wrists and shook his head.

"This is not the way Isabela." Her eyes burned with hatred, but she nodded. Her daggers finding their resting place on her back. "It is good to see you again my friend."

"He is no friend of ours Fenris." The elf shot her a look and she quieted down again glaring at the floor.

"It has been a long time, I see life is treating you well Fenris."

"It has. I will warn you my friend that if you are here to try to find Hawke I will be forced to fight you and I don't want that."

"I am not here for Hawke. I am here to show Aveline this and to ask for safe passage for Colm." He passed the letter to Fenris and the elf read it intently. "I fear if she comes to Starkhaven and finds Colm there she will have him taken away or worse." Isabela huffed and rolled her eyes.

"Like you care about a mage, come off it Choir Boy." Kali had enough at this point and stepped forward. She pushed Isabela hard and glared at her.

"Sebastian cares very much for my father pirate, never question his compassion in my presence again." Fenris moved quickly and wrapped his arms around Isabela's waist as she lunged at the former Templar. Sebastian did the same to Kali as both women growled at each other. "Let go of me. I want to teach her a lesson."

"I bet you couldn't fight a child with a wooden sword bitch!"

"I'd split you before you got those pig stickers of your off your bloody back!" Kali with all her years of Templar training was much stronger than Sebastian could have imagined. She was easily breaking his grip. If it had not been for Colm stepping in between the two women, Kali would have pummeled the pirate before Fenris was able to let her go.

"Kali enough. This is not the way." She gave her father a harsh look and continued to try to break the prince's hold on her. "Sebastian is a grown man and does not need you to defend him."

"She has no idea Da."

"I know, but beating it into her will not make her see anything different."

"Al...alright, your right Da." Kali sagged in Sebastian's arms and kept her gaze to the floor.

"You will have to forgive my daughter. She has been taught to fight first, sort things out later."

"She sounds like a bloody Templar." Colm chuckled darkly.

"She was one. Never took her vows though, for that I am grateful. Her mother and I were both mages in the Starkhaven Circle. Kali was ripped from our arms right after birth."

"Then how is it you two are together now?" Isabela's voice softened a bit.

"Right before the tower burned down she was sent to finish her training. I saw her in the halls the one day and knew she was mine. She looked just like her mother, but she had my eyes. It took planning, but I was able to talk to her away from the other recruits and convince her I was her father. She didn't believe me at first, but then she met her mother and there was no denying it after that. She was furious that the Chantry lied to her about us. They told her we were dead, killed by mages."

"They told her that?"

"They wanted her to distrust mages, it would make her a better Templar. We were planning on escaping when the fire happened. I was able to find Kali in the confusion, but her mother...she never made it out of the Tower. The Templars had barred the doors, trapping the remaining mages inside."

"I...Maker..."

"You two have been on the run since?"

"Yes, Ser elf we have. I do not want to leave my daughter, but the thought of her having to watch another parent die in front of her is more than I can bare. We are no friends to the Divine and the Chantry's laws where mages are concerned."

"Please don't take this the wrong way, but how do we know you are a mage?" Colm smiled and lite a fireball in his hand. "Good enough for me. We are leaving in two days so meet us here tomorrow night so we can take you to the ship. When you meet us only you can go with us."

"Why?"

"It is for safety. We have other cargo that we must protect. We have to keep our ship's location secret just in case."

"I understand." Kali did not look happy, but she nodded her head to answer also.

"We have a safe house for the three of you to stay the night and say your goodbyes."

"Can you take them there Aveline? We have to go and see Varric."

"Yes, I will see the two of you a little later. Tell Varric what he asked me to do is done and sent."

"Will do." Isabela turned to Sebastian and held out her hand. He timidly took it and was pulled forward a step or two. "I hope that you have given up hunting Anders because I would have to pity you if you make Hawke mad."

"I hold no ill will toward him anymore."

"Good, I would hate to have to kill you Choir Boy."

"You don't know how much I have missed that damned nickname."

"Not as much as we have missed calling you it. It hasn't been the same since...we are all spread out. Only Anders is with her now."

"If you see her...tell her she was right. Someone holds my heart as I hold theirs." Isabela raised her eyebrow and just smiled.

"I'll tell her if I see her. See you tomorrow night Sebastian."

"Till then." Kali laced her hand in his and watched the pirate and elf walk away.

"Can we trust them?"

"Yes, they will make sure Colm is safe."

"I trust your judgment then."

"He will be safe in Ferelden Kali, Hawke will see to that."

"You hold her in high regard."

"The highest." Kali watched a shadow pass over his eyes. Even though she was new to loving someone her woman's intuition told her what she needed to know from his expression.

"You loved her, didn't you?" He had never spoken to Kali about Leigh or his feelings for her. He promised himself that he would tell her at least some of it. He wanted no secrets between them. With a shaky breath he answered her.

"I did, but it was never meant to be. She loved another."

"The mage who blew up the Chantry?"

"Aye, that would be him. Hawke was a dear friend to me and I wasted time being jealous and petty. She use to tell me she wanted me to be happy. I thought I could only be happy with her...I was so terribly wrong."

"How were you wrong?" Sebastian cupped Kali's chin and kissed her softly.

"I am happier now with you in my life."

"I can safely say it is her loss and my gain having you Sebastian."

"No Kali it is my gain. You saved my life in more ways than one. My heart is yours."

"I know, as mine is yours." Sebastian wondered what he had done right in his life to have this woman by his side. He had wanted to send Kali away with her father, but she out right refused. She had told him that if the Divine was hell bent on forcing him to turn on Queen Ashlyn, she would have to get through her first. He loved her ferociousness when it came to defending those she cared for. He was a lucky man indeed. The loss of her father's presence would weigh heavy on her. The prince could see it in her beautiful eyes, but she knew he would be safe. Once they arrived at the safe house Sebastian told her to spend as much time with Colm as she could. Maker only knew if and when they would see each other again. He went to his room and penned a letter to Ashlyn with a smaller note to Leigh in hopes that some strings could be pulled. When he was done he said a prayer hoping he had not killed his friendship with Hawke or her trust. He tucked the letter into a hidden pocket in his vest and went to sleep hoping for peace in the coming days and months.

OoO

_The Fade had become a respite for Leigh since the beginning of the war. Here she could shape things and not have to worry about risking lives. The spirits who had been her childhood playmates made her feel at ease. Anders had even joined her when he could here making this place even more a safe haven. Tonight however she was alone save for Pash who was always by her side. _

"_How do I do this?"_

"_Do what Leigh?"_

"_Meghan, how can I make sure she is safe, how can I raise her and fight a war all at the same time?" Pash smiled and put her hand on her friend's shoulder._

"_You are not alone in this. Anders will teach her how to use her magic in the waking world and we will instruct her here. The same spirits who guarded you are not guarding her as she slumbers. No demon will ever touch her and no mortal will hurt her. She is purity made flesh."_

"_Purity can be sullied Pash. What if I fail? What if this war is lost and mages are hunted down and slaughtered? She will be a victim of it. I have lived experienced almost all I have ever wanted to. Meghan, Karl and Drea are just babies. They have so much to look forward to, so much to live for. It...it breaks my heart to know that if we lose they will..."_

"_Hush, that will not happen. You are a fine leader Leigh, always have been. You lead with compassion and valor. Your friends and loved ones will make sure that the children are safe if the worst should come to pass. Just as mine did for me when I was killed. I left this world knowing that my children would live on, that my blood, my mother's blood would one day bring about a change in the world again."_

"_You never told me you had children."_

"_I...leaving them was the worst pain I had ever experienced. I did not live to see them grow into the fine young man and woman I knew they would become. I would burn a thousand times over just to have stayed and enjoy my family. I always wondered how Justice would have fared against suitors for our daughter."_

"_Just wait about fifteen years and you will see. Anders and he have already agreed our girls will not date if they have anything to say about it."_

"_Forever the protector. He loves all of them like they are his own, just as he loves you."_

"_I am glad they are both free from Vengeance. I don't know what I would have done if..."_

"_You never have to think about that again. We are very lucky women Leigh. Now there is a reason why you are here and I think you should go find him. It has been a while since you both have spoken."_

"_I'm afraid, do I tell him about Meghan...will he hate me for keeping her from him?"_

"_I can't give you an answer to those questions. You will have to figure that out on your own. He is not as blind as he use to be." Leigh sighed and walked away from her spirit friend. She closed her eyes and willed herself to where Sebastian was in the Fade. He appeared to be praying when she found him. She watched him for a while trying to build up the nerve to say something. She had almost given up and walked away when he saw her._

"_Hawke?" _

"_Hello Sebastian."_

"_Is it really you or am I just dreaming?"_

"_It's really me. I hear congratulations are in order. Starkhaven has a good man on the throne."_

"_I am doing my best to help my people. The war took much from them."_

"_War normally does. I know you will do right by your people."_

"_What of your war...is it going...well seems like a horrible word for war?"_

"_It goes. We dealt them a hard blow taking their mages right out from under their noses."_

"_It must have been quite a feat to do so. The Divine is not one to anger lightly."_

"_No she isn't, but I excel at pissing off high and mighty people." A heavy silence filled the air between them. Sebastian finally broke the quiet and stepped closer to her._

"_I have missed you, missed our talks we use to have."_

"_I miss you too. Everyone has left my side save Anders. I see them now and then, but it is not the same. I never thought this would ever leave my mouth, but Maker I miss Kirkwall. I miss the trouble we all use to get into. The nights drinking at the Hanged Man, I even miss my uncle."_

"_We did make it interesting didn't we?"_

"_I wanted to say thank you."_

"_For what?"_

"_Asha told me you have forgiven Anders for what he did."_

"_I can't say forgive, since he did not murder anyone. If you had listened to me...I know you would have never forgiven me when you found out Elthina and the others were still alive. You did the right thing Leigh. I am sorry I asked it of you."_

"_You were in pain Sebastian. She was like a mother to you, I understood."_

"_I need to ask you a few favors if I may?" Leigh crossed her arms over her chest and looked at him with a guarded expression. "I know I have no right to ask anything of you, but I have to try."_

"_I am listening." Her voice was soft and he knew she would listen to him with an open mind. He took a deep breath and began to make his requests._

"_Isabela and Fenris are bringing a mage with them to Ferelden. His name is Colm. He and his daughter were instrumental in helping me take back my throne. I need to know that you will take care of him, keep him safe."_

"_Of course. I will personally escort him to Kinloch Hold."_

"_Kinloch...isn't that the Circle's tower?"_

"_It was, now it is the center of mage learning in Ferelden. Many of the senior enchanters stayed on to help train the next generation of mages. The difference is they don't have Templars leashing them and they can come and go as they please."_

"_I think he would do well there. The second thing I would like to ask is...I am to be married soon and..."_

"_You want Elthina to be the one to marry you."_

"_You always did have a way of reading my mind Leigh. Yes, I would like her to be the one to marry us."_

"_Please tell me this person you are marrying is someone you love."_

"_She is, Kali is...Maker I can't describe the way she makes me feel. I feel like I can do anything when she is by my side." Leigh smiled at the look of admiration on his face. "You were right."_

"_I don't hear that often."_

"_You told me I would find someone who would hold my heart and I have. She is everything I have ever wanted and more."_

"_I hope one day I can meet her. I will see what I can do about getting Elthina to Starkhaven." Leigh was not prepared for him to hug her like he did. His arms wrapped around her and lifted her off the ground. He spun her around then put her down. "I can't promise anything with the Divine breathing down all our necks, but I will think of something. Sebastian there is something I have to tell you and I don't know how to do it..."_

"_We are friends Leigh, you know you can tell me anything."_

"_I'm not so sure, but you deserve to know..." A small bell like laughter filled the air around them. "What in the name of Andraste?" The source of the laughter ran past Leigh and she gasped. The small girl's auburn hair was unkempt and blocking most of her face as she ran from her spirit guardian. Poor Hope could not keep up with the child as she ran circles around her mother and her true father._

"_Are they demons?"_

"_No...the glowing one is a spirit of hope and the other is just a very energetic toddler."_

"_Meghan, please come back here. I can not protect you if you run from me." Leigh ran and scooped her child into her arms. Meghan squirmed a bit till she realized it was her mother. _

"_Mummy, we were playing."_

"_I see that. You know not to run from Hope little one."_

"_I wanted to find you." Sebastian stepped closer more curious than frightened at this point. Meghan caught his movement out of the corner of her eye and she turned her head to get a better look at him. "Hello."_

"_Leigh, this is your daughter?'_

"_Yes, she is a mage hence why she is in the Fade." Sebastian was still in a small state of shock and did not notice the girl's hair color was the same as his own. Her disheveled hair hid most of her face from his view still. _

"_Meghan I would like you meet one of Mummy's friends. This is Prince Sebastian Vael."_

"_Like Dun?"_

"_Yes just like Duncan." The little girl wiped her hair out of her face and gave the prince a sweet smile. Sebastian's eyes went wide seeing her light bronzed skin, her large blue eyes, and he shook his head for a second. When her continence did not change he let out a small cry._

"_She's mine..." _


	44. Chapter 44

Leigh watched Sebastian's face change from shock to pure anger in the blink of an eye. He backed away from her and Meghan. Her daughter squirmed in her arms and began to cry. Strong emotions always made her upset, at least if they were not kind. Hate, anger, and evil thoughts affected her more than any other. Pash had told her it was due to her soul. She was purity personified. Leigh passed the little girl off to Hope and stepped forward toward Sebastian. She had to explain, she had to try to make him understand why she did not tell him. She saw him flinch when she reached for him before he started yelling.

"Get away from me!"

"Sebastian please, let me explain."

"I will hear nothing from you demon. You think showing me this would make me give in?" Leigh gave him a confused look.

"Sebastian I am no demon."

"Liar! You are just like the one who helped Lady Harimann. I will not listen to your kind again." Pash appeared beside her and placed a gentle hand on Leigh's shoulder.

"He thinks you are Allure or a demon like her."

"Wonderful. How to I make him believe it is me?"

"I don't know if you can. Not here at least and it is too dangerous to take your family out of Ferelden to prove it to him. If the Chantry finds you they will kill you and your daughter."

"Maker, what a mess..." She saw Sebastian watching them. His eyes flitted back and forth between the spirits and Leigh. Having never truly been awake in his dreams he was afraid. Meghan twisted herself out of Hope's embrace and ran to him. Her hand glowing white. Leigh know what kind of magic it was. A calming spell to stop his anger, but Sebastian glared at the girl stopping her in her tracks. He took a step forward, but Leigh got to her first seeing Sebastian raise his hands to defend himself. "Stop! She's just a child. You want to fight someone you fight me."

"So be it." He rushed at her. Leigh was able to push Meghan out of the way and take the full force of the blow. She was just thankful he had no weapons, just his fists. It hurt, but it wouldn't kill her, at least not yet. She was so busy ducking his punches that she did not see Meghan run out of the dream. Pash turned to Hope and nodded, The spirit sprinted after the child leaving Pash to watch her friend fight a battle she did not know if she could win.

OoO

Anders and Justice had learned from Leigh and Pash how to be separate in the Fade. Both man and spirit walked next to each other looking for their loved ones in the vast piece of the Fade Leigh had claimed for their own. She had made it look more like Lothering than the strange emptiness the Fade normally had.

"Where could they be?"

"I am not sure Anders." The soft sound of sobs got both their attention and they took off running. Anders saw Hope rocking Meghan in her arms trying to sooth her. "Sister what happened?" Hope looked up and smiled sadly at Justice.

"Meghan wanted to see her mother and broke from my sight. She found her talking to the Prince of Starkhaven. It did not go well."

"Where is she?"

"She is in his dream over there in the mist Justice. Compassion is with her, but..."

"But what?"

"The prince thinks she is a demon and is fighting her." Meghan let out a wail and reached for her father. Anders was torn, he wanted to stay and comfort his daughter, but he also wanted to go defend Leigh.

"I will go and make sure Hawke is safe Anders. Stay with your daughter." Before he could speak Justice was gone.

"He will make sure Hawke is alright."

"I know." he cradled Meghan to him and sat down. His fingers smoothed out her hair and he hummed her favorite lullaby. "It will be alright sweetheart."

"He was mad."

"I know, but it was not at you. You did nothing wrong."

"Why was he mad?"

"He doesn't understand the difference between spirit and demon. Most people can't."

"We can."

"Yes we can. We are lucky to have spirits as friends. The Fade will never be lonely for us." Hope sat next to them and smiled at Meghan.

"You will always have us little one. You are precious to us, just as your parents are."

"See, you will always have friends here."

"Just like Dun."

"Yes, just like Duncan is your friend in the waking world. That man that called you a demon...he can't see what we do Meghan. He can not see the beautiful light that surrounds you. If he could he never would have called you that."

"He said I was his." Anders winced and closed his eyes. He opened them again when he felt small hands touch his face. Blue eyes searched his amber ones and he sighed.

"Your his daughter."

"No I'm yours."

"In my heart you are mine, but..."

"Your my Da. No one else." Anders opened his mouth to speak, but Meghan put her hand over his lips. "No Da I am yours." The hard look she gave him made him laugh. She looked so like her mother at that moment.

"Always sweetheart."

OoO

"You've gotten soft Sebastian." Leigh easily sidestepped his fists and heard him growl.

"I will rip you apart demon!"

"If I were a demon I would not be playing with you like this Sebastian. I would beat you into submission."

"You would be trying to trick me."

"Think what ever you want." Leigh stepped in and gave him a good right cross knocking Sebastian to the ground. "I could kill you with a thought if I so choose. I could control you so easily, but that is not what I want to do. I wanted to talk to you...try to explain why I didn't tell you about Meghan. Please stop fighting me and let's talk."

"No."

"Andraste's Knicker Weasels your such a stubborn ass Sebastian."

"What?"

"It is something Anders says when he is frustrated. It has rubbed off on me." Sebastian thought back and could not remember the mage ever saying that at least in his presence.

"You could be just making that up. Or read my mind for something obscure to snare me with. "

"Why bother, as far as I can see there is nothing but hot air and Chanty bullshit floating in it." He stayed on the ground. The hard look she was giving him he had only seen a few times. The last was when he told her to kill Anders for what he had done. The look make him shiver. Something in him told him this was Hawke and not a demon. The same something told him that girl was his. He sighed and his expression changed to one of defeat. Tired and aggravated Leigh flopped down on the ground a bit away from him and shook her head. "Do you believe me now?"

"I...don't know."

"How can I convince you?"

"I don't think you can."

"No I don't think I can either." Leigh looked over to Pash and the spirit just gave her a sad smile.

"Leigh you can not make him believe. He has never walked the Fade like you have."

"Like you have? Hawke what does she mean?" Leigh lifted her hand and let a small flame flicker to life.

"There are a lot of things you never knew about me. And you wondered why I supported the mages ever chance I got."

"You're not a mage...your a rogue."

"I am both. I had to hide...this from everyone."

"Why?"

"You know why. Meredith would have had me thrown in the Gallows faster than you can say apostate."

"You did not trust me?"

"I couldn't trust anyone. Anders found out by accident as did the others along the way. Fenris didn't find out till after you stormed away."

"Is this the reason you are the leader of the mage rebellion?"

"Yes, but I would have done it even if I wasn't a mage. After what Meredith did...I couldn't let it continue anymore."

"The Divine wants you dead."

"And I want her dead...but not for the reason you think. She is possessed." Sebastian stared into Leigh's eyes. There was no hint of lies in them, but he still wasn't sure any of this was real. "I know you don't believe me, but hopefully one day you will. I...need to leave..."

"Why?"

"I need to find my daughter. She was upset when she left. She can't take strong emotions. Hate and anger being the worst for her."

"I..."

"You didn't know and it is my fault for never telling you about her."

"Wait, when you were last here you said you were carrying twins is the other mine also?"

"No, her brother is Anders, blonde hair, amber eyes and all. I don't know why the Maker wanted me to have...she is very special Sebastian."

"And Anders...?"

"Loves her dearly. He has taken it upon himself to train her, protect her." Another flash of anger panged through him. Sebastian grit his teeth and growled at her

"It should be me, not him."

"I know, but you can't understand what it is to be a mage, but we do. She needs to be kept safe until she can defend herself against Templar and demons alike."

"So I will never know her." Leigh felt her heart break seeing the pain she was causing him. It was not fair and she knew it, but she could see no other way to protect her children.

"I wouldn't say that." Both rogues jumped at the sound of Anders' voice. Leigh looked over and saw Justice had joined Pash she just did not know when. Her focus had been so intense on Sebastian she let her guard down to her surroundings. "Meghan wanted to come back and make sure you both weren't hurt." Sebastian jumped to his feet and narrowed his eyes at the blonde man. He opened his mouth to speak, but the small bell like voice stopped him.

"Don't fight." Seeing her head laying on Anders shoulder and her little fingers grasping at his shirt made Sebastian ache inside. He could see that his daughter loved Anders. He was her father in everything but blood.

"We won't sweetheart. Right?"

"Yes." Meghan wriggled out of Anders arms and ran to her mother making sure she was okay.

"Mummy..."

"I'm fine little one. He and I were just discussing something."

"He called you a demon..."

"He did not mean it." Meghan nodded and turned back to Sebastian. She stepped a bit closer, but kept her distance.

"Princes aren't suppose to be mean. You were mean."

"I was upset and I said things I did not mean. I am truly sorry Meghan." She gave him a small smile and went to play with Pash and Justice. "She isn't afraid of them?"

"No they're her friends and guardians here. Justice you know..."

"That is the spirit that was in Anders?"

"Still in thank you, but here we are separate."

"Hawke...what I am to make of all of this? I don't understand."

"I know and I wish I could help you understand it, but I can't. I have to protect my children, my fellow mages and my country. I can't...I can't tell you everything. It is too dangerous, for us, for you. The Divine is scared and she is trying everything she can to get to me and end me. She'll even try to use you if she can."

"I won't let that happen. Starkhaven is staying out of this war."

"I hope so. I don't wish this on anyone." The sound of Meghan laughing made the three adults turn around. The sight that greeted them was one none of them ever thought they would see. Justice was spinning Meghan around and the little girl was shrieking in delight. Even Justice was grinning from ear to ear at the bell like laughter coming from the girl. Pash walked over to the three and shook her head smiling.

"I never thought I would ever see him like this again."

"He has changed a lot since Kirkwall. He is much more human." Leigh patted her husband's arm.

"I think Anders has been rubbing off on him." Even Sebastian let out a laugh seeing the spirit playing with his daughter. His eyes met Leigh's and he sighed.

"I can never be part of her life can I?"

"I don't see a way right now Sebastian. It is too dangerous to take her out of Ferelden. I..." Anders stared at the ground rubbing his chin, thinking.

"There might be a way, but we would all have to agree to it."

"How love?"

"He sees her here in the Fade. She can get to know him and start to understand everything. The only problem is if you are not around getting him here. I don't have your powers of entering others dreams Leigh. It could take me forever to find him." Sebastian quirked his head to the side and raised a eyebrow at Leigh.

"You can enter others dreams?"

"I can, but it is not something I like to do. I am what is known as a dreamer, a mage that can control the Fade and those in it."

"Maker...just like that boy, the half Dalish."

"Yes, see why I hid it."

"I do." His eyes fell back on Meghan who was now playing with Hope making different spells in her tiny hands. Before he realizes it his feet had carried him over to her and he knelt down beside them. Leigh and Anders followed and took their places next to him.

"Meghan sweetie, would you like to have Sebastian come back and see you again?"

"Yes, but he has to be nice." Sebastian held up his hand over his heart and made his face serious.

"I swear Meghan I will behave myself from now on."

"Good." She went back to her play with Hope for a moment then turned to him giggling. "Can you do this?" She cupped her hand and made a small ball of light. It rose off her palm and floated around him.

"No, I'm afraid I do not have magic like you and your mother."

"What can you do?"

"Sebastian is and archer Meghan."

"Archer?"

"He uses a bow and arrows like your Uncle Nate."

"I want to do that too."

"Perhaps I can teach you when I come back to see you."

"Mummy can I?"

"I don't see why not. It is good to learn a different skill." Meghan squealed in excitement and hugged her mother's leg before running off to play again. "She hasn't been that excited in a long time."

"She seems very happy."

"She is such a bright light Sebastian. She doesn't have a mean bone in her body. She sees the world with such wonder it is humbling. Elthina said she is a lot like you in many ways."

"She knows?"

"Yes, she does."

"Maker, she must be so disappointed in me."

"She's not. Trust me she's not. If anything she was happy. Meghan loves sitting with her when she reads the Chant." Sebastian smiled picturing his daughter sitting next to the Grand Cleric listening intently like he had done years ago. He felt a small hand touch his and he looked down. Meghan began pulling him away from her mother.

"I want to show you something." He nodded and followed the girl. Anders slipped next to his wife and wrapped his arms around her.

"Well this went better than I ever expected."

"I...Maker, it is like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders."

"After seeing her I think he understands Leigh."

"I have agonized over how to tell him for three years."

"I know love. I have spent those years worrying he would take her away from us if he ever found out, but now...now I don't think he will."

"I wish he could see her. I mean really see her in the flesh. I want so much for this war to be over."

"It will be Leigh, it is just going to take time to..."

"I know and this is what I was born to do right?"

"No, you were born to live, this was something I know you did not want. We will end this Leigh and I will be by your side through out all of it."

"You have no idea how happy that makes me. The thought of winning this and you not being there to see it..."

"That still might happen, but it won't be because of the Blight."

"Pash and I will have to think of a way to bring him here when I am not able to."

"I am sure you both will figure it out. You figured out how to make Justice and I separate here, it should not be too hard."

"Difference is your a mage and use to all this. It is easier when the person has mana in their blood."

"We'll figure it out." They watched Meghan play with her father long into the dawn. When Sebastian began to fade Leigh knew that he was waking. She held him there long enough to converse about their next meeting here in the Fade. It would be the beginning of many visits to the Fade for the prince. He did not know who to tell Kali about all this, but he knew he had to before they could share their life together. He wanted no secrets between them.

OoO

Kali shook him violently trying to wake him up. Her father stood behind her trying to clam her down. She had come into Sebastian's room over an hour ago and could not wake the man she loves. Fenris and Isabela came looking for them when they did not show up to the meeting place. The elf could feel the magic holding the prince, but kept silent.

"He won't wake." Colm tried to comfort his daughter, but she shook him off. "Why won't he wake?"

"Something in the Fade is holding him there."

"A demon?"

"Most likely. The Veil is thin here."

"We have to do something..." Kali let out a mournful sob and laid her head on Sebastian's chest. Colm let out a gasp when he saw the prince's hand move to touch his daughter and had to be restrained by Fenris. The elf pulled him back and whispered in his ear.

"He's not possessed." Colm looked at Fenris like he was mad. "Look." Sebastian's eyes fluttered open right when his hand landed on Kali's back. He heard her sobbing and tried to sit up.

"Kali? What's wrong?"

"Sebastian..."

"Why are you crying?" He sat up straight and a dreadful thought hit him. "Is Colm alright?"

"I am fine Sebastian. She was worried about you. We have been trying to wake you for over an hour now."

"I...I was talking to a friend." Colm raised an eyebrow and pulled his daughter up away from Sebastian. "It wasn't a demon Colm, it was a mage."

"Most people are not awake enough to talk to another person in the Fade. Unless you are a mage yourself, it was a demon infecting your dream."

"No, Hawke is no demon."

"Hawke talked to you in the Fade?"

"Yes Isabela. She had that boy help her enter my dreams. Asha was able to get word to her about Colm and other things. She wanted to talk to me."

"Why?"

"That...I would rather not say just yet. I need to talk to Kali privately first."

"Over my dead body. You could be controlled by a demon...I will not leave her in here with you alone."

"Fine. Could you two give us a few minutes?"

"Sure, We will be back in two hours I have to go get other cargo for our journey." Sebastian nodded and waited til both Isabela and Fenris were gone. Inside he already knew that they had seen Meghan and knew she was his, but he did not need them adding to the conversation. Kali took his hands and stared at him with a mix of fear and love in her eyes. He gave her a weak smile and sighed.

"I have something to tell you and I want it to come from me before...before you choose to spend your life with me."

"You can tell me anything you know that." He nodded and laid out everything. He told her about his love for Leigh and what happened between them. It killed him to see the hurt on her face, but she said nothing and her hands stayed in his. He told her about why he did not wake and she tightened her grip on his hands.

"So you have a child?"

"Yes."

"And Hawke never told you?"

"No, but I understand why. I threatened to kill her and Anders. She was protecting her family."

"It still does not give her the right to keep you from your daughter! How can she be so cruel?"

"She wasn't being cruel. She was afraid I would take Meghan away from her. Give her to the Chantry because the child is a mage."

"How can they know she is a mage. Our magic does not manifest itself til we are almost adolescence."

"She is a Somniari Colm, a dreamer...just like her mother."

"Impossible...dreamers are myths."

"Rare, but not myths. I met one in my adventures with Hawke. The boy was powerful."

"You said Hawke is also a dreamer?"

"Yes."

"Maker then what I overheard in the Tower was true."

"What did you hear Da?"

"Your mother said she had a dream about a woman that would set us all free. She would be the strongest mage to be born in over a millennium. I thought it was wishful thinking, but if...if this Hawke is she then...Maker we have a chance. Things could really change."

"That is her hope Colm. She is fighting so that no one will have to go through what you and Kali had to endure. Children will not be ripped from their parents' arms anymore by the Chantry. I know why you are angry Kali for her hiding Meghan from me. I know how you feel about what the Chantry did to you, to your parents. Hawke is not like that. She wanted to tell me, wanted me to be a part of Meghan's life."

"So where does that leave us Sebastian?"

"What do you mean?"

"You have a child with a woman you love, why would you need me?"

"I did love her, but she did not love me back in the same way. She has a husband and I have you. I love you more than I ever thought possible. I don't want to be with Hawke, Kali. I want you in my life, but I could not go through with marrying you without you knowing the truth. I did not want you to find out one day and hate me for not telling you. I want you to know everything. It is the only way we can..." Kali smiled and wrapped her arms around his waist.

"Truly trust one another. I do trust you. You are risking so much to get my father out of here. I know you love me Sebastian. I was just worried you would run off and..."

"No, never. I want to see my daughter in the flesh, but I will never leave you behind to do so. If we try to go to her now the Divine might think we are aiding Ferelden and march on Starkhaven. I have to bide my time."

"But you do want to see her?"

"Yes, I do. I thought...I never thought of having children til I met you Kali. I...did not want this, but I will not turn my back on my child."

"I wouldn't want you to. We will face this...together."

"You are a wonder Kali. The Maker blessed me when you came into my life."

**Not really sure how I feel about this chapter. I have been on the fence with it for over a week now and if I don't call it done I will go insane. As always I want to thank all of you that are reading and reviewing. I also want to apologize for not updating as often as I use to. Life is crazy right now. All your support keeps me going. **

**Raven**


	45. Chapter 45

Anders had his hand against Leigh's stomach holding her against the wall they were hiding behind. At least the shadows hid their presence from prying eyes. He cursed himself for letting her talk him into bringing Elthina here for Sebastian. He knew it would be a dangerous gamble, but both of them agreed they owed the prince something after all that had happened. Now he would give anything to be back in Ferelden again. As soon as they got to Starkhaven Templars began dogging them at ever turn. If it hadn't been for Leigh's quick thinking both of them would be dead. Sebastian and his bride to be were able to get Ethlina into hiding with little trouble, but the two mages were not as lucky. Leigh they could not find, but Anders, they could feel his presence quite quickly. He had begged her to run, but Leigh would never leave his side. He knew it as much as it pained him, she would rather die beside him than live without him. At least he knew his children were safe in Ferelden. His eyes met his wife's and she nodded. In a flash both moved from their hiding spot and ran. They had to get out of the city. It was the only way they would survive. If they could make it to Kirkwall, they knew they had a fighting chance of getting back home alive.

Leigh could feel the Templars closing in on them and she cursed loudly in her head. There were too many to fight off, even with her power. They would overwhelm them too quickly. She never should have brought Anders with her. Alone she would have been fine. Her talent for remaining unseen would have kept her safe, but some how, some way they were able to track Anders. The only thing she could think of was the large pool of blood he left behind years ago when Meredith ran him through. They made a new phylactery from that blood and were able to track him. It seemed to her that they changed their armor over the past three years. Instead of the flaming sword, now they had the horrid red sun blazed on their chests. It made her think of poor Karl Thekla and her guts twisted into knots. She heard the telltale sign of sword being unsheathed and she pulled a few flasks out of her pack. One a miasma grenade and the other a flask of lamp oil. She threw the miasma first to block their sight and sting their eyes. Next the threw the oil and watched as Anders sent a fire ball from his finger tips at it. She heard screams as the first few Templars ran head long into the flames. It was enough of a distraction for them to slip away into the darkness and out into the countryside.

"Well that was bracing? What now?"

"We make our way to Kirkwall."

"If they don't bloody find us first. Leigh..."

"No Anders, we are not splitting up for you to draw them off. I will burn the world before I let those bastards lay a hand on you."

"They can find me, but they can't find you. I will only bring them down on us." Leigh leaned against a tree with her arms crossed. Her face was a mask of annoyance. Anders stood his ground and kept her gaze. "You know I'm right Dove. Please..."

"No." Her voice was a whisper and she shook her head violently. "I let them take you from me before...I won't let that happen again." Her skin broke and the red glow started showing through. "We will not lose both of you again." Anders sighed and stepped closer taking her hands in his.

"Alright love, we go together." She turned her head up to him and gave a sad smile.

"Always together."

OoO

"Do you think they made it out of the city?" Sebastian turned around from the window he was looking out of to face his wife. His expression was one of grave concern and guilt.

"I hope so. Hawke is tricky, she can wiggle her way out of almost anything."

"But can she get them both out of this? We should have never let them run like that. We should have hid them here."

"Hawke did not want to put us in danger. At least we can keep Elthina safe for now." A soft knock at the door made Sebastian tense. He waved to Kali to get away as he went to answer it. One of the their stewards was standing there with wide eyes. "What is it Gavin?"

"There...there is a woman here to see you, Your Majesty."

"Who is she?"

"Says her name is Cassandra Pentaghast. She said she is a Seeker." Sebastian froze. He knew the Seekers were the ones the Chantry sent when they were looking for enemies of the Chantry. Cassandra happened to be very good at her job.

"Escort her to throne room I will meet with her there." Kali stepped beside him and squeezed his hand.

"Do you want me to come down with you?"

"No, stay here. Make Sure Her Grace is comfortable."

"Alright, but if you need me please have one of the guards come get me."

"I will." He gave his bride to be a soft sweet kiss then left the room. He found the Seeker standing in front of a painting of his grandfather. "How may I help you Seeker?" The young woman turned around and bowed to the prince.

"I came to explain why we are here is Starkhaven Your Majesty. I did not want you to think we are here to usurper your rule."

"I would hope not. I had a long rode to get Starkhaven back from my cousin."

"So I have heard." He motioned for her to sit before taking a seat across from her. "We are here trying to find Serah Hawke. You were one of her companions during her time in Kirkwall, but I heard rumor you left her side after what happened to the Chantry."

"I did for reasons that are my own."

"She refused to kill the man responsible for killing all of the innocents. You being a brother of the faith...it must have been horrible to be the only one to survive."

"It still is. Hawke was a friend and her betrayal hurt."

"Was a friend?"

"I vowed to find the man she spared and bring him to justice. I have since heard he was dead. Killed defending the mages at the Gallows."

"He is not dead. He is here in Starkhaven. We have a phylactery of his blood and traced him here. We think Hawke is with him."

"If they are here I have not seen them."

"We are hoping you would help us track them down."

"Why?"

"This war is tearing Thedas apart and we want her to help us stop it. The mages will listen to her. They respect her, she has become the symbol of hope for them even though she is not a mage herself. I tried to understand why she is so important to them. I interrogated her friend Varric."

"Varric?"

"He was no very helpful, but he did give me some insight on the Champion."

"That being?"

"She is a leader, a saint as well as a sinner. Her methods are inspiring."

"It sounds like you respect her."

"She rose from nothing. A dirt poor refugee, mercenary, noble and now leader of a Revolution. Her life is shadowing that of our blessed Andraste. If it wasn't for the fact Hawke was against the Chantry she would give the Divine a run for her sovereigns."

"She was quite a leader when I knew her, but now..."

"Now she is the enemy."

"Your word not mine. If they were here I would have found them and took my revenge for what Anders did, that is if he was still alive. I doubt he is. I saw the pool of blood Seeker. No one could have survived that, not even him."

"Maybe the demon inside him is not controlling his body."

"Maybe."

"If you hear or see anything..."

"I will contact the Chantry, but I doubt you will find her. She is good at hiding."

"We shall see. Thank you for your time Your Majesty. We will be in touch." Sebastian watched the Seeker leave his throne room and finally let out the breath he had been holding. He was good at hiding his feelings by keeping a bland expression on his face. It was something he had kept from his rake days. It had served him well tonight with the Seeker, at least he hoped it did. He waited til he knew she was out of the castle before returning to Kali.

"What did they want?"

"They wanted me to help them hunt down Hawke."

"So now the Seekers are after her? Maker what a mess. They won't stop till they find her Sebastian. Seekers...they are not to be messed with."

"I know." He rubbed his forehead out of frustration and sat down on their bed. "This is my fault for asking them to come here. If anything happens to them...Maker please watch over them and get them back home to their children."

"From your lips to his ears child." Sebastian smiled hearing Elthina's voice.

"I'm sorry I was not able to properly greet you earlier Your Grace, but I was afraid if they found you..."

"I understand my dear boy. It is so good to see you again." The Grand Cleric embrace him tightly. "Hawke knew the risks coming here, but she wanted to honor her promise to you."

"As glad as I am to see you, I wish that she had not. If they catch them both..."

"I doubt they will and if they do I pity the one who do. I have seen the magic she can call forth, it is shocking and awe inspiring at the same time."

"I never knew she was a mage till just recently. How did she hide it for so long?"

I spirit bound her magic in the waking world, but she still had them in the Fade. This same spirit guarded her while she learned to use her spells in the Fade. Now the spirit shares her body further helping her in the war."

"She's possessed?"

"For any other mage I would say yes, but not Hawke."

"So she thought it would be good to become like Anders? Is she mad?"

"The spirit joined with her to save her life Sebastian. She would have died otherwise against the Arishok."

"Wait...what?"

"She was stabbed by the Qunari right through her stomach. She was bleeding to death. The spirit did not want her to die so she joined with her and healed her."

"I knew she had been injured, but she never told me it was that dire."

"She did not want to worry any of those who had not witnessed the fight or the aftermath of it." Sebastian started to understand why she had pushed him away so much after the Qunari incident.

"That's why she kept me at arms length. She feared I would...she did not trust me not to turn her into the Templars."

"She trusted you Sebastian, she still does. Hawke just did not want you to feel torn between your duty and your friendship with her. She cared for you too much to hurt you more than she already had."

"What kind of spirit is it? Is it another Justice or something else?"

"Compassion." Sebastian smiled and shook his head.

"That would be the one would it not? She is the most compassionate person I have ever met. Next to Kali of course." His bride to be blushed and swatted his arm.

"There is more you need to know, but it would be easier for you to read it than have me tell it to you." Elthina pulled a set of scrolls out of her pack and handed them over to Sebastian. He opened them up and started to read. His eyes went wide and he looked up at his mentor.

"What is this?"

"It is the account of Andraste's children and what happened to them. Things are not the way she intended them to be. I did not believe it myself at first, but many things in those scrolls ring true."

"Andraste had not children."

"Yes she did, but they were left out of the legend to further sanctify her. Read it and let me know what you think. I will retire for the evening."

"I will show you to your room Your Grace." Kali rose from her place next to Sebastian and went to lead the older woman to her sleeping chambers.

"Thank you kindly child." Sebastian did not even know they had left him he was so engrossed in the scroll that time seemed to have no meaning. None of this was what he had expected. The further he read the more he understood that the Chantry had lied about. His guts turned at some of the passages, but he kept reading well into the early morning. He needed to understand everything.

**I want to say hi to all my readers and thank you for your support of me and this story. I know I have seriously slowed down on posting, but I will finish this story and the other two I am writing I promise. Real life and other issues have slowed me. The next few chapters are going to go back in time and focus on Justice and Pash. Again thank you all for reading and reviewing. **

**Raven **


	46. Chapter 46

Sebastian read on from the scrolls that Elthina had handed him. He had to stop a few times to let the emotions that the words brought out quiet. He found that almost everything he had been taught in his years with the Chantry were half truths and blatant lies. Kali had gone to bed hours ago after she had read the first scroll. She seemed shaken by the account of Andraste's death. The first scrolls had been written by Maferath himself and his betrayal of the woman he loved.

_**Mercy and Courage Scroll 1.**_

_I watched from afar as they set up the burning pits. The Archon Hessarian and his wife had promised my daughters would not share their mother's fate, but I have yet yo see them. I watch them bring out the lesser leaders of our little rebellion. Most had been beaten badly and for the first time since I betrayed them I feel a pang of remorse. The last to come out was my bride, followed by my daughters. Drea was barely walking, while Mercy's head was held high, helping her sister stay on her feet. Drea was the stronger of the two in a fight, but Mercy, my sweet confident Mercy. She was strong in spirit like her mother. Both of my girls could handle a sword and shield. I should not call them them mine, I have a sneaking feeling they are not mine, but the Maker's. It would fit with all the high and mighty things Andraste had been spouting. She was his chosen, his bride to be when her life ended. Let us see if he loves her enough to save her from the flame._

_Her generals were put to the flame first so she could hear their screams and smell their burning flesh. I moved closer to see the look on her face and found it was placid. Even through the heavy smoke and flying embers she looked ever the warrior. She was looking to the sky and her lips were moving. The girls were huddled together and Mercy was still staring at the pyres with a look of defiance in her eyes. She held her sister's hand trying to give her strength. It hurt to see them like this, two girls who had not yet seen ten springs. At last it came time to put Andraste to the flames, and my stomach turned. I could not watch this, but something made me stay. I could only guess later that it was my punishment from the Maker for what I had done. The Archon stepped forward, holding on to a torch, his face was solemn, but his wife's was almost happy. The woman had waited a long time for this._

"_For your treason against the Imperium you are to be put to the flame." Andraste leveled her gaze at the man and smiled. Proud and fearless to the end._

"_Magic is to help man and never to rule over him. Remember that those touched by his grace will always find peace even in death. I go to the Maker's side and I have no regrets. All this proves is that your rule no longer has the strength it use to. It took the betrayal of my husband for you to catch me, I wonder if you could have done that without his help?"_

"_Burn her now and silence her wicked tongue. It ends here." The Archon nodded to his wife and set the kindling on fire under Andraste's feet. The fire did not take long to spread and the most ear piercing scream came from the Maker's chosen. She writhed as the flames licked her body. Drea screamed and tried to run to help her mother, but the soldiers stopped her and shoved her to the ground. Mercy watched with tears streaming from her eyes, but she did not look away. Her mother's screams became deafening and it was only then that she began to speak. Her voice was steady, but harsh. I will never forget it._

"_End it now. Give her mercy."_

"_Mercy? She deserves this. How many of our people did hers kill?" Mercy turned and faced the Lady Vasilia, her face still placid, yet her eyes were burning with rage._

"_How many people have died serving the Imperium? How many under your rule? All we wanted was freedom and you denied it. No, end this or so help me I will end you."_

"_You threaten me litt..." The woman's words were cut off as her body was lifted from the ground. Two ghostly hands held her aloft and looked like they could rip her in two with little trouble. I noticed Mercy's hands were aglow. It was then I knew she was his daughter, not mine. Her eyes began to glow a brilliant white as magic surged around her. Mercy turned to Hessarian who looked at a lose._

"_End it now!" The soldiers that had been standing watch ran at the girl, but no sooner had they moved than they were blasted back again. I could see Drea's face and the horror etched on it watching her twin wield such power. It was this kind of power we had been fighting all these years and yet here was the daughter of the great Andraste using the accursed magic. The air cracked around all of us as the sky seemed to darken. "Last chance, end it or I end her." Mercy twisted her hands and the ghost hands moved pulling the helpless woman's arms taunt. Lady Vasilia screamed in pain and fear. Hessarian seemed torn, did he give mercy to the woman who threatened his rule and save his wife, or did he let his wife die to satisfy his people? His love for his wife won out in the end._

"_Enough_ _, release her...I will grant your mother mercy."_

"_Give my mother peace first and you shall have you wife back in one piece." The Archon drew his sword and pierced Andraste's heart granting her peace. Mercy true to her word let the woman go, but the damage had been done. When Mercy went to her sister to help her from the ground Drea screamed and scrambled away from her._

"_Get away from me you...you demon!"_

"_I am no demon. I could not sit by while our mother suffered. Drea please, I am your sister. You know me."_

"_You are like them. Another power hungry mage. You are everything our mother fought against. Don't touch me!" Mercy dropped her hand and bowed her head in defeat. No words she could say would change her sister's mind. I watched Drea run from the courtyard and disappear in the crowd. The people of Tevinter let the girl go afraid to cross the sister that remained. Mercy walked back the pyre that held her mother's now burnt body and fell to her knees. She pulled the sword that was still in the blackened body out and held it in her hands. None of the Tevinters tried to capture her or tried to go after the girl who ran away. The Archon and his people left before Mercy decided to turn her magic back on them and I also left not wanting her to see me. I am not sure what happened to her or to Drea. I just know there will never forgiveness for me. I betrayed my family, my people and I will rot in the Void for it. I will live the rest of my days with the sounds of my wife's screams echoing in my head. I deserve a worse punishment than this, but who is to say that it will not come later. If there is justice in this world, it will come at my daughters' hands. _

_**Journey of the Ashes Scroll 2.**_

_**Written by: Disciple Harvard **_

_I found her kneeling in front of our Lady Andraste's pyre. A young girl barely out of her childhood. I approached softly as not to scare her, but my footsteps were heard and she drew the sword that had been sitting on her lap like a seasoned warrior. I knew who she was, even with the soot stained face and clothing. Her eyes had a feral look to them and she snarled at me. I put my hands in the air and slowly knelt down away from her. _

"_Mercy, do you not remember me?"_

"_Harvard?"_

"_Yes little one. I came to retrieve your mother's ashes so the Tevinters can not defile them. I want to take them somewhere safe."_

"_What does it matter she is gone?"_

"_She deserves to be honored and revered."_

"_Then take them, but the sword is mine."_

"_As you wish. I will gather her ashes and take them and you to the faithful. Where is your sister?"_

"_She...she ran. I do not know where she went nor do I care." I could only nod as I collected the ashes of our fallen leader. Mercy did not move, her face was a mask of pain and rage. Having seen the two girls grow up at their mother's side I could tell that Mercy would be the one who take up the mantle should Andraste fall. She was always the strongest of the two. Drea though a strong warrior was not made to lead like her sister._

"_It is time to leave Mercy." She followed, but did not speak. We made our journey with others back to the land of our Lady's birth. There in the highest mountains did we place her remains. It took years, but we finally finished her final resting place. In those years Mercy remained with us, but at a distance. She read her mother's writings and poured over them alone. She would disappear for days at a time and walk the mountain side. Most of us kept our distance and let her grieve. I knew she was not over the lose of her family. Her mother gone, her father a betrayer and her sister lost to us. All of us who had followed her mother into the Void and back felt a certain sense of responsibility in making sure that she was safe. We lived apart from the rest of Thedas and remained faithful to the teachings of Andraste. Every few months some of our people went to trade furs and other wares for supplies to last the harsh winters we had come to endure on the mountain. We named our new home Haven, a place of peace and faith. _

_Over the years I watched Mercy grow in beauty that surpassed her mother. Her voice was that of an angel when she sings the Chant, but she was still aloof. She spoke to all of us, but was not close to anyone. My fear is she learned of betrayal so young that she was guarding herself from further pain. It was sad for us to see her so surrounded by people who loved her and she seemed so alone. She was a grown woman now, strong, wise and every bit the warrior her mother was. When the news of the Chantry reached us through our trades it did not surprise her at all. We were not the only survivors of the war with Tevinter. Many different sects broke off and scattered after our Lady was taken from us. This Chantry claimed to follow her teachings to the letter, but the more we heard the more we knew it was not true. It was said that all mages were to be locked away from the general populous to keep the world safe from their curse. Having scribed many of Andraste's sermons I know this was false. She never wanted anyone to know the bonds of slavery and imprisonment again under false rulers. We were all to be equal, men, women, elven, and human. We are all the Maker's children. I fear what this tide will bring in. Mercy is aware of it all, but still she stays silent. Even the rumors that her sister had become a Templar, a mage hunter have not broken through her stoic resolve. I pray to the Maker that the rumors are false, for I fear what will happen should the women one day meet on the field of battle._

_**Mercy and Courage Scroll 3.**_

_**Written by Mercy.**_

_I have been asked many times by my mother's disciples why I have not tried to finish what she started all those years ago. I have no answer to give them save it is not my battle to fight. I am not my mother and never will be. I am a mage and from what I have been hearing in most of Thedas I am not to be trusted. We are dangerous, evil, the Maker's curse on mankind for their sins. No matter how many people our magic heals, or how many battles we help win, we will never been seen as anything but a weapon. A weapon with a soul and a mind of our own. Unlike a sword who needs a warrior to wield it, a mage just needs mana to fuel them. Some of us don't even need that, at least I know I don't. My connection to the Fade is as strong as my connection to the waking world. I feel a home in both places and it is true I prefer to stay in the Fade. At least there I don't have to hide, I don't have to face the fact I am alone. My family is gone. My mother is dead, taken from me by narrow minded mages who thought they were Gods. My father betrayed her out of spite and jealousy of a being who has never shown himself to his people. My sister hates me, fears me for what I am. She even went as far as becoming the first of these Templars that are to hunt mages down and collar us._

_Drea. My twin, the other half of me, her absence hurts the worst of them all. We always promised that we would fight back to back against everything. Be there for the other when we were weak. I guess promises mean nothing in this world. Blood means nothing. The people who have protected me to this point see me as aloof, stoic, and maybe a bit unfeeling. How can I tell them that I have no heart left to care? How to I guide them when I myself have no faith? The Maker turned his back on us, he let my mother burn, a woman it is claimed that he loved and wanted for his bride. When I was younger I was in awe of his presence through my mother's words and songs, now I would spit in his face if he appeared to me. It scares me that I know hate of this kind, that I have fallen so far and yet I have never acted on my hate. I have never once harmed a person with my magic or with a weapon really, not since the Exalted March. I have no stomach for it anymore. I know the time is coming for me to face this new Chantry. I need to see it for my own eyes, but first I must find my father. I have received word he is here in the Wild Lands. He is hiding they say, though I can't guess from what or who. I mean the man no harm. He will be judged if the words of my mother are true. He will know justice before the end._

_**OoO**_

_I went alone to face my father at the very heated protests of the faithful. I needed to know why he did it without some overzealous person try to kill him out of some idea of vengeance for my mother. I traveled at night mostly heading toward a small farm town on the edge of the Wilds just north of the old Fort Ostagar. The mage hunters were out in force along the roads looking for apostates, that is what they call us now. Illegal mages that live free. It is strange to see how much has changed in the twelve years since her death. Once mages ruled over everything and now we are the slaves, the hated. I am one of the lucky ones who can defend themselves from Templar abilities. Even if they drain me of my magic they have to contend with my blade. _

_When I arrived at the village I was surprised to see a group of Templars were accosting a man in the middle of the square. From my vantage point I could see the man was no mage. He wore heavy armor that had seen better days and a greatsword had been strapped to his back before they stripped him of it. His hair was matted and encrusted with leaves. I crept closer and nearly bolted into the clear when I saw the man's face. It was the great Maferath, my father. It broke my heart to see the once great man he was so broken, so lost. It was then I heard a voice I never thought I would hear again._

"_Did you think I would not find you? Did you think that I would let you go after what you did to my mother?" Drea's voice had changed with age and was filled with anger, but I would know it anywhere. She removed her helmet and stared down at the broken man. Her visage was hard as stone. Gone was the girl that was full of life, now it seemed anger was all there was inside her. She handed her helmet off to one of her men and reached down to pull our father up by his matted hair. "You will answer to the Divine for your sins."_

"_The only person who I have to answer to Drea is Andraste. It does not matter what you or this Divine do to me. My damnation or salvation is in the Maker's hands."_

"_I will see you suffer as my mother suffered!" I saw Drea pull her arm back and hit our father full force in the stomach with her armored hand. She continued to strike him till I stepped in. The Templars did not know what hit them as I used a spell that made them crash to the ground. I ran as fast as I could and pulled my father to his feet making him run with me. I sent a firestorm to form between us and the Templars. I heard Drea growl, but they could not get past the flames. We ran til he could no longer keep up with my pace. Once I was sure we had not been followed I set camp and went about healing his wounds._

"_Who are you?"_

"_I am someone who does not like seeing people hurt no matter their crimes."_

"_Your a mage."_

"_Yes, hence the healing I am doing. Do you hate mages too?"_

"_I...I did."_

"_What changed your mind?"_

"_My oldest daughter, she is a mage."_

"_Where is she now? Did they force her into the Circles they have been making around Thedas?"_

"_I don't know, I hope she is safe. I was a fool for what I did. I do not deserve your kindness child, nor do I deserve to continue breathing. I betrayed my family out of jealousy and a lust for power. Now I am alone and if I die no one will care."_

"_I would not say that. I would care if you die. I would mourn you."_

"_You don't even know me child. I am a monster, a murderer. I gave the Tevinters the purest, most noble person I have even known. I knew full well what they intended to do to her and I let them. You should not show me kindness."_

"_It is said we as man are weak when we let envy and pride eat at our hearts, but if we ask for forgiveness and strive to change the Maker will show us his grace."_

"_You speak like Andraste."_

"_I should, I learned at her knee since I was a babe." It was then I pulled my hood back and looked my broken father in the eye. I saw the sorrow and pain swimming in his gaze. He began to sob and I wrapped my arms around him. For so long I wanted to hate him, to be like my sister and make him suffer for his sins, but faced with the sight of him now I could see he was paying for it now. "I forgive you father." The words flowed out of my lips before I was aware I was saying them._

"_Mercy..."_

"_Yes father. I had to come find you. I had to face what happened before it ate me alive like it did Drea."_

"_She hates me, wants me dead."_

"_She is angry and lost. One day she will be able to move past all this, but she will have to do it in her own time. This Chantry they formed has poisoned her mind. It has fed into her rage and made her turn against what mother wanted. They twisted her words to use for their own fruition. I would take you to were I have been hiding, but there is too many of the faithful there. They would attack you and I am not sure even I could protect you from them."_

"_I would never ask you to protect me. It is enough to hear they you forgive me."_

"_I want to make sure you stay safe."_

"_I am old child. I am being hunted by not only the Chantry and the other faithful, but also your sister and my older sons. You are not safe being near me."_

"_I can handle myself father, you taught me that. I will help find a place for you to live in peace." To his credit he did not try to argue with me after that. I am not sure if it was from exhaustion or the fact he was very happy to have at least my forgiveness. I let him rest and kept watch through the night. Before dawn I woke him so we could move before the Templars could find us. For a month we wandered staying hidden from Templars that seemed to show up out of the blue. I will give my sister this, she does not give up easily. It would come time soon for me to show her that neither do I. _

_**OoO**_

_It finally happened near the place known as the Blooded Cliffs the east of the Frostback Mountains. Drea and the few men she had left found us as we made camp. Her Templars looked as if they had taken on a dragon and lost. Drea herself was not much fitter then her men. Her armor was in tatters and I could see dried blood from a large gash on her face. Their condition gave me hope I could talk them down from a fight, but only a slim hope. I knew my sister too well to think she would give up easily. She had no idea it was her twin she hunted, not that it would have mattered to her. I was thankful that my cloak and hood were covering my face at the moment she spoke or she would have seen the amusement on my face._

"_Surrender now and I will see you have a quick death apostate." Even her voice sounded weak. My father shifted his weight and stared blankly at Drea. He was not keen on attacking his own flesh and blood, truth was neither was I._

"_I will not let you harm him Templar. Go find your glory somewhere else."_

"_You have no say in this mage. He will pay for what he has done and you will burn for helping him escape. Now lay down your weapons and get on your knees." I was not going to kowtow to anyone, least of all my younger sister. She was letting her hatred rule her, something our mother warned us not to do._

"_Don't I have a say Drea or does what I think no longer matter?" _

"_Did he tell you my name?"_

"_No he did not have to. I have known your name my entire life, just as you know mine. We use to share everything, but now it seems you have me burned." I pulled my hood away from my face and I heard the gasps from her men. Even she was taken aback seeing me stand before her._

"_Maker's mercy, Knight Commander she...she looks like you." _

"_I should have known it was you. Who else would try to save such a pathetic waste of a man."_

"_He is not a waste, he is our father!"_

"_He is no kin of mine and neither are you my family died long ago. The Chantry is my family now. I have a purpose, a calling. I hunt your cursed kind so that they may know the wrath of the Maker for their sins."_

"_What sins? We did not ask to be born this way! I do not want these powers, not after what they cost me." Drea scoffed and drew her blade._

"_And what pray tell did they cost you?"_

"_They cost me my sister." A flash of sorrow crossed her eyes, but she did not let it show anywhere else. I knew she would not let us go without a fight and I would not give in to her wishes without one either. I pulled the blade that had pierced mt mother's heart from it scabbard. It still had the stain of her blood on it no matter how many times I have cleaned the blade. It did not go unnoticed by my sister or my father._

"_You dare use that blade!"_

"_It is only a blade Drea. It cuts like any other." I let flame wreath the blade and heard my sister growl. I felt the draining effects of their spell, but the flame never wavered. The wide eyes on my sister said enough. No other mage had ever been able to stand against this many Templars and keep their mana. "Are your talents lacking sister?"_

"_How?"_

"_Wouldn't you like to know?" I smiled and set my stance, my father backed away not wanting to fight his own daughter or get caught by one of my spells. "Let us finish this Drea, if you win I will be dead and you get your revenge on father. If I win you and your men walk away never to hunt us again."_

"_You have to kill me to win Mercy."_

"_As you wish." I let her make the first move. Her anger makes her sloppy, while I keep my head. Her swings are wild and choppy and I parry them easily. Her armor is heavy and slows her down. I wear robes re-enforced with leather and chainmail covering my vitals. Drea was always the one who was quick to temper, quick to quit when we would spar. I know today that this is win or die, but I will not kill my sister. I will not become the monster she claims me to be. I use my skill with a sword instead of my magic. I wanted to prove that I was much more than a power driven mage, I was a warrior. Our father and her men watched in awe as we clashed. I heard one of her men yelling for her to let him take me on, but she refused. This was more about her pride than it was about killing an apostate. She had never been able to beat me when we were children and even now she was faltering. Drea stumbled as she took a wild swing and I made my move. I shoved her over to the ground and brought my blade to her throat. Her men rushed forward to her rescue, but she waved them back._

"_Do not interfere!" She turned her eyes up to mine and I saw the look of utter defeat in them. "You won, what are you waiting for sister, kill me." _

"_No."_

"_If you don't I will hunt you down and make sure you pay."_

"_Do what you must, but for now I have beaten you and you agreed to the terms. Father and I leave, you and your men do not follow. If you want to hunt us later then do so, but know this I will not give in to your Chantry. You know as well as I do that they have skewed our mother's words. This is not what she wanted."_

"_Did she know what you were?"_

"_Yes, she always knew, that is why she had me training with the elven mage. I wasn't just learning to make potions and bandage wrapping. He taught me to control and use my magic."_

"_Why did she never tell me?"_

"_She thought it was better that no one know till the war was over. Even father did not know." Drea looked over to our father and he nodded. "We are leaving now, follow and I will show you what a true mage can do." Father and I left and much to my relief Drea did not follow. I knew it was not the last time I would see her or her men, but for now we were safe. I made the decision to take my father to Haven. It was a gamble, but I knew at least there we would be safe from the Templars. Little did I know, Drea had sent her second in command to follow us. Drea had hoped that he would find the hiding place of the Lost Faithful. Little did she know what awaited him in Haven. This man that she had put so much faith in would come to be my most trusted friend and ally, if she had known she never would have sent Justice after me. _

_\_

**I have to apologize for this taking so long to be posted. I am having problems with my computer again and have started a new job that takes a lot of time out of my day. There is at least one more chapter about Justice and Pash coming. It depends on where my muse takes me with this. I haven't forgotten I left Anders and Leigh hanging on the run from the Seekers. I promise that I will get back to them soon. I am sorry if this chapter is boring. I have to set up a lot of things before I end this story. As always to my readers thank you for reading and sticking with me this far. I hope you will stay with me to the end of this. I will try to write a bit faster, but that depends on my darn computer.**

**Much Love,**

**Raven**


	47. Chapter 47

_**Scroll 4. Seeking Justice**_

_**Written by Justice Knight Captain of the Order.**_

_Looking back on all that happened after Knight Commander Drea sent me to follow her sister, I wonder if I would have told her no. I was a loyal knight, believing in what I was taught, what I was told was the will of the Maker. I was so wrong, so utterly wrong. Mercy opened my eyes to what the world truly should have been like. I owe her more than I could ever repay, but I owe Drea just as much. Both women gave me a purpose and skills to act upon that purpose. Seeing them fight as they did over their father's life was nothing short of extraordinary. We had been taught mages could not fight as we Templars did. They resorted to magic more often than not, leaving them vulnerable our attacks. Mercy threw that thinking right out the tower window. She could handle a blade well, if not better than her sister. I was intrigued to see how she would fare against me. I prided myself to be the best warrior the order had. I hoped to one day to be a Knight Commander in my own rights, but fate had other plans. Here I will account the happenings of my journey. _

_OoO_

_I had followed the two for over a week now, tracking them was not hard. They made little effort to hide their trail. I kept my distance so I could find the rumored stronghold of the blasphemers. That was my first objective from Drea. The second was to bring her sister to her. It was strange to me that a woman so devote could be cursed with a sister who was a surge on the face of Thedas. The fact they shared the same face made it even more of a sin. I had long thought Drea was beautiful. Her skin was the color of honeyed cream, her eyes a deep dark blue like the seas after a storm. Her hair was dark with hints of red in it when the sun light hit it just right. I will have to admit I watched her more than I should have. It was not proper, but I did not care. When I joined the Order I was an orphan and Drea was the only one who gave me the time of day. We both rose in the ranks of the Templars. The Divine called us her most promising. I reveled in my station and my work. Magisters had killed my family just as the war was over. My parents and siblings died because they followed Andraste's teachings. I was out in the field with our hound running down supper. I hated mages for the pain they had caused me and I was determined to make them suffer for their unnaturalness. _

_It took us another week to come to what I had guessed was the stronghold, but to my great surprise it was a small town. It was nestled on the side of the Frostback Mountians. I took off most of my armor so as not to make a lot of noise as I began to sneak up to the town. It was early in the evening so the shadows hid me nicely. It was times like this I was thankful for the stealth I had learned being a hunter. I heard the women talking over the evening meal and some of the men talking about their next hunting trip. This place was nothing like I would have imagined. I had pictured mages making blood sacrifices and darkness everywhere. It was like any other small town I had ever seen in my life. I kept my distance and watched for most of the day. I saw children playing in the small town square. Some of them used wooden swords, others were using small spells. I watched the town till the sun set below the horizon. Once darkness fell I made my way silently into the heart of the town. _

_I watched from the shadows as the townspeople made their way up the hill to a large building. They carried food and other things up the hill. I waited till the last of them entered the building and went to investigate. I heard the Chant being sung and dishes being placed out. I rounded the building till I found a window to look through. The entire village was gathered for the evening meal. I saw my prey sitting at the head of the table with her traitorous father next to her. She had cut his hair and put him in plain clothes, but I knew who he was, even if her followers didn't. She was the one singing the Chant. I watched her raise her hands to the sky and gave the crowd permission to begin the meal. I was so engrossed in the scene in front of me I did not notice I had been spotted. As sharp pain through my shoulder let me know that I was caught. I hissed at the sight of an arrow in my flesh. The guards were on me faster than I thought possible. The last thing I saw before I blacked out was one of the men swinging a club at my head._

_OoO_

_I woke in a room that was too small to be a dwelling chamber. It had a bed and a bucket and that was all. Iron bars lined the room, I surmised that this was a jail cell of some kind. My wounded shoulder had been healed and my head did not hurt as it should from the blow I was dealt. I heard the door open and the one I had come here to capture walked through it._

"_Good you're awake." I rose from the bed and stood to face her. Her expression was kind, something I was not expecting. I saw a plate of food in her hands as well as a waterskin. My stomach betrayed me and grumbled loudly. She chuckled at me and set the food down on a small table. "How is your head?"_

"_What do you care malificar?"_

"_I care because as a healer I need to know if you have been healed completely. The town guards are very protective of their kin."_

"_They harbor apostates. Once the Chantry finds this place we will lay waste to it." She sighed and shook her head. She sat down on the bed and patted the space next to her for me to sit. I refused and stood, arms crossed over my chest. I put all the hate I had in my gaze hoping it would scare her. Little did I know it had little effect._

"_Since you were the only one to follow us I doubt they will find us anytime soon."_

"_So what you will keep me here, kill me?"_

"_I have no intentions of killing you, not after I went to all the trouble of healing you." She motioned to the food and my stomach rumbled again. "Please eat. You will need your strength."_

"_For what?"_

"_For the lyrium withdrawal that will be hitting you in a day or so." My eyes widened at her statement. How did she know about that? "I could feel it in your blood when I healed you. Lyrium should not be taken by anyone who is not a mage. It effects your brain after a while, makes you lose who you are."_

"_Liar! The Divine would not do that to her faithful." She rose from the bed and made her way to the door. I did not even try to stop her or escape. I knew full well if I tried the villagers would finished the job they started. _

"_I will check on you in a few hours. Please eat. When you are ready we will talk more."_

"_I have nothing more to say to you mage." Her eyes turned sad and something pulled at my heart. She looked too much like Drea. I had to shake my head and remind myself she was not her sister, she was an apostate. A cursed one, who was trying to enthrall me. "Leave me be!" She smiled and left me to my thoughts. I refused to eat or drink anything these accursed people had to offer. I felt nothing the first day of my captivity, but within a few days I wanted to slit my wrists. My sight was blurry, I heard things that weren't there. I was cold, then burning up. Thirst burned my throat and hunger tore at my gut. My body ached and shook violently. I wanted to die. I don't remember much about this that time and Mercy never told me all of what I went through, but I do remember her cool hands touching my face and her soft voice in my ears._

"_Templar I need you to drink this. It will help." I did what I was told, anything to stop the pain. I didn't even care that she used magic on me. Her touch was like a soothing balm and her voice was my salvation. I felt another spasm rack my body and I knew I must have screamed like a child having a nightmare. "Look at me Templar." _

"_Ple...please...make it st...stop."_

"_It has to take it's course. All I can do is try to make you more comfortable."_

"_Stay...I don't...want...to be...alone."_

"_I am right here. I will not leave you." Her words made me relax. The potion she had given me put me in a deep sleep. I know nothing af what happened after this till I woke days later._

_OoO _

_When I woke it was dark outside. I had no way of telling how long I had been out. My eyes were still blurry and my body felt like I had been trampled by a stamped. I felt something warm in my hand. I looked down as saw the mage was sleeping. Her body in a knelt position and her head on the bed. Her hand was entwined with mine, she had kept her promise. She had stayed. I slowly rose the upper half of my body so I could sit up, but my hand never left hers. She must have felt the shift in the bed because she woke with a start and stared up at me._

"_Thank the Maker, your finally awake." Her voice sounded happy. Did she not know I was sent to take her back to Val Royeaux? That she was to die if I did. Did she not care I was her enemy? The kindness in her eyes shocked me. "Here drink this." She handed me a glass full of water. I drank it down in one breath and felt my stomach clench. Her hands began to glow and passed over me. The pain slowly dissipated and I let out a sigh. "You need to take small sips, you haven't had much in you for over a week."_

"_A week?" She nodded and pushed me back down to the bed. _

"_You still are weak. You need to eat and rest. Tomorrow you can start walking around again. I will go get you some broth, just rest." I watched her leave the room, amazement clearly on my face. She was not at all the monster her sister made her out to be. At least if she was she hid it well. I have always prided myself with being able to read people. I saw no deceit in her eyes, no hate or fear. She was kind and gentle. It did not take her long to return with a bowl of broth and a crust of bread. I learned from the water not to rush, no matter how hungry I was. She sat next to me and watched quietly. Her hands sat in her lap. Looking at her arms I saw none of the telltale signs of blood magic. Her arms were perfect and pale. Ever thing about her was soft and beautiful. I finally got up the courage to ask her the question that had been burning in my mind since I woke._

"_Why?"_

"_I do not like to see anyone suffer. You are not my enemy, nor am I yours."_

"_Drea..."_

"_My sister is angry and I am the perfect one to blame. She blames all mages for what happened to our mother."_

"_Your mother?" A small fit of laughter bubbled out of her mouth and she shook her head._

"_She never told you did she?" I know the look on my face told her I did not know what she spoke of. She stood up and paced the small cell for a moment before looking back at me. Her eyes rimmed with tears and her face sad. "Drea and I are the daughters of Andraste."_

"_Impossible, she had no children."_

"_Why do you think she called Maferath father?"_

"_I...I don't know. How can this be?"_

"_I know you are a Templar, but surely you know how children are made." _

"_Of course I do, but how is it the Divine or even Drea herself hasn't told anyone that our Lady is her mother?"_

"_The Divine would not want anyone to rival her in anyway and Drea...I do not know what my sister thinks anymore. She and I were inseparable as children, but when we watched our mother die...it was then she found out I was a mage. She thought me a monster, no better than those who put out mother to the flame. You are close to Drea I assume?"_

"_She handpicked me to be her Knight Captain."_

"_She always did have an eye for talent." I laughed in spite of myself. _

"_Not so talented am I? Your men caught me and now here I sit talking to an apostate. Some Templar I turned out to be." Her cool hand brushed mine and I felt a shiver run through me. _

"_The town guard got lucky and as for talking to me...I prefer talk to threats and battle. The people here just want to live in peace. They harm no one."_

"_That might be true for here, but I have seen first hand what mages can do. They killed my family, left me an orphan."_

"_I...I am sorry." _

"_Magic should not be in the hands of man. We are not gods. It should be only in the hands of the Maker."_

"_I agree with you, but he gave us this power as a test. He gave us free will to do what we would with it. It is our failing not his. We chose to use our magic for good or ill. I prefer to use mine for good."_

"_You have never been tempted to use it to harm."_

"_Only once. When they had my mother...I used my magic against the Archon and his wife. It wasn't right for me to do. I was trained better than that."_

"_You regret it then?"_

"_Not the outcome, but yes. Magic should be used in defense not aggression."_

"_The outcome?" The mage sighed and told me all of what had happened to our beloved Andraste. The pain in her eyes was intense, even after all these years. It was a look I had seen on Drea many times when she thought no one was looking and now I know why it was there. I had heard the stories, but to hear it from someone who witnessed it first hand, it was much more than what the mothers spoke of. They said that the Archon gave her mercy of his own accord, now to hear it was do to threat from this woman...it made it all seem so much more real. "So what we have been told was a lie."_

"_No, but some things were withheld. He did grant my mother mercy and he did convert to the ways she had fought so hard to bring about. My role in it all was left out. I think mostly because of Drea. All the faithful that witnessed my mother's passing are here in Haven. The Divine, she was in Orlais as far as I know at the time. She had been dismissed by my mother for some reason or another. I was never told why, but I do know they had a very heated argument." We conversed for a while longer and I noticed the sun rising. The light streaming through the window bathed the woman in an ethereal light. _

"_We have conversed all night and yet I still do not know your name." She smiled brightly before answering._

"_My name is Mercy." I had to laugh._

"_Lady Mercy, daughter of the great Andraste." _

"_And what of your name Ser?"_

"_Justice, my parents...they thought it proper to name me after a virtue."_

"_They chose right as far as I am concerned." She rose from the bed and held out her hands to me. "Come, there is much you need to see. If after you still want to take me to Val Royeaux then I will go peacefully." I stiffened and stared at her. "I know why she sent you, I am not blind. I only ask if I do go with you that you will not tell them about this place. The people here deserve to live in peace."_

"_You would sacrifice yourself for them?"_

"_Yes." We walked in silence up the mountain. At the top was a temple, the likes I had never seen before. Mercy still held my hand as we entered the building. A man in full armor stood in front of a grand set of doors. His face stoic and his weapon drawn. "It is alright, he may pass."_

"_But my Lady, he is a Templar."_

"_I am well aware."_

"_My Lady?"_

"_Leave us please." The man bowed and left. She turned back to me and motioned for me to follow. The room we entered was lines with ghostly figures on both sides. I baulked at the door, but she kept walking. "These are just echos, nothing to fear. The priests who built this temple call it the Gaunlet. It tests your faith and character. Everyone of us that is of age has passed through it. If you are found unworthy you will go no farther and have to go back the way you came."_

"_What is at the end of it?"_

"_If you are worthy, you will find out. I will be waiting for you at the end, but first I pose a question to you. When your family died, did you place all the blame on the mage who killed them, or did you blame yourself?"_

"_My self for not being there to protect them." Her eyes showed compassion and a depth of understanding._

"_I will see you at the end. The rest is up to you." _

_OoO_

_I stumbled through what I hoped was the last door in this place. After answering riddles and coming face to face with a apparition of my father, all I wanted to do was get out of this temple. The room made my hopes sink. It had a door at the far end, but no clear way around. Defeated I sat down. A soft hand on my shoulder startled me. Jumping to my feet I readied myself for another fight._

"_Peace Justice. I am here to help you cross." Mercy stood before me. She had changed her clothes, now she was wearing a simple white gown. _

"_How there is no bridge?"_

"_Faith and trust take many forms. You must have both to cross this room." She walked over to a stone plate on the floor and stood on it. Before my eyes a piece of the bridge appeared. Magic. I placed a hesitant foot on the bridge and found it held. _

"_How do I know you won't..."_

"_You don't, but ponder this. If I wanted you dead, I could have done it at anytime."_

"_So I have to trust you to cross?"_

"_You have to trust yourself. I can make the bridge become solid, but you are the one who has to believe it is there." I looked over the end of the bridge piece and gasped. The floor of the pit was covered in jagged rocks. One false step and I would not survive._

"_Maker."_

"_Take a deep breath Justice and have faith in yourself." I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Mercy moved to the other side of the room and pushed another plate down. The next section of the bridge appeared. This time I stepped on without hesitation. It went the same with the last two sections until I was across. Mercy crossed the room with ease before waving her hands making the bridge fade away._

"_Is it an illusion?" Taking a rock she threw it where the bridge had just stood and I watched it fall to the floor of the pit. A cold shiver ran down my spine._

"_Come there is one more test before the end." I nodded and followed her to the next room. A wall of fire no more than four foot high cut through the room. A small stone alter stood just in front of the flames. "This is the final test. Read the inscription on the alter over there. The choice of what you want to do is yours." I did as I was told and read the craved words in the stone alter._

"_I have to strip all of my clothes off?" Mercy shrugged her delicate shoulders. "Have you done this test, have you done any of them?"_

"_I have been through them all, even this one. If you choose not to I will think no less of you. It takes courage and innocence to walk through flames."_

"_Innocence?"_

"_Without your clothes you greet the Maker the same way you greeted the world when you were born. Children are innocent, a clean slate. They see the world like it truly is. No war, no hate, they see everyone equally."_

"_But we aren't."_

"_Class, race, and color mean nothing. We all feel pain, we bleed the same color blood. We know hunger, joy, love and most of all we all know fear. Children should not know the fear of being hated for being born different. I do not hate you for being normal. I would give almost anything to not be a mage, to have my sister by my side. I miss her, I miss my mother. I could hate the Tevinters, but I would be no better than them. We have to stop the fear, the hate."_

"_You make it sound so easy."_

"_It isn't, but nothing worthy in life is. I will leave you to choose. Either way once this is done you can leave here. I will not beg you to stay or not to bring the Templars here. I will honor my words." She turned and walked right through the flames clothing and all. I saw her stop for a moment and stare at the statue of Andraste and say a quick prayer. I did not hear her words, but the sound of her voice was sad. Once she left I stared at the flames and tried to make sense of all of this. She was not the monster I thought she was. She was a woman trying to protect her people just as her mother had. With a shaky breath I started to take off my clothing. Once I was naked I took a few steps toward the flames. I did not feel heat as I thought I would have. _

"_Maker if this is your plan for me then I will embrace it, but please give me a sign so I know this is right." A warm hand took mine and I snapped my head to the side. A woman in a silver dress stood next to me. Her features like Mercy's, but older, harsher in some respects. She smiled at me and motioned for me to walk forward. Crimson flushed my face and my neck standing next to this woman without a stitch of clothing on, but she did not seem to notice. She held my hand as we walked through the flames. I felt like I was walking though tall grass not fire. The woman stopped walking once we reached the other side of the flames and spoke._

"_Your faith is strong Justice, as in your spirit. We have watched you for years now. I have seen you stand by Drea and help her through some of the darkest days. Now I ask you to stand by Mercy the same way."_

"_Why?"_

"_She is losing her way. As strong as she is, she can't do this alone. None of the people here are her equal. They are faithful, devoted to her, but not on par with her. You have proven yourself worthy of both my daughters." I felt her squeeze my hand and the dull aches I had been feeling from the lyrium withdrawal faded away. "They made you a slave to lyrium, to them. This is not what I wanted, I did not want more people to be kept as slaves." A strange realization came over me. I was standing in front of the great Andraste. _

"_How is it I can feel your hand in mine? You died over a decade ago."_

"_I am here, but I am not. All who believe carry a piece of me in their hearts. I have become like the Maker. I am his bride, his love. His last gift to me for my faith."_

"_Last gift?"_

"_My first gifts from him were my daughters. First was Mercy whose compassion knows no bounds. Second was Drea who has more courage than anyone I have ever met. She will remember it before the end who she really is."_

"_They really are the Maker's children!"_

"_Yes, as are we all. They are mortal born so they can learn things that he will never know. They know pain, fear. He wanted to learn through them how his mortal children fair in life."_

"_Then why has he not stopped all this? Why does he leave us here to suffer as we do? He lets his own children be hunted down and does not lift a finger! Does he not care about us that much!"_

"_He gave mortals free will to step in now..."_

"_Would make us like the first of his children."_

"_He gave the world two who could lead all into peace and prosperity if all follow them."_

"_How do you get all to follow when there are people who don't believe or hate the others?"_

"_That is the question he has put to us. Is our hatred and pride worth all of the misery we will suffer without his love?"_

"_Some people thrive on pain and misery."_

"_Those people will not be let in his kingdom when the time comes. All who believe and live a good life helping others will find peace by his side. Those who bring misery to others who let greed and pride dictate their lives will find themselves banished to the void."_

"_Is this his plan for me? To be protector to Mercy?" Andraste smiled at me and shook her head. Her other hand found mine and she rose on her toes to whisper in my ear._

"_You have the right to choose your own path Justice. Either way you will be standing beside one of his daughters. You just had to see both sides of the story to make the choice right for you. Once you have dressed go to the urn holding my ashes up there and take one small pinch and bring it back to me." I did as I was instructed and dressed before ascending the stairs to the urn. Before I even thought of touching the urn I said a prayer. An image of Mercy flashed in my head and it was as if the Maker had answered my question. It was Mercy I was to follow, to protect. I opened the urn and took a pinch of the ashes and walked back to the place I had left Lady Andraste. Her hand was held out for me to place the ashes in her palm. "This will rid you of your dependency on lyrium. Your Templar talents will still work the same, but you will not have the negative aftereffects." _

"_I thought Mercy had cured me of this already?"_

"_She had great power, but she could only take the symptoms away not the cause." She took the ashes and drew an image on my forehead before sending a wave of energy through me. It was like I was seeing clearly for the first time in a long time. "I leave you to make your choice. Know either way you are one of our chosen and have place beside the Maker. Farewell Justice."_

"_Farewell My Lady." She shimmered and disappeared in a whirl of mist leaving me in the Temple alone. I saw a door to my right and walked out of it. The sun hurt my eyes, but my spirit felt lighter. Mercy stood in the middle of the mountain top. She had her back to me as I approached her. My foot falls must have been lost to the wind because she jumped when I place myself next to her. Her eyes fell on the my forehead and she gasped. _

"_Who put that mark on you?"_

"_Our Lady." Her eyes went wider and tears started to flow. "She helped me through the last trial."_

"_She must see something in you to have come back." I saw the sadness in her face. She looked like a lost child waiting for their parent to come and find them. I had seen the look many times. In mages we have taken from their families and also in children given to the Chantry because they had nowhere else to go._

"_Has she never come to you since...?"_

"_No, I have prayed and waited, but she has never shown. The people here look to me for leadership, but I am not her! She left me to take her place and I can't!"_

"_Yes you can." Her face changed from the anger and sadness to confusion. "I saw you fight your sister. You are a strong woman Mercy. You showed compassion to Drea and the rest of us. You could have killed us, but you didn't. You are a leader, but no leader can shoulder all of this alone. Even Andraste had help. I...I want to help you. Those trials opened my eyes, you have opened my eyes. I will not return to the Chantry. My place is here with you...that is if you will have me." _

"_I can't ask you to do that. This life...it will be hard and bloody. If the Divine keeps pushing I will have to push back. You would have to fight your fellows. I would not have you go through what I have to with Drea. The price is too high." I took her hands then and met her gaze. In her eyes I saw hope and fear. I also saw in those beautiful eyes a capacity to forgive and love. It was humbling to me after all the years of anger and loathing I had placed on mages. This woman was not a monster, neither were the children I saw in the village. They were innocent of what the Chantry accused them of. It that moment I let go of the hate I had held and let my faith guide me. _

"_You said I would have to make a choice and I choose to stay. I do not want to let what happened to my family poison my soul. The person who killed them was evil, but it was not the fact he was a mage that made him such."_

"_Evil can consume any heart if we let it in. It is up to us to choose to act on wicked thoughts or choose not to."_

"_Then my dear lady please let me make this oath. I pledge my sword to protecting your life. I pledge my strength to you when you can no longer bare to shoulder this alone. I will help you bring justice to all who have been wrongly taken from their families." _

"_I except your pledge ser knight. Let us go back to the village and find you a place to sleep. I will have the smithy make you new armor. The Chantry uses the burning sword of mercy as their symbol but they have it pointing up ready to strike their foes. We use it pointing down at rest, at peace. To be used only when all else fails."_

"_I will be honored to wear it."_

"_My sister will think you are dead."_

"_I will find a way to get word to her in time. I owe her that much."_

"_I understand." I followed her back down the mountain toward my new life. In the years that followed Mercy became my wife and the mother of my children. We tried to free all of the people the Chantry held under their boot, but it seems we have failed. I send this account as well as my children into the care of the faithful. May they never know the fear that we have. May they live a full and peaceful life. Neither have the gift of magic, a blessing in someways and a pity in others. They are just babes and will not remember us and that pains me more than anything, but they will be safe. I go now with Mercy to face the Divine. The time is now and I pray the Maker shows us favor. If not then I know I will find peace in his kingdom with Mercy by my side for eternity._

_**One more chapter from the past to go and then I will get back to our heroes. To all my readers than you for your patience and your support. There are days I just can't seem to get my muse to work with me, but I will try to post more often. Again I thank you all your reviews and follows make writing this all worth while.**_

_**Raven **_


	48. Chapter 48

_**Scroll 5: Knowledge and Forgiveness.**_

_**Written by: Drea Knight Commander of the Order.**_

_I write this account so that someday what happened to my sister, to Justice will never happen again. The Divine is not what she seems. I was blind for so many years. I hated my own sister for being what she was, a mage, but most of all I hated her for being stronger than me. She had the courage to stop the Archon when I sat there crying like a babe. She never backed down from anything even when it came to fighting against her own sister. Mercy truly was the best of us and now my sister is gone. Burned like my mother by the faithless. I have taken her children and made sure no one would even find them. One was sent to the North to live with the barbarians in the Anderfels, the other to the South to run with the Wild Ones. In time I hope one of her line will return and stop this madness should I fail. I will lay here to account of what I know and how my sister and I found our way back to each other. _

_The weeks had slowly ticked by as I waited for news from Justice. He alone I trusted to bring my sister back to face the Divine. Through the years since I had lost my mother Justice had been my only real friend. We both lost our families to the deplorable act of mages, both of us skilled in heavy armor and swords. We became like siblings. He had been anchor, my conscious. The longer he was gone the more I thought I had sent my friend to his death. I threw myself into training my men to keep my mind from going to the worst case. After three weeks I received a visit from the Divine. As devote as I was, the woman always set my wits on end. _

"_I see the new recruits are taking to their training."_

"_Yes, Your Holiness. I am quite pleased with them." I watched her cross my quarters and begin to pick at some of the few trinkets I was able to keep from my childhood. One she paid particular attention to was a carved piece of ironwood in the shape of hawk. She ran her fingers over it and was silent for a few minutes. I stood stark still hoping she would just leave so I could go about my day._

"_I have not seen Ser Justice of late. Is he ill?" I tried hard not to flinch under her stare, but her dark eyes seemed to look right into my very soul._

"_No, I have him out on a errand in the Wilds. He should be returning within the next week." _

"_You sent him to find the malificar, did you not?"_

"_He volunteered to bring her back." _

"_I see. As long as she lives the Chantry is in danger. The lies she spews taint the hearts of the lost faithful. Their absence weighs heavy on my heart."_

"_Mine as well. She will be brought in to face justice Your Holiness. You have my word." The Divine smiled at me and patted my shoulder. A small shiver ran down my spine, one I hoped she did not notice._

"_I trust your word Drea. You have always been the most faithful of my knights. Your mother would be proud. I am sorry that the one we hunt is your own blood. It saddens me that Our Lady's own child would speak vile and blasphemous things against her mother's own words."_

"_Her traitorous tongue shall be silenced soon."_

"_See that it is. Please inform me as soon as your Knight Captain returns."_

"_As you wish." I watched her leave and let out a shaky breath. I had to take my mind off of Justice's absence and my own growing unease with the Divine. I made my way to the Circle tower to make sure my men were doing their assignments as I had them. What I found upon my arrive disturbed me greatly. Six of my men had a mage on the ground and were beating him violently. The mage made no effort to fight back as my men continued to accost him. I stalked into the crowd and pulled two of my men back. "What is the meaning of this?!"_

"_Commander...we...this mage stole from the kitchens." _

"_Stole what? A dagger, a pot or anything that could be used as a weapon?" Ser Peter, one of my first knights looked at the ground and shook his head._

"_He stole some apples."_

"_He stole some fruit? You are beating a man to death over a few pieces of fruit! Maker's blood, I know I trained you better than this. We only take to action if they are possessed, use their magic outside of their classes or if they take arms against us. All of you are on report, and I will dealing with your punishments later. Go to the barracks and simmer down."_

"_Yes, Commander." I watched them go and could not help the anger surging through my blood. I offered my hand to the badly beaten mage and hoisted him to his feet. I could see one of his eyes was already swollen shut and his lips were split. Blood matted down his hair making discerning the color impossible. His breathing was also raspy which concerned my greatly. I slowly took him to the healer and waited while the man worked his craft._

"_His ribs are broken Commander, so are his nose and jaw. I must request more lyruim so I can heal him properly."_

"_I will go and get it for you Sorn. Ease his pain for now." _

"_Commander, was he...did he attack your men?"_

"_No, he did nothing wrong. I do not condone this Sorn. The Templars will be dealt with I swear to you." The elderly elven mage just nodded sadly and poured more healing magic into the beaten mage. I rushed myself to the alchemy room and took as many potions as my arms could hold. Guilt ripped through my gut. If I had not been so preoccupied with the absence of Justice, this would not have happened. I handed the lyrium over to Sorn and stood against the wall out of his way. After what seemed like hours the older mage pushed away from the cot and made his way slowly to where I was standing._

"_He needs rest, but should be right as rain in a few days."_

"_Go rest yourself Sorn. I will make sure he is taken care of."_

"_Commander this is not the first time the knights have done this." _

"_What?"_

"_While you were away they..." Sorn looked to the ground and shook his head. I gently took his hand and placed my other on his shoulder._

"_What did they do Sorn?"_

"_You know of the young woman Talia?" I nodded, she was a young mage I myself had brought to be taught here to control her magic. "They assaulted her and later than night she...hung herself." _

"_Why was I not told of this sooner?"_

"_I feared that it was by your order. More and more I have been healing mages who will not tell me how they were injured." My stomach turned sour and I knew tears were threatening to fall from my eyes. I did not trust mages, but would never mean them harm if they have done nothing to warrant it._

"_Were you threatened?" He did not have to tell me I could see in his eyes fear. I let out a long sigh and let go of his hand. "I know I said for you to rest, but I ask that you stay with him a while longer. I have to stop this now before someone else is hurt. This is not how I trained these men. I will not stand for this type of abuse." I left his side and headed to the barracks with violence on my mind. I kicked the door open and made my men jump. I had trained all of them and knew that if I had to I could beat them all in hand to hand. Most of these men were newer to The Order and were not handpicked by me. My men, the ones Justice and I personally trusted were out across Thedas setting up new Circles. These men in front of me were young, most orphans and slum rats. It would explain some of their actions, but not all. "Sit down, now." My voice was colder than a winter's night. _

"_Commander before you..." I moved faster than they thought I could. The one who spoke I think his name was Ellin was on the ground my hand at his throat. I might not have been as large as most of my men, but I come from barbarian stock. I was taught to surprise you opponent to gain the advantage._

"_I did not give you permission to speak. This is not for debate, now go sit before I run your sorry hide through." He nodded quickly and scrambled the his feet upon my release of him. The others looked just as frightened of me as he did and also conceded to my wishes. "Why am I hearing about Talia's death now?"_

"_She killed herself Commander, she sinned in the eyes of the Maker." I stared one of the others in the eyes and he flinched. My mother always said I was a good judge of character. I was always able to smell a lie a mile away, I really hate liars._

"_Taking what is not yours or given is also a sin in the eyes of the Maker. That's why we flogged the thief. Commander we can't treat these mages like people. They are cursed, sinners. Magic shall serve man not rule over him." I turned to the other little piss ant who dared to speak and sneered. _

"_Don't you dare preach to me Narth. I have heard Andraste's words from her own mouth while you and your family suffered under Tevinter rule. I was with her army, I fought to see use free of the magisters. The line you quoted is wrong. Magic is to help mankind, but never rule over it. All who suffer under another are granted peace at the Maker's side for all eternity."_

"_But Commander that is how it is written in the Book of Chants."_

"_Show me." One of them handed me a very large ornate book and I skimmed through the pages. So many things were wrong or reworded. I had read all my mother's writings and these were not her words. These were not what she meant. Anger welled in me. Someone had changed them. Someone had dared to change my mother's words. "This is not what the Lady wrote or preached."_

"_This is what we were taught before being sent here. Mages have no rights, they are a curse from the Maker for our sins. It is a Templars' duty to make sure they know their place." I growled and threw the book into the fire. My blood burned with anger at my mother's words being twisted. The younger Templars stood gaping at my actions, but I did not care. I was more than livid and planned on voicing it to the senior members of the Chantry._

"_You are all confined to these barracks until I sort this out. If I so much as hear you go near any of the mages I will personally flog you all." They nodded and kept silent. I spun on my heels and made my way to the Grand Cathedral. The warm sun did nothing to ease my ire. I normally loved taking the long walk from the Tower to the Cathedral, but today it just made it worse. I never noticed just how much gold and labor went into building the bloody thing. Part of me wondered how much blood was used to place the Divine in her current position. I had fleeting memories of my mother chiding the woman for her over zealousness. Now I was starting to understand why. I did not wait to be announced as I stormed into the woman's chambers. She hid a expression of shock quickly and rose to greet me._

"_Drea is everything alright?"_

"_I just found my men beating a mage for no other reason, than the man flinched two apples from the larder. When I questioned them they preceded to tell me that it was their right to treat mages however they saw fit because it was written in the Chant."_

"_I...I am not sure why you are here talking about it to me dear. It is written that way, just as Andraste wanted." I took a swift step towards the woman and saw fear in her eyes. _

"_You might be able to lie to the rest of the faithful, but do not play this game with me. I am her daughter, I know better than most what she wrote and how she wanted her words to be used. I do not agree with abusing mages just because they happen to have the affliction of magic. It makes us no better than the Imperium."_

"_If we do not act and show them they are powerless now, they will rise up and take control again. Surely you see this."_

"_I see many things and I am not sure if I can condone them anymore. I will not let anyone, not even you, sully my mother's words."_

"_I will be retraining my men and letting go the ones who will not do as I ask. I agree mages must be trained and kept separate from normal people. What I do not agree with is making their lives miserable. They are not beasts, they are people." The Divine gave me a condescending smile and patted my arm._

"_Drea, in time you will understand, for now things must be this way. I pray it will not be forever, but I must do the will of the people and they want the mages to be locked away. They don't care if a few die or are abused. I put you in charge of my Templars because you are fair minded and strong. I will allow you to fix what you want in your command, but I fear you are fighting a losing battle." My words ran dry and I just shook my head. I did not wait to be dismissed, I knew the conversation was over and I would not be placated. I went back to my room and sat on my cot. The tiny figurine of the hawk caught my gaze and tears began to well in my eyes. This small trinket was part of a set. I wonder if my sister still had her figurine of the dove. Clutching the smooth carving in my hands I lay back in my bed and began to cry._

_OoO_

_After I composed myself I went to find Sorn and the Knight Lieutenant who I hastily left in charge upon my departure. I found them in the main room of the library. Sorn was sitting back in a chair while Kith, the Knight Lieutenant was pacing. The sound of my metal footfalls must have gotten his attention. He stopped and let out a sigh of relief at my presence._

"_Commander...thank the Maker." Sorn stood and gave a small smile to me._

"_Knight Commander the mage you saved is recovering nicely. He wishes to thank you when you have time." _

"_Of course, Kith why do you look like mouse in a cat house?"_

"_The men you punished this morning are calling for a audience with the Divine. They want you removed from leadership."_

"_Why, because I reprimanded them?"_

"_No, because they said you burned a copy of the Chant of Light. I...you didn't, did you?" _

"_I did, because it had lies written in it." Kith turned white as a sheet and sank into a chair. _

"_Holy Maker, Commander...this will end badly. You trained me, I trust you, but..." I placed a firm friendly hand on his shoulder and knelt in front of him._

"_Kith do you know who I am? Do you know who my mother was?" He swallowed hard and nodded. _

"_That is why I trust your word Commander. But if the Divine asks me to..."_

"_She won't, because we are leaving." I turned to Sorn and gestured for him to come closer. "I want you to gather those you can. We will not be able to get them all out of here, as much as I would like to. You know the ones who will follow and who are trustworthy. I will not leave you here to suffer like this. I have been blind and I am tired of stumbling in this darkness."_

"_Drea? Are you sure about this? It will mean a death sentence for you." I gave the elder man a smirk._

"_Sorn, I had a death sentence on my head before the time I was five summers old. It does not bother me at all."_

"_Your mother would be proud of you."_

"_I doubt that. I...I tried to...Maker I tried to kill my own sister."_

"_If I know your sister she has already forgiven you." I looked at the elf with wide eyes and he gently took my hands. "I watched both of you grow up. I trained your sister to use her magic."_

"_Why didn't she tell me she was a mage?" Sorn sighed and shook his head._

"_I told your mother that it would be best to keep it quiet til Mercy could control her powers. I feared if it was known that someone might try to hurt her or even you since you two look so much alike. Mercy was told to tell no one, not even you till the time was right."_

"_That time never came."_

"_No it did not, but there is still time for you and your sister to make peace."_

"_Maybe." I let go of his hands and turned back to Kith. A thought had come to my mind. "Have the Templars had their lyrium potions today?"_

"_Not yet, I haven't mixed the potion."_

"_Sorn do you have any deathroot or nightshade?"_

"_Commander are you planning to poison the knights?"_

"_No Kith, just make them a bit ill. It will stop them from being a problem, at least for a little while." _

"_Then we should hurry and make the potion. I don't relish the thought of having to fight any of the men." Sorn led Kith into the potion room, while I went back to my room. I closed the door and began to pace. Poisoning my men was something I never thought I would have to do. Also taking a group of mages out of the Tower was also something that never crossed my mind. In all I knew we only had over a dozen mages here, most turned themselves in to us when the sweeps started. I knew of a few who would want freedom more than the others, but those were ones I shuttered at the thought of them free again. My mind raced at all the possibilities and then it fell to the mage who was beaten earlier in the day. I quickly left my room and went to see him. I found him standing looking out a window. He heard the clang of my armor and turned to face me._

"_Commander." Without the swollen face and blood smears I could finally tell who this man was. Justice had been the one to bring the man in. From what I could remember he had told me this mage had put up a fight when he was finally cornered. _

"_Sorn told me you were almost recovered from..." He cut me off before I could finish, part of me was glad for it. _

"_The old man is a gifted healer and I have had much worst beatings I assure you. Comes with being a magister's slave." I could just nod my head at that. I was born free more or less. Staring at him now I could see he was handsome. Short straw colored hair graced his head and his hazel eyes had a twinkle of mischief in them. "I want to thank you for stopping them. It...I was surprised you would waste your time on a mage."_

"_Waste my time?"_

"_It is not like anyone will miss me if they did happen to kill me. Mages are curses on their fellow man, am I right?"_

"_No...you are not a curse." He cocked his head to the side and took a step forward closing the distance between us with ease. _

"_Really that is not what I was told when they caught me and dragged me here. That's not what they told that girl when they raped her and forced her to kill herself. If we are not cursed, then please tell me why I am here?"_

"_I..."_

"_You can't, can you? You bought into the Chantry's way of thinking. Andraste fought against mages so let's lock them up, kill them if they resist. You should have let your men kill me Templar. It would have been far kinder. At least I would be free." His eyes blazed with hate and it struck the very core of me. I had allowed this. I had trained people to use the talents that came so naturally to me. I alone did not have to use lyrium to fuel my talents, they were just there. _

"_What is your name?"_

"_What does it matter?"_

"_It matters."_

"_Zander."_

"_Zander, I made a terrible mistake. I trusted the Divine to follow Andraste's teachings and she changed them to fit her own fears. I...I will not let anyone else suffer under this abuse. I am giving you the chance to be free, but I need to know that you will listen to me and not turn on us as soon as we are clear of here."_

"_This is a trick, isn't it? Get us to trust you then take the opportunity to kill us. Do you hate us that much?"_

"_I don't hate you or anyone for that matter, I want to make this right, but I can't do that if you don't trust me." His hand snaked out and grabbed my throat, pinning mt to the wall. I could see pure hate in his eyes. The guilt I had been feeling rose at the look in his eyes. _

"_You know I could just take you right now, let you know what we feel every day we are forced to be here. Maybe you should know fear Templar. Have your life stolen from you, your virtue, like they did to Talia. No one would be able to hear you scream if I put a Glyph of Paralysis on you. You would be powerless."_

"_Wh...what is stop...stopping you?" His hand dropped from my throat and he turned away. I could see him shaking like a leaf in the wind. When he turned back to me I saw regret and loathing in his eyes._

"_Why weren't you afraid?"_

"_I grew up fighting Zander. I have seen people I cared about killed right in front of me, my mother included. Fear stopped me from doing anything to save her. I swore that I would never let fear rule me again. I also have a knack for reading people and you are not the type to violate a woman. I have watched you with the other mages here and you have been the picture of valor and chivalry."_

"_Do you mean what you say? Will you help us leave here and let us be free?" The hope in his eyes was clear. He wanted freedom, he wanted a life of his own making. Not a life forced on him. I had become no better than the Archon and it sickened me. I had to set it right even if it killed me in the process. _

"_You have my word that once we leave Val Royeaoux, you and the others will be free. I will protect all of you till I know you are safe." _

"_The others, they will not trust you easily."_

"_I don't blame them for that. This is why I have asked Sorn to come with us. Knight Captian Kith and I will be the only Templars. You will have us out numbered."_

"_Will you arm us?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Maker, you have more guts than I thought you did. You know as well as I do we will turn on you." I smiled at him then. _

"_I have faith that you won't. If Kith and I die you will have no one to defend you. Most of the mages here are old or children. How long will you last? The other Templars will just out right kill you. I am giving you a chance to live freely again." I took off my gauntlet and brought my work dagger to my palm. I had done this once before as a child with my sister. It was a blood oath, unbreakable, a permanent reminder. I let the blade run the width of my palm and watched as the blood rose from the cut. Zander's eyes went wide and his hand began to glow with healing magic._

"_Are you insane? Why are you..."_

"_It is a custom of my people. We make a cut and swear an oath. Some go as far as mixing the blood of two or more people to bind them to the oath."_

"_Your people?"_

"_The Alamarri. The barbarians of the south."_

"_Your one of Andraste's people." I could not help the smirk that graced my lips. If only he knew, but now was not the time to tell him. I made a fist with cut hand and let the blood coat my flesh. I let myself fall to one knee in front of him and swore my oath._

"_I swear on the ashes of my mother that I will not let any of you under my charge be taken or killed. I swear to protect all of you with my life. I have allowed this atrocity to go on for too long. I failed to remember Andraste's words and let my own guilt and hatred blind me. I will not allow that to happen again." My blood threatened to over flow on to the floor if it had not been for his healing spell. He healed it to a point that only a fine scar could be seen. I smiled at him and took his hand when he offered it to help me to my feet._

"_Do I have to say something to bind this oath?"_

"_No, it is mine alone to uphold." _

"_When do we leave?"_

"_Tonight, after evening meal. Go and pack whatever you need, but pack light. Clothing, potions the weapons you will get once we get out of the city." He left the room and I went back to find Kith. He and Sorn had the potion all ready now it was time to distribute it. Kith suggested it should be him to do it and I agreed. Sorn left us to gather those he trusted and said he would meet us at the entrance after dinner. I spent the time packing what few belongings I held dear. The hours sped by and our exodus drew near. I prayed to the Maker I could pull this off._

_OoO_

_We left Orlais under the cover of darkness. We took less then a dozen mages with us, most of them barely into their adulthood. Sorn was the oldest and Tam, a young man from Nevarra was the youngest at the tender age of seven. Sorn told me the boy's mother had marched him into the Grand Cathedral and told the priests there her son was cursed and left him there. The boy was barely old enough to walk then. His magic had grown since that time, but his demeanor had stayed the same. The boy was kind, naïve, and always tried to be of help. Most of the mages called him the embodiment of purity and innocence. I found that Zander was very protective of this boy. If fact he was protective of all of them. He helped Sorn sooth the fears of the others at our presence. Most of the mages did not trust Kith or myself. I did not blame them in the slightest. I was not sure I trusted them either. _

_We spent the next few months moving from place to place. When winter hit we lost two to frostbite and one to the wasting. Kith and I did our best to find food and to keep peace between the mages and ourselves. I had wished I had Justice with us. His presence was surely missed, as was his hunting skills. I was trained to be an archer, but it was not my strongest skill. The cold and lack of food were not the greatest danger to us though. The Divine was not happy with our defection and sent her Seekers after us. Normally we could stay on step ahead of them, but with the winter it was harder. The loss of the three mages made the others question their chances for freedom. _

_I made the decision to head south into homeland. The weather was harsher there and the people were more sparely populated. It was strange coming home again. The last time I was here I had tracked down my traitorous father and found my sister. I had to shake the thoughts out of my head to keep them from crushing me. Sorn had been a Maker send through the months. He kept me sane, he kept the mages from turning on us. His knowledge of herbs and healing where put to the test time and time again as winter turned to spring and we were hit by a whole new set of hardships. Spring heralded the rainy season of the Wild Country. With the rains come flooding, the chance for rot to set in if we did not change our clothes and boots regularly. We camped in caves and ruins, on nights the rain was absent I would go and stare at the twinkling stars wondering if my sister was near by. I had a feeling she was here in this country, but had no desire to even try to find her. What would I say to her? After what happened the last time we met and the fact Justice was gone I knew we would never be able to forgive each other. Our mother would be ashamed of both of us, but even she could not have foreseen all of this. The price of freedom came with the blood of the innocent. _

"_Commander?" I turned to see Tam standing by a tree. His feet bare and mud covered. His innocent demeanor made me smile. Even after all he had seen in the Tower and out here in the past months he still was so innocent._

"_You should be sleeping Tam. We will be making a long journey up the mountains tomorrow." He took a few steps closer to me and stood at my side. He looked up at the moon and raised his hand up as if he was trying to touch it. A small hint of magic filled the air and I watched him make a symbol over the moon. "What is that?"_

"_It's a spell to take hurt away. You look sad."_

"_I am just thinking."_

"_Why did you save us?" In all the months we had been traveling none of the other mages have ever asked me that. Here it comes from the mouth of a babe. I knelt down on one knee so I could look him in the eye._

"_Because you all are worth saving. What the Templars were doing to you was wrong. We should have been helping you learn to use your magic, instead we treated you like you were a blight on the world. I am so sorry Tam. I never should have let this happen."_

"_It is not your fault. That mean lady she is the one to blame."_

"_Mean lady?"_

"_The one in the robes, she came to visit you right before we all left the Tower. She was twisted and ugly." I stared at the boy. The Divine was older than myself, but she was far from withered and ugly. Could he see something I could not?_

"_What did she look like Tam?"_

"_Her eyes glowed green and her skin was dark, bumpy. She had two horns coming out of the top of her head and her teeth were sharp and yellow. I always hid when she would come to the Tower. She frightened me." _

"_She can't do anything to you now Tam. I won't let her." The boy smiled and pointed over my head toward the moon. Small sparks of light began dancing around the glowing orb. The sparks shifted in color and looked like they were raining down on our heads. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I held out my hand and let the glowing dust land on my hand. It tingled a bit like someone was tickling me with a feather. Tam giggled and danced around catching the falling sparks. I laughed and continued to watch him play under the moon._

"_I have never met anyone as purehearted as that boy is." I jumped at the sound of Zander's voice. I was so enthralled by Tam I did not hear him walk up behind us._

"_Nor have I."_

"_The creature he described...it was a pride demon."_

"_He thinks the Divine is a pride demon?"_

"_Or possessed by one. Tam can see evil. He knew which of us would turn to blood magic and he also knew which Templars to avoid. He told me that only three of you were...how did he put it, nice. Two of which are here with us now."_

"_And the other?"_

"_You second in command. The one who brought me in. He did everything in his power not to hurt me when he caught me. I gave him every reason to beat me into submission, but he didn't."_

"_Justice was a very honorable man."_

"_Was?"_

"_I fear I sent him to his death. He was hunting a mage on my orders. He should have returned week before we left."_

"_Was it a blood mage he was after?" _

"_N...no, it was my sister." His eyes narrowed at me and I looked away. _

"_So you would put you own sister in the Circle? Is she a blood mage, a magister?"_

"_No, she...you would not understand." I saw Tam staring at me as tears started to run down my cheeks. His eye full of pity was all it took to bring me to my knees. I let the anguish take hold. I always thought Mercy was the monster, but now I see I am. I don't know how long a sobbed, but the feeling of little hands on my cheeks made my eyes snap open. Tam's hands were glowing again, but this time I felt the magic flow right through me. The tears stopped suddenly and the weight of my guilt began to ease._

"_If you were evil Commander this would not work. You need to forgive yourself." _

"_I don't know if I can Tam. I have done so many things that...this is why my sister is leading our people and not me. She was always the stronger of the two of us. I ran...she stood up to the Archon and I ran. I am no better than my father." _

"_Knight Commander what are you talking about?" Zander's voice was no longer angry, but concerned. He knelt next to me and met my gaze. _

"_I told you I was one of the Alamarri, what I did not tell you was a member of Andraste's family."_

"_So you are related to her, your sister and you are the only living relatives. Is that why she is leading your people?"_

"_We are the last of our family as far as I know. My brothers all died in the war. Mercy and I are...we are..." _

"_The daughters of Andraste." I raised my head to the sound of Sorn's voice and saw him standing with the other mages near the edge of the clearing. Kith was also there, but he already knew who I was. This was not a shock to him. "Mercy is the eldest and Drea is the youngest. Compassion and courage, her most prized children."_

"_Sorn, you can't be serious? She can't be Andraste's daughter."_

_'She can and she is. I was there the day of her birth. I was the one who helped her mother bring her into the world."_

"_Maker, does the Divine know who she is?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Why were you not in charge of the Chantry? How could you let someone else do this?" The anger had returned to Zander's voice. He gripped my shoulders and shook me. "If this was not your mother's plan the how in the name of the Maker did you let this happen?"_

"_I hated the magisters. They took my brothers from me, my mother. Seeing my sister use magic...I thought her no better then they are. They forced us to watch as one by one my mother's most trusted were burned. They saved her for last and laughed as she started to scream. I sat there crying and shaking like a coward, but my sister...she made the Archon put our mother out of her misery. It was her doing, not the compassion of the Archon. He would have watched my mother burn with no care that she suffered. When I saw what Mercy did I ran. I was never told she was a mage and I am her twin. I felt betrayed, so I ran. The Divine found me, took me in. I thought she was right in what we did. Mages were dangerous, they were susceptible to demon possession and had to be locked away for their own safety as well as the common people."_

"_And now?" I stood up then. I did not want to cower on the ground like a child. I looked every single one of the mages in the eye, praying they saw my sincerity._

"_Now I know I was very wrong. I swore to you I would keep you all safe from the Templars, I will keep that promise."_

"_If you are sincere Drea, I have a place we could go where they all will be safe." The old elf had a glint in his eye almost like he had been waiting for this._

"_Where?"_

"_If we head south instead of north up the Frostback's we will find a place called Haven. It is the last free town there is as far as any of us know. Mages are not shunned there and Andraste's true teachings are embraced."_

"_How do you know of this place Sorn?"_

"_Your sister told me of it. She found me in the Fade after she found out I was still alive. She...I never told her I was in the Circle, she just knew I was. We have kept in contact these past few months."_

"_Did you tell her I was with you?"_

"_No, I did not think it was wise. Drea even if you and she can not...it would still be safer for us and for you and Kith to take us there. You would be unburdened and we would be free."_

"_Then we head south come day break. I suggest you all go and get rest. I will keep watch for the night." Kith opened his mouth to argue, but I cut him off with a glare. He just sighed and followed the others back to the camp. Zander was the only one who stayed behind._

"_You need rest too Commander. I will keep watch."_

"_I am fine."_

"_The circles under your eyes tell me different and you are barely able to walk a straight line. I've watched you these past few months, you have barely eaten when we stop to make camp, you don't sleep the full night and you have neglected to tell myself or Sorn you are injured on more than one occasion. You are killing yourself, albeit slowly."_

"_I would think this would please you. The mighty Templar down on her knees weeping like a babe." _

"_I do not take pleasure in seeing someone in pain Drea." The sound of my name coming from his lips was strange, but I would have to say pleasant. "I know you and Kith have both risked everything to free us, keep us safe. Without either of you we would be dead."_

"_I doubt that, but I do thank you for the kind words. You are a strong leader Zander. I have seen the way they all listen to you, even Sorn. You don't need me or Kith."_

"_What if I do need you? What if I have come to respect you and your courage? You did not have to save us. You could have run and escaped on your own. It would have been far easier."_

"_My mother...she said that easy was never the right path. If it was easy all the time then we would forget to thrive. I wish she was here now. The Divine would never have been able to do what she has done if she was still here."_

"_It is up to you and your sister now to stop her."_

"_Perhaps, or just to Mercy. I...have already proven that I am not worthy."_

"_Go sleep." I know the look on my face was that of a child being scolded. He smiled at me and pushed me toward the camp. I gave in then, as my body screamed for rest._

"_For a few hours, wake me." He shook his head and laughed._

"_I will think about it."_

_OoO_

_We traveled for over a week south hampered by foul weather and steep terrain. I watched Kith carry young Tam on his back and had to smile. Tam had endeared himself to all of our hearts. Also in that week I had found Zander to be hovering closer to me. In the past week we had talked more than we had in the past six months. We mostly talked about my mother and the war. He tried a few times to bring up my sister, but I would always change the subject. Again today I found him at my side. _

"_Has Sorn told you how much farther we have to go?"_

"_He said it should be another three days travel up those mountains." I pointed to the set of rocky hills to the west._

"_Maker's breath, poor Kith will have to continue carrying Tam. The little boy's legs won't make it up those steep paths."_

"_I don't think he will mind. Kith is a strong man."_

"_I guess it helps you both took to wearing lighter armor too. The Templar armor looks like it weighs as much as a baby bronto." _

"_You have no idea." We continued to converse as we walked. Later we would forgive ourselves for not being more mindful of our surroundings. The first arrows struck both Zander and I from behind. I felt blinding pain in my thigh and saw Zander pitch forward with one in his side. My scream alerted the others and I saw Kith hand Tam off to one of the other mages before he was riddled with arrows. I turned and saw the Seekers closing in on us and screamed for the mages to run. Standing up on shaky feet I pulled my shield off my back and unsheathed my sword. I put myself between the Seekers and the retreating mages._

"_Surrender Knight Commander and we will spare you and the mages you have in your charge." The voice I knew was that of the Divine's highest ranking cleric. I let out a growl and shook my head._

"_We will not let you take them back to be abused. The Divine is not following the teachings of Andraste. She twisted them into her own will. If you come any closer I will kill you."_

"_The Divine knows these mages are controlling you Commander. She forgives you and wants you home."_

"_No one controls me! Not them and certainly not her!" The cleric let out a sigh and motioned to her men to take aim. _

"_I am sorry for this, but you leave me no choice." She turned to her men and ordered them to shoot us. "Maker have mercy on your soul Commander." I watched in horror as arrows sped by me and flew into the path behind me. Tam had refused to leave Kith's side and was trying to heal him. One of the arrows hit it's mark in the sweet boy's heart and he was dead before he hit the ground. Rage took over me. They had killed an innocent child, a boy who would not have ever hurt a soul. I charged them then with all the strength I had left. I saw Zander rise to his feet and flames wreathed his hands. He too had seen them kill Tam and something in him broke, as it had in me. I hacked and slammed my way through the first round of men. Zander hit the archers with a fire storm the like I had never seen. The smell of burnt flesh sickened me. The screams of the dying men triggered a memory of the death throws of my mother and her leaders. I froze for a second giving my foe a chance to take a swing. I felt the sword cut through my armor. I cursed and slammed my shield into the man's face. My side was bleeding profusely and I knew I had to drop the rest of them quick if the mages were to not going to survive._

"_Zander run!"_

"_No!"_

"_Dammit, do as I say. I will cover you retreat. Take care of the others. Now go!" I did not wait for him to answer and turned back to our attackers. I battled them until my arms felt like jelly and my vision blurred from the blood loss. I prayed that Zander and Zorn had been able to get the mages a safe distance. My time it seemed was up. My legs gave out and I fell to my back in the bloody snow. The cleric stood over me sneering._

"_I told her you were trouble. She will thank me for killing you myself. Time to join your mother." I began to laugh at the irony of it all. I had been the one who hunted people, just to become the hunted. The cleric raised her sword to strike me through the heart. I did not close my eyes, I wanted her to see the life leaving me. I don't know how to describe the look that passed over the woman's face. It was a mixture of fear, confusion and hate as a sword impaled her in the stomach. "Impossible!"_

"_You should make sure someone is dead before declaring victory." Kith was on his feet if only barely. The cleric fell to her knees and let out one last gurgling breath. Kith fell to the ground next to me and groaned. Tam had been able to heal some the the damage done by the arrows, but not much. "Can you walk?"_

"_I...I don't think so." I heard Kith laugh and then moan._

"_Laughing hurts, I always thought that my death would come at the hands of a mage, not one of our own."_

"_This is my fault, I should never have involved you."_

"_Drea I wanted to be here. It was worth it." I let my eyes close so the tears would not come. When I heard Kith's breathing get shallow I tried to get to my feet. I had to save him. I failed Tam, my mother, I would not fail him. Blinding pain threatened to bring me to my knees. I grit my teeth and tried to drag Kith up the path. I did not make it far. I fell over and screamed in pain and anguish. I did not care if I died here on this mountain, but I would be damned if I would let Kith pay for my mistakes. I looked down at my side and saw the blood flow was moving faster. My sight went black and I did not hear the voices shouting for me to hang on. I did not feel the hands on my side trying desperately to heal me. All I wanted was sweet oblivion. _

_OoO_

_The first thing I could remember feeling was warmth. My body felt like it was wrapped in warm linen. I felt no pain at all. My wound was gone or I was dead and it did not matter anymore. I did not want to open my eyes at all, I just wanted to stay in the warmth forever. Something or someone stirring broke through the cocoon like peace I was in. I felt a hand take mine to hold and I let my eyes slowly open. Warm hazel eyes greeted me as well as a familiar crooked smile. I tried to speak, but my throat was too dry. He placed his finger over my lips to quiet me._

"_Don't try to speak yet. I will have someone bring you water." I could not see who he had turned to nor did I care. I was grateful to be alive. My thought floated to what had happened then I remembered I was not alone when I was injured. I tried to sit up out of the bed, but Zander held me back. "Don't your not strong enough yet. We are safe here." The person behind him handed him a water skin and he slowly let me drink. Once I was sure my throat was quenched I tried again to talk._

"_Where?"_

"_Haven, the villagers were waiting for us not to much farther up the path. We ran right into them when we tried to escape the Seekers."_

"_Kith?" Zander smiled and shook his head. He helped me up to a sitting position and pointed to a bed along the far wall. There lay Kith, still breathing and healed._

"_He needs more rest and another bout of healing to get him to his feet, but he will make it." I looked to the other bed in the room and saw a small body outlined with a sheet. I could not help the sob that broke from me. I felt Zander put his arms around my shoulders and pull me to him. "Tam is gone."_

"_I know...it isn't fair that one so young should die like that. He deserved so much better."_

"_He is at the Maker's side now and knows no pain. I envy him in a way. He does not have to face the darkness that lays ahead." I could only nod. He was right, but it still hurt to see the small body laying there lifeless when there had been such a wonderful spirit in the boy. "Sorn will be happy to know your awake. He has been worried."_

"_Where is he?"_

"_He went with the woman who look oddly just like you." I stiffened in his embrace then. "She too was worried as was Justice." _

"_Justice! He...she did not kill him?"_

"_Looks like she didn't. Unless she can make corpses walk and talk." A booming laughter came from the door way and craned my head to peek around Zander's shoulder. There in the doorway stood Justice. I tried to get to my feet, but my legs gave out on me. Zander held me up and put my back in the bed. Justice clucked his tongue and stepped in the room._

"_Always was a stubborn woman." Zander laughed._

"_I can tell."_

"_Justice, what happened?" I listened as he told me all of what had happened in the months since I sent him after my sister. Zander had left us to fetch some food for me and I was grateful. My stomach almost drowned out Justice's low booming voice. I continued to listen and looked him over. It was then I noticed the armor. So much like the armor we both wore in the order, but the sword was facing the wrong way. I let my hand reach out to trace the etching and Justice stopped talking. "Where did you get this?"_

"_It was made for me here in Haven."_

"_Your here willingly?"_

"_At first...no, but my eyes have been opened Drea. Mages are not evil by nature. Magic is not a sin. It is a test from the Maker for both sides, those who have it and those who do not."_

"_She got to you didn't she?" The slow blush that crept up his neck told me all I needed to know. Justice had fallen in love with my sister and that is why he had stayed. "Where is she?"_

"_She went with a few others to get supplies from the dwarves. She will return in a few days hopefully."_

"_Who is in charge while she is gone?" _

"_I am in charge of the defenses here, Havard runs the Chantry and the day to day of the village while Mercy is gone. Most of the people here were under your mother's leadership before...they look to Mercy to be her, but she not. It weighs heavy on her all these lives under her care."_

"_Just as it did my mother and myself."_

"_Once you and Kith are strong enough there is something I have to show you."_

"_What is it?" Zander walked back in with a tray of food and Justice rose from where he had been sitting on the bed._

"_When you are stronger. I have a few things I have to take care of . You need to rest." He turned to Zander and whispered something to him. I saw the mage nod and look back at me. "I will be back to check on you in a while." I watched him walk out of the room and I slumped back into the bed. He had changed so much in these months away from the order. He looked happier, younger even than I remembered. The smell of fresh baked bread and a savory soup pulled me out of my thoughts. My stomach gave one more growl as Zander started to help me eat. It would be days before either Kith or I was strong enough to take the journey up the mountain that Justice had planned for us. I was not prepared for what lay ahead. Looking back I don't think I ever would have been ready for what I saw, what I went through._

_OoO_

_We traveled up the mountain three days later till we reached the summit. Seeing the stone temple up here made me uneasy, but I did not let it show. Kith stood at my side and Zander as well. I asked Justice numerous times what we were doing up here, but he told me I would see when we got there. The closer to the temple we walked the more I wanted to run screaming. Dread filled me and I had to will my legs to move me forward. I had been a coward once to many in my life. I did not want to stay that way anymore. I felt a hand take mine and looked up into hazel colored eyes. Zander walked beside me, a concerned look upon his face._

"_Are you alright?"_

"_Yes, just a bit weak still."_

"_We don't have to do this, we could wait til you are well again." I shook my head and gave his hand a light squeeze._

"_I can't keep running away from things. I have to see this through." We walked in silence the rest of the way. Once we were inside Justice finally told us what we were to do. _

"_This is called the Gauntlet. It tests the faithful to measure their worth." Kith shifted his weigh uncomfortably._

"_What will we face?"_

"_This place will test your knowledge of Andraste, your regret, and your trust in one another. I will be here waiting for you to return."_

"_What if we aren't worthy?"_

"_Then Kith you will not be able to go further." Zander stepped forward and scowled at Justice._

"_Drea is in no condition to fight anything, neither is Kith. I will not let them do this if there is danger." Justice cocked his head to the side and smirked._

"_That is why you are here mage. You will be there to protect them with your magic and heal them if the need arises. This is as much a test for you as it is for them. You do not trust them anymore then they trust you."_

"_Trust is a hard thing to come by, when all you have ever known is lies and pain."_

"_You are free now, here you are not shunned or owned. You can work your magic openly."_

"_This coming from the man who hauled my into the Circle. Who told me if I stepped out of line he would kill me without remorse. What changed?"_

"_I changed, I let what happen to my family taint my views of people, mage or otherwise. I trusted almost no one and hated mages."_

"_What happened to your family?"_

"_A blood mage slaughtered them. I was away hunting in the woods, I came home to find him bleeding the life out of my youngest sister. The rest of my family already dead. I killed him, but the hatred did not ebb. When the Chantry took me in I jumped at the chance to hunt mages when it was offered to me. Now I look back and see I was blaming all mages for the action of just one. It is not a just way to live. This test opened my eyes, made me face my own guilt and pain. I came out the other side cleansed. I offer this to all of you, a chance to shake the weight of the lies we all have been living under." I stepped forward and walked to the door. Kith and Zander hurried to follow. _

_We made it through the riddles with little trouble. All of the specters asking the questions I knew in my youth. The next test hurt me more than I thought anything ever could. It was a vision of a person who you have failed, at least that is what it was for me. When I saw the figure standing at the end of the dark hallway I wanted to curl into a ball and never move again. I had thought it to be my mother, but it was not. It was Mercy. I ran to her and wanted nothing more than to beg her forgiveness, but when I got to her I could see she was not really there. It was a illusion of her, but it was more than that. She smiled at me and I could feel her love for me, her forgiveness._

"_The last time we stood before each other we fought sister."_

"_I...Mercy..."_

"_Hush, I was never angry with you. To me there was nothing to forgive Drea. You have to forgive yourself."_

"_I ran...I failed our mother, but you...you spared her the pain of burning to death. You stepped forward and had the courage to fight the Archon. I am a coward." _

"_No you are not. You are braver than anyone I have ever known Drea. You knew that the Divine was twisting our mother's words. You had the courage to free the mages under your care and protect them. You covered their escape while you fought the very people who would have killed them. If that does not show courage, then I don't know hat will. We are sisters, you and I share a bond that not even the Maker himself can break. I have missed you more than you will even know. We will see each other very soon. I have so much to tell you, so much to show you. For now you must move on though." I watched her fade away, a warm smile still on her lips. When my vision cleared I saw Kith and Zander standing not far from me with sad expressions on their faces._

"_Can you two continue or would you like a few minutes?" Zander shook his head to clear it and Kith closed his eyes._

"_We just need a moment." I nodded and tried to shake off the feelings my vision had brought to light in me. Once we were ready we continued. The next room had us fighting shadows of ourselves. My limbs screamed at me as I tried to swing my sword. The shadow of me knocked me to my knees and I barely had time to block her swing. A bolt of lightning shot over my head and hit my shadow square in the chest. I heard it yelp and fall over shaking. I looked over my shoulder and saw Zander with his hands out. Magic wreathed his hands and he let another bolt fly at the shadow. It gave one last shake before disappearing. I yelled out a warning before the shadow of Kith hit him from behind. I rose to my feet and ran at the shadow even as my muscles protested the strain. I let out a growl and ran the shadow through. It fell to it's knees and with a grunt I cleaved his head from his shoulders._

"_Zander?" I held out my hand and lifted him to his feet._

"_Maker that hurt. Wait where is Kith?" We both turned to see Kith fighting the shadow of Zander. I had to admire his fortitude, but he too was not fully healed. Zander placed a arcane shield in front of Kith blocking the fire ball that was thrown at him. I charged, slamming my shield into the shadow. I stood over the apparition and stabbed downward into it's heart. I did not want to use my cleansing powers just in case any of us needed healing. "Anyone need healing?"_

"_Commander, thank you." _

"_Your very welcome Kith, but thank Zander too. His magic saved you from that fire ball." _

"_You have my gratitude ser mage. What else will this place throw at us?" None of us wanted to answer that. Zander checked Kith over making sure he was alright then came to me. His hands glowed with healing magic and I sighed as it washed over my body. _

"_This is the second time you have risked your life to save mine. I am starting to think you are starting to become fond of me." I felt my cheeks burn and I looked away from him. _

"_I promised to keep you safe remember. I keep my promises." His hand cupped my chin and forced me to look up at him. His eyes searched mine. "Zander..." His lips cut off my words and I melted into him, even with my armor on. He broke the kiss and caressed my face._

"_It is more than that and you know it." I sighed and nodded. "We still have a way to go and we should not dally here."_

"_Yes. Kith are you ready?" I heard a small chuckle from my Knight Lieutenant._

"_I could go into the next room if you two what some privacy."_

"_Kith!" _

"_Sorry Commander." We pressed on and came to the puzzle bridge. It took a few moments, but Kith figured out how to work it. The last test was the flames. To honor the others' modesty we decided to go one at a time. Kith went first, then Zander and I went last. I entered the room and saw the flames halving the room. I undressed and placed my armor on the alter. I took a deep breath and walked through the flames. Once on the other side I ascended the stairs and knelt in front of my mother's urn. Justice did warn me what lay at the end. I closed my eyes and prayed. I asked my mother for forgiveness, I prayed to the Maker to take away my fear. I heard footsteps coming from behind me and I rose to my feet._

"_The statue does not do her justice." I turned to find my sister standing at bottom of the stairs._

"_Are you real or just another illusion?" She let out a laugh and walked up to my side. Her hand landed on my forearm letting me know she was very real._

"_I am as real as you are Drea." I fell apart then. I did not care that I was naked, but my sister took her cloak and wrapped it around me. I began to sob openly, letting all my grief flow away. Mercy embraced me and my sobs became louder. "I told you I forgave you, please don't cry."_

"_Wait...that was you in the hall?"_

"_A projection of me, yes. I was afraid to face you till I knew you were ready to see me."_

"_You were afraid of me?"_

"_I was afraid we would fight again. I do not want to fight you Drea. Your my sister, I love you and want no harm to come to you."_

"_I...Mercy I am sorry. I was wrong to hate you, wrong to let them hunt mages. Maker, I taught them how to combat magic. This is all my fault."_

"_No it is the work of a demon. You are not to blame. Now that you are here I hope we can work together to stop her." _

"_There is nothing in this world I would like more." She smiled at me and gave me a hard squeeze before walking back to the alter. The fire parted for her and let her pass with no hindrance. When she returned she handed me my clothing and I dressed quickly. I left my armor off and only put on my linen shirt and doe skin trousers. "Thank you for sparing Justice."_

"_He is a good man. I don't know what I would have done without his skills these past months. The winters here are brutal."_

"_He loves you, you know that right?"_

"_And I love him." We slipped into a comfortable silence standing hand in hand looking at our mother's resting place. I leaned my head on Mercy's shoulder something I use to do when we were children. She was the oldest, if only by minutes, but she was still much wiser and stronger than myself. _

"_This is a sight I have prayed to see, my strong girls together again." We both spun around and then fell to our knees. There behind us was our mother standing in all her glory. He kind smile graced her lips and she reached out to touch both of our hands. "I am so sorry my little ones. This is not the future I wanted for you." Neither of us could speak. We just stared at our mother and enjoyed having her with us again. Both of us knowing it would not last. Our mother talked to us for hours soothing the hurt we both had felt since her death. Her last words are what stuck with me the most. "The demon who holds the Divine is very old. Her power is greater than any of the other of her kind."_

"_What kind of demon is she?"_

"_Pride. She calls herself Strife. It is not known to me what spirit she was before her fall. It does not matter now. She hates mortals and hates the Maker even more. She wants to create misery and discord."_

"_How can we combat her when she has a bloody army on her side?"_

"_When the virtues stand up against her as one she will not be able to stand. Purity must be protected or all hope is lost. Compassion for one's enemy is the greatest gift one can give in seeking justice. Courage and fortitude are needed to show one's valor in the darkest of times. Above all else faith is needed. Faith in yourself, your allies and the Maker himself. This is the only way to defeat Strife."_

_Looking back I know now my mother was trying to tell us something, but at the time Mercy and I thought is was just more of her preaching. When the embodiments of the virtues are all present together we have a chance to defeat Strife. Tam was purity in it's greatest form, for who is more pure than a child. Mercy was compassion. Forgiving even her greatest enemy and granting them mercy from her wrath. Justice, well he was what he was named. With those three dead there is no hope for us to beat the Divine now. I can only pray that time will give us back those who can take up these virtues. Losing my sister, Justice and Tam has broken my heart. I thank the Maker for Zander during this past decade of my life. He has shown me what it is to love and trust. Together we have made the greatest gift anyone could ask for a child. I pray her life will not be one of pain and battles, but is of hopes and joys. It kills me to leave them behind, but I must try to stop Strife. I finally know what I am, who I am. I am no longer afraid of failing._

_I pray whom ever reads these will find them when the world is free of the influence of Strife and her followers. Pity those fooled by her and pray for their souls. Know that the Maker has not truly turned from the world, he just waits to see if we will turn to him again. Though evil, Strife is too one of his children and he loves us all no matter what we do. _

**Holy Maker! This chapter so got away from me while I was writing it. Please don't shoot me, I know it is long as hell. So concludes the travel into the past and know I can bring us back to Anders and Leigh. Thank all of you for sticking with me this far even after this novel of a chapter. To all my new followers, reviewers and readers thank you so much and to my steadfast fans much love too. I promise that the next chapter will be no where near as long and have out heroes in it. Okay back to writing I go and hopefully it won't take me another month or more to get the next chapter out. **

**Raven**


	49. Chapter 49

Sebastian laid down the parchment and rubbed his tired eyes. He had spent the entire night reading the scrolls Elthina had given him. He felt lost, learning all he had even known was a lie. His stomach turned at the thought of what Andraste's daughters endured. The scrolls did not say what had happened to Drea, but he had a feeling she died too young. With a sigh he stretched and went to his window. The sky was just turning pink as the morning sun began to rise. The soft sound of footsteps echoed in his quiet room and he turned to meet their maker.

"Have you not slept child?" Elthina gave him a motherly look and it made him smile. He never thought he would see that smile again. He spent the last few years hating Anders for what he thought was outright murder only to find out the man had only destroyed a building. The Wardens had saved all the faithful and kept them safe.

"I read all the scrolls."

"What are your thoughts on what you read?"

"It is hard to believe."

"I know my dear boy. I, like you was taught that this was real and what was written there was never true. If I had not spoken to the eldest daughter of Andraste myself I would not have believed either." Sebastian balked at the older woman's words.

"How...how could you have talked to her? She has been dead for...over a thousand years."

"She has become a spirit of Compassion. The Maker granted those who stayed true to what Andraste taught a special place in the Fade. She and seven others like her became the virtues most people strive for." Sebastian rubbed the bridge of his nose and sat back down. Elthina took a seat next to him and waited for his next question."

"The spirit...she...she follows Leigh in the Fade, doesn't she?"

"She is Leigh Hawke's protector. How much has Hawke told you?"

"Very little. She said she was born a mage and hid that fact from the world."

"That is partly true, she was bound because her magic was too strong at a young age."

"Like Meghan?"

"Very much like your daughter, but Leigh did not have anyone strong enough to teach her to control her magic. A mage like that, the Templars are charged to outright kill." Grief twisted Sebastian's face thinking about his sweet little girl being butchered just for having magic. He understood now he had been such a fool for all those years harping on Anders and Merrill. "Meghan is loved and protected Sebastian. No harm will come to her."

"I fear I will never get to see her in the flesh, that the only time I can hold my daughter is when I dream."

"I know this is hard on you, but she is safer in Ferelden. Queen Ashlyn is making sure she stays that way."

"Ashlyn?"

"She has been one of the voices that has been most outspoken against the imprisonment of mages. She and King Alistair were the ones to change the laws at least in Ferelden stating mages could not have any visits from family. Now mages there are free to live as they choose."

"The Divine wants to invade Ferelden." Elthina nodded somberly and stood up to look out the window. "She wants my support and my men."

"What did you tell her?"

"I said no. My people have been through enough."

"Yes they have. I fear they will go through more, as will we all. If the Chantry gets it's hands on Hawke all of this, all of us will be under the rule of a demon."

"Maker's mercy."

"It will take his mercy for this to work. All our hopes rest on the shoulders of one woman and her abilities to stay alive." Sebastian took one last look at the rising sun and hoped that wherever Leigh was she was safe.

OoO

Anders woke with a jolt and hissed. The pain in his arm throbbed like a mocking heartbeat. It had been over a week since he and Leigh had to run from the Seekers and now he was alone. They had been blindsided by a small group of Templars and in the fray he had taken an arrow in his bicep. Warm hands caressed his face and he eased himself back down to the cave floor. Leigh had busied herself making a poultice to place on the wound. She dared not use magic just in case the Seekers were close by.

"Where are we?" Leigh turned back and gave her husband a sad smile.

"The border of Starkhaven and Kirkwall. They are guarding most of the roads and through ways. I'm not sure if we will be able to return home the way we came here." Anders grimaced as she placed the herbal concoction on his wound. "Your running a fever."

"How bad?"

"Bad enough for me to worry." He could see fear in her eyes for the first time in a very long time.

"We will have to chance using magic then. I am no good to you like this and if we have to fight..."

"I know love." The soothing feeling of healing magic coursed through him and Anders let out a weary sigh. "Better?"

"Much, how long was I asleep?"

"Half a day, It is mid morning now. Hopefully we can make a run for it at nightfall. If we can get back to Sebastian we might have a chance of eluding the Seekers."

"Oh I bet he will be so pleased to see us again." Leigh rolled her eyes at her husband, but knew he was right. It had been tense when they all had met again. Sebastian was civil, but Pash warned her of some underlying anger on the prince's part. In a perfect world Meghan would be able to see her father in person, but they did not live in a perfect world. Leigh knew how much it killed Sebastian that Anders was raising his child, that Meghan calls the mage Da and not him. "Love, you look like your far away again."

"Just thinking."

"We will make it love, we will stop all this." Leigh leaned back against his chest and nodded. She waved her hand toward the cave entrance and made an illusion to hide them. She needed sleep, her body ached and her head was spinning. "Sleep Dove, I will keep watch."

"Wake me before nightfall."

"I will."

OoO

Miranda Amell sat in a dark damp cell. She had been caught by the Seekers while trying to pass messages to one of their many safe houses. The Templars took her back to the Orlais, to the Grand Cathedral. She had been waiting for days for someone to come and at least feed her. She shivered and tried to pull her torn robes up around her better. The clank of armor made her jump and she curled up into a ball.

"Get up mage! Someone wants to meet you." Miranda rose to her feet and shuffled to the cell door. Her feet were blistered from walking without shoes for days and she hissed with every step. "Come on I haven't got all day." Miranda kept her mouth shut and tried to move faster. Once she was out of the cell the Templar grabbed her arm and led her to room with a chair in the center of it. "Sit down." She complied and waited. She heard the Templar leave and the door shut behind him. The room was bare and cold. Hunger ate at her gut and her lips were cracked and dry. The door opened a short time later and a woman in white walked in.

"My, my you look dreadful my dear." Miranda could only stare at the woman. "Did the Templars cut out your tongue? Do you know who I am?"

"You are the Divine."

"Ah so you do have a voice."

"Only when the person is worth speaking to."

"Cheeky little mage, are we?" Miranda knew her life would be ending soon, so why hold back.

"We both know you are going to kill me or make me Tranquil. Just give it over with. I have nothing to say to you or anyone else for that matter."

"Oh but I think you do Miranda. I think you know many things and are just bursting to tell someone."

"No I pretty sure I have nothing to say." The Divine smiled and leaned closer to the beaten mage. She placed her hand on the woman's shoulder and squeezed. A blaze of pain shot right through Miranda and she stifled a scream.

"I can make this stop. I can give you your freedom. All you have to do is let me in. I can read your mind and you will not guilty of spilling your friends' secrets." Miranda shook her head and gritted her teeth. "It does not have to be this way. I will not let your resistance take what is mine. If you just give in you will be rewarded. I can give you whatever you want."

"I'd rather be turned into an abomination than give you anything." A low cruel laugh echoed off the walls. Miranda gasped seeing the Divine's eyes change to that of a demon's.

"I think I can arrange that. At least that way I can get what I want and you will serve me."

"They will stop you! They know what you are. Your rule is done."

"I have ruled over Thedas for over a thousand years. No upstart from Ferelden will stop me. Your Hawke will be found and her head will adorn the front gate of this cathedral. I am the Divine! I am the Maker's chosen, his voice, his first child. You and your kind will bend to my will. I will make Thedas like it was again, but this time the mages will be collared like the Qunari do to their mages."

"There are more of us now then there are of you, we have tasted freedom and will not give it up."

"I admire your courage mage." The Divine walked to the door and called for the Templars. "Take her to the chamber." Miranda growled at the Templar who came to move her from the room. She fought against his grip and tried to cast a spell, but her magic was drained. Fear crept into her. Since the start of Leigh leading the mages Miranda and she had set aside whatever animosity the two had. They had talked for hours seeing that they were not so different for each other. Miranda had even helped with teaching Meghan some forms of magic. She prayer whatever the Divine had in store for her that she did not end up betraying her cousin.

OoO

Anders woke Leigh as the sun began to set. He wanted to give her more time, but knew the longer they stayed put the better the chance the Seekers had to find them. Leigh went out to scout while Anders made sure they had all their supplies. They had used most of the herbs for healing in the last few days and their waterskins needed filling. He hoped it did not take them long to get back to Starkhaven's castle. Leigh's hand on his shoulder made Anders tense, but he had come to expect her sneakiness.

"The coast is clear, we need to move carefully."

"Lead the way love." They moved under the cover of darkness only stopping to rest when the sun was up. Anders thanked the Maker he still had his dark sight as they raced over the darkened country side. It was fall time and the air was crisp, but not enough to make it uncomfortable. His worry was for Leigh who was looking tired. She barely slept when they stopped and their food was gone. When she tried to hunt she barely missed being seen be a group of Templars. "How much further do you think?"

"A day, maybe a little more." Sitting next to her he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close.

"You need rest Leigh." She sighed and shook her head.

"Not till I know we are safe and heading home."

"Leigh, you can't keep this pace up much longer."

"I distinctly remember telling you the same thing years ago." Anders could not help but smile.

"I was a fool then, I should have listened to you."

"You're only saying that to get me to sleep."

"Maybe, but it's true. Please try at least." Leigh closed her eyes and nestled herself deeper into his arms.

"I'll try."

"Good, I will wake you before dark." She did not hear his last words as sleep took her over. She had tried so hard to be strong and keep going. All the years they had spent together she was almost always the strong one, but since the death of Vengeance, Anders had come into his own. He had handled so much while she had been pregnant with the twins and later Drea. He led the Resistance in her stead when she had to stay hidden for fear of someone using her children against her. Over the passed few years Anders had become the man she knew he could be. It gave her hope that they would win this war. She drifted into the Fade and found her safe haven. A bell like giggle made her heart soar. She could feel Meghan's bright presence through the air of the Fade.

"Mummy!" Leigh spun around and knelt down to catch her daughter. "Where's Da?"

"He is awake right now sweetheart. Mummy needed to sleep."

"We miss you." Leigh had to cover her mouth to stop the sobbing that threatened to break from her lips. Tears welled in her eyes and she hugged her little girl close to her.

"Oh my little angel I miss you all so much. We are trying to get home to you." Meghan wiggled in her mother's grasp and pulled away.

"Auntie Beth taught me new magic."

"Show me." The little auburn haired girl stood a few feet from her mother and began weaving a spell. Suddenly a bright light rose over the girl's head and illuminated the ground around them.

"Now I won't be scared of the dark." Leigh smiled and picked her daughter up.

"No my little girl you won't. I am so very proud of you." Leigh sat there with Meghan for the rest of her time in the Fade. It amazed her how fast the girl learned new spells. She wondered if this how her father felt when he had watched her all those years ago. Pash watched from a distance her mind else where. She felt the ripples in the Fade of Strife using her magic. The demon was getting desperate and the time was coming for Leigh to make her move, but all the pieces had to fall into place or they would fail. Maker knew when they would have this strong a leader again. "Pash?"

"The time is drawing nearer. I think the Divine is getting ready to show us her hand." Leigh sank down next to her spirit friend and watched Meghan playing with Hope.

"I can feel it too. The pang of dark magic."

"You are far stronger than I had ever hoped you'd be when I first met you."

"So you were waiting for me?"

"In a way. Since losing my sister I have waited for someone who had all the virtues that our father holds dear. You have shown all of them in your life time. You have never given in to despair or hatred. You are what the Maker wanted in his mortal children."

"I had good teachers along the way. My father, mother, you, I have been lucky." Pash patted Leigh's hands.

"Luck is always good."

"When this is over and the Divine is gone...what will you do?"

"I don't know. I am a part of you till you return to the Fade for your eternal rest. I guess I will return to the Golden City...or maybe Justice and I will continue to roam the Fade helping those who still need us. What of you, what will you do when this is over?"

"If I survive it? I think Anders and I will find a nice piece of land and build a house. Live out our lives simply. I think we will have earned it."

"In more ways than one." Pash looked up at the sky and sighed. "Anders will be waking you soon. Go say your goodbyes to Meghan." Leigh jumped to her feet and went to her daughter.

"I have to go sweetheart. Be good for your Aunt and Uncle. Tell Karl and Drea I love all of you. Da and I will be home soon."

"Bye Mummy." Leigh kissed her child's forehead as she faded away. She woke feeling Anders shake her softly.

"Sorry love, but it is almost dark." Leigh stretched her arms over her head and arched her back.

"Our daughter wanted me to tell you she misses you and wants us home." Anders grinned and helped Leigh off of their bedroll.

"I miss them all very much."

"So do I." Leigh rolled up their bedroll and secured it to their pack. "We need to hurry and get back to Ferelden. The Divine is working dark magic and I think it is coming to the time to face her."

"Maker."

"We can do this Anders. She won't win this time." Leigh held out her hand and Anders laced his fingers in hers.

OoO

"Sebastian?"

"In here Kali." Kali found her soon to be husband standing in the castle's Chantry. He was staring at the statue of Andraste and looked deep in thought. She stepped up to his side and took his hand. "I received word that the Divine has declared all out war on Ferelden."

"Maker's mercy...she is insane."

"Aye, and she has threatened anyone who tries to help the enemy will know the wrath of the Chantry." Kali let out a long breath and turned to her love.

"What are we going to do?"

"I have called a meeting of the people. I want their voices heard. Ferelden aided us when we needed it the most. I am a man of honor, I will not let Ferelden stand alone." Kali gazed up into Sebastian's blue eyes and smiled warmly.

"Then we'd better send the word out. I have a feeling Kirkwall will stand with Ferelden also and with both of us in the Marches at the ready the Divine will not be able to use the Amaranthine Sea."

"My thoughts exactly. I also have sent word to Antiva and Rivain asking for assistance. I have a few favors to cash in with nobles there."

"Maybe if we all stand up to her she will see reason. She will stop this needless fight."

"From your lips to the Maker's ears. I will go and have the guard gather our people. Please make sure Elthina is comfortable."

"I will join you in the main hall in an hour." Before Kali could leave the Chantry Sebastian's steward rushed through the door.

"I am sorry to interrupt my lord, but..." The man looked scared and was shaking.

"What is wrong?"

"There are two Templars here to see you my prince. They are waiting for you in the throne room. They...they are covered in blood." Kali looked up at Sebastian and saw the worry in his eyes.

"I will go meet with them. Take this to the guards and have them gather our people at the inn. I will be along shortly."

"Yes, my prince." Kali slipped her hand in Sebastian's.

"I am going with you. Just give me a moment to get my sword."

"Kali..."

"I will not let you meet with them alone. Who knows what they have done or will do. Just wait a moment." He nodded and waited for her in the hall. She returned quickly with her sword strapped to her side. Sebastian made the short walk to the throne room. When he opened the doors he saw the Templars standing close together talking quietly. The sight of a golden mage staff made Sebastian stop dead. He had seen that same staff over a week earlier strapped to the back of Anders. Dread filled the prince. Could it be they had caught Anders? If so where was Hawke? Did they get her too?

"My steward said you wanted to speak with me." The smaller Templar stepped forward followed closely by the taller one. Their helms hide their faces, unnerving the normally stout hearted prince. Kali slid herself between the Templars and Sebastian. She had her sword at the ready and glared at the armored warriors.

"Not another step more till you speak your purpose." The smaller Templar laughed a bit and held up their hands.

"My, she reminds me of Aveline. We mean no harm and apologize for the deception, but we had no other way to avoid the Templars." Leigh took her helm off and Anders followed suit. "The Seekers have been on her tails since we left here. We had no other choice." Sebastian rushed forward and gave Leigh a crushing hug.

"I thought when I saw the staff they had killed you both."

"We are fine more or less."

"Speak for yourself love, I am exhausted and starving." Leigh let out a laugh at her husband and shook her head.

"I will have food brought for you, as well as a bath drawn and new clothes."

"Thank you. We don't want to burden you too long though. We need to get home, but the Templars have closed off most of the roads and throughways. Varric is probably a wreck by now."

"I think I have an idea, but it will have to wait til after I meet with the people of Starkhaven. The Divine is ordering all of Thedas to move against Ferelden. She wants to quell the rebellion."

"She bloody mad. Does she not know most of Thedas is now against her?"

"She still thinks she has the power to rule over everything Anders. She had threatened to bring the full might of the Chantry to anyone that helps Ferelden." Leigh bit her lip and paced the floor. "Hawke I will not let Ferelden stand alone and you know Aveline will have Kirkwall throw it's lot in with yours. I have missives sent to allies in Antiva and Rivain. Tevinter had already stated they will fight against her, she is out numbered."

"Sebastian, your people have already had enough of war...I can't ask you to do this."

"You don't have to. I am asking my people for their help, but will understand if they chose to stay out of it. I...might have to put someone in charge in my stead, but I will not stand by as that demon threatens the life of my daughter or my friends."

"What Sebastian is trying to say is both he and I want to join your cause and stop the Divine. I am the daughter of mages. I owe it to my father to fight to see he is free." Leigh beamed at both of them.

"You both are most welcome to join us." Anders held out his hand to Sebastian and the prince took his in kind.

"Never thought you would get passed your righteousness."

"Or you getting passed your vengeance." Both men laughed and shook hands. "We both have people to protect Anders. Two of them happen to be loved by both of us."

"You mean we actually agree for once? Will wonders never cease."

"You're such an ass Anders."

"Choir Boy you have no idea. You never met the me before Justice. I would have given your rakish ways a run for their money."

"Maker help us all." Leigh and Kali could only shake their heads and led their men out of the throne room. There was much to talk about, much to plan. The winds were shifting and they all knew Thedas was on the brink of change. They all hoped it was the change that brought freedom from the Divine's tyranny.


	50. Chapter 50

Sebastian felt his stomach lurch again. The week at sea had not been kind to Isabela's ship. Twice they had hit bad weather and it did not look like it was going to get any better. He sighed and pulled himself out of the bunk he was lying in. Nothing he seemed to do helped the seasickness.

"Maker I hate traveling by ship." A soft giggle made him open his eyes. Leigh was leaning against the door jam. "Hawke, how can you stand this rocking?"

"I have been traveling by ship for years now...plus Anders is very good at curing seasickness. I wish you would let him help you. You would be far less miserable."

"You think I am being stubborn?" She pushed herself off the doorway and crossed the small cabin to sit next to him. Her hands moved slowly and began to glow. "What...?"

"Just hush for a moment. I might not be as gifted as my dear husband, but I can at least take the edge off." The prince's blue eyes went wide, but the queasy feeling began to lessen. "Is that any better?"

"Aye, thank you." Leigh sat next to him in silence for a few moments.

"Sebastian...when we get to Ferelden..."

"I want to see my daughter. Do I not have the right?"

"You do have the right, but I wanted to warn you of a few things. Meghan is a mage and she still is learning to control her magic. If she gets startled or upset sometimes her spells go awry."

"Why would she be upset that I am there?" Leigh buried her face in her hands and rubbed her temples.

"She knows you only in the Fade. Seeing people in the flesh is different. She is a shy girl."

"I have told her that I am her father."

"I know, but she also thinks Anders is her father...I don't want you getting upset if she does not warm up to you right away."

"I can't promise that. I should have been in her life long before now. I am not happy that Anders...that he has gotten to see her, hold her, raise her. I have missed so much."

"If I could change it I would, but at the time you wanted to kill both of us. I never wanted to hurt you Sebastian." The prince gently squeezed Leigh's hand and used the other to lift her chin up to look her in the eye.

"I know, it is just...I find myself jealous of the man all over again. He has seen her first smile, heard her first words."

"I...Sebastian I am so sorry. I never wanted it to be like this."

"I don't think either of us wanted this. Tell me one thing, does he treat her like his children or..."

"He loves her Sebastian. When she was a baby he was the only one she would calm for, the only one she wanted to hold her most of the time. They have a connection that I will never understand."

"But you are like her."

"She is a healer like Anders and Bethany. I am a destroyer. Fire, ice, stone and lightning those are my specialties."

"Anders can destroy things as well or did you forget the explosion at the Chantry." Leigh sighed and shook her head.

"He had to use a combination of ingredients to make that explosion. I can do it without help if I put my mind to it. Meghan has the ability to heal almost anything, even the Blight. Her magic is the purest I have ever seen. I know you have seen her work magic in the Fade, but to see it in person...Maker it is breathtaking." Sebastian smiled seeing the joy on Leigh's face talking about their daughter. "I should let you try to get some rest. We still a at least three more days before we hit land. If you feel sick again come find me I will try to ease it again."

"Thank you." Leigh nodded and took her leave. She made her way through the cramped halls of Isabela's ship to her room. She found Anders sitting on the cot. He was reading over scraps of parchment and did not notice his wife standing only a few feet from him. His brow was furrowed deeply and she could hear his teeth grinding.

"Bad news?"

"This is from one of our spies in Orlais, it says Miranda never made it to the safe house. Neither did the others with her." Leigh felt her eyes begin to sting and she lowered herself to the cabin floor. She and her cousin had a less then friendly relationship in the beginning, but over the last year they had become friends. Miranda had been a great help with Meghan and her training. To think she was gone made Leigh's heart ache. Anders rose from their cot and sat himself next to his wife. His arm wrapped around her and pulled her close. "I'm sorry love."

"We all knew this war would have it's share of casualties...I never thought she would be one of them."

"Neither did I." Both sat on the ground in silence for a while. There was no words to take the hurt away and neither of them wanted to try.

OoO

Carver paced the dock waiting for his sister's return. He had not been in Denerim at the time Leigh decided to go to Starkhaven. If he had been, he never would have let her go. Even with Anders going along with her it was dangerous. Carver did not trust the Prince of Starkhaven, but he was not sure if it was just his over protectiveness towards his sisters or if the prince was untrustworthy. Bethany watched her brother pace and sighed. She wanted her older sister back home too, but she understood why Leigh left.

"Carver you are going to wear a rut into the wood if you keep pacing." Carver let out a low snarl, but came and sat by his twin's side. "She will be here soon."

"She never should have gone in the first place. What in the name of the Maker was she thinking? She has children now, a family that needs her, she can't keep running off and save the world." Bethany let out a small giggle as her brother gave her a sour look. "It's not funny Beth."

"I seem to remember years ago you use to wish she would just go away so you did not have to live in her shadow anymore. Now you want her around. My how things have changed."

"Well thinking both of you were dead changes a person. I missed so much while I was here and you two were in Kirkwall. I don't want to lose anymore family. It's bad enough Miranda..." Bethany nodded somberly and took her brother's hand. She raised her eyes to the horizon and spotted a dark shape heading in their direction.

"Carver look!" Carver jumped off the crate he and Bethany had been sitting on. It took the ship a good twenty minutes to make it to the dock, but once they saw the white haired elf in the crow's nest they knew their sister was home. Isabela's crew tied the ship to the moorings and put down the gang plank. The pirate was the first to saunter down from the ship and was greeted by a crushing hug from Bethany. "Isabela how are you?"

"I am well Kitten, we hit some rough water, but nothing I couldn't handle. Choir Boy though did not fair as well. He was sick most of the journey."

"Sebastian is here?!" A dark chuckle from the top of the plank made Bethany look up. She saw Fenris and Anders holding the prince up between them. He looked green.

"Carver could you help us get him down?"

"What's that prig doing here?"

"Carver Hawke! Help them get him down off the plank now." Leigh's voice echoed over the entire dock and her younger brother flinched.

"Maker, you sounded just like mother." Leigh glared at Carver and crossed her arms over her chest. "Alright don't have to pull out the crossed arms. I'm going, come on princy you're almost on dry land." Anders shook his head and handed the rather piqued prince to his brother in law. He heard Leigh let out a huff before she joined Anders going down the plank. She did let out a soft giggle watching Sebastian kiss the ground and praise dry land. Bethany did not want to break the homecoming, but she wanted her sister to know that their cousin was gone.

"Did you hear about Miranda?"

"Yes, Varric gave Anders the message. How many did we lose?"

"All in her group, ten in all. The Divine...she had them displayed on the border as a warning. Cullen and some of the other Templars took a chance and retrieved the bodies to give them a proper funeral." Leigh nodded and stayed silent. Anders wrapped his arms around her, but also was quiet. "I'm sorry Leigh."

"We knew there would be losses Beth...I...I want to see my children." Bethany smiled and nodded leading the group back to the palace in Denerim.

OoO

Arden watched her grandchildren play in the king's garden. Drea had been trying to stand on her own for a week now, but the older woman thought she was waiting for her parents to return. Karl played knights and dragons with Duncan and poor Tovis was the dragon. The one who worried her was Meghan. The girl had been very quiet in the last week. She had woken one night from a terrible nightmare and had been melancholy ever since. The little girl was sitting away from the others playing with Ser Pounce a Lot and her own kitten Tally.

"Meghan, would you like to come and sit by me for a while?" The little girl shook her head and held her kitten closer to body. The small black ball of fluff mewed and pawed at the girl's auburn curls.

"I want my Da." Arden sighed. She wanted her son home as well. Bethany had filled in training Meghan in Anders' absence, but Meghan had questions that the woman could not answer. The last tantrum had caused quite stir when Meghan set the practice room on fire. The Queen had assured Arden it was alright and no harm was done, but the older woman still worried. Meghan was only a child, so much younger than most mages that come into their power. It was frightening to think what could happen if the child ever turned on someone. Arden was so lost in her own thoughts she did not see Leigh and Anders quietly come through the door just in front of her.

"Mummy!" Karl stopped mid swing of his wooden sword and charged straight for his mother. Leigh knelt down a took the boy in her arms holding him tight. Arden held Drea and stood up to move towards her son and Leigh.

"Oh my little one I missed you." Anders stayed a little bit back and kept his eyes on Sebastian who had also come into the garden. Meghan rose to run to her father, but stopped dead when she saw the white armor of the prince. Sebastian smiled shyly and knelt down.

"Hello lass." Meghan looked over Sebastian's shoulder and met Anders' gaze. He nodded and motioned for her to go to Sebastian. Meghan eyed him cautiously and slowly extended her fingers out to touch Sebastian's face. Her eyes looked him over, seeing his skin matched hers. Small fingers combed through the prince's auburn hair inspecting it closely, comparing it to hers. Lastly she looked into the man's eyes and saw the same bright blue staring back at her and she gave a small smile.

"Who is he?" Karl's voice broke the silence and made Leigh gulp a breath. She had not realized she had stop breathing as she watched Meghan and Sebastian.

"He is Prince Vael of Starkhaven, Karl. He is a friend." The young boy narrowed his eyes and continued to stare at Sebastian.

"I don't like him." Anders gave a small chuckle and quickly turned it into a cough. Leigh shot her husband a withering look.

"Arden can you take Karl and Drea to the kitchen? I think I heard that the cook made fruit tarts."

"Of course my dear. Come on lad." Karl heard food and ran after his grandmother. He paused at the door and looked back to his twin. Leigh saw something pass between them, but neither uttered a word. Meghan nodded and Karl turned to leave.

"I'm sorry Sebastian, Karl is very protective of his sister."

"They are twins, yes?"

"Yes, Karl is the older of the two by a few minutes." Sebastian rose to his feet and settled himself on one of the benches that lined the garden. Leigh took the seat next to him. Meghan sat in her lap and hugged her mother tightly.

"Do I have to go Mummy?" Leigh looked down at her daughter and raised and eyebrow.

"Go?"

"With my father. Do I have to leave?" Leigh blinked back tears and opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. Sebastian shook his head while placing his hand on the little girl's shoulder.

"No Meghan, your home is here with your brother and sister. I am not here to take you away." Meghan smiled a little and got down off her mother's lap. She quickly hugged Sebastian before running to Anders. Sebastian watched his daughter wrap her arms around the blonde mage's neck and kiss his cheek. A pang of hurt ran through him, but he did not let it show.

"Is it alright if I take her to the kitchen to join her siblings?"

"I think that would be a good idea love. Sebastian and I should go find Queen Ashlyn."

"Go get your kitten sweetheart and we will go." Meghan jumped from Anders' arms and scooped up the small black ball of fluff. Before she could turn around Anders had picked her up and placed her on his shoulders. The little girl squealed in delight.

"She does love him, doesn't she?" Sebastian had to turn away or his face would betray his feelings. Leigh had warned him this would happen, but he had hoped that Meghan would have chosen him over Anders.

"Yes and he loves her very much too. She is a very lucky girl."

"Why because he excepted another man's child?"

"No, because she has two fathers who would do anything for her. Most girls would kill for that." This statement made the prince smile and nod his head. "We should go and find the queen. She will want to see you and hear what you know about the Divine's plans."

"Aye."

OoO

Ashlyn Theirin stared at all the parchment in front of her. Most held good news of allies pledging support, but a few gave very grave news. The last one she had read was from Ser Cullen. It stated the condition of the bodies of their lost group. Most showed signs of torture and slow deaths. That in itself made the woman angry, but the fact that Miranda Amell's body was not among the group worried her much more. A soft knock on the study broke her from her thoughts.

"Come in." Isabela poked her head in the door before she entered.

"You looked stressed Queenie." Ashlyn smiled in spite of the dull headache she was getting. Isabela always had a way of making her laugh, even when there was nothing to laugh about.

"Being the one of the rulers of a country that opposes the most powerful woman in all of Thedas will cause a bit of stress Izzy."

"I thought you were the most powerful woman in Thedas, or maybe Hawke, not that old bat?"

"She is not that old and as far as most are concerned she is the Maker's chosen to lead his worship. I fear that she might still sway some countries to her side and we will lose this war."

"Who has yet to take sides?"

"Starkhaven, Kirkwall, Rivain, and Antiva."

"Hmm, well you have Rivain if I have anything to say about it. Most of my people are tired of being called heathens for our more risque ways. Zevran has all but taken over the Crows in Antiva so you have them as well."

"So he finally did it?"

"You can ask him yourself he is here. As are most of your allies."

"What of Hawke and Anders?"

"That's why I am here kitten, I brought them home. They ran into some of the Seekers in Starkhaven and had to play hide and seek for a bit."

"Thank the Maker. Without them...you know I really don't want to think about that. Could you gather the rest and have them meet in the throne room? I will be along shortly." Isabela smirked and gave a bow as she left. "Did you hear all of that?" A crow flew down from the rafters and changed into a dark haired woman.

"I did. You have not lost your touch Warden. You were always very hard to fool."

"Your perfume gave you away Morrigan. I have not run across to many people that use deathroot and nightshade as a perfume." The witch smiled and embraced her friend. "I'm surprised to see you here with Flemeth still lurking around."

"Tis she who sent me here. She found us not too long ago. We...came to a accord for now."

"What of your child? Is he safe?"

"Yes, she would not dare hurt him or take him from me. She fears what will happen if she does."

"You will have to fill me in on that later. I have to go meet with all of the leaders of this little rebellion." Morrigan gave a chuckle and followed Ashlyn as she left her study. "I am not sure Alistair will be happy to see you."

"I care not for what he likes or dislikes. I am here to see if this Champion of mages is as powerful as they say she is."

"Did Flemeth put you up to this as a way to keep her off your back and away from your son?" Morrigan gave a dark chuckle and shook her head.

"Flemeth fears this Champion, but also respects her, as she respects you. Not many people can say that and as far as I know there are only two alive that hold her respect." Ashlyn smirked and pushed the do to the throne room open. Alistair was sitting in his throne at the end of the long chamber. Surrounding him were nobles, dwarves, elves, mages and others invested in this war. Ashlyn saw his eyes narrow at the sight of their old companion, but he said nothing as the women walked closer. Morrigan went and stood off in the shadows while Ashlyn sat next to her husband. Alistair rose to his feet and addressed the crowd.

"I thank you all for coming here today. I know this war is weighing heavy on all of our minds. Our borders have been closed for over three years, but our trade with the dwarves and our help from other countries has kept Ferelden alive."

"What of the other countries will they not join us in this war to put pressure on the Divine? She is threatening their lands too!"

"I understand your worry, but we have yet to hear from a few of the others." Ashlyn could see Alistair's worry, even if he did not let it show on his face. His eyes showed her his fear and hopelessness. Isabela and Zevran stepped forward and Alistair's eyes perked up a bit.

"Both Rivain and Antiva stand with Ferelden Your Majesty. I have many ships ready to do what needs to be done. We can transport almost anything, from supplies, troops or well anything."

"The Crows stand at the ready to do whatever is wished of us."

"You also have Starkhaven and Kirkwall standing at the ready." Ashlyn lifted her gaze and saw that Leigh and Anders had finally arrived. The person who marched in behind them nearly bowled her over. Sebastian Vael followed after the Champion and her husband. The loud murmur of the nobles and the others gathered in the throne room.

"Prince Vael, it is good to see you again."

"And you as well Queen Theirin. I pledge my support and bring a message from Aveline in Kirkwall. She and her men are ready to lend aid as well."

"With all of you we should be able to make the Divine see reason and stop this war before it truly begins." A dark laugh sounded in the chamber and all eyes turned to Morrigan. She stepped into the middle of the room shaking her head and tsking Alistair.

"You can not reason with a demon Alistair, surely you know this. The Divine will hope to weaken all of you then send a legion on demons to feast on what remains. The only way to beat her is to kill her." Most of the nobles had no idea Morrigan had at one time been a member of the Wardens' group that saved them years ago. Most sneered at the scantily clad witch before one blocked her way.

"Who are you?" Leigh gasped and took a step forward. Her voice was a low whisper of surprise.

"Shade?!" Morrigan smiled.

"It is good to see you again Hawke. I had worried you had met your end during the Blight, but it seems my mother had other plans for you."

"Your mother?"

"The one who saved you from the horde, the one you saved from death a year later."

"Maker, you're Flemeth's daughter. If I had known..." Morrigan put her hand up to silence the younger woman.

"It had to be this way. She had to save you or all would have been lost." Anders stood behind Leigh ready to move against Morrigan if he had to. Something about the woman's eyes made him stop. A flash of memory came to him and his eyes went wide. She was the same girl that had led them to the hut in the woods when Leigh was suffering from the cold.

"You're the one who led us to that hunting shack all those years ago?" Morrigan looked up at Anders and narrowed her eyes. She was trying to figure out if she knew him or not.

"And you would be?"

"Anders, Leigh's husband."

"Hmmm, so you became tied down by another mage." Leigh sighed and shook her head.

"No same mage from before. We found each other again."

"He's the one you helped? The years have not been kind to him then." Anders glared and let out a annoyed huff.

"Now there is no need to be rude. You're no spring chicken either."

"Why do women insist on finding foolish men to be with? I would have thought you would have done better Hawke." Leigh smiled and took her love's hand.

"He is my match in every way. Foolish or not, I love him." Morrigan rolled her eyes, but said nothing more. "Why are you here?"

"As an apostate I have a stake in this war too. I have come to help if I can." A loud mirthless laugh sounded from the throne and Leigh saw the king rise from his seat.

"Your type of help is not needed Morrigan. The last time you helped you wanted a high price."

"Still bitter I see." Leigh had never seen Alistair with the cold look of hate he had on his face right now. He normally was a jovial man, witty and quick with a optimistic remark. This was a side of him she was not sure she ever wanted to see.

"I was never bitter Morrigan." Ashlyn cleared her throat and gently pushed Alistair back a bit.

"Fighting amongst ourselves will get us nowhere. We have already lost good people. I will not turn away help if it is freely given."

"Nothing she ever does is for free."

"Alistair enough. We have things to discuss that need to be hashed out now. All of our allies are here and we need to make a plan." Alistair's shoulders sagged a bit and he nodded sheepishly.

"You're right my love, let's get to this."

OoO

"Maker, I am glad I am not a noble. How can Ashlyn stand all of that banter and ass kissing?"

"She's been a noble all her life right?" Anders flopped down on the bed and rubbed his temples. The entire meeting gave him a raging headache.

"Yes, but..."

"She is just use to it love. There is a lot at stake should this fail. All of the nobles are scared." Leigh laid back on the bed next to her husband and stared at the ceiling. "I can't blame them, I'm not sure if we can..." Anders put his finger over Leigh's lips to silence her.

"We can, it will end Leigh. It has to or it will become much worse for everyone. She won't stop at just imprisoning mages. The Dalish, dwarves and all who have stood against her will suffer. We can't give up now, not when we are so close to ending this." Leigh nodded numbly and melted into him.

"I guess I am just like every one else, I'm scared Anders. If this fails..."

"It won't. Our children will grow up in a world that is free of the Chantry's oppression."

"Speaking of our children, I want to see them. I did not get a chance to spend much time with them today between Sebastian and this meeting."

"They should be in their room." Leigh stood and pulled Anders off the bed and headed for their children's room. Slowly she opened the door and smiled seeing her two oldest playing with their toys and her youngest sitting in her grandmother's lap. She noticed that Sebastian was sitting in a chair off to the side of the room. He was watching Meghan as she dressed her doll. Her kitten sat curled in her lap asleep. Anders moved passed Leigh and sat next to Sebastian and watched the children in silence. Leigh made her way over to Arden and held out her arms to take Drea.

"Thank you Arden. I know we were gone a long time."

"They are no trouble dear. It is a Gran's job to spoil her grandchildren. What you and Leo are doing is important, not just for mages, but for everyone in Thedas."

"I know, but it is taking me away from my children. It makes my heart ache to be away from them."

"They will understand when they are older. For now they know they are loved." Arden's eyes fell on Sebastian before turning back to Leigh. "So that's the prince."

"Yes."

"He is not what I expected. When he came in here I was expecting him to bark orders, but he just sat down and watched the wee ones. Meghan even went and sat on his lap for a few moments till hr kitten decided to paw at her toes."

"I'm glad she is warming up to him. She is so shy around people. It took her months to warm up to Miranda." Sadness etched itself across Leigh's face and she felt Arden gently pat her arm.

"Bethany told me she is gone. I did not tell Meghan yet, I was not sure what to say."

"Cullen sent word that they found all of her group save her. I want to hope..."

"But it is likely she is gone too."

"She deserved better than this."

"They all do my dear. If not for what you and the others have accomplished there would be many more deaths. You have become the hope of all mages."

"Let's hope there faith in me is well placed or this will be the shortest war in history." Arden nodded sadly and the two women sat in silence as the children played. Leigh raised her gaze to Anders and saw the same worry in his eyes. She began rising to her feet to join her husband next to Sebastian, but the startled cry of Meghan made her jump. Anders reached the little girl first, followed quickly by the prince.

"Sweetheart?"

"Mimi is in pain." The girl's face was pale and she began to cry. Anders wrapped his arms around her and let her cry into his shoulder. Sebastian looked lost.

"Hawke, who is Mimi?"

"Miranda Amell, my cousin. She was helping train Meghan."

"How can she know she is in pain?"

"Meghan has a connection to everyone she loves. She has a stronger one with those who have spent a lot of time with her. It is part of her talents."

"Maker!"

"I tried to warn you that there was going to be a lot that was hard to understand. As far as we know Meghan is the only one of her kind ever to be born. Most Somniari are like me. We are warriors, destroyers and in very rare cases we can be healers. I learned how to heal from Anders and the spirit that is joined with me. Meghan is a far stronger mage than I will ever be, but her magic is...innocent, pure, it is nothing like I have ever seen."

"Is she a danger?"

"No, she is too gentle and shy to hurt anyone. We think...she is a spirit of Purity made flesh." Sebastian jerked his head and stared at his daughter who was still clinging to Anders. The scrolls he had read not more than a few weeks ago came to his mind. The last page stood out the most. The words from it flowed out of his mouth and he began to understand what Andraste's daughter meant.

"When the virtues stand up against her as one she will not be able to stand. Purity must be protected or all hope is lost. Compassion for one's enemy is the greatest gift one can give in seeking justice. Courage and fortitude are needed to show one's valor in the darkest of times. Above all else faith is needed. Faith in yourself, your allies and the Maker himself. This is the only way to defeat Strife."

"What?"

"It was written on the scrolls Elthina gave me. It was the last words given to both Mercy and Drea by their mother. She named all the spirits that would be needed to stand up against Strife or people that embody those virtues. You and Anders embody Compassion and Justice. Meghan is Purity..."

"Maker you're right, but how do we find the others?"

"That I don't know, but we have to try and find them. Strife must be stopped and the Chantry must be returned to the way it was meant to be. Our world has been in darkness too long, it is time for the Maker's light to shine again." Leigh smiled and put her hand against Sebastian's cheek.

"I think we have found Faith. I have never met anyone that embodied it more." A blush flushed the prince's skin and he turned his eyes back to his daughter. She had calmed a bit, but still had her face buried in the crook of Anders' neck. He was not sure if he was the embodiment of Faith, but he would do all he could to protect his daughter. He knew that Hawke and Anders would do the same. Sebastian made his way over to Anders and Meghan. Anders raised his head and slowly handed Meghan over to her father and the girl curled her tiny frame into the prince's arms.

"I promise that we will make this right Meghan. You have my word."


	51. Chapter 51

Sebastian knock quietly on Leigh and Anders' door. He heard soft foot falls and the door slowly opened. Anders put his finger to his lips and ushered the prince into the room. A soft red glow illuminated the room and the sight that meet Sebastian made him stop dead with shock. Sitting in the middle of the room was Leigh. Her eyes were open, but unseeing. The hellish red glow was coming from her. Her skin looked cracked and lines of crimson. The air in the room felt thick and charged with energy. Anders pushed the man into the other room and shut the door.

"What...how..."

"She is in the Fade talking to some of our allies. It is the best way to pass information to some of our more obscure friends."

"Is this how she was able to have me see Meghan?" Anders smiled and nodded his head. "Maker."

"Leigh can enter dreams or even minds of people that are awake. It is not a power she uses lightly. A weak mind can be destroyed if she pushes to hard." Sebastian sank into a chair and stared at the floor. He had heard rumors of her being powerful, but he always thought it was because of her presence not her magic.

"Can she control people?"

"If she wanted to, but we both know she never would do that. Her father taught her better than that. She is what most mages dream to be. A strong confident person who is not broken, a person who understands how to survive. I was lucky, the Wardens showed me how to survive outside of the Circle. Leigh and Bethany are the example of what mages can be given a chance to have a normal life."

"This is what you are trying to do for Meghan and others like her?"

"Our daughter will never know the pain of being ripped away from her family. I think all three of us will do what ever we can to make sure of that." Sebastian raise his head and quirked his eyebrow. A smirk graced his face.

"Our daughter?"

"She holds my heart Sebastian. She has since she was born. In my heart she is just as much mine as my other children are. Nothing you or anyone says will ever change that. I would gladly die protecting her and her siblings."

"I was so very wrong about you. I thought nothing mattered to you but your cause. I always thought you would hurt Leigh and leave her broken. I see now that you were the only one who could have understood her."

"I am glad you can be so easily fooled. I don't think men were meant to understand women, but I do love her. She and I have owned each others hearts for over seventeen years."

"You met before Kirkwall?"

"She saved me from Templars and taught me that there was more to life than just meaningless trysts." The prince nodded and stood. He opened the door quietly and went to sit in the room that Leigh was in. The men sat in silence waiting for Leigh to come out of the Fade.

OoO

Leigh had concluded her meeting in the Fade with Feynrial and the Black Divine. It had went rather well all things considering. Tevinter would stand with Ferelden, Antiva, The Free Marches and Rivain. Now it seemed Orlais was surrounded. It was hoped that they could force the Divine into surrendering. Leigh knew that was wishful thinking, but part of her hoped. She stayed in the Fade after the others had left. She had to collect her thoughts and here seemed the safest place. She could feel Pash stirring in her mind, but the spirit was quiet. Leigh felt a shiver run through her and she turned just in time to dodge a bolt of energy. She rolled and jumped back to her feet.

"You are fast mortal. The accolades your people spew about you are true. You are a lovely as Andraste was and as loved." Leigh narrowed her eyes and drew her blades.

"The Divine I presume?" The older woman walked closer and smiled sweetly at Hawke.

"I thought it was time we met."

"Not that I am not flattered you would take the time to to find little old me, but how did you know I was here?"

"I have my ways. Your cousin was so sure that you would not be able to be persuaded to end this peacefully. I hope we can end this conflict."

"This will end only when you change what is done to mages. They are not puppets for the Chantry to use when they see fit, they are people!" The Divine sneered and waved her hand. The Fade changed around them. It turned darker, more ominous.

"Your kind does not deserve the powers you were given. The Maker made us first, we were his chosen!"

"Then why did he make us? Why give some of us the ability to walk the Fade while awake? He loves all his children. Spirit, mortal what does it matter. He has love enough for all of us."

"Then why is it your kind can walk in both worlds and mine can not? I must inhabit this disgusting body to walk among you. Mages where his chosen. They were to be the gateway for mortals to be able to gain his favor. Andraste's foolish daughter Mercy was to be the new voice of the Maker. It should never have been. I know what you are. You are nothing compared to me."

"You're jealous. This is why thousands of people have suffered? You want to make him pay for ignoring you, so you abuse the ones he wanted to lead mortals. You're insane." An evil laugh echoed in the space between the women. The Divine shifted into her true form. She was a pride demon, but she was not large and grotesque like her kin. She looked more like a desire demon, but her horns stood straight up instead of curling. She wore a robe, not the scant clothing the desire demons wore.

"Jealous of you? Your kind scampers around like a swarm of locust. He was a fool to make you with a free will. I will not let you win Hawke. I will make him see what a mistake he made making mortals. I was his first child, his most loved till your kind was made. I will gain his favor again." Leigh shook her head and let out a mirthless laugh.

"You killed both of his mortal daughters do you really think he will forgive you." The look on Strife's face told Leigh that she did not know Mercy and Drea were the Maker's children."

"Impossible! He would not have gifted mortals as he did with his first born."

"He knew your kind was flawed, you could not grow passed what you are. You could only be what he made you to be. Mortals can choose, and the only way spirits can choose is to take a mortal over. That's what happened isn't it? You meet a mortal in the Fade and became curious."

"I found it disgusting that your kind could use the same magic spirits could. Your filth polluted my home. I will not stop until there are no more mages. I will make him see that he made a mistake."

"We will stop you."

"I doubt that. I already have one of your family, very soon I will have at least two more. If you want them back you will have to face me. I wonder if you are stronger than Mercy and Drea? Both died so pitifully. I had such hopes for Drea. She was the one who created the Templars. It was her talents that made them possible, but they lacked the connection to magic she had. Giving them lyrium was a blessing in disguise. It made most to addicted to question."

"Who do you have?"

"Miranda, but she was stronger willed than I thought. It took time to break her. I wonder if Ser Cullen will be as strong or one of your children." Leigh lunged at the demon who disappeared right before the rogue made contact. "Temper, temper Hawke. Come find me where your kind use to have a safe haven. I will be waiting." Leigh let out a scream of rage and the Fade around her pulsed with magic. She let her magic reach out into the emptiness of the Fade. She hoped it would let her find Cullen and warn him. When her magic recoiled back to her she knew that Cullen was already taken. She could feel pain surrounding him and her heart ached. How could she tell Bethany that her betrothed was in the hands of the Divine? Leigh's mind remembered the other thing the demon had said. One of her children was in danger.

OoO

Both Anders and Sebastian jumped when they heard the animal like growl sound from Leigh. The glow around her went out fast and Leigh was on her feet in one quick movement. She either did not see the men there or did not care. Her only thought was to find her children and make sure nothing could get to them. Both men followed and tried to ask what was wrong, but Leigh just sprinted through the wing of the castle that housed her family. She reached the bedroom that just hours ago she tucked her children into their beds. Once she reached the door she threw it open door her heart stopped when she looked around a room. Drea was in her crib and Karl was in his bed, but Meghan's bed was empty. Leigh's eyes wheeled around the room and saw no sign of her oldest daughter.

"Maker, no please..." Anders finally caught up with Leigh and saw her shaking, her gaze on Meghan's bed.

"Love?" He reached out to touch her, but Leigh whipped around and ran to Arden's room which was down the hall. "Leigh wait." Fear gripped her as she ran willing her body to go faster. She kicked open the door making the older woman sit up in her bed.

"Leigh? What's wrong?"

"Is Meghan in here with you?" Arden shook her head and rose from her bed. She quickly wrapped herself in a robe and rushed out into the hall after Leigh.

"Leigh what is wrong?" Leigh could not form the words, afraid to put to words her worst fears. Anders and Sebastian came up the hall with worried looks on their faces. "Leo what is going on? I have never seen her like this."

"I'm not sure Mum, love please...what is going on?" Leigh closed her eyes and reached out her mana to find her daughter. She felt the girl's presence close by and began to run in the direction. "Dammit Leigh what is wrong?"

"The Divine has Cullen and said she was going to take one of our children. Meghan is missing..." Without another word she raced out to the back entrance of the palace. Skidding to a halt Leigh barely missed the arrow that flew at her. Her eyes fell on a group of Templars. Behind them was Miranda with a unconscious Meghan in her arms. Miranda's eyes glowed a sickly green and her face was a mask of malice. "Give her back!"

"Sorry cousin, but the Divine so wants to meet her." Sebastian let loose an arrow hitting one of the Templars closest to the mage. Miranda just smirked and held a small dagger next to Meghan's neck. "I would not do that again if I were you."

"If you hurt her demon I swear I will make you pay."

"Such strong words from a man who was not gifted with magic. You are nothing!" The hand that held the dagger raised up and sent a blast of energy toward Sebastian. Leigh stepped in front of him and batted the bolt away. She saw the shock on the faces of both the Templars and her cousin. They were not prepared for her to be this strong.

"Give me back my daughter or so help me I will rip you all apart!" Miranda tsked and slipped back further behind the Templars.

"Keep her busy." The armored men closed ranks. Leigh let her magic manifest in her hands. One wreathed in fire, the other jumped with lightning. Anders' skin cracked and the blue glow illuminated the clearing they had been standing in. Sebastian notched an arrow, holding his aim for the right moment. The Templars moved forward, but stopped dead when they saw Leigh had reinforcements. Arden had alerted Bethany that Meghan was missing and the younger Hawke brought help.

"I suggest you give up now and your lives will be spared." Alistair stood right behind Anders, his own sword drawn. Fenris and Isabela rounded to either side both ready for whatever came next. Bethany placed herself right next of her sister.

"We will not bow to a heathen king. Our leader is the Divine."

"Their enthralled Alistair just like in the Tower during the Blight. The Divine is using her powers over them." Morrigan came out of the shadows. "She is stronger than you realize and her power over them absolute. They will not listen and you are wasting time to find the child. If she is lost then we have no hope." The first Templars were not prepared for what came next. Leigh let out a feral howl and shot fire and lightning at them. The screams were deafening, blocking out the din of metal on metal. The mages threw spells to stymie the Templars allowing the melee fighters to finish them off. Once all the Templars were down Leigh began to take off toward where she saw Miranda disappear only to be grabbed by Morrigan. "You can't go running after them alone. This is what she wants Hawke." Leigh twisted and tried to pull away, her mothering instincts were to find her daughter. Nothing else mattered but Meghan .

"I don't care what the Divine wants...I need to get my daughter back!"

"We will, but you have to keep your head. Storming after her will only serve one thing, getting you killed. If you are lost then everyone will suffer."

"How can you ask me to stand here and do nothing Shade? If it was your child..."

"I would be feeling the same way you are, but I would do him a great disservice in running off blind." Leigh relaxed as much as she could under the circumstances. Even the warm comfort of Anders' arms could not dull the dread in her heart. Her gaze fixed on Sebastian and she winced. He too looked like his heart had just been ripped from his chest.

"We will find her love and the Divine will pay for all of this." Anders was still glowing and his voice was a mixture of his and Justice. "How did you know she was coming for her?"

"I stayed in the Fade after my meeting with Feynriel and the Black Divine. She somehow found me...said she had broken Miranda...now she has Cullen and our daughter. She said if I wanted them back I would have to come to the last safe haven our kind had." Anders sneered, but she could not tell if it was his reaction to the news or Justice's.

"How in the name of the Maker did she get her hands on Cullen?"

"I'm not sure Alistair, but my guess would be she had Miranda lure him somewhere. I tried to warn him, but I was too late...they have him already..." Leigh's eyes fell on her sister and she swallowed hard. "Beth we will get him back. I promise you that. I know where they are going, but I have to talk to Alistair and Ashlyn about the lay out of the place." Bethany nodded numbly. She was close to breaking down, Leigh could see it in her eyes. Thankfully Isabela wrapped a comforting arm around the younger Hawke. "Fenris I need your help...I have to try to help Cullen stay strong so we don't to fight both him and Miranda."

"I will meet you in the study then." Leigh bit her lip and gave a sharp nod. He mind raced with all the things that could happen and how to stop it. Pash was quiet, but she was there. Leigh could feel her worry and her anger. "_Pash?" "She will pay for this!" "Yes, she will, but Shade is right we can't lose our heads. Can you help me get to Cullen?" "Of course."_

OoO

Fenris shifted uncomfortably in the chair across from Leigh. The last time someone had used his lyrium markings to amplify their magic it was excruciating. Almost akin to being skinned alive. Isabela stayed close and tried to be a positive as possible. She knew how much this frightened him, but she also knew he would do anything to help Hawke. Leigh had her eyes closed and was trying to calm her nerves.

"Hawke are you sure this is the only way?" Leigh opened her eyes and met Isabela's gaze.

"I used a lot of mana even before we fought the Templars. I don't know if I have enough to reach Cullen. I fear she might try to do what Tarohne did to Keran all those years ago. Cullen is strong, but so is this demon. She broke Miranda already...if there was any other way I would do it. I don't want to hurt Fenris..."

"Hawke, do what you have to. I know the stakes are high. Pain means nothing." Leigh saw determination in the elf's eyes and she reached forward to take his hands.

"I will be as gentle as possible. Most of my mana comes from the Fade...once I am there I will not have to draw on you as much. Are you ready?"

"Yes. I trust you Hawke." Leigh smiled and set herself back a bit. Fenris closed his eyes as the first jolt of magic drew from his markings. A hiss came from his lips, but he did not pull away. It felt different from when Danarius use to use him in this way. Leigh's touch was gentle and her magic far kinder. It felt more like a light tingle than a raging agony. When he opened his eyes he saw hers glowing. She gave him a sad smile before all recognition left her face. Anders saw her muscles relax and he tapped Isabela on the shoulder. He motioned for her to follow.

"She is in the Fade. I am not sure how long this will take. We should go and speak with Ashlyn and some of the other leaders."

"Who will stay and watch them?" Carver and Ori entered the room. "Guess that answers that question."

"The Queen sent us to get all of you, but it looks like my sister and Fenris are busy. Choir boy is waiting in the throne room. Ori and I will wait here just in case." Anders turned to walk out the door, but Carver caught him. "We will get them back Anders. That bitch messed with the wrong family."

"I hope you're right..."

OoO

Leigh stood in the Fade surrounded by spirits. Hope, Valor, Fortitude and Pash stood in the safe haven that Leigh created years ago. Hope looked distraught after hearing Meghan was now in the hands of the Chantry. Valor paced the clearing with his fists clenched.

"Valor I need you to help me save Cullen." The spirit turned and gave Leigh a questioning look. "If he has someone to protect him here in the Fade the Divine may not be able to break him."

"Hawke..."

"I am not asking you to join with him. He need someone to help keep him strong, defend him against become possessed." Valor shook his head and stepped back away from Leigh.

"I..."

"Brother she would not ask if we had any other recourse. If Cullen is lost than we all are. He embodies your virtue. All eight of the us must be represented or Strife wins and the mages will stand no chance. She will kill or make Tranquil all that remain. Ferelden will fall and all the people who have fought so hard to put right what we failed to do will suffer. Please Zander, we need your help."

"He...he is Zander, from the scrolls?"

"Yes, after Drea faced the Divine and lost her life Zander became head of Haven. His valor and leadership kept the people of Haven safe for years."

"I thought none of the others remembered who they were before."

"Once Justice remembered who he was, the others slowly followed. Faith resides in the Wynne, but as you said Sebastian embodies the very essence of faith."

"Alright, So I am Compassion, Anders is Justice, Cullen is Valor, Sebastian is Faith, and Meghan is Purity. We are missing three."

"Courage, Hope and Fortitude, I know. We will find them, but first we must help Cullen." Leigh closed her eyes and concentrated on Cullen. It took her a few minutes, but she found him through all the other minds running in the Fade. She could also feel demons moving closer to where he was in the Fade.

"Found him. We need to hurry." Leigh had learned how to travel across the Fade quickly. Being a Somniari gave her the ability that very few mages had ever been gifted with. She could make portals to almost anywhere in the Fade. The ground in front of her began to shift and make a arch. Purple haze formed in the center and Pash gave her host a look of great pride.

"You never cease to amaze me Leigh."

"Let's hope that never changes. Ready Zander?"

"As I will ever be." Leigh stepped through the portal followed closely by Valor. What greeted her on the other side made her blood boil. Cullen was on his knees surrounded by rage demons and shades. His armor looked like it had been shredded and Leigh could see the skin underneath was blistered and red. The more powerful rage demon rose up in front of Cullen to loom over him.

"Give in mortal. No one will save you. Your Maker had forsaken you, as he had forsaken us."

"I will never give in! Leave me be demon, I will not bend to you!" The demon raised it's arm to strike the Templar only to find a ice bolt through it's chest.

"**Leave him alone!"** Leigh raised her hands over her head and watched the shades scatter. The rage demon growled and again made a move at the Templar only to be frozen. Valor wasted no time in shattering the demon. Leigh and Pash both rushed to Cullen's side. He cringed at Leigh's touch. "Cullen?"

"It is like the Tower all over again. Be gone demon. I will not let you break me."

"Of for the love of...Cullen it's me."

"No! I will not fall for it." Leigh sighed and shot Pash a pleading look. The spirit stood before the beleaguered man Her hands were behind her back and she smiled down at Cullen.

"Ser Cullen she speaks the truth. We know that Strife has you in her grasp in the waking world. She also has Miranda Amell. I am sure she used Miranda to lure you into a trap. We came here to make sure Strife did not plant a demon in you as she did to Miranda."

"Leigh?"

"Bethany would never forgive me is I did not try to make sure you were safe. At least here I can make sure you can't be hurt by demons. Valor here will be your guardian in the Fade." Valor moved to kneel next to Cullen and stretched out his hand. With a quick motion he placed a symbol on Cullen's forehead. "This mark will let him find you anywhere in the Fade. It will also block any demon from taking over your mind." Cullen rose to his feet and grasped Leigh's shoulders.

"Don't come after me Leigh. She wants you dead. The Divine fears you more than she will ever let on. Tell Beth...tell her I love her."

"You can tell her yourself when we free you. I will not sit by while that creature has people that I love. She took Meghan. So I will be coming after the Divine for this and I will get back those I love. I need you to stay strong."

"I...I will try."

"Watch over Meghan if you can. We will come for you soon." Cullen nodded and began to fade from Leigh's sight. "Andraste watch over you Cullen." Pash rested a comforting hand on Leigh's back. "I hate this. I feel helpless."

"You are not helpless. We will end this. I have faith in us."

"By your father's name I hope you're right. If that demon hurts my daughter I will make her regret ever being made by the Maker."

"You need to rest."

"I can't I need to go after my daughter..."

"You will do her no good if you are exhausted. You still need to find the others that embody the spirits we need." Leigh sighed knowing her guardian was right. She willed herself to wake and felt her body slump back into the chair. Bethany was at her side in a flash. When her eyes opened she saw Fenris in Isabela's arms. He looked tired, but otherwise alright.

"Leigh, were you able to..."

"He is safe. At least for now. She can't do to him what she did to Miranda." Leigh went to stand only to have her legs give out on her. She gave up and slumped back into her chair, letting her eyes close.

"Sunshine go get Anders to help her to bed. I will stay here with them both till you get back." Bethany ran out of the room at the pirate's request. "Fen are you alright?"

"I am fine. Just exhausted. Hawke?" Leigh opened her eyes a bit and nodded to the elf. "I will have to say you are the most gentle one to ever use my markings to fuel their magic. It was a pleasant surprise." Leigh smiled and let her eyes slip closed again. She did not stay awake long enough for Anders to come and get her. Exhaustion took over even though her soul cried out for her to go after her daughter. She could not will her body to move.

OoO

Anders held his wife to him as she slept. His mind would not quiet so he watched her sleep. His heart was aching and he worried Meghan would pay for what he had done. He started this so mages would not longer have to live in fear, but was it the right thing? Anders always thought it would be him paying the price for his revolution, not his daughter. Meghan was innocent and it killed him and Justice alike to think of her being hurt or worse. He was so deep in thought he did not see Leigh looking up at him, watching his face.

"None of this is your fault love." His body jumped a bit hearing her voice. Amber orbs met silver and no words had to be spoken. They knew each other too well. Leigh sat up and rested her forehead to her husband's. A faint flash of magic caught Leigh's attention. She felt a cold shiver run up her spine, one she had only ever felt twice before. Both times were in the presence of Flemeth. "I need to get some water."

"I'll have one of the castle servants bring some up." Leigh shook her head and pulled Anders back down on the bed.

"I can get it myself. I don't want to bother anyone."

"I could go get it then."

"No love I need to get up and stretch out my legs. I promise I will be right back." He gave her a look that told her he did not quite believe her. "Leo please, I just need to get some water. I am not running off in the middle of the night to go after Meghan. Everything inside me wants to, but I know I can't go alone."

"Alright. Just hurry back. You used a lot of your mana and then some helping Cullen in the Fade. You need to rest." Leigh leaned over and kissed his forehead. She made her way down the castle hallways till she was out in the courtyard. A shadow moved to her right and Leigh drew her dagger. The shadow held up it's hands and came into the light.

"Flemeth."

"I see you took my advice and leaped."

"Could have warned me this was coming. It would have been kinder." Flemeth gave a hardy laugh and motioned for Leigh to sit on one of the benches in the garden.

"I always wondered what you would have become given enough time to come into yourself. I will say this, you have surprised me. I thought after the death of your mother you would have taken to the darker path of magic. You have a will far greater than any other mage I have ever met."

"I am guessing you did not come here just to say that."

"No, I came here to help you find the last of your virtues. First I must tell you a small tale. One not found in your scrolls. You know of the daughters, yes?"

"Yes, I am well aware of what happened to them, both here and in the Fade."

"You are full of surprises. Do you know how Strife came to be? What she was before she became a demon?" Leigh shook her head. Even Pash did not know how Strife fell or what she was before. "Strife was the first spirit to be created by the Maker. Her name was Grace. She was unlike the rest of the spirits. She was the strongest of them and the most devoted to the Maker. When he saw that the spirits could not be more than what they were it made him sad. He had created the dragons next, hoping they would be more than what his first children had become. The dragons became prideful and turned against their creator. All the while Grace stood by and watched."

"I am guessing when he made mortals she was not happy."

"At first she found mortals to be beneath the spirits, like the dragons a failed experiment on the Maker's part, but the Maker gave to mortals free will. They fascinated him, the way they struggle to survive, the way they choose to be good or evil. He made the elvan able to enter the Fade and stay awake. This made Grace question him. She did not understand why he gave mortals the same powers that the spirits had. She questioned, but remained faithful to him. It wasn't till his gaze fell on Andraste that Grace finally turned from him. Jealousy burned in her and she set out to stop him from turning from his first born."

"How do you know all this?"

"Do you think the Divine is the only one with an old spirit residing in her? I was one of Grace's sisters."

"Are you a demon as well?" Flemeth met Leigh's gaze and smiled solemnly.

"I tried to stop her. I took over a mage and went to confront her, but in the end like Mercy, like Drea I failed. I became Regret. In time I found a mage almost as strong as you are and we both tried to end it again, but the price for Flemeth was too high. She lost everything she cared about. We have lasted in hopes someone like you would come along."

"I...I don't know what to say."

"Say nothing, just listen. If this fails all will suffer. We saved you, your family and the Wardens all for a purpose. I knew Ashlyn Cousland would be the hero this country so desperately needed. Just as you would become the Champion of Kirkwall."

"How did you know all this?"

"One of the gifts the Maker gave me. I can see what could be. Just as I knew you and Leo would find each other again even after I told the Templars where you were heading." Leigh jumped up and glared at the older woman.

"It was you who told them! It was your fault he had to go back to that nightmare! How dare you do that to him! Do you have any idea what they did to Anders?!"

"It was not a thing I did lightly. He had to endure the hardships to make him ready for his fusion with Justice."

"They broke him! The man I found in Kirkwall was not the man I left in Denerim! How could you do that?"

"If you had stayed with him, ran like you wanted to where would both of you be right now? Where would the people that both of you have saved be? Your family would have died in the Blight. Isabela, Merrill, Fenris, Aveline and yes even your dwarven friend Varric would all be dead. You had to stay in Lothering, just as Leo had to return to the Circle. What I did was for the future of our kind. I am sorry he suffered, but it was for the greater good." Leigh growled and began to pace. She knew deep down Flemeth was right, but the pain Anders has suffered made her angry. The shuffle of fabric from behind her made Leigh whip around. Fire wreathed her hand and her eyes glowed their normal red.

"She is right love." Leigh's hands clenched and the flame died out at the sight of the man she loved. "If I had stayed with you then most of our friends would be gone. As horrible as it was to go through it was worth it to find you again. To build a family, even as eclectic as our is."

"I...Maker I know, but it does not make it right." Leigh leaned back into her husband's arms and tried to calm the rage boiling in her blood. "So now that I know what Strife is, how do we stop her?"

"The eight must face her. You have justice, compassion, faith, valor and purity already. Fortitude and hope are right here with you. Your sister embodies the hope for a better life all people want. Your friend Fenris or even your brother, both embody Fortitude with what they both have survived."

"What about the last one? Without Courage we can't do this." Flemeth stood and placed herself so she could look right into Leigh's eyes.

"Courage lives in every person. She sacrificed herself to give her gift to all mortals. As long as one of you shows courage she will always be with you."

"Then we have nothing else delaying us."

"Only one thing." Leigh raised an eyebrow and waited for the witch to continue. "I ask that you end me. I have lived here too long and have no desire to stay once all this is over."

"Then why go through all the trouble of having me take that amulet all the way to Sundermont for if you were just going to have me kill you now?"

"There were things I had to finish before my end that were not done. Now I leave them to my daughter and her child to finish."

"You mean Shade."

"Ah yes that is the name you know her by. Her true name is Morrigan. I sent her to observe you and your family. It amazed me you were so powerful and yet never used your magic. It was then I found you were bound to keep your family safe. I watched you during your time at Ostagar. The magic you used to protect your brother was awe inspiring."

"Using it nearly killed me."

"I know, but you survived and have flourished. You will accomplish what we could not. Flemeth and I see now are time is at an end." Leigh nodded and drew her dagger.

"Close your eyes. I will make it as quick as I can." Flemeth gave her a genuine smile.

"I know you will." With a shaky breath Leigh placed her dagger over the older woman's heart. All it took was a slight flick of her wrist and the dagger imbedded itself. Flemeth gasped and fell into Leigh's arms.

"May the Maker take you back into his arms, may you find peace." Anders stayed silent watching his wife gently lower the old mage's body down to the ground. Her fingers swept over Flemeth's eyes, closing them. "Anders please go find Morrigan and bring her here."

"Love?"

"I'll be fine." She heard the rustle of his robes and she waited til the sound disappeared. "_She will find peace Leigh." "I hope we all do." "Only time will tell."_

**Okay we are almost to the end. I think I have about two or three chapters left in this. I am truly sorry about how long it has taken me to write this. Life is not my friend right now. Thank you all for sticking with me and being so patient. **

**Raven**


	52. Chapter 52

"So we all have our orders. Carver Hawke will lead our army to the border of Orlais and will be aided by the Dalish. Isabela's fleet will be monitoring the seas to make sure we are not hit from the water. Alistair and I will stay here to make sure Denerim does not fall." Ashlyn was in her more royal armor instead of her assassin leathers. Leigh and Anders had began gathering their group together and were waiting for the last member to show. Bethany, Fenris, and Sebastian were ready to go, but they were waiting for Morrigan. After her mother's death the witch had sworn that she would help them. Ashlyn saw the uneasy look on Leigh's face. With all of the nobles around she had to keep things formal, but her eyes spoke volumes on how she felt right then. If it had been her son she would be "Hawke we have horses tacked up and ready for all of you. I wish you well and will make sure your children are well taken care of." Leigh gave a sharp nod and hefted her pack onto her shoulder. Morrigan finally showed. Her face was set in a mask of indifference. If she was hurting from her mother's death, she did not show it. Ashlyn pulled her aside and the two women talked quietly to each other. "Are you alright?"

"There is no need for your sympathy my friend, you know full well Flemeth was not a loving mother."

"She was still your mother." Morrigan sighed and gave a heavy nod.

"She was, but she also was a malificar. She delighted in making people afraid. If not for you I would have been one of her victims."

"I was not about to let her take your life away Morrigan. You're my friend."

"And how did I repay your friendship? I did what she wanted and I am not even sure it was necessary. Talisen cannot do more than shapshift. The vast power she thought he would be gifted with tis not there."

"With Flemeth dead who is taking care of him if you are going to help Hawke?"

"He is safe and well taken care of." Ashlyn opened her mouth to ask another question, but closed it quickly. She was not sure she wanted the answer. "My friend...if something should happen..."

"He will be welcome here." Morrigan smiled genuinely at her old friend. "How can I find him if...Maker I don't want to think of any of you not coming back."

"He knows to come to you if I should not return. He wants nothing more than to live and be content. He does not want the crown or to take Duncan's birthright."

"He is Alistair's son, Morrigan, and the eldest. If he wanted to take the throne he has the right to."

"Tis not something you have to worry about it." The Queen gave her friend and small smile. "Tell Alistair I am sorry for all of it. I would try myself...he hates me and always will. I cannot blame him, but he did give me the greatest gift. For that I will be forever grateful." Ashlyn watched a woman she had gladly called friend walk away, following after Leigh and her companions. A pang of fear hit the normally fearless queen. She sent a prayer to whomever would listen that Leigh would succeed in saving her daughter and Cullen. She also prayed for the war to end. Her hands dropped to her stomach and she rubbed them gently over it.

"I want you born in a land free of war little one. Maker please, please bring us peace."

OoO

"We march to the River Dane to hold those Orleasian bastards at bay. The Dalish will meet us there and bolster our numbers."

"Aye Ser Hawke." Carver hated the fact he had to leave his sisters and wife behind to face the coming threat from their neighboring country. When the king asked him to lead his army Carver had wanted to say no, but Leigh had told him to go. She told him he had to make his own way in life and he was born to command the king's army. Seeing his sisters leave without him hurt more than he would ever let on. He use to wish they both would just go away, but when he thought they were dead he wished nothing more than to have them back.

"Carver!"

"Nathaniel, what are you doing here?"

"My wife's clan is the one who will be bolstering your army so Alistair thought it was a good idea I come along, just in case." Carver turned back to his squire and yelled.

"Get Arl Howe a horse Micah. He rides with us."

"Aye my lord." The boy ran off to find an extra horse.

"Do you really think they will try something?"

"If they do we will kick their snobby arses back across the river. We both have faced a far worse foe, so they should be no problem."

"Fighting darkspawn is much harder isn't it?" Carver snickered and patted the older man on the shoulder. Micah led a freshly tacked horse up to where the men were standing. Carver lifted himself into his saddle and waited for Nate to do the same. Once the Warden was settled Carver raised his sword high and yelled.

"Move out!" The king's army began to move out from Denerim. Alistair watched they leave from his window. His heart felt heavy sending his men out without him. A soft hand winding into his made him sigh.

"Carver will see them through this." Alistair met his wife's gaze and gave a short nod. Ashlyn reached up and cupped her husband's cheek. "We have to stay here. I want to be out there with them too...but..."

"But what?"

"I have been feeling off these last few weeks. I asked Anders to check me over and..."

"Maker, please...don't tell me you're sick. Why didn't you tell me earlier?"

"I'm not sick my love...I'm pregnant." A look of joy and horror passed over Alistair's face. Ashlyn let out a small giggle as her husband picked her up and gave her a small spin.

"I...how?"

"My thoughts are it is because of what Meghan did. She killed the Taint in our blood so..."

"So we can have another child. What did Anders say?"

"He said the baby is strong and healthy. He wants me to stay as unstressed as possible, but he thinks I will not have the same problems I had with having Duncan. The morning sickness is nowhere near as bad."

"That's good news, I don't think I could take you going through all that again."

"I for one would go through worse if it meant having your children. The sickness was worth it to have Duncan here."

"You always were a masochist my love. Well, now I know why you asked me to stay here instead of going with our men."

"I...I did not want to, but..."

"Ash, I would rather be here with you protecting our family. I trust Carver and Nathaniel to lead our men. I am sure they can hold off the Orlesian. The ones I worry for are Hawke and her group. They have no idea what they will be walking into. That place was a pain in the arse without having to face an all powerful demon. I can't imagine what she has set up to try and kill them."

"Leigh is smart Alistair. She will prevail...I have faith she will."

"This coming from a woman who said the only things she ever had faith in were her daggers and her hound when I met her."

"Having survived what we did and having the life I have now, well, one tends to find they are grateful. Speaking with Pash also gave me a lot of insight into everything."

"Pash? Oh, you mean the spirit that lives in Hawke. I forgot she called her that." Ashlyn leaned back against her husband's chest and let out a weary sigh. "All we can do now is wait and pray."

"Let's hope the Maker hears us." The king and queen stared out into the morning sunlight in silence. The fate of Ferelden, of Thedas was no longer in their hands.

OoO

Sebastian watched Anders pace in the fire light. They had rode till the sun had long set, but the fog had started settling in and it was unwise to continue traveling. Leigh had volunteered to go hunt for dinner leaving him with the others. Bethany had been very quiet and withdrawn. He could not blame the younger Hawke, he knew that the man she loves was now in the hands of the Divine. His own fears for Meghan had not overshadowed his sympathy for Bethany. The one he had no idea about was Morrigan. She stayed on the other end of the camp away from everyone. The only person he had seen her talk to was Leigh. He could tell Fenris did not like her, but his feelings toward mages could have been the reason. Still the woman's golden eyes unnerved him and her quiet demeanor was colder than anyone's he had ever known. He hoped that she was going to be useful for his daughter's sake.

"Blondie you will wear a hole in the earth if you don't stop pacing." Anders threw Isabela a hard glare and continued to pace. Isabela let out a heavy sigh and leaned herself against Fenris.

"Not that I am complaining Izzy, but why did you come with us?" The pirate turned to Bethany and shrugged.

"I'm not sure really. I did not want Fenris to have to do this alone and I owe your sister for saving my sorry ass with the Qunari. I know I am not the most trustworthy person, but you are all my friends Sunshine. I don't leave my friends to fight impossible odds alone."

"And for that I am very grateful." All heads turned and found Leigh had returned. A few rabbits slung over her shoulder and Sebastian's bow in her hand.

"Well aren't you resourceful. Is there anything you can't do Hawke?"

"I can't put my hand through a person's chest like Fenris can." The elf snickered and shook his head.

"So that is the only thing you can't do?" Leigh knew what Isabela was trying to do and she loved the pirate for it. She was trying to keep her mind off of the fact her daughter was in the hands of a demon.

"Bela leave her be." Isabela turned and pouted at Fenris, but kept herself quiet. Leigh place her kills down on a flat rock and began to skin them. She felt Anders hovering over her, but she made no move to acknowledge his presence. She kept her mind on her task even as tears threatened to flow. Her hands began to shake violently and Anders put his hands over them.

"Let me do that."

"I need to keep busy or I will..."

"Then let me help." She did not trust her voice and just nodded. It did not take them long to get the rabbits set on the spit over the fire. Anders settled himself next to her and wrapped his arm around his wife. He knew no words would make either of them feel any less afraid. He looked up and saw Sebastian looked just as lost as they did. Bethany looked no better.

"How far did Ashlyn say this place was?"

"About three days ride if we stop and make camp at night. She gave me a map of the mountains that gives us a few options on how to approach the town. I expect that it is crawling with Seekers and Templars. We have to be careful. I can take on maybe a dozen Templars before their talents start stealing my magic. We need to use stealth first, force second. I don't want them to get the upper hand."

"I am not as good with daggers as you and Isabela are Hawke."

"I know, that is why I want you to be our cover along with Anders, Morrigan and Bethany. They know spells that are quiet and can incapacitate our targets. You can shoot them with your arrows."

"So I guess it is up to you, me and Fenris then to take them out."

"Yes, Fenris can use his ghost form to end them quickly. He is quite silent on his feet for a warrior."

"I will do what ever you need Hawke."

"Alright then, so which path are we going to take to get up there?" Leigh pulled the map from her pack and laid it out for the group to see. The spent the next few hours going over their plan. Morrigan even joined their little meeting, but stayed silent. Her eyes had a far off look to them and Leigh wondered if she was thinking about her mother or something else. Morning came and the group set off again with plans in their head on how they were going to pull this off.

OoO

Alistair sat on his throne late on the second night since his army had marched to the boarder of Orlais. Ashlyn had retired to their chambers, but the king could not sleep. He was restless and felt like he was abandoning his men. Even though he trusted Carver and the others, he was the king and should be leading his men into battle. He let out a heavy sigh and sank deeper into the throne. A small meow broke him from his thoughts and he looked to see a black kitten sitting a few feet away staring at him. He recognized the animal as Meghan's pet.

"Miss your girl don't you?" The kitten mewed and padded up the throne. Alistair had always been more of a dog person so cats were a mystery to him. He stilled as the small black ball of fluff jumped into his lap and curled itself up upon him. "I will take this as a yes." The kitten purred and nuzzled it's face on Alistair's shirt. "Any port in a storm huh? I saw you sitting in my wife's lap earlier today and I'm...talking to a cat. Maker, I need some sleep." A sound made Alistair look up from the cat and he caught sight of a figure keeping itself to the shadows. "Show yourself!"

"Looks like the Bastard King is all alone and without a stitch of armor. How wonderful." The kitten hissed and let out a low growl when the figure showed themselves. It was a man dressed in light Templar leathers. His eyes were cold and had a evil glint to them.

"Let me guess, you're one of the Divine's little demon possessed or just another person who fell for her lies."

"Hold your tongue heretic. The Divine is trying to save us from those accursed mages and their Void drawn powers. You have harbored them in this shithole of a country and now it is time for you to die. I will enjoy this." Alistair jumped to his feet sending the cat flying. The assassin lunged at him with daggers laced with a deadly poison. Alistair rolled to his left and dived for the hidden dagger his wife kept behind her throne. He thanked the Maker his wife was paranoid as his hand landed on the hilt. The assassin began to laugh manically seeing Alistair had armed himself. "You expect to stop me with that pig sticker?"

"No, but I will." Alistair and the assassin both turned to see a boy in his early teens standing before them. Balls of lightning cracked in his palms and he smiled. "Now step away from him or I will make sure you will meet the Maker long before he does."

"You filthy little..." The boy threw his spell and hit the assassin square in the chest. The scream that came from the man was deafening. Alistair moved to stand beside the young man, but kept his dagger ready in case the assassin had any ideas to try to kill them again. "You think this...will..stop...me. I will see you both dead." The assassin tried to get to his feet only to have his throat slit.

"Are you both alright?" Alistair heaved a sigh of relief in hearing Ashlyn's voice. Her dagger was covered in blood of the assassin. She had come looking for her husband after she woke and found his side of the the bed stone cold. The assassin's scream made her run for the throne room.

"I think so. The Divine must be desperate to send a hired killer here."

"Hawke had said that she was afraid and angry. I am just glad you remembered about the hidden dagger and my training against assassins."

"I would have been dead if not for this young man. Though I don't remember ever seeing him around here before." Ashlyn looked the boy over trying to remember if she had seen him before. His hair was jet black, his skin was sunkissed much like Alistair's, but his eyes...Ashlyn's hand went up to cover her mouth to stop the scream she wanted to let out.

"You're..."

"Talisen, Your Highness." Alistair looked back and forth between the two confused.

"Ash?"

"Talisen is Morrigan's son...your son." Alistair spun and stared at the young man who had saved his life. The boy had his mother's hair and eyes, but the facial features and skin color of his father. The boy grinned at them both and Ashlyn sank to her knees. Tears sprang to her eyes and the boy's grin faded. His expression was just like his father's and Ashlyn began to cry and laugh at the same time. Both men looked at her like she had gone crazy. "She said you were in a safe place I never imagined she meant here. Where in the Maker's name have you been hiding.

"In plain sight." The boy waved his hands and his body shrunk down. Magic churned around him till nothing was left of the boy that had been standing there. Instead there was a small black kitten with deep yellow eyes. Ashlyn shook her head and wiped the tears from her eyes.

"He has been here for months. How did none of us know?" Talisen changed back so he could explain.

"Meghan knew and I was surprised that her mother or father did not sense me. My mother sent me here to keep me safe. She feared Flemeth would try to take me."

"Why didn't she just come to us, we would have helped both of you. I owe your mother for saving my life, your father's life. I would have done everything in my power to protect you."

"Mother thought she had caused you enough pain and I did not know if...if I was wanted." Alistair placed both his hands on his oldest son's shoulders and smiled.

"You are very much wanted here. My father gave me up and I never got the chance to meet him, to get to know him. I have thought about you everyday and you are always welcome here."

"I don't want...I'm not meant to be royalty. I don't want the throne. I just want to be."

"Believe me I understand, I did not want this either. If that is your wish Talisen then that is what will be. You have nothing to fear anymore Flemeth is dead. You and your mother no longer have to hide."

"I know and for that I am grateful. It has been a lonely life for both of us. Mother never would admit it, but she missed her one and only friend very much." Ashlyn smiled warmly at the boy. As much as what Morrigan did hurt she had done it for the right reasons.

"I missed her too. I hope both of you will stay at least for a while once this is all over...if it is ever over."

"Do you think they can stop her?"

"If anyone can it would be them. Anders is a survivor, your mother is wicked with her spells and Isabela can get herself out of any tight spot she finds herself in. Not to mention you have the Hawke sisters and Fenris. The Divine does not have a chance in the Void."

"I hope Meghan is alright."

"You said she knew you were a human, not a cat. How?"

"She is more in tune with magic than most. She is the one who taught me how to use the lightning spell. My mother did not lie about me not being able to anything but shapechange. She did not know I had learned from Meghan. The girl has power. Even her mother could not match her magic if she decided to use it to it's full power. She saw right through my spell, but told no one what I was. I'm not sure why. She said she understood why I was hiding and would take care of me." Alistair heard people beginning to make their way to the throne room. The last thing they needed was for someone to see Talisen right now. The boy had said he did not want the throne and by the Maker his father would honor his wishes.

"Ash someone is coming. We need to get him into hiding." Talisen grinned and waved his hands. His body shrank again and turned back into the black ball of fluff be had been earlier. "Well that works."

"I will take him back to our chambers. Once you finish with the guard and Eamon come and join us. I think the three of us have a lot to talk about."

"I think we do too. I have a son to get to know." Ashlyn picked up the kitten and slipped back into the shadows before the guards showed.

"My King are you alright?!"

"I'm fine. Can't say the same for the assassin." Eamon winced seeing the large pool of blood around the dead man.

"How did he get in the castle?"

"Don't know Eamon, but I am sure he won't be the last to try. We hit a nerve with the Divine and the zealots."

"Alistair this is not a game. We might have bend to their wishes for a time just to make sure..." Alistair put his hand up to silence his mentor.

"No Eamon, I will not bend to them. Nor will I go back on my word to the mages and their families."

"My boy this will not end well."

"You have to have faith Eamon."

"Alistair..."

"Enough. I know I am not my father or even my brother, but I will not change my mind and don't try going to Ashlyn either she feels just as do."

"You are willing to die or worse for these mages?"

"Seeing as Connor is a mage I would think you would understand why I am willing to do this. It is not just for the mages. This is to right a wrong that should never have happened. We have been lied to about what Andraste wanted for us. I for one am willing to give Hawke the time to face the Divine."

"I...I'm sorry, I just don't want to see you get hurt or worse for this. If Hawke fails, if our army can't hold off Orlais, the Divine will make an example of Ferelden. Starting with you and your family. I'm an old man Alistair. I don't care what happens to me, but to you...your wife, your son. It would break my heart to lose any of you." Alistair's expression softened and he clapped his large hand on his mentor's shoulder.

"I worry about that everyday, but to live in fear gives power to those who would do evil. I can't give into it or it will rule me. If I do I am not better than Loghain."

"You remind me so much of your father. He never did things the easy way either, nor did he care what people thought of him. Well save your mother, he did care about her perception of him."

"Wish I could have known them both."

"They would be proud of you. That I am sure of." Eamon looked at the body of the assassin one more time before motioning to the guards to remove it. "Go get some sleep. I am sure this will be a long string of days. Conner is coming here tomorrow from the Tower since you seem to have lost most of your mages. He is excited to see here again."

"I bet he is taller than you by now."

"Only just. It makes me feel old. My son is now a man."

"I am thankful Duncan is still a child. I am not ready for him to be all grown up."

"Before you know it we will be calling him king and attending his coronation. Enjoy the time while you can." Alistair smiled and bid his mentor goodnight before walking toward the hall that lead to his chambers. He was happy to find his wife sitting by the fire talking to Talisen. The two were sharing stories of Morrigan and their adventures during the Blight. He silently stood in the shadows and watched.

OoO

Cullen sat against the wall of his cell. His body ached from the beating he had taken by the Divine's Templars. Everyday he had been here they tried to break him, body, mind and soul. It was something he had experience in, but this was far worse than what happened in Kinloch. They had broken his ribs only to heal them and re-break them again. He feared to sleep even with Valor watching over him in the Fade. He heard footsteps coming down the hall and his breath caught in his lungs. He tried to harden his expression to show he was not afraid, but inside he wished that they would just kill him and get it over with. His gaze rose to meet whomever was going to be his next tormentor,but the footsteps stopped and he heard was the sound of the Templar cursing.

"Knock it off brat!" Cullen jumped to his feet and put his forehead against the cell bars. He saw a Templar struggling to contain the small child. He caught sight of red hair and knew it was Meghan. She was beating her tiny fists about the Templar's unhelmed face. The man struggled not to drop her, but was losing that battle. Meghan sent out a jolt of electricity into the man and he fell heavily to the ground. The little girl rolled away from the fallen man and tried to run. Another Templar grasped her from behind and picked her up.

"Let me go!"

"Not a chance. The Divine has plans for you brat." Cullen raged against the bars of his cell. He did not care what they did to him, but he would be damned if he let them hurt an innocent child. A child that was soon to be his niece, if he survived this and got back to Bethany. The Templar opened the cell next to Cullen's and tossed the little girl in. "Can't wait to see what she does to you. Filthy mage." Meghan scurried to the back of her cell, burying her head in her knees and began to cry. The Templar's laughter echoed of the dungeon walls as he walked away.

"Meghan, sweetheart look at me." The little girl lifted her head from her knees and looked over to Cullen.

"Uncle Cullen?"

"It's me honey. Come here." Meghan slowly made her way to the bars that separated their cells. Cullen dropped to his knee and reached out his hand our through the bars. The little girl looked at him and slowly let her fingertips brush his hand. All his pains eased and Meghan looked up at him and smiled.

"No more hurt." Cullen wanted to laugh, but could only nod.

"No more hurt. Did they hurt you?"

"No, where is Mum and Da?"

"They are coming to help us. I need you to be brave for me alright? There are people here that mean us harm."

"I will be brave. They hurt Mimi, made her mean."

"I know, it's not her fault little one. The Divine..." Cullen felt a chill run up his spine and his eyes shifted to see Strife standing by the cell bars smiling evilly.

"Oh please don't stop talking on my account. I so want to hear what you have to say Ser Cullen."

"What I want to say I can't in front of the girl." The Divine knelt down and cooed at Meghan, but the girl made no move to come closer.

"Such a shy child. I will not hurt you my dear. Come closer." Cullen made a grab for the Divine's hand only to have his own burned by a fire spell. "Do not touch me mortal. I will make you wish I had killed you." Cullen hissed in pain and cradled his burnt hand to his chest.

"If you hurt her I swear I will kill you."

"Such devotion to a mage. It is a shame that you could not be persuaded to join us. It would have been less painful."

"I would rather die than become an abomination like you." The Divine sneered and her hand snaked out to throw a spell. Cullen felt like she was tearing him apart and he could not stop the scream that passed his lips. Meghan's own scream echoed through the chamber and she ran at the woman. She hurled an ice spell at her making the woman jump back.

"Impossible they drained your mana." Meghan glared at the woman. "Or could it be you are like the others who have tried to stop me before? Oh how perfect, I can stop this before it even becomes a bother."

"You're mean!" Strife laughed loud and darkly.

"I think I know just what greeting I should have for your mother. I wonder what she would do if she found you with the sun brand upon your brow." Cullen growled and pulled a the bars with his good hand.

"Leigh will make you regret ever being, Strife. She will defeat you."

"I doubt it. Many have tried. Do you really think she was the first? Each time they came and each time I defeated them. I will not lose to a mortal especially one who does not possess the power this little one does. I have reined for over a thousand years" The Divine wheeled on her heels and barked orders to her men. "Prepare the chamber for the Right of Tranquility. I want Hawke to see her child marked by my hand."

"Yes, Your Grace." Once the Templars had left Meghan placed her small hand on the cell bars and melted the iron. The space was just enough for her to crawl through. Once she was on the other side she went to Cullen. Her hand glowed with healing magic and Cullen felt his burnt flesh begin to cool.

"I won't let them take you Meghan. I promise they will not get their hands on you." Meghan looked up into his eyes and Cullen saw no sign of fear. "You're not afraid?"

"No, they can't hurt me." Cullen looked confused, but Meghan only smiled and curled into his lap. Her fingers traced a rune on his forehead and a sense of great calm washed over him. "Now you are like the rest of us."

"The rest of you?"

"Mum and Da have the same mark on them."

"And this mark is...?"

"The Maker's Blessing."

"We could use that right about now." Even with the calm in his heart Cullen was worried. He was unarmed and outnumbered. How could he protect Meghan if they tried to take her to be made Tranquil? He prayed Leigh made it there in time. He did not want to think of the alternative for either of them if she didn't.


	53. Chapter 53

**First I want to apologize for how long this has taken me to write and I want to thank my readers for sticking with me. I have had a really bad case of writer's block for not just this story, but all of them. Life and work has also played a huge part in me not sitting down and writing more. I have the next chapter mostly written so I hope it will not be another three months between. As for my other stories, I will be getting back to them soon. Thank you again for your support and endless patience with me. Your reviews and favs have kept me going. **

**Lots of love,**

**Raven**

Sebastian watched from his perch on the rocks and waited. An arrow was notched, ready to find it's mark when he saw the signal. The group of them had made good time getting to Haven. It was almost like the Maker had cleared and and all obstacles from their path. The plan they had put into place was working so far. He could see from his position where Anders and Bethany had placed themselves. Morrigan was harder to spot, but he knew she was out there somewhere. He had lost sight of the other three as soon as they entered the village. His lips moved in silent prayer when the first bought of smoke went into the air. The glint of Templar armor caught his eye and her let the arrow fly. The body dropped like a stone and he quickly notched another arrow. Flashes of magic went off here and there making it hard to keep his aim true.

"Maker guide my hand." Out of the corner of his eye he saw Anders jump down from his perch. The eerie glow of his magic encased his hands as he threw a lightning spell. Sebastian cursed and left his hiding place too. Once he was on the ground he saw why Anders had moved. Isabela was on the ground holding Fenris in her arms. He had a very large gash on his torso that was oozing blood at a fast rate. Anders caught the flash of white from Sebastian's armor and yelled over his shoulder.

"Cover us!" The prince ran up and kept his eyes trained on the village. Bethany had also moved from her hiding place and was standing guard over Anders and Fenris.

"Where is my sister?" Isabela shook her head.

"Not sure once the smoke went up we got separated."

"I have to go find her." Isabela grabbed the young mage's arm and held her to the spot.

"Your sister will be fine. We don't need to be worrying about you running off and getting yourself killed. Just stay here. I'm sure Hawke will be here any second now." Anders felt the chill of Templar magic just seconds before it stripped him of his. He was thankful he had healed worst of the damage before they had found them.

"We have company." Anders stood up and pulled Fenris up with him. He could see the horrified look on Bethany's face as her magic sputtered out too. Out of the smoke at least a dozen Templars and Seekers stalked. Sebastian saw one he recognized. The leader was none other than Cassandra Pentagast, the Seeker who had come to Starkhaven looking for Hawke and Anders.

"Prince Vael what a surprise to see you here on Ferelden soil." Her gaze turned and caught sight of Anders. A slow evil smile graced her lips. "And in the company of a murderer no less. I am very surprised. I thought you were one of the faithful." Sebastian raise himself to his full height and glared at the woman.

"The only murderers I see are the ones in front of me wreathed in heavy armor. Let us pass Seeker or I promise you will regret it." The Seeker let out a mirthless laugh and stepped a little closer.

"You are in no position to demand anything Prince Vael. You will hand over the apostates and come quietly. The Divine will show mercy." It was Sebastian's turn to laugh. Anders stiffened thinking the man was actually thinking of turning him and Beth over.

"I know of the Divine's mercy...I think I will pass. Now move Seeker or be moved." Cassandra opened her mouth, but the sound of a inhuman groan made all eyes turn to the left. A Templar stumbled out of the smoke. His eyes looked pained though Sebastian could not see any wounds on the man. The man's gate was choppy and strained. Cassandra rolled her eyes and motioned for some of the other Templars to help the groaning man.

"What is wrong?" The Templar opened his mouth to speak, but doubled over in pain. Anders' magic began to return slowly, but it was enough to see what afflicted the Templar.

"Shit! Take cover he is going to blow!" Before anyone could move a bright sizzling light took over the groaning Templar right before his body exploded. A shield went up around Anders and the others, while the Templars were left exposed to the blood and gore that rained down.

"What in the Maker's name was that?!" Anders grimaced and looked away from the scene in front of them before answering the prince.

"It is called a walking bomb. A mage puts magic energy into a person and it builds till the person explodes." Beth looked ill as did Isabela. Fenris growled and Sebastian said a small prayer.

"Why would someone do that? It is barbaric!"

"I've only ever seen it done, I have never done it myself." The Templars were in shock. Some screaming, others standing covered in gore just staring at what was left of their fellow Templar. Pieces of bone and armor had injured most of them. Even the Seeker who was standing the furthest away had bone shrapnel wounds on her face and body. Anders felt the shield dissipate leaving them exposed. The Seeker turned her wild eyes to the group in front of her and she screamed.

"You will pay for that murderer!" Her eyes were staring right at Anders.

"He had nothing to do with it." Leigh appeared next to her group half carrying Morrigan who looked severely injured. "Anders, Beth please." Anders took the witch from his wife and began calling forth his healing magic. Leigh tried not to let the scene in front of her turn her stomach. She had witnessed Morrigan cast the walking bomb spell on the man, but knew it was more in self defense than in malice. Leigh had disarmed the Templar and told him to run. The man repaid her by trying to stab her from behind and would have succeeded if not for Morrigan jumping in front of the blade.

"Ah, the Champion. I was wondering if you would be here as well."

"The Divine stole my daughter. I have come to get her back." The Seeker's eyes shown confusion. "_She does not know." "I can see that much." "She is a pawn in this Leigh, it is not her fault." "She stands with Strife, she shares her fate. I will not be kept from my child." _Pash fell silent, knowing she could not talk her host out of ripping this place apart if that is what Leigh wished to do. "Now I will give you the same chance I gave your fellow Templar. He chose to attack me after I spared his life. His death is his own fault." Red cracks formed in Leigh's skin and her eyes shifted from silver to crimson. Magic built in her body until it wreathed around her, spinning like a brilliant hurricane. "Leave now and save yourselves or stay and die fighting a force you can't win against. Choose!" Cassandra backed away and the other Templars with her began to run.

"What are you?" The question came out in a whisper, but Leigh heard her.

"I am the just a mage who wants her freedom, her family and her life." Leigh lifted her hand and the house next to Cassandra exploded into timber. "We will not be bullied anymore. We will not be taken from our families anymore and we will not be slaves anymore!" Most of the Templars had run screaming by that point. If she was in the right mind she would admire the Seeker for her courage. Most people would have run by now, faced with a foe they could not hope to defeat. Leigh's eyes turned sad for a moment as she stared at the armored woman. In a soft voice that was a mix of hers and Mercy's she begged Cassandra to go. The Seeker nodded and ran after her men. Leigh waited til she could feel they were gone before letting her magic slip back into herself. She turned to see how Morrigan was and saw Anders closing the woman's eyes.

"She...she's gone."

"What? How?" Leigh ran and knelt next to the witch. She saw the wound was mostly closed, but the skin around it was very discolored. "That bastard poisoned his blade."

"He nicked her heart Leigh. If I had gotten to her sooner...I'm so sorry." Leigh let tears run down her cheeks, but harshly wiped them away. Now was not time to cry and mourn. She was here to get her daughter and to end the Divine's life. Leigh took off her cloak and laid it over the witch's body. It was almost funny to her how many times she had done this. How many people she had laid to rest or have died around her. Death was a part of her life just as much as magic was. She hated it. Hated that good people have died for nothing but pride and hatred.

"Maker take you into his arms Morrigan. I swear I will make your sacrifice mean something." Quickly she jumped to her feet and stormed off through the smoking village. The others followed quickly after her leaving Morrigan's body behind.

"Hawke wait!"

"What?" Fenris winced seeing the pure anger on Leigh's face. He had never seen her like this.

"We need a plan. We can't just march up there. What if there are more Templars?" Leigh's glare softened and she nodded her head. She knew he spoke the truth, but her heart was telling her to rush forward. They had already lost one of their group. Her head won over the throbbing of her heart. She was not willing to lose anyone else to her anger and fear.

"You're right. We need a diversion to see if we can flush the rest of them out. Any volunteers?"

OoO

Carver's arms felt like jelly. As soon as his army reached the River Dane the Orlesian were on them. That had been three days ago. The battles were going in his favor, but he had lost a lot of men. If it had not been for the Dalish and their army Ferelden would be over run. The Orlesians had retreated back across the river to lick their wounds giving his army time to rest and heal the wounded, count the dead. So many dead. He had never want to see this side of war again, but the Maker has seen fit that he did. Carver walked the encampment hearing men scream as the mages tried to heal their wounds. It was almost to much for him the bare.

"Carver!" Joy and anger swept over him as he saw his wife running through the camp. When she finally reached him he picked her up and crushed her too him.

"Ori, you shouldn't be here."

"I couldn't leave you to fight this alone."

"If something happens to you..." His wife made a face at him. He knew that look all to well and he braced for the dress down she was about to unleash.

"And what am I to do? Wait for you to come home. What if you don't? If I die then it will be here with you Carver Hawke. I will not sit by when I can help." Carver heard the sound of armored footfalls and looked up from his wife's face.

"You'd better just let her help son or she follow you to the Void if she has to. just to nag." A small group of Templars stood behind Ori, led by her father Ser Gregior. "We will lend what ever aid we can. The mages from Kinloch are also here to fight." Carver looked over and saw the mages running through the camp. The light from spells could be seen popping up here and there. Carver breathed a sigh of relief as the screams of the injured began to lessen.

"Seems they're helping already."

"Have you put a dent in their lines?" Carver motioned for his wife and her father to follow him to the war tent. Reports and maps were scattered on the wooden table and Nathaniel was leaning over it trying to make sense of it all. His wife Shyira was with him trying to help. The older man looked up from his parchment and smiled.

"Well?"

"From what our scouts can see the Orlesians are hurting far worse than we are. They have no mages to heal their wounded, no mages to throw spells to cover their men. With the addition of the knights and the mages for us we should be able to end this soon."

"How soon? Days, weeks?" Nathaniel shrugged.

"At best a day or two, at worst a week. They have no allies and are being hit from the back end by the Tevinter army. The word is the Empress is in hiding and most of her advisers are dead."

"Never thought I would see the day the Tevinters would be helping free people. Amazing isn't it?" Ori nodded at her father. She could see Carver more clearly in the candle light and could see he looked tired.

"Carver why don't you try to get some rest."

"I'm alright Ori," Nathaniel could see Carver was dead on his feet. He was thankful for the Grey Warden stamina even if the taint had been lifted from his blood. Somehow all of the good effects stayed and the bad were washed away.

"Carver go get some sleep, I can run things til you get up. A tired leader makes mistakes."

"Alright, thanks Nate. If anything should happen..."

"I'll come get you. This is your army Carver. I'm just here to help." The younger man smiled and took his wife's hand.

"Wake me at dawn." With that Carver led his wife to his tent. As much as her presence worried him, he was glad she had come to help. It hurt seeing Nathaniel and his wife standing together and he was there without his other half.

"Are you still mad I came?" Carver quickly took off his armor and wrapped his arms around Ori's thin frame.

"No, I am glad really. I hated leaving you behind. We have been together since Ostagar, it just didn't seem right you not being at my side." Ori turned in his arms and faced him. A loving smile graced her lips and she buried her face against his broad chest.

"Any news?"

"No, but if I know my sister she has that bitch cornered by now. Leigh is not one to sit back and let what the Divine did slide. I pity the woman really."

"She deserves what she gets. This has gone on too long." Carver let Ori go, but held on to her hand. This might be his last night on Thedas with his wife and he was not going to waste it. "Carver?"

"I've missed you and want to make this a night to remember."

"Then we should waste no more time with talk then." Carver leaned down and kissed her passionately. He lead her back to the furs that made his bed and watched her blow out the candles that lined his small table.

OoO

Leigh let out a inhuman roar as she charged one of the Templars that was guarding the Chantry in Haven. The man did not even get a chance to draw his sword before he was on the ground dead. The other Templars closed ranks in front of the Divine with weapons drawn. Their faces hidden by their helms, but Leigh knew they were afraid. Anders stepped over the dead knight and took his place next to his wife. Sebastian was the last to enter the room and took his place next to Anders. Sebastian scanned the room in search of his daughter, but could see no sign of her or Cullen. His gaze met Leigh's and he shook his head. The Divine rose from her throne and walked to the end of the raised dais.

"Welcome." Leigh took one step forward her eyes glowing red and the Templars took a step back.

"Where is my daughter?!" The older woman smiled and motioned for her guards to stand down.

"She is safe for now. It is up to you if you want her to stay that way. She is an apostate and it is our right to take her to be trained." Anders' hands balling into fists and his skin began to crack open letting blue light spill from it.

"You have not right demon! She is a child and innocent in all this! You want a prisoner you should have taken one that could fight back, you bloody coward!" The smile on the Divine's face faltered a bit, but she recovered quickly.

"What stories you tell. If there is a demon in this room it is you mage." Anders took a step to charge forward, but Sebastian caught his arm. "I know who you are. You are the one who destroyed the Chantry in Kirkwall. You are a murderer and will pay for what you have done." Leigh placed a calming hand on her husband's chest and turned to face the Divine.

"He did not kill anyone. It is you who pay for what you have done Strife. You have more blood on your hands than he ever will." Shock shone in the older woman's eyes.

"What did you call me?" Leigh grinned.

"I called you Strife. I know what you are, what you have done and I will not let you get away with this any longer. You persecuted mages, killed Andraste's daughters and now because you are losing your control over Thedas you decide to kidnap people." The Templars turned their heads and saw the Divine's pious facade fail. Rage shone in her face as well as fear.

"How do you know that name?! Who are you?"

"You never found this place did you? The only reason you know it was here was because of Brother Genitivi, but the Wardens had already searched the place. They found ancient scrolls written by the very people you feared. I think you know the rest. The Wardens gave the scrolls to a sister who deciphered it. When she sent a copy of the text to you, you had her marked for death. You picked the wrong group of assassins to do it. You see they group in Ferelden was led by the very Warden who gave the scroll to the sister. Must have really made you angry when you found out they failed the contract or should I say refused to take the orders."

"Quite a story Serah Hawke, but I don't see how..."

"You don't see how I know what you are. Oh that is another story and I want to see if you can figure it out on your own. I want my daughter back now and maybe I will give you a quick death!" Leigh drew her daggers and took a menacing step forward. Half the Templars moved to protect the Divine, but the others did not move. The Divine growled in rage and screamed orders to the men before backing up. Even with the odds against them the three did not back down. They had to buy time for the rest of their group. Leigh just hoped they were having more luck than they were.

OoO

Bethany hurled a fire ball at a group of Templars. Their screams died out as Fenris and Isabela cut through them as they burned. The three of them searched the mountain caves for the dungeons that held Cullen and Meghan. It helped they had gotten detailed maps and descriptions from both Ashlyn and Leliana. Isabela pulled the map out and checked their position.

"Maker there are a lot of tunnels in this place." Bethany paced in annoyance behind the pirate queen wanting nothing more than to just find the man she loves and her niece. "It looks like we are here. Ashlyn said there were pens back up that path. They were used to keep drakes and baby dragons. Maybe they were converted to holding cells." Fenris nodded and began heading in the direction of the pens.

"Worth a look." A shrill scream echoed in the caves making the three jump. "That sounded like a child." Bethany broke out into a dead run followed closely by the elf and the pirate. Isabela shared a worried look with Fenris as they ran. Both knowing that there was only one person that could have made that scream.

"Meghan."

OoO

Cullen placed himself between Leigh's child and the Templars that were now in front of the cell they were held in. Their leader was a man Cullen knew well enough from his days in the Tower. He made Ser Alrik look like a kitten. Rolen and Addler had been his friends and Cullen knew this man would love nothing more than to take out his hatred of mages of the child behind him. The click of the lock made Cullen stiffen his stance as Meghan screamed in fear.

"You should have joined us Cullen." The man sneered showing broken yellow teeth.

"I would rather die than become what you are Ciro. I will not let you anywhere near this girl." Ciro let out a dark laugh and motioned for his men to move Cullen away. The first Templar made the mistake of not having his weapon ready and in hand. Cullen lunged forward slamming his elbow into the man's nose and spun around to take the Templar's sword. Being armed made him feel a little better, but he really wished he had his armor. Ciro grit his teeth in anger at the Templar as he stumbled backwards bleeding from his nose. With a quick motion Ciro slit the man's throat for his mistake.

"You sodding fool!" Cullen heard Meghan whimper at the site of the man's blood gushing from his body.

"You bastard! He did not deserve that!"

"Blame yourself Cullen. If you had just handed over that creature and died quietly he would still be alive." The other Templar had her sword drawn and made a quick move forward only to turn and run Ciro through. Shock plain on the man's face as she twisted the blade to do as much damage as she could. Cullen grabbed Meghan and shielded her from the sight.

"It's alright Meghan, just keep your eyes shut sweetheart." A heavy thud made Cullen look back at the woman. Ciro was dead, but his face was still twisted in fear and pain. From the amount of blood this killing was meant to cause pain. Cullen placed Meghan on the ground and turned to face he Templar. At this point he was not sure if she was friend or foe.

"I have waited years to do that." The woman yanked the helmet off her head and threw it aside. Dark hair fell back down to lay at her shoulders and bright eyes shined up at Cullen.

"Miranda!?" She went to take a step forward, but Cullen made a threatening move with his sword. He still remembered how she tricked him so they could capture him. "Don't you dare take a step closer. Miranda put her hands up and back off a few steps.

"Please let me explain." She moved slowly to take the armor she had on off. Under it was her Circle robes and Cullen noticed it was in tatters. She noticed his appraising gaze and sighed sadly. "They broke me. I will not go into detail since Meghan is here, but it was far worse than anything that I had ever endured. As soon as I was broken they forced me into the fade so I could be taken over by a demon."

"I guessed that much. Your eyes...but your body did not become twisted."

"The spirit I met in the Fade was not a demon. She...it's hard to explain. She is not whole, just a whisper of what she use to be. Even as weak as she was she shielded me from the demons until another woman came and healed my broken soul. She told me what I had to do to end this. All of us had to be here Cullen. Eight must stand together or it will never end. I knew it was dangerous to work both sides, but I had to. Please believe me. This nightmare has to end." In the back of his head Cullen heard Valor whisper. His arm dropped letting the sword tip touch the ground in peace, instead of up in aggression. Meghan smiled up at Miranda before running into the woman's arms.

"I missed you Mimi." Tears streaked down the older mage's cheeks as she hugged the little girl tightly.

"I missed you too little one. I'm sorry, so very sorry you have to be here."

"It's okay. We will win." Cullen heard the sound of running feet coming down the hallway. He moved to the door and nearly fell to his knees. Bethany threw herself into his arms and wrapped her arms tightly around him. "See." Miranda let out a small laugh and nodded to the girl. Isabela quirked her eyebrow up at Miranda when she saw the woman.

"Aren't you on their side?" Fenris' tattoos glowed, but Meghan held up her hand to stop his move forward.

"I would have been if not for some help." Bethany let herself shift back a bit to look at her cousin.

"Help?"

"Spirit help."

"Maker not you too." Miranda shrugged her shoulders and Meghan giggled. "Then why did you kidnap Cullen and Meghan?"

"All of us had to be here to end this. Compassion, Justice, Valor, Faith, Hope, Purity, Fortitude and lastly Courage. We can't lose this time. If we do it is over for mages. She will end us all if she wins just to stop someone from being born like Leigh, like Meghan. I had to make her think I was possessed by a demon. She is arrogant and could not help boasting about how Leigh could never beat her. That she was the Maker's chosen child and not even his daughters could stop her. She wanted Leigh here so she could kill her."

"Then we'd better get back to the others. Leigh is down at the Chantry buying us time to get here." Miranda nodded and rose to her feet. Her eyes fell to Ciro's body and she smiled.

"I have an idea."


	54. Chapter 54

Anders made a wild swing with his staff and sent a bolt of energy at the Divine. She laughed and batted the spell away. He was tired and drained from the fight with the Templars, but he would not go down without a fight. Leigh and Sebastian were trying to find an opening to attack her directly, but every time they moved she would throw a ward spell or attack Sebastian making Leigh have to protect him. Anders could see how frustrated his wife was getting. He knew her too well and knew she was holding back. If she wanted to she could use her magic to end this, but she held back. All he wondered was why. Was she buying the others time or was it because she was afraid to let go and unleash her full power.

"Leigh we can't keep this up much longer." Sebastian had burn marks on his armor and he was panting. All his strength and stamina was being sapped away. Leigh cursed and threw up her own warding spell. She saw the look of surprise on Strife's face. She was not expecting Leigh to be as strong as she was.

"Anders get him out of here. I will end this." With her other hand she placed a barrier to block both men from trying to stay. She had lost enough in life to know this was a hopeless battle.

"No! I will not leave you here to face her alone!" Leigh smiled at him with tears in her eyes. Even if she won it would take everything in her to do so. She would not lose either of them to this fight. Anders pounded his hands on the barrier a look of pure terror graced his face.

"Tell...tell Meghan, Karl and Drea I love them and I will be waiting for them on the other side."

"Love please don't do this, let me help you. Let me stay." She shook her head and gave him a sad smile.

"It's my turn to face the fire Anders. I have been safe while the rest of our kind has been enslaved. I have to do this and I have to do this alone. Please go...if I fail it is up to you and Sebastian to keep our children safe. I love you. You are my heart and soul. I...I need you to live, please go." Anders shook his head and Sebastian followed suit.

"We are not leaving Hawke. You can't stop her on your own. Even Mercy knew this. Remember the scroll, what Andraste said ""_When the virtues stand up against her as one she will not be able to stand. Purity must be protected or all hope is lost. Compassion for one's enemy is the greatest gift one can give in seeking justice. Courage and fortitude are needed to show one's valor in the darkest of times. Above all else faith is needed. Faith in yourself, your allies and the Maker himself. This is the only way to defeat Strife." Please let us help you." Leigh let the barrier on their side die. Anders ran to her and wrapped her up in his arms. _

_"__Don't ever do that to me again." _

_"__If we fail here there won't be a next time." Sebastian caught movement out of the corner of his eye and gasped. Four Templars filed in flanking Miranda Amell. In her arms was Meghan looking scared. Leigh wanted to run to her daughter, but the sight of a dagger near her daughter's throat made her stop._

_"__Ah Miranda, perfect timing. I take it Ser Cullen is dead." _

_"__He is. Pity, but he would not repent. We did have a few people try to save him, but they too are gone." Leigh let out a howl of anguish and Anders had to stop her from jumping at her cousin. Seeing the blood on two of the Templars armor proved it. One of the Templars had Bethany's staff, another had Fenris's sword. Leigh fell to her knees all the fight had left her. Her sister dead, her friends gone and now her daughter in the hands of a monster. Miranda stopped just in front of were Leigh and the men were standing._

_"__I am very pleased with that news." Strife turned to Leigh a wolfish grin on her face. "You see Serah Hawke, you can not win. You are beaten. Save yourself the pain and beg forgiveness. I will grant you all a quick death." Sebastian looked at his daughter and Strife turned her tone to honey._

_"__Do not worry Brother Vael. Your child will live. This body I am in will age and I will have to take over another. Her powers added to mine...there will be no one to stop me."_

_"__Monster!" Sebastian jumped at the Divine not caring that the warding spell was still up. Blind hatred drove him and he would rather die than let the demon take his little girl. When his dagger hit the ward it shattered and the cold steel pierced woman's arm. With a hiss she grabbed his arm and threw him back toward the others._

_"__Impossible!" Leigh could hear Pash laughing with glee in her head. "___When the virtues stand together she will fall. Look to the ones who wear our enemies' armor. Look closely Leigh." ___Leigh looked up and met the eyes of the Templar holding Bethany's staff. Warm brown eyes met hers and she let out small laugh. Bethany took her helm off and the other three did the same. Cullen, Fenris and Isabela smiled down at her. Miranda let the dull dagger fall to the ground and handed Meghan back to Anders. _

_"__Not impossible, we warned you that we would stop you Strife." Miranda's skin cracked open and green light poured out of the cracks. Her voice shifted into a very smooth alto. "Miranda had the courage to take your abuse and still not give in. She knew the dangers, but still she chose to fight back."_

_"__Who are you?!"_

_"__What's the matter Your Grace, do you not remember your first Knight Commander?" _

_"__No!" Leigh and Anders step up next to Miranda and let Pash and Justice take over. Blue and red joined the green light giving the room a eerie glow._

_"__Our mother gave us the answer years ago and we did not listen. Our failure was a lesson. It was costly and I will not give you another thousand years to inflict more horrors on this world."_

_"__So he made you spirits did he? Which are you murderer?" Anders smiled._

_"__Justice, I did warn you that the day you would be defeated Mercy and I would be here. It ends now Strife. He chose us as his vanguard. Here stand his two daughters. His flesh and blood. Who are you to claim you are his chosen? You gave up that title long ago when you turned from him. In murdering his daughters you sealed your fate."_

_"__What do you know of fate? He coddled mortals and forgot his first born. He turned his back on us."_

_"__So like a spoiled child you tormented your younger siblings. Did you not trust his love? Did you not think he gave mortals more of his time because they needed him more? He trusted his eldest to take care of the Fade while he watched over his youngest children. You are nothing but a bully."_

_"__He threw us away. He made us leave the Golden City because of you." Justice shook his head sadly and Mercy stepped forward._

_"__Like any father he made you leave so you could grow. He wanted only for you to learn and think for yourself. He loved you Grace. Part of him still does, but you have fallen so far and done things that are hard to forgive even for our father." _

_"__I will not stand here and listen to your preaching spirit." Strife's body began to shift and change. Mercy threw up a shield around them to stop the energy blast Strife threw before completing her change. When the smoke cleared a twisted figure stood before them. A pride demon, but smaller and thinner. Leigh could imagine that Grace was beautiful once before she let her malice twist her. "I will prove to him I am the only one worthy of his attention!"_

_"__Move!" Mercy put her hands together palm to fist and made her flaming long sword. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Isabela pick up Meghan and move her out of danger. With a flick of her wrist she put a barrier between the fight and Leigh's daughter. "Sebastian stay as far away as you can to cover us." The prince gave a sharp nod and fell back to safer position. His hand reached back to his quiver to ready an arrow. Bethany stood behind Cullen and waited for her chance to strike. Fenris stood in front of the barrier that Leigh had put around the pirate queen and Meghan. His tattoos glowed fueling the mages near him. Leigh, Miranda and Anders moved forward striking with spells, staffs and in Leigh's case daggers. Strife fell back and let out a ear piercing scream. Her magic pulsed out knocking her attackers off their feet and shaking the very building they were in._

_"__I will not be defeated by the likes of you. I have come too far to let mortals win." A evil sneer graced the demon's lips and she looked up at the ceiling. "This body might die, but I will return. Sending you to the Void will be worth the set back." Leigh gasped right before the building shook itself apart. Her eyes met Anders' and she reached for him, before the world went dark._

_OoO_

_Carver stood in front of his men. Most were tired and beaten up, but their eyes shone with a determination that made his heart swell with pride. Gregior and his men had joined the ranks of the soldiers giving a much needed boost to the battle weary army. The presence of the mages also gave them a better advantage. Most that were brought were seasoned veterans from the battle of Denerim. Carver smiled at his wife before putting his helm back on his head. _

_"__I know you are tired! I know we have lost men and supplies, but we have not lost any ground! They are hurting worse than we are! I have never been prouder of my countrymen as I am right now! We will win this battle! We will send those spoiled shits back to their Empress with their tails between their legs! And we will let all of Thedas know we will not be bullied into following a leader that harms innocents! Let's show them how we do things here in Ferelden!" The roar from his army was deafening. Ori shivered for a moment next to him. Her gaze met his and he grasped her hand in his. "Ready?"_

_"__As I will ever be." Carver let go of her hand and began to move to the back of his men. "Carver."_

_"__Yeah?"_

_"__I will see you on the other side. You'd better be there." _

_"__I promise. Just make sure you're there and I will not be far behind." Ori smiled and ran to join the other mages positioned to strike from cover. _

_OoO_

_Bethany groaned and rolled over onto her back. Pain blossomed in her left shoulder and her head lulled to that side. She could see a large shard of wood in her arm. She hissed as her right hand gripped the top of the shard. With a quick jerk she pulled it out biting her lip to stop the scream of pain. She lay panting there for what seemed like hours until she felt something touch her arm. She tried to jerk away from whatever was touching her, but the pain made it impossible._

_"__Aunt Bethy?" Bethany's eyes flew open and she let out a strangled sob._

_"__Meghan?" Warmth ebbed into her form the little girl's hands. Her wounds knitted themselves back together and the older mage was able to sit up. "Have you seen any of the others?"_

_"__Izzy and Fenris are looking for them." Bethany looked around and let out a startled gasp. The large stone and wood building that had been the Chantry here in Haven. From the debris it looked like the place had blown from the inside out. _

_"__Are you hurt sweetheart?" Meghan shook her head and stood up. "Where are you going?"_

_"__To find Mum and Da. It isn't over yet." Bethany jumped to her feet and followed the small girl. As they searched the sky lightened. Bethany knew the sun was going to be rising soon and she did not know if she was grateful for the coming dawn or scared about what they might find when the light came._

_"__Meghan?" The little girl had stopped dead in front of a pile of wood and stone. A man's hand peeked out from rubble and Bethany ran forward to shift the stone and wood off of whoever might have been buried. She tore at the rubble and dislodged Cullen from his stone prison. "Cullen! Love open your eyes!" Calling her healing magic into her hands she checked his injuries. She let out a sharp cry when she could not feel a heartbeat. "No, oh Maker please..." Meghan stepped closer to them and frowned. Her little hand reached out and touched the armor right over Cullen's heart. A jolt of magic passed between Meghan and Cullen. After a second Cullen gasped and began to cough. "Cullen!"_

_"__Beth..." Bethany let out a sob of relief and buried her face in the crook of Cullen's neck._

_"__You need to stop doing that to me." Cullen smiled a bit and sat up._

_"__Where are the others?" _

_"__I don't know. Meghan said Isabela and Fenris are trying to find them. I guess they were kept safe from the blast by the barrier Leigh put around them." Cullen stood up and pulled Bethany up with him. He looked around and shook his head sadly._

_"__All this destruction, all this death. How can she do this?"_

_"__I don't know." Meghan looked around for a moment before letting Cullen pick her up. Her eyes fell to the horizon and she smiled. The sun had just began to break over mountain._

_"__The light." Bethany gave her niece a questioning look. "The light, it is golden in color. He is here with us, watching."_

_"__He?"_

_"__The one who made us all. The Maker." Bethany and Cullen shared a look. The sound of a angry roar of in the distance made the three jump._

_"__That sounded like Anders." Bethany took off running followed closely by Cullen and Meghan. In the roar she heard anger, but she also heard anguish. She prayed she was wrong, but the scene they came upon gave the answer she did not want to know. Leigh was on the ground, her face ashen from blood lose. Anders stood in front of her facing Strife and trying to buy time for Miranda to heal his wife. Strife was injured, but she had a wicked smile on her face. Bethany ran for her sister only to be stopped by a well placed spirit bolt from Strife. The bolt barely missed the younger mage who fell back to avoid it. Strife wagged her long thin pointer finger at Bethany and tsked._

_"__No fair helping."_

_"__Monster! You're nothing but a coward!" A dark chuckle bubbled out of Strife. She turned her attention back to Anders and took a menacing step forward._

_"__Even with the help of your spirit friends you can not beat me. Give up!" Anders fueled by Justice's rage set his feet to cast a spell. He was waiting for an opening and knew he had only one shot._

_"__I will never submit again Strife. I would rather die."_

_"__I can arrange that mage." Anders threw a warding spell up just in time as Strife sent a fire ball at him. "I will enjoy burning you. I think I will even heal Hawke just so she can watch you die before I do the same to her." A fire storm came next and Anders let out a pained scream as the fire singed his clothes and skin. He grit his teeth and stood his ground. The ward kept most of the fire at bay, but not all. He fell to his knees and looked over at Miranda. She too was beaten and exhausted, but she kept trying to heal Leigh's wounds. "I will not be defeated! Thedas is mine and there is no one who can stop me!" Meghan wiggled in Cullen's arms and broke his grip on her. Dropping on to her feet she ran for her parents. _

_"__Meghan no!" Cullen and Bethany tried to reach the girl, but Meghan was fast. Strife smirked and cast her hand towards the girl as she ran. Sick green light coursed to her fingertips. Anders struggled to his feet to place himself between his daughter and the spell. His legs betrayed him and he fell back to his knees. _

_"__Leave her alone! She is just a child! She is innocent!" Strife cackled and let her spell fly at the girl. Meghan turned and smiled. Her small hands were out in front of her and she caught the spell. Shock registered on everyone's face, but the girl kept her sweet grin._

_"__How!?"_

_"__She is purity, pure innocence. Evil can not touch her." Sebastian limped out of the rubble supported by Fenris and Isabela. "Every child of the Maker is born innocent even you Strife, were born innocent. Life breaks us, takes our innocence piece by piece, but a small little part always remains."_

_"__She is mortal, fragile. I can kill her easily."_

_"__Aye, but there will always be innocence. Strip all else away, faith, love, justice, courage, valor, hope, and fortitude, but you will still have what we are when we are born. Every child is born pure, untainted by the world around them. It is life and what happens that shapes us. Makes us good or evil, teaches us to have love for our fellow man or hate them. You have shaped so many lives to show hatred. Meghan was raised in a home where she was protected, cherished and loved by all around her. You cannot destroy that." Meghan turned the green ball of energy between her hands. As she did so the color changed to a bright silvery light. The little girl's smile had not left her face as she turned and let the ball go. It floated passing first through Anders, then to Leigh and Miranda. It made it's way to the entire group and as it touched each one their wounds healed, their strength returned._

_"__NO! Impossible!" Leigh jumped to her feet and began walking toward Strife. She made no move to draw her blades or use her magic. The look on her face was one of pity, not of anger. Once she was close enough she stopped and held out her hand to the demon._

_"__It is over Grace. Your reign over Thedas is at an end and it is time to give up. I don't want to kill you, but I will. I am giving you one last chance to end this peacefully." Strife glared at Leigh and snarled. Her gaze ran over all of the ones who were against her until it landed on Meghan who was standing close to Anders. A wicked smirk formed on her lips. Before Leigh could move the demon lunged claws first. Anders reacted and swung his staff connecting with the creature's head. Strife fell to the side and tried to scramble to her feet only to find Fenris standing over her. _

_"__Going somewhere?" For the first time fear shone on the demon's face. There had never been an opponent she could not defeat before. The closest anyone had come was Knight Commander Drea and that had been over a thousand years ago. Now she faced nine people and she did not like the odds. She had one more card up her sleeve and now it seems like she did not have much of a choice._

_"__No, but you will be." Leigh felt the Veil tear. She quickly threw a shield up around her companions. Strife laughed with glee. "If I cannot have this world I will make sure your kind cannot either." _

_"__You're insane!"_

_"__What is the matter Serah Hawke? Do you not like what I have done." Leigh snarled. Strife had not just ripped the Veil, she had sundered it. Unlike Corypheus' attempt this time it was very powerful. Leigh could feel reality shattering as the tear got larger and larger. Her barrier was holding, but she could not keep it up forever. "Maybe now he will see that he made a mistake in paying all his attention on mortals." Leigh felt Meghan place her hand in hers. _

_"__Call them." Leigh looked confused for a moment then she nodded. Isabela and the other hand was completely lost._

_"__Call who?" _

_"__The others. With the Veil sundered...Anders hold the barrier. I have to send for help." Anders nodded and cast a tight bubble around them. Leigh placed her hands against it and sent out a pulse of magic. The Divine felt the power pulse out into the Fade and she laughed._

_"__Yes call out to those who want into this world. I will enjoy seeing the demons rip you to pieces." Leigh stood up and waited. __"___Now to wait." "It will not be long now Leigh. It ends here." "I hope so." "You know what must be done." "Yes I do."___Leigh met her husband's gaze. He knew as well as she did what had to be done. _

_"__I'm ready." Anders leaned down and whispered into Meghan's ear and the little girl nodded. The barrier overhead dropped and was replaced by a much stronger one made by the girl. "Miranda?"_

_"__I guess it is now or never right?" Bethany stepped closer to her sister. She saw the look of determination on the older Hawke's face. The same look echoed on Anders and Miranda's faces as well. It was also frightening._

_"__Sister?" Leigh could not met her sister's worried gaze, nor that of her other companions. She stared straight forward at the monster she had to defeat._

_"__Beth I need you to promise me that you will take care of Meghan."_

_"__Of course, but..."_

_"__Whatever happens I want you all to leave. There is nothing more you can do." Leigh turned back to face her friends and took a deep breath. "When we leave the barrier wait til her attention is on us. Put as much distance as you can between you and here. I only ask for one thing." Sebastian stepped next to Leigh and squeezed her hand._

_"__Whatever it is we will do it."_

_"__Take Morrigan's body back to Denerim."_

_"__Aye, we will. Hawke..."_

_"__I know, I love you too, all of you." Anders knelt down and hugged Meghan. The little girl had tears in her eyes and she gripped the feather pauldrons on his coat._

_"__Don't cry sweetheart."_

_"__I don't want you to go Da." Leigh joined them on the ground and wrapped her arms around both of them. Her one hand smoothing the auburn curls of her child. _

_"__You know we have to. If it is the Maker's will we will be right behind you and see you at home. You are very loved my little girl. You and your siblings." Meghan nodded and sniffed. Sebastian placed his hand on Meghan's back and gave her a sad smile. The little girl let go of Anders and threw herself into her true father's arms. He small frame shook with the sobs that came. A hint of pain shone on Anders' face, but he knew it was for the best. Meghan needed Sebastian. _

_"__Anders we have to do this now." With one last look at the group Anders and Leigh joined Miranda at the edge of the barrier. "Well it is now or never right? Never thought I would be doing this."_

_"__Mira, I don't think any of us thought about this."_

_"__Ready?" _

_"__Yes. See you on the other side." Leigh's skin cracked and red light glowed around her. Anders's did the same and so did Miranda's. Strife cackled manically and waved the three forward. _

_"__Only three will face me? It seems unfair...for you." Leigh raised her hands and let loose a fire storm above the demon. Strife sneered and then vanished. She appeared away from the fire and threw her own spell. Anders stepped forward and blocked the bolt from hitting his wife. Miranda let a spell form between her hands and gave a wicked grin._

_"__Hey Strife, let's see how you like to be hit by lightning!" Miranda flicked her wrists and sent the energy crackling into the demon. Strife laughed and batted the bolts away only to have Leigh hit her from the other side. "Not nice when you get a taste of your own medicine is it?" Anders saw their other companions run and gave a nod to Leigh._

_"__Miranda don't hold back!" _

_"__With pleasure." Both women let loose a torrent of spells while Anders covered them with healing spells. Miranda's magic was not as strong as Leigh's, but what she lacked in power she made up for in application. Miranda had always favored the entropy spells over most others. She looked to her left and let out a gasp when she saw the vortex of magic swirling around Leigh. Fire, ice, lightning and rock all danced around her cousin. It was beautiful and frightening all at the same time. Turning her attention back to Strife she could see true fear in the eyes of the demon. A slow smile ran over the mage's lips and she poured more power into her spells. Even if this fight killed her Miranda would know that she went down swinging. She would no longer bow to a lie._

_OoO_

_Sebastian took one last look over his shoulder before he and the others took off running. He could feel Meghan sobbing against his neck, but he knew he has no words to comfort her. That last hug might very well be the last time she or any of them would see Hawke and Anders alive again. _

_"__Blessed are those who stand before the corrupt and the wicked and do not falter..." Meghan lifted her head up and looked into her father's eyes. In her eyes he saw such innocence, but also a great wisdom. _

_"__Blessed are the peacekeepers, the champions of the just." The prince could not help, but smile at his little girl. "That's what they are champions, right?"_

_"__Aye my sweet one, it is what they have always been." Meghan looked around at the group and saw them all nod at her father's words. "It is up to them now, we cannot help them. Fenris please retrieve Morrigan's body. We need to head back to Denerim." Fenris returned quickly and Bethany case a ice spell over Morrigan so her body did not start to decompose. Isabela had found a cart in the town and they hooked it to their horses they had hidden when they had arrived. Meghan's eyes never left the hill where her parents were fighting. Even when Isabela gasped at the sight of a large glowing barrier appearing the little girl did not move. _

_"__We can't go back." Cullen stepped up next to the prince and Meghan and stared in awe. _

_"__Did they do that?" Meghan held up her small hand and closed her eyes. She sent a pulse of raw magic at the barrier and frowned._

_"__No, it is magic far beyond what a mortal or spirit could do." All the adults had worried looks on their faces. Meghan's expression became thoughtful. She tilted her head to the side as if listening to someone. "We can not help, but it does not mean they are alone. He has finally heard the pleas of his children." Isabela shook her head and her voice cracked a bit when she spoke. _

_"__So you are trying to tell us that the Maker is up there with them?" _

_"__No, he is not here, but he is watching."_

_"__Holy sh..." A sharp look from Sebastian halted the curse before the pirate queen could get it out. "Sorry, but you have to admit it went through your head too."_

_"__It did, but I would prefer not to curse in front of my daughter. If what she said is true we will only be in the way here. We need to leave." _

_OoO_

_Leigh felt the vanishing of Meghan's presence and she let herself have a sad smile cross her lips. Her heart ached at the knowledge she would never hold her children in her arms again or talk to her siblings again. She felt a squeeze on her arm and looked up to find Anders with the same look on his face. Miranda was kneeling next to them after Strife had used a spell that forced them to take cover._

_"__Well cousin, I have to say this has been the craziest thing I have ever done."_

_"__Miranda I'm..." The older mage held up her hand and smiled._

_"__Don't say you're sorry. You did more for mages in your life than most of us have in the last few years. I wanted to hate you for taking Anders from me, but he was never mine to begin with. I almost gave in to her, almost let her win. She has caused so much pain for over a millennium. I think it is time it ends." Miranda's skin began to crack and green light poured out of her skin and eyes. The voice that come from her mouth was no longer hers. "I will distract her. You both need to hit her with all you have." Before either could stop her Miranda ran out into the clearing. She threw spell after spell moving closer to the demon in hopes to wear her down. _

_"__You played your part well mage. I have to applaud you for tricking me into thinking you were mine."_

_"__I never belonged to you Strife. You might have caged most of us, but you never owned us. Our hopes, our dreams were always ours. We let you do this to us and I'd rather die then go back to the way it was."_

_"__I can arrange that mage." Miranda growled and ran straight for the demon. She could hear the screams of her cousin and Anders, but she knew she had to do this. In her head she heard the solemn voice of Drea._

_"___I am sorry Miranda."__

_"___I'm not. If this buys Leigh time to end this...I am too broken, too much has happened. I want peace, freedom and an end to all this pain. Death doesn't scare me anymore. I know where I am going now."__

_"___You have great courage Miranda Amell. I am glad to be with you at the end." ___Miranda swung her staff high and tried to bring it crashing down on the demon's head, but Strife was faster than she thought and caught the blow before it struck._

_"__Foolish mortal, I will enjoy this." Miranda screamed as a wave of dark magic slammed into her body. Strife laughed and grabbed at the writhing mage wrapping her long fingers around Miranda's throat. "Should I snap your neck or rip your throat out?" Miranda spit in the demon's face and sneered._

_"__Do...it!" Strife's mouth twisted into a wicked smile as she ran a long sharp talon across Miranda's neck. The mage never flinched or broke eye contact with the demon as her life's blood ran out. Strife was so engrossed in her kill that she did not hear Leigh charging up behind her. With a howl of rage Leigh slammed into the creature knocking her to the ground. Strife's grip on Miranda slipped and her body started to fall to the ground. Anders caught her before she hit and began pouring healing magic into her. _

_"__Mira you got to hang on...Maker please...Justice help me!" Miranda used the last of her strength to grab his hand and stop him from wasting his mana. She shook her head and gave him a weary smile. "No...I can still..." Miranda's eyes shifted to were Leigh was battling Strife. She lifted her hand and pointed in that direction. Anders could only nod. "I'm so sorry Mira..." She smiled again and took one last gurgled breath before her eyes slipped shut. Anders heard an ungodly howl and looked up to see Leigh aglow. Pain and sorrow was etched on his wife's face, but there was also the fire of rage in her eyes. When she finally spoke her voice was mingled with that of Mercy._

_"__You bitch!"_

_"__She told me to kill her Hawke. She would rather die than keep fighting. You mortals are all cowards." Leigh placed her right hand against her left and like Mercy had done down in the Deep Roads, she pulled a flaming sword out of thin air._

_"__You are the coward Strife and it is high time you know what death feels like." With the grace of cat Leigh twisted her body and leaped at the demon. Her first strike hit Strife right in the arm. Before the demon lashed out in retaliation Leigh was gone only to appear right behind her. Another blow connected and Strife roared in pain and rage. Leigh kept moving using her skills as a rogue and Mercy's skills as a warrior to keep the demon of balance. Before long Strife was a mass of wounds and burns. She stumbled and fell to the ground panting and hissing in pain. Leigh stood over her, her eyes glowing red and her face stoic. She readied her final blow, but Strife whimpered and made her pause. _

_"__Please I beg of you mercy. You have won...I...I will leave...I..." Leigh shook her head and drove the flaming sword into Strife's heart. The demon screamed and a shock wave of magic knocked both Leigh and Anders off their feet. All went still and dark on the mountain. _

_OoO_

_Anders woke to pain. His body felt like it had been ripped apart and then sewn back together. He tried to move, but his limbs betrayed him. Even his eyes would not open. He strained to hear anything around him, but silence met him. He opened his mouth to make a sound, but nothing came out. Even his mana felt like it had been stripped from his body._

_"___Justice?" ___Anders we met with only silence. Panic began to set in and he tried again in vain to move to heal himself. He had to find Leigh. She had been much closer to the shock wave than he had been. __"___I have to get up. Dammit, Maker please let me get up!" ___Warmth began to flood his body and the pain began to recede. Slowly he opened his eyes and saw a woman kneeling next to him. He tried to sit up, but she held him down._

_"__I have not finished healing you yet Leo. Please hold still for a moment more."_

_"__Who are you?" The woman smiled down at him._

_"__I guess you would not know me when I look like this. I am Mercy." His eyes went wide and he tried again to sit up._

_"__Leigh..."_

_"__She is over there. Justice is with her. Her wounds were not as great as yours were." Anders let his gaze shift over to the side and he saw his wife sitting up. She was covered in dirt and blood, but she looked uninjured. _

_"__Is it over?" Mercy held out her hand to him and helped him sit up. His body protested, but he force it up._

_"__Strife is gone, her reign is at an end. This does not mean to war is over, but I think that it is coming close." Mercy pulled him to his feet just as Justice did the same for Leigh. When she saw him she ran and threw her arms around him. For a long time they just stood there holding each other. Justice and Mercy stood close by, but stayed silent. Anders ran his fingers down Leigh's face to make sure she was there, that she was real. Tears streamed down both of their faces. The tears were of relief, joy, sorrow and also exhaustion. Leigh laced her fingers in his hair and pulled him in close so she could kiss him._

_"__We did it." _

_"__Yes love, we did. I thought...when I couldn't move or hear you. Leigh I thought I had lost you."_

_"__I told you before that you would not be rid of me that easy. I would fight my way back from the Void for you Anders." All Anders could do was laugh and hold her tighter. He looked over her shoulder and saw Justice smiling at him. _

_"__You did well my friend. Much more than I ever expected."_

_"__Had not faith in me did you?" Justice barked a laugh and clapped his hand on to Anders' shoulder._

_"__I had every faith in you, but what you did was beyond what we had ever hoped. I thought I was helping you and in turn you aided me."_

_"__Aided you?"_

_"__I remembered what is was like to be mortal, to love, to cherish life. I had forgotten. In helping you I found myself again. I am whole again, as you are."_

_"__You have Mercy."_

_"__And you have Leigh. You do not need us anymore. The journey to heal is now up to you."_

_"__I thought we couldn't separate. That only death could..." Mercy shook her head and stopped Anders words._

_"__We did not know if it could be done, but it seems the Maker wants us home and you to live your lives without our interference." Leigh felt tears burn her eyes and she let go of Anders to take Mercy's hand. _

_"__Pash I..."_

_"__You do not need me anymore Leigh. You are a strong woman now, not the scared little girl I found in the Fade all those years ago. Justice and I have done what we set out to do over a thousand years ago. Drea and I stood against her together as was our father's will." Mercy moved to where Miranda's body lay and she let out a sad sigh. "I am truly sorry."_

_"__It was her choice. She stopped me from healing her. I think she wanted to go." A voice from behind them made the group turn. _

_"__She wanted peace Anders. The Templars, they had damaged much of her spirit. She wanted to go on her terms not theirs." The woman in front of them was the carbon copy of Mercy, but where she wore robes, this woman was in full armor. _

_"__You're Drea."_

_"__Yes, and I will be forever grateful to you both for all you have done. Know that all who have fought for this will find their place by the Maker's side. Our father is very proud of you all. You still have much to do and the lands will have to heal after this, but I am sure in time both sides will find a lasting peace."_

_"__Our friends that left?"_

_"__They are safe, as is your younger brother. The battle at the river Dane is over. The Orlesians surrendered when they found themselves surrounded by Ferelden's army and Tevinter's. Never thought I would see the day that those two lands would fight to aid each other." Mercy chuckled and shared a look with her sister. "It is time sister. We need to return to the Fade."_

_"__What about Meghan?" _

_"__She will grow as any other child does. She will change, but she will always hold a light in her heart. We will still guard her in the Fade til we know she is strong enough to stand on her own."_

_"__Thank you." _

_"__It is you that has our thanks Leigh Hawke. Farewell." Anders held Leigh and both watched as the three went back into the tear in the Veil. As Mercy walked through she turned and waved goodbye. The tear sealed behind her and reality returned to normal. Leigh and Anders gathered the splintered wood that had once been the Chantry here and made a funeral pyre for Miranda. Both watched the flames in silence until only embers remained. Leigh took the ashes and spread them to the winds._

_"__She is free." Anders gave a sad smile._

_"__Yes she is love. We are free. Our children are free. I'd never thought I would see the day. When we were in Kirkwall I always thought I would die for the cause. To be standing here with you now...the feeling is indescribable."_

_"__Before we head back to Denerim I want to stop and take one last look at Lothering."_

_"__We won't be able to get very close love, the Blight..."_

_"__I know, but I have to see it. I have to say goodbye."_

_"__I understand." Anders held out his hand and Leigh laced her fingers with his. "Shall we?"_

_"__Yes."_

_**Only one more chapter to go. Thank you all for reading and following me on this wild ride. I have most of the next chapter written so I am hoping to have it up soon. **_

_**Raven**_


	55. Chapter 55

**Well here it is the last chapter of Bound By Compassion. I want to thank all my readers for sticking with me all this time. Ending this fic is kinda bittersweet for me. I love these characters and hate to ..I don't want to say leave them behind, but to not have them in my head as much anymore. I do want to add this little bit though so you know this story has had my heart since I started. The name I gave Anders as his real name is actually my husband's name. He is very much like Anders in many ways, both in Awakenings and in DA2 personality wise. I think that is why I love the character so much. Again I thank you all and hope you will enjoy this little epilogue.**

**Raven **

Varric looked up from his book and closed it in dramatic fashion. The children that had been sitting at his feet stared up at him with wonder. Out of all the audiences he has ever had, this one was his favorite. The raptured attention he still had made him chuckle softly. One of the older children stood up. The boy looked bothered for some reason.

"Something on your mind kid?"

"That can't be the end of it. What happened to them all?" Varric scratched his chin, amused by the young man's outburst. The woman that had been sitting in the corner stood up and placed a hand on the boy's shoulder.

"James it is getting late and Serah Tethras has been reading to you for most of the day. The questions can keep til morning. Now off to bed with all of you. I will be in soon to check on you." The group rose to their feet and went to their rooms. James gave one last questioning look, but soon moved when his mentor gave him a challenging glare. Varric rose from his chair and groaned.

"Maker I am not as young as I use to be." A flash of magic lit the room making the dwarf sigh in relief. "Thanks Rosie."

"You are very welcome Uncle Varric. I am glad that you could come and read to the children. They so love your stories."

"I remember you use to love them too. I know I don't compare to Arden, but..."

"I miss her, but she is at peace."

"How is Anders taking it?"

"You know Da, he keeps busy. Reading tomes, training young mages. I swear he does not act like a man his age."

"Have you been back to Starkhaven?" Meghan smiled and patted the seat next to her. Varric sat back down and waited for her to speak.

"I have, since my little brother is soon to be crowned prince and marry Ellie Theirin in a few months time I have been traveling a lot. Talisen has stated he needs to learn his Gran's trick of turning into a dragon so we don't have to be traveling as long all the time."

"For the life of me I never thought you would end up with him. If he breaks your heart..."

"You can take a number behind both my fathers, my mother, Uncle Carver, Aunt Beth, my brother, my sister, and well you get the idea. I am far from the innocent little girl you remember Varric. I am a woman now, not a child."

I know Rosie. It's just hard for us old folks to see you as anything other than that sweet little girl." Meghan let out a bell like laugh and stood up to finish putting the cushions from the children away.

"Tally has always been a complete gentleman so no worries, okay?"

"Still all the same we will be watching him."

"You are all as bad as my Da. Go get some sleep Varric. The children will be banging down your door come daybreak."

"Alright Rosie, I get it. See you in the morning."

"Night Varric."

"Night Rosie."

OoO

Meghan made her way down to the dorm rooms and check in on all her charges. Most of the children here were orphans. All of them born with magic in their blood, but no one to help them understand it. The academy had been Anders' pet project after the war had ended. He found the most talented enchanters from all over Thedas to come and teach. The mages were taught not only to control their power, but how to use it to help their fellow man. It wasn't perfect and from time to time some mages would take up darker arts, but there was progress. Meghan made sure all her charges were in bed and once she was done she headed to her father's office. She found him reading like she always did. His once blonde hair was now streaked with white, but his amber eyes still held a twinkle of mischief. Though not her father by blood Anders would always be her favorite father. He raised her, taught her how to use her healing magic and he had never treated her differently from her siblings.

"What are you reading this time Da?" Anders smiled and turned from his book.

"Just a tome from the Dalish. It has some very askew views on the Fade and spirits."

"Askew?"

"Let's just say the author did not see the difference between a spirit and a demon. The logic almost reminds me of Merrill when I first met her." Meghan took the book from his hands and flipped through it. An amused smile came to her lips and she snapped the book shut. "Did the children enjoy Varric's story?"

"I think so. James wanted to know what happened to everyone after the Divine was stopped. Varric will be continuing the tale tomorrow. He likes his audience. Those ween ones held on to every word he spoke."

"Varric will always be a tale spinner. Your mother and I owe him a great deal. If not for him we might not have found each other again."

"When is Mum due back?" Anders stood and let out a small sigh of relief. Sitting was not as easy as it use to be and his body stiffened if he stayed seated too long. A flash of white magic touched him and he chuckled.

"I can do that on my own sweetheart."

"I know, but I beat you to it."

"So like your mother, stubborn and wonderful. I am hoping she will be back in a few days. She and your brother went to meet with the king about getting a deed for some land."

"For?"

"That would be telling. All I will say is it is needed." Meghan huffed and rolled her eyes. She hated when she was kept in the dark. She changed her expression to one she use to use as a child. It always let her get her way, at least where Anders was concerned "That look no longer works on me my dear and your mother would kill me if I ruined it. I fear her far more than I fear you." Meghan giggled and gave up the doe eyes.

"I guess I will just have to wait then." Anders placed his hands on her shoulder and leaned forward to kiss her forehead.

"Yes you will. Patience is a virtue my dear."

"I thought I already was a virtue?" Anders barked a laugh and shook his head.

"You are. It was the main reason we fought so hard to change the world and why now we teach the way we do."

"Surely, it wasn't all for me."

"Not all of it, but in you we saw the hope of the future and still do. We also see it in your siblings."

"Karl is like a bear, strong, proud and honorable. Drea is more like Mum. She is sleek, crafty and deadly. I am just a mage Da, nothing more."

"Oh little one if you only knew. I think that is the reason we all have ribbed Talisen so much. We had to make sure he was worthy of you."

"Da!"

"I know, I know, you are a woman now and can handle your own affairs, but I am your father and I can be protective if I want to be."

"Maker help him then, because he has you and Papa to contend with."

"One of us can shoot lightning at him, the other arrows. The boy is doomed."

"Andraste's knicker weasels!" Anders threw back his head and laughed loud and hard.

"That's my girl." Meghan sat down next to him on the desk and laughed til her sides hurt. It was moments like this that made everything they had all gone through worth it.

OoO

"Alright were was I?"

"Hawke and Anders had just defeated Strife." Varric smirked and opened his book back up.

"Okay well let's see. I think before we get back to them let me tell you what happened to the rest of their group during this little war." Varric's words poured over the children and they all sat listening with great earnest. "The battle for the River Dane was won like the spirits had told them. Carver Hawke was named captain of the king's army. A title that he still holds today. His wife Ori is now one of the top mages that advise the rulers of Ferelden and splits her time between that and raising her children."

"What about Bethany and Ser Cullen?"

"Bethany and Knight Commander Cullen married and now live in Amaranthine. Bethany serves as court mage to Arl Nathaniel Howe and Cullen had put aside his sword and shield for a simple life of a farmer. They have a boy that they named Malcolm after Hawke's father." Varric waited to see if there would be anymore questions, but the children stayed silent. "Hawke's other companions did not stray far from Ferelden after the war had ended. Captain Aveline and Ser Donnic still guard Kirkwall and it's people. A new viscount was named and the city is thriving again. The dark past it once held is being washed away. Isabela and Fenris surprisingly are still together and still sail the open waters between here and The Free Marches. The pirate queen has mellow at least a bit and no longer plunders ships. Now she runs supplies and people to places hit hard by the war. She never forgot the debt she owed Hawke and has paid it back more than a hundred fold as far as I am concerned."

"What happened to Merrill?"

"Ah, Daisy is with her people in the New Dales. She has become Keeper of her clan and guides them well. She visits from time to time, but does not leave her people for long. After her first clan died at Sundermount she feared she would never be able to return to any clan. The lesson she learned and the price she paid gave her wisdom. Hawke's friendship gave her strength to try again. I miss the girl, but I am glad she has found her place in life." Meghan had silently moved into the room followed by Anders and Talisen. They sat quietly behind the children and listened. "Whose left?"

'Sebastian!"

"King Alistair and Queen Ashlyn!"

"I will start with the king and queen. When the group returned from Haven without Hawke and Anders they had returned the remains of Morrigan to her son. Queen Ashlyn mourned the death of her friend and invited her son to live with her and the king. The family soon grew with the birth of a baby girl Eleanor. Duncan Theirin will take the throne in a few years, but for now his parents rule the land. Much of the land was untouched by the war because the queen closed the borders before the worst of it took hold. Ferelden was once the poorest nation in Thedas, now it's wealth rivals Tevinter's. Starkhaven also thrives under the rule of it's prince. Sebastian returned home and found his new bride was with child. They had married right before he had left to help Hawke fight the Divine. With Kirkwall's army and help from Antiva and Rivain, Starkhaven was able to drive back the small army the Divine had sent to punish the Vaels for their refusal to fight for the Chantry. Kali Vael kept her people safe in her husband's absence. Months after his return Kali gave birth to a son, who while younger than his sister is slated to become ruler of Starkhaven. Meghan Hawke as far as I know wants nothing to do with ruling a country."

"No I don't." The heads of all the children turned and they stared at their teacher in awe. "And it is Meghan Vael, Varric. I took my Papa's surname."

"Sorry Rosie, I forgot. So as you can see kids Meghan is now a teacher of magic."

"Does that mean...?" James eyes were trained on Anders. The older mage just winked at the boy and grinned. "Holy Maker!"

"I think they figured it out Blondie."

"Seems that way. It was bound to happen sooner or later." Both men began to laugh hearing the children talk over one another to get their questions answered. It took over an hour to calm them down enough for Meghan and Talisen to get them out of the room and off to their lessons. Once they were gone Anders clapped his hand on Varric's back and sighed. "I never thought I would see that kind of admiration in anyone's eyes like I saw in those children today."

"You more than earned it Blondie. You started something back in Kirkwall that shook the world..." Anders' eyes turned a little sad and he frowned. "It was worth it. All you and Hawke fought for...you both changed the world."

"The cost of it though...Many good people died to get us here."

"Yes, but many more good people live because of it." Both men stayed silent for a few moments, lost in their own thoughts. "Well, I'd better get back to Sigrun before she comes to find me. I will see you at the wedding."

"Which one?"

"All of them. You and Hawke will be empty nesters soon, well at least where your own brood is concerned."

"The children here will keep us both very busy for years to come. Tell Sigrun I said hello." Varric handed the large book back to Anders and began walking out of the room. "And Varric?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you, for everything."

"Ah, Blondie you're making me blush."

OoO

Anders blew out the candle and stood up from his desk. He had been catching up on much needed missives and letters while Meghan had been teaching. If it had not been for the persistence of his cat he would have worked straight though the night. Anders had found when Leigh was not there to tell him it was time for bed, he would fall back into old habits that he had thought had died after Justice left him. He hated sleeping alone pure and simple.

"Sovereign for your thoughts?"

"Leigh!" With the speed of a man much younger than his age Anders crossed the room and picked his wife up in his arms. Leigh laughed and gave him a quick kiss before he put her back on her feet.

"Hello love. Missed me I take it?"

"You have not idea. How was Denerim?"

"The same, noisy as ever. Ashlyn told me to say hello and that she can't wait for the weddings."

"I bet. We will all be busy between them all." Leigh nodded and began taking off her travel clothes. She sighed as the leather slipped from her body and she put on her nightgown.

"Karl is heading for Kirkwall and will meet us in Starkhaven for Sean's wedding."

"Why Kirkwall? I thought he hated it there."

"My dear husband are you truly that blind?" Anders quirked and eyebrow and waited. Leigh let out a sigh and sat down next to her beloved. "He is going there to see the girl he loves."

"Wait what? When did this happen?" Leigh giggled and leaned into his side.

"He met her at one of the many parties in Starkhaven. She is a guard recruit."

"Maker, where in the Void was I that I missed that?"

"He has been keeping it quiet for now, but we will see them together at the wedding. I think you will like her."

"You've met her?"

"Yes, and so have you, but it has been years. She is ever bit as tough as her mother and twice as stubborn."

"Karl fell in love with Aveline's daughter. I guess our children did not look outside of our circle of friends did they?"

"No, but I like it that way. It makes it feel like we are all still family. With Meghan soon to be marrying Talisen Theirin and Drea engaged to Thomas Howe, I think it was inevitable for Karl to find someone in our group of friends to become attached to."

"So did you get the deed?"

"Yes, we can break ground in spring." Anders wrapped his arm around Leigh and led her to their bed. "I'm sorry I missed Varric."

"He will be at the wedding so you two can catch up then. For now though my love I think we both need to get some sleep. We are not as young as we use to be."

"No we aren't."

"Any regrets?" Leigh turned her silver eyes up to meet his amber ones and she shook her head.

"You?"

"Only one really."

"Oh, what is that?"

"That it took me so bloody long to give into you all those years ago. I love you just as much now as I did when we first met Mo Aman Cara."

"I never get tired of hearing you call me that."

"Good, because you will be hearing it for eternity." Leigh slipped herself under the soft sheets of her bed and curled up next to Anders.

"I think I can live with that." Leigh kissed him softly and melted into his arms. "Good night Anders.

"Night love."


End file.
